Gladiator

by Seyary-Minamoto

In a world where the Avatar wasn't found, the Fire Nation took over two nations and they strive to overcome the last one. Water Tribe warrior Sokka seeks to fight for his people's rights, but he's captured by his enemies. His life is no longer in his hands as he fights as a Gladiator, and his fate will eventually depend on the Fire Nation Princess, who needs him for her own ends...

129. Chapter 129: Appeasing Azula 1

His face contorted with displeasure, with chagrin. The next chance would be it, he would get it right, he would defeat his enemies. This wasn't the end, it couldn't be, regardless of how the others had played their hands much better than he had so far. His strategy wasn't that bad, he could do this…

And then, there it was: a golden chance, gifted to him by the one who could have been his undoing.

"Mahjong! Ha! I win!" Sokka exclaimed, proudly, as he took the tile Tai Wei had just discarded.

Fei Li and Taro looked at him in surprise as he declared his victory, while Tai Wei's hand shook, his finger hovering where the tile had been. He finally lowered his head in shameful defeat.

"Oh, not again! You just won the previous round!" Fei Li groaned, pouting. "And I had a good hand this time, too…"

"Mahjong is a game of strategy, Fei Li," said Sokka, smirking proudly. "When you notice a certain tile hasn't been discarded, you probably shouldn't let it go so easily, if just to avoid giving your opponent exactly what he's looking for…"

"A lesson hard learned, but I'll keep it in mind," said Tai Wei, nodding. "You shuffle again, Taro?"

"He shouldn't, I'm better at shuffling!" said Fei Li, as the older guard took upon the duty of flipping the tiles again for their next distribution.

Mahjong was a frequent distraction for bored sailors, so naturally, Azula's Barge had a set of the game tucked away safely in one of the storages. Fei Li had found it by chance, and he had been thrilled to rally up three more people to play with. Sokka had been in the dining deck of the ship, enjoying his breakfast, when Fei Li came rushing in, asking for willing opponents to play the game. Sokka offered himself when others refused to: they were avoiding Fei Li's known tendency of taking games too seriously and souring the pleasant mood for everyone. Thus, only the least competitive guards, Tai Wei and Taro, had joined in, and Sokka became the fourth member of the game, mainly out of curiosity.

They had explained the rules to him as they played, expecting a beginner to be too unexperienced to pose a real threat, but Sokka had gotten the hang of the game in a matter of five rounds. His strategies were hard for the others to predict as he remained adaptable, hoping to keep his gameplay efficient, most of all. The three Royal Guards were certainly astounded by his ability to analyze the game so thoroughly in such a short time.

The Princess was, as ever, pleased to watch her gladiator overcoming impossible odds, even when it came to something as simple as a mahjong game. As she stood by the rim of the deck, watching them play a few feet away, she could only sigh in bliss and appreciate the sight before her. He was recovering well, as he often did. He had enough energies to sit there, under the morning sun, playing games and keeping his mind sharp to achieve success. It was a relief that he would be so similar to his usual self, but she knew he still struggled when moving. He was prone to seeing dark spots dancing in his vision, to suffer from vertigo, to feel his body weakened even though he was scarcely putting it through any strain. The symptoms had decreased with every new day spent traveling, but they didn't vanish completely. Even if they had, Azula wouldn't have dropped her guard.

She eyed him as he played Mahjong excitedly, appreciating the color his skin had regained. He still didn't dare move too much, and sometimes he made that expression of displeasure over the pain stinging his abdomen, but all evidence suggested he was recovering. He was. She just needed to hold on to that.

"We're arriving ahead of schedule," Rui Shi commented, resting on the railing beside her. Azula nodded, as she watched the Great Gates of Azulon shrink behind them. They were almost home by now.

"I noticed," she said, nodding. "It's better this way. I suspect his recovery rate may improve once he's home instead of on a rocking ship."

"He's already a lot better," said Rui Shi. "Not completely better yet, but…"

"But I won't risk him hiking all the way to his house as he always does after these trips," Azula said. Rui Shi raised an eyebrow.

"Will you take him home?" he asked. Azula gritted her teeth but shook her head.

"I don't think I should," she muttered. "I'd want to, but… I think I can't afford it. My father will need to hear of what happened, and if he finds out I was too busy looking after Sokka to report to him…"

"Things could grow complicated," Rui Shi acknowledged. Azula nodded.

"I need Sokka home safely, there's no doubt about it, but I have to deal with my father too. He… he's supposed to be my top priority," Azula said, with a dry grin and a shrug. "I can't give him any reasons to think otherwise, or else, as you said, things could get complicated. Really complicated. So…"

"What's your plan?" Rui Shi asked. She looked at him somewhat apprehensively.

"I trust you," she said. Rui Shi froze, his pale cheeks suddenly tinged with color. As his helmet was removed during the journey, just as the other guards', his expression was in plain sight for the Princess. "And that's the reason why I'm going to do something I didn't think I ever would. But if I want to be sure Sokka is safely home, even if I'm not there directly, well… there's a way to do it."

"You mean…?"

"I want you to take Xin Long, lead him to Sokka's house, and I want you to keep Sokka safe, so he makes it through the flight without a hitch," said Azula. "Once Song is tending to him, you'll be free to leave. But until then, you're… you're to watch over him and make sure he's alright."

"Princess… d-did you just…?" he asked, his voice trembling. Azula eyed him with uncertainty. "I… I don't think I can do this. I'm not someone who can… I really just…!"

"Captain, this is not a request. This is an order. As usual," she said, frowning. "As much as you may not like handling my unreasonable demands, I need you to do this. You might hold me in such high esteem that you'd never fly on my dragon, let alone without me on the saddle too, but I hold you in such high esteem that I'm extending you this honor. You get to be Xin Long's temporary rider."

Rui Shi opened his mouth and closed it repeatedly, lowering his gaze nervously. Azula sighed as she watched him fidget.

