Morning breezes at sea were ever refreshing and enjoyable. The smells, the sounds, the sunlight… Suki welcomed all of it gladly with a bright smile, her eyes half-lidded, her hair dancing in the wind.
It had always been a secret pleasure of hers, running off to the beach as a child just before sunrise so she could watch the light spread and touch every wave gradually, coloring the world and making it bright again. It was even better if she caught glimpses of the Unagi, or the Elephant Kois.
She could hardly believe she was experiencing those sensations again now. It was especially hard to believe she felt as comfortable as she did, as satisfied, and at such peace… the last years had been harsh and unkind to her, it was no secret. But as of late her luck had changed for the better, and she could look at the future without the awful sense of impending doom that she had endured during the past eight years. She couldn't know for sure, but she was confident that the worst was behind her. Her recent past had been decidedly horrible, but her present, on the other hand…
A pair of strong arms surrounded her from behind and lifted her suddenly, making Suki yelp in surprise. She heard Zuko's now-familiar chuckle as he swept her off her feet quite literally, twirling her in place before setting her down again, allowing her to turn and look at him: the smile on his face matched hers.
"Good morning," he said, beaming. She laughed and threw her arms around his neck.
"Good morning to you too, Zuko," she said, kissing his lips and hugging him tight.
He held her and buried his face in her hair, and Suki sighed in bliss. It was early, so most the crew would still be abed. It was why Zuko would dare surprise her as he just had, since he usually would be uneasy about public displays of affection. Suki had accepted that he'd rather keep their exchanges private, but she still found a bit of mischievous enjoyment in kissing his cheek in front of his men. He'd blush so deeply, and everyone would laugh… it was, perhaps, something silly to be so amused and elated by, but she treasured every pleasant feeling she had found with Zuko all the same.
"Was it a good sunrise?" Zuko asked. Suki nodded promptly.
"You should join me in watching them one of these days," she said. Zuko smiled awkwardly.
"The only reason I don't is because I'm usually too tired in the mornings," he said, with a crooked grin. Suki bit her lip. "And I'm sure you know just why."
"What? I have no idea what you're talking about…" she said, looking up at him with her best pretense of innocence. Zuko only laughed.
"You sure don't," he said, beaming and pressing his forehead to hers.
He took the initiative to kiss her deeply this time around, and naturally, Suki responded in kind. Only, lost in their exchange as they were, they only realized they weren't alone on deck a little too late for Zuko to save face…
"Eeeeh, show him who's boss, Suki!" shouted one of the most shameless sailors, as others hooted.
Zuko broke off the kiss with the deepest blush yet as Suki laughed, her cheeks reddening as well. She couldn't get enough of his awkwardness, and clearly, neither could the rest of the crew. Lieutenant Jee approached Zuko and clapped him on the shoulder in a congratulatory gesture, and the exiled prince only hid his face in his hand. Suki didn't hold back her laughter, sliding her hand into his so she could lead him to breakfast before the rest of the men beat them there.
Their days at sea had been unexpectedly enjoyable. Suki hadn't expected to find any comfort in traveling on a Fire Nation vessel amid so many soldiers, for obvious reasons, but she was finding it far more interesting than she ever thought it could be. Zuko's men had been somewhat distant at first, but after the first few weeks they had grown a lot more spirited, and they often regaled Suki with anecdotes of what Zuko had been like during their first trip to find the Avatar. She loved the stories, though her lover clearly was embarrassed by most of them. He had been quite an angry young man, from what Suki could gather, and whenever Zuko reacted unfavorably to their recollections it was easy to see glimpses of his more temperamental self. Nevertheless, his men mostly laughed off his reactions by now, since they liked to tease Zuko over his brand-new relationship just to coax those outbursts from him. And since Suki found his blushes rather endearing, Zuko stopped taking much offense to their teasing after some time.
Yet life on the ship could get boring, too, since nobody seemed to know where they were headed. All they did was sail, as if waiting for a sign from the heavens to tell them where to go. But Zuko, despite what the rest of the men believed, had drawn plans from their very first day at sea. The only reason he hadn't explained anything was because Suki's joining them had changed his ideas rather drastically… but Zuko had never been as happy to have his plans thwarted than he had been this time.
The sailors spent hours on end playing Pai Sho, singing and dancing, eating and even sparring to pass the time, whereas Zuko spent most hours behind closed doors with Suki. He had been rather nervous about taking their relationship to new levels at first, but after Suki had taken her time and made great efforts to ensure he would feel at ease, he had finally given her his all in an exciting yet quick tryst he had wished had lasted longer. Fortunately for him, Suki had been elated about the act itself, so much that she hadn't cared about how long it had lasted.
His initial reservations had been for obvious reasons, but soon he realized that she had needed to sleep with him precisely to take another step forward in her own recovery. Once he understood that, he dedicated himself fully to her body, always making sure to give her joy and pleasure even if he still was learning how to achieve that. He would perform to the top of his game every time, even if he knew he had much left to learn yet, and she was certain to thank him for it every time, with the sweetest kisses Zuko had ever tasted.
They were almost constantly together, only apart once in a while, whenever Suki decided to help with the chores on the ship. Zuko had told her she didn't need to do that, but she had insisted: her helpfulness surely had a hand in making the rest of the men warm up to her, and so, their trip had become surprisingly pleasant for both the crew and their two passengers.
