-Chapter 247-
Six Blasters for a Hedgehog
Tranquil Gulch
Being from the desert, the citizens of Tranquil Gulch were no strangers to sudden, often wild changes in the weather; dust devils, heatwaves, and even the occasional earthquake. But today, the Gulchers found themselves caught up in something different: a lightning storm. Bolts of blue and yellow zapped and crackled about the streets. Thunderous booms resounded as two supersonic forces of nature duked it out for the fate of their home.
"Getting tired yet, hedgehog?!" Thunderbolt taunted.
"You kidding?!" Sonic shot back. "I'm just getting warmed up!"
Sonic made to swing at Thunderbolt, only for the chinchilla to sidestep out the way.
"You're open!"
Thunderbolt charged forward, curling into a ball and spinning rapidly, right into Sonic's gut.
"Stealing my moves, eh? Plagiarizing rat!"
"Stealing? Ha! Hardly!" Thunderbolt pointed to Sonic's torso. Confused, he looked down and noticed a patch of electricity gathered where she had struck him.
"What the…?!"
"Static Burst!" Thunderbolt snapped her fingers, causing the electricity to flash and spasm erratically. Sonic barely had time to scream before it exploded in a burst of lightning, launching him through the window of an abandoned saddlemaker's shop.
"Okay…" he let out before getting up. "Now I'm mad."
"You ready to give up yet?!" Thunderbolt taunted.
Sonic stood, cracking his neck. "I'm just getting started."
Sonic took a breath and charged at Thunderbolt again with renewed gusto.
-X-
Meanwhile…
In another part of town, Sally ran through the streets, Nicole's terminal in hand.
"Sally, I'm picking up a signal from one of the Magnet Towers!" Nicole reported. "One of the Desperadoes is nearby!"
"On it!" Sally hurried in the direction Nicole indicated, leading them to the tower where Wired Earp was just prying himself loose. The robo-wrangler grit his iron teeth as he pushed and struggled with all his might. Finally, with a crackle of electricity and a metallic screech, he pulled himself free.
"Whew!" he sighed. "Damn… that was one helluva pull."
Suddenly, Earp rolled off to the side, just in time to dodge an attack from Sally's Ring Blades.
"Damn!" she cursed.
"Whoa nelly!" Earp adjusted his hat. "Well now, Princess Sally. Dint expect to be goin' up against you."
"Wired Earp," Sally greeted.
"Have to say, those are some intriguing weapons you have there. Hard-light construction generators?"
"Actually, yes. I'm honestly surprised you're familiar with them."
Earp rolled his optics. "Come now, my dear. I know I'm of a rustic make, but I'm still an Eggperial Commander. Technology is our bread and butter."
"Yeah, that's a good point. Well made," Sally blinked. "Wait… Eggperial?"
"My attempt at humor. How'd I do?"
"...Not bad. I've certainly heard worse."
"You're too kind."
"Well now, for one of Eggman's robots, he's quite the gentleman," Nicole mused.
"A-thank you. However, I'm afraid the time for pleasantries has, unfortunately, expired," Earp drew his pistols. "Draw!"
Earp fired at Sally, who blocked the shots with her Ring-Blades. Once she got close, she attempted several thrusts and swipes at Earp, only for him to dodge each of them.
"Very good, Princess!" Earp raised his pistols, which began glowing. "But not good enough!"
Sally's eyes widened.
"Backdrafter!" Earp pulled the triggers on both his pistols simultaneously, releasing a powerful, close-range burst attack. The blast launched Sally forward and himself backward, putting a sizable gap between the two. As Sally flew through the air, Nicole materialized by her side and caught her, allowing her to land safely.
"Thanks, Nicole."
"Don't mention it." A bang resounded, followed by the thunk of metal on wood. "Watch out!"
Nicole manifested a digital force-shield in front of her, just in time to block a bullet that would've hit Sally square in the head.
"Never bring a blade to a gunfight, Princess!" Earp declared. "That was your mistake here!"
Earp fired off several more shots, all of which ricocheted off the various buildings, fences, and other structures, and all towards Sally and Nicole.
"...This is bad," Sally said as she slashed at the projectiles, "I hate to admit it, but Thunderbolt knew what she was doing when she built this guy."
Sally swatted away several bullets, only for one to graze her cheek.
"Sally, we need to get in close!" Nicole exclaimed. "As long as he's away from us, he has the advantage."
"I know, Nicole!" Sally barely avoided a bullet in the head. "Any chance you can use one of your battle programs?"
"Let me see." Nicole focused, attempting to execute one of her battle programs. But as the energy pixels gathered in her hands, they started to fizzle out. "No! The electrical interference from yesterday! It's back!"
"Well, that's just great."
"Come out, come out wherever you are, ladies!" Earp called. "I promise to make this as painless as I can!"
Sally grimaced, then scratched her chin in thought. "I might have an idea. Nicole, open up Battle Program #7984."
"What? Sally, I already told you, I can't..."
"Just do it. Trust me on this."
"...Alright." Nicole focused. "Initiating Battle Program 7984."
"Good," Sally ran out at Earp.
"Sally!" Nicole objected.
"Just keep at it, Nicole!"
Earp looks on in stunned surprise. "Well now… I certainly wasn't expecting this."
He began firing at Sally again. As he did, Sally slashed away and side-stepped his shots. A few grazed her, but she managed to get close to the Despicable Desperado.
"Is she crazy?" Earp pondered. "She's left herself wide open. Ain't no way she can dodge or block me now." He shrugged. "Welp, her funeral."
He took aim and prepared to fire off another Backdrafter. "Well Princess, I tried to warn you, but it looks you–"
Suddenly, Sally vanished in a flash of magenta pixels, Nicole reappearing in her place. "What the-?!"
"Surprise!" Nicole declared.
"No, wait!" Earp shouted, but it was too late, Earp's guns fired his charged attack, However, all the attack did was phase right through Nicole's holographic body. "The hell?!"
" !" Before Earp could react, Nicole summoned her spear and plunged it through his chest. "Sally, he's open!"
Nicole vanished again, causing Sally to reappear. Before he could react, the squirrel princess plunged her Ring-Blades into his chest in the same place Nicole had.
"You got me…" Earp managed. "Well played, Princess."
The light in Earp's eyes faded as he shut down, then fell over backwards. Nicole let out a sigh of relief. Sally pulled out her terminal to check up on the holo-lynx.
"I think I'm going to have to sit the rest of this battle out," she said. "Activating took more out of me than I thought."
"Take five, Nicole. You earned it."
Nicole bowed before fizzling out. Sally sighed.
"Actually… I'm feeling pretty spent myself." She winced, clutching her arm. "I hope the others are having better luck."
-X-
Just Outside of the Town…
"We are having horrible luck today!" Sam exclaimed.
And why was he having such horrible luck? Because at this very moment, Sam was out in the open prairies outside the town, riding atop Cosmo in her Mover Mode, as a very fast and very angry Batch Cassidy attempted to fry them with electricity.
"Get your punky-black-rockstar butt back here, boy!" Batch roared. "I ain't done tryin' to tan it!"
Batch fired a stream of electricity from his electrode hands, which Sam barely managed to duck under.
"Any bright ideas?" Cosmo asked, her voice somewhat distorted by her transformation.
"I'm working on it!" Sam replied. "Right now, I'm too busy wondering how the hell we got into this mess!"
Flashback
A few minutes ago, Sam and Cosmo were making their way through town, trying to find one of the Desperadoes.
"It's quiet," Sam mused. "Too quiet."
"Sam, you've said that three times already," Cosmo deadpanned. "I believe we've established that it's quiet."
"Yeah, and that's the problem. According to Rotor, the Magnet Towers should've worn off by now. Meaning we should be having at least one killer Skippy-Toe Lou animatronic coming after us. So, where are they?"
