Chapter 3:
You'd think we're in district 13 from how dystopian this 'family dinner' is. Really It's more like more of a military base camp cafeteria.
I walked up to the winding line of stiffly standing cameramen holding large grey trays, their faces expressionless because well….. But their tensed mood was visible from the way their fingers dug into the tray holders, as their feet shuffled along the straight path. A cameraman sat at the end of the line, handing out identical servings of stale-looking quiche with stray bits of spinach and a side of water. Each domino out of the stack of hungry individuals gruffly collected their food and slid over to one of those metal picnic tables filled with other cameramen, who mostly ate in silence with the occasional tidbit of chatter.
Before I knew it, the lunch-cameraman silently slid me my dinner and gestured for me to go, as I mouthed a quick thanks, which left her face a contortion of confusion and gratitude. I blankly searched for a spot to sit, most tables being about ninety percent full, but Radio man gestured in a stoic wave for me to join him, at his lonely corner, avoided like Diddy at a prison. I slowly sat down across him, as I unwrapped my cutlery while he awkwardly smiled.
"So, I guess we're best friends now" he grumbled in a deadpan voice "And you're the only one to talk to, so tell me something I guess?"
Has he ever felt the warmth of sunlight? Felt the sensation of grass?
"Such as" I asked, somehow unsarcastically.
"What made you want to become a pro hero maybe?" he replied.
"Uhh I'm trying to become a pro hero, and I know this sounds selfish, but I want to help my parents get rich" I replied nervously "What do you want to do with your life?"
"I want to get out of here the moment I turn eighteen, then I'm becoming a musician" he chucked "Cuz like the head!"
Dang. So funny.
"And the moment I get rich, I want to get away even further and buy a property in Egypt."
"Why Egypt?" I replied. Why Horikoshi? Why-Egypt ? That's so specific.
"The dry climate will stop my radio from getting damaged" he paused "And It's amazing what they do for you there" .
"Dinner over! Leave all non-personal belongings except I-pads at your tables and leave the room immediately!" a voice boomed. Everyone swiftly stood up as they walked towards the residence chambers, the crowd moving calmly and evenly as If they rehearsed it. They probably did. The deathly silence was swiftly broken by Radio who muttered something about everyone staring, as I replied with a swift nod. Horikoshi, this better not be a cringey romance where it's like a Deku or this guy - ahh thing.
I was exhausted from the long day, first beginning with our typically emo teacher cheerfully wishing my luck before dropping me off at the military-base-like agency while listening to Melanie Martinez. Then she got to listen to her new unofficial buddy explain the reason we're fighting a horde of toilet supervillains followed by hours of battle training and dinner somehow more pathetic than my parent's salaries. And now I need to check my new ipad for what to do tomorrow. The ipad is coiled in a plethora of wires winding around it's silver exterior, barley held in by a black case-box thing with a grip below it, allowing me to hold the ipad whilst checking her duties and apparently summon a ton of explosives, which by the way like - what can I even use them for? Horikoshi, like - seriously? What is the plot even about at this point? Or are you doing pot? Although I should be grateful, at least I'm not a side character or some maid-outfit hero.
Anyways before this internal monologue I was like - about to check what I have to do tomorrow right? I slowly clicked the home button as I swerved from the walking horde of cameramen into my dorm, opening the cool silver handle as I stared at the screen while I waited for the probably unrealistically high amount of data loaded into the ipad. You know, so far this has been one of the most mentally disturbed comedic relief adventures, like I mean, I'm fighting a literal toilet army. So would it make sense to sacrifice some of the story's believability, or how absorbed the fans are or something for comedic gags? Like would It even be surprising if the wallpaper was two toilets kissing or something? Or..
I paused for a moment, my eyes widening as her mouth quivered in a contortion of emotion.
What If Horocoshi enjoys doing this to me? What is this isn't even Horocoshi, so here I am becoming a brain rot version of Saiki K instead of being sexualized? WH-H-AT?
The realization flew towards me like a massive plane, collapsing my pair of thin, tower-like legs as tears began to flow out of my not-blue orbs as my sticky skin began to shiver. Then I'll stay strong. I'll take this role with pride and dignity. I'll do this for my happy ending. For my parents, for myself, for women in media to finally have hope of having a somewhat okay representation. Skibidi toilet, watch the fuck out!
I stood up in a flurry of adrenaline and shock as I took my ipad, resolve pumping through my veins as I opened tomorrow's timetable, as this - this- I can finally .. matter? Make me - or my parents - or Horikoshi or whoever took me to the cameramen agency - Proud?
The ebony white screen showed a timetable, carefully articulated rows of schedule, as I swiped sideways until I reached tomorrow, zooming into the outline of the day, where in bold arial writing it writes ' Train with Radio - Pick up from school at 1 pm, St. Alpha's shinto college.'