"Are you going to refuse again, Captain?" she asked. "Because if you won't do it, I'll just ask someone else…"

"Fine, fine, I… I can do it," he said, swallowing hard. "Only, what about you? Will you need the palanquin?"

"No, once Xin Long has dropped off the two of you, he'll come back to fetch me," said Azula. "Simple and straightforward enough."

"Then… you're only deciding not to take Sokka home yourself to keep up appearances?" Rui Shi asked. Azula sighed. "If it's the case, I understand, but… won't it still be suspicious if people see your dragon flying back and forth?"

"It's not entirely about what they see, it's about how little willpower I'd have if I were with him at his house," she said. "I'd fail to take off again until I know for sure that he's fine, and, well, who knows how long it would take for me to leave at all. So, I'm conceding this task to you."

"I… I understand, I think," said Rui Shi, frowning a little. "Very well, then, Princess. It shall be done."

"Thank you," she said, sighing and shifting away from the railing. "But if we're going to do this, you two should probably take off now."

"It's a good thing Tai Wei helped him bring his luggage on deck earlier," said Rui Shi. As they had known they'd arrive today, Tai Wei had already given Sokka a hand so he wouldn't have to struggle with fetching his bags once the Barge docked in the harbor.

The Captain and Princes turned to study Sokka as he twitched before the Mahjong game, waiting for the right tile to create the appropriate combination. After a moment, Azula approached and stood behind Sokka, eyeing his tiles with curiosity. His eyebrow twitched as he glanced up at her, guessing she was assessing his playing decisions.

"You're collecting the wrong tiles," she said. Sokka grimaced.

"Of course not!" he retorted.

"Your chances to get all four of those aren't so good," she said, with a smirk.

The others leapt upon hearing that. They smirked too while Sokka looked at Azula in chagrin, for she had revealed Sokka had been after the rarest tiles…

… Only, she hadn't. Before four rounds, Sokka had collected all the perfectly common tiles he needed for another Mahjong, and he was cheering while Azula laughed at the dumbfounded expressions on her guards' faces.

"That was a bluff?! A bluff?!" Fei Li exclaimed, horrified. "Princess, that's not fair!"

"Now, you're listening to what an outsider to the game says. Joke's on you for not considering that I might have been messing with your game rather than his," she said, shrugging. Sokka smiled proudly at her.

"If we'd been betting here, I'd have cleaned them out of all their money, hehe," he said. Azula smiled back.

"Good for you, but I'm afraid that your triumphant streak ends now," she said. Sokka's smile waned.

"Eh? It does? How come?" he asked.

"Xin Long's taking you home, Rui Shi will see to it that you arrive safely. This way you won't have to walk, or take a carriage through bumpy roads," she explained. Sokka pouted but shrugged.

"Well, fair enough," he said. "But these guys need another player… you should join them if I'm taking off with Rui Shi."

"Ah, should I, now?" Azula asked, smirking at her guards. "We'll see about that."

Sokka chuckled as he pushed himself up. Azula almost moved in to help him, but Rui Shi lunged forward first, extending his hand for Sokka to take it. He eyed Azula almost remorsefully, but she nodded in gratefulness. Too often she needed to keep her instinctive protectiveness towards Sokka in check, and Rui Shi seemed to have known how to recognize those occasions better than Azula herself.

Xin Long had been lounging on the ship's prow, lying upside down, when Azula, Rui Shi and Sokka approached. He was aware of what they needed from him, and he rolled over immediately. Azula smiled a little at his leisurely behavior, though.

"As ever, entertained by the clouds," she commented. "Alright, you three, get going. Be quick, but be… gentle, alright, Xin Long?"

Xin Long shook his head proudly, as though refusing to do so. Azula narrowed her gaze and the dragon chuckled softly. She smirked and caressed his hair gently.

"Troublemaker," she whispered to the proud dragon.

Rui Shi lifted Sokka's bags onto the saddle, and then he waited until Sokka had settled on the back seat before climbing onto the front one. The idea of riding the Princess's dragon filled him with a strange mix of euphoria and foreboding. He swallowed hard and breathed slowly, while Azula looked at Sokka with worried and tender eyes.

"Tell Song what happened, she might know just how to treat your injury," she said. "Don't go overboard with anything you do, don't even think about starting to train yet. Get rest, eat…"

"I'll do all those things, don't fret," said Sokka, with an encouraging smile. "And you… go beat those guys at Mahjong. They're actually pretty fun to defeat, heh."

"Of course they are," said Azula, with a smirk. "Take care, then. I'll drop by to see you when I have a chance."

"I'll look forward to it," he said, smiling too. Rui Shi nodded at Azula and she returned the gesture.

Xin Long took off easily, and he picked up speed as subtly as possible. Azula watched him go, having known her dragon wouldn't want to displease her when the situation was as serious and delicate as it was. Even though Xin Long always wanted to mess with Rui Shi and Sokka, he knew better than to do it this time around. The Captain held the reins awkwardly, but he didn't use them at all as the dragon progressed through the sky, headed towards Sokka's home expertly. All the while, the gladiator glanced over his shoulder, watching his Princess shrink on the ship while feeling that their roles were unfairly reversed this time around.

"Turtle shouldn't fly while the hawk stays down below…" he muttered. Rui Shi frowned.

"You said something?"

"N-no, never mind," said Sokka, with a weak smile.

Azula's lingered on the dragon's figure as it sped into the distance. She could still glimpse it in the horizon, but most of all, she could sense what her dragon was telling her through their bond. As long as Xin Long was with them, she had nothing to fear: Sokka would be safe. Nothing bad would happen to him, nothing could…

"Say, uh, Princess?" Fei Li called her. Azula frowned and turned.

"Yes?" she said, looking at them as Taro shuffled the tiles again.

