The mud had frozen underfoot in the frost. It had numbed the soles of Tiger Lily's feet as she trekked to the assigned meeting place, beneath the spreading oak where she and Rob had first kissed. She'd no doubt that he would be there, regardless of what Sango warned her about Rob abandoning her if they ever shared a bed. They met with the same awkwardness shared by most tweens seeing each other for the first time after a tryst. The night before had been sweet and awkward and clumsy. Not unpleasant, but not exactly what she had expected either.
They sat side by side, their backs leaning against the tree trunk, facing outwards, not looking directly at each other. Tiger Lily's longbow rested against the tree beside her. He hadn't asked her to bring it, but she had felt like doing so. Her bow was a friend and it gave her comfort to have it near. Rob's arms were folded over his chest as though to protect himself. It was early evening and mist swirled around the village, masking the smoke and felled trees. It was almost like everything was normal and they weren't living in one of the worst times ever recorded in the Shire.
"What happens now?" Tiger Lily said.
A shiver went down her spine as he brushed a lock of hair off her neck, his rough fingertips making contact with her sensitive skin. "If I was being a proper gentlehobbit, I guess I ought to wed you."
The spell was broken. All uncertainty left her as she grimaced, no doubt in her mind on this particular point. "Don't do that."
"No?"
"No." She turned her eyes down, painstakingly going over the weave of her skirt, the way every thread wound over and under the others until you couldn't follow a single one anymore. "Sorry for asking. I thought I'd feel… I don't know. Satisfied? But I don't."
"Cheers for that."
"No, no, that's not what I meant." She twisted around to face him, eager that he should understand she hadn't intended it as a slight. "I just thought that, I don't know, like it was some great secret and once it happened, the world would open up and I'd be completely different. But everything's just the same as it was before."
"Not sure there's anything that can do all that," he said.
"Have you been with other lasses?"
Rob plucked a grass blade and started twirling it in his fingers. "Aye."
"Who?"
"Not telling you that," he said, not looking up as he tore the grass into small pieces.
"Why?"
"Protecting their modesty," he mumbled.
Tiger Lily hooked a finger over his top button. Some part of her still needed to know that he was real and he was here, physically. He looked at her with fond bemusement. Obviously he wouldn't tell her. Everything was unsure except him.
"You'll be my undoing," she said.
"Hope not."
"Maybe I want to be undone."
"You shouldn't," he said. "That's too much for me to worry about."
"I don't want to worry you."
"I don't reckon you can care about anyone without worrying a bit."
She froze. The thought that he cared about her so soon after they'd started seeing each other again, and that he had cared about her all the way through their separation, struck her with guilt. She had left him so abruptly and all because…
Propelled by her need to make things right, she stated to cover his face with kisses.
He laughed, deep and rumbling and long-missed. His grin cast deep laughing lines around his eyes. "What's that for?" he said.
"For being you."
A half-smile tugged at his mouth. "You must care a lot," he said, fluffing out her hair. "For how much you worry about everything."
Someone other than herself making such a deeply-piercing observation left her with severe discomfort. She shifted away from him slightly, trying to think of a way to direct the conversation elsewhere.
"I went up to Overhill today. Sango was supposed to be taking me to meet one of his male friends tomorrow and I had to give him an excuse as to why I didn't want to go anymore. I didn't tell him it was because I've got a much better lad now."
She could tell Rob disapproved. Of course he did. Worried that he was judging her for moving on so quickly after their separation she added, "Sango knew I was sad and wanted to help. I don't like any of his friends, they're all asses."
He snickered. "That's a bit strong for you. They must be bad."
"You've corrupted me," she said dryly. Standing up she bent her longbow to slide the string into place. "Shall we go?"
"What're you hunting?"
"Whatever you like. And as much as you need, though I can't promise it'll be fast, I'm a bit out of practice."
She pulled on his hand to get him up, squeezing his fingers to coax him into following her.
She would make him smile a hundred times a day if she could. It didn't matter that she'd left him because she was back. And the reasons for her coming back didn't matter either because she would be affectionate enough that he would know he was wanted. So there was no reason for her to feel guilty. None at all.
After dinner Meg and her mother went to Widow Stabler's smial, staying in stark silence the whole way.
