Wrath and Order

by Agurra of the Darkness

Reincarnation is a funny thing? Sometimes you're reborn as another person, sometimes another species and in some cases...you're reborn as the living embodiment of Rage and Destruction, acting as one of the Rulers of Hell itself in a completely different universe, tasked with keeping some modicum of order. Life really is wild isn't it? (ONESHOT)

Hey everyone, it's me doing another Oneshot before my next Avatar and Revolutionary Chapter. This one is the Helluva Boss crossover which I thought up after watching Mastermind, though some of it was cooking in my head for a bit prior to that, hope you guys enjoy it.

Again, just to be clear this is a Oneshot, but if anyone wants to do something with the concept have at it.

Lastly, thanks a bunch to BonesBoy15, who was instrumental in helping with this oneshot, both as a Helluva Boss fan and an experienced writer of the characters. Couldn't do it without him.

Now: LET US BEGIN!

-Wrath and Order: Start-

"Wha….what, where am I and why's everything so dark?"

Eyes looked around for some kind of a light, a glimmer of any kind…yet there was none. As far as his eyes could see there was nothing but…An Endless Dark.

"HELLO! IS THERE ANYONE HERE!?" His voice boomed loudly across the void, yet received no answer, not even an echo. And with that, a growing sense of dread started to set in.

However, it only lasted for a moment before, to his surprise a bright light pierced through the darkness, forcing him to cover his eyes. "Oh great, now what?"

Through his fingers he could just vaguely make out two figures as the light slowly started to grow dimmer, and as it did they seemed to notice his presence. Also why was he hearing the flapping of wings?

"Well, this is certainly a surprise." A female voice spoke out, sounding soft with an air of refinement and authority behind it. "I could've sworn we would be the only ones down here."

"That's what everyone above said. And they don't tend to make that kind of mistake." That second voice was more masculine, yet also sounding fragile at the same time.

Finally pulling his hand away enough to make eye contact, he opted to be as blunt as possible. "Not to be rude or anything but who the hell are you two supposed to be?"

"Hell?"

Both spoke almost perplexed by his word choice.

"What is…Hell?"

-Wrath and Order-

The blare of a loud alarm broke the silence and peace of slumber within one massive, if spartan, bedroom within the Ring of Wrath. An angry fist slammed down hard onto a rather study looking metal clock, reducing it to fragments of scrap and springs, allowing silence to return to the massive room for a brief moment, before an equally loud knocking replaced it.

"Sir, I know you heard the alarm, you need to wake up. You have a busy day today."

With a groan, the occupant of the bed groaned angrily, rubbing his forehead in an attempt to wake himself up.

"If she knows I have to wake up, why does she insist on a damn alarm clock? It's not like I'm Bel, who needs a nuke to go off to fully wake up."

Finally lifting himself up and allowing the sheets to fall off, his right arm reached out to the other side of his bed.

"Hey, V? You awake yet? Sorry about the clock, but you know how I get about….Huh?"

Instead of finding a warm body to greet him, his hand instead wrapped around a small piece of pink paper with red writing on it.

Sorry I didn't text, but didn't want to wake you up.

Had an early rehearsal this morning and promised to meet some friends at a pub down in Lust later. But I'll be home later tonight and then I'll be all yours for the next month.

Later

Love V

Sighing and running his hand through his blonde locks, casually brushing against a pair of black and white horns as he slowly put the note on the nightstand and got up from his bed.

"Really wish she'd just tell me about that sort of thing before instead of leaving me alone in the morning." He sighed again as he quickly opened a large walk in closet and started getting dressed.

Another knock came at the door, before it opened a slight crack. "Lord Satan, are you decent? I again need to stress that we have an especially busy schedule this morning."

"Just come inside Zenia, you know if the door isn't locked I don't have a problem with you walking in." The Lord's voice came from the open closet. "And we talked about this already, you don't have to call me that when it's just us or Verosika's around."

"Apologizes Lord…I mean Naruto." Opening the door fully, a rather young and attractive woman with pale red skin walked in.

In terms of height she was a little over five feet, with short dark blue hair cut near her pointed ears, a pair of red, black tip horns sticking out of her head, a pair of red and black wings jutting from her back and a red, arrow tipped tail near her backside. Attire wise she wore what appeared to be a leotard resembling a high school swimsuit with the sleeves and collar of an office shirt, a short pale orange tie, and low-heeled blue shoes, small broach with a pentagram lay near the collar of her outfit.

Her outfit, coupled with her D cup breasts and full backside, made the woman quite eye-catching, more so with the pair of glasses over her dark blue eyes, giving her quite the sexy secretary look. Said eyes were currently gazing at the still open closet, drifting every now and again to the tablet in her arms.

"I see we'll need to commission another alarm clock for you. I'm starting to think we should request Lord Asmodeus take care of it. He could probably make you one that you can't destroy."

"And he'd probably cram the thing full of dildos and make the alarm the sound of someone climaxing. I don't need to listen to that kind of crap in the morning."

The sound of clothing ruffling a little sounded as Naruto kept speaking. "So, what are we stuck dealing with today? Other than the usual crap?"

Zenia's finger quickly started tapping away at the tablet. "You need to finalize the bi-monthly crop shipments to each of the Rings. Lord Mammon is again insisting on increasing his usual shipment by nearly 3 times the normal amount."

A growl could be heard along with a smell similar to ash starting to enter the room. "If that bloated assclown wants that much food, he can make it himself. How is it that Bee is never the one making unreasonable food demands? Least we can talk without me having the urge to violently pummel her after every other sentence."

Zenia sighs as she continues to scroll through. "On the subject of Mammon, he's demanding you pay him a rather considerable sum if you want to start providing Greed with security. And I don't think he'll back down on this."

That earned a loud roar and bits of flame from the room, that Zenia remained stone faced for despite sweat forming on her brow from the heat.

"Anything else?"

Zenia's eyes drifted to the last major thing on the list. "Lastly, you're needed in Pride, apparently one of the Goetia has committed a serious breach of trust and is being charged."

"Oh? One of those upper crusted chickens finally did something they can't just buy or blow their way out of? Heh, might actually improve my mood a little for once. Who's the proverbial pigeon?"

"I believe it's Prince Stolas, my lord." Zenia said, looking at the name on the Court Order. "It appears he's subtly being accused of knowingly giving his Grimoire to an Imp, in order to grant them access to the mortal realm."

"SHIT!" Naruto's angered voice shook the room as he finally exited, now clad in a mauve tank top under a black torn vest with tassels, red lapels, and golden fasteners shaped like barbell weights, black leather trousers with a belt that has a golden skull buckle, and black boots.

The shirt itself was open enough to reveal a large pentagram tattoo on his chest, while also exposing his muscular arms to air, displaying his dark orange skin and numerous tattoos on his biceps and shoulders, while vein-like markings ran up his forearms.

All in all he looked strikingly similar to his original human appearance, even having the same blonde, spiky hair, marks on his face and blue eyes…atleast in his human form.

His hand quickly took the complaint document from Zenia and scanned it over, an extra pair of orange colored eyes appearing on his forehead.

"Damnit, and here I was hoping Stolas was one of the few of those blue blooded buzzards who at least somewhat had his head on straight." The blonde groaned, already knowing where this situation was headed. "And I don't suppose Mr. Big Boss of Hell Itself will be available to handle this particular trash fire?"

Zenia's eyes briefly drifted to a poster sized image of a pale skinned man with yellow eyes and a top hat with apple and snake decorations. The image itself however was hard to make out due to the various knives, axes and other weapons, as well as a few colorful bits of language and scorch marks included on said decoration.

"Unfortunately not sir. His Majesty insisted that he's in the middle of an important project and wanted to leave it in your hands."

That answer was met by another large knife burying itself right in between the portrait's eyes, going in up to the handle.

"Important, my scale covered ass." Naruto snarled angrily, form shifting slightly as he scowled, before he and Zenia quickly exited his bedroom and started down the stairs. "Bastard is probably cooped up in his bedroom making more of those stupid ducks of his.