Zuko's wrecked plans had taken new shape by now, though: he had been at a loss for what to do during their first weeks, but after a few pillow talks, he had settled on where he wanted to go with Suki. He had requested his ship captain to change course towards the south, and so they had spent many days traveling in that direction by now, stopping at a few ports to replenish their resources before setting out anew.
The food was running out again, though, as was apparent when they sat for breakfast to find bowls of rice with scarce side dishes. Most of the men at the ship's dining room were groaning about their food shortage, but they didn't complain too much: they would be docking at Whaletail Island today, and they would be free to buy as much food as they pleased – or, rather, as much as they could spend on – once they got there.
"We'll have a few hours to enjoy Whaletail Island, won't we?" Lieutenant Jee asked Zuko, who nodded.
"We can spend the night in the city. I thought the crew might like that," Zuko said.
"Oh, why… I think we would indeed," Jee said, raising his eyebrows approvingly. The other crew members present hooted in delight.
"Yeah! That's what I'm talking about!" exclaimed one of the sailors, grinning broadly.
Suki smiled as she watched them rejoice, and she reached for the rice bowl to offer a second serving to Zuko, who smiled and accepted her offer gratefully. Zuko twitched when he sensed Jee's gaze upon him, and he glanced at the man to find him smirking.
"What?" he growled. Jee chuckled.
"Who knew all it took to make you nicer to your crew was bringing your girl on board for the trip," he said, winking at Suki. Suki laughed softly as Zuko blushed deeply.
"I-if you don't like it, I can just go back to how I used to treat you, then!" he exclaimed, trying to sound menacing, but Jee only laughed more.
"Dear heavens, no! Please, stay happy and blissful with your beloved, we don't want the old angry Prince back," said Jee, laughing as he focused on his food again.
"Don't feel bad, Zuko," said Suki, smiling and stroking his forearm as he got started on his second serving. "They're just happy you're happy."
"Or they're just happy they have something to tease me about," Zuko muttered.
Yet Suki's smiling face was the best way to soothe his embarrassment, he had found. He grinned a little as well before focusing fully on his plate, ignoring the conversations between the others. He wasn't one given to public displays of affection with Suki indeed, nor did he like to discuss their relationship in front of the others…
But that didn't mean he was any less passionate when they were by themselves, as he proved to her only a half-hour later. His breath brushed against her neck as he pressed her to the wall, her fingers sliding through his hair, weak gasps slipping past her lips. He raked her skin with his mouth, his hands exploring the body he had already grown fully acquainted with, his inner fire flaring with love and lust at once. He wanted her, and that desire was equally matched by his desire to please her. The forces that drove him always resulted in the most enjoyable experiences for his lover.
Zuko's cabin wasn't far from where he had succumbed to his desire for Suki. Too often he failed to understand why she had chosen him, why she had wanted him… he had, in his honest opinion, a long way to go before he could finally start putting his life together. But she had accepted that and embraced him fully, both physically and figuratively, just as he was. She took in his flaws, his virtues, his passion. She knew when to encourage him, and she knew just when to make him stop, too. Zuko trusted her judgment far more than he could trust his own.
And as they were, she was only going to encourage him further. There was no way she would stop him when her legs were already trembling, when her hands were fumbling with his clothes as she sought to touch him, too.
"Your room…" Suki gasped. Zuko groaned in response.
"Yeah… my room," he repeated, before kissing her deeply.
He lifted her, so her legs would surround his waist, and carried her off without further ado. Suki reached out to shut the door behind them once they were inside, and she didn't focus on anything but Zuko as he delighted her with his touch and kisses, with his shortness of breath once he was inside her, with his gasping of her name with every thrust…
They lay on their cot afterwards, gazing at each other. His fingers dragged over her exposed body, with gentle caresses.
"Are we really going to do this, Zuko?" she whispered, their foreheads pressed together. He smiled a little.
"Do you think it won't work?"
"No, it's just… well, they could probably take us all the way there, right? We don't need to take the emergency ship on our own. The waters can be treacherous down here."
"I'm aware, I've sailed here before. I actually passed by Kyoshi Island long ago, but I only sent my men to search the town for the Avatar…"
"Wait, that was you?" Suki exclaimed, her eyes wide. Zuko blinked a few times.
"You were still there back then, huh? Well, I can't say I'm surprised," he said, smiling weakly. "My men came running back to the ship saying nobody had word from the Avatar there, but that they couldn't stay to search because a group of girls had forced them to flee. I bet I know just who was leading them…"
"Yes, you do," said Suki, laughing softly as she surrounded his neck with her arms. "We were still pretty strong back then. The next raid by Fire Nation forces we faced, though, wasn't so harmless…"
Zuko swallowed had but Suki smiled and kissed his nose. He sighed and hugged her tight.
"I'm sorry you went through something like that…" he whispered.
"I'm sorry you have a nasty past yourself, Zuko," she replied, caressing his face gently, her fingers grazing his scar. Few people were allowed to touch the damaged tissue, but nobody had ever done it as often as Suki did. "But we're here now, right? That's what matters most."
"Yeah, that's true. And we'll be in Kyoshi Island in no time," he said, grinning.