Mrs Stabler had had another fall last week, and been abed ever since, with the various wives and daughters of East Warren Lane taking a vigil by her bedside. Meg wasn't sure how aware Mrs Stabler was of what was going on in the Shire at large. She also wasn't sure what level of understanding would be for the best. Her sons had been sent for, but neither had arrived. Whether it was disruption to the postal service or trouble getting through the roads remained only speculation.
When Meg and Mrs Delver entered Widow Stabler's smial they found Mrs Budd at the kitchen table, waiting for the kettle to boil and absently brushing down the curls of her baby, which was lying on the table and trying to eat its own foot. Her son Cafred was playing with a pair of wooden horses in the corner.
"How's she been today?" Mrs Delver said.
"Sleeping mostly," Mrs Budd said before taking a shaking sigh. "The pellar dropped by earlier. She thinks it'll be tonight."
"Oh."
"Am I all right to head off?" she said, scooping the baby up onto her shoulder. "I need to get dinner started."
"You run on. This ain't the place for little'uns."
"The pellar said she'd be back later," Mrs Budd said, grabbing Cafred's hand to pull him from the room.
Mrs Delver started laboriously laying out the things for tea. She was being unnervingly calm.
"Is there any point in doing that, Mum?" Meg said.
"It'll be a long evening. We'll need something to keep us going. Why don't you make the tea while I sit with her? She shouldn't be alone."
Once she'd been left by herself, Meg busied herself with readying the tea. By the time she was finished her mind had gone through the storm of grief and anger and shock and come out the other side into an uneasy calm.
There was a soft scratching against the door to the larder. Expecting to see a mouse, Meg was surprised when she turned around and saw Widow Stabler's cat winding around the partially-open door. It flinched when it realised it had been spotted, freezing in place and staring at her with big eyes.
"You never did like little'uns, did you?" Meg said.
The cat said "Mrrp," as its muscles melted into liquid. It slunk from the room to do whatever cats do when they're not being observed.
Meg took a breath to steady herself before carrying the fully-laden tea tray through to Widow Stabler's bedroom, trying not to let the cups clink. Mrs Stabler was very pale, her grey hair spread out over her pillow like swirling mercury. Her eyes were closed, but her shallow breathing showed she was still alive, for the time being.
"Is she really that bad?" said Meg.
"I can't say myself. We'll trust the pellar, eh?"
Mrs Delver submerged a clean handkerchief into one of the cups and gently pressed it to Mrs Stabler's lips.
"You don't have to stay, Meg," she said. "I'll be all right. I've been at death beds before."
"I want to," Meg said, sitting on a small footstall in the corner of the room.
"I won't tell you to stay," Mrs Delver said. "But I won't tell you to leave either."
Meg said nothing but mentally settled herself further into her spot. She had seen births before; she had assisted in her mother's confinements since she was fifteen. They had been loud and bloody and filled with the acute fear that she might lose her mother. This was different. Not the knife edge of being unsure of the future but the gentle wait for what was certain to come.
And so she waited.
Sango's parents were blessedly absent when Tiger Lily arrived at The Rookery. What was a little surprising, however, was that he was entertaining his cousin Balbus. Last Tiger Lily had heard, he was visiting the other Boffins in the Yale.
"I'll just tell the young masters you're here," the maid said as she stepped aside to let Tiger Lily in.
"No need. I'm not staying."
The maid left, Tiger Lily's presence in the smial being so common that ordinary rules for guests didn't apply. The door to the parlour was left ajar so that Tiger Lily could hear Sango and his cousin talking inside. She paced up and down while she gathered enough courage to interrupt them, and started to follow the thread of the conversation.
It didn't make much sense to her, and it seemed out of character for her Sango. It wasn't the type of conversation he had.
"It's not the sort of thing I would want to get involved with," he was saying, his voice in its usual gentle cadence.
"With respect, Rowley," Balbus said, "it's not really about what you want."
"I wasn't talking about me specifically—I mean, not just me—I was talking about anyone. You especially."
"I wanted to join but Folco says I'm too young."
"He's still implicating you by using you as a messenger."
"He doesn't trust the Post Service. Now that the Mayor's gone it's probably in Lotho's power, but he's given me a code I can use to write back to him. What should I tell him?"
"It's just… all a bit drastic."
"And what Pimple's doing isn't?" Balbus said. "He's rebelled against the Thain, the Shire's been torn in half!"
