A Marriage that Started a Legend

by IJustShowedUp

Follows canon but with my own arranged marriage spin on it. What happens when Hunith makes a mistake and is forced on the run with her infant son? What happens when Camelot knights find her twenty years later? What happens when Arthur learns he's betrothed to a peasant boy? Will Merlin be able to stand among royalty? Will these two different boys survive each other? Review!

177. Chapter 179

This chapter is dedicated to TaiOtaku96, who wanted to see Arthur being a complete nervous wreck talking to Merlin after the dream he had. Who wanted to see Arthur stuck thinking about his dream and imagining it while trying his hardest to hold a half decent conversation with Merlin. So I hope they like how I went about it ;p

X

It had take a fair few hours before Merlin Pendragon finally stood in the middle of his room, dressed with every intention of killing those that saw him. Despite Merlin's intrigue in the new style of clothes, it had taken longer than he'd been anticipating to get into them. Without Gwen there to assist him, he would have never been able to get into it. There were buttons down the side that he hadn't even seen, which would've left his entire ribcage exposed if he had missed seeing them before he left. There were ties here and there that Gwen had worked her fingers through to make sure they wouldn't come loose. Even a belt that Gwen had made sure was extra tight on his slim waist, or else there would've been a very good chance he would've lost his pants at some point during the night. It was definitely something Merlin didn't want to experience…his pants dropping around his ankles and baring himself to the entire room when he was talking to somebody.

Imagine the horror he would feel if it was Uther…

Or Arthur…

It was already horribly embarrassing enough considering Morgana had been in the room and watched him as he dressed, giving Gwen instructions on how he was supposed to look. How he was supposed to stand in the thick, heavy duty clothes. How the outfit was on just the right sight of dramatic…it had been the exact mood Merlin felt like going for. It was bold and daring, and yet…tonight's outfit was more modest than anything the royal dressmaker had forced him to wear in the past. It didn't show off skin Merlin was uncomfortable with wanting to show, and it didn't hide anything that he wanted hidden…Merlin turned into a slow circle to let the girl's check out the final product. Almost enjoying the dramatic flair the long cape gave, something that would really make him stand out in the crowd. Merlin wasn't in a mood to stay hidden…he'd been hiding for too long now.

And tonight…

Tonight he wanted to be seen.

To look as if he had every right to stand next to Camelot's newest knight…

But still, Merlin's stomach clenched with nerves as he clutched the edges of the long, thick sleeves, as something to hold onto. Festivities and parties had never really ended well for him…the last party he had attended had ended with him being poisoned and landing him on death's door. What if something similar happened tonight? What if Merlin was going through all this work just to make himself look good for once, only for it to be for nothing? What if Merlin, who is determined to have more fun tonight than he had any other night since he has been in Camelot, ended up facing death's door once again? Some people may call Merlin paranoid, but…past experiences had already taught him to expect for the worse to happen.

But Merlin didn't want to go out there tonight, looking for trouble.

He wanted to stand at one of the food tables with his friends, stuff himself silly with foods as if he had never once tried to starve himself, and speak with them about the most mundane topics. He wanted to throw his head back and laugh as if there was no tomorrow. Wanted to go out on the dance floor and pretend as if the whole world wasn't there watching, waiting for him to make a scene or drag attention onto himself. He wanted to…to…to cut loose and act as if he was bloody well nineteen and on his own for the first time. Without having a single thing that tied him down to the ground as if he was nothing more than a whipping boy.

He just wasn't sure if he could do it.

When was the last time Merlin had done anything…fun? Something that's just for him, something that he knew he needed to do or he was going to go crazy from the hardship's of life. He probably hadn't done anything like that since he was back in Ealdor. When it had just been him, his mom, and his best friend in the whole world…Will…to run wild with. Running through the trees as if they'd be able to escape Ealdor had been their fun, the wind whipping through their hair and dodging trees as if nothing could stop them from going wherever they wanted too…until supper ultimately called them back home. Tonight would not be anything like that, but Merlin was still determined for it to be the best night of his bloody life.

"Dang, Merlin. I was thinking that I wanted you to look killer tonight, but I think we might've underestimated just how good you look in those colors. That pale skin of yours and dark hair, it complements those colors perfectly. And you've got those blue eyes that really stand out…I honestly think that Gwen and I may have outdone ourselves this time. Now, do another turn for me so I can see if it is missing something." Morgana commanded him, because it clearly wasn't her asking, and Merlin did as he was told. Spinning slowly in the thick black boots that had came with the outfit-the perfect size, of course-and feeling as if he's a prized meat on a stick waiting for her acceptance of his attire. Gwen silently stood on the side, grinning a little as she tucked away the outfit that had gone unused in his trunk, with the other outfits that he figured would never see the light of day for as long as he lived. "Ah! And just as I suspected. Your bottom really fills out those pants! You're going to have the eye of every man out there just trying to eat you up, just you wait!"

Merlin whipped his head back around startled, eyes etching wide in horror as his lips dropped open, his hands going around behind him to protectively cup around his bottom…what in the world? Why would Morgana say something like that…it was weird. Maybe the pants were a little snug, but…what did that have to do with guys…eyeing him up? It wasn't as if Merlin was going to this party to find somebody willing to date him! In fact…meeting guys weren't even going in his agenda tonight, or any other night. Maybe because of all the horrid luck he had in that department, but Merlin didn't want to think about such things on a night like this. Besides, for everybody's safety…Merlin wasn't talking to anyone that might invoke Arthur's temper where he could see it. He didn't want to see another fight! Not tonight…not on his night of fun and freedom.

"Oh, don't give me that look. I'm sure that Arthur's done a number on you, but you need to know how beautiful you are. Both inside and out. And I'm going to make it my life's mission to make sure that I do, just you wait Merlin. The next time a party comes around, you won't even question whether or not you've got something special going on." Morgana stated plainly, waving a hand at him as if his reaction to her…confusing statement, was nothing he should think twice about. And Merlin's jaw closed back with a clink of teeth, slowly releasing his bottom from his hands…how exactly did Morgana do that? Call Merlin beautiful while also seeing how nerve racking this all was for him…Merlin didn't wear the clothes like the ones he wore now! He wanted to feel beautiful like she claimed he was, but, as she had said…Arthur had done a real number on him. Stuff that he was still trying to put behind him…he did for the most part. But then there's times like this where Merlin found he was questioning everything, and it always left him wondering if he was making a huge mistake. Maybe he should've worn the other outfit, it probably wouldn't get as many stares. Maybe he just should not go at all…he wouldn't want to ruin Lancelot's big night just because he was going through his issues trying to rear their ugly heads again. Maybe… "Gwen, would you mind terribly if I had a moment with Merlin? Maybe you can go down and speak with that man of yours for a few moments. We shouldn't be all that long, I'm sure…"

Merlin silently raised an eyebrow in question, and shared a look with Gwen…she didn't seem as put out about this sudden ask as Merlin did. Even when Morgana wasn't looking at her, it appeared as if Gwen already knew what was going to happen, and she cast Merlin an encouraging smile as she shut the lid down on his trunk and strode from the room without question. Closing the door softly behind her on her way out, leaving Merlin and Morgana alone…Merlin turned back to Morgana a touch more weary than before. People wanting private conversations never did seem to end well for him, they were usually emotional and draining and…Merlin just wanted to throw himself into a party. Not into something that might make him want to cry, but Morgana was clearly not going to take 'no' for an answer, as she gestured towards his bed. Merlin gingerly sat down on the very edge of it, rearranging the thick cape that was meant more for looks than for warmth, so he wasn't sitting on top of it. And Morgana sat down beside him, looking so out of place on his little cot in her regal gown, picking up the brush that Gwen had left sitting out.

"Hmmm, you know, you don't have to tell me anything that you don't want to, Merlin. You don't have to tell me how…nerve wracking, I expect this must really be for you, after the last time you went to a party-" Merlin nearly flinched with the pressure of the brush appearing on his head, Morgana politely pretending she hadn't noticed as she started tugging his cowlicks into place, but…Merlin could feel the poison sliding down his throat. Merlin could feel the burning that wouldn't go away no matter how hard he clawed at his own throat…the pain of remembering that night was almost as painful as having lived it. "And you also don't have to tell me about the expectations that are heaped onto you…i don't think you've said a single word since Gwen started preparing you, and that will be how I know that you are starting to feel the strain. It's the same strain that I feel every time I'm expected to put on a good face. And you know what I need to tell myself to get through one more pointless party thrown by Uther…?"

