KOTODAMA

"The soul that resides within words."

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Chapter V

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"When I wasn't able to believe in anything anymore, you appeared, and reminded me that believing is the faith that brought us back together."

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Deadly quiet, and time and time again, InuYasha reprimanded himself for doing such an impulsive act. The girl of the purse, whose name he knew from her documents, was following him while ceaselessly asking him questions. He had gone in her help for a reason he didn't want to answer to himself yet, while not even being sure if the woman needed said help in the first place. With such thoughts, he looked back through the corners of his eyes, for he'd been walking half-step ahead of her this whole time, and despite knowing he could easily lose her if he wanted to, for some reason he still kept that half-step of distance. The streetlights were now on, completely, and he hoped to arrive to the station soon, and so leave that place he shouldn't have come to, finding impossible to explain what was that attraction he felt towards her. It wasn't a physical attraction, but something more and quite close to reverie, which inevitably made him recall the "utopic girl" Jakotsu had talked about before. That was his illusion, an idealization that went from physical beauty to the most beautiful of souls.

And yes, he knew such a thing was almost a cliché.

"Will you not answer me?" He heard behind him. "Say something."

It was hard to answer to any of the questions the girl had voiced, for every single one were logical yet also unsustainable because of how absurd the entire situation was. He couldn't begin to understand how that woman didn't start running, desperately, as soon as some stranger appeared and helped her to be freed of the circumstances she was suffering under that man; an act done, on top of that, in an absolutely possessive manner.

"Stop right there, and stop following me." He halted his steps so abruptly, the girl almost tripped, and had to intently regain her balance.

She looked at him then, insistent, which made him wish he could just disappear into any of the elements composing the street they were walking on.

"Your hair, has it always been silvery?"

There it was, a new question in front of him. For some reason, she seemed to believe he had some sort of duty to satiate her curiosity.

"Why are you following me?" He insisted, his gaze fixed on the girl, his heart beating faster, pounding against the walls of his chest.

He had to shift the focus of his attention then, out of cowardice or survival, or maybe both, he didn't know. He looked at one of the houses along the street in an attempt to calm, in some form, the frenetic pace of his thoughts.

"You are carrying my purse."

"It's that an answer?" He asked, internally. He looked at her again, feeling a bit braver than an instant before, seeking, without much success, the meaning behind the statement she just voiced.

"That's right. I'm carrying your purse. Have you even bothered asking yourself why?" He rebuked, having the sensation that girl was way too reckless.

"Of course I'm wondering why."

"Thank goodness." There was some sanity in all of this. "Yet despite not knowing why, you are still following me."

"I am. You see, I could guess many reasons, yet you are the only one who can give me an answer." She was stubborn too.

A thick silence found place between them next, their gazed locked onto each other in an attempt to catch a glimpse of that hint of sanity that may hold the answer of why they were really there.

It wasn't time to understand it yet.

All the while, Kagome was split between allure and anxiety

Her eyes followed his movements as he took off the purse that until then had remained across his chest, only to keep it close, still hanging from his hand, as if unwilling to give it up. Finally, he extended it towards her, his beautiful features sternly frozen. He was infinitely more beautiful than what she could draw, and as magnificent as he was in the images inside her mind.

"Here." He handed her the purse, as if losing something incredibly valuable.

"Are my drawings inside?" She found herself asking, almost out of inertia.

During the first days after the robbery, she felt all her world had been inside that folder with sketches in different states. However, now that she'd met him, the drawings became but accessories; she had the feeling that the InuYasha of her mind had become real, and she ironized the idea by thinking that if such a thing were indeed possible, it must have been because of one of the wishes she had made during her past birthdays.

"Yes, everything is in there." The answer came from the worst mood possible, as if he was the one being robbed. "There are only four hundred yen missing, because of the kid. Don't hold it against him."

"I won't, don't worry." With that money, she could buy a coffee and little else. She took the purse by the belt. "Do you know the boy of the red hair-string?"

She saw him nodding, stern and with just one movement. Both were now holding the purse.

"Do you like the purse?" Kagome had to ask, for she found strange that reticence to give it up. "I only want my documents and drawings; you can have the purse."

His gazed changed then, and she became aware of it, of the way his eyes widened, as if not willing to believe someone would ever gift him something.

"Here, you can have it." She let go of the belt, and he remained there for a moment, the purse only hanging from his hand.

