After Liv's appointment with her OB-GYN, she drove herself and Rafa to the courthouse, where they were due to meet with Martha before she was put on the stand once again.
Aware that whilst Liv was relieved the baby was okay, she was also shocked and overwhelmed, Rafa sought to distract her by discussing Martha's upcoming Court appearance. Liv was immediately engaged in the conversation, which provided her with a distraction from her confused thoughts. It almost came as a surprise to her when she pulled into the courthouse parking lot and got out of her car, walking calmly with Rafa towards the staircase as they headed to his office.
Rafa placed his overnight bag behind his desk and adjusted his tie, before placing his briefcase on his desk and removing his laptop.
"Can I get you some coffee?" Rafa asked Liv, who was standing in front of his desk, her expression rather dazed. She blinked and turned towards him at the sound of his voice, the look on her face confirming she had not heard a word. "Coffee?" he repeated patiently. Liv shook her head.
"No thanks" she responded quietly. Rafa offered her a small smile and walked around his desk.
"Liv, I-"
Before Rafa could continue there was a knock at the door, and his secretary entered the room with Martha, who looked tired and worried. Liv walked towards her instinctively, offering her a warm smile and placing a comforting hand upon her shoulder.
"Hey, Martha" Liv greeted, her voice soft and kind.
Rafa watched with a combination of admiration and concern as Liv's entire demeanour changed almost immediately; she'd gone from being worried and distracted to focused and protective. As he watched Liv comfort Martha, who relaxed visibly in her presence, he felt a pang of sadness as he wondered how many times in the past couple of months Liv had suppressed her own worries to focus on taking care of someone else. And how many times he had missed it.
After receiving reassurances and comfort from Liv, Rafa gently announced it was time to head to the courtroom. Martha agreed with a wordless nod, and the three of them walked out of Rafa's office and headed towards the elevator. The brief descent to the ground floor was filled with the comforting sound of Liv's voice, as she reminded Martha how strong she was; how she'd survived the ordeal, she had reported her abuser, and she had testified in Court.
"You've already done the hardest part" Liv reminded her again, as the elevator came to a stop. "You can do this" she assured her. "And I'll be right there with you" she added.
A sad smile played on Martha's lips and she nodded, as Liv placed her arm around her and walked her towards the courthouse.
Martha's ordeal on the stand was thankfully short and mercifully brief. The defence's attempts to confuse and upset her were unsuccessful, due to Rafael Barba's strong and wholly justified objections, and the comforting presence of Olivia Benson, who was sitting in the front row. Martha repeated her claims through tear-stained eyes, the attack on her character and integrity turning her initial fear at testifying into rage. She stared at the defendant with an icy expression as she recounted her ideal once more, her story not changing, her account consistent and resolute. When the defence finally surrendered, having failed to tear apart the account of the victim they perceived to be the weakest link and infuriating several jurors in their attempt, Martha walked calmly across the courtroom. Rafa caught her eye and offered her a comforting half-smile, as he heard Liv rise to her feet behind him.
"You did great" Liv said quietly, "let's get you home" she added, putting her arm around Martha and leading her quickly out of the courtroom. Martha clamped her hand to her mouth and held her breath, grateful that she managed to leave the room before bursting into tears, and seeking refuge in Liv's arms.
After driving Martha home and staying with her for a short while, Liv headed to the precinct, arriving shortly before ten-thirty. She quickly finished and sent the email she was composing to the Captain of the Bronx SVU, sending it just moments after she stepped into the squad room. She greeted her team, who looked up from their computers and responded.
"How's Martha?" asked Fin as Liv headed towards her office.
"A little shaken, but she's okay" Liv replied. "She stood her ground in Court, and Barba didn't let the defence intimidate her" she added. "Any good will they had with the jury was well and truly destroyed after they recalled her to the stand" she stated, offering Fin a small smile as she walked into her office.
After watching Liv head into her office, Amanda picked up some mail and a casefile from her desk.
"You got anything for Liv to sign?" she asked Fin.
"Nah" Fin responded, as he returned his attentions towards his computer. Amanda nodded and followed Liv into her office, closing the door behind her.
Liv placed her handbag on her desk and removed her laptop, glancing up as Amanda entered.