"I know that, but…" Even though he was obscured by the door, Tiger Lily could picture Sango's face as he said this. Uncertainty, like he was writing a poem but couldn't quite find the right word. "Everything may yet come right on its own. It has to, doesn't it? What Folco's suggesting would change things irreparably." He paused, and then continued in a lighter tone, "I don't really understand why he's being so insistent, he's never had that much patience with me."
"Because he's already got Tosto on board and you're next. Out of the Boffins there's only you Rico, Folco, Tosto and Jayco who can do anything."
"Be that as it may, I don't appreciate Folco trying to drag me into his little scheme."
"I'll tell him you called it that."
There was the rustle of movement from inside the parlour. "I don't have anything more to say on the subject. Give my love to your mother."
"You can't just pretend none of this is happening. You have a duty to—"
Sango opened the door and started when he saw Tiger Lily.
"Hello, Miss Took," he said, much louder than was necessary. "How lovely to see you."
There was a clatter from inside and moments later Balbus appeared beside Sango in the doorway. He blinked suspiciously. "Were you listening to us?"
"Oh, no," she said, trying to sound as innocent as possible. "I've only just arrived."
"Miss Took was raised better than you. She doesn't partake in intrigue," Sango said, turning her about to face the front door. "But much as I enjoy your company, cousin, I have a more pressing social engagement."
"Rowley…" Balbus groaned as Sango pulled his coat on.
"One of the maids will see you out," Sango said just as he and Tiger Lily left for the outside.
"When did Balbus return from the Yale?" she said as they walked around the house to the stables.
"Last night. I slightly preferred it when he was there."
"Did he find the Boffins well?"
"Well enough in the circumstances. They had some trouble on the road back but they made it home safely."
"Good." She hesitated, watching Sango saddle his pony before continuing. "How was your Uncle Vigo?"
"As usual, I think."
"And Folco?"
"Fine." He said this in a tone too clipped for this to be true.
"He was friends with Frodo Baggins, wasn't he? The disappearance must have been hard for him."
"I assume so." He held out a hand to help her onto her pony. "Here."
"Thank you," she said, accepting his help in mounting Posy.
Sango mounted his own pony and brought it to a leisurely walk, and Tiger Lily nudged Posy into a plod so she could ride alongside him.
"I trust you when you say you didn't hear our conversation so I won't be talking any more about Folco," Sango said, giving her a look that said he damn well knew she had heard it but wasn't going to admit it out loud until she did.
"I didn't understand it really," Tiger Lily said. "What does Falco want you to do?"
"Some nonsense. I won't waste your time with it."
"We have to talk about something on the way to the village."
"I'm surprised you came up to Overhill to meet me," he said, adjusting his grip on the reins. "I thought we were going to meet in Bywater."
"I wanted to check that you'd had a chance to speak to Jesco Brownlock."
"I did," Sango's voice was tight and considered. "He wasn't very happy about the short notice, but he understood that you were having troubles. He sends his regrets."
"I doubt that," she said laughingly. "Was he not relieved at being spared my company?"
"Spared?" Sango said. "'Spared' is entirely the wrong word."
"So he wasn't relieved?"
"He…" Sango sighed. "He wasn't the one for you."
"Is 'not the one for you' a euphemism for him being awful?"
"That's a bit harsh," Sango said, riding slightly behind her down onto the main road. "I mean, he was perfectly willing to overlook you being a Took. I don't know why you've taken against him so much."
"I just think you're not at your best when you're around him," Tiger Lily said. She sighed and shook her hair out. "And it's too soon after the incident with Master Delver."
This was true. Technically true. It had been too soon after the separation that she'd agreed to see other, more suitable lads. Though so far they had only proved to be more ass-headed; entitled and self-assured in a way that made them wholly unappealing. She wasn't sure what she'd been thinking of at the time. She'd been too deep in her own feelings.
"And maybe I don't want someone who's willing to overlook my family," she said. "If they want to join it they need to regard it with the same respect I regard theirs."
Sango sighed. "You deserve that, of course. But I think it might be easier to find someone willing to overlook it initially, who can then come to love them as they love you."