"It feels surreal, though… I can't believe I'm actually coming back," she said. Zuko smiled, but his grin waned when he noticed she wasn't as cheerful about it as he expected.
"Why not? Is there something wrong?" he asked. "I mean, I guess this isn't the way you envisioned you'd go back home, but…"
"It's not so much because of you, Zuko," she said, smiling again. "If anything, I'm looking forward to showing you my hometown. But it's just… I hoped the war would be over when I returned. And, well… I also hoped the Fire Nation wouldn't be the one to win it."
"I can't blame you for feeling that way. I wish that weren't the case too," said Zuko, tightening his jaws. "Are you afraid of what we'll find there?"
"Not as much as I could be," said Suki. "Despite the Fire Nation invaded the island, they didn't damage it too much. When I left with Oyaji it wasn't as beautiful as it once had been, but it hadn't been destroyed or so. So I have hopes that things won't be so bad there…"
"You can make a home there again, I'm sure," he said, smiling gently at her.
"We can make a home there: the two of us," she said, grinning back. Zuko chuckled.
"It's still amazing to me that someone wants to share their life with me. And for that someone to be you…"
"You'd better start getting used to it. I'm not going anywhere, Zuko. At least, not without you," she said, kissing him softly.
Whaletail Island was named rather appropriately, for it was shaped exactly as a whale's tail. Zuko and his crew had stopped at one of its ports long ago, back when the banished prince had been scouting the southern lands and seas in his hopeless search for the Avatar. He had searched Whaletail Island as thoroughly as he could, but it had yielded nothing, just as every other search. Nevertheless, he hadn't given up hope on his last visit to this port. Hope was something that had slipped out of his fingers slowly, gradually, until all of it had disappeared by the time his uncle told him they were free to return home.
He returned a different man today, many years later, with the same ship and the same crew, but without his uncle and with an unexpected companion in his arms. They had lain together after the ship docked, waiting an hour or so until the ship was as good as empty. Only a few sailors would remain aboard, but they wouldn't keep tabs on what their Prince meant to do.
"So, we're still sure about this?" Suki asked again, after she finished getting dressed. Zuko, still shirtless, was composing a letter at his bedroom's table.
"We are. This is for the best," he said. "Just give me a moment and we'll go."
Suki sighed and nodded as Zuko finished his letter. She helped him dress up, just after he set the paper on his desk. They left his room, and Zuko surprised Suki by taking her hand in his and leading her out onto the deck. Suki raised an eyebrow.
"I thought we were going to…" she started, but he shook his head.
"You have to see the town, first," he said, smiling. "You'd always wanted to see all sorts of new places, right?"
"Well, that's awfully romantic of you," she conceded, with a sweet grin. "I could use a little sight-seeing."
"Then let's go," he said, intertwining their fingers as they reached the ship's ramp and walked into the port.
Suki had visited several cities, like Fire Fountain City, Ba Sing Se and Yu Dao, during her years as a gladiator. Yet for some reason she had never come to Whaletail Island for a fight, despite there was a Gladiator Arena in town, too. She was somewhat curious as to what it might look like, but as Zuko led her into the gravel streets she found she didn't care enough to ask him to take her there. She was starting a new life beside him, and she was happy to leave her days as a slave far behind herself.
Zuko knew his way around the island, though he seemed put off by the amount of Fire Nation soldiers stationed in the town this time. He whispered to Suki that it hadn't always been this way, and he wondered why it suddenly was now.
"Maybe this is a good place to station troops?" Suki said. Zuko shrugged.
"Seems weird, though. My father has no troops to spare, and Whaletail Island isn't a problematic place with potential rebels or so. It's all Fire Nation now… it used to be an Air Nomad sanctuary, I think, but because of the war it became ours."
"Yeah, I've heard about that…" said Suki, slowing down and bringing a hand up to her face. Zuko stopped and looked at her worriedly.
"Something wrong?" he asked. She shook her head initially, but then she nodded.
"It's nothing, just… do you mind if we stop for a moment?" she asked. Zuko bit his lip.
"Maybe we can stop at a restaurant," he said, his gaze drifting to a nearby one. "Does food seem like a good idea?"
"Eh… well, sure," she said, awkwardly. Zuko smiled happily.
"We'll look like a pretty normal couple, won't we? Having dinner out like this…" he said, chuckling softly as he led her toward the establishment.
"Is it something you'd wanted to do?" Suki asked. Zuko shrugged.
"To be honest I hadn't thought about this kind of casual stuff too much, but now that we're doing it, I guess I did want it," he said. She smiled.
"Happy to make your wishes come true, dear," she said, leaning close and kissing his cheek.
The restaurant was somewhat crowded, but they found a table regardless. Suki excused herself shortly and left Zuko to choose the menu, seeing how he had the money and knew just how much they ought to spend on this quick stop. He had crooked an eyebrow, confused over why she had excused herself at all, but he merely smiled and watched her head to the back of the restaurant before pondering the options for their meal.
There was a restroom in the restaurant, one of the waiters gave Suki directions towards it. She found it and stumbled her way to the sump, noticing a little too late that she had grown too fond of Fire Nation plumbing in the last years. Their innovations in those regards hadn't been spread through the world as much as they should have.
She wiped her mouth after she was done, her stomach still unsettled even though she had released its contents into the hole on the ground just now. This couldn't be good. It made no sense, how was she sick after getting off the ship when she had no bouts of seasickness while she was on board? Maybe she had gotten too used to sailing, could that be it?
