Chapter 7: The Explanation

Renji felt relief wash over him as he left the senkaimon and stepped into the living world. He turned and flash stepped toward Kisuke's shop, wondering if the former taichou would be able to help them. He hoped, briefly, that being in his body, Kuchiki Taichou hadn't encountered any of Jinta's unpleasantness. He had already been annoyed before and didn't need anything to make the situation worse. Of course, he knew it would get immediately worse upon demanding and hearing Renji's account of the tachou's meeting. But, then, if they were in front of others and still being in Byakuya's body, he was likely to avoid any real unpleasantness. Still, he tried to think of the best way to explain as he reached the shop and stepped inside, ignoring Jinta's open-mouthed gaze as he passed. He rather liked the effect Taichou had on the brat…

Kisuke and Yoruichi's amused expressions, along with Byakuya's frown told him that Byakuya had been successful in explaining what had happened. And he didn't see any big guys with needles, so he had to figure that Kisuke had chosen to believe what he'd been told.

"Ah, you're here!" Kisuke said, trying to suppress a smile, "So tell me, how did the taichou's meeting go?"

Thanks a lot, Kisuke! Do you want him to kill me?

"Oh, uh, that! It was fine," he said, trying to look like he wasn't scared to death.

He was thankful that Kuchiki Taichou's face, not accustomed to showing fear, simply yielded a frown.

"Fine, huh," Kisuke said, stepping closer and studying him carefully.

Renji was deeply aware of Yoruichi using her hand to hide the smile she couldn't quite contain. Byakuya stood near her, his reiatsu flaring hotly.

"So," said Kisuke, taking a quick sample of his reiatsu, "what did you taichou's talk about? As I recall, those meetings could be a bit tedious at times. It must have been hard to stand still for so long."

"Oh, it wasn't so long. Soutaichou actually excused me early."

Shit!

Byakuya was staring, as if such a thing had never happened before. Kisuke and Yoruichi were staring at each other and holding back their laughter as Byakuya stepped closer, eyeing him suspiciously.

"I'm sure I've never heard of such a thing," Byakuya said in a low, 'just this side of threatening' voice.

Granted, Renji didn't find it nearly as threatening coming from his own body, especially not while he was wielding Byakuya's, but just the same…they were, most likely going to switch back at some point and…

"Abarai," Byakuya said, his voice going frighteningly calm.

Renji had never considered himself to be all that intimidating, but with Byakuya making the most of the narrowing of his eyes, the position of his body and the leaking of hot, red reiatsu, he felt himself take a step back. He heard muffled snickering that rose into a chorus of laughter as the reiatsu around Byakuya flared and Renji stepped back further, swallowing hard.

"Hell, I don't know what's funnier," Kisuke howled, "Byakuya in that body or Renji's body making Byakuya's body shake in its shoes!"

"Ah…Taichou," said Renji tentatively, "maybe we should take this somewhere, uh, more private."

"Right here is fine," Byakuya said in an icy tone, "Now, why don't you tell me what inspired Soutaichou, who just sent two barely recovered officers on a mission to Hueco Mundo on their first day back at work, to excuse you…or rather, me from an important taichou's meeting."

He was almost nose-to-nose with Renji now and Renji could see the pent up fury seething in his dangerously glinting brown eyes.

"It's not the kind of thing he would do," Byakuya explained, his voice deceptively calm, "There would have to be a compelling reason for him to do so. Why don't you tell me what that reason was?"

Renji held his eyes for a moment longer, then his shoulders sagged and he figured that he might just as well get it over with.

"I…I don't think I fidgeted or got too distracted, well, except by Soutaichou's wrinkles…and the hell butterfly, but…"

Byakuya flinched, distracting him.

"But they didn't seem to notice so much until I described the creature that attacked us."

Byakuya's eyes closed.

"Dare I ask," he said, his voice trembling under the force of controlling his fury, "exactly how you described it…Renji?"

"Hair blacker than mine…"

"Yes…"

"Bigger than Shiba Ganju…"

Byakuya reached up to rub his eyes.

"Not exactly how I would have phrased it, but let's just go on…"

"Ah…faster than a tornado, claws like knives and…"

Renji swallowed.

"And?" Byakuya prompted him.

"Uh…uh…breath was bad…"

"Bad?"