"Were you going to play with us?" he asked, smiling innocently.

"Play?" Azula repeated. "Oh, I don't intend to play with you: I intend to crush you."

A slow smirk spread over her face as her three guards welcomed her arrogant remark with amusement and some wariness. She took her seat where Sokka had been before, readying herself to play a few rounds, if just to keep herself from worrying over Sokka's journey home.

---

The last month had been rather leisurely for Song. She had acquired many books from the Capital's best bookstores, and she was proud of having finished filling the first bookshelf in the house. She had yet to read every book, but she had made good progress with most of them by now.

Life without Sokka, the Princess or Rui Shi would often be boring for her. She had nobody to talk to, although she seldom talked thoroughly with Azula, and her relationship with Rui Shi had grown strained in the past few months, too. Nevertheless, she felt lonely… though loneliness of this kind wasn't quite as bad as the one she had experienced when she had just been forced into slavery. Being surrounded by people at all times, but knowing she was alone, knowing that nobody could help her, had been the most hopeless situation she had ever endured. This was a breeze in comparison.

Hawky had returned with a letter from her mother just a few days before, though, and Song offered the bird a chance to rest before sending him out again. She did talk to him, despite the creature couldn't talk back, and she enjoyed stroking his feathers while reading one of her new books.

Hawky was comfortable on his perch, though, when the familiar thump of Xin Long's landing reached Song's ears. She jumped from the couch, setting down the book and smiling in amazement: she had no idea they'd be home today.

"Sokka?" she called, moving towards the backyard, where the large dragon was currently resting at.

But to her surprise and confusion, the dragon's rider was not Azula. Rui Shi climbed off the saddle first, and while Song would have been apprehensive over seeing him, all her reservations went forgotten when she realized Rui Shi was aiding Sokka in climbing off Xin Long's back: Sokka's face was contorted with pain.

"Sokka?" she repeated, her voice ringing with concern now.

Both the new arrivals looked at Song with uncertainty, as Rui Shi kept Sokka standing up, with a firm hand on the gladiator's back. Sokka smiled awkwardly, perhaps somewhat guiltily.

"Hey, Song," he whispered. "I'm home."

"You're…?" she repeated, looking at him with disbelief before she grimaced and asked the question she always found herself asking him. "What on earth happened to you now?"

Sokka let out a laugh, as Rui Shi helped him inside the house. Song moved to Sokka's free side, aiding him too. The gladiator's eyes lit up when he spotted Hawky on his perch.

"Heeey, it's my favorite bird! Hi, Hawky!" he said, beaming, and Hawky squeaked back. The pair helping Sokka didn't react to his exchange with the hawk, though.

"Considering his situation, he probably needs some food," Rui Shi said. Song glanced at him in confusion.

"What do you mean, exactly?" she asked.

"Oh, that's because… I lost a lot of blood," Sokka answered, grimacing. "I have felt better lately, it's true, but I need some, uh, blood-recovery diet, if you know of something like that"

"Well, I do know some things," said Song, biting her lip as they led Sokka to the kitchen. "Yes, I could arrange a diet like that, but what on earth brought this on, Sokka…?"

"Oh, it's a very long story," he said, as he finally reached a chair. He settled on it and sighed. "Damn, I feel like I'm ninety years-old…"

"We came across a lot of trouble in the Earth Kingdom," said Rui Shi, stepping away and towards the kitchen door again. "More than we bargained for."

"Wait, where are you going?" Song asked. Rui Shi froze, pointing at the door they'd just come in through.

"Just… to make sure the dragon takes off," he explained. Song blushed a little. "I'll be back here shortly."

"U-uh. Oh. That's okay then, sorry about that," she said, with a weak grin before turning to Sokka while Rui Shi moved to the backyard. "Okay, so, what sort of trouble did you find this time, then?"

"Umm, the White Lotus, in short?" Sokka said, as Song started gathering the ingredients to make a decent meal for Sokka. Her eyes widened as she turned to look at him, holding a bowl in her hands.

"The White Lotus?" she repeated. "You mean, the same people who attacked the Capital when the Princess was sick and…?"

"Yeah. They wanted to avenge their captured brethren, or something of the sort," said Sokka, huffing. "And they wanted to find out if I was going to join them, which of course I wouldn't do… but I guess I should start from the beginning, shouldn't I?"

It took some time for Sokka to finish retelling the story, and when Rui Shi returned he interjected on occasion to clarify any details Sokka had forgotten. Song worked hard and diligently in the kitchen, making meals for the two of them. By the time she had set down the plates before the two men, the story was as good as finished.

"So… all this because you wouldn't be their pawn in a plot you knew nothing about?" Song asked, confused, as they ate. "Because you wouldn't manipulate the Princess into being someone else?"

"Well, not deliberately," said Rui Shi. Sokka pouted. "You've changed her in many ways, there's no denying that. Only, they expected you to do that by plotting to do so. I suppose they wanted you to turn her against her father…"

"Heh, tough luck. Like she would ever turn against him," said Sokka, raising his eyebrows. "The harm caused by the Fire Lords can't be undone easily, but they're generally revered in the Fire Nation, aren't they?"

"Uh, yeah, so far," said Rui Shi, nodding.

"Who would have a better shot for the throne, a Princess who defies her father or a Princess who's completely faithful to him?" Sokka inquired. "Who would support her if she defied him openly, for starters?"

"I suppose only the slaves," said Song. "But they wouldn't be able to show their support to begin with. She'd be fighting on her own, if she ever tried to oppose him."

"Indeed, she would be, because the White Lotus are dead certain she's unforgivable," said Sokka. "So, even if she did what they don't have the guts to do, and rebelled openly against Ozai, they'd never back her up. If this is how they plan on to going about taking down the Fire Lord, they're doing a mighty fine job of it. Their best plans so far have been attempts to kill princes or kidnap princesses, and yet they're so sure they're not part of the problem…"

"And they thought killing you would help, I mean… how awful could they be?" Song asked, grimacing and shaking her head. Sokka sighed.