Unless… unless that wasn't it. Maybe there was something else that could explain why she was feeling sickly, although she smiled and shook her head at the thought. No, that was ridiculous. It was absolutely ridiculous. Granted she and Zuko had been rather active in bed these days, but that didn't mean anything. It couldn't mean anything, right? Not when she had the suspicion she was likely infertile, the men from Shu Wo had given her some strange herbs back in the day: they had tasted awful, but they were meant to prevent her from getting with child. She had heard them comment that using them too often might leave her barren… but frankly, she had nothing solid to base that belief on other than the word of two unforgivable scumbags. What if that wasn't the case? What if her body was still working fully, unaffected by those herbs and by what those two monsters had done to her?
The idea that she might be carrying Zuko's child floored her. That was something she hadn't considered before… something she wasn't entirely sure she was ready for. She hadn't gotten involved with Zuko while looking at the bigger picture: she didn't think there would be a bigger picture, for starters. It wasn't reasonable for a prince to have a genuine future with a slave, or was it? Yet seeing how things were now, how Zuko was willing to start fresh in Kyoshi Island, with her…
"Maybe he won't hate this, huh?" she whispered, biting her nail briefly before shaking her head. She would find out how he felt about the idea of a child first, and only if he wasn't completely against it, she would tell him of her suspicions. So far, for all she knew, the morning gruel had simply sat badly with her. That was likely all it was…
Zuko greeted her again and she smiled at him as she took her seat across him. His eyes studied her with concern as he stretched a hand to caress hers.
"Everything alright?"
"U-uh, yeah. I just… think I got too used to the ship. My stomach is acting weird now that things are so stable, looks like." she said, chuckling. Zuko smiled.
"Well, I ordered some noodles, if you'd like some," he said. "Unless you're not up for it?"
The idea of noodles sounded incredibly appealing, Suki realized, more so than usual. It made no sense, considering she had thrown up a moment ago, but she really wanted to eat some noodles. She smiled and nodded.
"Noodles sound amazing. Good idea," she said. Zuko smiled and pulled back again, their brief contact ending, to no surprise of Suki's. She was still amazed that he'd held her hand through their walk, undeterred by the idea of being spotted in public while being openly romantic with her.
"Glad you think so," he said, beaming. Suki bit her lip and glanced at him. Clearly, there wasn't much for them to talk about right now, so perhaps it was the proper time to ask the question she had in mind…
"Uh, say, um… you'd always gotten along well with Yuudai, right?" she started. Zuko blinked a few times and shrugged.
"Well enough, yeah. Though he wasn't too happy after my haircut, he enjoyed pulling my ponytail," he said, grinning. "Why'd you ask?"
"It's just… uh, well, I was just curious," she said, smiling. "You like children?"
"Eh, I guess, to a degree," he said. "You know I'm not the most patient guy there is, so I suppose I'm not the best person to keep around kids. Still, Mai didn't seem to mind my short temper and asked me to look after her son several times… though, well, I always suspected she did it in hopes it'd cheer me up. I don't really know why, but it actually helped."
"You two had a relationship once, you said…?" said Suki, raising her eyebrows as a waiter brought two bowls of noodles to their table. She smiled and thanked the man before he walked away.
"Uh, yeah, but we were two silly kids, really," said Zuko, shrugging. "I hadn't even been banished yet. It was ages ago and it made perfect sense for her to move on. Though I didn't take it that well when I found out, but I got over it…"
"So, you may have been silly kids, but you took it pretty seriously, huh?"
"Well, I tend to take things seriously. It's a flaw, I hear," he said. Suki chuckled.
"I think it's endearing, but to each their own, I suppose." she whispered, starting with her noodles. She sighed happily. "Ah, I hadn't had noodles in ages. They're amazing."
"I'm glad you're enjoying them," said Zuko, grinning and picking up his own chopsticks.
They ate silently for a moment, both of them elated by tasting real food for the first time in ages. But Suki soon lifted her gaze towards him, thinking again about what she had come to suspect in the restroom. She gulped down a mouthful of noodles, watching as Zuko ate his. Should she share her concerns with him? They were a couple, that was the natural thing to do, wasn't it?
She had to gather her courage, then. It would be better if they faced this together.
"Uh, Zuko?" Suki whispered shyly, glancing up at him as he attempted to eat his noodles as carefully as possible. His eyes rose to meet hers.
"Hmmm?" replied Zuko. She swallowed hard, although she had no food in her mouth at the time.
"I, uh, was wondering if..." she started. He kept quiet, looking at her with those golden eyes she loved losing herself in.
For a man who had seen the strife Zuko had, he was awfully adorable when he wanted to be. He had been quite innocent in matters of love, and Suki had been thrilled to discover that sweet side of his that he often covered up for. But there was a big difference between teaching Zuko certain practices he was unfamiliar with, and telling him he just might become a father. In the first case, she could teach him many things he had yet to learn: but she was at a loss when it came to parenthood, and Zuko probably would be too, if she was judging him correctly.
Could she steal what was left of his innocence by throwing him into an early parenthood? Granted they weren't that young, they were of marrying age by now, but their relationship wasn't as mature as it should be. Could they have a child? Were they ready for such a future?