"Yeah, bad breath…"

"That isn't all…is it?"

He held the angry eyes for a moment longer, then his shoulders sagged even more and he closed his eyes and forced it out.

"…breath…worse than Ikkaku's after a bender…"

Everything was silent…too silent. Renji opened an eye and got a very rare glimpse of Byakuya made speechless. Kisuke and Yoruichi stared, red faced and only holding back so as not to miss Byakuya's meltdown.

But for the longest time, he just stared into Renji's eyes, open-mouthed and silent. Finally, he closed his mouth, straightened and took a step back.

"You know, Renji," he said quietly, "I am surprised…that they allowed you to leave the room and didn't sedate you and have you removed for observation and psychological analysis."

"I left before they could catch me," Renji said, managing an apologetic smile.

Byakuya nodded solemnly.

"Renji?"

"Hai, Taichou?"

"The next time there is a taichou's meeting…you are to call in sick. And for the remainder of the time you inhabit my body, you do not leave my sight. Do you understand?"

"Hai, Taichou."

He turned to Kisuke, who cleared his throat and swallowed hard.

"If you have no further questions, we are returning to the Seireitei. Let us know when you have some information for us."

Kisuke smirked.

"I'll do that. You two take it easy…and stay out of trouble…if you can."

He and Yoruichi waited until they were just out of hearing range to loose their long-concealed howls of laughter.

"So…ah…Taichou, what do we do now?" Renji asked.

"Stop calling me that," Byakuya said, frowning, "We are returning to Kuchiki Manor and secluding ourselves. I can't afford to have everyone thinking I've lost my mind."

Renji's face fell.

"Look…I'm sorry. I didn't mean to disappoint you, to embarrass you. I really didn't."

Byakuya sighed.

"It isn't your fault," he said quietly, "I shouldn't have made you go to that meeting. You weren't comfortable with the idea and I pushed you into it anyway. It's my own fault."

"But you told me what to do, Taichou. I was just stupid and clumsy. I tried. I really did, but…"

Byakuya stopped and placed a hand on Renji's arm to stop him. He looked down into the gray eyes and found Renji's spirit looking back at him with regret.

"Renji, all that happened was that I asked you to do something that you are not accustomed to doing. You do not lack intelligence and you were not being clumsy. You were just…yourself. You can't help being yourself."

His fingers found several black hairs that had escaped the kenseiken and he brushed them away from Renji's face.

"And despite what happened, I'm not disappointed in you. As a matter of fact, Renji, I find your honesty…the way you show yourself fearlessly to the people around you…to be…pleasing."

Renji stared at him, mystified.

"You…do?"

Byakuya nodded. He looked around to make sure that they were alone in the park they had entered and moved closer to Renji, placing a hand gently on his forearm.

"If you consider my upbringing," he said, the words triggering Byakuya's memories and making them flow into Renji's stunned mind, "and I think you can see it now, then you will know that as a member of a noble family…I am not in the habit of allowing things to escape my control. That makes the thought of living a more free spirited life very enticing. The one thing I enjoy about inhabiting your body is that I am not expected to be in full control. I am allowed that honesty, that sharing of self. You are the more unfortunate, I think, because you are forced to place yourself under controls you are not used to. But you shouldn't take it as a lack of intelligence or ability that causes you to slip up. It took years of…of…conditioning, training and focus for me to learn to contain my impulses. It wasn't fair of me to ask that of you. So, I will avoid doing so as much as possible for the duration of this…experience."

He turned away and started walking again, with Renji following, silent and still inundated with the visions of what Byakuya had endured as a child to learn such discipline. He didn't feel as bad about what had happened at the meeting, but the feeling had been replaced with a sadder one. He felt bad for Byakuya.

The heart that beat beneath that slender white breast was every bit as passionate as his. It had been difficult for him to shut everything away beneath those tight controls, to distance himself from others, to assume such responsibilities as he carried.

It was very different than the life Renji knew.

No one had ever really told him what to do. In Inuzuri, he had just done what was necessary to survive. It had taught him to be strong and fearless, but also to be protective. It had taught him to fight when he needed to, but to enjoy the calm of peaceful times…and to reach out to others, to strive with them for mutual happiness and contentment, even when such things were hard to find. Even once he became a member of the military and had given up some freedom, the trade off had been a more full life and an escape from the constant struggle and hopelessness of a life in Inuzuri.