"That is a very likely possibility Sir." Zenia spoke with the utmost seriousness, mentally noting to acquire a fresh poster for the wall as the current one was about ready to disintegrate.

"He needs to either see a damn therapist or do his freaking job." Naruto's fists tightened as the many volcanic veins running along his arms started to glow. Immediately he was handed a small bust of Lucifer's face by Zenia, which he immediately crushed in his grip. "Better…still wish it was him I got to do that, too."

"Sir, I'm aware his Majesty going on this most recent, erm, sabbatical has put a lot of extra work on your plate, but I'm afraid there's little we can do about it. As Hell's Second in Command with Lady Lilith nowhere to be found and Princess Charlotte busy with her own projects…"

An angry groan met her immediately. "It falls to me….again! And I'm guessing the court case is set to begin pretty soon right?"

"Indeed, sir."

With a crack of the neck, the Sin of Wrath slammed his hands together, forming a familiar cross seal, and with a burst of fire, two replicas of the angry former ninja appeared.

"You two, handle the crop distribution and security contracts. I've gotta deal with a room full of stuck up demonic ass-ristocrats and a lot of courtroom shit to memorize."

With a nod the clones quickly headed off to do the jobs assigned to them, while Naruto turned to Zenia, who quickly pulled out a large stack of files he was already dreading going over.

"Okay, so who was the Imp that managed to convince Stolas to lend out his oh so important book to."

Zenia's eyes quickly zeroed in on the name on the front sheet. "It says here his name is Blitzo Buckzo. He runs an assassination business in Pride called The Immediate Murder Professionals, I.M.P. for short."

"Cute name." Naruto huffed as he started scanning the documents. "Wait, you said his name was Blitzo?"

"Indeed, sir."

"That name…why does it…?" Naruto quickly pulled out his phone and opened up a couple photos of him with Verosika, his eyes immediately zooming in on the very clearly crossed out heart tattoo on her right arm…and it finally clicked.

Zenia felt the entire room's temperature start to spike and quickly spotted the fiery veins on Naruto's arms start to glow, his body quickly growing larger as his skin turned a deadly shade of red, a second set of horns erupting from his skull, crimson wings and a matching tail appearing from his back.

Immediately she pulled out her phone and started typing out a number. "Code Red, I repeat CODE RED! Get Yogurt in here now!"

"ZENIA!" The demonic secretary flinched a little at her boss's warped and deeper voice, yet kept her professional demeanor, knowing that despite his temper, she was safe from his wrath. He huffed and snarled slightly. "Relax, I'm not gonna explode. I just found out something….very interesting about this case and the little red asshole involved."

Handing his phone down to her, Zenia quickly looked over the photo and held in a gasp, putting the pieces together very quickly. "Sir, perhaps we should…."

"We're heading to the Courthouse. NOW!"

-Pride Ring: Courthouse-

"Come on, guys! This is- this all just one big misunderstanding! Uh, is this about the orphans? 'Cause they were already sick to begin with."

Blitz practically begged and pleaded as the two robed guards led him into the massive courtroom, only for a loud voice to cut him off.

"SILENCE!"

The thunderous boom sounded as the titanic, draconic body of Naruto, aka Satan, slammed into the courtroom floor. He now stood in his full demonic form, easily towering over anyone in the room by about twenty feet at least. Human features were now absent as his body morphed to resemble a large, muscular horned dragon. Four magma colored eyes glared angrily around the room before they settled on the now shaking and likely a second or two away from pissing himself, Blitzø.

So, this is Verosika's ex-boyfriend? Naruto could feel the lava like blood in his veins heat up the longer he looked at the Imp, recalling the many, many times Verosika recounted the way the Imp had effectively abandoned her, robbed her and then used the money for horse riding lessons. In my own fucking Ring!

That already made him vow to deck the little red turd, but in times when they were alone during the early days of their relationship, Verosika would often get rather drunk and start to break into tears, asking what she did wrong or why he abandoned her. Asking if she'd been a bad girlfriend and if she was still a bad girlfriend. Fearing Naruto would abandon her the same way Blitz had.

This often led to long stretches of Naruto holding her tightly in his arms while whispering comforting words into her ears as she slowly fell asleep, a routine that lasted for almost a month before the pop star seemed to finally move on.

It was only thanks to centuries of anger management training and the fact his Lucifer appointed therapist, Yogurt, floating just behind him, annoyed the shit out of him that he didn't just throttle the little red bastard.

Also the fact he'd made sure to not only get the little turd permanently banned from any Horse Riding establishment in his own Ring, but EVERY Ring. Yes, now the only horse he'd ever get to ride is if he paid some weirdo to put on a leather horse suit at a sex shop or brothel.

And he'd made sure to also have Ozzie make it a rule to charge the little bastard the exact same amount of money he'd put on all of Verosika's maxed out credit cards…COMBINED!

What can he say, Wrath was all about getting payback…and the prankster in him still loved getting payback.

"It's a long trial though, so who knows. Maybe I'll get lucky."

Putting those thoughts aside for the moment, he spoke again, commanding the attention of the entire court.

"We are here today to pass sentence against the criminal Imp, Blitzo!"

At the mention of his name the Imp, putting on a very forced smile, raising his finger to try and get the court's attention. "Uh, a-actually sir, the O is…."

"Silent," Naruto growled as he leaned forward until his massive eyes were glaring the assassin Imp square in the face. "Which is exactly what you should be unless you're given permission to talk. Do I make myself clear?"

Immediately Blitz swallowed his tongue and dropped his hands, nodding rapidly, too terrified to even attempt to offer even a vague retort.

Satisfied that he'd quieted the reportedly mouthy Imp, The Sin of Wrath pulled back and addressed the court.

"Blitzo Buckzo," his voice rumbled through the room. "You, along with your fellow associates are hereby on trial for the theft of a powerful and dangerous Goetic heirloom with intent to use for illegal access to the mortal realm. For personal gain."

Blitz looked to the side to find Moxxie, Millie and Loona all tied up in chains not far from him, looking just as uneasy as he was. Though the former circus performer practically yelled out at the sight of his adopted daughter with a muzzle completely over her mouth, but still kept his mouth shut, fearing the outburst it'd merit from the draconic judge.

However, Blitz's momentary lapse was caught by Naruto's four eyes, which immediately shifted to Loona, and an irritated groan was released, setting many in the court on edge.

"Oh, for fuck's sake, we talked about this!" His angry voice shook the entire courtroom, sending many of the Goetia into a panic, while his fellow Sins had varying reactions, most notably Ozzie and Bee looking concerned while Mammon pulled out some popcorn. Ignoring them, Naruto's massive finger immediately pointed to Loona, who let out a weak yelp of fear at the massive digit. "Didn't I explicitly state muzzling Hellhounds in this courtroom was only warranted if the defendant in question is uncooperative, belligerent, and/or violent during the trial?!"

Silence again hung in the courtroom, though several of the demonic guards were visibly sweating from the rage and heat the former ninja was letting off, while Bee was silently cheering on her fellow Sin in the background. The grin she flashed him in his peripherals only made him certain he hadn't imagined it in some bored fever dream.

"Seeing as how she just got here and hasn't done anything, there's no reason for it. So, take it off." No one moved. Barely a single demon breathed. Satan curled his lips to bare his fangs and slammed his extended arm into the wall, shaking the foundations of the court. "NOW!"

Immediately one of the hooded guards jumped to action and did as requested. The now unmuzzled hellhound took several deep breaths while stretching her jaws out and giving a brief look of gratitude towards the Sin of Wrath. The accused Imp similarly looked a little relieved. The temperature in the room seemed to cool a little as Naruto pinched the bridge of his nose to fight back a migraine.

I swear, Lucifer hires the most incompetent demons for this courtroom. No, for every important job. I might actually rebel if he keeps this shit up.