"I don't know. Maybe they're having enough issues at hand to deal with us."
"Hand?!"
The two jumped, turning to see a sparking Batch Cassidy emerge from the alley. Batch stomped forward, glaring at the two Freedom Fighters viciously.
"Crap, he found us," Sam let out.
Batch fumed for a moment before taking a deep breath. "Alright, cool yer circuits Batch… Cool yer circuits." After composing himself, Batch grinned. "Well now, top of the mornin' boy and girl! Batch Cassidy's the name, zappin' folks my game! I take it you two are gonna be my dance partners for this lil' soiree?"
"I...believe so?" Cosmo asked.
"Wonderful!" the cow-bot did a little twirl, "So, how do you kids wanna do this? Ten paces and draw? Hexas Hold'em? Ruskian Roulette? Maybe drink oil til there's only one standin'?" He paused. "Naw, too Billy."
"Wait, what are you talking about?" Sam questioned.
"I'm talkin' bout how we gonna do this? Just cuz we gotta kill each other don't mean we can't have us-selves a lil' fun."
"That's...awfully sporting of you," Cosmo mused.
"Um… well…" Sam scratched his head. "If I had to choose, I'd say no weapons. Just mano a mano. Hand-to-hand."
Batch twitched. "What was that?"
"Uh... hand to hand combat. Good old fisticuffs."
Batch scowled, optic twitching. "I...I see...you sure you don' wanna play a couple...rounds of cards? It'd be fun. I'll even shuffle!"
"But Mr. Cassidy, how would you do that?" Cosmo asked. "You don't have any hands."
Batch finally exploded. "And just what's that supposed to mean!? So what if I wasn't built with no hands!? You think you're better than me or something? You think you're better than me!?"
"We never said that, sir!" Cosmo objected.
"I'll teach you to act like you're better than me!" Batch screamed as his body pulsed with electricity.
"Cosmo?" Sam began calmly.
"Yes, Sam?"
"Now would be a good time to RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!"
He took off running, barely making it two steps before Cosmo, in Mover Mode, scooped him up with her neck from behind. He slid down her back, holding on as she took off at full speed.
"Are you alright?"
"Yeah, I'm good," Sam paused. "Hold on, since when could you talk in Mover Mode?"
"Well…" Before Cosmo could explain, a bolt of lightning zipped past them. "What the-?!"
Cosmo and Sam looked over their shoulders to see Batch chasing after them on foot, his body practically shining with electricity and his electrodes aimed right at them.
"Y'know what, you can tell me later. If we survive."
Flashback Over
A few seconds passed before Sam perked.
"Wait... Cosmo, evasive action! I've got an idea!" Sam looked over his shoulder at Batch. "Gotta say Batch, you really got us on our toes here!"
"Course I do! I was built to take down your boy Sonic! I can finish you two off, easy!"
"Really? Cuz it looks to me like you could use some back-up. Maybe have Earp or Billy lend you a hand!"
"THAT'S IT!" Batch launched a lightning bolt, Cosmo hopping to the left to avoid it.
"Sam!" Cosmo cried. "What are you-?!"
"Just focus on running and not getting fried! I know what I'm doing!" Sam turned back to Batch. "S'matter cowboy, can't hand-le a little joke? Here, maybe me giving you a big hand will help!" He clapped sarcastically for emphasis.
"Don't screw with me!" Batch fired off a few bolts.
"Y'know, I get the feeling you're upset about something, but I can't put my finger on it." Sam ducked a lightning bolt. "At least I know not to play rock-paper-scissors with you. It's hardly fair when all you can do is rock!"
"You're really starting to piss me off, boy!" Batch roared.
"Bad mood? Here's a kicker! What did the finger say to the thumb? I'm in glove with you!"
"That's it!" Batch began gathering all his electricity into one attack. "I'm gonna zap you so much! Your ashes will be ashes!"
"Sam..." Cosmo managed.
Sam patted her back. "Just hang in there, Cosmo."
"You think yer so great wit' yer phalanges and your carpal-tunnels and your cutey-cles! Well, let's see how well yer precious hands save you from-" Suddenly, Batch's lightning began to flicker and die down.
"What the...? My...My power!" Suddenly, Batch's electrodes exploded into shards of glass as two gunshots rang out. "My electrodes!"
"Oops."
Batch looked up to see Sam sitting stop Cosmo, a smoking gun in his hand.
"Looks like you've been...disarmed." Sam hopped off Cosmo, gesturing to Batch, "All yours, milady."
Cosmo turned to Batch, snarling at him. The bot gulped nervously.
"Uhhhh...sure ya don't wanna play Hexas Hold'em?"
Cosmo let out a saurian roar as she lunged at Batch.
"Oh God, no!"
"Keep at it Cosmo, keep at it." As the flororaptor mauled Batch, Sam took a moment to pull out his joke book and turned to a memo page. "Let's see, which one should I add? 'In glove with you' or 'Disarmed'? Hmmm… Tough call."
A few moments later, Cosmo returned holding Batch's Magnet Core in her mouth. The core was sporting a prominent crack.
"All finished!" she declared, her speech slightly muffled by the metal orb.
"Cool!" Sam put away his jokebook. "Well, I'd say we did pretty good."
Cosmo nodded, happy that she was finally able to contribute to the battle.
"In fact, I think we really nailed it." Cosmo winced a little in response. "Too soon?"
At that, a final volt of electricity leapt from Batch's core and zapped Sam, causing him to spasm for a few seconds. When he stopped, the young, would-be GUN cadet stood there, slouched over and slightly singed.
"Everyone's a critic," he grumbled.
-X-
Elsewhere…
Rotor and Hope were making their way through town, looking around for the enemy.
"Hmmm...no sign of any of the Desperadoes here," Rotor said as he examined his Omnitool.
"Only means they're hiding," Hope mused. "Or they're so low tech that they don't register."
"Likely the latter." Suddenly, the tool beeped. "Hm? The Omnitool's picking up something!"
"Where?"
Rotor held up the Omnitool, moving it around. "No...No..." Suddenly, the device began beeping furiously. Rotor turned to see where it was coming from and his expression turned flat.
"Of course..." he groused.
"What's wrong?" Hope turned to where the walrus was looking: the saloon.
"Why am I not surprised…" She sighed and pulled out her firearm. "Come on."
The duo headed for the doors. As they drew closer, they could hear a voice singing.
"Cramptown ladies sing this song/ Doo daaaaa~/ Doo daaaa~/ Doo daaaa~/ FIVE MILES LONG!"
Quite poorly, in fact.
"Oh jeez…" Hope cringed. "This is awful… he sounds like Danny during karaoke night."
"He sounds like my dad after Happy Hour," Rotor added.
Hope perked. "Your dad was an alcoholic?"
"Hope, focus."
"Right."
Rotor held up three fingers and started counting down. 3...2...1… "Go!"
Hope and Rotor burst into the saloon, pistol drawn and fists ready to break some faceplate.
"Freeze! G.U.N.!"
"Hands where we can see them, and don't…!"
The two Freedom Fighters paused, taking in the sight before them: Billy the Kit sitting at one of the tables, which was covered in a mountain of empty liquor bottles...his latest he was currently pouring down his throat, with loud gulping. He was about halfway through the bottle when he saw them standing in the doorway.
:"Oh! It's the...the Feedom Frighters!" the Despicable Desperado declared as he threw the bottle over his shoulder. The sound of glass shattering echoed as a cat yowled loudly in pain.
"Welp, party's o'er," he said as he slowly got up from his chair "Time to..." Only to step on a bottle that had rolled off the table, causing him to slip and fall flat on his back with a loud thud. "Ow… I hurt mah ayuss."
Rotor and Hope just looked on, wondering what the heck they were looking at.
"Is…Is he drunk?" Rotor asked incredulously, "Like actually drunk? Can robots get actually drunk!?"