"I want to believe it's just Jeong Jeong's faction, though," he said. "He implied he didn't agree with the operation in the Capital, after all. Piandao wouldn't have agreed with taking me down, even Jeong Jeong wanted it… there's disruption, disagreements, in their group. They're not of one mind, and I'm not surprised that's the case. From the looks of it, everyone who hates the Fire Nation and who managed to elude slavery, has joined the White Lotus, so… they've likely lost all sight of what their group's real objective is."

"You may be giving them too much credit," said Rui Shi. Sokka shrugged.

"I'd rather think they're not worse than the Fire Nation, to a fault," said Sokka. "I'd like to think that it's just pain that has driven them to these extremes, and that they will rethink what they're doing eventually…"

"Isn't it the same as hoping the Fire Lord will see the error in his ways?" Song asked, raising an eyebrow with uncertainty. Sokka shrugged.

"Hey, if he did it'd be better than if he keeps going as he has so far, right?" he said. "Imagine if Ozai gave up the war because he realized it's pointless. It wouldn't fix all he wrecked, but at least he wouldn't destroy anything else, right?"

"I guess, but… it's wishful," said Song, shrugging. Sokka smiled as he set down his chopsticks, the plate empty before him.

"A lot of things are. Doesn't mean they're outright impossible," he said, stretching and sighing. "Anyways, I'm getting tired. Guess all those Mahjong games did take a toll on me, huh?"

"I'll help you upstairs," said Rui Shi, bolting to his feet. Sokka smiled gratefully.

Song sighed and busied herself with cleaning the dishes, worrisome thoughts coursing her mind. The White Lotus had been in the Fire Nation before, who was to say they wouldn't stage another attempt on Sokka's life while he was here? Could they assume he'd be safe just because he was in the Capital? She doubted it.

Maybe she would ask Rui Shi if Sokka ought to have guards assigned to him until he was feeling better… though the idea of talking to him by herself worried her. They still had a lot to address, although, in the face of recent events, she felt foolish for worrying about that right now. Sokka's life could be in danger and she was still twiddling her thumbs about having kissed Rui Shi for the wrong reasons…

Once she heard footsteps headed downstairs, Song dropped the rag with which she had been drying some plates. She turned around just as Rui Shi stood at the kitchen threshold, glancing at her from the corner of his eyes.

"He's settled in bed now. He may stop saying as many controversial things once he's rested," he said. Song smiled and shook her head.

"It's Sokka, he'll be controversial either way. That has nothing to do with how well he's rested," she said, swallowing hard after she finished talking. "I'm sorry things were so hard in your journey, though. Truly, I can't begin to imagine how horrifying it must have been to be in your place…"

"Yes, well..." said Rui Shi, with a grimace. "Nobody thought it would come to that. I honestly… I really thought we'd make it through without trouble. Things were far more complicated than they should have been."

"It sounds like you three did everything you could, though. That Deserter, he planned everything at length…" said Song.

"I guess he did," Rui Shi said. "It's safe to say we have never come across a worse foe. The White Lotus is certainly something to beware."

Song looked at him remorsefully. Rui Shi gritted his teeth.

"When… when it happened, I was left to just fight off my paralysis while the Princess did her damnedest to reach Sokka. I don't know if I took a worse blow from the shirshu, or if it was just her willpower, but she got to him before I could do anything to follow. And when I was finally able to get there, she had already…"

"Cauterized his wounds," Song finished.

"I had never seen such desperation in her face, though," said Rui Shi. "I… I can't forget it. I can't forget how fragile she was that night. I never thought I'd see her like that,"

Song swallowed hard. She knew Rui Shi cared about Azula, and she wasn't surprised he was so afflicted by the traumatic experience. But something told her he wasn't recounting this merely to vent about his sorrows. She bit her lip as he fell silent, wondering if he'd say something more…

"She has always been so strong, and yet the thought of losing him demolished every last one of her walls and rendered her defenseless," Rui Shi finally continued. "She couldn't help but cry. She could barely sleep afterwards, even when we knew he was stable. And nowadays, even though she's trying to keep up appearances, there's still a glint of that fear in her eyes, the same fear from that night. What she went through… it may as well have broken her."

"It's so horrible," said Song, shaking her head. Rui Shi sighed, dropping his head against the wall.

"For all this time, I kept treating them as one would treat foolish teenagers with a reckless relationship. Maybe they behaved like it, so… I thought it was warranted, pretty much," he said. "I grew to understand them better after that journey, but… I never expected to be so heartbroken by extension because of Sokka's fate. Before I knew it, I was hoping he'd be fine, not only because I was worried about him, but because… because she wouldn't have been able to recover otherwise. If anything worse had happened, she would've… I don't even want to imagine what she would have done."

Song lowered her gaze. Despite her uncertainties, she stepped towards Rui Shi, hoping to offer a little more consolation than her silence, if just by standing closer to him. He swallowed hard.

"I underestimated their bond, no doubt. I underestimated how much love really matters. I thought… I really thought they could have made a choice, they could have held back, they could have spared us the concerns about the future. But after that, I… I can't even begrudge them for surrendering to their feelings anymore. His life really is constantly at risk, and… well, I'd thought losing the one you love was the worst possible thing, but losing them without having been able to love them properly…? I guess… I guess that would have been much worse, wouldn't it?"