Taking a breath, he sat on the massive throne-like chair at the front of the court and directed his narrowed eyes back at Blitzø.

"Now then, where were we?" He feigned a bout of forgetfulness – couldn't let the masses know he was actually competent, lest they try and shove more responsibilities onto him – "How do you, Blitzo Buckzo, plead?"

All eyes turned to the trembling Imp, who was quietly panicking about whether or not he should say anything, but knew he was screwed if he said nothing. Thus he was forced to fall back on the one lesson his dad hammered into him during his circus days.

When all else fails in comedy or in life…Improv the FUCK out of everything!

"Uh, oh, right, the book! Eh, uh well the thing is I didn't steal it necessarily…I mean I tried to steal it but since when is attempting a crime illegal, am I right?"

Staring, unimpressed at his choice of words, Naruto had to fight the urge to slap himself at the statement. He took a slow, deep breath, closed his eyes, and then exhaled pillars of smoke. Does…does he not know what guilt by admission is?

Apparently not, given that one of his employees –Moxxie Knowlastname, if he remembered from the file correctly – had to point out that yes, trying to steal something was a crime.

At this rate, this'll be a very short trial. Naruto had to fight the urge to pull out his phone and text Verosika about some evening plans, when Blitzo spoke up again, this time a little more confident than before.

"Look, the fuckin' point is, I was given that fuckin book! I was allowed to use it." He spoke rather confidently, which only made the Sin of Wrath's migraine grow.

That's not the issue here, you fucking idiot! He prepared to say something when a rather loud and flamboyant voice cut through the courtroom.

"LIES! Your Honor…" From the nearby stands, Andrealphus, Marquis of Hell, Brother-in-Law of Prince Stolas, and a whiny ice-covered dildo (Leviathan's words, not Naruto's) slid down a path of ice down towards the courtroom floor. "Speaking on behalf of my aggressively attractive sister: I must testify that this brutish Imp was forcing himself on her husband, Prince Stolas, who, unlike a responsible and handsome Goetic demon such as myself, was..."

Tired of this charade, and so relieved that the party that forced this shit on him exposed themselves so early, Naruto's massive fist immediately slammed on the armrest of his throne, cutting the icy peacock off mid sentence. The Sin of Wrath's nostrils flared with smoke and his volcanic veins shone as his short-tempered fuse fueled them with heat.

"The POINT Andrephalus, get to it before I throw you and this case out of the nearest window." His emissive eyes narrowed and flared with golden light. "Preferably, into oncoming traffic."

The Marquis' bluster melted almost as quickly as his ice. He coughed to try and regain some of his ground.

"Apologies, your Honor. That is, this vile Imp forced himself upon my dear Brother-In-Law and in turn exploited poor Stolas's shame to get the book from him."

From his throne Naruto's eyes narrowed. He could practically smell the bullshit's reek as it fell from the Marquis's flapping beak.

"Hey, I didn't force shit!" Blitzo angrily yelled, only held back by the chains that bound his wrists.

Andrephalus sneered at the imp's retort. He hoped a mouthguard would appear to shut him up, but when none did, he opted for a different approach.

"Do you see?" He asked, gesturing at the imp and looking to the Goetic Spirits that lined the rafters. "Even now, this disgusting Imp continues to speak falsehoods. After he has already committed such atrocities against his betters! It is in the best interest of this court, that he be sufficiently punished and reminded of where he stands." The icy fowl slid closer to Blitz, smirking deviously as he looked down upon him. "After the disgusting affront he committed against my family and my dear Brother-in-Law, justice must be adhered to!"

"Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait." A new voice drew attention to the Goetia in the stands, more specifically, a crimson parrot Goetia with star shaped glasses. "Where is Stolas, anyway? Can't he speak on this himself? ¿Qué carajo?"

Restraining himself from groaning at the interruption, Andrephalus tried to brush off the question.

"Unfortunately," he began, "Stolas has not been informed of this trial. Given his delicate mental state, it was best he…"

"Terribly sorry everyone, am I late?"

Icy blue eyes snapped open and were followed by a choked gasp as the preening peacock turned to the courtroom entrance, where he found none other than Prince Stolas himself, standing there in fully regal garb, brushing off some dust as he addressed the court.

"S-Stolas…how…lovely to see you! Who told you about this trial?" Andrephalus could practically feel his carefully ladened plans melting away, only further exasperated by the neutrally evil, if not outright hostile glare the owl demon was giving him.

"I told him about it." The peacock's brow started to perspire as he turned to the massive Sin of Wrath, looking at him like a kid with his hand in the cookie jar. Satan's eyes narrowed as he stared at the trembling Marquis. "As Marquis Vassago pointed out, this trial concerns Prince Stolas as well. Why the fuck wouldn't we notify him about it?"

The question left quite a few in the audience on edge, some looking at Andrealphus with concern, as the former shinobi turned Sin seemed to be implying the lower ranked demon thought he could pull a fast one on him.

This is exactly why I hate dealing with these clowns. Internally Naruto practically ran through a mental list of equally corrupt scumbags who thought their money and status could save them from consequences. From Gato to Danzo, it was a never ending fucking parade! Only this time, here, he had the authority to make them play by the rules.

Whether they wanted to or not.

Especially when they didn't want to.

Oh yes, demons had better believe he was gonna abuse that power for every inch and pound of flesh he could. He had been screwed over by shady politics far too long to not be sick of it.

Probably one of the few, if not the only, real perk about this entire situation I'm in. Pushing that thought aside his eyes drifted back to Stolas, who approached the proverbial bench, giving Blitz a side glance but otherwise keeping an emotional distance. Now, let's try and see if we can get all the facts straight.

"Prince Stolas," Satan nodded to the late newcomer. "I trust you've made yourself keenly aware of exactly why you've been summoned to my courtroom?"

"Of course, Your Wrathfulness." The Prince bowed and kept his head lowered even as he spoke. Oh, breaking out the old traditions? Naruto was a little impressed. "I read through the document on my venture here, my Liege, and I am fully willing to cooperate. Though, please, punish me. The fault is strictly my own." Again his eyes shifted to Blitz who looked upon the owl monarch with concern and worry. "Blitzø, erm, the Imp was my pawn in all of this, nothing more. He is guiltless."

"Unfortunately, that's not how this works, Stolas," Naruto shook his head. The fool had been on the right track up until he tried to get the Imp off scot free. It was almost disappointing. Satan's eyes narrowed as the owl's shoulders slumped. "You know that. Both parties will present their case as is law, and if Andrealphus can prove what he claims…then both of you will be punished accordingly. No exceptions."

Blitzø looked ready to argue, only for Stolas to lightly glare him down, as the rest of the court shifted back to the Marquis who started this whole mess.

"Now then, Andrealphus. I trust you have actual evidence to back up your claims." The pitiful peacock gulped as the dragon of wrath leaned forward ever so slightly, smoke leaking from his mouth, a light, heated breath blasting his entire body, only causing him to sweat. "Because if you don't, not only will I dismiss this entire case right now, but I'll personally see to it that you are severely punished for wasting not only my time, but that of everyone else in this courtroom. Understood?!"

The last shout sent another scorching blast of air in the Marquis's face, actually causing him to breathe heavily and practically sweat buckets.

"Absolutely crystal clear, My Lord. And I do in fact have evidence to prove the sorted actions of this Imp and my Brother in Law." He smiled, a strained thing as he tried to adjust and straighten his plumage. Internally, however, the peacock was screaming.

Damn it all! Why did Satan have to call Stolas here? This was supposed to be little more than a formality, a public shakedown, a kangaroo court! Now I have to put actual effort into this whole sordid affair ...still, it should be worth it. With a wave of his hand, a large icy table formed in front of him, before snapping his finger, as several Imp servants appeared carrying large files and binders, which they placed on the table. Andrelphaus straightened himself out and glanced at Stolas and Blitzø like a hawk would its prey. I might as well enjoy this. Afterall, burying these two fools should prove quite amusing.