"I have no idea," Hope said.
Billy slowly got up, rubbing his skidplate.
"Eeeeeegh...Y'all made a biiiiiig merstake a-comin' in here!" he slurred. "Cuz now, ol' Billy's gonna...he's gonna..." Billy paused.
"Surrender?" Hope offered.
"Yes!" Billy blinked. "No wait, that ain't right."
"Pass out?" Rotor suggested.
Billy shook his head. "Nope, that's later. What was it?"
As the Badnik thought, he pulled out a flask of whiskey and started drinking.
"Okay, morbidly curious, but does that even do anything for you?" Rotor asked.
"Yeah, I mean… you're not organic," Hope remarked. "It took an EMP pulse to make Shard drunk."
"Oh, I'm a whole new line o' experi...expired...exposit..."
"Experimental…" Hope supplied.
"Brand new kind of Badnik that runs on somethin' other than that there oil an' gem thingies."
"Wait, you're a booze-powered Badnik?" Rotor realized.
"Yep!" Billy belched. "I needs plenty o' sweet, nutritious alcohol ta power mah fuel cells. I mean, fuel mah power cells! I mean...I needs it to run right."
"...How did Eggman approve that?" Hope questioned.
"How'd Hamegg prove what?" Billy hiccupped.
Rotor and Hope just looked at Billy for a moment, wondering just what their lives had become.
"Let's just get this over with," Rotor decided.
"Agreed." Hope shot the bottle in the bot's hand, leaving him holding a jagged neck.
"Huh?" Billy looked into the bottle. "Where'd the whiskey go?" Billy threw it away, prompting a pig to squeal. "Oh well, better git another."
He headed over to the bar.
"Hey! Get back here!" Rotor ran over, getting the Desperado in a full nelson. "Gotcha!"
Rotor's victory was short-lived when Billy's head turned 180 degrees to face him. He belched loudly, unleashing a cloud of alcohol fumes in the walrus' face.
"Agh!" Rotor covered his mouth in disgust, allowing Billy to escape and draw his pistol.
"That wudn't very nice!" He prepared to shoot.
"Rotor!" Hope cried.
Billy pulled the trigger...only to miss Rotor completely, the bullet instead hitting a clock on the wall.
"Huh?" Rotor blinked as Billy stumbled around.
"Had enough?" Billy shot again, this time hitting a picture frame, knocking it onto the floor.
"What the heck?!" A bullet whizzed past Rotor, getting a yelp out of the walrus as he kept randomly shooting.
"Ah'm gonna git you, you fat, purple beaver...thing!"
"Beaver!?" Rotor let out, offended, as he dodged another bullet.
"And I thought Sonic was a lousy shot," Hope deadpanned.
"So that's how you wanna play?" Billy smiled wickedly as he reached behind him. "Well alrighty… let's play!"
Billy pulled out a new weapon that had the Freedom Fighters' jaws dropping.
"What the...!?" Hope exclaimed.
"Is that a crank-operated rotary gun!?" Rotor shouted.
"HEDLEY LAMAAAAAAAR!" Billy shouted as he began rapidly turning the crank, shooting up everything in sight
"MOVE!" Hope shrieked as she and Rotor made a break for the nearest cover, an overturned entire time, Billy just kept on shooting randomly, laughing like he'd just won a blue ribbon at the county fair.
"Yer ass is ass an' ah'm the grass-man, maaaaan!" he screamed before belching loudly.
"Okay, we gotta take this guy out, now!" Hope shouted, "Before he brings the whole place down on us!"
"Hmmm..." Rotor noticed a partly full whiskey bottle. "Hello." He grabbed it, tearing a strip out of his shirt sleeve. "Just stuff this here..." He stuffed the fabric into the bottle. "Hope, gimme a light."
Hope pulled out her lighter, igniting the cloth.
"Perfect." Rotor grinned before reeling back and throwing the Molotov cocktail. "Fire in the hole!"
"Wha?" The bottle landed right in Billy's open-top head, causing him to stop his rampage, "What jus' happened?" He sniffed the air. "Who's cookin' biscuits? Wait...that ain't biscuits. That's..."
Suddenly, Billy burst into flames. The result was instantaneous: Billy started running around the saloon, screaming and flailing his arms about. "Heeeeelp! I'm burnin'! Im burrrrrnin'!"
Eventually, he ran straight for Hope and Rotor, who leapt out of the way as he ran out the door. The two looked out the door to see him still running around.
"Fire! Fire! FIRE!"
After about a minute of running, Billy tripped over and landed into a horse's water trough, putting him out. He sighed in relief as he steamed as he raised his head out, smiling in dopey happiness.
"Whew! That was a close one! Fer a moment ah thought I was a-" Before Billy could finish his thought, he spasmed. "Oh wait, I ain't waterproof. Well, sh-"
At that, Billy's head exploded and his body collapsed. Rotor and Hope walked over to take a moment to contemplate their opponent.
"Well now, that...happened," Rotor said.
"Yeah..." Hope agreed.
"Seriously, who builds an alcohol-powered robot? I don't know whether Thunderbolt's crazy talented or just crazy."
"Says the walrus who made six super-electromagnets out of some dime store refrigerator magnets."
"Well, you got me there." Rotor shook his head, "Anyway, we'd better get going."
"Yeah..." Hope nodded. "Hope the others are doing alright."
-X-
Meanwhile...
Antoine and Bunnie had found themselves in a rather peculiar predicament. After searching the town, they'd managed to discover one of the Despicable Desperadoes - DOS Holliday - keeping watch over one of the buildings. The Badnik hadn't noticed them, so they attempted to sneak around and get the drop on him; only to find that he wasn't keeping watch at all. He was just standing there, doing absolutely nothing.
"Well, this is quite the conundrum, non?" Antoine mused.
"What conundrum?" Bunnie asked, "He's just standin' there. Starin' off into space wit' those big ol' robot eyes." She winced. "Honestly, it's kinda creepy."
Antoine took a moment to wave his hand in front of DOS' eyes, then tap his forehead. "Helloooooo! Monsieur Badnik?" he called as he knocked on the egg-shaped robot's head, "Est-ce qu'il y a quelqu'un à la maison? (1)"
No reaction.
"It would appear that no one is home."
"I coulda told you that, hun."
Antoine hummed in sadness, shaking his head. "It would seem that this one is a dud."
"Looks like." Bunnie activated her arm's laser cannon. "Let's put it outta its misery."
As the bionic belle prepared to fire, a sound caught Antoine's sensitive coyote hearing; the click of a gun.
"Bunnie, get down!"
Antoine tackled Bunnie to the ground, just in time for a laser to whiz right through where Bunnie's head was.
"What in tarnation!?"
An ominous chuckle reached their ears. The two turned to see Chassis James walking over to them, blaster in one hand and a whip in the other. "Well lookee here… I was wonderin' where you'd wandered off, DOS. Looks like I got here just in time too."
"Seems we've been made, cher," Antoine mused.
"So it would seem."
Antoine and Bunnie got up, Antoine drawing his sword and Bunnie readying her blaster.
"Awwww, the lil' fleshies got their own lil' weapons. Ain't that just precious?" James let his whip unwind. "Lemme show y'all mine!"
James swung his whip, which Antoine caught with his sword.
"I'm not impressed," Antoine deadpanned.
James grinned beneath his neckerchief. Bunnie looked down at James' hand and saw him flick a switch on the handle of his whip.
"Antoine!"
Suddenly, an electric current travels through the whip, zapping the swordsman, who screamed and spasmed in pain.
"Impressed now, meatsack!?" James taunted.
The electrocution stopped, leaving Antoine singed. He coughed up a puff of smoke.
"Cheap... shot…" he wheezed before falling over.
"Antoine!" Bunnie shrieked as James cackled evilly. "You... you no-good, two-bit toaster!