Then again, what did she expect them to have, if not a future? Zuko had left his past life behind, and from the sound of it, he had no intentions of getting it back any time soon. Suki dreaded that her hometown would dissatisfy him, that he'd want to go home once he saw it. But what if he didn't? What if he chose to stay with her, what if he liked Kyoshi Island?
For a moment she felt lightheaded, insecure, as if she were drifting between wind currents that were battering her all at once. Could she give name to her suspicions? Should she? Wouldn't that ruin the wonderful time they'd had together? The joys of love were far more fragile than they should be. So, if just for the sake of basking in them for a little longer…
"If these are special Fire Nation noodles, maybe," she finished, smiling shyly. "They're made differently in Kyoshi Island, so I was wondering..."
"Oh, I think it's the local cook's specialty," said Zuko, raising his eyebrows as he eyed the bowl. "But there must be regional differences regarding noodle cooking, I guess, right?"
"Yeah… You guys love to spice things up a lot," said Suki, chuckling. "I used to go to this noodle restaurant in the Capital, Dong's Noodle Store…"
"Oh, I remember it," said Zuko nodding.
"He always had this super spicy bowl in his menu, I never had the guts to try it," she said, with a soft laugh.
"Of course," he said, smiling. "I wouldn't have dared either. Saying it in the Fire Nation is as good as making a death wish, but I'm not that fond of spices myself."
They laughed and carried on chatting about their favorite meals, Suki's stomach sinking with every moment gone by, through all of which she kept her suspicions to herself. She knew she'd have to tell him the truth eventually, but she had to wait for the opportune moment. And as she was, preserving Zuko's smile on his face was the most important thing.
"So… are we ready to go?" Lieutenant Jee asked, upon entering the ship's engine room.
He wasn't surprised to find the ship captain had been dozing off, bored beyond belief. A few sailors had stayed with him, and they were busy playing Pai Sho to pass the time until they had to get back to work.
"Umm, sure… do we have to go already?" the drowsy captain asked, rubbing his eyes.
"It's almost morning. We take off with dawn, remember?" said Jee.
"Well, great but I don't think we can do it this time," he replied, crossing his arms. "We have no directions right now, Lieutenant. Prince Zuko neglected to hand them over, busy with his lady friend as he was…"
"Love-struck men can be unreliable like that," said Jee, smirking.
"You like the girl, huh?" said the captain. Jee shrugged.
"What matters most is that he likes her. He's been pretty nice so far in this trip. I only hope he won't go back to being a grump if they ever have an argument… anyways, I'll go knock on his door. Maybe he'll give me the directions and we'll figure out where it is we're going already."
"Please do. But if he's sleeping then let me sleep too, alright?" said the ship captain, sighing and closing his eyes again. Jee chuckled.
"Fine, fine. As you wish," he said, taking off to Zuko's cabin with a pleased grin.
Whatever he might glimpse in that room should make for a funny anecdote, he was sure of that. Catching the Prince and his lover in the midst of their exchanges was always a blast, since his blushing face afterwards would never cease to amuse Jee or any of his comrades. Still, seeing them together also brought a sting to it: Jee missed his own girlfriend, a lady he had grown well acquainted with ever since he returned to the Capital. He had answered Zuko's call to return to sea, but he had regretted leaving her behind regardless. Watching Zuko with Suki only increased his longing for her company.
He shook his thoughts away, though, and carried on towards the Prince's cabin. He took a deep breath and knocked on the door... it surprised him when it swung open after he hit it. That was uncommon. Zuko would always keep his door properly closed at night, lest he risk having annoying crewmen poking their noses into his business. Why hadn't he done it today?
"Uh, Zuko? Prince Zuko? Is everything alright…?" Jee asked, an unpleasant feeling springing up in the pit of his stomach.
The lack of response convinced him to push the door open, and he frowned as he took in the dark room. He wasn't all that acquainted with Zuko's cabin, but in the few glimpses he'd had of it, he'd never seen it so neat and tidy. The bed was made, there were no clothes in sight: in fact, there was no sign of the Prince, let alone of the girl he'd brought with him on this trip.
Jee glanced about the cabin with utmost confusion until he glimpsed a sheet of paper on the Prince's meditation table. Well, there was one sign, if anything. But where was Zuko? Did the paper hold the answer to that question?
He picked it up and read it: his jaw dropped. What on earth had the Prince done now…?
"You think they'll be okay with this?" Suki asked, biting her lip as she gazed at Zuko, sea foam spraying them as they coursed through the cold ocean's waves. "When they find out what we've done…"
"I doubt they'll mind," he replied, smiling. "If anything, the only one they'll miss is you. They're probably going to be happy to be rid of me"
"You don't mean that," said Suki, raising her eyebrows. "I know you didn't get along all that well with your crewmen, but surely they liked you better than you think."
"Still, I've taken ten years out of their lives already, I'm not taking a day more. It's been enough," said Zuko, maneuvering with the engine to keep the small ship on course.
After much pondering, he had eventually decided that taking an emergency ship would be their best choice: his way his crew wouldn't know where he'd gone if he escaped in one, so if his father ever tried to find him, he'd be out of luck. And this way, his crew wouldn't spend too much time at the misty southern sea: they'd be free to return home and stay there without worrying about having to look after Prince Zuko anymore.