Clearing his throat to begin, Andrelphaus pulled a sheet of paper from the pile. "Your Honor, to start, I'd like to introduce eyewitness accounts taken from my sister and two additional trusted witnesses, who confirm they spotted the little red pest falling out of my extremely beautiful sister's bedroom window, with Stolas's Grimoire in his coat – and I'm quoting directly from her recounting of the event the words he said to her in front of the aforementioned others – that he was sorry he had, ahem, 'fucked', her husband. An admission of guilt and witnesses, milord."

Immediately both Stolas and Blitz turned several shades paler knowing exactly the moment he was referring to.

"Blitzø, why the fuck did you decide to escape out the fucking window? And with my book in plain view for that bitch to see?"

"Hey, I was in a fucking rush and it's not like I showed up with a backpack to put it in!" The Imp hissed back.

Levitating the testimony paper over to himself and looking it over, the account included a description of the book itself and how it was plainly visible from Blitzo's jacket pocket.

Guess Icicle Dick actually came prepared. Not exactly ironclad but it's a start at least. Turning his eyes to the party currently in the crosshairs he could already tell they were nervous. "Has the defense have anything to say on their behalf?"

Stolas looked ready to offer some kind of a well thought out response, only for Blitzo to beat him to the punch.

"Yeah, the bitch doesn't have any proof it was the Grimoire. Stolas has a library full of books that hag's likely never even glanced at. How's she know it wasn't one of those?"

"Very tactful, sir." Moxxie mumbled, already feeling their chances of escaping with their lives dwindling by the second.

Andrelphaus however, smirked. "Well, then allow me to introduce my next exhibit. I believe you're actually quite familiar with it."

A large TV screen rose from the lava below with the Marquis holding a remote and immediately turning it on. And then an all too familiar jingle started to play.

Oh, fuck! All four members of I.M.P immediately thought as they watched their company's commercial play for all in attendance to see.

"Ohhh, that's a catchy jingle!" Bee bobbed from side to side to the beat, grinning widely. "Shame it probably got a shitty timeslot."

"Timeslots doesn't mean shit in sales, cunt." Mammon merely sneered. "Feh, it's cheaply produced Imp crap. Even my lowest selling singles are more impressive, and I was drunk when I sang most of them."

The ad continued to play on until it reached the part where the very obviously visible portal came on screen…along with a very familiar looking book lying on the floor not far from said portal.

"As the court can plainly see, these imps not only are using the Grimoire, they are openly bragging about exploiting its power." Andrelphaus pointed to the image of the book on the floor. "The ad literally says 'We Come Straight Up from Hell' while they enter the portal only the Grimoire could produce."

A loud chorus of chatter sounded through the audience, with many nodding in agreement and the titular Immediate Murder Professionals feeling even more screwed, with the employees glaring at their visibly sweating boss.

"Really Blitz? You had to put the fucking book in the commercial?" Moxxie was practically salivating with rage at his employer's shortsightedness. "You couldn't leave that part out?"

"Yeah Blitz, I mean, I'm all for saying fuck you to authority, but thinking about it, that was really kind of dumb." Millie agreed with her husband, with less vitriol but still irritation. Loona didn't even bother to say anything, just groaning into her hands.

"What?! It was really catchy!" Blitzø weakly tried to defend himself. He looked up at Stolas. "This-this isn't that bad, right?"

"Blitzø…" Stolas similarly looked just as gobsmacked at the Imp's decision. He pinched the bridge of his nose. We're doomed. Completely, and utterly doomed.

It's official, this guy is a complete and utter fucking idiot! Naruto simply couldn't begin to process what he was looking at. The guy had literally advertised that he and his group were using a book they weren't supposed to have, to go into the human world without permission and didn't see the obvious problem with that.

Yes, he saw the irony there, especially given the shit he got up to as a kid; painting the Hokage Monument in broad daylight came to mind. That mostly merited getting yelled at and cleaning the paint off. The difference here was that the Imp's proud middle finger to the establishment came with a literal death sentence.

"Do you have any additional evidence of note, Andrealphus?" He asked more as a formality. The ad itself, along with the testimony, was pretty damning, but he didn't feel like leaving this to chance and was admittedly curious to see just how far this rabbit hole went.

Andrelphaus meanwhile looked like he was having the time of his life, pulling out a fairly large and stapled pack of papers.

"I currently have in my possession, the names and direct testimony from several Sinners located right here in the Pride Ring, all of whom are more than willing to testify that they were directly killed by the Imps currently on trial. Whom, I'd like to add, made no attempt to even disguise themselves despite being on Earth."

Immediately the peacock started reading off names, each feeling like another gun being pointed in the defendant's direction.

"Martha Manson, marked for assassination by Mrs. Matilda Mayberry, killed along with her husband and two children. Martha specifically with a point blank shot to the head by one Moxxie Knolastname and described in detail encountering multiple demons before she was killed."

Moxie immediately tried to make himself smaller. "Oh, crumbs."

"Hey the kids and the husband was the fucking human cops' fault! We had nothin' to do with that shit!" Blitzø argued futilely, only meritting groans from his cohorts as again he was flat out admitting to the crimes.

"Multiple beachgoers of differing sexes, killed in various ways including but not limited to shots to the head, asphyxiation, blunt force trauma, penetration with a knife in almost plain view of the public. Total number is unclear, but the number is confirmed to be at least ten victims. Testimony from Verosika Mayday and her own employees corroborates this story."

"OH THAT FUCKING SOUL SUCKING BITCH!" Blitzø practically roared, Stolas trying his best to keep him from causing a scene.

"Blitzø, you're not helping!"

The Imp however wasn't gonna hear any of it and looked about ready to say something else, only for a blast of fire to appear just meters away from his seat, Satan currently pointing his now smoking finger like a gun, the volcanic veins in his arms turning crimson with Yogurt trying to calm him down.

"N-N-Now Satan, remember what we talked about? Practice some meditation.. Channel you shock-ras–! A loud smack echoed in the chamber as the dragon's other fist sent the demonic guru flying into a nearby wall. A solid foot into the stone. Yogurt whimpered out a measly, "I quit" before he passed out.

"For the last damn time: it's pronounced Chakra not Shock-Ra," Satan snarled as he lowered his arm. He glared down at the imp. "And as for you!" Naruto struggled to hold back his anger, yet the jab at Verosika set him off something fierce and he wanted to make sure the little clown imp knew it. He jabbed a finger at Blitzø, who flinched and ducked behind Stolas. As if that would protect him. Naruto growled smoke from his mouth."You're beyond thin ice at this point, Buckzo. One more damn word, one more fuckin' outburst, you even blink at me funny, and I swear on my Sin, I will hold you in contempt of this Court. And you don't want that, for if you are held in contempt, your suffering will be legendary, even in Hell!"

The flames all around him erupted like volcanos as the Sin of Wrath took a moment to calm himself, actually taking out his phone and opening it to a picture of him and Verosika on one of their first real dates in the Lust Ring. It took some convincing, as the pop star had still been hesitant to try any kind of relationship beyond a quickie, but he'd convinced her to give him a shot. Needless to say, she was convinced by the end of the night. Looking at that picture brought his boiling blood back to a simmer as he turned to Andrelphaus who managed to keep his composure in spite of the Sin's outburst. Though, there was a noticeable puddle of melted ice around his feet, likely an attempt to keep himself cool.

"Continue, please."

"Right, ahem." The Marquis coughed again and returned to his point. "There was also the matter of the targeting of one Lyle Lipton. Said contract not only resulted in multiple clashes with Cherubs sent directly from Heaven, but also in the deaths of multiple humans who these Imps weren't even hired to kill."

Blitzø didn't even offer an argument. That one really was a colossal fuck up that it was a miracle they didn't get utterly chewed out for that particular situation.

"We're totally fucked aren't we?" Loona asked as bluntly as possible, none of the others even attempting to offer anything to the contrary.