"Awwww, did I break yer boytoy, runny-babbit? Here!" James prepared another whip attack,
"I'll break you too!"
James swung his whip at Bunnie, who deftly dodged, firing on him… only for the shots to bounce off of him.
"The hell!?"
"This big bod ain't jus' fer show, girlie!" James boasted as he aimed his blaster, "It's also indestructible!"
James' pistol charged up, a ball of light forming at the end of the barrel.
"Eat this!" James fired a massive laser at the rabbit.
"Aww hell..." Bunnie barely managed to avoid the laser, part of it nicking her cybernetic arm. Bunnie cried out, clutching her arm, the exposed circuitry sparking.
"That all you got?" James scoffed. "Pathetic. Seriously, how in blazes has Dr. Robotnik had so much trouble killin' you flesh-things?"
"We're tougher than we look," Bunnie shot back.
"Can't be that tough. I just took the both of you down in one shot! Least you lasted a lil' longer thanks to them robo-limbs of yers. Probably woulda done somethin' if the rest of ya matched."
Bunnie's eye twitched. "What did you say?"
"I said, ya probably woulda been able to do somethin' ta me if the rest of that squishy sausage bag of yers were robot too. What, are ya weak and stupid, meatbag?"
Bunnie snarled, straightening up.
"Aww, I strike a nerve?" James prepared another whip attack, "Lemme fix that fer...!"
Bunnie caught the whip in her fist.
"What the...!?"
Furious, Bunnie ripped the whip from his hand, adjusting it in her grip.
"Let me show you what a meatbag can do, junkman."
James aims his gun at Bunnie. "Y-You bitch...!"
Bunnie swung the whip, grabbing James' wrist. With a mighty tug, she ripped his arm off, gun and all. James let out a pained scream.
"Awww, did I break yer hand, Mr. Robot?" Bunnie sneered in playful malice, "Here..." She cracked the whip again, slashing his chestplate, "Lemme break the rest of you too!"
Bunnie slashes James again, this time severing his other arm.
"Why you-" James managed before Bunnie began swinging the whip rapidly, James shouting in pain with each strike. When she finished, James stood there for a moment, after which his body fell apart into pieces.
"How's that for a meat bag?" Bunnie taunted as James' severed head rolled over to her feet.
"H...How?" uttered James' severed head incredulously, "That blast shoulda wrecked yer arm up..."
"It wasn't the arm. It was me."
"Y...Y...You..." James managed before his head split in half, shutting him down for good.
"Phew…" Bunnie sagged in relief. "Damn, this must be how Kat feels all the time. No wonder she's so angry."
A groan reached her ears. Bunnie turned to see Antoine struggling to get up.
"Antoine!" She ran over to him, gently helping him up. "Honey, are you alright?"
"Oui...just a little...crispy." Antoine winced. "Honestly, my pride hurts more than my body. I can't believe I fell for such a simple attack. Madame Lulumae would never let me hear the end of it." He smiled. "At least she would've been proud to see how well you fought. I know I am."
Bunnie smiled, only to wince in pain as she clutched her damaged arm.
"Damn!" she winced. "Guess that tin-can got me more than I thought he did."
"Looks like." Antoine sheathed his sword, using it as a makeshift cane. "Come, let's get you to Rotor so he can patch you up."
"Right."
As the couple made their way down the street, life slowly returned to DOS' eyes…
-X-
In the Thick of it…
Lily peered around a building, Ichiro in her hands.
"Hmmm… nothin' here." She dashed around the corner and dashed down the alley, keeping her eyes and ears peeled for any of the Desperadoes. "Eggman, you and yer metal bastards took everything from me. Well you ain't takin' anythin' else!"
She perked as she heard a metallic footstep around the corner. Immediately, she readied her gun, pressing against the wall. After a mental count to three, she immediately raised Ichiro and jumped out from the corner, preparing to fire... only to find herself in a Mexican standoff with Shard, who had similarly prepared his arm cannon. A dead silence followed as the two recognized the other.
"Oh, you've gotta be kidding me," they let out in unison.
"The hell are you doin' here, Robo-Hog?" Lily demanded.
"I was looking for the Desperadoes and thought you were one of them," Shard replied. "Lily, do you have any idea how close you were to getting blasted? If I hadn't seen it was you…"
Lily scoffed. "Like you'da been able to outshoot me. Sonic may have the fastest feet in Northamer, but I got the fastest hands." She twirled her gun in her fingers. "An' don't you forget it."
"Right… okay then," Shard deadpanned. "Let's just focus on finding the Six, shall we?"
"Gladly," Lily walked past Shard, who followed after her. She grimaced. "Hey, do you mind? I'm bot-hunting."
"What do you think I'm doing? Planting a spice garden?"
"Well, go do it somewhere else or something!" Lily snapped. "I can't concentrate with you stalkin' behind me!"
She peeked around a corner. "All clear."
As she kept going, she scowled, still hearing Shard behind her. She spun around to face him.
"Didn't I tell you to beat it? You're bugging me!"
Shard scowled. "Are you always this nasty to people who try to help you?"
"I don't recall askin' you fer yer help, ya metal menace!" Lily looked through the window. "No one in there either."
Shard was looking around himself, scanning. "I'm getting nothing on radar."
Lily gritted her teeth. "Dagnabbit, ya gussied up scraps of tin, get outta yer hidey-holes and face me already!"
"Lily!" Shard snapped.
"What?!" Lily hissed. "What do you want from me?!"
"For you to keep your voice down! Do you want to get jumped!?"
Lily scoffed. "That's my problem, not yours."
"What…" Shard shook his head. "You realize these guys are Horde Commanders, right? That means they're strong, fast, and likely made of Megatal! You go in half-cocked, you'll be dead before you can even breathe!"
"I can handle myself, Robo-Hog. You just worry 'bout you and yers."
As she walked off, Shard lunged forward.
"Hold it!" He grabbed her hand, stopping her.
"What the-?!" Lily spun around, scowling. "Let go of me!"
"These are Super Badniks. I'm not letting you go out there alone."
Lily struggled. "I said let go!"
Shard refused to release her, and after a minute, Lily grabbed her gun. "I'm not playing. Take your stinking paws off me, you damn dirty Badnik, or I swear to Aurora I'm gonna-"
Shard's eyes flared red as his temper ignited. Lily gasped, her anger replaced with shock. "I am not a Badnik. I am a GUN agent. A Freedom Fighter," he intoned coldly, "I've tried to be nice and patient with you. I've tried to be reasonable and understand what you're going through. I am sorry about Jesse, but I didn't roboticize him, and I'm sick and tired of you taking your Eggman hate out on me!"
Lily stared back at Shard. Looking into his furious glowing eyes, his mouth curled into a scowl. She was terrified. Not because she was staring down an angry robot with a blaster for an arm, but for a brief moment, in her mind's eye, that robot's black and yellow paint job flashed blue.
Lily could only look on in terror. "No...Please..."
Seeing her condition, Shard took a deep breath, releasing her and composing himself. "You wanna be enemies, Lily? Try me. But save it for after we save the town. There are bigger things at stake than a stupid little vendetta."
"Yeah, like me!"
Shard and Lily turned around to see several lasers heading right for them. They barely managed to get out of the way in time.
"Don't go killin' each other!" Six Gun Pete boasted. "That's my job!"
"Pete!" Lily yelled. "Dammit, he snuck up on us!" She glared at Shard. "If you had just buzzed off and done your own thing…"
"Well, if you had just listened to reason and kept your voice down instead of picking fights with me-" Shard shook his head to clear it. "What the hell are we doing?!"
They dodged some more laser blasts.
"I believe that'd be turnin' into the World's Whiniest Smiss Cheese Wheels!" Pete fired off several more lasers, this time having them bounce off the buildings. "Dance, cowpokes!"