What Byakuya did, he did to honor his family…out of a sense of duty. And although he had power and status, Renji sensed the restlessness beneath everything, the barely contained desire to be seen as he was and loved for it. The difficulty, of course, was that because of who he was, getting inside, seeing him, knowing him, was something that was not easy to do. But Renji realized suddenly, that he was in the position to make that happen. He was inside Byakuya's body, in touch with his elusive Taichou's memories and emotions. He had a once in a lifetime opportunity and, he decided, he was going to make it count. As he and Byakuya stepped into the entry to Kuchiki Manor, he promised himself that he wasn't going to miss the chance that had been laid at his feet.

"Where are we going?" he asked, then wanted to kick himself.

Byakuya was heading somewhere and trying to lead the way while making it look as though he was leading. They entered a room and Byakuya closed the door behind them. They were, Renji realized suddenly, in Byakuya's bedroom. He met his taichou's eyes questioningly.

"We have been injured and are recuperating. There is an attendant's recess in the corner of the room where I will sleep and you will sleep in my bed."

"But…"

"It is necessary to keep up appearances. It would hardly be acceptable for my body to occupy the attendant's recess in my own room. I assure you, I will be more comfortable there than…"

He stopped himself, realizing what he had been about to say. He saw that despite stopping, the blow had landed. There was hurt in the gray eyes that looked back at him.

"Yeah, I guess being in my apartment was kind of a shock after being so used to this," Renji said in a soft voice.

"That isn't what I meant, Renji," Byakuya said quickly.

"Hey, it's fine. Why would someone like you ever…"

"Renji, it isn't what you think."

Renji stared, realizing suddenly that Byakuya's concern was not what he had expected and feeling guilt wash over him at having misjudged him.

"I didn't mean that there was anything wrong with your apartment. I merely said that because first of all, I am not accustomed to sleeping without clothing and secondly, I do not enjoy having your friends charging in and dragging me out of bed, sans clothing."

Renji had to bite his tongue to keep from laughing. He tried to picture Ichigo and Rukia bursting in on poor Byakuya and couldn't quite suppress a laugh.

It sounded strange to hear Byakuya's voice laughing. Byakuya gazed at him intently, absorbing the sound and wearing a deeply curious expression. He stepped closer and traced the small smile that had risen on the pale, soft lips. His eyes met the smoky gray ones that looked back at him with Renji's spirit beneath them.

"This is what it looks like…when…"

"It doesn't happen very often, Taichou," Renji said, his voice barely above a whisper, "but yeah, this is what you look like when you smile."

The warm fingers curled around and into the black, silken hair as Byakuya pulled Renji closer. For the first time he remembered it ever happening, Renji found himself frozen in place, unable to fidget. He stared into the intense brown eyes, feeling Byakuya's reiatsu swirling around him.

He wasn't sure who finally closed the distance, who initiated the meeting of their lips. He only knew that the feeling of their lips pressing against each other, of their mouths opening slightly to taste each other, stole the breath from him lungs and made his legs weaken beneath him. The brown eyes closed and Renji could feel the collision and connection of their reiatsu as the gentle kiss deepened and became more hungry and passionate. The room had gone silent around them except for the soft hiss as they exhaled against each other's skin. He could feel Byakuya trembling softly and the pressure of their hardened members through their clothing. He felt Byakuya begin to pull away, but ached to have the pleasant exchange continue. His hands took hold of the tanned arms and he turned Byakuya. And the next thing he knew they were falling onto Byakuya's bed. He held his taichou down and kissed him again and again. Open palms pressed against his chest and he looked down into the hazed, unsteady eyes, waiting for the inevitable rejection.

"Renji," Byakuya whispered, watching as disappointment rose into the other's eyes, "We should stop."

Renji sighed, turning his head away, trying to hide his disappointment. Byakuya slid a hand under his chin, turning the dark eyes back to his.

"We should stop because…when we make love, I want for us to be ourselves."

Renji felt his heart skip and his breath catch painfully.

"Y-you…you said…when," he stammered.

He could have died as the warm lips found his again and whispered the sweet words into his mouth.

"Yes…I said when…"