"Hi" Liv said warmly, as she placed her handbag on the floor and sat down at her desk.
"Hi" Amanda responded, watching Liv closely as she walked cautiously towards her desk. "Are you okay?" she asked tentatively.
"I'm fine" Liv said calmly, meeting Amanda's gaze as she sat down opposite her. "And so is the baby" she added. Amanda relaxed visibly and she smiled, her eyes lighting up as she did so. Liv could not help but smile in response.
"Thank God" Amanda breathed, her relief evident from her tone and expression. "That's great, Liv" she beamed. Liv nodded, as the familiar sensation of anxiety and anticipation rose within her.
"It is" she confirmed. "I still can't believe it" she admitted. "Given everything that has happened with this pregnancy so far I was so convinced one of the tests would be positive" she continued, her voice trailing off slightly as she spoke. "I didn't think the baby being okay was even an option" she added.
"Or maybe you were too scared to think that it was, just in case" Amanda said gently. Liv nodded in response.
"With my assault, the bleeding, the complications associated with my age" Liv began, not quite able to meet Amanda's gaze as she spoke. "It didn't seem possible" she breathed.
"But it was" Amanda smiled. "It is" she added. "Your baby is fine, Liv" she stated. Liv smiled softly and nodded. "So are you gonna tell Barba?" she asked gently. Liv looked down for a moment, and Amanda instantly regretted asking the question. "I mean, you've only just got the results, so it's understandable if you need more time-"
"Actually, I don't need more time" Liv said slowly, meeting Amanda's gaze as she spoke. "Because Rafa already knows that I'm pregnant" she stated. Amanda's eyes widened.
"What?" she asked, shocked. "You told him?"
"No" Liv replied. "He figured it out" she explained. Amanda frowned and shook her head.
"How?" she asked. "When?"
"On Friday night" Liv replied carefully, as she prepared herself for what was to come. "When I collapsed in his office."
Liv then told Amanda about the events since Friday night, from waking up in the hospital with a very worried Rafa by her bedside, to her anaemia diagnosis and the weekend they spent together, which ended with the visit to her OB-GYN earlier that morning. Amanda listened in silence, nodding encouragingly at intervals, as Liv filled her in.
"It sounds like Barba is being really supportive" Amanda said gently. "He's clearly real protective of you and the baby."
"Yeah, he is" Liv agreed, smiling softly. "Obviously, there's a lot we need to talk about" she added, worry entering her voice. "I've asked Lucy to pick Noah up from school tomorrow afternoon and keep him overnight" she added. Amanda nodded.
"That's good" Amanda replied reassuringly. "It'll give you both time to talk."
"Yeah" Liv breathed, lowering her eyes from Amanda's as she spoke. Amanda tilted her head to the side slightly as she watched Liv.
"What's wrong?" Amanda asked gently.
"Nothing" Liv replied. "I just..." she continued, breaking off as she struggled to find the words. "I can't help but feel guilty" she added. Amanda watched her for a few moments to see if she would elaborate, and when she didn't she spoke.
"About what?" Amanda asked, confusion present in her tone. "About not telling him sooner? Or being pregnant in the first place?"
"Both" Liv admitted. Amanda leaned back in her chair.
"You had a real good reason for the first, a reason he understood and forgave you for" Amanda reminded her. "And as for the second, he's fifty per cent responsible" she added. Liv scoffed and nodded. "Liv, you have nothing to feel guilty about" she assured her. Liv swallowed hard and remained silent for a few moments.
"Everything is just so complicated" Liv said quietly. "Rafa and I are still trying to figure out what type of relationship we have and where it's going, and now we're gonna have a baby" she added, worry present in her voice. "Before today I was so convinced that I was going to lose this pregnancy one way or another" she continued, her voice adopting a sad edge. "This morning, when I found out the baby is perfectly healthy, it's like I realised for the first time that I would be having a baby" she added. Amanda nodded slowly in response.
"That's completely understandable" she assured her. Liv looked up at her friend with worried eyes.
"Maybe" Liv conceded. "Rafa and I are going to talk about everything tomorrow" she stated. "And then I'll have to tell Noah, he'll have to tell his mother, we'll both have to tell our bosses-"
"Liv, hey, breathe" Amanda interjected. "You don't have to do all of those things at once. You can take it one step at a time."