She didn't have the energy to keep arguing the point, and it was moot now anyway. Tiger Lily didn't bring it up as they continued on through Hobbiton and Bywater, until eventually they brought their ponies to a halt outside the wheelwrights: Hobble & Son & Daughters. The plan had been for Sango and Lavender to accompany Tiger Lily and Jesco, each couple ensuring the propriety of the other. Now that plan had fallen through, and Tiger Lily was left with the job of acting as Sango and Lavender's chaperone.
Sango went to the door while Tiger Lily dismounted, straining to see over his shoulder and get a glimpse of Lavender. They hadn't seen each other since before Yuletide and Tiger Lily was looking forward to spending the evening in her company. She felt a jolt of excitement upon seeing Lavender leave the house. She was wearing an orange and white dress that made her stand out in the grey winter world, not a popular colour for Hobbits, but one that suited Lavender.
"Hello, Miss Hobble!" she said. "It's lovely to see you."
Lavender smiled wearily at her. "And you, lass."
Tiger Lily wasn't entirely sure if she meant it. As the three of them started along the way to The Green Dragon Tiger Lily did her best to engage the other two in light conversation.
"It's been too long since I've seen you, Miss Hobble."
"It's been hard meeting up anywhere," Lavender said. "You never know when you're actually safe. The snow didn't help neither."
"That's true. Although without the snow we wouldn't have been able to go on the sledging trip. It's a shame you couldn't come to that."
"The what?"
"The sledging trip. Sango took us all sledging last week…" Tiger Lily trailed off, starting to realise she had done something wrong.
Lavender was looking stonily at Sango, "He took all of us, did he? Who did he take?"
"Uh… me, my cousin Opal, her betrothed, Abelia and Monno Grubb…"
Lavender's glare grew harder.
Sango didn't react particularly to this. "It was during the day, you had your work," he said.
"You could have gone in the evening."
"I thought you didn't like my friends."
"There's a difference atween watching a load of lads get drunk and going out to do something with a mix of lads and lasses."
"I don't see how. And I can see my friends without you."
"I know that. But don't think I've not noticed you only let me around your friends when you're all drinking."
"And what does that mean?"
"Nothing. If you don't think I'm respectable enough to be around you all when you're sober that's your business."
"Excuse me—!"
"Sorry," Tiger Lily said. "I didn't know… I shouldn't have brought it up."
"No. I'm glad you did," Lavender said, though she didn't sound it.
The rest of the journey passed in uneasy silence, Tiger Lily feeling the uncomfortable pressure of being a third party where she wasn't welcome. The problem was she wasn't allowed to leave.
As soon as they arrived at The Green Dragon it was apparent that something was amiss. There were several hobbits gathered around the front of the inn, but there was a general air of confusion.
The door to the inn was shut and the windows were smashed. It was far too early in the day for it to be closed and the insides were dark and quiet.
Sango looked through the broken remains of the window pane. "What's happened?"
"There's some writing on the door," Lavender said.
"What does it say?"
She glared at him. He was so preoccupied with trying to look inside that he didn't notice or remember that Lavender couldn't read. Tiger Lily quickly moved to get a better look at the door before an argument began. There was a paper note pinned to it, and she read it out loud to divert attention away from Sango's blunder.
"Due to the disorderly conduct of its patrons, and in order to stop the spread of idleness, this establishment has been closed for the betterment of the people of Bywater and Hobbiton: by the order of the Chief Shirriff."
"Idleness…?" Lavender said.
"That can't be right," Sango said, rushing to join the Tiger Lily by the door. "Lotho liked a drink as much as anyone and Mr Tavenner was always quick to throw out troublemakers."
"That's what it says," Tiger Lily said.
"But… how? Why?"
"Bloody idleness!" Lavender said again. "All he sees us as is things to work, he don't want us having any pursuits of our own."
"It can't be right," Sango said again.
"How did this happen, then, Mr High-and-Mighty?" she said.
"I don't know! But— look, Lotho's family, if distantly, and— and maybe my father could talk some sense into him."
She laughed. "Like old Flourdumpling did? Well, just as long as the rich lads get it sorted. I'm sure Pimple'll be reasoned with, he's been so open to opposition so far."
"I don't think there's a need for name-calling."
"Everyone's calling him that. But you wouldn't know that, would you? Everything's just been getting worse and worse since he took Bag End and it's going to keep getting worse 'cus he don't care about nothing but coin."
"I don't think that's quite right."