The trial continued to play out in much the same way with Andrelphaus pulling more and more of I.M.P's dirty laundry, most notably the entire debacle at the Camp where Millie and Moxxie were practically made international Celebrities, the mess with the D.H.O.R.K.S. and the matter in LA with Stolas' own child, Octavia.

By the time it was over, Stolas was molting feathers like rain drops and Blitzø was mentally writing out his will in between trying to come up with some kind of half assed type of escape plan.

All the while Naruto/Satan looked utterly stunned at how much nonsense this group of five absolute idiots managed to get up to in the span of maybe a year. Possibly two.

How….HOW HAS THIS BEEN HAPPENING FOR THIS LONG!? He actually wanted to scream, wondering how Lucifer of all people just allowed this kind of insanity to go on without any kind of response. Pride was his Ring, meaning this was his problem! And yet when he turned his massive head to look back at Lucifer's throne, which sat several feet higher than his just for added lording, all that was there was the same note and duck he'd left years ago.

BRB 5 Min with a little Lucifer duck beside it along with multiple cobwebs forming over it.

When this case is over, we're having a long talk, you snake-faced son of a bitch. I don't care how many self help ducks you're making to get over the fact your wife ditched you and your daughter doesn't like you. It's time to start acting like the King you're supposed to be. If not to the fuckin Sinners, then at least to us!

Taking a moment to compose himself and breathe – yes, he was capable of doing that without Lucifer's little therapist hovering over him. He freaking mastered meditation when he was fifteen for crying out loud – Naruto was able to shift his focus to the defendants.

"Well, it seems to me there has been a lot of things going on under mine, as well as all of Hell's nose as of late. Does the defense have anything to say before I pass judgment on all of you?"

Seeing he had little chance and the game was up anyway, Blitzø decided to just go for broke.

"All I was trying to fucking do was rise above this stupid fucking place YOU ALL FORCED US INTO!"

The Sins had varying reactions to the rather loud and vitriolic call thrown at them. Bee and Ozzie both looked somewhat hurt and appeared to even agree with what was said. Belphegor was still sleeping – props to staying out even after Naruto lost his cool, he envied that sometimes – and didn't offer a response. Leviathan's two heads countered each other so they were neutral. Mammon, though...

"AH, put a fuckin' sock it in it, you little red cunt! Maybe now you'll learn to stay in your fucking lane!"

A couple growls were what he got in return from Bee and Ozzie. Both looked about ready to throw hands. They were held off from acting when Naruto raised his hand and quieted the three of his fellow Sins. He would ignore Mammon for now and talk to Bee and Ozzie later.

"It would appear that you're still missing the key problem here, Blitzo."

Hearing his full name recited again made the now angry Imp start to rage. "Oh yeah, and what is the problem you big red bitch?"

A loud gasp sounded through the courtroom, Stolas looking ready to jump in front of the arrogant Imp while the Sins stared aghast at what would usually be considered a suicide note. Belphegor even woke up and looked ready to run for cover once she got the gist of the situation. Everyone was half expecting the Sin of Wrath to literally erupt.

Yet instead, he only chuckled, before breaking out into full blown laughter, actually shaking the entire courtroom.

"Oh...I needed that. Thank you, Buckzo." Naruto's previous chuckling ceased with another sigh as reverted back to his business face. "Let me make something perfectly clear to you, since obviously it's the only way it'll penetrate that thicker than iron skull of yours. For starters, I don't have any kind of problem with you moving up above your station."

"Uh...I'm sorry, can you repeat that?" Blitz was expecting a lot of things to come out of the Sin of Wrath's mouth…mostly fire and a lot of angry yelling. Definitely not this.

"Sure." Naruto meanwhile opted to keep a more aloof air about him, not seeing any point for bluster and he had a point to make. "I actually respect that you have been making an attempt to improve your situation, and that of your employees'. An effort to make more of yourself in spite of what everyone else says about you. It's respectable."

Again Blitz found himself gobsmacked. He had Satan pegged as just another asshole royal wanting to keep him at the absolute bottom of the totem pole. "Oh…well, thanks I guess your, uh, royal highness? So then..what's the–?"

"The problem, Blitzo, isn't that you're an Imp or that you're trying to move up in the world or even the fact you're fuckin' Prince Stolas every other Friday night."

That last part made Stolas choke a little along with Blitz, while Andrelphaus actually looked horrified and stunned.

"Y-Your Honor, what are you saying?" The icy peacock asked. Naruto just gave him a side glance. He was so tired of this shit.

"I'm saying," he drawled the word out with a growl, to get across that he didn't want to be interrupted. "That I really don't give a shit who you or who any demon in Hell wants to or doesn't want to sleep with. I sure as shit don't care that Ozzie up there is doing all manner of unspeakable things with a cyborg Imp that I don't wanna know about, even when he refuses to stop talking about it when we have meetings about shipment delays and numbers."

The Sin of Lust's fiery face turned pink with embarrassment, recalling how his fellow Sin struggled to keep a smile on his face while listening to the many, many, sordid details of his and Fizz's bedroom activities.

"What can I say, I'm all about that Lust, baby. Who doesn't like to brag about being a freak in the sheets?"

"Hell yeah, let your freak flag fly, baby!" Bee gave her fellow Sin a high five even as Naruto groaned at her encouraging him.

"And obviously I don't have a problem with Bee over there sleeping with a Hellhound. And I don't need the details right now!" Naruto snapped, already hearing the Sin of Gluttony opening her endless motormouth to brag or thirst about her current 'chew toy'. "My point being, who you choose to share your bed with isn't anyone's business save your own and your partner's. Just keep that kind of thing to yourself, and I'm cool with it…pending a few obvious exceptions."

This time Stolas was the one who was a little confused, having genuinely expected that little matter to be the proverbial knot in their hangman's noose.

"I'm sorry, my Lord, but if that isn't the issue then…?"

Naruto actually groaned angrily, feeling like he needed a presentation to get the message across. "The issue here is that Blitzo…is a fucking idiot!"

"Hey, I take offense to that fuckface." Blitz yelled back, only for Satan to give him a flat express.

"Good, that's the idea." Leaning back into his throne and folding his hands under his chin, Naruto elaborated to the still confused masses around him. "You, Blitzo, have been illegally entering the mortal realm for over a year and have done everything in your power to show exactly why we have rules in place regulating that exact issue."

Snapping his claws, the large screen from earlier reactivated, going through several pieces of video feed pulled from Earth's internet, depicting more than a few of I.M.P's antics.

"Blatantly exposing yourselves in public, making almost zero attempts to disguise yourselves, causing untold amounts of damage and chaos on Earth, and practically exposing our very existence to humanity multiple times over!"

One last snap showed some video taken from the Lust Ring showing the fight between I.M.P and the Cherubs, with their souped up armor.

"You have clearly proven to have little regard for Hell's laws and no interest in adhering to said laws, in spite of the many missteps you've taken since acquiring Stolas's Grimoire."

The massive orange eyes of the dragon quickly shifted to Stolas, who winced under its furious gaze.

"And as for you, Prince Stolas. While I have no problem with your relationship with this imp, the fact you treated your Grimoire, an important artifact meant to serve the interests of Hell's Court, as a punch card at a strip club, while also taking part in some of the very illegal actions this imp takes to 'further his status', makes you just as guilty as him!"

At the mention of the word guilty, both Stolas and Blitzø felt the stomachs drop while Andrelphaus looked about ready to bust out of his coat in delight.

"Yes…Yes! It's happening!" He whispered in disbelief. Ignoring him, Naruto slammed his fist on the arm of his throne like a gavel, drawing all eyes to himself.

"Thus, based on the evidence presented here today. I find both defendants, Blitzo Buckso and Prince Stolas of the Ars Goetia, guilty as charged."

"No!" The entire I.M.P. staff practically shouted along with Stolas, as did a few others watching the trial from various locations…including one all too familiar pop star at a local bar.