"Time isn't something we have" Liv said quietly. "This baby is gonna be here in five months" she stated. "It's like I've been in limbo until this morning" she continued, her words escaping her lips before she had a chance to control them. "All I can think about is, am I forcing Rafa to be a father? Does he want a baby? If he does, does he want one with me? Will Noah want a sibling? What if he doesn't? We're gonna have to move to a bigger apartment-"
"Liv, slow down, stop" Amanda soothed, her kind eyes meeting her friend's worried ones. "Those are all natural things for you to worry about. And I get that they're all hitting you at once, and it's scary" she empathised. "But every single one of those things is going to be alright. You and Barba will figure everything out" she assured her. "He loves you, Liv. And he will love this baby. And a big reason of why he will love it is because of you" she stated. Liv swallowed hard and nodded imperceptibly.
"I hope you're right" Liv said quietly, as she quickly tried to recover herself. She was about to change the subject when Amanda's voice drew her attentions back towards her.
"What was it like, at the weekend?" Amanda began, prompting Liv to look up at her. "With Barba staying with you and Noah, and spending the whole weekend together?" she asked. She'd seen the way Liv's eyes lit up and her entire demeanour changed when she spoke about the time she and Noah had spent with Barba.
"It was wonderful" Liv admitted, smiling sadly as she spoke. "Noah adores Rafa, and Rafa is great with him" she stated. "It felt so natural and effortless" she continued. "I didn't want it to end" she stated. Amanda watched Liv with a knowing look, and smiled.
"And what does that tell you?" Amanda asked gently. Liv smiled sombrely as she considered her friend's question.
"That I need to take some time to think about everything" she replied. "And we really need to talk."
Despite the fact Liv desperately wanted some time alone to think about her baby, her relationship with Rafa and the next steps, the days which followed were busy and passed far too quickly. The squad caught a new case involving a taxi driver who was abducting and raping businesswomen on the upper West Side. He assaulted two victims in four days, the second attack so violent it left the victim in a coma. All of Liv's attentions were on the case, which her squad were working on tirelessly.
Liv did not see Rafa on Monday or Tuesday morning. He'd called her on Monday evening to check in on her and confirm their plans to meet the following night. They agreed he would come to Liv's after work and she would make them dinner and they would talk. The next time she spoke to him was on Tuesday afternoon at her request. She updated him on the taxi driver case and explained that they had been able to trace the cab company using footage taken outside the office of the second victim. As Liv was talking Rafa through the case, with Fin and Amanda adding details and answering Rafa's questions, she was struck by how normal this felt. She didn't feel awkward or embarrassed around Rafa; she felt the same excited anticipation when he stepped into the squadroom, carrying his trademark coffee and briefcase, walking calmly towards the board and asking for an update.
"Can you get us warrants for the employee records of the cab company?" Liv asked hopefully.
"Absolutely" Rafa confirmed, taking a sip of his coffee as he spoke. "I'll go see Judge Barth now, and email them straight to you, you'll have them in an hour" he stated.
"Thank you" Liv replied.
"Thanks, counsellor" Fin added, before heading towards Amanda. "You comin' to lunch?" he asked.
"Yeah" Amanda confirmed, picking up her jacket from the back of her chair. "Liv? Counsellor?"
"No thanks" Liv replied.
"Thank you, but I need to head back to the courthouse and get these warrants issued" Barba replied. Amanda nodded, before thanking Barba and walking out of the squadroom with Fin.
Once Amanda and Fin had left, Rafa turned towards Liv.
"You okay?" he asked, posing the question that he had clearly been desperate to ask since he arrived.
"I'm fine" Liv assured him, offering him a smile.
"You seem tired" Rafa said gently.
"Thank you" Liv replied sarcastically, amusement present in her tone. Rafa pressed his lips together and nodded. "It's been a long couple of days, that's all" she assured him. "I'm fine" she repeated. Rafa considered her closely for a moment before nodding.
"I'll get you those warrants" Rafa replied. "And I'll see to tonight" he added. Liv smiled and nodded.
"You will" Liv confirmed. Rafa nodded and took another sip of his coffee, before turning to leave the squadroom. "Thank you" Liv said quickly, her voice prompting him to turn back towards her.