"Everyone's hungry 'cus of him but if you don't think that's quite right, then I guess it must all be fine."
"That's not at all—"
"Can't you just listen to what I'm saying without trying to correct me?" Lavender shrieked. "I have made compromises for you, why can't you make them for me?"
The other Hobbits chattered around them as Sango and Lavender looked hard at each other. Tiger Lily found herself wishing she could be anywhere else right now. This was not going to be the evening any of them anticipated.
Widow Stabler's breaths were becoming ragged, but more jarring was the gentle clicking of Mrs Delver's knitting needles. It was like a hammer against Meg's skull.
"How can you be doing that now?" Meg said, more snappishly than she'd meant to.
"I have to be doing something," Mrs Delver murmured, not looking up. "You're the same."
Meg looked down at the darning in her lap. She'd started it knowing full well that Mrs Stabler would never wear that hat. She wasn't sure if she'd been doing it out of a hope that she might be wrong, or if she just needed something to do with her hands.
They watched the steady rising and falling of Mrs Stabler's chest, neither willing to break the awful silence but neither able to stand it. The relief was palpable when the knock arrived at the front door.
"I'll go and get it," Mrs Delver said, rising up.
The patter of feet as she went to answer the door. Meg could hear their voices, distorted by the distance and enclosed space. Meg jumped when the door creaked. There was no one there, but looking down she saw the cat winding his way around the door. He looked at Meg with the wide-eyed brazenness inherent to all cats and padded across the floor to the bed. He leapt up with ease and curled himself into a tight ball before closing his eyes, his stomach rising and falling in unison with his owner.
The arrival of Mrs Wormwood the pellar provided further distractions. She placed her hand on Mrs Stabler's brow and held her wrist, so certain of what she was doing, even in the circumstances. Meg watched as she ground a handful of herbs into a cup of warm water.
"What's that?" she said.
"Just something to relieve her pain. We're all entitled to a gentle death."
She brought the cup to Mrs Stabler's lips. The old matron sighed and fell back into a more peaceful slumber. Meg found herself staring at the wall, intently studying every crack and line in the bricks but always listening to the soft sound of Mrs Stabler's breathing. Eventually she realised that the sound had stopped, almost without her noticing. She looked around and found the pellar had drawn the cover over Mrs Stabler's face.
"Has she gone?" Meg said, despite knowing already. But she wasn't sure she'd believe it unless someone told her in words.
"Aye."
"Oh." Meg said, not sure what else to say. Confused and alone, like a rowboat on the Sundering Sea. "What do we do now?"
"We make the coffin and shroud for her. Will the other ladies on the row help?" the pellar said, addressing Mrs Delver.
"Aye. They will," she said softly.
"Good."
Mrs Delver gently pulled Meg up from her seat on the footstool. "Let's go home, lass."
Meg looked helplessly into her mother's face, desperate for her to say something, anything, that would make it better—or at least comprehensible. Death didn't make sense. How could someone who had been there moments before suddenly… not be?
Her mother must have been able to see this somehow, because she cupped Meg's face in her hands and smiled at her like she had done when she was a child.
"It's only death, lass. Comes to all of us."
The Hobbits had collected on a small strip of greenery that lay between the front of the inn and the road, stuck and untethered all at once. Tiger Lily, Lavender and Sango were sat in a small circle, at a loss for where else to go. If something as fundamental to village life as the inn could be whisked away by Lotho then what would come next?
Sango was sat back, staring up at the sky listlessly. "What do we do now?"
Someone must have brought a skin of their own, because there was a contingent of lads that were becoming increasingly loud and belligerent.
Tiger Lily found herself tensing without realising it. Looking at Lavender, Tiger Lily knew she felt the same. Sango seemed oblivious.
"I think I'll go over and talk to them," he said.
"Please don't," Lavender said.
"You can come if you like."
"No. Thank'ee."
He left, and soon his light voice could be heard alongside the others'. Lavender looked back at Tiger Lily with an expression that was tired, but not in the least surprised.
"Lads, eh?"
Even though she didn't have the words to explain why, Tiger Lily understood exactly what Lavender meant by this.
Her understanding increased as one of the louder groups, the one nearest her and Lavender, grew quiet. They were made up entirely of lads. Tiger Lily knew she and Lavender were being watched and did her best to look at them from the corner of her eye, so she could observe without them knowing she had noticed them.