The lasers came right at the pair, forcing Shard to throw up his White Shield.
"Well, Dr. Bennet's new update seems to be working! So that's good!"
"Y'know, I'm surprised ta see you pallin' 'round wit' the Robo-Hog of all people, Lily!" Pete taunted. "Him bein' a Metal Sonic knockoff and all!"
"Not my choice, ya rusty dung-beetle!"
"Still pretty darn funny considerin' what the real one did to yer boyfriend!"
Lily's eyes went wide. Even Shard paused.
"So that's what's going on…" He realized. "Metal Sonic… He…"
"Yep! Scooped the lil' four-eyed shit-flicker an' threw him the mecha-machine himself! I even got a video! Wanna see?!"
Pete's eyes glowed, causing him to project a holographic video. The video showed the HUD of a Buzzbomber, displaying Robotnik commanding his troops as he invaded Tranquil Gulch.
"Swatbot Division A! A group of townsfolk are attempting to escape northward! Regroup with Division B and intercept them! Division C...!"
A bullet hit the Egg Mobile. He turned to see Lily aiming her pistol at him. "What the-?!"
"It's over, Eggman! Git outta our town, or I'll blow your ugly whiskers off!"
"Ugly!?" Robotnik demanded, offended. "I'll have you know I spend thirty minutes a day grooming my mustache! Fifty strokes! Each side!"
Lily fired at Robotnik again. "Whoop-de-freakin'-do! Time for a shave!"
A bullet whizzed past his head, taking small hairs from his mustache as it did. "Next one goes through your face!"
"Ah-ah-ah!" Robotnik snapped his fingers. "Little girls like you shouldn't be playing with dangerous toys like that..." Robotnik pointed down, revealing a Swatbot holding a little girl with black hair and a green and white dress. "You could hurt someone."
Lily looked in horror. "Jamie!"
"Lily...help!" Jamie pleaded.
Lily glared at Robotnik. "If you lay one finger on her-!"
"You'll do what?" Robotnik questioned.
The Swat aimed its weapon at Jamie's head, much to Lily's horror. Jamie teared up, sobbing quietly as Robotnik chortled evilly. Suddenly, a pile of cow dung hit the doctor right in the side of his head. He let out a yelp, prompting the Swatbot to turn to its master to see if he was alright; an opportunity Lily used to put a bullet through its optics, causing it to release Jamie, who promptly ran over to her.
"Jamie!"
"Lily!"
As Lily grabbed Jamie, Robotnik spat, rubbing the manure off his face.
"Oh Aurora!" he exclaimed. "Some of it got in my mouth!"
He was promptly hit with another wad of manure. As he wiped it off, he seethed with rage.
"Alright, who did that!?"
"Lily! Jamie!"
All eyes turned to see a boy who Shard recognized as Jesse MacNeil.
"Jesse!"
"Big bro!" Jamie cried.
"Hurry!" he shouted. "Get outta here! Run!"
"But what about–!?"
"I'll catch up!" Jesse shouted, motioning for them to run. "Just go!"
Lily watched as Jesse threw another cowpie at Eggman, biting her lower lip. Finally, she grabbed Jamie and ran.
"Come on, Jamie!"
"No! Jesse!"
"Hang on, let's fast-forward a bit." Pete tapped the side of his head, causing the video to skip ahead. The view shifted to a different HUD, this one looking more sleek and refined. Shard could only gape in shock, for it was almost identical to his own.
"Any sign of him yet, Metal?" Eggman asked.
"Not yet, Doctor," the Robo-Hog replied.
"Well, keep searching! I want that little bastard groveling at my feet!"
"Sir, it's just a cowpie, we have–"
"Quiet!" the doctor shushed. Metal obeyed and was greeted by the sound footsteps and harried breathing. He quietly floated over to find Jesse hiding behind a stack of boxes.
"Whew! Finally, I lost them…" Jesse whispered, not realizing he had been found, "Now I just need to get to sneak out, head north, and regroup with everyone at…"
"Jesse MacNeil." Jesse stiffened as Metal suddenly launched forward and tackled him to the ground. Jesse yelped in pain as Metal pinned him to the ground. "For the crimes of rebellion, assault, and resisting arrest, you are under arrest and will be tried as an adult by the Robotnik Empire."
"Ooh! Lil' bit more," Pete said as he fast-forwarded again. When it resumed, the video showed Metal dragging Jesse by his arms in front of a crowd of townsfolk.
"Let me go!" Jesse cried out as he struggled to get free, "You won't get away with this! You hear me!? You–"
Metal struck Jesse on the head, eliciting a pained yelp from the boy.
"Quiet, brat!" he barked.
"Good work, Metal Sonic," Dr. Robotnik praised, "Now, put him in the Roboticizer."
Everyone, both in and out of the video, watched in horror as Metal dragged Jesse over to a metal pad with a glass tube rising from it; one that everyone had become synonymous with "fate worse than death".
"No! Not that, anything but that!" Jesse cried out, but his pleas were ignored as Metal threw him inside.
"Citizens of Tranquil Gulch!" Robotnik declared as he pressed several buttons on the Egg Mobile's dashboard, "Let this boy's fate serve as an example and a reminder of what happens to those who dare to defy me!"
"Help! Get me out of here! Get me out of here!" Jesse called out as he banged on the glass of the tube.
"Be they man or Mobian, rich or poor, old or young." The doctor twirled his finger as he motioned it towards a big, red button.
"Somebody! Anybody! Do something!"
"All living things shall kneel before their master, and that master…"
"Sheriff Scott! Mr. Hino! Lily! Mom! MOMMY!"
"Is ME!" he slammed his fist on the button, causing the Roboticizer to come to life. Pete grinned ecstatically. Shard looked on in horror. And Lily…horror didn't even come close to describing how she felt. Ever since that day, her dreams had been stuck on permanent repeat. The same awful scene playing over and over again every time she closed her eyes. The flashing lights. The terrified faces of the townsfolk. Jesse's mother and father's looks of terror and Jamie's crying face as their son and brother was stolen from them. Changed into something no longer human. No longer alive. If they said anything or cursed the doctor, she couldn't remember. All she could remember was Jesse's tortured screaming. Screaming that lasted for thirty, tortuous seconds.
Then, silence. Ten seconds of pure silence as the machine died down. No evil laughter. No horrified screams. No wails of despair.
"All hail Dr. Robotnik."
Until the thing that was once Jesse MacNeil said those words. Four words that broke the silence and unleashed all the sounds and emotions it had been holding back. Four words that would go on to haunt her dreams for the next year and a half. Four words that had destroyed her world.
"Yep!" Pete said as he shut down the video, "Real shame Sonic and his buddies had to go and wreck everythin' with that there De-Roboticizin' machine. That boy was one of our best workers!" He shook his head in mock pity, "If he hadn't, you probably coulda seen him again. Ya woulda made a cute robo-couple."
Lily's eyes widened as she looked up at Pete, the Badnik's mouth curling into a cruel, crooked smile.
"Bastard…" Shard spat.
Suddenly, Lily let out an ear-piercing scream and aimed her pistol at the White Shield before unloading it.
"Lily!? What are you–!?"
Lily said nothing, she just kept screaming as he shot at the barrier until it started to crack.
"Lily, stop! You're gonna–!"
But it was too late, the barrier shattered like glass, allowing Lily to jump out and charge at Pete.
"I'll kill you!" she shouted as she reloaded her gun, "Do you hear me!? I'll kill you!"
Lily began shooting at Pete, who barely had time to react as the raging demon he'd provoked dashed forward, firing away at him. The shots didn't hurt, but they managed to stagger him enough to keep him from counterattacking, and let Lily close the gap. As soon as she was close enough, she drew her sword and swung, slicing off all six of Pete's arms in the time it took to blink. But, rather than scream in terror or cry out in pain, the Badnik was smiling.