Merlin bit down on his lip, relaxing against her as she ran the brush throughout his hair a few more times to release the wayward strands…he hadn't realized it was so quiet until Morgana had pointed out his lack of speaking, the one sure sign that something was wrong with him. Merlin had simply spent all this time listening to Morgana and Gwen talking over him, lifting his arms when she had asked him too, bending down so she could flip the cape over his shoulders so it would stream out properly, sitting down so Gwen could tie up his boots with the uniform style the nobles did, so it wouldn't end up in a messy knot like the consort would've done. Merlin had been too busy psyching himself out about tonight's events to protest a great deal about being dressed like this, stressing himself out until he wanted to crawl back inside his bed and sleep until the whole event was over. Going through the motions with a lost, little lamb look in his eye…it was no surprise Morgana had noted the off way about him. Gwen had probably noticed too, which was why she had left all too quickly…it was Morgana's turn to be there for him. But even now, he didn't speak. He silently tilting his head to the side in question, more focused and aware than he had probably been since he started stripping to his undergarments.

"Just take it one step at a time."

All of the air inside of Merlin seemed to whoosh out of his lungs in one large breath…take it one step at a time, he repeated inside his head as if it was his new mantra. Just one step at a time…it was something so simple, something that Merlin had been basically doing this entire time. And yet, hearing it being spoken out loud made it more of a…solid mindset in his head. He just needed to keep walking, and take things as they came at him. He wasn't going to falter and he wasn't going to be stupid enough to drink a deadly concoction…he had reasons to live now. Things he wanted to see through, things that he'd allowed himself to forget about when he'd been in his darkest days. He had people that cared about him, and him about them. All he needed to was just…keep taking a step at a time. And hope everything would fall into place…a hopeful mindset is leagues better than anything else. He just had to remember to stay away from Arthur, and he'd be…he'd be golden.

"I can do that."

Merlin was already doing better if he was able to speak in a full sentence, as small as that sentence had actually been. But that sentence was only going to be the start of…the greatest night of his life. He had his boots on, and he had his fancy cape, and his hair wasn't entirely a mess this time. He just needed to bring his attitude and his friends and, well…then he could do anything. Besides he HAD to be there. Merlin hadn't made it this far with Lancelot, hadn't gotten him his fake seal and his armor and went through hell with Arthur just to get a chance at knighthood, only to not show up during the final bits. Merlin started this whole thing, the least he could do was watch Lancelot and his new life as a Camelot Knight, begin. He was pretty sure this was going to be the type of story that would be shared for generations to come, and bloody hell, he didn't have any excuse to miss it. Not this one…

"Good, good. I don't think this party would be half as interesting if you'd gone and decided to skip it. I think that both Gwen and I would've left early if it had came down to that. Heaven knows neither of us could have any fun when both of us knew you were sequestered away up here like some dusty old thing that never came out to play." Morgana said with a light hearted tone, reaching out to give Merlin's shoulder a firm squeeze…Merlin felt his heart starting to melt a little. Now see, that was why Morgana was his friend. So worried about others, that she would deny herself what was supposed to be a fun evening, just to be sitting up here with him. But that was only another reason as to why Merlin will do this…he didn't want to ruin this evening for them as well. He could live free and happy…he knew he could… "But um, Merlin…I…there's just one thing that I wanted to…to ask you about before we go downstairs and put this whole thing behind us. It's kind of a sensitive topic, and I'm not sure how you'll react, but I don't think I can wait another minute. I've been holding it back for days, I kinda figured the space without an interrogation would be good for you…"

Morgana's hand dropped away from his shoulder, and Merlin tilted his head to the side with his confusion, his brows starting to furrow together…she wanted to ask him something? But wasn't coming right out to say it? Merlin was pretty sure Morgana had never shied away from a problem in her entire life, she was the first one to speak up and say whatever was on her mind. Even when half of the population would look down on her for simply being a woman speaking out of turn. But…Merlin wasn't one of those nobles that would demand she learn a bit of respect, simply for asking a personal question. They were FRIENDS! And Merlin liked to think they were at the stage in their friendship where they could ask questions of each other and not worry about whether or not the other one would get mad at them. If somebody couldn't ask a friend something, then he wanted to know what the point even was to HAVE friends. But it was clear that Morgana was being serious with him, the way her fingers were starting to tap along her side, looking away from him as she bit her lip…Merlin had never seen Morgana act like that. And it worried him greatly, his mind wondering to all the worse possibilities that it could be…

"You know that you don't even have to ask if you can ask me something, you know that you can ask me anything. And I'll tell you the answer, of course, as truthfully as I can. I promise I won't freak out and scream at you or anything of the sort." Merlin said, making a poor joke as he referenced to all the times that he had yelled at Arthur for one reason or the other. But Morgana didn't crack a smile at all, she only seemed to look more anxious, and Merlin's own smile was starting to fade as he realized 'exactly' how serious she was right now. And his stomach dropped straight to his feet, sure that whatever question was on her mind, had probably been even worse than what he had been thinking. "…What is it, Morgana?"

Morgana didn't answer him for a long stretch of minute, and Merlin's mind spiraled down into the depths of forbidden topics she could be lingering on…oh, god. What if it was his magic, Merlin's heart skipped a beat. What if this was it…what if Morgana had found out he had magic. Maybe she had seen him doing something, or had overheard something, or maybe she had even found his secret stash…Merlin's eyes darted back towards his bed. To where that one loose floorboard was lying perfectly in its hole, shielding the magic book Gaius had given him beneath his floors. No…Morgana couldn't have found it. She had never been in his room alone before. And he would've noticed if she'd started poking around down there for some reason. So maybe she really had managed to see something, but…when was the last time Merlin had used his magic? Had he used it this morning, to fetch a book across the room but had been far too lazy to get up and get himself…had he even done that? Or had he actually got up and gone to the shelf himself…he couldn't remember. And Merlin wanted to curse himself for being so…negligent. How many times has Gaius drilled in his head that he needed to be careful, echoing the lessons that Merlin's very own mother had tried teaching him about how to be safe in the world when he had abilities that made him…not so safe to be around.

"I came to Gaius a few days ago, because I was looking for you! I wanted to be near you again…just to watch over you. And then Gaius said that you'd already left and then I spent like half the day trying to find you because I was scared if you were by yourself for too long, then something would happen to you! But it didn't, nothing happened. And now you've thrown yourself into this thing with Lancelot, and I'm scared again about what will happen once he's not around all the time! He's probably going to be really busy once he starts getting different assignment and duties and-" Morgana started speaking in a rush, all her words starting to blend together until Merlin had to pick them a part just to figure out what exactly she was going on about. But by the time he did, Morgana already moved onto another string of sentences that needed to be picked over, "I just need to know if you're using Lancelot as some sort of…clutch, so that you are not having to think about your real problems anymore. I mean…Merlin…I know you were trying to hurt yourself! That night, when you drunk the poison. And I know that it couldn't have been the first time you thought of doing something like that. And I…I don't want you to try it again. I don't want to come here one day only for Gaius to tell me that something happened-"

Morgana cut herself off as a choked out sound escaped her, and Merlin's face went a sheen paler than he usually was…oh. Ooooh. It all suddenly made much more sense to him…Morgana had practically been attached at his hip during all these weeks. Ever since he started his first hints of recovery. In fact, these last few days had probably been the longest time he'd gone without seeing her. To be honest, Lancelot HAD kept him pretty busy, that he had hardly noticed it at first. But Morgana HAD been the reason Gaius had that talk with him after he'd gotten back that first night with Lancelot in tow…Morgana had convinced that uncle of his that he still might not be better. Merlin had just barely managed to convince his uncle that he was, well…not okay. But keeping himself busy, and working on himself so he wouldn't fall that deep again. But the other lady had not been there during this talk…had Morgana spent the last few days thinking he was on some kind of…suicide watch? Had she spent the last few days just 'waiting' for a letter from Gaius that said he'd done everything he could, but he had managed to succeed in his next attempt? All at once, Merlin felt terrible…it was a huge burden, his past sins weighed on him. But he had never meant for his friends to be weighed down the same way…

"Morgana, please. You don't need to think about this. I swear to you, I know I made a mistake, and I know that you witnessed it. I wish that I could just take it back so that you wouldn't have to see it. But I can't, and you have absolutely no idea how much it kills me. Metaphorically, I mean, not literally. But…" Merlin cut himself off when he met Morgana's dark green eyes…fuck. She looked as if she was about to start crying, as if she could remember that night as easily as Merlin had. As if she could close her eyes and be right there in front of far too many people, and being in so much pain that he didn't care who got to see the final moment's of his life…fuck. Merlin hadn't just been hurting himself, had he been? He'd been hurting everybody else…hurting the people that cared about him so much…Merlin's heart twisted painfully in his chest, and he quickly put his arms around Morgana, dragging her into his chest so that she could place her head right beneath his chin. Listening to the sounds of his heartbeat with her own ears, listening to the sound of his life beating like a drum through his chest and into her eardrums. "…I'm going to tell you exactly what I told Uncle Gaius when he asked me about all this…I understand what I did was wrong. I understand that hurting myself…wasn't the solution to my problems. I know it wasn't, because the last thought I had before I blacked out, was…I didn't want to die. I didn't want to die because there is just…so much stuff that I haven't done yet. So many things that I want to do, and an entire world I might get to see…if I just keep going. So…don't worry about this. I won't be going anywhere anytime soon. You're practically stuck with me now."