One of the lads in the group lurched towards them while his friends made the noises of those trying not to laugh. He was obviously deep in his cups.
"Now what's two comely lasses doing alone in a place like this?" he said.
"We're here with my young lad," Lavender said.
Tiger Lily's heart was rattling against her collar bone as sweat rose up on her palms. She cast an aside glance at Sango but he was still laughing with a different group and had his back turned to them.
Please, please turn around.
"I'm sure he won't mind me keeping you company," the lad said, sitting himself beside them.
"You don't need to, he'll be back soon," Lavender said.
"You're very quiet," the lad said, turning to Tiger Lily. "You have your lad with you?"
She was still trying not to look at him, and the only answer she could give was a whimper.
The next thing, Tiger Lily was grabbed by the shoulder as the lad pushed his face too close to hers.
"Kiss for a hard worker?"
Tiger Lily shrieked through gritted teeth and tried to push his face away. The other lads were laughing somewhere away from her.
His face was jerked away from hers. Lavender was stood over them and had managed to pull the lad back. "Leave off, she don't want you."
He looked at Lavender curiously, as though not certain he'd heard what she'd said. Then he grinned and got to his feet, pushing himself towards her. "What about you, then? You'll go with anyone."
"Not with you," she scoffed.
"Leave her alone," Sango said suddenly reappearing and placing himself in between Lavender and the lad. He turned to her. "What's going on? Are you all right?"
Tiger Lily was paralysed. She could still feel the damp of his acidic breath on her neck.
"She's got you in her bed too, has she, young master?" the lad said.
Sango flushed bright red. "What did you say?"
"Been with half the lads in Bywater, this one. Did she not tell you? Ned Harlow, Nick Cotton, Guy Tunneller—"
"Stop this! Do you have no shame, slandering a young lady?"
"Sango—" Lavender said. She was notably unflustered by this assault on her reputation.
"Lady?" the lad laughed.
"And you wonder why no lass'll go with you," Lavender said coolly, taking Sango's arm. "Come on, lad."
"But he's questioning your honour!" he said shaking with indignation.
"I'm sure," she said. "Let's untie the ponies. We're leaving."
Tiger Lily followed the others to the stables, walking woodenly.
"Think you're too good for me?" the lad called after her. "The Chief'll set things right. We'll get what we're owed."
Tiger Lily didn't want to think about what this meant.
The walk back to Lavender's house was even tenser than the walk to The Green Dragon, and this time Tiger Lily didn't have the emotional capacity to try and fill the silence.
"How could you be so calm when he was spewing those lies about you?" Sango said eventually.
Lavender stopped and watched with a patient expression, waiting for the penny to drop. But it didn't. Sango was looking at her with the guileless expression of someone who is completely certain of themselves and the person they're with.
"Why do you think they're lies?" she said eventually.
He laughed uncertainly, as though the possibility of it being true was as absurd a notion as Lavender being from the moon. "Of course they're lies."
This was a conversation Tiger Lily very much didn't want to be a part of. She mumbled about her pony needing water and brought it to a stream that ran a little distance away from the path, and made a great show of stroking Posy's mane.
"The night we first kissed I asked more of you," Lavender said, not quite quietly enough to escape Tiger Lily's hearing. "Did you really think you were the only lad I'd ever asked that of?"
Sango had flushed again. His mouth opened impotently as he tried to work out the words he should use. "That doesn't make any sense."
"Why?"
Sango looked like someone had torn his book of poems in half. "I don't know."
"Just 'cus you don't want to make sport with me, that don't mean no one else ever did," she said. She sighed, folding her arms and tilting her head to one side, as though examining an interesting plant. "What exactly are you afraid of? Is it little'uns? 'Cus I've got this to be safe." She reached into her pocket and held out a leather sack on a length of string, identical to the one Rob had given Tiger Lily.
"For goodness sake, put that away," he hissed, looking around in a panic. Tiger Lily bent her head and pretended to be preoccupied with adjusting Posy's bridle.
"I just want to know why," Lavender said. "We're courting, we're meant to be able to talk about this sort of thing. Do you even like lasses that way? Lads? Anyone?"
"It's not proper. You know that."
"I don't know that, and I don't know why. Do you even know why?"
"Can we not have this conversation?"