"No, it's yours." He extended it to her again, determined.

"Look, just give me the drawings, the documents and that's it. You can have the purse; I made it myself, so I can just make another." Everything she said was true.

InuYasha couldn't believe this girl was letting go of her belongings just like that, without asking for anything in return. By his experience, one always had to give something in exchange.

"This smells fishy." He stated, becoming suspicious without being able to help it. "Nothing is ever free."

The girl seemed surprised for a moment, then she furrowed her brow slightly, as if thinking it wouldn't be noticed.

"Well, now that you say that, I've yet to have dinner, and I'm hungry. "The statement came with a funny gesture of her hand highlighting the shape of her waist.

"Are you asking me to invite you to dinner?" He tried to made clear.

"I am. Albeit I'd be the one paying with the money I had in my wallet, I don't want you to return it to me, for I already thought it lost. I've already told you, I just want the drawings and the documents. "She said, more to herself than to anyone else, then added, "Is your name really InuYasha?"

His lips parted to answer, yet remained still for a moment, for he was surprised by the number of words she could say per minute.

"It is." He confirmed. "Why?"

Kagome seemed to hesitate, then she shook her head and smiled slightly.

"Nothing." Her gaze acquired such warmth, he believed himself invaded by the first light of spring. "So, will you take me to dinner?"

The answer got caught in his throat. All of his logic was telling him this didn't make sense, the same way it didn't make sense to had followed her and to know where she lived. Even so, he found himself considering it despite knowing as much.

"I could, but right now I have a few hours of work ahead." He explained. It was true.

"Oh."

"That's right." Freedom seemed to have come at last; she'd go her way, and he would go his, yet such prospect didn't make him feel relieved. "Here, have your stuff."

He introduced his hand inside the bag to bring out the folder with her drawings.

"And? Will you take long? With work, I mean."

Her chestnut brown gaze had a hint of hope. The complex part was that he himself wanted to say that he wouldn't, that it'd take just a bit and they'd be able to go eat something afterwards.

"Don't worry, I understand." She grabbed the folder with the drawings, and embraced it. There was no space for them in the purse she was carrying now.

"I could drop by your house later, around ten, and we could go eat something inside one of the izakayas you have nearby." He mentioned, almost as quickly as her speech. "Fuck, I sound like a damn stalker." He dropped his gaze inside the purse, seeking her documents to hand them over.

"I mean, you are. A bit."

He lifted his gaze upon hearing her words, words that could have ended any attempt at approach, but that turned into a smile and into acceptance instead, the latter coming to him not without reticence. He was aware of his own weird behavior, ever since the purse had come into his hands and finding those drawings seemingly made in his image. However, it hadn't been until today, when that man with her sought something more than just someone to take a walk with, that he felt the need to claim and protect this girl. And that was the strange part.

"You... did you know me?" He needed to ask, did so in the moment he handed her the documents.

For an instant she seemed to pale, her lips pressed into a thin line while her eyes dropped on some spot on the ground. Finally, she found his gaze again, and talked, "You've seen the drawings." She confirmed rather than inquired, her voice a sigh.

He nodded, slowly. He really wanted to spend the rest of the night with her, yet he also needed the money he'd get from those couple of hours of work.

"No, I've never seen you before." Her lips were pressed into a line again, while she looked at one of the drawings inside the folder. "Just here." She pointed to the right side of her head with a finger.

They remained there, observing each other for a moment. Yes, he wanted to remain there and unravel that mystery this girl meant to him.

"I have to go." If he were to take any longer, he would lose the jobs coming after these ones.

"My name is Kagome." She reminded him.

"I know..."

Having said that, he took two steps backward, to put some distance, then stopped when a thought popped inside his mind, a question to which he knew the answer: Did he want to see her again?

"I'll come back tomorrow." He offered, and received a nod from her part, her lower lip bitten in a show of uncertainty.

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Kagome was looking at the roof of her room, not willing to accept her own taken decision. She had arrived at her apartment a few hours ago, and was now lying on her bed, the past events replaying in her head step by step; the strange conversation she had with that boy carrying her purse, her main focus. It was unconceivable to her the fact that she missed so many warnings to her own safety when talking to him, and seeking answers without knowing what kind of person he was. However, there was an unsettling sensation in her chest that was making her trust him more than what logic dictated.