"Gotcha!" he shouted, as four new arms emerged from their sockets and grabbed Lily. Two of them wrapped around her waist, and two around her shoulders.
"Lily!" Shard cried as he raised his blaster arm.
"Don't move, Not-Metal!" Pete shouted, stopping the Needlemouse in his tracks as he sprouted his last pair of arms, both armed with blasters and aimed at Lily's temples, "You do that, I'll paint the walls wit' her brains!"
Shard grimaced. Despite the way she'd treated him, he wasn't about to let Lily die, so he lowered his blaster.
"That's more like it," Pete said, "Now…" The Badnik was suddenly cut off by a kick to the head from a black, metal foot, knocking it off his shoulders and forcing him to drop Lily. The Badnik screamed as his head hit a wall and landed in a garbage can, leaving his headless body standing there and Lily looking on in shock.
"Gotcha!" Shard said as he pumped his fist, hovering just above Lily.
"What the…!?" the cowgirl cried out, "How in blazes did you–!?"
"I was built by GUN using Metal Sonic's schematics, and he was built to match Sonic in every way," Shard explained, "I may not be as fast as him, but I can fake–"
The sound of a laser blast echoed through the alley, followed by the stench of melted metal. Shard looked down to see a gaping, red-hot hole in his chest, a smoking blaster pointing right at it. A smoking blaster that was still being held in Pete's hand.
"Wh-What…?" Pete's spare arms suddenly grabbed Shard before spinning around and throwing him into a nearby wall.
"Robo-Hog!" Lily cried out. Before she could go check on him, the sound of laughter echoed from Pete's body. She looked up and gaped in shock as a new head emerged from his neck stump.
"I got him!" the six-armed bug-bot cheered, "I took down the faker-bot! Big Boss Metal's gonna be thrilled!"
"You…" Lily gaped, "How are you…?"
"Spare body parts, Missy," Pete said as he loudly patted his torso, "I'm sure yer new buddies went pokin' 'round in my ol' body and saw all that crud lyin' there."
"B-But why didn't you…?"
"Do that yesterday?" Pete scoffed, "And ruin the surprise? Psssh! Just how steeeewpid do you think I am?"
As Pete chortled to himself, Lily turned to where Shard had landed. The Robo-Hog laid there, completely motionless. His eyes flickered on and off as his parts sparked and beeped. He was completely still. He didn't even twitch. Why would he? He was a robot. An object. A machine.
A machine that looked exactly like the monster that took her best friend away from her. A machine that everyone loved and cared about like they would any other person. A machine she'd badmouthed, shunned, and called a monster every chance she got since she saw him. A machine that had just saved her life despite all that. And now, that machine was lying there…dead. Dead because of the real metal monster standing before her.
Lily reached for her pistol, only for Pete to shoot it out of her hand.
"Don't even try it, girlie."
"You…You killed him," she snarled, earning a confused look from Pete.
"Who? The faker-bot?" he asked, "I thought you hated him?"
"I-I..." Lily stammered, uncertain.
"He's a robot. We're a dime a dozen. We're tools, not people. Well 'cept fer me, o' course..." Pete drew his guns. "I'm a weapon."
Lily gritted her teeth, trying to seem defiant; though even she could tell she was failing. Pete prepared to fire.
"Say g'night, ya...!" Suddenly, Pete's arms fell out of their sockets once more. "What the!?"
"Hey Petey Pie..."
Pete slowly turned around to see Shard standing, his arm blaster aimed at him, while he clutched the hole in his chest with his free hand. "You missed."
"What?! How are you still...!?" Before he could finish, one of his legs fell off. "Ah! What the...!?"
"Buddy, that's the least of your worries right now."
"You lousy, no good..." As Pete ranted, Lily looked at where Pete's leg had been cut. The slice was clean and smooth.
"What in the world...?" Lily turned to the side and saw a small, circular, serrated blade sticking out of the ground. "A saw blade."
"That does it..." Lily turned in time to see Pete regrow his limbs and pull out some new guns, "You think you can outgun Six Gun Pete!?"
"I'm game if you are," Shard shot back.
"Hmph! Fine by me."
Shard pressed a few buttons on a panel in his blaster before taking aim. "You like my cybernetic Shredder Blades, asshole? Well, try some more on for size!"
He fired several more saw blades, each one tearing through Pete's body like it was wet tissue paper.
"Dirty fraggin', nibber-flaggin'..." Pete ranted. "STOP SHOOTIN' THOSE!"
Shard's response was to fire one at his head.
"That does it…" Pete charged up his guns. "I'm done playin' games! Six Guns Showdown!"
Lily ducked as Pete began spinning his guns and firing randomly, sending lasers everywhere.)
"Crap, this move again!" Shard narrowed his eyes. "Unfortunately for you...I know how to counter it."
Shard aimed his blaster and began firing off randomly.
"What the…" Lily managed. "Are you even tryin' to hit him!?"
"No!"
"The hell do you mean 'no', you...!?"
Lily looked up and saw one of Shard's blades intercept a laser that was heading right at her. The laser reflected off the blade and right into Pete.
"Agh!" Pete grunted.
"Oh yeah, I forgot to mention! My blades have molecule level sharp edges, are made of Megatal-steel alloy, and..." Shard grinned, "are highly reflective. But that's not all this little Needlemouse has up his sleeve!"
He spun around with a flourish, revealing what appeared to be a sledgehammer now sprouting from the muzzle of his blaster. It launched out on a hydraulic jack, slamming full force into Pete's face and knocking him on his skid plate with a grunt. Shard ran over, grabbing one of his discarded Shredder Blades. He then pinned Pete to the ground and sliced him down the middle.
"No… way…" Pete wheezed before his body split in half, spilling out a random assortment of junk, including but not limited to an electric egg beater, a hair dryer, and an old 32x game console add-on.
"Wherever robots like us wind up, I hope you got friends on the other side, Pete…" Shard caught the Magnet Core, crushing it to powder in his fist. "'Cause no one's gonna miss you here."
He released the powder into the wind before turning back to Lily, who just stared at him. "You...You..."
"Are still alive? Yeah, I know." Shard tapped his chest plate. "Got an auto-repair system built into my power core. Can fix any damage I take as long as it remains intact and the Power Gem running it has juice. Speaking of which…"
He pressed the gem in his abdomen. Immediately, several wires sprouted out of the hole Pete had blown in him, filling it in before his armor plating covered it; in minutes, it was as if he had never been injured (2). Lily cringed in a mix of disgust and fear.
"Uuuugh!" she let out. "That's so gross..."
"Yeah, I know. Remind me to talk to Hope about making it less... visceral."
"R-Right..." Lily looked at Shard. "Why?"
"Because I don't want to gross people out every time I-"
"Not that, you idjit! Why did you save me? After everything I said, how I've treated you…"
"Part and parcel of the Freedom Fighter job. You don't pick and choose who you save. It doesn't matter who they are, what they are, what they look like, where they came from, or what they've done. We took on this mission to save everyone from people like Eggman and Thunderbolt. Because everyone's lives and freedoms are precious. Whether they're innocent people like Jesse…" Shard glared daggers at Lily, "...or jerks like you."
Lily winced.
"Now then," Shard pressed on, "Pete is down. Here's hoping the others aren't having too many issues."
As they headed back into town, Lily's mind drifted back to Hope's earlier words: "They may be made of metal, but they have feelings and can think and make their own choices. Which means they have souls. Souls of silicon, maybe, but souls nonetheless."
"Silicon souls…" Lily stopped to think. Suddenly, a thunderous boom echoed through the town. "What the?!"
"What in the world was that?" Shard demanded.
"It came from the town square!" Lily realized.
"Shit…" Shard cursed. "Sonic's fighting Thunderbolt there!"
