[Azur Lane Bismarck]
My name is Bismarck, Battleship and flagship of Iron Blood.
Many years ago, I was tasked with sinking merchant convoys from the Eagle Union to starve out the Royal Isles. I failed, and I took a far better person than myself down.
Then ran away like a coward and hunted down like a dog.
I still hear the explosions.
I still hear the gunfire of her last battle. They haunt me every night. They don't so much as keep me awake, but they became the white noise that helped me sleep. It sounds morbid, but I got so used to hearing them it became natural to me.
It's strange. What I kept reliving the most was not my own sinking, but hers.
"Bismarck?"
The way I managed to hit her only once… and that was somehow enough… like I was some kind of… monster. A beast made of steel…
So much more was expected of me after that. Serving the Reich… destroying the Royal Navy… fighting my fellow Kansen… I never wanted any of it. It's in our nature as weapons to be forced into wars for the benefit of humans sat in offices…
What good is a weapon made to fight for humanity against Sirens when we are instead used to kill other humans, anyway?
If only I just defied them… fled to to the Royal Isles with my comrades… anything other than what I did to her…
"Bismarck?"
I sank on my first mission…
I could've saved Prinz Eugen, too…
My comrades all fell one by one to the Royal Navy and Eagle Union after I fell, including my dear sister…
I was unable to help them.
How can a leader of a whole faction be so useless…?
"Bismarck? Hello?" The voice of Hood calls, her hand on my wrist shaking me from my thoughts. I looked up from my now cold cup of coffee, still almost full.
"Are you alright? You spaced out for a moment again." Hood asked, her concern clearly visible.
"Um…. uh, ja… just… remembering…" I stuttered like some child who wasn't paying attention in class.
"Was it about our battle again?" Hood asked, concerned. "Are you still having… flashes?"
Feeling ashamed for allowing myself to spiral again, I looked down and apologised for my selfishness, "I'm sorry, Hood… I…"
It must've been raining that day and some rain must've leaked through the roof onto my face. Because it certainly wasn't anything else.
"You're crying… Bismarck, it's not your fault."
I shook my head and wiped what were certainly not tears from my face. This woman… I felt like her efforts were wasted on me. "So you say… but we both know it very much is. I didn't have to obey the order to fire on you. I didn't know my own power because I was too irresponsible to test it first."
"Bis…"
"I only wanted to damage you so you'd retreat… I… I never meant to kill you…"
"Bismarck, my deck armour wasn't-"
I held up my hand to cut her off. I wasn't about to let her take any blame for what I had done to her. The way her hull… just exploded… the blast was so violent it cracked her whole hull in two and threw a heavy main turret high into the air.
Although I wasn't in the same radio frequency as her, I could practically hear her agonising scream from my own ship.
Verdammt… I was spiralling yet again. She moved to try and comfort me. I decided I wasn't worthy of that from her and spoke, "I appreciate you trying to help me, Hood. But… don't waste your time with me. It's best if we just remain allies. You really don't want to further associate yourself with someone like me." I decided.
Hood's grip on my wrist shifted to my hand. She replied, "No, I refuse to give up on you, Bismarck. Your power was misused. You were misguided. Azur Lane is your chance to do right. I know Wales hasn't fully forgiven you and you've had a few spats with her recently, but I know she'll come around eventually. Please stay and let me help you through this."
How could I even look her in the eye? I felt disgusted with myself for even thinking I could truly be forgiven. I was the pride of a man who sent millions of innocent people to their deaths simply just for being who they were. What kind of monster do you have to be to obey someone like that?
Without warning, I made yet another selfish decision, thinking it was selfless. I decided to save her the time and effort and stood up. "Thank you for the coffee, even if I wasted that, as well…" I left without a further word. Even now I know that wasn't a good choice. She looked so worried when I looked back at her while I closed the door. I still beat myself up for that.
Perhaps that's why I got more dirty looks from the Royals afterwards…
Hood had been trying to make friends with me ever since Azur Lane reabsorbed the Crimson Axis. While I was content to just stay with my faction and continue leading them to glory for the Kommandant, and away from any Royals, Hood had tried make peace with me. Wether out of genuine compassion or merely to cement relations between us and the Royal Navy, I wasn't so sure.
Just then, I got an alert on my phone. Checking it, I saw that the Kommandant had called me to a sortie. Speak of the devil.