Morgana let out this wet sounding sob, and Merlin held onto her a bit tighter than before, squeezing his own eyes shut to hide how messed up everything had been for him. His own eyes wet with the tears he promised he wouldn't be shedding, no matter how much he wanted to cry with Morgana. It had been his own stupidity that led them here, he could see that now. If he had died the day he had meant too…he wouldn't be here now. He would have never ended up in the forest the day those knights tried to kill him, would've never met Lancelot, who would've never came up with a plan to lie about his heritage without him being there to suggest it. All the books Gaius had allowed him to read over this past month would've been knowledge he had never learned. All those times he had sat with Gwen at the table and chatted as if he wasn't recovering from the deadly toxins that had tried snuffing out his life, would've been memories that he never had. He never would've realized Arthur was such a freak…and Merlin would've left Morgana in a worse state than this. Merlin had known they were friends, even anticipated she might be sad about his passing, but he hadn't accounted on it being this bad. Hadn't been counting on being here to see just how bad his friends would take it…Merlin wouldn't have just been taken from them because of some fluke and accident. He would've been taken by his very own hands…how would he have felt if it had been one of his friends who had done something like this? Pretty fucking emotional, that's how he would've felt during the whole bloody ordeal…

"Do you promise me, Merlin? Do you truly and honestly promise me that all of this…it isn't something to worry about anymore? That I don't have to feel as if my heart is in my throat anymore if you take a second too long to come down the stairs. Or feel as if I'm going to walk through those doors and feel as if you are nothing more than a ghost, here but not really here at all?" Morgana asked him, tone soft and quiet as she finally lifted her head off his shoulder, but still not looking at him as her dark ponytail shielded most of her face from his view. "Because I don't think that I can go through something like that again…you just said you wished that you could go back in time and make sure I didn't see any of it? But…you still would've done it with or without me being there…Merlin. It CAN'T happen again. I want to KNOW if you are ever in so much pain that you want to…want to hurt yourself. I knew that you were depressed, but, I hadn't thought…please. If you ever feel the need to do that…I need you to come right to me. Because I would rather know that my best friend is hurt, then ending up blindsided by something that I should seen coming."

No, Merlin thought quietly…Morgana shouldn't have seen it coming at all. With those days leading up to the banquet, when Merlin had decided his final days were upon him…he had done everything he could to seem more normal. Merlin had talked more, spent more time with his friends, had spoken out against that bloody Prince of his, because he had known there was nothing left that any of them could do to him. He had given up, but to everybody else, it had looked as if he was starting to get better. Maybe that was why they wanted to keep such a close eye on him…just because Merlin said he was getting better didn't mean he wouldn't have some kind of relapse if his depression struck him hard out of nowhere again. But…things were going to be different this time. Because now…now he knew he wasn't alone. Now, he knew he had people who were counting on him to be there, just as he counted on them. He wouldn't forget that again…

"I promise."

The conviction in Merlin's voice, the strong surety that said everything would be okay now, seemed to make Morgana relax. Her shoulders slumping forward as if she had thought Merlin was going to say something else…admit that he's still running on fumes and was about to crash any second now, into something even worse than the last time. Merlin clenched his jaw, squaring his shoulders a little bit more firmly…come hell or high water, Merlin wasn't going to allow his friends to worry anymore. Not Morgana, not Gwen, not his uncle, and not anybody else he formed a bond with like Lancelot. There was far too much in this world to begin with, he wasn't going to add to the stress. He would just keep making sure he kept to his recovery, stuck to his routines as best as he could, eat when he was supposed to and continue on as he was supposed to. If he did, maybe one of these days…the still fresh pain would be nothing but a distant memory.

X

It was a few minutes later before Merlin Pendragon started walking downstairs, his black cape fanning out behind him and giving the illusion that he wasn't as human as he portrayed himself to be. Morgana trailing behind him with a hand holding the edge of her skirt up so she wouldn't step on the delicate hem, they had stayed upstairs just long enough for Morgana to clean her face up, so that it wouldn't look like the black lining her eyes hadn't started running. Once the consort reached the bottom of the stairs, he turned around to give Morgana a hand so that she wouldn't trip over the knot he knew to be in the wood on the last step. He wouldn't want her to break an ankle wearing those heels, not so soon after they've already had a talk that had been ripe with fragility. Once he deemed the lady could walk by herself now, Merlin turned back around, and it was only then that Merlin noticed the occupants of the room staring at him…

Gwen was standing by one of the tables, neatly tidying up a few of the books that had been scattered there, but her hands had paused at the sight made by Merlin and Morgana both, standing there arm to arm with each other. Lancelot it seemed…wasn't there, Merlin noted with a frown as he glanced around trying to see if he was hiding out in a corner somewhere. Merlin would find out only a bit later, that Lancelot had already left, needing to arrive a bit earlier than any of them so he could be instructed on how things were going to go during this ceremony. And Gaius, well…Merlin nearly panicked when he saw a wet shine in his uncle's eye…what was it about Merlin that seemed to make everybody want to start crying when he came near them? Merlin was going to have some real problems in life if people cried everytime he entered a room…he couldn't deal with that! Unless, maybe it wasn't him that made Gaius upset! There had to be some other reason, because he hadn't done anything to make him upset …Merlin strode forward anxiously.

"Uncle Gaius? What's wrong? Has something happened? Is Lancelot alright, or did you get news that one of your patients has died? You NEVER cry. Please…it can't be today of all days that you do. Just tell me what's wrong so that I could help you." Merlin immediately said, anxiously twining his hands together in this nervous gesture. Tonight was already going to be emotional enough, he's very much sure he's going to start bawling when Lancelot finally gets a real official title that he'd earned the right to wear. But it would be happy tears…how could Merlin have fun tonight if his uncle was upset! Something like this was going to end up stuck in his mind and he was going to spend the entire night worrying himself sick about it. "I don't want you to be upset on Lancelot's big night. But maybe if we act quickly, we can fix whatever it is and be on our way? Yeah. Hit me with it, alright. Maybe it's not as bad….its not as bad as you think it is, right uncle…?"

Gwen suddenly giggled from her spot behind them, lighthearted and airy, and clearly completely unconcerned about Gaius spilling emotions. Merlin shot her a confused look, but Gwen only shook her head as if she was amused…there's nothing amusing about this situation! Even Morgana was giving a slight smile, as if she had already caught on before Merlin had. But Merlin only frowned…he didn't see anything funny about what was going on. Something had gone and upset his uncle! Not just upset him, but had brought him to the brink of tears…anybody who knew his uncle, knew that Gaius wasn't an emotional man. The guy could turn off his emotions in a heartbeat, something that was needed to be a physician, in order to get the job done.

"Oh, don't worry your head one little bit about this old man, Merlin. There's not a single thing to worry about, not tonight at least. I supposed you simply made me startled, it's so rare that we get to see you all dressed up." Gaius said, as if Merlin's OUTFIT was the reason he was so emotional. But that was just silly, he thought as he ran his hands subconsciously down his tunic, tugging down the bottom as if it had been about to come up and show strips of his pale belly…it hadn't been. Unless…another thought struck Merlin. Unless his uncle had also been thinking about the past as Merlin had been upstairs, and was very much aware that, if things had gone differently, Merlin wouldn't be here to wow them all with how dressed up he could get. "Here, Merlin. I want you to wait for just a single second, alright? I think there's one thing missing from your outfit that would benefit you having."