The two raced off.
-X-
Town Square
Sonic and Thunderbolt stared each other down. Both were breathing heavily and are covered in cuts, bruises, and singe marks.
"You ready… to call it?" Sonic panted.
"In your… in your dreams, hedgehog!" Thunderbolt shot back. "This battle isn't over...until I bring what's left of your carcass back to Master Robotnik in a matchbox!"
"Now who's dreaming?" Sonic raised an eyebrow. "Seriously, why the hell would you ever want to serve a guy like that?"
"Why?!" Thunderbolt hissed, sparking slightly. "I'll tell you why! People have looked down on me and scorned me for years! Nobody thought I would ever amount to anything, or even took me seriously, all because I was small, fat, and 'adorable'! Even my own parents didn't support my dreams! 'Big people do big things, little people do little things', they said." Thunderbolt's hands trembled in rage, before she calmed down a bit. She almost looked…sad, "Julian Kintobor was the only one who ever supported me; who ever believed in me. And when he turned, he reached out to me at the lowest point of my life, and gave me a purpose." She clenched her fists. "All my life, the world has tormented me, rejected me, stepped on me. Well, guess what? Now it's my turn. I will tear down the shitty society that hurt me... and replace it with the one Master Robotnik desires!"
"Even if he stands against everything Julian stood for and believed in?"
"Master Robotnik is everything Julian Kintobor believed in!"
At that, Thunderbolt charged at Sonic, and their clash resumed once more.
"There's bad people everywhere, Thunderbolt!" Sonic said as they fought, "I'm sorry for what happened to you, but it doesn't give you an excuse to hurt people and ruin innocent lives!"
"NOBODY'S innocent, Sonic! They just haven't had a chance to make fun of me yet! Now, quit flapping your gums and die already!"
Thunderbolt performed another electrically charged Spin Dash attack, forcing Sonic to catch her. He attempted to hold her back, but the speed of her revolutions and the lightning made it increasingly difficult. He began sweating from the effort.
"Damn...you're like that bunny from the battery commercials," the hedgehog snarked, "You just keep on going and going and going!"
He managed to kick Thunderbolt back. She breathed heavily, angry, bitter tears in her eyes as she was surrounded by an electrical aura.
"You like cracking jokes, Sonic?" she let out, her tone altering wildly between animalistic anger and tearful breaking. "How about this one? What do you get when you cross a lonely Mobian chinchilla with a society that abandons her, and TREATS HER LIKE TRASH?!"
"An angry emo freak?" Sonic asked, trying to cover his visible nervousness.
"I'll tell you what you get! YOU GET WHAT YOU FUGGING DESERVE!"
Thunderbolt sparked heavily before vanishing.
"What the...where'd she go!?"
"Volt…"
Sonic perked, his spines tingling. "Uh-oh…"
"BREAKERRR!"
Suddenly, large, yellow lightning bolts crash into Sonic, Culminating in Thunderbolt appearing high in the sky above him.
"Say hi to your spiky, blue ancestors in hell, pincushion!"
The lightning crashes down on Sonic, seemingly vaporizing him. Thunderbolt grinned widely before cackling like a loon.
"I did it! It's all over!" She cheered, still hovering in the air. "Sonic the Hedgehog is dead, by my hands! The world is ours! Long live the Robotnik Empire!"
"Guess again, Sparky!"
"Eh?!" Thunderbolt looked down to see Sonic Spin Dashing in place, the air around him rippling and distorting.
"What the...!? That's...That's impossible! I fried you with enough amps to power Casinopolis!"
"Guess you're not as bright as you thought!" He shot out towards her.
"No!" Thunderbolt launched another lightning attack as Sonic spun even faster.
"Like your new move, Blunderbolt! Here's a little something I've been working on!"
Sonic spun even faster, causing the air around him to become more turbulent.
"You…" Thunderbolt launched more electricity, but it didn't do anything. "I beat you once, I can do it again! I am Thunderbolt the Chinchilla! Egg Boss of the Soumercan Egg Army! Supreme Commander of Shock Troop! Master Robotnik's Strongest, Smartest, and Most Loyal Follower!"
"Well, I'm Sonic the Hedgehog! Founder of the Knothole Freedom Fighters! Hero of Mobius! And it's time to take the wind out of your sails, Rikachu!"
With a yell, he came out of the spin and kicked his leg out with all his might, unleashing a thin blue wave of compressed air at Thunderbolt. The wave sliced through Thunderbolt's electricity with ease.
"What!?" Thunderbolt shrieked. "No! No no no! Nononononononononononono! Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuug!"
The wave hit Thunderbolt head on, knocking her out the air and sending her plummeting to the ground. A loud crash resounded through the desert, kicking up a cloud of sand and dust.
"Yes!" Sonic cheered. "Finally got the Air Cutter down!"
As he landed, the dust cleared to reveal Thunderbolt's lower half sticking out of the sand. She kicked and screamed, trying to get out as Sonic chuckled.
"I could just leave her there," he pondered before shaking his head. "No… No."
He walked over, pulling her out like a turnip. She panted, taking in her surroundings.
"Deja vu, am I right?"
And just like last time, Thunderbolt zapped herself out of Sonic's hand. "Don't touch me!"
Sonic let out a yelp, shaking out his hand before glaring down at her. "It's over, Thunderbolt. I win this round."
"Ha! As if!" Thunderbolt scoffed. "I still have plenty of power left to destroy you!" She began sparking with electricity. "And when I do, I'll...!"
She stopped, hearing a gun click.
"You'll what?"
Thunderbolt looked over her shoulder to see Willie pointing a shotgun at her.
"Willie?!" Sonic exclaimed.
"Oh, this should be good," Thunderbolt muttered.
"Listen up, 'Sheriff'!" Willie declared. "You got 'til the count o' ten fer you and the rest of yer tin-men to git out of our town and stay out!"
"Or what? You'll shoot me?" Thunderbolt laughed. "My Electro-Accelerator lets me match Sonic's speed! I can run over and disassemble that little boomstick AND slice your tail off in the time it takes you to blink! And there's nothing you can do about it!"
"Maybe not her," Dennis walked out, holding a gun of his own. "But I can."
"And me!" Another townsperson came out.
"And me!" And another.
"And me!" And another. More and more people kept coming out, each armed with some kind of gun. Pistols, shotguns, rifles. There was even a guy twirling an old-fashioned sling climbing out one of the windows.
Thunderbolt scowled. "You…I am an Egg Boss! I will not be bullied by a bunch of hicks! Do you hear me?! I'll fry you like your nasty chicken and serve you with mac and cheese!"
"So why don't ya?" Willie asked, getting a pause. "We're actively resistin' the Robotnik Empire. Ain't ya gonna do yer job and put us down?"
Thunderbolt narrowed her eyes.
"Maybe you wanna throw us into yer fancy Robotizin' machine or somethin'?"
"The Roboticizer is obsolete! We...!"
"Rika," Sonic cut in, getting a gasp. "Do yourself a favor and just get outta here before you make like Team Bullet and blast off."
Thunderbolt stiffened, then slowly turned to Sonic; her eyes wide with shock.
"Wh-where did you hear that name?" she demanded.
"I got to know my enemy," Sonic replied with a shrug.
"That's…That's not my name… Rika Chinchilla is dead! I am Thunderbolt! You hear me!? Thunderbolt! And I will destroy all of you!" She raised her hand. "Badniks, attack!"
Nothing happened. "Badniks?" Thunderbolt looked around. "Earp? Batch? Billy? DOS!? Where the hell are you guys!?"
"Lookin' fer somethin'?" came Lily's voice.
Sonic and TB turn to see the others heading for the square, each of them holding a trophy from one of the Despicable Six.