He had conveyed that last thought to his crew on the letter he had left behind for them. He hoped they wouldn't hold it against him for taking one of the emergency ships, but it was better than dragging them through the world again to no avail. This was, in Zuko's opinion, the best course of action for anyone involved in his travels. And he could spend time with Suki without worrying over who would pry into their business, too. The only thing he guessed Suki regretted was…
"You're worried because you didn't get to say goodbye, aren't you?"
Suki sighed and shrugged. Zuko smiled.
"You're too kind, you know?" he said. She looked at him with uncertainty.
"You think it's a bad thing?" she asked. He bit his lip.
"If you'd asked me ten years ago, I would have thought so. After everything I've seen, though, I'm a little more appreciative of kindness than I used to be," he said. "And to think a kind girl fell in love with me, of all people… I still don't know how that happened."
"And you'd better believe it did," she said, grinning at him. "Though, this sweet talk aside… you know how to steer this ship, right?"
"Of course I do. I'm not that unreliable at sailing," he said, chuckling. "I was at sea for ten years, remember?"
"I do, but you weren't the one leading the ship, were you?" she asked, smiling. "I'm just wondering…"
"Don't worry, Suki. We'll be fine," he promised her, stepping towards her as the small ship coursed through the waves softly. "I've learned a lot about how to do this. We'll be in Kyoshi Island in no time, for certain."
He took his seat beside her and clasped her hand in his. She smiled under his gentle gaze, and she responded to his kiss with enthusiasm at first, but she recoiled from him when she felt her stomach churning again. She broke off from Zuko almost violently, taking him by surprise.
"What's wrong?" he asked, his voice soft. She smiled and waved a hand carelessly.
"Just… feeling a little sick. I guess the noodles might have sat badly with me, but it's nothing serious, surely," she said. Zuko frowned.
"Really? We can turn back right now, find a doctor if you need one…"
"No, no. We'll find one in Kyoshi Island, if need be. I might feel better by the time we get there, even," she said, smiling. Zuko bit his lip.
"If you say so… but if you feel ill, let me know. Maybe I can help somehow, I don't know," he said. Suki smiled and caressed his cheek.
"You're too sweet. I'll make sure to call you if I need you. For now, though… all I need is a blanket. You packed one, right?"
"Yeah," he said, smiling. "It's getting colder, isn't it?"
"We're far south, it's no surprise… and we've been in the Fire Nation too long," said Suki, chuckling. "We've gotten used to the heat, don't you think?"
"I'm afraid we have," he said, and he blushed a little before saying: "Though I guess we can still warm up, if it gets too cold…"
"Oh? And what exactly are you implying, Prince Zuko?" Suki asked, smiling at him. He chuckled.
"I'm implying I'm a firebender, that's all," he said. She hummed.
"Well, here I thought you meant something a little different from that…"
He laughed and shook his head, and Suki smirked as she folded her arms over her chest. The more he gazed at her, the more beautiful she seemed. He wasn't sure what their time in Kyoshi Island would be like, but he was happy that she had wanted to be his one companion in this brand-new adventure.
… Or at least, that was what he thought until her illness kicked in fully, several hours later.
"This damn boat, it's… it's too small. It's making me sick, that's it…" she groaned, covering her mouth after having emptied the content of her stomach into the sea for the third time since they took off.
Zuko was horrorstruck, a hand on her shoulder as he went over every single choice he had made to bring them this far. He was an idiot, he knew it: he had messed up for real, and really badly, by doing this. She had been perfectly fine while they were on the larger vessel, but right now she could barely move, seasick as she was. She only clutched at his shirt, a hand on her mouth as she sat by the rim of the small ship, the unpleasant lurches of her stomach making her flinch every now and then.
"What have I done to you, Suki…?" he whispered, with a grimace. She shook her head.
"It's not your fault, you didn't…" well, come to think of it, it just might be his fault, she reasoned. If her suspicions were correct, and they probably were, the ship wasn't the reason she was so ill. It might have had a hand in making her feel as badly as she did right now, but it wasn't the actual source of the sickness…
"We should head back. Or maybe go forward until we find another island," he said, releasing her and making to check his map. "We can't be that far from Kyoshi Island, see? It's right up ahead!"
"It… it doesn't make any sense, Zuko…" she said, grimacing. "If Kyoshi Island is so close by, we should've… we should've gotten there already."
He froze and looked at her with unease. Disturbing as it was to admit it, her words made sense…
"We… we should have," Zuko acknowledged. "But maybe the current isn't as strong as we thought…?"
"Or maybe the current is stronger than we thought, but it's not taking us in the right direction, Zuko," said Suki, frowning. He shook his head.
"Impossible. We can't be off-course, that's…!" he exclaimed, looking at the charts with more attention now.
He hadn't seen any signs of the islands below Whaletail Island, so surely they weren't heading south, were they? But there was a thick mist, he realized… the air was dense around these parts. What if they were coming closer to those islands without realizing it? They had been cold, and the temperature had only decreased the more they advanced…
It was almost nighttime when he spotted the mountains drifting beside them. He cringed: they were completely off-course and he hadn't noticed it, busy as he had been looking after Suki to pay proper attention to his steering. Suki would kill him for this, once she felt up to the task.