I made my way to the briefing room and I saw that my aide, my guardian and I were the only ones present.
"Frau Eugen." I nodded to her.
"Lord Bismarck." She simply smiled back, leaning backwards with her hands behind her head and feet on the table, as carefree as ever.
"Hallo, Parzival." I smiled at the little blue-haired U-Boat, U-556. She had sworn to protect me at all times she's able to.
"Guten Morgen, Lord Bismarck!" She said as she adorably sprang to her feet and saluted, not a care in the world. I saluted her back and sat her back down in her seat. Her feet swung back and forth as they didn't touch the floor when she sat in it.
"Kommandant. You called?" I asked, turning my attention to the man in charge.
The grizzled Royal Navy officer took a puff of smoke from his cigar and responded, "That's right. We have reports of a strange anomaly in the Denmark Strait."
Just the mention of that place caused yet another flash in my mind. The feeling of my eardrums bursting what I fired my guns to scare off Norfolk and Suffolk.
U-556 squeezed my hand and brought me back to the present. The Kommandant asked, "Are you paying attention, Bismarck?"
"Ja. My apologies. Please continue." I responded. The old man grunted and pointed to the location in question on a map of the NA Ocean.
"It may just be nothing," He went on, "but if it is something, we can't afford to ignore it. The Sirens have been idle for too long and this may very well be their doing. I need you three to scout it out. Knowing your history, you'll have the most experience there. Whatever it is, some freak weather pattern or a Siren force, I need you to report it. If it's something dangerous, I want you both to retreat ASAP and wait for reinforcements. You'll be taking U-556 here as I'm aware she's sworn to protect you on every mission."
"Understood." I replied dutifully, if a little reluctantly.
"What she said." Eugen added, less than dutifully and for more reluctantly.
"Don't worry, Lord Bismarck! You'll have me with you the whole way this time! And I have all my torpedoes!"
Parzival could only watch when I was sunk. She had Ark Royal in her sights and would've prevented her destroying my rudders, but she had no torpedoes due to sinking convoys. She hid it well, but I could tell she still blamed herself for that.
Luckily, the Kommandant seemed to not even notice our tones of voice. Of course he didn't.
The Kommandant was rather… senile. He was the type to sit at his desk all day and give us missions. The bare minimum of his job. He never really cared for getting to know us. He put just enough effort in to keep his rank, yet was always furious when he got passed over for promotions. He probably only gave is this job as Naval HQ was breathing down his neck about it.
Not even the goody two-shoes Head Maid Belfast was fond of him, though it was always humorous when Sheffield told him off for his laziness. He could never get a word in when she berated him.
Funnily enough, from what I've heard, he's the direct opposite to the much younger, more caring Kommandant of the Eagle Union and Sakura Empire Kansen at the Pearl Harbor Base…
Anyway, the Kommandant also was too ignorant to learn that although physically stronger and far more durable, Kansen can receive mental trauma just as easily as humans. He didn't really care for our history there. He just wanted us there because we knew the Denmark Strait better than most Kansen on base. If U-556 wasn't so adamant about going with me, he probably wouldn't have sent her as well.
"Jawohl." We all replied in unison. Eugen got up and left first. I could sense the boredom in her attitude. Parzival stayed by my side.
We stopped on the docks and produced our vessels. Manjuus loaded supplies for us onto them. My aide was whistling Erika and seemed to not have a care in the world, a stark contrast to my own demeanour. I stopped her and asked, "Eugen, are you taking this mission seriously?"
"Why of course, Lord Bismarck, it's not like we're being sent to the one place we both still have nightmares about just to look at some strange clouds or something. Why would I ever not take something so seriously?" She sarcastically asked. Her voice starting to tremble at the end while the look in her eyes shifted.
"Run along, Parzival. Get ready to depart, ja?"
"Jawohl, Lord Bismarck!" U-556 nodded as she ran off to her Submarine. I looked at my old friend and became worried.
"Eugen… you still have them, too?" I asked how that Parzival was out of earshot.
She let her guard down for a moment. As far as I knew, only I have ever seen her like that. She looked insecure and looked down while gripping her elbow. She muttered, "…Ja… I woke up screaming last week… Hipper thought I was being attacked or something and broke down my door… hehe…"
"Was it… Crossroads?" I asked carefully.