"Actually, yes," said Song, smiling a little. "I'd think so, anyways. Though I'd rather she never loses him at all, but still…"

"Yet, if it were to happen… it would still be better if she doesn't spend the rest of her life wondering what might have been," said Rui Shi. "Truth be told, when situations like these happen, you… you rethink your priorities entirely. You realize things that used to be so important maybe really aren't as essential as you thought. We didn't even disguise their relationship in the village we found help in, and it wasn't until a while later that I realized that we had forgotten to do so. It was clear, though, that the Princess barely cared anymore if others knew about their relationship, not when she was crying at the sight of his blood on her hands. His very life was at stake, and everything else became secondary. Everything else could be dealt with later. But he couldn't disappear. If he did, then all those secondary things would grow even more meaningless…"

"Of course," said Song, sighing.

"It's safe to say, witnessing this opened my eyes to many things," Rui Shi whispered. "Not only regarding their relationship, but… ours."

Song froze. So that was where he was taking this conversation after all.

"U-uh, Rui Shi, before you say anything, I should probably explain…"

"You were ashamed of having kissed me for the wrong reasons," Rui Shi said. She blushed, staring at him with wide eyes. "That's… what the Princess figured, anyways."

"Wait, you… you told her?" she asked. Rui Shi smiled weakly and shrugged.

"It came up. I just… figured you had been covering for them that night," he said. Song lowered her gaze, bashful and ashamed.

"I'm so sorry. I really am, I just…" she said, gritting her teeth and closing her eyes. Rui Shi smiled.

"You don't owe me any explanations," he said, surprising her. "I enjoyed kissing you, really, for whatever reason it was. Your reluctance to see me, though, and how often you avoided me… that was what worried me."

"I'm sorry for that, too," she said. "I just… didn't think I should have done what I did, and I somehow punished myself for it that way…"

"Huh. Well, Song…" he said, turning so he would face her directly. "I understand if you're reluctant. I won't force anything on you that you won't want. The only question I want answered, though, is… if you are interested in me in this way at all. If you say you aren't, it's the last you'll hear of this matter. I won't bother you anymore with it, and we may remain as friends, as we used to be…"

"But…" said Song, looking at him in confusion.

"Truthfully, I just want you to be happy," he said, with a weak smile. "If you're not sure you'll find your happiness with me, I will relent without a problem. I promise."

"But wait, I don't think that's…" she said, looking at him with uncertainty. "Rui Shi, I… I don't know what to say. I mean, I wronged you, I misled you, I…"

"You did all those things, but honestly?" said Rui Shi. "After seeing firsthand what it means to lose the one you love, I have trouble finding your apparent crimes as harmful as you do. You did what you thought you had to, and there's nothing wrong with that. Like I said, it was your evading of me that worried me more, but…"

"I shouldn't have done that either, I'm so sorry…" she said, covering her face with her hands. To her surprise, Rui Shi took them in his own, so he could continue to look upon her.

"If it's forgiveness you want, you can have it," he said. "Frankly, I don't think you acted all that harmfully in the first place. All I really want to know, Song… as I said, all ask for is an answer. If you want to be with me, then…"

"Then what?" she asked, swallowing hard. "What would… happen with us?"

"Well, I… I'd certainly be very happy," said Rui Shi, with a shy smile. "We could do whatever you'd like. As for me, I will have all I need just by knowing that you liked me at all…"

"I… I do," she said. Rui Shi's eyes widened this time. "I like you a lot, actually. I… oh, spirits, I can't believe I'm saying it, but… I am, huh? Oh dear…"

Rui Shi's smile grew more sincere. She bit her lip and smiled bashfully at him, her cheeks flushed.

"If you're not ready for a relationship, that's fine too," he said. "I know I come with baggage, and trouble. I am a Captain of the Royal Guards, after all… I'm far from the best catch."

"You don't know what you're talking about," said Song, with a weak grin. Rui Shi blushed. "You're… oh, I don't know if I'm ready for a relationship, but if I am, I… I'd want it to be with you, for sure. It's just… are you sure about this? About… me? A common slave who, well… lied to you? Avoided you? Hurt you…?"

Rui Shi smiled and moved a hand to caress her hair. Song gazed into his eyes, barely noticing how close they were to each other.

"After all this time, Song, after all this distance, after everything I've seen and lived through, I've come to understand that our decisions define us. And I have decided that you matter more to me than whatever mistakes you might have made. We can work our way out of that obstacle, if we both want to. Truth is, I like you more than I've ever liked anyone else… and after what happened with those two, I've understood how fragile life really is. I understood that experiencing love, genuine, wholehearted love, is not only worth the risks and hard work, but heh, it also can save your life when you least expect it."

"Maybe," she whispered, biting her lip. "But… I don't know if I'm good enough for you."

"I know you're better than good enough," he said, smiling. "I guess I need to help you see it, too."

"Oh, Rui Shi…" she said, with a smile and a blush of her own. "Are you sure, then? You… you choose me?"

"I do," he whispered. "Though I'm not the only one who has to make a decision. As I said, if you'd rather not do this, I'll never bother you with this again. I promise I'm not going to…"

His words were cut off when she surrounded him in a tight embrace. His own face flushed now, as he slowly embraced her, too.

"I'm so sorry, Rui Shi. F-for wasting time, for hurting you, for…"

"It's of no matter," he said, smiling. "You don't have to feel bad about it, Song…"

"I… I do want this," she said, looking up at him. "It's not even a question, I do…"

"But…?" Rui Shi asked, Song smiled awkwardly.

"But what?"

"Uh, I just… thought you were going to give me a reason not to go for it," he said, smiling a little. "You weren't?"

"A reason not to be together?" she whispered. "We already know all the reasons. Why would I need to repeat them? Why, when we've… when we've established the risks are worth it?"

Rui Shi's smile widened, and Song giggled as he pressed his forehead to hers. It took another awkward moment of hesitation until Rui Shi finally dared kiss her. Song's heart drummed in her chest, her hands trembling on his chest.

They gazed at each other once the kiss ended, and their smiles couldn't have been brighter. It seemed to Rui Shi that he would be staying at this house for a little longer than he had originally envisioned, for Song took his hand and led him to sit at the couch with her: they still had many more things to talk about.