Merlin blinked in surprise as his uncle walked away, starting to open drawers and digging through them to find whatever he was talking about…he shared an equally confused look with Gwen and Morgana. Gaius wasn't exactly the most fashion forward person. Despite having plenty of money of his own, it seemed he continued to favor old robes that were perfect for mixing remedies in, so he didn't have to worry about staining. Much like Merlin preferred wearing the few clothes that he had been raised wearing. But it didn't take long for Uncle Gaius to find what he had been looking for, returning with a small box in hand. A very small and fancy, ornate looking box. A very familiar small and fancy ornate box that Merlin had only seen once a few days ago…his eyes went wide when it was opened before him, showing him exactly what he had been expecting to see. It still had a question forming on his lips…

"Is that…"

Merlin found himself staring down at the very crest his uncle had shown to him all those days ago…the one that had once been known as belonging to Gaius' noble family. It was still as beautiful as ever, despite being hidden away inside the ornate box, where it could've remained for years, doing nothing more than collecting dust if Gaius hadn't thought of it now. The metal glittered beneath the torchlight, the bird inside still had it's wings spread wide open as if it was seconds away from flying off its metal frame and embracing the freedom that belonged to it: Merlin almost wanted to touch it, to run his fingers across all of the warm metal, touch the bird itself and see if he could also get his own taste of freedom…

"The Noble seal for the Whytt family, for our family…yes, it is. The original seal is one that had been handed down from generation to generation, was always given to the firstborn son once he was old enough that he could no longer be deemed a child." Gaius spoke, and Merlin's eyes wavered…why was the older man telling him this now…why was he giving this to him now? Merlin supposed it might be because…he really wasn't a child anymore. Merlin has already been through more life than most people would have to deal with, he was already a married man with an entirely different-technically-family than the one that he had been born with. He WASN'T a child. But…Merlin also didn't feel as if he's a man either. "Now, the original one was stolen before I was old enough to wear it myself. But now, now we have this one. And It would be a great honor, if you decided to wear this tonight, and show those people exactly where you came from, long before you became their consort."

Merlin felt his breath escaping him…he had known that this was coming, but it was so different hearing it out loud. Merlin almost didn't feel worthy of Gaius entrusting such a beautiful family heirloom into his hands. But…this heirloom wasn't just some useless trinket that Arthur was trying to toss his way just to make Merlin more pliable to whatever plans he had going on. This heirloom he had now…it was his. It belonged to him by birthright. With Gaius having no son or even a daughter that could someday provide a son of her own, then obviously the item would eventually pass down to Merlin's hands…his nephew. Or if one worded it differently…the first born son of the family. Merlin couldn't had tried denying this gift even if he wanted to. Having something from his own family, a heritage that said he was part of something…it was important. And who knows, some people might claim he shouldn't get it because he was 'illegitimate', with him being both a fatherless bastard and the son of a bastard daughter whose noble father had never bothered to officially claim her, but…that didn't matter. All that mattered was Gaius WANTING him to have this link to their family, was wanting Merlin to become linked to his family in more ways than just blood.

"I do have to warn you though, Merlin, before you agree to wear this…most of the people there probably won't recognize the crest for what it is. There are many people who have probably never seen my crest, let alone know what my families looked like. Perhaps a few older people, ones I grew up with, may just give it a second look. But I highly doubt even they will realize who the crest is belonging to." Gaius warned him, before Merlin had the chance to say 'yes, he wanted that crest, to be entrusted with the family heirloom, more than Merlin wanted anything else in the entire world. "But King Uther and Prince Arthur is definitely going to recognize it. Which means you won't be walking in there as a Pendragon tonight. Your last name or not, while you wear this crest, you will be representing the family of your blood. And I know that whatever happens to us all tonight, you'll make the Whytt family proud."

Merlin's throat closed up on him…that was really all he wanted. To make those he cared about proud of him. To not look back and see them bowing their heads down in shame because he had done something stupid and embarrassing and it was now reflecting back on them. But Merlin didn't have to think about what his decision was…he wanted that heirloom. The heirloom of his bloodline, the one that had given Gaius to him as an uncle…why on earth would he want to go to yet another party as a Pendragon. When he could feel as if he was a Whytt…Merlin had a feeling that the burden that came with being a Whytt, would end up being significantly less than the burden that came with being a Pendragon. Even if it was all just in his head…even if he was still a Pendragon…why could he also not be a Whytt?

Even if it only lasted for just this one night…

"I'd be honored if you would allow me to wear it tonight, Uncle."

It was probably the most respectful tone that Merlin had ever used when he spoke to his uncle, but the respect was well earned. Gaius had probably done more for him than anybody else in this entire kingdom had, and Merlin would do anything he had to if it meant keeping that proud glint brimming inside the other man's eyes. And Merlin watched as his uncle carefully removed the crest from its ornate box, setting the now useless thing onto one of the long nearby tables. And then Gaius was clipping it right beneath his neck, placing it directly on where his cloak was tied together, where it wouldn't be so easily hidden. The crest fell heavily against his chest, more heavily than Merlin would've thought a tiny thing could weigh. And yet…it made Merlin hold his head up just a little bit higher than before. A more confident step to him that was severely lacking from him when stuck as a Pendragon…

"Perfect."

And maybe it was just the way Gaius was looking at him, or maybe it was the way Gwen was subtly rubbing at her eyes, or the way Morgana was nudging at his arm so they could get going, but Merlin…he didn't feel so much like a child anymore. Usually when he wore these rich people clothes, Merlin felt as if he's nothing more than a child, just playing dress up in somebody else's closet. But that wasn't the case this time. This time…he was bloody well Merlin Pendragon, the heir of the Whytt family. A birthright that nobody, not even a Pendragon, could take from him.

X

Arthur Pendragon was doing something that he felt he did quite often…no. The prince KNEW that he did this too often. It was a constant point of frustration to the prince, one that wasted his valuable time and made him want to throw both hands into the air and be done with everything. And yet, Arthur Pendragon had never wondered too far away from this one spot, no matter how many endless hours he would be forced to wait. It had became almost expected by this point in Arthur's life, to pace back and forth in front of the grand doors that shielded the activities of the evening from his view, waiting for Merlin to arrive and wow him with whatever he had done to himself for the evening.

It was impossible to pretend Merlin didn't wow him every time he would show his face to the prince. And even now, Arthur found himself rubbing his sweaty hands down his thighs, trying to pretend he wasn't mere seconds away from breaking out in the stuff…he was pretty sure he had sweat stains trying to form beneath his arms. And he only prayed that the thickness of his clothes would be enough to hide them when Merlin arrived…Arthur wasn't dressed up nearly as much as he would usually be during celebrations. Considering tonight was a night where they were honoring and welcoming another young hopeful into the fold of knighthood, it was tradition for knights to wear their knightly garments as their own recognition and loyalties. Which was why Arthur only wore the red turncoat, the pendragon crest blazoned across the front of the fabric, his dark brown boots, his dark brown pants, and his chainmail slung over the top of his shoulders. Arthur was in a fit state, for a Knight of Camelot, but…

Would Merlin like it?

Arthur cursed himself for that stupid notion, wondering why it even mattered to him whether or not Merlin appreciated what he was wearing. Such a stupid thing for him to worry about, though considering how long it was taking for the consort just to arrive, maybe Arthur didn't want to be found…lackluster, when compared to him. Which was also a ridiculous notion, Arthur was a prince, and he could have worn the most ripped up and mud covered peasant clothing that he could get his hands on, and still come out smelling like roses. But the blond prince was definitely not smelling like a rose now, he thought as he subtly tried to sniff his underarm without catching the attention of any stragglers hanging around in the hallway. The stench of sweat met his nose and Arthur swallowed back another violent curse…he hoped Merlin wouldn't notice. He hoped that Merlin would show up at all. He hoped that Merlin would never show up…fuck it all. Arthur didn't know what he wanted, and that only made him even more nervous.

He didn't know what he was supposed to do or how he was supposed to talk with Merlin once he got here, not after…after what he had dreamed. Okay, that dream hadn't been the first time Arthur had tried picturing Merlin in some kind of naked and vulnerable state. Honestly, he had probably spent too much time imagining what his consort looked like without his clothes on. But there'd been reasons for that, extenuating situations, if one wanted to call it. First, the man had grown obsessed with the idea of punishing Merlin for all the misconceived sins he had cast upon Arthur. All the embarrassment Merlin had caused toward him, embarrassments that weren't really embarrassing at all, he could see that now, but it had always led to the same thoughts. Arthur wanting the consort to be beneath his power, stripped down to the vulnerability of his skins, allowing Arthur to strip off each layer of skin until the prince was in complete and utter possession of that boy's bloody heart. And then things had changed, all those rumors about Merlin had started, and suddenly, the punishments didn't seem to matter as much.