"You already thanked me for the warrants" Rafa reminded her. "Warrants which, as of yet, I have not got for you" he added lightly.
"I wasn't thanking you for the warrants" she added quietly. Rafa's expression softened and he took a step towards her, curiosity present in his expression, as his eyes met hers. "Thank you for... for everything. For being so understanding and supportive" she continued, her voice low, almost embarrassed. It was the first time she had seen Rafa following their doctor's appointment and subsequent attendance at Court, and as soon as they were alone together she felt an almost overwhelming need to express her gratitude for his kindness and understanding, for everything, once more.
"Of course" Rafa said gently, his voice and demeanour warm and reassuring. "You're sure you're alright?"
"Yes" Liv smiled. "Sorry" she added with embarrassment.
"Please don't apologise" Rafa said softly, prompting Liv to meet his gaze. He placed his hand gently on her upper arm and squeezed it comfortingly. "Liv, you have nothing to be sorry for" he assured her. Liv swallowed thickly and nodded. "Okay?"
"Okay" Liv agreed. "Warrants. Please" she added. Rafa watched her for a few moments before nodding.
"Yes, your highness" he replied, deadpan, earning a small scoff from Liv as he turned and headed out of the squadroom once more.
"If you could get us warrants to search all the cabs too, that would be great" Liv called after him. Rafa paused, threw his head back in feigned annoyance, and then nodded, responding with a faux-weary "yes" before heading back out of the squadroom. Liv smiled to herself and walked back to her office.
As Rafa promised, the warrants were issued less than an hour after he left the precinct. Fin and Amanda led the search of the cabs, and dealt with the company owner who was furious at having to recall all his drivers and vehicles with immediate effect. Liv spent the majority of the afternoon reviewing the records of the company employees and owners, which Rafa had also thoughtfully included in the warrant. She would have spent longer delving into their history had she not had to return home in anticipation of her dinner with Rafa.
When Liv opened her front door to Rafa shortly after six o'clock, it felt like just minutes had passed since they spoke in the squadroom. He was wearing the same black pinstripe suit and charcoal grey tie, and was carrying his briefcase and a brown paper grocery bag.
"Hey" Rafa greeted, the side of his mouth turning up into a half-smile. Liv's expression softened and she responded.
"Hey" Liv breathed, her stomach somersaulting at the sight of him, and in nervous anticipation of what was to come.
"Can I come in, or are you waiting for a password?" Rafa asked lightly, his words drawing Liv immediately out of her stupor. "If Noah came up with it, I'm gonna go with 'Cedric'" he stated lightly. Liv laughed in response and stepped aside.
"Come on in" she said warmly, as Rafa walked past her and headed into her apartment.
As Rafa walked into the living room the smell of tomato, cheese and vegetables greeted him in comforting waves, and his mouth watered. His eyes drifted towards the kitchen, and he noticed a glass of water with ice and lemon next to a bowl of potato chips. He remembered Liv telling him that lemons and lightly salted chips helped with her nausea.
"Are you feeling nauseous?" Rafa asked gently, the words escaping his mouth before he could stop them. Liv looked at him in surprise. "The chips and lemon water" he said quickly.
"Right" Liv breathed, an embarrassed smile playing on her lips. "Only a little, it's nothing" she said dismissively. "Scotch?" she asked.
"Sure, thank you" Rafa replied, as he removed his coat and jacket and placed them on the armchair, together with his briefcase. He then followed Liv towards the kitchen and watched as she poured him a glass of scotch. "I got you some chocolate, lemons and potato chips" he advised, placing the brown paper bag down on the island. Liv finished pouring his scotch and looked up at him, her expression one of surprise and gratitude. "Which is possibly one of the strangest combinations of foods I've bought from the store" he added lightly. Liv smiled.
"Thank you, Rafa" she said sincerely, as she picked up the bag and removed the contents, putting them away.
Rafa watched as Liv made her way around the kitchen, putting the lemons in the fridge, and the chips and chocolate in a cupboard. There was something about her walking barefoot across the kitchen an oversized white jumper and black leggings that he found incredibly attractive. He could not take his eyes off her. As she turned towards him the material of her jumper clung close to her body, defining the rounded swell of her belly, which was becoming increasingly prominent. He felt warmth pool deep in his belly, as excitement and nervous anticipation flooded him.