---

Ozai's brow had seldom been as furrowed. Zhao had paced through the room as the conversation flowed, but by now he had taken his seat by the vacant chair before Ozai's desk, a hand covering his mouth as his brown eyes glowed with outrage. Azula occupied the other seat, and she breathed out slowly once she was finished recounting her tale.

She had arrived as quickly as she could in the Palace, hoping no rumors of Xin Long's strange flight pattern would reach Ozai before she did. Her father had not been as overjoyed as he usually was upon seeing her: he had heard the news of Jeong Jeong's reappearance, and he had been desperate to hear the full story.

He had heard it indeed by now: Azula merely stayed as she was, her eyes set on the mahogany desk as she waited for him to pass judgment over everything she'd explained. She had spoken automatically, retelling her experiences in the Earth Kingdom while skipping over what neither Ozai nor Zhao needed to know. Her account of the attack on Sokka rendered them both speechless for at least a solid minute, until Ozai finally cleared his throat and shook his head.

"White Lotus," he muttered, his golden eyes cold and ruthless. His fist tightened. "Again, White Lotus. And again, they target you."

"Well… my gladiator. And it was linked to the previous attack, so I suppose it's not that surprising," she said. Ozai huffed.

"Yet, the worst of our criminals, a traitor and deserter, aiding the White Lotus," he said. "Leading them, according to what you discovered! And he's on the loose, for no one can even come close to capturing him?"

"I believe it's time we hunt him down properly, as we always should have," said Zhao, frowning and looking at Ozai. "He was a traitor already, but this changes everything, Ozai. If he's leading a rebel faction…"

"From what he said to my gladiator, he mustn't be the only leader. He implied the leadership may be fractured," Azula said. "He spoke of not approving of the attempt to rescue the men we captured in the Capital, and also spoke of Piandao's plans, plans that Jeong Jeong disagreed with…"

"Piandao too, the bastard," said Ozai, shaking his head. "I used to hold some respect for the man, despite knowing he had no love for royals, but for him to plot using that boy to manipulate you into becoming their tool…?"

"I don't see how it would have worked at all," said Zhao. "If the gladiator was not connected to the White Lotus through anyone but him, how could they have trusted he would influence the Princess after Piandao was gone? A foolish plan, if I've ever heard one."

"They don't seem to think a lot of matters thoroughly," Azula said. "But they're dangerous, to be sure. It feels like every possible dissenter of the Fire Nation regime might be joining their ranks. We can't sit idly by while Jeong Jeong and Piandao are gathering an army, for all we know…"

"They need to be found," said Ozai. "Immediately."

"Create a task force," Zhao suggested. "A special operations group that will apply our best reconnaissance tactics to find them. It won't be long before leads surface, leads that could bring us to their hiding place…"

"It could be a solution, if only we had the troops to assemble into this task force you speak of," Azula said. "Most soldiers are stationed in different colonies, and those who aren't there are at sea. Our army is always spread too thin."

"But this cannot go unpunished," said Zhao, looking at her sternly before realization dawned upon him. "Unless… do you mean to find them yourself?"

Azula's eyes flickered towards him, betraying some guilt. She could barely contain her urge to do as Zhao had said, but she would only proceed if her father allowed it… yet unsurprisingly, his answer was not what Azula wished it would be.

"Absolutely not," Ozai said. Azula frowned.

"I understand they're more dangerous than anything I've faced, but I won't be as reckless as I…" she started, until Ozai's stern frown silenced her.

"I will find my own way to handle this complication," he said, his voice charged with authority. "You will not concern yourself with it any further."

"But I…" she said, looking at him in confusion. "I've been targeted by them, my gladiator was nearly killed, and I'm supposed to stand by and wait while some task force handles the White Lotus? Do you really trust a task force will be enough to succeed? As I said before, can you even start one?"

"If we gather all the soldiers who aren't on duty right now, or perhaps set up a stricter conscription regime…" said Zhao. Azula raised her eyebrows.

"The White Lotus could have an army," she said. "If they're to be hunted down, it needs to be done by an effective leader, not by brand new recruits…"

"And as effective as you may be, Princess, you can't hope to defeat this potential army with ten Royal Guards, one gladiator and a dragon," said Zhao. "Not to mention, you are Fire Lord Ozai's heir. You should be avoiding risks, not jumping headfirst into them. Your cousin did not fare well after doing the opposite, did he?"

"I'm aware of that, but I don't like the idea of sitting idly by while I could be working to put a stop to them, too," said Azula, gritting her teeth.

"I'm sorry to hear that, Princess, but I'm afraid you will have no choice but to…"

"Silence, both of you," said Ozai, closing his eyes. "I will not discuss the course of action any further. The White Lotus will be stopped, but I will be the one to decide how to defeat them."

"Of course," said Azula, bowing her head towards Ozai, despite she was still disappointed.

Even though facing the bulk of the White Lotus was an apprehensive idea, the rage she felt towards them infused her with such power she felt like Sozin's Comet had returned all over again. Somehow, she felt as though she could defeat them with just that rage… but she also knew, just as the two men in the room knew it, that such thoughts were merely motivated by a reckless thirst for revenge. Reality surely would prove to be less than ideal, compared to her illusions to dismantle them by her own hand.

"I recommend that you spend the next days relaxing, Princess Azula," said Ozai. Azula raised an eyebrow. "See to it that you visit the royal spa. You have bags under your eyes."

"I…" she said, flushing ever so slightly. She had thought she had covered up the marks well enough, but if that had been the case, Ozai wouldn't have noticed them. "I shall, Father."

"Also, visit the Head Sage. Let him know gold fire served to heal that deadly wound," he said. "He should rejoice upon discovering that there was a purpose to it, after all."

"Oh, of course" said Azula, nodding.