Lavender sighed. "All right. You don't need to justify yourself. If you don't want to have sport that's your choice. But I need to be able to talk to you without coming up against a wall over and over again." She put her hands on his shoulders. "You've got some good bits, and I've given it a go, but I don't want to do this anymore."
"What are you doing?" he said, but the trembling in his voice showed that he already knew.
"Take care, lad."
"No. Please, Lavender," Sango said, clasping her hand.
"I've made my decision," she said. "Let me go now."
She came over to Tiger Lily, leaving Sango looking hollow, stood alone in the middle of the road. He seemed to still be trying to understand what had just happened.
"Are you really leaving him?" Tiger Lily said.
"It's about time."
"He loves you."
"I know he does, but I can't stay."
"You're good for him," Tiger Lily said pleadingly.
"Mayhap I am. But he's not good for me."
Lavender curled her finger around Tiger Lily's chin to tilt her head upwards. She smiled sadly at her. "You're a sweet lass. You remember that you can walk away if you need to. From anyone."
Tiger Lily gazed back at her. She realised that she liked Lavender best of all of Sango's sweethearts and was sad that she'd be going. "Why would I need to walk away?"
"Hopefully you won't. Look after yourself."
She left without glancing back at either Tiger Lily or Sango. Tiger Lily led her pony back onto the road. Sango hadn't moved and was staring blankly after Lavender. In the dim light Tiger Lily could see the moisture on his cheeks. She silently went to stand beside him, knowing that he would speak when he was ready to.
"Lavender's left me," he said.
Tiger Lily leaned her head against his shoulder. "I'm sorry."
He covered his face with a hand and said in a wobbly voice, "I don't know— I don't know what to do."
Unable to find an answer, Tiger Lily wrapped her arms around him. He turned his face into her shoulder and started to cry quietly. She'd always liked that about him; he didn't try to keep everything hidden away. Sango had never been shy about his grief whenever a courtship ended. Tiger Lily had comforted him through all of them, but this was the first time after she'd experienced a broken courtship herself. And it was a type of grief. It would be weeks or months until he could look forward to being in love again, his face cleaner for the tears shed. Though this time with him isolated in Overhill, Men roaming the Shire, and no guarantee they would have the same freedoms tomorrow that they had today… This one could hit him very hard indeed.
Hobbit funerals were generally short affairs followed by longer wakes. The latter was impossible at the moment, but Cover as still amongst the attendees of the former. Clover hadn't been especially attached to Widow Stabler, but her death had upset Meg and she wanted to make sure she was all right. Goodness knew Meg wouldn't look out for herself.
Meg didn't say much as the coffin was covered with dirt, bulbs sewn into the topsoil so that flowers would emerge there in the spring. While there wasn't a full wake, a few older Hobbits did arrange to have a quiet get-together at Mrs Budd's smial for tea.
Maizey didn't want to go, and because she didn't want to go neither did Rob, and because Rob didn't neither did Jack, and so the six eldest Delver siblings wandered into town together. They were quiet and sober, but in the comfortable way of a group of people who knew each other so well that they didn't need to bother with the usual social standards.
"D'you remember when Mrs Stabler used to take care of us, Maize?" Jonson said.
"Not sure. A little bit mayhap."
"It's been ages since we were all together," Jack said. "Where've you been, runt?" he said, nudging Clover with his shoulder.
"Working, what've you been doing?" she said, giving him a shove back. This was… nice. She didn't have to overthink everything she said and did because not every interaction was a means to an end. She could just be.
"I've been doing actual work, not making tea for toffs," Jack said.
"Clover works very hard," Meg said, linking arms with her. "What else have you been getting up to, then? Any gossip? Any lads?"
Clover hummed. When she told Dalgo she'd be attending a funeral that afternoon his eyes had widened like a child and he'd said, "Oh, I'm so sorry."
"I didn't know her well."
"It's always horrible when someone dies.
"Yes."
"You know you can come to me if you need to talk about anything."
"And you."
And that was that.
"No gossip," she said. "I'll let you know about the lad."
"When's the wedding?" Maizey said.
"Don't matter to you, 'cus you won't be invited," Clover said.
Nothing would come from whatever there was between her and Dalgo, but it was interesting regardless. Further observation was needed. She hadn't told her family about her reading lessons, or anything else that had been going between her and the Grubbs; it wasn't worth the fuss. They would know only when they needed to know.
