I do not own nor do I make profit off of Twilight. All rights belong to its author Stephanie Meyer.
Hey Everyone! I know I said I wasn't going to post the 21st but would post the 28th , well here's the deal, someone messaged me to tell me this story as added to a community called The Absolute Worst of the Worst, and I have to say this might be it for me. I'm very okay with people not liking my work or giving it negative reviews or constructive criticism (all constructive criticism I have taken and fixed with a polite thank you) but at the moment, mentally I think it's a bit too much for me. I know I should be okay with this and just roll my eyes and keep going and usually I would but... Things are hard for me right now and I can't really take much. People in my own life have been pretty delicate with me lately and I'm working on it. I went and read the creator of this community and I guess I broke a rule, but I don't know which one. I understand my grammar in the beginning of this story wasn't great, but I'm been trying to work on it. I also understand there are a few dark chapters that may be to adult for this site and I thought a trigger warning was enough, but most likely not. I've chosen not to message this person and just accept it as that's kind of where my head is right now, just complacency. Theirs a lot swirling around in my head right now that I'm finding hard to organize and get done. I usually work on stories throughout the week during free time and then spend Saturday nights editing and posting, but I don't know...I don't want to do it, especially if it's the worst of the worst. I have a few chapters from the first Twilight book ready and written, but I needed to get these last 10 chapters out before we moved on...but I just don't know.
I'm going to post what I have written now and then turn off this site until Friday just to get my bearings and have a chance to decompress and sort some things out. I haven't made a decision on deleting anything yet, (especially if I've broken a rule, I know some chapter are quite dark and that may be it) but it's definitely on my mind and it's important I be honest with you, before I do it.
(P.S I will post reviews either Friday or Saturday, to thank you all properly for the last chapter, I'm sorry I don't have it in me today)
Remember, you are loved and you are wanted!
Until next time Coffee.
Plane Tickets?
When I wake up, I'm alone. My eyes are soar and my face feels slightly swollen, a reminder of the last time I was awake. I groan rolling over to my side. Carlisle must be home based on the position I'm in, I hate sleeping on my back,
"You're awake?" Speak of the devil. I roll to my other side finding Carlisle in the doorway, based on the way he's dressed he's been home for a while, jeans and a comfy sweater,
"What time is it?"
"Ten till three." I roll my eyes before forcing myself to sit up and rub my puffy cheek,
"I don't think I can sleep anymore."
"How about we start by staying up the rest of the day and then trying an early bedtime." Carlisle suggests stepping into the room, "Esme would be happy to wake you up at a reasonable time tomorrow?" I nod, "Are you hungry? I'm afraid I'm going to have to insist on eating, Esme's made a nice tortilla soup, it's homemade, but she did buy store-bought chips and salsa. You can eat whatever you're comfortable consuming." It feels like years ago when I became scared of food, and even longer when I found out I was allergic to most shellfish, and yet..I don't care anymore. I turn toward Carlisle and shrug,
"Can I eat downstairs...at the kitchen island?" Carlisle smiles,
"Absolutely," he stands, holding out his hand, I stare at it for a minute before taking it and letting him pull me to my feet. My knees shake again, but this time Carlisle pulls me close letting me lean on him,
"I'm sorry," I mumble,
"That weak feeling won't last, you'll build your strength up again." I sigh,
"Yay, yay." Carlisle chuckles holding me close as we make our way out the door and down the hall to the stairs, "Did you have a good day at work." I ask reaching for the staircase railing."
"It was okay, busy. Did you and Esme have a good day?" My grip on the stair railing tightens..does he know..of course, he knows, Esme doesn't keep secrets from him. I relax my hand and nod,
"It was fine." I take the stairs one at a time, Carlisle's hand on my back, a reassuring gesture of his presence, when I'm halfway down I stop,
"Sweetheart?"
"She tell you?" Carlisle's hand moves from my back to my bicep and turns me to face him,
"Mare, sweetheart, when you're ready to talk to me, we'll talk. At this moment I know enough and that's how it will remain okay?" He knows. I take a breath and nod,
"Okay." Carlisle squeezes my bicep and urges me forward.
...
When we get to the kitchen, Esme is waiting with a steaming bowl on the counter, a small bowl of chips next to it along with a small glass ramekin of salsa. She smiles at me and places a glass of ice water next to the soup,
"Are you hungry honey?" I nod,
"Kinda." Carlisle pushes me towards my normal seat and I can't help all the feelings rushing back. Days ago I never thought I would see this house again, lay in my bed, sit in this seat, eat Esme's cooking...and here we are.
"Let me know if you want any tortillas, I didn't make them. I have flour and corn." I pick up the spoon and shake my head,
"This is fine Esme." I stir the soup letting the melted cheese on top sink to the bottom, she's put black beans and shredded chicken in here and the minute I take a bite, I'm hungry. I don't know the last time I ate, maybe three days or four, but I'm starving and quickly finish the bowl before asking for more. Esme smiles and takes the dish away returning with an even bigger helping.
"Mare?" Carlisle questions as I dig into my second bowl,
"Yes."
"There is something we would like to talk with you about, would it be okay if we talk while you eat?" I take a bite and shrug
"Yay." With a gentle smile, Carlisle grabs a folded slip of paper from his back pocket and slides it over. I set my spoon down and pick it up, "Plane tickets for Italy?"