Not those kinds of punishments, at least.

Arthur had readjusted his thoughts, and his days had ended up spent with the agonizing aftermath of wondering what Merlin was doing. And with who he had been doing it with. Merlin on his hands and knees and allowing some stranger to defile him and his hole from behind. Merlin down on his knees, allowing the stranger to pillage his mouth as if Merlin's mouth was Merlin's to give away to any unworthy fool, and not Arthur's to grant somebody the honor of doing the sexual act…the joke would be on them. For Arthur would never allow anybody to spill their worthless seed down that glorious throat…how many times had all these thoughts swirled in Arthur's mind. Merlin on his back, while holding open his own legs so some worthless man who didn't know how to use his cock as it should be, could give him some pitiful form of pleasure. Merlin sitting right on top of said stranger's lap, taking his own pleasure in hand as he rode himself on that pitiful cock, unable to reach completion because the disgrace of a man didn't know how to treat him right. Didn't know how to take Merlin into hand as the other boy craved, didn't know that Merlin was a defiant creature that only needed to be flung across somebody's lap and pinned there with a firm hand on the back. Didn't know that Merlin would screech like an angry bird, ready to go in for the kill if he wasn't tamed, and that it would take more than a handful of harsh slaps against that supple backside to make him quiet and pliable to a man's whims.

To one man's whims…

It had been many weeks since Arthur had thought back to how things used to be for him, many weeks since Arthur had considered such things. Everything had gone upside down in his world…Merlin had turned his world upside down without even trying. The poisoning had happened, and then the thousands of revelations he had learned during those days, the thousands of revelations he was still learning about Merlin today, and the thousands of revelations that he was sure he didn't know yet. Arthur had only barely scratched the surface on what was going on beneath Merlin's skin, and then…then Arthur had to go on and have that bloody dream. The first dream he had EVER had of Merlin, that dreadful dream that made chills shoot down his spine every time he thought of it, which was every minute since he had woken up this morning…it made sense though, that Arthur wouldn't be able to escape from Merlin even inside of his own dreams. It had really only been a matter of time before Merlin became a feature in a dream.

Just…not that kind of dream.

Arthur's pacing in front of the doors was probably starting to look a bit manic to anybody who saw him, but Arthur didn't care…what could have possessed him to have such a…such a…such a dream! About Merlin of all people! Arthur had already decided it was because of what he had been thinking about before he fell asleep…restless because he was sure Lancelot and Merlin was doing all the same things in Merlin's chambers, and holding onto his neckerchief during his sleep probably hadn't helped matters. It had tricked his brain, and it placed himself into the dream, made him part of it in a way the prince never would've agree with if he had been conscious about what was going on. But despite all of these excuses, it didn't hide the fact that Arthur had STILL HAD THAT ONE DREAM TO BEGIN WITH! It was disdainful, and disgraceful, and sinful, and god if his father ever knew such a thing existed in his mind…

Arthur bit back another wild curse, not caring if he looked as mad as he felt he was…Arthur was mad! He was absolutely, completely, bonkers. He hadn't been an unwilling participant, his mind foggy as the dream controlled his actions as if he was under the control of an intense puppet master. Arthur had been in control of everything. He remembered touching Merlin's skin in the dark, and he could remember feeling those gasps ripped out of Merlin as if they belonged to him sorely. He remembered deciding to grope Merlin's breasts…his chest, and how taken aback he'd briefly been about him being so flat. But he remembered how very little that meant to him, when his touch made Merlin excited. Arthur could remember grabbing Merlin by the legs, touching that one spot on his thigh, the coin shaped spot Arthur had once wanted to brand with his sigil. Arthur could REMEMBER his decision to press his fingers against Merlin's hole, in-between his soft cheeks, just to see what kind of reaction he could pull from Merlin.

And Merlin hadn't exactly sounded disgusted…

In fact, his reaction was anything but.

Arthur rubbed a subconscious hand across his jawline and cheeks, as if Arthur was trying to see whether or not he had any of Merlin's…substances…that had splattered across his face. He had scrubbed his face raw the second he could find the strength to leave his bed, the second his cock had softened enough to allow him to move, because damn it…fuck the wires in his brain that made him believe Merlin was a woman. And thus, something that Arthur should enjoy as if he was the rarest of deserts. But fuck, even after Arthur had scrubbed and scrubbed and scrubbed, until his face was red and water drained down him in rivers, he still felt the phantom sensations of something on his face. Phantom sensation of something DRIPPING from his face and his eyes and his cheeks…were men usually so messy? Arthur didn't think he had ever been that bad, or was it just Merlin who was like that, or was it just that dream exaggerating everything…

Arthur ripped his hand away from his face, he was being absolutely stupid all over again. He didn't have anything on his face because Merlin hadn't actually been there. Yes, Arthur had woken up harder than he'd ever been in all his life, but he hadn't actually came…that right there said it was nothing but a fluke. If Arthur had really been interested with seeing Merlin's cock jutted out and put on display between his pale thighs like it was in his dream, then surely Arthur would've came even in his sleep. If Arthur was even interested at all, then the prince wouldn't be having a complete and utter meltdown right here where he could be seen by anybody. And it wasn't even like this was the first time he's seeing Merlin since the dream…he saw him on the fields when he had tested Lancelot! He had seen him, and his damn flower crown, and the images from the dream kept resurfacing and surfacing until nothing else seemed to matter other than….what would Merlin look like spread across his sheets with nothing on other than that damn flower crown.

…

…

…

A loud bang came from somewhere on the floor above him, and it had the man flinching where he stood, his heart shooting up into his throat as if he had just been caught sticking his hand down his own pants to finish off whatever fuck it dream he'd been caught in. And his heart started hammering when he heard the familiar sound of heels walking down the hall on the floor above him…and he already knew exactly what he was going to see once he looked up. Only the heels of Morgana could make him feel like trembling on the inside, but with the sound of those heels also came with Merlin attached at her damn hip. And that was what made Arthur feel as if he couldn't breathe, as if he would be alright if the ground opened up beneath him right now and swallowed him whole…felt as if he was burning to ashes and freezing into ice all at the same time. He wasn't ready, this was too soon! By his calculations, Merlin shouldn't be arriving until Arthur had paced a literal hole into the floor, and Arthur hadn't even made the tiniest dent in the stones yet.

Wasn't ready…

Wasn't ready…

Wasn't ready…

Fuck, Arthur was never going to be ready no matter how long Merlin forced him to wait in front of this door. He could stand here for years at a time, never leaving because he knew Merlin would show up for him eventually, and still not be ready for what was to come. He would have to…to TALK to Merlin now, and he would have to INTERACT with him. Arthur was going to say something that is so incredibly stupid, Merlin wouldn't even look at him again. And when one considered all the stupid things Arthur had said to him in the last few days or so alone, the next stupid thing to come out his mouth would end up taking the cake. And the napkins. And the silverware. And the whole damn table to boot.

"Now, just remember what I told you. You are going to have to stand in front of the crowd, off to the side, while Lancelot is being knighted by Uther. Arthur is going to have to stand by you, but try to ignore that. And I'll be standing right on the other side, so hopefully the festivity of the evening won't be incredibly boring." And that would be Morgana, no doubt giving Merlin a rundown on the way he should expect for the evening to go…information that Arthur should be teaching Merlin, if he wasn't such a bloody mess. And who was Morgana to try calling 'him' boring! Boring people didn't have messed up sex dreams towards their husband! Arguably, the one person Arthur SHOULDN'T be having messed up sex dreams about. "But anyway, once the main event is finished with, and it will end once Lancelot has been officially knighted, the real fun can begin with the after party. Pretty much an entire night of drinking and flirting awaiting for us, Merlin."

And Morgana laughed, the sound of her heels telling Arthur that they were just coming down the stairs, and it burned Arthur up, ragged breathing forcing him to not act irrationally. Who did Morgana think she was, trying to encourage the boy to flirt with others, as if he didn't already flirt enough for the both of them to last an entire lifetime. Merlin could LOOK at somebody, and Arthur could've sworn he was flirting with nothing but his eyes alone, but…now wasn't the time for any of that. Now wasn't the time for him to give into those urges, for him to start getting disparage because Merlin was probably saving his flirting now for bloody Lancelot…the Merlin in his dreams would probably only be focused on Arthur…the prince took another ragged breath. Trying to smooth down some of his sweaty hair so he didn't look as fucked up as he was, but…that failed the very second he turned around and saw Merlin, Morgana, and Gwen walking the path down the stairs…

Morgana and Gwen went entirely ignored, fading into the background in a single instant, as if they weren't even there.