Their group had reached the town now. They all gathered in the gap between the poulterer's and the haberdasher's to keep out of everyone's way.
"What about you?" Clover said, turning to Meg. "You been up to anything exciting?"
"No. I was looking after Mrs Stabler but now she's gone I don't know what to do with myself."
"I think we're all a bit at loose ends since the Dragon got closed," Jonson said.
This brought them into a different sort of silence, the prickly sort where everyone's wishing that whoever had just spoken hadn't.
"Strange, ain't it?" said Jack. "Can you imagine it happening this time last year? There'd be riots. Now it's just another thing."
"Last year feels… not real," said Maizey. "Like a dream or something."
"Did we really live like that?" Meg said. "No shortages. No Lotho. No big stupid blokes…"
"Apart from this one," said Clover, giving Rob a light nudge in the ribs.
He smiled and picked her up under the arms and placed her down again as far away from him as possible.
"I told you, you ain't allowed to do that no more," Clover said, hot-faced as Jonson wheezed.
Rob shrugged and leaned back against the wall, trying not to look pleased with himself.
"Oh dear, something's brewing," said Jack, straining to look at something happening on the main street.
The Delvers turned their attention to the market street, tentatively emerging from their bolthole.
There were two Shirriffs walking through the market, accompanied by one of the Big Folk. One of the Shirriffs had a board beneath his arm and both had frightened, uncomfortable faces. Something was about to happen.
One of the Shirriffs started to nail the board to the wall of the bakery while the other found a barrel to stand on. The Man stood a little distance behind them with broad arms crossed, like a parent overseeing that a child obeyed their orders. Once he was on his makeshift platform the Shirriff unfurled a roll of paper and cleared his throat, bringing the surrounding market into silence.
"By order of the Chief Shirriff, all Hobbits are to obey the following Rules for the benefit and order of all. Any who disobey the Rules will be taken to Michel Delving to be disciplined in such a way as befits the crime. Rule 1: No Hobbit is to be found out of doors after nine o'clock unless he is acting on the orders of the Chief Shirriff. Rule 2: No Hobbit may undermine, disobey or disrespect any person acting on the orders of the Chief Shirriff. Rule 3: To curb shortages, each Hobbit will only have his allotted ration of food each week. Rule 4: Each Hobbit will only have his allotted ration of fuel each week. Rule 5…"
The other Shirriff finished nailing the board up while his colleague read out the list. From this distance and in her current (slightly frantic) frame of mind, Clover could only decipher a few words, but that was enough to know this was just a written reproduction of the new Rules.
"Is this allowed?" Jack whispered.
"Apparently," Clover said. "The question is, who's there to stop him?"
"But I mean… Pimple can't just make up a load of new laws and say everyone has to follow them, can he?" Jonson said. "He's not the King."
"I suppose when you're as rich as he is, whether or not something's 'allowed' don't matter," Clover said, and pressed her lips together.
The Shirriff was in the middle of reading Rule 11.
"By the Holy Ones…" Jack said. "You think it's as bad as it can get but they always find a way to make it worse."
"It'll start getting better one day, though… won't it?" Rob said.
Clover felt a little sick. All the safety she'd felt from being with her siblings had gone. Any of them could be taken away at any moment for any reason, regardless of whether they understood it or not. And there wasn't anything they could do.
"I wouldn't bet on it, lad," she said.
A/N: Apologies for the lateness of this chapter. I had Covid lol.
Dear Guest Reviewer: You didn't ramble at all, your comments on the last chapter were fair. I suppose I put less emphasis on Tiger Lily's feelings regarding Rob specifically because their breakup had little to do with him personally and more to do with Tiger Lily's perceptions of Sango, propriety (especially as it pertains to marriage) and herself, so those were the things I focussed her having to reconcile with. My intention was to convey that when she broke up with him she was less frightened of the possibility of Rob wanting to be intimate with her (prior to Sango's warning there was a scene in which she was considering taking this step herself) and was more frightened of the possibility that he would abandon her afterwards, as she felt she wasn't worth enough for anyone to desire her sincerely. As you said, none of this is particularly fair on Rob. I should have portrayed this better and delved more into her feelings on Rob specifically, and I'm sorry I didn't.