Yet despite it, she didn't dare accept his proposal of dropping by at ten o'clock to go have some dinner. If she thought about it, her biggest fear was what Ayumi would say, what she would ask, and the prospect of not being able to answer her doubts. Probably, because she lacked the answers herself.

She looked at the time in her phone. It was soon to be nine. She sighed, and closed her eyes for a moment, recalling in full the curiosity painted on the boy's features when she invited him to grab some dinner.

"What was I thinking?" She asked herself.

"I don't know, woman." The character inside her head spoke. Curiously, she pictured him with a pleasant smile, she could even say almost as if tempered by time.

"Oh, shut up." She answered him, out loud.

She decided it'd be best to finally prepare some dinner, and she hoped to be able to see boy with her purse tomorrow, just like he promised. She was still having a hard time calling him by name.

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Three days went by without Kagome knowing anything about the boy who had promised her to come back the next day to their last encounter. A part of her, thought the lie a given, for the situation spoke volumes about the limbo the man seemed to live in, between social order and criminal chaos, for he was acquaintance with a delinquent in his teens, after all. The other side of herself, the one who accepted him at first glance, was vibrating inside of her, saying something must have happened. Maybe that was the reason why she was keeping herself busy by attempting to draw him again; him meaning the character inside her head, she reminded herself. The difference was getting more and more blurry by the day.

After hours of drawing, she managed a sequence of pictures she'd drawn before, but less detailed. Her character, the one she could see inside her head, laid punctured by an arrow against a tree, sacred and a thousand years old, considered by many to contain the wisdom of time. The boy seemed to be asleep, and the strong roots of the tree had grown around his figure, holding him safely in what appeared to be an eternal sleep. The first time she had had that vision and drew it, she was unable to portray herself observing him just like the scene looked in her mind. To draw herself in that scenario felt strange to her, out of what was logical, yet today she was able to introduce her own figure in the page she'd been looking to create, and due to the age she felt she had in the picture, she drew herself wearing her high school uniform.

Observing the sheet, she stood up to change her perspective, putting some distance between her and the drawing, and suddenly felt overwhelmed by the precision with which her character's features and the boy she'd met a few days ago, had melted together. Such a feeling made its way to her heart, and found nest there; it was one of those feelings she couldn't give a name to, it was a warning of a change that she couldn't discern if it was good or bad. It was an event, something to watch out for, something to observe. She closed her eyes, and took a deep breath in an attempt to calm such impression, and decided it was time to take a bath, for it would surely help her get rid of that uncertainty. For some reason, she had always felt that water could purify her and take with it the residual energy of her dark thoughts.

Before using the common bathroom, she went to Ayumi's room.

"What are you doing?" She asked her. The girl laid on her bed, face down with a tablet in her hands.

"I'm reading a seinen I started recently." She showed her the picture on the tablet.

"Which one?" She got closer to get a better look.

"This one." This time, the tablet displayed the cover.

"Oh, I've heard about it. First time I see the drawing style though." She commented. "How's the story?"

"So far, so good." She smiled, and corrected her posture on the bed to look at her better. "And what about you? Have you done something?"

"Yeah, something." The character inside her head was her most intimate secret, and she kept him from everyone else at all times.

"Do you wanna go out? It's good for you to take some fresh air from time to time." Ayumi offered, knowing the extents to which Kagome could become self-absorbed when she was creating something.

"No, thanks. I want to keep with my drawing." She started towards the door. "I'm going to take a shower."

"Alright. I'll prepare some dinner."

"Nope, today is my turn." She smiled at her from door, and heard her acceptance.

She crossed the little hallway to her room, and once there her gaze went back to her drawings. She tried to focus on the minor details, and recalled the kind of leaves the Goshinboku had, the sacred tree in which her character as nailed to. She inhaled deeply then, taking in that feeling of a job well done, and without warning, in her mind she heard her own name, pronounced in a particular way that only her character used, and only then she realized his voice sounded just like the boy with her purse.

"Kagome... what have you been doing?" The question had a nostalgic hint, it was charged by the yearning only loneliness knows, and she realized this was a reunion that was long due.

She wasn't sure about which part of her story she was seeing inside her head, yet the urge to draw it possessed her in a heartbeat.

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To be continued.

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A/N

I hope you've liked it, and that you tell me in he comments, for I love to read your impressions of the story so far.

A kiss,

Anyara.

This text is possible thanks to the translation of: Dezart