"But in the meantime, you are not to worry about the White Lotus anymore," said Ozai, looking at her sternly. "You are too close to this as you are. You are not thinking clearly, and you need distance to perceive their hazard for what it is. Whether you were right or not about most your theories, even if Iroh turns out to be the spy, as you feared, I want you to stay away from this matter from now on. I will deal with it myself."

"But… how?" Azula asked. "I'm not asking because I doubt you, I just…"

"If I told you, you would not be keeping your distance from it," said Ozai, with a small smile. Azula sighed and lowered her head in defeat.

"Of course. I understand. Do what you believe is right," she said, knowing Ozai would do just that, regardless of her opinion.

"Do I have to keep my distance as well?" Zhao asked. "I haven't come across the White Lotus so far, so I'd think…"

"You have just heard your former master, whom you resented, is one of their leaders," said Ozai. "You have your own reasons to be too close to this matter, even if it may not trouble you as much as it does Azula. I won't have you involved either."

"Well, that is simply marvelous," said Zhao, looking at Ozai with disapproval. The Fire Lord raised his eyebrows. "First, removed from the Siege to the North. Now forbidden from joining your plans to uproot this rebellion. Did you bring me to the Fire Nation so I could be a wallflower, Ozai?"

"Is this defiance I hear?" he asked. "Truly, Zhao? Will we have to settle this with an Agni Kai…?"

"Why do you like settling all matters with Agni Kais? Is it because you know you'll always win?" Zhao asked. Ozai smirked.

"Indeed. Against anyone but Azula, I suppose," he said. Zhao snorted and shook his head.

"Like father, like daughter," he said, before growing serious again. "I'd very much rather be involved in this, Ozai. I can help. The Princess was not wrong: leadership will be needed and…"

"Only if we proceed with your recommended strategies, but I have made no promises to do that," said Ozai. Zhao grimaced, confused. "Busy yourself with your own matters, Zhao. Prepare for your eventual return to the north, maybe."

"You'll be returning soon?" Azula asked. Zhao shrugged.

"Whenever your father commands it. I am, clearly, ever at his beck and call," he said. "I suppose that's what friends are for, but being friends with the Fire Lord is more trouble than expected."

"Don't be so melodramatic, Zhao," said Ozai, smirking.

"Melodramatic, really?" said Zhao. "Well, then, I'll merely think about the north indeed. There's actually a new resource regarding the Northern Water Tribe that I should likely check on, all the way in the Earth Kingdom…"

"Oh? Why is it the first time I hear of this?" Ozai asked.

"Because I heard about it myself only this morning." said Zhao, with a dry smile. "I shouldn't take that long to find it, I hope. If it's worth it, I'll introduce you to this resource directly."

"Ah? So you won't tell me what it is yet? Playing mysterious now?"

"Aren't you doing the same?" said Zhao, smirking. Ozai barked with laughter.

"You vile, clever soldier. As you'd have it. I suppose the only one amongst us who's not trying to be dark and mysterious is Azula," he said, smiling at her. His daughter smiled back somewhat uncomfortably. Everyone had secrets in this room, that was clear, but no one had a worse one than her. The longer Ozai went without knowing that, the better.

"She's wise not to join in on this nonsense, truth be told," Zhao said, standing up. "Oh, very well then, Ozai, as ever you shall have your way. If you need my assistance in this matter somehow, please let me know. If not, I'll simply take off to check on that resource I mentioned."

"I shall do as much. Good luck with your mysterious quest, Admiral Zhao," said Ozai, nodding. Zhao smiled proudly at him, and with that, exited the room.

Azula swallowed, breathed deeply and made to follow Zhao's lead: the admiral had left the door open behind him.

"I'll take my leave as well, then," she said, once she was standing up. "May your plans bear fruit, Father. I truly hope that you'll succeed where I failed."

"Is that what your behavior is about?" Ozai asked. Azula froze. "Do you think you failed me, Azula?"

She stood where she was, her eyes gleaming with fear and uncertainty. She knew what worried her most wasn't entirely about her failure towards her father, but on a larger scale about her failure to protect Sokka. Either way, Ozai wasn't wrong about her behavior being related to failure indeed. She swallowed hard, and lowered her head.

"I'd hoped I could outmaneuver him," she said. "I thought I'd read him correctly. I simply…"

"You did the best anyone could have done, under your conditions, with what little knowledge and resources you had available," said Ozai, standing up as well. "If anything, it's a wonder that you almost made it back to Yu Dao safely."

"If we had only been quicker…" she whispered.

"It is what it is, Azula," said Ozai. "I know you're not used to the feeling of failure, efficient as you always have been, but this was no mission. This was a chaotic situation that arose when you were scarcely prepared to handle it. You did far too well, considering the circumstances. Though I still would like to have a word with Shinu after this…"

"Do you believe we would have been better off in the Stronghold, after all?" Azula asked.

"He cast you out into the wilderness, in the middle of the night, expecting you to fend for yourself so he wouldn't be held responsible for your safety," said Ozai. "A cowardly act, is what it was. Accursed fool. If I had anyone in mind to replace him, I'd do it in a heartbeat."

"That certainly lifts my spirits, somewhat," said Azula, with a weak smile.

"Well, that's good. Off you go to the Temple, then," said Ozai, nodding in her direction. "Preserving the Head Sage's support is…"

"My job, yes," said Azula, nodding. "I will go, then. I'll do my best to abide by your wishes, Father."

"Good. You always do," said Ozai, with an encouraging smirk.

Azula bowed her head towards him and turned to leave the room, and Ozai followed her to the door. He breathed deeply, waiting for a few minutes to pass before taking off as well, set on reaching the highest level of the Palace's main wing.

The high tower was seldom visited by anyone but him. No doubt Azula had explored it in her younger years, but she had never found what lurked within the shadows of the Palace's peak. Secrets of many sorts were concealed here, along with artifacts of old that had been set aside, their meaning often forgotten. To anyone, this would be as good as a common storage. For Ozai, it was a much more agreeable place than for most. He seldom left this place without finding answers for the questions he arrived with.