"Nein… I was… reliving hearing about your sinking after arriving in Brest… I remember even Scharnhorst being shaken by my screams…"
I pulled Eugen into a hug. She didn't try to fight it.
"I too have been losing sleep. I suspect it's increasing the amount of memories that kept forcing their way into the forefront of my mind."
"It's not hindering your ability to lead us… is it?"
"I try not to let it. I can't afford to. Our comrades are counting on me to push it down and not let it affect me."
"Why not talk to someone? If not me, then perhaps Hood? She's always willing to talk to you." Eugen asked, looking up at me.
"I can't talk to her about it. I doubt the last thing she'd want to hear is how I felt when I sank her." I admitted.
"If you say so…" as if she hadn't just opened up to me, her demeanour quickly shifted and her confident mask slipped back on. She stepped away from me and smirked, "Speaking of whom, it looks like your new Freundin is here~" while looking behind me.
"Was?" I spun around and there she stood. Once again trying to speak with me. "Hood?"
"Is it just the three of you going out?" The Royal asked, surprised. The usual doctrine is to have at least 2 ships in a fleet to fill the Main Fleet and Vanguard Fleet roles, but the Kommandant usually had at least 6 in a fleet, three in each role. More to make sure at least one of us survives and not render the mission isn't a complete failure rather than ensure we're all safe.
"It's just an investigation." I tried to explain.
Eugen casually added, "We're being sent to look at some lighting strikes or something. Herr Kommandant is getting paranoid, in my opinion. Apparently this is enough of a mission to send Lord Bismarck and I on." She shrugged at the last part.
"Isn't anyone else going?" The concerned Royal asked.
"It's just the two of us and U-556 in this scout fleet." I replied, heavily implying in my tone that the three of us are enough.
Unfortunately, she either didn't take the hint or just ignored it.
"Then I'm coming with you. The Commander has a right to be paranoid. The Sirens haven't tried anything for months and this could be trap." Hood insisted.
"Was? Nein! I-"
"I'm not taking 'nein' for an answer, Bismarck. You need someone to watch your back. I have a very bad feeling about this." Hood assorted, to my annoyance.
I tried to explain, "Hood, I already have Eugen and Parzival with me. They'll both be there to defend me-"
"Because that worked so bloody well last time, didn't it?" A more hostile voice interrupted. It was then that Prince of Wales emerged from behind Hood. I must not have seen her approaching until then.
Wether Eugen saw her or not, she still hasn't told me.
"Excuse me?" I retorted.
Wales explained, "As soon as you got injured from killing Lady Hood, your little friend there buggered off soon after I had to retreat with her Cubes! As for the little one, she wasted all her bloody torpedoes sinking defenceless merchant ships! You really trust those two to guard you again after that?"
When I was about to defend them both, Eugen suddenly stormed up to her with a side of her that none of us had ever seen from her. If U-556 were present, she probably would've hidden behind me.
Grabbing the golden chains across Wales' chest and dragging down a little so their noses were almost touching, Eugen simply asked, "Are you done?" In a scarily calm tone, "Or would you prefer to reenact your miserable failure? We're going back the Strait so it would be very immersive. Don't forget the most amount of damage you did to me was scratch my paintwork while Lord Bismarck put a shell into your friend's magazine. Don't lecture me on running away as if you didn't do it first, and I was ordered to leave."
The silence was deafening. They stood there, glaring at each other for five long minutes. When Wales was unable to reply, Eugen silently pushed her back and walked off to go board her ship without another word.
Speechless, Wales stared at her ship as a rather irate Hood pulled her aside for a few words, out of earshot of myself. Not caring for eavesdropping on them, I just walked away and boarded my own ship.
I had never seen that level of silent anger from Eugen before. She always retorted with snarky quips. Not this time.
Could she have been as haunted by Rheinübung as I? Was it being amplified by the prospect of returning there? I had decided to just focus on the mission there and then.
Mein Gott… I should've just spoken to her right after. Some leader I am…
Anyway… not long after reaching my bridge, the hulls of Hood and Wales appeared alongside us. Not sure at the time how the Kommandant would react, I shrugged and decided that if we got in trouble, the blame was on them.