"I made roasted vegetable lasagne, with garlic bread" Liv informed him. "It should be just about ready" she advised, as she made her way towards the oven.
"It smells wonderful" Rafa remarked, watching as Liv removed the bubbling lasagne from the oven. "Is there anything I can do?" he offered.
"Take a seat and enjoy your scotch" Liv responded, as she placed the lasagne on the side, removed the garlic bread from the oven and headed towards the fridge.
Liv and Rafa spent the next fifteen minutes eating dinner at the kitchen island, talking about work, Noah and a variety of other subjects in an attempt to ease Liv's palpable anxiety. She was visibly calmer at the end of the meal, which Rafa was relieved to see.
After placing the dishes by the sink, Liv picked up her glass from the kitchen counter, before leading him into the living room. Rafa took a sip of scotch and followed her, joining her on the couch and taking up what was now his 'usual spot'.
"Thank you for coming over" Liv said gently. Rafa noticed a hesitancy in her voice, and embarrassment in her tone. "And thank you, again, for this weekend" she added warmly. "I really appreciated everything you did for me" she added sincerely. "I had a lovely time, and so did Noah" she continued. Rafa smiled softly and nodded.
"Me too" he replied. Liv relaxed visibly and she nodded, drawing her legs up onto the couch and turning her body to face him. His eyes drifted instinctively towards her belly, which she noticed immediately. She placed a hand over her belly and Rafa felt warmth spread across his chest.
"I'm not gonna be able to hide this for much longer" Liv said quietly. Her tone was one of attempted levity, but the worry in her eyes betray her. "Especially after eating, when I get huge" she added lightly.
"You don't have to hide anything, Liv" Rafa said gently, his voice warm and reassuring. "And you look beautiful" he added sincerely. Liv smiled softly and nodded, as she began stroking her belly subconsciously.
Ever since getting the test results back, the barriers Liv had placed between herself and her baby disappeared, and her guilt at having tried to ignore it overwhelmed her. It was a combination of her guilt and her wonder that had prompted her to touch her belly more frequently, to look at it, to pull the fabric of her shirts against it to see how it fell. The sight of her rounded belly, and the sensation of the baby moving (which was now quite frequent) caused the connection between her and her baby to deepen.
"Is it moving?" Rafa asked, speaking his thoughts out loud. Liv blinked herself out of her brief reverie and nodded.
"It is" she confirmed, stilling her hand upon her belly and splaying her fingers across it. "It feels like butterflies" she explained, watching as Rafa stared at her belly and nodded distractedly in response. She found herself feeling moved by the way he was looking at her belly; it was the same way he often looked at her. "I don't know if you'd be able to feel it yet, but would you like to-"
"Yes" Rafa replied keenly, looking up at her as he spoke. As he met her gaze he realised he had interrupted her. "Sorry, I-"
"It's fine" Liv assured him, edging closer to him on the couch, and stopping just as her knee pressed against the outside of his thigh. Liv took Rafa's left hand in hers and drew it towards her belly, pressing it against it, just in the spot where she felt butterflies fluttering inside her. She waited a few moments. "Do you feel that?" she asked.
Rafa splayed his fingers across her belly, pressing his palm against it and concentrating, but he felt nothing.
"No" Rafa said gently, offering her a reassuring smile.
"You will" Liv assured him, as she placed her hand over his. Rafa nodded in response as he began absent mindedly stroking her belly. "Have you told your mother?" she asked gently.
"No, not yet" Rafa responded. "I wanted to wait until after tonight" he explained. Liv nodded in understanding. "Have you told Noah?"
"No, not yet" Liv replied, smiling nervously as she spoke. "I'm planning on telling him later this week" she explained. Rafa nodded in agreement.
"I'm sure he'll be fine" Rafa reassured her. "He's a great kid, and he'll be a wonderful big brother."
"He will" Liv smiled. Rafa smiled in response. "How do you think your mother will take it?" she asked.
"She'll be excited to be an abuelita" Rafa replied. "But she'll have lots of questions" he added with a small sigh.
"That's understandable" Liv replied. Rafa nodded.
"I feel as though I'm about sixteen years old and about to tell my mother I got a classmate pregnant on prom night" he said lightly. Liv smiled.