"Yes!" Andrelphaus practically cheered.

Blitzø simply stared at the Sin of Wrath, before looking at Prince Stolas, trying to communicate to each other, yet neither found the words, simply standing before the inevitable end. From his throne, Naruto felt his phone ring. Reaching into his pocket, he looked at the screen and narrowed his eyes at what appeared on it. Sighing, he quickly pocketed the phone and shifted back into 'Judge-mode'.

"Stolas, for the crime of knowingly providing your Grimoire to this Imp for personal use and allowing him entry into the mortal realm without the required clearance you are hereby sentenced…."

Blitzø struggled against his restraints to try and grab Stolas and make a run for it, knowing full well it was the chopping block for the feathered fiend. Stolas simply stood his ground, eyes closed, weeping internally.

Forgive me Octavia.

"To be stripped of your powers for a period of no less than one hundred years from this point onward. Excluding circumstances pertaining to duties yet unfulfilled."

...I'm sorry what? Stolas' eyes snapped open and looked up at the Wrathful Sin, clearly confused. "I'm terribly sorry, your lordship, but I committed a serious crime…doesn't that mean I'm supposed to be…"

He ran his finger across his throat in the universal sign of execution, to which Satan looked at him like he was crazy for a minute before he sighed.

"Unfortunately, that's not how this works, Stolas. As a member of Ars Goetia, you have certain responsibilities and powers that Hell simply can't afford to lose, even if you are guilty of a serious crime." Naruto spoke with a matter of fact tone, knowing full well that politics in Hell were far more complicated and that unique abilities like the ones Stolas wielded were too valuable to just throw away. "As such, you will be stripped of your powers, rank, title and assets for a period of one hundred years. During which time I expect you to reflect upon the importance of treating said abilities with more respect and acknowledgement for the harm they can do in the wrong hands."

Standing tall and raising his palm a massive series of stone rings, with each Sin's titular emblem emblazoned on them, appeared before the Goetia prince. The rings quickly separated and formed a circle around Stolas, spinning rapidly as black lightning-like energy was sucked out of his eyes, sending the depowered demon to the floor.

Again Blitz fought against his chains, trying to rush over and pick the dethroned owl up, watching him strain himself to lift his weakened body up.

"But…what about my daughter?"

Looking like he was glowing at his victory Andrelphaus floated over to make some kind of a statement, only for Satan to stop him cold.

"You'll still be granted visitation rights to Octavia, the schedule of which you and your ex-wife can work out on your own. However, I expect said contract to be equal between the two of you. No reason your daughter should have to suffer for having two screw ups as parents."

At the mention of that, Stolas felt a massive sense of relief wash over him. It actually made him almost forget about losing his abilities. Sure that was unfortunate, but his daughter was far more important to him and as long as he could be there for her, he was willing to bear a hundred years as a plebeian.

Andrelphaus meanwhile looked considerably ruffled. Well, that's a bit of a pity. Was looking forward to rubbing that little matter in that disgrace's face…but then again, it's hardly of consequence. Not when the real prize is right in my grasp.

Clearing his throat to regain the attention of the court, he offered a brief bow to the Lord of Wrath. "A wonderfully handled case my liege, your judgment is as impeccable as always."

Sadly the buttering up turned to curdled milk from Naruto's expression, reading the Marquis like a children's book. "I take it there's something you'd still like to discuss Andrealphus. Don't waste any more of my time with flowery words and just get to the point."

"Of course my lord. I simply wished to discuss the matter of my former Brother-In-Law's legions and his position. After all, with him stripped of his powers and title, someone will have have to take up his mantle and seeing as how dear Octavia isn't yet of age I would be happy to–"

"Ah, right about that." Naruto promptly ignored the Marquis and turned back to Stolas, snapping his fingers and creating a small ring of fire that quickly wrapped itself around Stolas's wrist, revealing a clock that was steadily counting down.

"My Lord…what is this?"

"An exclusion clause." Satan spoke firmly, eyes trained on the clock on Stolas's wrist. "Throughout the entirety of your sentence you will be permitted to have access to your powers one day each month to perform your duties and only your duties, because no one else can and frankly your daughter doesn't seem mature enough to handle that responsibility."

Stolas stared at the clock with amazement, not anticipating such an act of mercy…while Andrelphaus was positively livid.

"Your honor, with the absolute highest respect possible, I must protest." Internally he was struggling to maintain his composure, despite winning the trial he was effectively walking away with nothing. "Surely there is someone else who can handle the job. After all, while Octavia isn't of age yet, she will be soon, certainly she can handle things once she comes of age?"

"She broke into the I.M.P facility, stole Stolas's book from THEM, went to Earth – without disguising herself, which incidentally why is that a fucking thing?! She's a Higher Demon!" Taking another moment to calm himself he continued. "I digress – the point being, she is a far cry from ready to even attempt taking up his responsibility, thus the duty still falls to him. End of discussion."

Not wanting to argue with the Sin of Wrath and invoke his ire, Andrelphaus relented. "Very well my Lord. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to make my dear sister aware of things…and as well as brew myself a very stiff drink."

With a flash of snow, the peacock was gone from the court, leaving Stolas under Satan's glare.

"Before I move onto the imp I have one last thing to say to you Stolas…get your shit together!" He leaned down until his massive face was near Stolas's, his heated breath blowing ash and smoke in the Goetia's face. "You clearly care for your daughter, yet her stealing that book was also a serious crime. However, I'm willing to overlook it since she only acted because you broke a promise to her that you made a decade ago. Though I don't agree with her actions, I do understand them. So, use this time to put more focus on your role as a father rather than your weird sex life with this freak. Understand?"

"HEY!" Blitz yelled but Stolas simply nodded. "I will, my lord, thank you for your mercy."

Nodding, Naruto stood up to his full height and shifted his attention to Blitz and the I.M.P members. "Now, as for you, Blitzo Buckzo. Obviously you aren't a Goetia and don't have any unique powers or abilities that would grant you the same kind of leniency as Stolas."

"Well thanks a fucking lot you big red hypocrite." Again Blitz figured he was screwed anyway, so why not get a few more words in. "Just cut my head off and get it fucking over with, long as you don't hurt my employees or my daughter, then I'm fine with it."

The I.M.P. members looked ready to argue only for Satan to growl. "You're really lucky I'm feeling merciful right now...Anyway, while you don't have useful powers, your willingness to move up in the world is something we need more of down here, which is the only reason I'm not having your foul mouthed ass executed."

Like with Stolas, Blitzø actually felt relief wash over him like a waterfall in Envy and looked about ready to make some crude remark, but the Sin of Wrath refused to let him get a word in.

"However, I can and will still punish you. So, Blitzo Buckzo, for the crime of using a Goetia's Grimoire for personal use and entering the human world without proper clearances, I hereby order the immediate freezing of all further operations of the organization known as Immediate Murder Professionals."

"THE FUCK YOU SAY?!"

"This will stand until you, Blitzo Buckzo, and your employees, both Moxxie Knolastname and Mildred "Millie" Knolastname acquire proper human disguises. In addition, all future contracts into the mortal realm will require approval from an appointed representative chosen by me and a detailed report will need to be completed and presented upon completion of every single contract from now on."

Blitz again looked ready to argue, but Stolas quickly covered his mouth to shut him up, while Moxxie actually looked shockingly thrilled at the request.

"Did you hear that, Millie?!" He asked, looking already a foot into a fountain of bliss. "Organization, detailed reports, accountability! We can finally run the company like a real business."

"Ehh…" Millie didn't seem to share his excitement. "I dunno, hon. Sounds like a lotta bullshit work to me."

Loona, meanwhile, was relieved that her dad wasn't gonna be executed, but so very frustrated that she was likely gonna have a lot more work to do from now on.

Fuck, am I gonna have to learn how to actually draft reports now? She groaned. I need a drink and a smoke.

However the 'celebration' was cut short by Satan clearing his throat.