After we set off, I looked ahead and saw U-556 doing her duty and sailing off ahead with her sonar. I glanced over at the hull of my dear friend Eugen. Unsure of wether I should speak with her, I sighed and held off for a while longer.
A lot of people think that a simple talk will cure feelings like what I have. They say to cheer up and remind us of our achievements and what we have to be happy about. It's not always as easy as that. No one simple talk will do much to help. It never helped me, no matter many times Hood tried. More and more, I lost the ability to find any joy in the things I used to love doing. I just had this constant voice in my head that told me I don't deserve to feel anything from people's attempts to say I matter and that people love me. The voice deep down, saying that they're not genuine. It's hard to ignore something that won't just shut the fuck up.
I just didn't believe I was worthy of compassion when there are so many other ships at the base with far more traumatic histories, including every one of the other ships in our little fleet.
If how Eugen was acting was any indication, she was in a similar situation. I doubted a talk with her would do anything beneficial and maybe come off as patronising.
I looked to the other side and saw Hood sailing alongside me. A strange feeling, but I have to admit it was not one I was willing to complain about.
I couldn't help but smile a little to myself…
[Kancolle Bismarck]
I walked down the main street of the Naval District with my shorter friend, dressed in a similar grey outfit to me with matching hats.
"Bismarck, why do you think we've been called, of all ships?" My cute companion asked. She looks a lot like me, so much so we look like sisters, although my real sister was unfortunately never brought into the Kanmusu Program, and neither were any of hers.
Prinz, Graf Spee and the two U-Boats are enough for me, though. I smiled and responded, "I'm not sure, Prinz. I suppose we'll know when we get there."
Prinz skipped ahead and performed an admirable twirl, "Oh! Perhaps it's an upgrade? Or a special mission only we can do? Ooh! Maybe we're visiting Germany again?"
Her innocence melted my heart. "Hehe. I'm sure we'll find out in a minute." I assured her. "Secretary Ship Nagato is nothing if not thorough."
Speaking of whom, the tall, red-eyed Battleship nodded to us along with her more gentle hazel-eyed sister Mutsu as we stopped at the docks and saluted.
Nagato smiled so rarely, Mutsu usually did it for her.
They both returned the gesture and Nagato began, "Bismarck and Prinz Eugen. The Admiral has received reports of anomalies appearing in the Denmark Strait. We suspect it is due to Abyssal interference. If the Deep Sea Fleet is indeed behind this, we need you and the rest of the Kriegsmarine Kanmusu to drive them away. You're free to use whatever methods you require."
Prinz asked, "Can't we take some more shipgirls with us, Frau Nagato?" For context, there really weren't many Krigsmarine ships that took to the Kanmusu Program.
"I'm afraid not." Nagato answered, "The Admiral needs all other members of the Fleet to repel an incoming Abyssal invasion fleet on course to this base. If they manage to attack Britain or Germany while we're busy here, it could cause human morale to drop and secure the Abyssals a foothold on land. The Royal Mavy may also lose faith in the Naval District and pull their Kanmusu from our command, weakening us. We must not allow that. Is that understood?"
We both saluted again and confirmed, "Jawohl!"
There weren't many British ships in the Kanmusu Program either, but we needed all the help we could get.
Nagato saluted again and nodded, "Good. Destroyer Division 6 have prepared your equipment. Get ready, brief the other members of your group for the mission and deploy ASAP."
"Good luck, girls!" Mutsu cheered. Now that I think back on it… was she holding a squirrel?
We immediately gathered our fellow German Kanmusu. Graf Zeppelin, Z1, Z3, U-511, and Shinyou.
The last one is technically Japanese, but she was converted from the Scharnhorst, a German cruise liner, so Nagato allowed her to stay with us.
Anyhow, we got everything we needed together, Prinz made us some quick snacks and we set sail on our riggings.
When we both joined the Naval District years ago, we had heard the Fleet Girls possessed the strength of superheroes. After joining, we saw that it was true, but only when we were given equipment as part of the Kanmusu Project, which imbued us with the souls of warships sunk long ago. In a sense, we became them. Inherited their abilities in the form of superhuman abilities and miniature versions of their weapons on our bodies.
Sounds quite strange to those uninitiated, but not much else is really known. It matters not, as now we can finally fight against the aliens that have driven humanity from the seas. Speaking of which, we were now underway.
We'll reclaim our oceans, no matter the cost…