"Well, at least you won't have to explain how the baby got there to a curious eight year old" Liv replied lightly.
"Oh, she will have some questions about that too, I'm sure" Rafa said lightly, earning a chuckle from Liv. He smiled at her with affection and then removed his hand from her belly, taking her hand in his and holding it gently. "But it's gonna be fine."
"I know" Liv said gently. "I don't know who I'm more worried about telling, Noah or the Chief of Detectives" she said lightly. Rafa smirked.
"I see your Chief of Detectives and raise you the DA" he stated, raising his eyebrows as he spoke.
"Maybe we can tell them over email?" Liv suggested.
"I think that's best" he replied quickly. Liv smiled and found herself relaxing in Rafa's company.
"In many ways, those are the easier parts" Liv said contemplatively. Rafa squeezed her hand gently.
"Hey" he said warmly, prompting her to look up and meet his gaze, "it's gonna be okay" he reassured her. "We have plenty of time, and we don't have to have everything figured out right away" he soothed. "We are both two intelligent, mature, financially stable adults who are having a baby together" he explained. "People in far less fortunate circumstances have babies everyday" he reminded her. "We are both capable of taking care of our baby. There is nothing that we cannot work out" he assured her.
Liv smiled softly at Rafa. He had a way of making even the most complicated and seemingly impossible situations seem solvable.
"Do you want this?" Liv asked directly, her voice sounding less confident than she had intended. Rafa's eyebrows knitted in confusion.
"Do I want this?" he repeated gently. "You mean the baby?" he asked. "Yes" he added quickly, edging closer to Liv and placing his free hand on her waist. "Yes, I want this baby. I do. Of course I do" he continued, his eyes not leaving hers. "Were you afraid that I wouldn't?" he asked, confusion and concern present in his voice.
"I don't know, I just..." Liv began, struggling to formulate her thoughts into words. Or, at this point, even formulate thoughts. "I know this was unexpected, we didn't plan this, and everything between us both is so complicated" she continued, the words flowing from her without her volition. "I don't want you to feel obligated or responsible-"
"Liv, Liv, hey, slow down" Rafa soothed, stroking her waist as he spoke, his eyes holding her gaze. "I know this was unexpected, and things between us have been complicated" he acknowledged. "But that does not mean I do not want this baby" he stated. "Our baby" he corrected. Liv felt warmth and relief flood her, and she nodded in agreement. "And I am absolutely responsible" he stated. "We both are" he added quickly. "Our relationship with each other and with our baby are two separate things" he explained tentatively. "Whilst there are things we need to decide sooner rather than later in relation to the baby, we do not need to rush anything concerning our relationship with each other" he explained, addressing what was clearly a major concern of Liv's. "We don't need to be married, or even in a romantic relationship with each other, in order to be good parents" he assured her. Whilst he wanted to discuss their relationship, he knew that Liv had lots of worries and concerns about the baby, and he wanted to address those first to reassure her. "This isn't the 1930s, Liv" he reminded her gently. "We don't have to get married and move to the suburbs, and you don't have to quit your job and spend the days cooking, cleaning and looking after our children" he assured her.
"I know that" Liv replied softly. Rafa offered her a reassuring smile. Whilst she agreed with what he was saying and knew he was right, she felt a pang of sadness at his references to them not being in a relationship, which she quickly tried to suppress.
"Whatever happens between us" Rafa began, prompting Liv to look up at him once more. "I want you to know I am absolutely committed to you and our baby" he assured her. Liv's expression softened and she nodded.
"I know" Liv smiled. "Of all the things I was worried about, that was never one of them" she assured him. Rafa nodded slowly.
"So let's talk about the things that you are worried about" he said gently. Liv swallowed thickly and nodded.
"I don't want to give up my job" Liv stated, watching him curiously as she spoke.
"You don't have to" Rafa replied simply. "I would never want or expect you to give up anything you care about, that means something to you" he assured her. "If you want to take six months, a year, two years off, that's fine, that's okay" he continued. "I will support whatever decision you make concerning your job" he stated. "I will pay for a nanny when you're ready to-"
"No, Rafa, you don't have to-"
"Yes, I do" Rafa responded, his voice patient and his tone assured.