She lay in the small available bunk, uncomfortable and displeased, and yet not to the point where she'd stop eating, despite she vomited most of it anyhow. Zuko dreaded it might be a complicated stomach illness, since he had no idea how to tend to that. Maybe he should turn the ship around, sail all the way back to Whaletail Island and fetch someone who could help…
"Suki," he whispered, caressing her cheek gently and waking her while she dozed off. "I think we really are off-course. I think…"
"We're going west again?" she asked, grimacing. He shook his head.
"I think we went south. I'll… I'll try to get us back on track, I promise," he said. "But do you want to go back to Whaletail Island so you can be healed there? Or would you rather we head to Kyoshi Island right away?"
The idea of being healed made her frown. Was there a cure for pregnancy? She guessed there might be, but that idea appalled her. Besides, even if she accepted his offer, he would bring her to a Fire Nation doctor and she certainly didn't want to see one. Not when they might confirm her pregnancy, and then rumors of Prince Zuko's bastard child would start to spread throughout the world…
"Kyoshi Island. I can take a little longer on this ship," she said, smiling weakly. Zuko sighed and nodded.
"I'll try to fix this. I promise," he whispered, kissing her brow and heading to the steering wheel again.
But despite his best intentions, and his frequent firebending to fuel the ship's small engine, he soon understood why they had drifted away as they had: just as Suki had told him, the currents were dragging them away. The ship was far too small to fight against them, it wasn't meant for long journeys. And truly, he hadn't planned for it to be a long one: Kyoshi Island was right next to Whaletail Island. A small ship should've made it there easily, but surely he had misread the map somehow. The currents had done their work afterwards, ferrying them off southwards. He had struggled to steer the ship through the night, only realizing his hard work was to no avail by morning. Surely there was a way to fight against the currents, but he was exhausted, he could barely firebend anymore, and he couldn't figure out a solution right now.
All he could do was drift at sea with Suki, hoping their food would last until they reached populated lands again.
They were adrift for three days amid mountains and small islands. There was only mist around them by the time the currents stopped acting so powerfully upon the ship. They weren't in the best of moods, shivering cold under the south's relentless weather, but they found a little comfort in being together, despite the hardships…
"I'm pretty sure that there are some other islands to the east" said Suki, grimacing as her stomach pained her "Once we get there, we should be able to course those currents northwards. Should be, I think…"
"Did you ever sail down these parts?" Zuko asked. Suki shook her head.
"We barely ever left our island for anything but fishing. But I remember that my sponsor talked about the currents before, with the ship captain who took us to the Fire Nation. He said they were hard to course with small ships, and that the safer way to reach Kyoshi Island was by accessing it through the east."
"He might be right…" Zuko sighed, rubbing his eyes with the heel of his hands. "But we can't go there yet. I think we need to replenish our supplies."
"Okay, but how? Where? We're drifting through uninhabited islands, aren't we?" Suki asked. Zuko shook his head.
"Not anymore, we're not. We're in calm waters now," he said, gritting his teeth. "Calm, southern waters."
"What do you mean, Zuko?" she asked, frowning.
He stood up from the cabin's floor and gazed through the window. Suki joined him soon, and she gasped when she spotted the tall spikes of ice peeking through the water further ahead.
"We're… we're in the South Pole?!" she asked, aghast. He shook his head.
"These are just icebergs so far," he said, moving to the steering wheel. "But we will be there soon."
"Wait, but what do you mean?! We're going to replenish our supplies there?" she asked, astonished. Zuko nodded.
"There's a Fire Nation settlement there," he explained, surprising her. "We'll stop by, the soldiers can assist us, and after that…"
"Are you sure of that, Zuko?" she asked, her eyes widening. "Would soldiers want to help us? I thought you were…"
"Banished? I guess, but that doesn't mean I'm considered a legitimate traitor to the crown. They might not try to harm us, they might actually help us instead," said Zuko. "Don't worry, Suki. We'll figure this out."
"I hope so," she said, grimacing and taking his hand in hers. He smiled gently at her as she cringed at the pain and ran to the rim of the ship quickly, emptying her stomach once again, to Zuko's concern. Hopefully there would be a physician in the settlement, too.
The icy shore was still a few ways away, and Suki braced herself against the cold breeze as she waited for Zuko to steer their ship in the right direction, or at least what he thought would be the right direction. To her relief, though, he was able to shift the ship effectively, unlike how it had been when the currents took hold of them. Suki wasn't sure whether she wanted Zuko to find that settlement or not: wasn't it risky for him to be seen by soldiers? Wasn't he as good as a fugitive, to some degree? Wouldn't these men want to capture him? She had the suspicion they might.
Regardless of what might await them, Suki had a bad feeling about this unexpected turn for their excursion. Their detour could cost them dearly, or at least that was what she had dreaded upon arriving in the South Pole, for some reason. It wasn't a bad place – at least, it shouldn't be –, but she couldn't stop feeling uneasy. Something was wrong.
"There. I can see it," Zuko said. Suki's sense of dread increased.
"Are you sure we should do this, Zuko?" she whispered. He nodded.
"I think you could use less swaying on a boat and more stability. It might help you feel better," he said, as he steered his ship to a halt in the port the Fire Nation soldiers had built years ago.