But Merlin…Merlin on the other hand, wouldn't leave his bloody sight…he knew that Merlin would wow him. Going from rags to riches. Going from peasant to consort. Going from…nobody to the only person Arthur could see. But…Arthur knew that wasn't entirely right either. Merlin could wear the clothes that were given to him, or the clothes he had came to Camelot with…Arthur would still find his eyes on him. Merlin could be playing in the mud or sneaking into the prince's bedchambers and Arthur would still be torn between panicking about it, or curiosity ebbing away at him until he gave in to watch what would happen next. But…there was just something about Merlin confidently walking around in clothing Arthur had provided for him, that made his heart feel as if somebody was squeezing it, perhaps even Merlin was the one squeezing it between such delicate fingers. Fingers that had, in a dream, slid down along the length of his cock…

Arthur choked, the phantom sensation of that very thing happening, going the path that led from base to tip before it was gone, and still…Arthur wasn't able to take his eyes away from Merlin.

Merlin's face was going a red hue, squawking at Morgana about 'who the hell was he going to flirt with!' as if he hadn't done so much worse. Both in and out of Arthur's dreams. Arthur's eyes fell down to Merlin's feet as the group got to the bottom steps, his toes and calf's encased in dark boots with more buckles along the sides than Arthur could count. He traveled up to the dark pants that covered each and every curve as if it was something special, hiding nothing as far as the prince could see, the dark belt with the small silver buckle being the only thing keeping them in place. Up the long sleeve tunic…good god…Arthur thought he was about to pass out as the floor swayed beneath him, Arthur did know his fabrics from a lifetime of being dressed to impress. And he knew that tunic was one hundred percent silk…Arthur could feel the phantom sensations of his dream creeping back on him…Merlin's nipples being softer than the silk tunic could ever be. Arthur couldn't see the long length of Merlin's neck, and that itself was a shame, a crime against nature…maybe Arthur should have a talk with Madame Teresa so all of Merlin's outfits showed off his neck. Merlin usually hid it beneath his neckerchief's, and Arthur rarely got to see the soft skin…it almost felt like the forbidden fruit to him. Something he should never see, as if Merlin's neck was the same sin as seeing Merlin's private bits would be…his hair alone was all combed down. And Arthur's hands ACHED to be put in there so he could mess it up into his usual wayward style.

But the cape…Merlin was wearing an honest to god cloak tucked neatly over his shoulders, as black as the rest of the outfit. Except for the insides…as red as the Pendragon crest was, as red as Arthur's signature color was…the prince was sure, as sure as he was anything, that Merlin was going to kill him tonight. The way that Merlin walked had the cape fluttering out behind him, it made his consort look as if he had wings coming out of his shoulders. Like it was honest to god wings…the kind of wings that an angel would have. Like the dark angel Arthur always thought Merlin to be…all the blood seemed to drain straight out of Arthur's head when he saw that. His secret little nickname for Merlin, it had came to life right before his very eyes, and Arthur wasn't entirely sure whether or not he was still dreaming. Merlin couldn't be a dark angel, he couldn't be…

But he was.

And Arthur didn't know how to handle that.

The outfit was so similar to what Merlin had worn the last time, being dark and deadly to any unworthy person bringing their eyes onto him. But the last one…it had been more delicate and subtle. Bringing attention to Merlin without the overwhelming quality that this new one had. But this new outfit had obviously been designed to bring Merlin the maximum attention, had been designed with the sole idea of Merlin being in the eyes of the people tonight. The red scheme looking as if the wings of Arthur's dark angel were covered in blood, the blood of the attackers who died screaming after Arthur was done with them. Both of his hands were shaking again as Arthur's eyes once again rose up onto the hollow of Merlin's throat, where he could see a very familiar trinket, which only tied the whole outfit together.

"You're wearing the Whytt Crest!"

The words were blurted out of Arthur before he could think twice about what he was saying, only realizing how much he had already fucked up afterwards, when the small group of three went quiet after he announced himself. Merlin's hand, standing out white and pale amongst his black robes, shot up fast, so he could cover up the crest and hide it from Arthur's view. Arthur's stomach went straight back down to his feet, he had known this evening was going to end in ruins before it even begun. Merlin was acting as if Arthur was about to try and steal the thing right off his neck, rip it off as if Merlin had no right to where the crest of another. And yes, it was…unorthodox to wear your former family crest after you've already became part of a new family, but…Arthur wasn't going to do anything to stop him. Arthur had given it to Gaius, so in a way…this almost felt as if Merlin was wearing something from him. A gift he otherwise would've never accepted. He wouldn't do anything that would jeopardize Merlin actually taking a gift from him…

"My uncle deemed I was worthy enough to wear it for the festivities. So don't bother wasting your breath about it. I can assure you, none of my many, many admires passed it along to me. So there's no reason to get upset this time." he said bluntly, his eyes drilling into Arthur's, so unlike the dream Merlin had done, and it felt like the prince was being picked apart by the boy in a mere second, before Merlin was turning back to Morgana and Gwen. "This whole ceremony, is Uther going to tap Lancelot on the shoulders with the blade? That's how the elders in the village used to explain it, but I don't think I've seen one before. Is he a steady hand? Because I doubt we'll be having much fun if Lancelot ends up bleeding to death. Has that ever happened before, somebody dropping the blade on the knight?"

Morgana started giggling, before telling a very amusing story about the time Sir Wellington had decided he would knight his own personal knight, only he fumbled at the last minute and nearly chopped his knight's arm off during the process…okay, maybe it wasn't the most amusing story considering how much blood there had been. But the story itself didn't matter…Merlin had gone and snubbed him. Turned his back on him as if Arthur wasn't even here…the blond prince tethered on the outside of the group. For the first time in his entire life, feeling like he was very much the outsider. Unwanted. Uncertain about what it was he should do to reclaim a bit of attention…if he even wanted attention. He wanted to keep his distance from Merlin…maybe his distance meant he did not have to deal with anymore dreams. But Arthur's feet were planted on the floor, unmoving, as if nails had been shoved through his boots and keeping him right there. In arms reach of Merlin, but still so far…Arthur brought a hand up to the back of his neck, feeling the stale sweat clinging onto him like a second skin.

"Errr…perhaps this is a conversation that can be talked about after everything is over with? I'm sure that the festivities are about to start soon, and we can't exactly walk in during the middle and distract everybody-" Arthur trailed off as the three turned back to him, as MERLIN turned back to him…looking at HIM as if he was the idiot for interrupting their very important conversation about how Sir Wellington's Knight now refused to have anything to do with him after being nearly crippled by the Lord. Arthur wanted to run a hand throughout his hair as the anxiousness started getting to him, but he was sweating so much, he was positive the sweat would make it stand up at odd angles if he did. The prince averted his eyes, uncertain about how to speak with Merlin, "I mean…it won't be a good look, is all. You were the one that put forth Lancelot's name to me. So not being late is very important, I'm sure you understand that much…"

Merlin was giving Arthur a deadpan stare, uninterested in anything that Arthur had to say, and Arthur's belly clenched in trepidation with nerves. Merlin had been a lot more…vibrant, in his dream. And even out on the field, Merlin ended up glowing with a false innocence, but Arthur would blame the flower crown on that one. But…Merlin was still his dark angel, and Arthur's eyes darted from his dark hair, to his frowning lips, to his blood red lined cape, and down to his dark boots all over again. Arthur didn't know where he was supposed to look, he did not even know where was APPROPRIATE to look…surely it wasn't wrong should the prince stare blankly at Merlin's large left earlobe. Just so he wouldn't end up trapped in Merlin's eyes, forced to feel the trepidation building up inside of him until he KNEW Merlin knew what he was thinking about. Until he KNEW the consort could read him with a single glance, and knew Arthur had been having odder than normal thoughts about him. But then, Merlin had to do the worse of things, possibly the worse thing he could've done. He swallowed. This bastard just swallowed, and Arthur's eyes latched onto what little he could see of that boy's throat, landing on Merlin's Adam's apple, the very thing Arthur had been scraping his teeth against in his dream.