"Oh, and one last thing, before I forget." He smirked a bit as he looked over the four that caused him such migraines, despite only knowing of them for literally hours. "You'll be expected to pay a fine of exactly Three Million Souls as well."

That last little detail actually hit the group worse than the threat of death.

"THREE MILLION!?" Blitz practically screamed, while Moxxie immediately began to have a panic attack as he quickly went over the numbers.

"Oh crumbs, the paperwork, the check balancing, WE'RE BROKE, Millie! How are we gonna pay that?!"

"Maybe we can head down to Lust and see if we have any luck there? You do seem to attract succubi pretty well." Millie joked, despite also feeling the weight of their financial burden.

Even the normally stoic Loona looked floored by the number, mentally wishing she had her phone in her paw to look up possible money making methods.

However, Naruto didn't give one shit about any of that, happy things were finally settled. Taking out his phone, he quickly texted back to the message he'd received earlier, and smiled when the respondent messaged him back.

With the matter resolved the courtroom quickly cleared out, Stolas and Loona dragging a positively livid Blitzo out the door, leaving Satan to sigh quietly as his gaze shifted back to Lucifer's throne, and his rage started to boil again.

"Yeah, this shit. This is ending now."

Quickly scrolling through the contacts on his phone, he landed on Snake-Faced Assclown and immediately pressed 'dial'. The phone rang for a few minutes, before a familiar voice started speaking.

"Hi, this is Lucifer. Big Bad Boss of Hell, Sin of Pride and All around awesome duck maker. Can't come to the phone right now, but unless your name is Charlie or Lilith kindly fuck right off."

Naruto's grip on his phone tightened as he slowly shrunk back to his human form, glaring angrily at the phone.

"Lucifer, it's Naruto, you know, Satan? The Sin of Wrath, Hell's Judge and the only fucking one of us that is officially sick of your sad sack bullshit? I agreed to help you run Hell, not to do it all on my fuckin' own while you squat like a little troll in your tower waiting for your bitch of a wife to call you back when we both know that's never gonna happen, and hide from your own daughter cause clearly Lilth took your balls with her after she ditched you." Naruto internally was grinning viciously. He'd been wanting to say this and so much more to the golden dick hole for centuries and he was officially done putting it off. "So, listen and listen very carefully. This whole dumping all your crap on me, it's over. Get your six winged ass in gear and start doing your FUCKING JOB! I can barely take care of my own Ring, much less all Seven and just found out about a titanic size level of crap happening under your watch. So kindly put down the ducks, have a nice little cry with Charlie, accept your wife has cucked and dumped you and ACT LIKE A KING ALREADY!"

With one last huff, he hung up and let off a breath, feeling a large degree of satisfaction in the mental image of Lucifer's face when he got that voicemail.

Taking a quick look at the wallpaper of his phone, his eyes shifted to the courtroom doors.

"Now, one last thing."

-Outside the Courtroom-

"THREE MILLIONS SOULS! Why doesn't he just plow me, Mox and Millie for three months. Least that would be less painful."

"Blitz, calm down, he could've killed you in there." Stolas pleaded with the still fuming imp as he and the others walked towards the exit of the courtroom. "And besides, it's not that much. I actually used to walk around with far more in my wallet."

"Your highness, not really helping I'm afraid." Moxxie muttered, mind still struggling to calculate how they'd get out of this financial black hole they were now in. "How on earth are we supposed to pay that and adhere to the court's demands?"

"Maybe you could start an OnlySins account Fatty." Loona snarked while scrolling through her phone, looking at the feed of the trial. Wow, they did...not have many fans. "Plenty of freaks out there willing to pay for how much junk you have in the trunk."

"I'M NOT FAT!" Moxxie practically frothed at the mouth, forcing Millie to hold him in place. Blitz simply ignored that.

"All I know is this fine is a total crock of shit and if it were up to me I'd.."

"You'd what exactly?"

All eyes of the I.M.P gang shifted to find Naruto starting about ten feet away from them, now transformed into his restricted, more human form. The sight of which sent Stolas's heart racing again, recognizing him instantly.

Sadly the rest of the group weren't so fortunate.

"Oh, and who's this fuckin' twink?! Come to laugh at the Imps that got put through the ringer by the great red jackass?" Blitz growled, not in the mood, while in the background Stolas silently mouthed to the others who exactly he was bad mouthing. Moxxie and Millie gaped and tried to correlate the Sin of Wrath with this humanoid.

"Uh, B-er, D-Dad? Maybe try not to piss someone else off today?" Loona asked, very concerned, even playing the dad card, hoping it would work. Sadly, it didn't.

"Sorry Loony, but Daddy's not in the fuckin' mood right now."

Naruto simply sighed. "And here I was hoping your time in the courtroom would teach you to pay a little more attention and think before shooting your mouth off."

"The fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"Blitzø!" Stolas practically shouted while pointing towards Naruto's chest…more specifically the pentagram proudly emblazoned on it. And upon taking a closer look at his attire, it quickly clicked.

"Oh...Ooooh, shit!" Blitzø winced.

Naruto sneered a little as he approached. "How about that, guess you can pay attention if you try."

"My lord. Please forgive him, he's merely tired from the trial and we weren't expecting to see you outside of your Demon Form." Stolas pleaded as Naruto approached.

"Relax, I'm not here to kill your little boy toy Stolas. Rather, I'm just here to resolve something and fulfill a little promise I made to someone very close to me."

Blitz, scared now but still curious piped up. "And…who might that be?"

He got his answer when the Sin of Wrath shoved his phone in his face, allowing Blitz and the others to see the wallpaper, all of them turning extremely pale at the image of Naruto/Satan in his human form holding a very happy looking Verosika Mayday in a loving embrace.

Blitz said nothing for a moment…"Would it help at all if I mentioned that I apologized?"

Pulling his phone away and pocketing, the Sin of Wrath cracked the knuckles in his left hand. "It does actually, V texted me during the trial, begging me to spare your sorry ass. She really is way more forgiving then I am."

Dreading what was coming, Blitz looked for support, only to find his loyal employees and Stolas giving him a lot of space.

"REALLY GUYS?!"

"Apologies, Blitz, but you did technically bring this on yourself." Stolas said matter of factly, fully away of the Imp's sorted affair with the pop star.

"Yeah Blitz. We love you and everything, but this is kind of something you have to handle on your own." Millie chimed, while Moxxie and Loona had whipped out their phones to record the whole thing.

"Relax Sir." Moxxie said with a bit of a smirk. "Just think of it like when you're in bed with Stolas and take it on the chin."

"Think maybe we can make some cash if we post this on Sinstagram?" Loona pondered making sure to record the entire affair.

"Well, thanks a lot!" Stolas turned to see Naruto winding up his left arm. "Any chance we can just talk about this instead?"

Naruto merely looked him in the eye. "Yeah, here's my fist talking to your face. Clench up, shithead!"

Immediately his left arm inflated and grew in size until it was transformed back into its demonic state, being several times larger, with the fist in particular being bigger than a train.

With a wind up, the massive fist was launched square at Blitzo, who in spite of the oncoming threat, still felt the need to get some kind of word in.

"Fuck me!"

A loud boom sounded as the I.M.P. CEO went flying down the court hallway, several teeth and a trail of blood following quickly behind him before he finally crashed into a nearby wall, embedded deep into it, groaning to signify he was still breathing.

"You better pay your damn fine Blitzø. Next time, I won't stop with one punch." Naruto huffed before giving a nod to the IMP Employees and striding towards the elevator to his Ring.

"Keep him in line, and we won't have a problem. Good luck."

As the Sin of Wrath left the court, the IMP gang ran over to pull their very injured boss out of the wall, not noticing Loona taking a couple snap shots of the humanoid Satan as he left.

Fuck…why do all the hot ones have to be taken?