"I don't want your money" Liv said, feeling embarrassed. "This was never about money" she added quickly.
"I know that money is an uncomfortable subject" Rafa said gently. "But it is something we are going to have to talk about at some point" he advised. "Not necessarily today" he added quickly. "Liv, you and I are both responsible for this baby, in every way, including financially" he reminded her. "It is only right that I contribute towards childcare, baby supplies, and all other expenses" he stated. He was also going to suggest he contribute towards her rent/purchase of a larger apartment in due course, but given her evident discomfort he decided not to raise that at this time.
Liv stared at Rafa for a moment before nodding reluctantly in response. She knew what he was saying was right, and fair, but she still felt uncomfortable.
"Okay" Liv said quietly. "I'm sorry, it's just with Noah I was the sole provider as I was his only parent" she explained. "So this is rather unfamiliar territory" she explained. Rafa nodded.
"I understand" he said kindly, offering her a reassuring smile.
"How would you feel about Lucy being the baby's nanny?" Liv asked. Rafa nodded in response immediately. He had met Lucy several times and had seen her taking care of Noah; she was capable, patient and wonderful with children. And, most importantly, Liv trusted her.
"Of course" he replied. Liv nodded.
"How about we each pay half of her fees for taking care of the baby?" Liv suggested. Rafa considered it for a moment before nodding in agreement.
"Fine" he agreed amiably, offering Liv a smile. Liv seemed to relax considerably with each matter they discussed.
"You make everything seem so easy" Liv said gently.
"Not easy, necessarily" Rafa replied. "But solvable" he added simply. "Liv, I promise you, there is absolutely nothing that we cannot figure out" he assured her. Liv smiled softly and nodded. "Especially when we reach such a fair and reasonable plea bargain" he added, reaching for his scotch and taking a sip. Liv laughed, and watched him fondly as he sipped his scotch. Seeing him sitting next to her, on her couch, in her apartment, felt like the most natural thing in the world. And the more she thought about it, the more she realised she did not want it to end.
"I know things between us have complicated for some time now" Liv began, the words escaping her lips, and flowing easily as soon as she started. Rafa put his glass back down on the table and turned towards her, watching her attentively as she spoke. "And I appreciate that my pregnancy adds a whole new set of complications" she acknowledged. "But I want you to know that amidst all of complications and uncertainty, there is one thing that is not complicated and now, I realise, never has been" she continued, feeling her stomach tighten in anticipation of the words which would follow. "And that's the way I feel about you. About us" she added, watching as Rafa's eyes widened ever so slightly, indicating his surprise. "You are the kindest, bravest, most selfless man I have ever met" she began. "Your decency and humanity are incredible. They make you the man I admire, and trust, and believe in with every fibre of my being" she continued, holding his gaze as she spoke. "And that's why I fell in love with you" she said simply, watching Rafa's eyes widen and his lips slightly part, as the words came easily from her. "I trust you, completely, especially in times where I'm not sure I can even trust myself" she explained. "You make me feel safe, and valued, and loved" she said simply. "Being with you feels so effortless and so easy and so right" she explained. "This weekend was the best weekend I have ever had" she said sincerely. "I loved every second of it, and I didn't want it to end" she continued, "I felt like we were a family. And this weekend, I got a glimpse of the future we could have together" she added, feeling slightly choked as she spoke. "And it was beautiful" she smiled, swallowing hard as she tried to blink back the tears which threatened to fall. She felt Rafa's hand capture hers and she squeezed it gently. "Nothing about this weekend, or you, or being with you, is complicated" she stated with conviction. "It's everything I've ever wanted" she added.
Rafa, who had remained still in a wordless silence as he listened to Liv speak, edged closer to her, placing a comforting hand on her upper arm as she looked at him with uncertainty, her vulnerability reflected in her eyes.
"Liv, I love you too" he said simply. "I have always loved you" he explained, offering her a tight smile. "Always" he repeated. "And unconditionally" he added.
Liv felt relief and excitement flood her, as she smiled in response and nodded. She held Rafa's gaze for a few moments, her heart beating faster and her breathing deepening. Her hand reached out to him of its own volition, cupping his right cheek and stroking it tenderly with her thumb, before she leaned in close, closing her eyes as she pressed a tender kiss to his lips.