"Yes…we wouldn't want to be late. But why don't you just go on ahead and I'll join you at the front once it's actually started. I am sure that my conversation with Morgana is more…interesting than whatever awkwardness I'll be having when it's just you, me, and your father." Merlin spat out at him, still unwilling to give Arthur one single bloody inch, even after Arthur had punished those men and then passed his apparent lover within the same twenty four hours. Arthur could feel his eye starting to twitch violently, his awkward smile becoming just a bit more strained around the edges as Merlin turned back to Morgana, "Now, before we were rudely interrupted. You were telling me what repercussions Sir Wellington had to face after grievously injuring his knight?"

A muscle somewhere in Arthur's jawline started to jump, his eyes trailing down Merlin's form, his stance a little TOO casual to actually be casual…he'd bloody well known it. Merlin didn't fucking care about Sir Wellington or anything about what had gone on with this particular incident three bloody years ago. He was just doing it because he knew it would get under Arthur's skin, tormenting the prince in the only way he publicly could, with the function behind them only a few minutes from actually beginning. And Arthur wanted to show Merlin that it wasn't going to be so easy to disrupt him, but…Arthur already knew that this is one fight he wasn't going to win. How could he give the boy any proper verbal sparring when Arthur could hardly even think straight. His eyes had done gone and fell down the long planes of Merlin's chest…his shirt was so bloody silky, it was smooth…would probably feel like water slipping through his fingers should he try to touch it. And Arthur's eyes drifted a bit higher, growing darker as the prince stared at approximately where Merlin's nipples would be found…did his consort like his nipples being touched? Would he have enjoyed it, like he did in Arthur's dream, if the prince softly scraped his thumb against the nubs, giving it the encouragement it needed to form a peak. What would be softer…the top itself, or Merlin's rosy nipples by the time Arthur was done with them, straining in desperation until not even the tunic could shield them from view. Would the consort allow his hand to creep under the tunic, across his trembling belly, to the hidden little nubs and test their softness for himself, or is that completely out of the question…

"Merlin, I understand that you don't really want to be stuck in any conversation with me, but surely we can just stand at the front and wait together. I can't go into a party without my husband, it wouldn't be proper if I went in and left you unescorted inside." Arthur said, feeling like he was stumbling and tripping over his words just to get that out. He knew it was wrong, and he knew that he was probably going to hell just for thinking it, but…the dream Merlin's nipples were stuck in his mind now. Dream Merlin's whimpers echoing somewhere inside the back of his mind until he felt like the floor was swaying beneath him. Was there any similarities between his Dream Merlin and the Real Merlin? Would the real Merlin react the same as dream Merlin had…was Arthur more invested in these answers than he should be…probably. The prince started again, "I-if you-you'd just t-tak-take my arm. We-we can go in and-just a-a few minut-minutes won't kill-kill you. And you'd hard-hardly notice I'm there once Lan-Lancelot comes-comes inside."

Arthur could feel the deep red flush of embarrassment rising to his cheeks as he dragged his eyes away from Merlin's covered nipples, trying to pretend as if he wasn't still stuck wondering what it would be like to scrape his tongue over the pair of them. And he held his arm out weakly towards Merlin, he just knew he was going to flinch the second Merlin touched him. Positive that the touch of a dark angel had enough power to make him burst into flames…Arthur sure felt as if he could burst into flames right now. The ravenous beating of his own heart sure didn't feel as if it was going to stop anytime soon, and the sweating was only getting worse, and damn it! Why did Arthur have to have such a vivid and off putting dream. Arthur would have been more competent, and suave, than he was being right now if that stupid dream hadn't interrupted the flow he had going on with Merlin. The flow that had been…getting him nowhere, but it was still a better flow than the disaster he was right now! Arthur blamed that stupid silk tunic, blamed the stupid red lined cloak, blamed Merlin for refusing to have his nipples on display so Arthur could satisfy his own curiosity…

"…You know, I actually think that's pretty funny. I don't seem to recall having you ask me if I wanted to go in with you. You just seem to assume that I'll be willing to take you on as my date." Merlin noted, after eyeing Arthur's arm in deep contempt, sniffing as if Arthur was beneath him, but it only made Arthur so aware of his own body odor. "But, I suppose that's just your style, isn't it? Assuming I'm willing to follow your word without thought or reason. Assuming I'm willing to go on, what is basically, another date without being asked. But I don't think I'm quite so interested in repeating the events that happened the LAST time you coerced me into a date."

Arthur's jaw dropped a little…that was what this was about, the prince thought as he shot another look towards the closed doors. He could see the similarities now though…and obviously, Merlin had as well. Arthur remembered the way he had tricked Merlin into going to the marketplace with him, convinced if he just gave the boy one good memory of him-a date-than it could start clearing all of the air between them. It had been a disaster from beginning to end, and it had ended with Merlin storming off as if he couldn't get away from the prince fast enough. Arthur hadn't asked Merlin back then either, had actually tried hiding from Merlin that they were, in-deed, on a date. And here they were now, going on what most nobility would consider, a date. But…Arthur was just so bloody confused here. They were married! It made sense that they would go to these kinds of events together! It was expected, both from the people and from the prince himself. Who ELSE would Arthur attend something like this with?

"I don't understand you, Merlin. You're the consort to the prince, and this is a very important event. You know that your duty is to stand by my side so we'll be able to get this over with. You know that my father would want us to attend this event together." Arthur fumbled over his words, at a total loss as he tried to make sense of the situation. Merlin KNEW the facts of life. There wasn't any reason for Arthur to 'ask him' to attend an event when they both already knew what was to be expected. "I'm sorry that you're still upset about the way that I tricked you into going to the marketplace with me. But that is hardly the point, isn't it? Who else would the Consort of Camelot go with, if not with the prince of Camelot?"

Arthur pointed helplessly at himself, as if Merlin could've somehow missed the fact that his princely husband was standing right there. Merlin was just trying to taunt him again, wasn't he? The notion of a prince asking their consort just to attend an event together was…such a strange concept. That was something one did when they were just beginning the courtship process and still feeling out the waters of their relationship. A MARRIED COUPLE had no need doing the same thing. Unless…Arthur's heart seized painfully in his chest…unless the reason Merlin was complaining about this now, was because he had gotten a better offer already. Maybe Lancelot had asked Merlin to accompany him as a date, after his knighting ceremony, but…surely Merlin would've said no. It was one thing for Merlin to have his affairs, but then to go parading them in front of the entire court? In front of the very people that treated him so awfully? Even Merlin had to know, waving his lover in front of his father's face, would only be the cause for their 'relationship' to end. Lancelot would've been stripped of his new rank and tossed in the cells, Merlin would probably be grounded inside of his chambers until he could control his urges, and Arthur…Arthur would be left to deal with both the fallout and the humiliation left behind.

"Wow, Arthur. I knew there was a true romantic under all that chainmail you've got going on. Talking about duties, telling me about my expectations as if I do not already know what they are, basically telling me that I'm obligated to walk in that room with you! When you can't even utter up a few measly little words and 'ask me' if I'm willing to do this with you." Merlin started off, the redness in his face going steadily darker as his irritation rose, his blue eyes almost looked to be glowing in their intensity. And Arthur shrunk in on himself, his arm falling limply at his side…romantic? It seemed to be the only word that the prince was now stuck on…Merlin wanted to be romanced. Not by him, of course, but the consort clearly expected a bit more…effort, than what Arthur was giving to him right now. The prince almost felt chastised, despite how surreal this moment actually was, "Shame on you, Arthur Pendragon. I think I would rather go on my own, than spend another evening attached to your arm like I'm nothing but an accessory meant to please your father and the masses. Let's see how the people react when their great prince is the one alone for once."

Arthur opened and closed his mouth several times, at a total loss for words…he could not even muster up the strength to continue glancing at Merlin's little nipples and panicking about why he was so interested in what shade of pink they were. He wasn't…Merlin wasn't supposed to pick now to continue with his rebellious streak. Merlin was supposed to go into the festivities as expected, and then yell at Arthur all he wanted once they were somewhere more private and less likely to be overheard. This wasn't…Merlin wasn't supposed to do this because Arthur wasn't…romantic…enough for their fake marriage. But, there is a dark whisper in the back of his mind, a whisper that made Arthur wish that he could gnaw helplessly on his lip…Lancelot was probably romantic. That was probably how Merlin fell in love with the guy despite all the other conquests he had been with in the past. Lancelot looked as if he would be a romantic, ready to swoop in for any young gentlemen to be swooned off their feet. Most likely, Lancelot had already taken Merlin out on a dozen private dates, dates that just made Arthur's one pitiful attempt look as…pitiful as it had been. And all Arthur had done was held out his arm and told Merlin to 'get on with it.' But how was he supposed to know Merlin was so dead set on being…asked. Most LIKED to be on the arm of a prince, even people who held onto reasonable deep seated grudges against him would hold their tongue just to be on his arm.

