And I'm back again. Sorry to leave you hanging but real life keeps getting in the way, how dare it! Then there's that horrid thing called writers block that just won't leave me alone. It's taken a walk right now so I thought I'd take the chance to write before it returns for supper.

Disclaimer: I own nothing!

Chapter Twenty Five

By Rosa241

George POV:

I can't help smiling as I think back to last night.

Honestly it felt magical (corny I know).

My whole world felt like it was finally pulling together after all these years.

Smiling into my coffee I feel my mind sinking back to last night.

Flashback

We finally pull our lips apart after what feels like hours. For a moment he simply stares at me before a small smile crosses his lips. I can feel my own lips pulling into a smile as I gaze at him. Something in my chest feels warm as everything I've wanted for so long feels like it's coming together at last.

"You didn't pull away." He whispers the words so quietly that I almost miss them.

"You thought I would?" For a moment he doesn't answer my question but after a beat he nods his head. How could he think that? "Why would you think that?"

He sighs and I almost think I've lost him but he doesn't pull away. Instead he kisses me one last time before taking my hand and moving the two of us over to the couch. We sit in silence for a few minutes and as much as I want to say something I don't. Something inside tells me he needs to think.

"I'm not a good person." His voice shocks me and has me nearly jumping out of my skin. "I'm not a good person. Believe me George I'm not. I've got demons in my past, a lot of demons and I can't ever get rid of them. There's a hell of a lot of crap I'm carrying that's always going to follow me around and you don't need that. You don't need me dragging you down, even if you don't realise it now you will eventually. You need someone better than me."

"Stop telling me what you think I need. I am so sick of people telling me what I need, why don't you listen to what I want?" My words get his attention and I continue. "I want you. I want to be with you. I don't care what you think, I don't care if you think you're a terrible person I know differently. You're a good person and I know it. I just want you."

Before I can breathe his lips are on mine and his arms wrap around my waist. My own link around his neck as I pull he towards me, I need him closer. I need him closer to me.

End Flashback

We'd spent the rest of the night together, mostly getting to know each other's lips, before reluctantly separating. If this was going to work us jumping into bed together wasn't the right way to get started.

Despite the happiness in my chest another feeling, one of worry, has been creeping in. His words last night are definitely something I'm not comfortable with. The way that he talked about himself was so…wrong that I actually can't quite place the way I feel.

How could he possibly believe those things he said about himself?

I'm not a good person.

Are you kidding me?

Alex is a doctor. I don't claim to know a lot, if anything really, about his family life but I know enough to realise it wasn't a pleasant one. He came through whatever crap he had and he made it as a doctor. He became a great doctor. How can he say he's not a good person when he goes out of his way to save lives?

I'm damaged.

Aren't we all? Don't we all have baggage and crap in our past that drags us down? We're all damaged in our own way. Maybe he's a little more damaged than me but that doesn't mean we shouldn't be together. I care about him more than I care about his past.

Shaking my head I force the darker thoughts from my mind and focus on the feeling that ran through me when we kissed.

I've never felt like that before.

Alex POV:

Alex you are such an idiot!

Don't get me wrong those kisses were amazing but I still shouldn't have done it. I've managed to push my feelings for him to one side for so long I should have been better. I should have listened to my gut and pushed my feelings away. I shouldn't have kissed him…no matter how good it felt.

Everything I've felt for so long just came pouring out of me. I just couldn't keep it contained it anymore honestly it's like the damn just freaking broke. I should have stopped it. I should have stopped it but I just didn't want to.

It's not that I didn't want to kiss him, everything within me wanted to kiss him, I just shouldn't have done it. It's not fair on him. Kissing him gives him hope, kissing him makes him believe that we can be together makes him believe that we can be a couple. We can never be a couple. It'd never work.

"So stupid." I mutter as I turn the tap off. Drying my hands I shake my head, ridding my mind of those thoughts, before heading out of the bathroom.

I can't focus on my job if I'm thinking about George all the time. I've already been screamed at by Bailey this morning, keep this up and I'll be walking out that door before long. The image of that poor girl lying on the ground enters my mind and I can't stop the guilt that seeps back into me.

It wasn't my fault.

I know that it wasn't my fault but that doesn't stop me from feeling guilty about it. She was just a little girl and now she's dead. It wasn't my fault, wasn't anyone's fault really, but that doesn't help.

"Dr Karev did you have a late night or an early one?" Sloan's teasing voice does nothing but anger me further as I step out of the bathroom. He betrayed me.

"Get lost Sloan." I know he and Meredith meant well but that doesn't mean they did the right thing. They should have stayed out of it and left well alone.

"Ooh touchy. I presume the grouchiness I'm on the receiving end of is because of the late night you and O'Malley had." Ordinarily I'd give as good as I get. Ordinarily I'd actually quite enjoy our friendship but right now I want nothing more than for him to get lost.

"Leave me the hell alone!" I growl out as I storm away from him.

"What did I do?" He yells after me but I pay him no attention. He and Meredith shouldn't have said anything to George, they shouldn't have done this. Mark shouldn't have said anything. He shouldn't have.

They've ruined everything.

And I think I'll leave it there for now. I really wanted to show you just how the two of them are feeling after their kiss(es). George is all loved up but poor Alex is convinced that this relationship is doomed, poor baby is sure that he's not good enough for George.

Well we're just going to have to convince him otherwise!

Until next time!