Worried as he was about Suki, he didn't think much of the fact that there were no ships docked nearby; he didn't really care. All he wanted was to lead the woman he loved into the ice, to help her out of the unstable ship. Suki seemed reticent to climb off the ship, but she allowed him to take her hand and lead her to the frozen plains that spread out before them.
Again, her stomach's irritability increased when she had her feet firmly planted on the ground, as it had happened when they had arrived in Whaletail Island: she cringed and covered her mouth. Zuko clasped her shoulders with his own hands, frowning.
"Suki, listen… we're right there. It's barely a walk away. We'll get there, we'll stop to rest, and we'll be on our way home in no time, I promise. Just try to relax…"
"I-it's cold, and I feel so…" she muttered, grimacing. Zuko bit his lip before conjuring a plum of fire.
"Come here," he said, surrounding her shoulders and holding the small plum near her. "We'll be there in a moment. Things will get better, for sure. I mean it, Suki."
"Right… right," she whispered, nodding.
Going by her track record, though, as soon as she got used to a certain routine, as soon as she adjusted to a new life, something awful would happen to take her out of her element and set her life upside down again. She didn't look forward to seeing that happen again, and she had no doubts her sense of foreboding surely came from her dread that this sequence of events would repeat itself if they kept walking.
But she said nothing, and they didn't stop: the looming shape of the metallic settlement loomed menacing and large as they came closer. Even Zuko was infected by Suki's unease now, as he finally noticed of how still and quiet everything was. The Fire Nation had very organized troops, but they weren't stealthy enough to be this silent. He frowned, wondering if something had changed. The settlement appeared firm and steady, but perhaps the number of soldiers guarding it had been cut, in order to send them to other military operations that direly needed larger numbers.
That didn't explain why there wasn't anyone keeping watch in the settlement's walls, though. Even if there were only a handful of soldiers left, at least one of them should be pacing the Fire Nation's encampment. But there was no one, nothing as far as Zuko could see. Why?
"Zuko…" said Suki, grimacing as they stopped at the gates. He clenched his teeth.
"Something's weird," he acknowledged at last. "But… but we'd better get to safety first. We can figure out what happened later."
Suki grimaced but nodded, and Zuko helped her through the walls, and soon afterwards through the doors that led inside the settlement's only building. They paced the empty hallways with uncertainty, expecting something, anything, to pop out of nowhere and give them a fright, but nothing did.
"I don't know what's going on, but I think we can stay here…" said Zuko, helping Suki into a room with a large table and seats. She clutched at a chair and dropped on it, sighing in relief.
"I don't either, but I… I feel too sick to move anymore," she said, grimacing. Zuko looked at her worriedly.
"Has this ever happened to you before?" he asked. She shook her head. "Well, stomachaches can be dealt with. I had quite a few in the past, and my uncle always would brew this special tea for me…"
"I, uh… don't think tea will be enough to cure me," said Suki. Zuko shrugged.
"It could help, you never know. But yeah, maybe it won't cure you that easily…" he said, sighing. "Still, this place looks… well, empty."
"I fear it is," said Suki, biting her lip. "I don't think we'll find a physician here."
Zuko grimaced, lowering his head in agreement.
"No, we won't. But maybe there's food stacked somewhere, I don't know," he said. "It could help us make the trip back to Whaletail, or directly to Kyoshi, if we can."
"Wherever we go next will be better than here. Zuko, I… I have a bad feeling about this place," she said. Zuko frowned.
"I'm confused by what's going on too, but nothing bad has to happen. We'll be okay, we'll just wait here and take off again when you're feeling better…"
"I don't think I'll feel better anytime soon, Zuko. You see…" she said, avoiding his gaze. Zuko frowned and knelt before her, forcing her to look at him.
"What's going on, Suki?" he asked. She breathed deeply.
"J-just… promise you won't panic when I say this, okay? I know it'll sound like madness, but it's as weird for me as it will be for you, if not more, so…"
"So?" said Zuko, raising his eyebrows "Can you say it already?"
She breathed out slowly, biting her lower lip. She had to do it. She had better do it now. Keeping her suspicions to herself wasn't going to help anyone, so she might as well put it out there, for once and for all.
"You see…"
A loud metallic noise prompted her to shut up.
Zuko frowned and got back on his feet, immediately on edge after the foreboding noise had reached him. He jumped to the open door of their room and glanced outside, his brow heavily furrowed: he could see the shadows of people out by the building's doors. People. Maybe it was the soldiers…
"You sure they came here?" he heard one of them ask.
"They had to! They couldn't have gone anywhere else."
"Well, they're not going anywhere else for now, for sure. Especially if they're Fire Nation."
The voices made Zuko's stomach sink. Whoever was out there wasn't an army member, and from the sound of it, they weren't going to show mercy to anyone who was Fire Nation. Were they responsible for the apparent abandonment of the settlement? Was this situation their doing?
It probably was. It wouldn't surprise Zuko in the slightest to discover as much. He tensed up even more as he reasoned that the men outside weren't going to be friendly, and they wouldn't be inclined to find a cure for Suki, or to help them restock for their journey to Kyoshi Island.
Because if they were here, and they were open enemies of the Fire Nation, there was only one thing they could be, and if Zuko's suspicions were correct, this could not bode well for him and Suki. If his relationship with Sokka was any indication, he could only suspect he wouldn't get along too well with his fellow Southern Water Tribesmen…