"Well, how do you think the people are going to react when their consort walks into the room alone. I mean, you already seem to be public enemy number one, and wouldn't you going alone just confirm that? People would think you're the one that upset me, and I made you go because I couldn't be bothered to look at you or something." Arthur blurted out when he finally got his mouth to start working again, and because Arthur was a bloody MORON, he didn't realize his own stupidity until after they had already left his mouth. Until after he said the dreaded words that cemented Merlin's decision…and all because he had been too bloody stubborn to swallow his bloody pride and ASK Merlin to continue their charade of a marriage just for tonight. Before Merlin went back to hating him on sight like was usual these days. Arthur panicked and quickly tried his best to backtrack, "No! No, no, no, no! That's not what I meant. Merlin! I did not mean to…to throw what's been happening to you back in your face. And it wasn't a threat either! I'm not going to…encourage rumors like that to start up and fuel the fires. In fact, I'm going to stop them! Yes, I'm going to tell all who will listen that it was my idea…that you…value your independence and wanted to be seen in your own right. So that you weren't just…an accessory, as you've said, to me…"

Arthur, for once in his bloody life, wished that he could simply swallow up his tongue and stop talking. Stop digging himself into a bigger and bigger hole, a hole so big that Arthur could've literally buried himself in it. The glaciers that formed in Merlin's eyes spoke volumes…Arthur wasn't going to be forgiven for this transgression. Arthur had simply been trying to convince Merlin to come in with him, without…sullying himself further than he already had been, what, with all the staring at Merlin's chest he'd been doing and all the odd thoughts he'd been stuck having. Arthur was a prince, he demanded for things to go his way, so that's what he had basically fallen back on. He didn't ASK for things to happen, like Merlin wanted from him. But he wondered now if he should've just swallowed his pride and bloody well done it, if only for the boy to stop looking at him as if he had just killed his puppy or something.

"Don't bother explaining yourself. I already know that you don't give a fuck on what others need from you. Some prince you are, defending me like I'm some sort of damsel in distress when it comes to public affairs. But the second we are back in a somewhat private place, you revert back to who you've always been, and then expect me to just fall in line and go with it. Well not tonight, or any other night Arthur Pendragon. This is our first event since I drunk POISON to save your worthless hide, but this is the precedence I'm going to set from now on. Attending your events does not mean I have to attend them while I'm hanging off your arm like a leach." Merlin exclaimed, jabbing his finger roughly in Arthur's direction as he really let the prince have it, and Arthur watched with helpless abandonment, knowing he had absolutely no way to fix this. The other boy HAD drunk poison for him, and what had Arthur done…deny him his basic rights as a human. So what if Merlin wanted the basic decency that came with being ASKED to an event. Was it really such a big deal for Arthur, even being a Prince, to grovel on his hands and knees for Merlin's attendance. To his father, the answer would've been a solid Yes. But Arthur was finding it hard to agree with that right now. "And besides, you bloody well said I'm going to attend this thing alone? You might be my husband, but that doesn't mean there aren't any others that would GLADLY walk in with me, and spend the evening not running off the first chance they get because they can't stand to be in my presence for any longer than necessary."

Arthur went rigid…remembering all the times he had walked away from Merlin for one reason or the other during previous events. Remembering all the times he had allowed Merlin's company to vanish from his sight because he deemed other things more worthy of his time…he hadn't even stayed by Merlin at their wedding party! It had taken him who knows how long before realizing that the consort had disappeared, too caught up in trying to be louder than his friends. And of course Merlin was sick of it…Merlin needed the attention just as Arthur always felt like he needed Merlin's. And now that Merlin had already deemed himself through with Arthur…this was probably the moment Merlin was going to confess everything to him. Confess how he…fell in love with Lancelot, and how he was going to leave the party as soon as he could to celebrate with his new boyfriend proper…probably consummate a fucking engagement all their own, in a way Arthur had been too scared to do on their wedding night. This was all just a bit too much for Arthur, he wasn't sure how he was going to react to Merlin's blatant and public disregard for him…Merlin turned away from the prince and back to Morgana and Gwen.

"Ladies, would you accompany me for the night?"

Arthur was pretty sure his jaw could drop no lower as he took in the scene that had just taken place right in front of him, too surprised by the turn of events to do anything more than gaping as Morgana laughed unladylike before taking his consort's offered arm. And after a moment of meek nervousness in the face of Arthur, Gwen took hold of the other…highly inappropriate for any serving girl to do. But she did, and Merlin strode past Arthur without another glance towards him…Arthur was baffled, watching as the group of three disappeared inside of the chambers. Merlin hadn't mentioned Lancelot at all as a date. He had gone and instead, asked both Morgana and Gwen out right in front of him…it wasn't a real date, obviously. Who's ever heard of a date with three people? Who has ever heard of a gay man going on a date with two women? But Arthur was still left to flounder, left with the embarrassment that came with going in all alone, and left without Merlin there to keep him sane.

X

Merlin Pendragon could honestly say, he hadn't been expected to be so riled up by Arthur's complete lack of effort…it wasn't as if Merlin had spent all this time expecting a hand written invitation to show up at his door, asking for the consort to accompany his husband. He hadn't even thought of an invite until he was already standing in front of Arthur…he already had this plan, to ignore Arthur completely and utterly no matter what he did. Because he didn't want to mess up Lancelot's big night with a fight before it had even begun. But the way Arthur had held his arm out to him, as if he expected Merlin would just go on and take it…it had rubbed him the wrong way. And then he had remembered what Morgana had told him…many months ago, when he had first met her just before he had been married…she had warned him to ask Arthur for things. To make him squirm because Arthur was used to everything being handed over to him, well…Merlin had wanted to make him bloody well squirm.

And Arthur had proven exactly what Merlin already knew…

The bloody Prince had too much PRIDE to ever lower himself to the same kind of standards a peasant would have. Because a peasant would never expect or take for granted that they had somebody to attend things with. If it had been Merlin, he would have asked his husband each and every time something was going on, but…Merlin supposed this was the only way somebody like the other man could ever expect to have a date. If it wasn't by tricking them, then it was by expectations and obligations and…Merlin wasn't exactly big on following all the rules society enforced on them. If Arthur couldn't swallowed his pride then Merlin could enjoy the party without him. If Arthur couldn't do this one thing to make him happy, then…Merlin had no energy to continue the charade they had going on for the people. It was pointless, and Merlin's fun evening didn't have time for pointless things.

Besides, Merlin thought as he made his way to where the king was standing at the front of the room, the people standing on either side of the room, leaving a small aisle in the center, he had just proven all of Arthur's little tricks were only that…tricks. Arthur's sudden defense for him…the way he jumped in front and center the second he saw something 'disrespectful' towards Merlin…how he's all of a sudden 'interested' in Merlin and what he's doing…that horrid date he had tricked Merlin on…tearing apart those men on the field and arresting the knights that had tried to kill him…nothing more than tricks! And anything else that Arthur had done over the last few days…his possessiveness, claiming he didn't like Lancelot's closeness to Merlin, wanting to 'protect him'…nothing but more tricks! All of those events could arguably be considered public, just one way for Arthur to show the people he 'valued' his consort. The same consort that had caught the eye of the people. But the second they were semi-alone, Arthur just reverted back to his demanding self. Clearly, Arthur was just trying to get ahead of the shifting tides, and stay on the good side of his people long before Merlin won them over for good.

But fuck him.

MERLIN was going to be the one the people wanted, though it still remained unseen on whether they would want HIM or his head on a silver platter. But no matter, just let Arthur try one of his useless tricks on him again, the consort thought as he and the girls took their place off to the side as instructed…there was a rare glitter of determination shining in his eyes that went unnoticed. The kind of determination that was more calculated, then covered up by his anger as it usually was…just let Arthur try and trick him. He clearly didn't know who he was dealing with if he thought Merlin would fall for such petty things. But, first…Lancelot was going to take center stage in Merlin's life. The prince had already ruined many of his firsts…his first kiss, his first date, his first marriage …he wasn't going to let Arthur ruin his first knighting ceremony.

Because unlike Arthur, Lancelot DESERVED the honor he would be receiving tonight.