-Wrath Ring: Satan's Castle-

Groaning and stretching his muscles out, Naruto pulled in his wings as he landed at the balcony of his massive mountain home, soaking in the more peaceful atmosphere and the sound of the waterfall of lava nearby.

He quickly pulled out his phone and texted Zenia, letting her know he was taking the rest of the day off and to let his clones handle things, saying he'd make more if she needed them, to which she agreed.

Opening the door to his bedroom he was greeted to the scent of perfume and a soft, sensuous voice entering his ears.

"Welcome home, big boy. Did my little dragon have a hard day?"

There, seated on the bed, naked from head to toe save for her black bra and panties covered in orange flames and his emblem near one of the nipples, her long white hair in a single ponytail, sat Verosika Mayday.

Hyper successful pop star, most wanted succubus in the Lust Ring, and girlfriend to the Sin of Wrath himself.

"Zenia told me you had a rough day. Said you were extra stressed out and needed some loosening up." The pop star puffed her chest out a little, allowing her massive mammaries to jiggle in a manner that'd give any virgin a raging boner and a heart attack at the same time. "So, I finished my rehearsal early and rushed over, and I'm all yours until next month. So what'd you say Mr. Wrathful?"

Extending her foot out and making a come hither gesture with her toe, she gave him the most alluring smile she could. "What say we break this bed, right here right now?"

Despite the erotic display, Naruto didn't react, instead he wordlessly walked over to the Succubus, yet kept his eyes trained only on her face and nothing more.

The pop star picked up on his lack of reaction and lowed her leg, looking a bit concerned. "Naruto…babe, you okay? This is the part where you're supposed to wreck me all over every wall of this room."

Again Naruto didn't answer as he closed the distance before, gently wrapping his arms around his girlfriend, and pulling her in tight, burying his face in her neck, sending the two falling onto the bed, yet he didn't release his hold, allowing the succubus to feel the warmth from his body cover her like a blanket.

"I missed you." He spoke softly, a far cry from the rage filled way he'd been speaking all day.

"I missed you too, you big goof." Verosika decided to drop the seductive act, knowing she didn't need to turn on the horny when around the Sin of Wrath. "But you're acting like you haven't seen me in weeks. I told you I'd be back tonight."

Naruto didn't answer at first, just enjoying the feeling of her in his arms, feeling all the rage, anger and bitterness melting away. "I'm just…happy you're here. Not having you around…it's hard to keep it together sometimes. Especially today."

Gently rubbing her cheek against his chest, Verosika nodded. "You mean Blitz. I saw the trial on TV….thanks for not being too hard on the guy. He's a prick, but he's trying to be better."

"I still can't believe you dated that little red skidmark." Naruto mumbled. "How the hell did you two stay together past a week?"

"Eh, I've been asking myself the same thing for a while." Verosika felt her hand gently trace the tattoo of Blitz's name on her arm, feeling the pain of when he dumped her still in her mind. "Guess, I just had a lousy taste in men back then."

That got Naruto to push back enough to look the succubus in the eye, a smirk on his face. "So what does that say with you dating me now?"

Verosika, however, laughed. "That even with my shitty luck I still managed to strike gold once?"

Smiling contently the Sin of Wrath gave the pop star a tender kiss on the lips, which she reciprocated. "Listen, I know you wanna maybe get freaky all over the place, but do you mind if we just keep it quiet tonight?" Naruto asked. "I just wanna enjoy having you home. You know, watch a couple movies, cuddle on the couch, eat a nice home cooked meal, and maybe we'll get frisky later?"

While most demons would probably balk at such a saccharine, tooth rotting romantic request, Verosika looked positively delighted at the idea. Yeah she enjoyed sex, and was gonna have some with the blonde dragon before the night was over, but the fact he wanted to just spend time with her, do simple, normal couple stuff? It made her heart flutter and burst.

Yeah, I definitely picked a winner this time. Suck it, Blitzo.

"Yeah." Giving her boyfriend another kiss she nodded. "Yeah, that sounds like a nice way to spend the day."

Naruto smiled as he held her against himself, happy to at least for the moment have something or someone to keep him grounded in spite of all the shit he had to put up with.

This job might suck ass, but I guess even in Hell, there's some perks after all.

-End-

Okay, time to clear up a few things since I know you have questions.

Explaining Things:

Naruto's Position as Satan: In canon Satan mainly acts as simply the Second in Command of Hell and it's judge, but plays fast and loose with the rules. However, we're told that the Wrath Ring produces most of the food in Hell, thus I wanted to touch on that, thus Naruto regularly communicates with the other Sins regarding food deliveries to each Ring, which adds stress on top of his other tasks. He also essentially provides security and police forces to the different rings to try and maintain some degree of order, but how much he can send depends entirely on how far said Sin is willing to cooperate. Bel for example is happy to let Naruto provide as much protection as possible, hence why Sloth is seemingly so peaceful while Mammon tries to charge him for Security, hence why it's crime ridden.

Why is Naruto Satan?: This is mainly just cause I think Satan is the coolest of the Seven Sins, though Wrath was probably one of the Sins Naruto most succumbed to outside of Envy and Gluttony. Envy was out since we know next to nothing about said ring and people would probably throttle me if I replaced Bee with him, so Wrath made the most sense. Plus the Ring is literally orange so that kind of played into it and the fact Satan is Hell's judge and in charge of it's laws, it just fit. Plus come on, Naruto as a giant Demon Dragon, how can people not think that's cool?

Naruto's Temper: I sort of had a headcannon that Lucifer in Helluva Boss and Hazbin, due both to his Pride and also the issues with his family essentially made him neglect all his responsibilities as ruler and effectively dump that burden on the next person IE Satan, which is the reason for his anger. Thus I played into that here by making Lucifer a bit more dickish compared to canon as he keeps Naruto almost constantly busy not unlike when he was Hokage in Boruto and this not only leaves Naruto almost constantly stressed and angry, but also causes him to neglect his own Ring hence why it's a bit more barren compared to the other Rings. It helps explain why Naruto is so wrathful compared to his human self.

Trial Compared to Canon: Thought how the Trial in Mastermind was handled was kind of weak. As explored here, Andrelphaus had all the evidence he needed to win the case fair and square as Blitz and Stolas did legit break Hell's laws multiple times and openly in front of everyone, thus with Naruto being a more logical, neutral and even compassionate judge, he'd never let Andrelphaus nonsense assassination plot fly and the Marquis would have to step up and present his case, showing he's not just hot air and intelligent as the show wants him to seem. Helps I went to Law School and watched my fair share of courtroom dramas and the like, so it was a bit easier to depict it.

Naruto x Verosika: Went with this pairing cause while Naruto x Loona is cool, there's tons of stories depicting them as a couple already. Octavia isn't really the type to show romantic interest, I hate Stella so she's out, writing for Bee is frankly too tricky for me and she has Vortex, Leviathan and Bel are flat characters, Charlie and Vaggie are a thing already and indifferent to Cherri Bomb. Also Millie is already married and not a fan of sabotaging canon couples like that. So Verosika made sense and her past with Blitz gave more reason for Naruto to lash out at Blitz.

Naruto's Wrath Castle: To anyone curious what Naruto's home in Hell looks like, look at Rusty Smith's home from American Dad. It's effectively a collection of buildings built into a large mountain, with a waterfall on the far side. Basically think of his home like that but a bit more demonic looking with the waterfall being a lavafall instead.

Zenia: She's effectively taken from the anime Level 1 Demon Lord, sharing pretty much the same design save for having red skin and wings due to being a succubus imp hybrid. Her main role is as Naruto's most loyal secretary and confidant, who manages his schedule and keeps him relatively calm, often providing him with either things to destroy or ramen to help cool his temper.

Anyway, hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. I should be updating The Avatar and the Revolutionary in another day or two, so look forward to it and again thanks to BonesBoy15 for his help here.

Also might start doing Oneshot story commissions for anyone interested. PM me and we can hopefully iron out the details. Let me know what you think.

Hope you enjoyed it. Till next time Agurra out.