"That… that's impossible!" Thunderbolt exclaimed. "You... you destroyed my Despicable Desperadoes?! "
"Guess it's back to the drawing board for you, Thunderbolt," Sam smirked. "Maybe you'll have better luck with your best pots and pans next time."
Thunderbolt's eye twitched. "You...wretched..."
"But hey, don't let that stop you," Sonic quipped. "After all, you beat us all by yourself last time. You can do it again, easy. You got plenty of juice left, right?"
Thunderbolt looked around. She was completely surrounded, completely outnumbered, and from the sparking of her aura, completely outmatched.
"Well, Rika?" Sonic asked. "What's it gonna be?"
Thunderbolt looked around, sweating bullets before swallowing. She grimaced. "I dislike you immensely."
"Feeling's mutual," Sonic shot back.
"Fine! You win this time, hedgehog. But mark my words...it will be your last."
With that, Thunderbolt zapped away, running as fast as she could.
"Holy crap…" Rotor perked. "Sonic, you did it! You beat Thunderbolt! You beat an Egg Boss!"
"Yeah…" Sonic managed a smile. "I did, didn't I?"
Several people in the crowd began applauding, which soon broke into cheers. Sonic pinched himself.
"I did it…" He muttered to himself. "I actually did it… I won! I-!"
He was cut off when Sally ran over, hugging him. They share an embrace before Sally pulled away, smiling at him.
"I knew you could do it."
"Thanks for believing I could, Sal."
The two stared at each other for a moment before slowly leaning in.
"Sheriff Thunderbolt!"
Suddenly, everyone turned to see DOS running in.
"I heard yer signal and I'm here to help! Where are those doggone...!?" DOS looked around at all the Freedom Fighters and townsfolk. "What the...? Where'd everybody go? Is the battle already over? Did we win?"
"No." Rally suddenly bashed DOS on the head with a metal rod, caving in his headplate. "Not even close."
Great Desert
Thunderbolt walked through the desert, clutching her wounded shoulder.
"Miserable, disgusting, worthless hedgehog... How dare he humiliate me like this!? ME! I'll show him. I'll be back. I'll come back even stronger than ever! With more power! And an army of Badniks! And when I do, I'll watch in delight as he grovels and begs for mercy that will never come!"
She laughed, only to get hit with a blast of energy and bounce a few feet away. She got up, spitting out some sand. "Who dares attack the mighty Thunderbolt!? I'll-!"
"You'll what?"
Thunderbolt looked to see Kid staring her down.
"Y-You!" she exclaimed. "W-what are you doing here?!"
"I believe I should be asking you that, Thunderbolt. Aren't you supposed to be in Soumerca?"
"I go wherever Master Robotnik needs me!" She angrily pointed at Kid. "And that's Boss Thunderbolt to you, cabron!"
Kid just stomped on her. "Watch what you say, gorda (3). There are children present."
Kid pointed to his Cruiser, where Cream was playing with Matti and the others. They were all oblivious to what's going on.
"Wait a min- That's Cream the Rabbit! She's a Freedom Fighter!"
Kid just stomped on her again. "It's not polite to interrupt." He picked her up by the tail. "Now talk. What's going on here?"
Thunderbolt gritted her teeth. "First Sonic ruins my plan to acquire Tranquil Gulch for the master, now this. I've hit rock bottom.
"Yeah, sounds about right." Kid reached into his pocket and pulled out a rectangular device with a button on it. He pressed it, causing a portal to open. "Why don't you go sleep it off at the Citadel?"
Thunderbolt looked at Kid, horrified. "You wouldn't dare!"
Kid moved his scarf. "Would I?"
TB gaped in horror as she got a look at Kid's mouth. "¡Diosa mía!"
Kid just punched her. "Shut up! Never speak about HER in front of me! EVER! Do you understand?!"
"I-I…"
"Do you understand?! Yes or no?!"
"¡Sí! ¡Sí! ¡Entiendo, entiendo! (4)"
Kid calmed down at that. "Excellente." He covered his face. "Now then, get your fat, furry rear back to your boss, and tell him this." He leaned in close. "The Wyldwest is my turf."
At that, Kid threw Thunderbolt through the portal, which closed behind her.
"Chupaheuvos (5)..." he spat in disdain before heading back to the Belial, where the others were playing Loteria.
"Okay, next is El Mundo!" Jose declared.
Cream put a bean on a piece of paper that looks like a bingo card with different pictures. "Loteria!"
"Aww dangit!" Bill said.
"We lost," Matti remarked.
"This is really fun," Cream collected her winnings. "It's like Bingo, but with pictures."
"You like it?" Jose asked. "It's a favorite game from my home country. I used to play it with my friends all the time before–"
"Ahem!" Everyone turned to see Kid approach.
"Ah! Jefe!" Jose declared.
"Hello, Kid!" Cream greeted. "Jose and the others were showing me how to play Loteria."
"Sounds like you had fun." Kid noticed Cream's pot. "And you cleaned out."
Cream beamed happily.
"So, what's the word, Kid?" Bill asked.
"We're almost to Tranquil Gulch. We should be there by nightfall. Also, it appears that Sonic is there."
That got everyone's attention.
"El erizo? Azul Rápido!?" Jose demanded.
"Si, Jose."
"Oh thank goodness!" Cream exclaimed. "I can't wait to see him again."
"You know Sonic the Hedgehog?" Matti asked.
"Yeah. He rescued my village and parents a while back. He's a really good friend. We're Freedom Fighters together." Jose promptly flipped out. Bill and Matti looked at her in shock. Kid just stood there. Cream looked at them all, then blushed. "Oh right, I guess I forgot to mention that. Sorry."
"Nah, it's alright," Kid assured.
The group turned to Kid.
"Jefe?" Jose asked in concern.
"C'mon, we need to get going," Kid insisted. "We're burning daylight."
"Right, let's mosey," Bill agreed.
The group headed back to the Belial. Matti watched as Kid helped Cream in.
"Upsy-daisy!"
"Thank you, Kid," Cream smiled.
Kid nodded, preparing to go inside.
"She's not her," Kid froze, turning to Matti. "Don't think I haven't noticed your little attitude adjustment. You're like a completely different person when you're around her."
Kid glowered at her. "And if I am?"
"You can't keep this up forever," the armadillo said as she walked over, her voice and expression as flat as ever, "She's going to find out eventually. What you are. What you're really like."
Kid looked down at his hands, then at the guns in his belt.
"You can pretend all you want, but it's not going to change anything," Matti said, "She's gone."
Kid lowered his head sadly. "I know."
"Kid! Matti!" Kid snapped out of his stupor to see Cream and Cheese waving for them. "C'mon! It's time to go!"
"Coming!" Kid climbed in. "Matti, c'mon. We gotta go."
Matti sighed. "Yeah, sure."
As Matti climbed in, Bill started the engine. "Alright! Next stop, Tranquil Gulch!"
Bill hit the gas, and the cruiser roared to life. As they drove, Kid took a moment to look at Cream, watching the rabbit and her Chao stare at the landscape outside.
"Aurora…" he thought. "If you can hear me and you have any sliver of that limitless compassion everyone says you have… Stop time… Just stop time and let this ride last forever…"
Author's Note:
(1): Is there anyone at home?
(2): Think like Meta-Cooler's regeneration in Dragon Ball Z.
(3): Fat woman.
(4): Yes! Yes! I understand! I understand!
(5): Egg sucker.
So, Sonic beat Thunderbolt in the rematch. Things are looking up!
Next up, we cut back to Lulumae's place to see how the others are coming along.
Voice cast for this chapter:
* Jamie - Karen Strassman (Nanako Dojima from Persona 4, Sawako Yamanaka from K-On!, Kallen Kozuki from Code Geass, Rider from Fate/stay night, Mayu Miyuki from Ai Yori Aoshi, Rosa Farrell in Final Fantasy IV)
Please R&R. Until next time!