He opened the doors with the proper keys. He cleared his throat, pacing through the dark room slowly, knowing he would be heard:

"The situation is more complex than I anticipated," he spoke. "We cannot delay obtaining crucial information anymore. I have abided by that promise for far too long. I cannot do so anymore, not after this."

He stepped to the right, at the darkest corner of the room. His eyes gleamed with determination as the space in front of him seemed to twirl, to change, until it finally developed a shape. A humanoid shape.

"Question them through your methods," Ozai continued. The shape seemed to listen intently. "Find the truth, drive them mad if you must to achieve it, but find it. Once you have acquired as much information as possible, return to me. It is time we put an end to this farce of a rebellion they've been attempting to hatch by hiding in plain sight."

The creature shifted in the dark, moving towards the open window in the room. The hood that was heavy on his head shifted ever so slightly, so he could look at Ozai from underneath the cloth.

"It shall be as you request, Lord Ozai," spoke a broken, raspy voice. It was a contradictory blend of a deep and shrill voice in one.

"Then be on your way. We have time, but not forever," said Ozai. "This is your most delicate mission up to date. Do not fail me."

"I'd sooner die, Lord Ozai."

"Then off you go, Seethus," Ozai commanded.

The dark shape made to jump out through the window, a plum of blackness bursting under his foot. But within a brief instant, that one humanoid figure was nowhere to be seen. Ozai stepped towards the window glanced down to the Capital, wondering if he would find any sign of the morbid, dead-like man as he made his way through the air, relying on his myriad of dark skills to remain airborne: there was none. He was, as ever, untraceable.

Ozai smirked.

---

The only problem with fulfilling her father's order was that it would require for her to tell the story of what happened in the Earth Kingdom for the umpteenth time, Azula realized. She knew she would be free from this burden eventually, but it couldn't be helped for now, when most people were concerned and confused about what had befallen her while she was abroad. She tried to be mechanical, systematic, without saying anything compromising or distressing, but as much as she tried, she failed at keeping the images from bursting in her mind again. Blood, blood, on her hands, on her clothes, spilled around his limp body, and his blue eyes, beautiful and clear but clouded by the darkness that had threatened to yank him away from her…

She clenched her fists on her lap as she finished the story. The Head Sage's reaction was nothing like her father's, for his jaw had dropped and his hands were covering his mouth: as much as she appreciated his empathy, she had never expected him to be so emotionally invested in her struggles.

"That is… oh, Princess, that must have been terrifying. I'm so relieved you made it out safely," he said, shaking his head. "To think I had looked up to the man once! As good as revered him! And he would demean and treat you and your gladiator this way, when you are so wise and talented that you have achieved firebending styles he could only ever dream of! What a fool!"

"Fool is too light a word for what I'd call him," Azula confessed, her voice steady despite her emotions were threatening to spill out if she wasn't careful. "As much as I've found this strange use for gold fire during this journey, it's far from the way I would have wanted to discover it…"

"Cauterization of wounds is a complex matter, Princess," said the Head Sage. "It's a common enough practice, but no firebender should attempt it, usually. It has a tendency to worsen the damage… but you used gold fire and it worked. You were certainly fortunate that was the case."

"Indeed," said Azula, nodding. The Head Sage sighed and shook his head.

"And to think we even spoke about the Deserter the last time we met…" he said. "A most unhappy coincidence, is it not?"

It was… or was it?

Azula frowned, as the Head Sage stood up from his desk, searching for papers where he would write down the properties of gold fire. The Princess stared at him intently, a sense of foreboding rising within her. Her suspicions were wrong, they had to be. They'd better be.

"I'm still quite amazed that it worked at all," said the Head Sage. "But I'm sure the gladiator must be relieved that it did, of course."

"Indeed. He's back to eating like a wild beast and making ridiculous jokes," said Azula, raising her eyebrows. "In no time I'm sure he'll be himself again."

"Great news indeed," he said. "Truth is, I've never quite met him, have I? Perhaps for your next birthday… it's coming up soon, isn't it?"

"It is, but I won't allow my gladiator to attend it," said Azula, determinedly. The Head Sage gazed at her in surprise.

"To avoid another crisis like the one from last year?" he asked. "With Governor Kuan?"

"Rather, to make sure he heals properly through the rest of his recovery," said Azula, breathing deeply and making to stand up.

"Oh? You're leaving already?" the Head Sage asked. "I thought, well, that we could test your gold fire a little more… that is, of course, if you're in the mood. If you're not…"

"I have just returned home from what may have been my most catastrophic journey yet. I certainly would rather get some rest for the time being," she said. The Head Sage nodded, understanding.

"Of course, of course. You can come back when you've recovered from this shocking experience," he said, smiling gently at her.

"I shall do that, then. I do hope you'll excuse me," Azula said, trying to soften her harshness now as she bowed her head gently in the man's direction. He bowed with his entire torso.

"Go ahead, Princess," he said, and with that, she was free to leave his study.

She left the Sage's office, walked through the whole temple, made her way to the Palace again, and all the while, her heart was racing. She was definitely imagining things, she was thinking too much of it. Her mind was playing tricks on her, like the fortuneteller had told her it would… But the idea was already taking root in her mind, just as it had happened when she had first suspected of her uncle's potentially dark dealings.

Her father had ordered her to relax and forget about the White Lotus, but she couldn't do it. Part of her was apprehensive, perhaps even slightly scared, of what they were capable of. The other part, the reckless, proud side of her mind, was begging her to ask her father to let her lead the attack on the White Lotus, once they were found. She wanted to face Jeong Jeong herself and make him pay for it all: she wanted him to suffer through all the pain he had forced on Sokka, tenfold.

She had never thought she could hate someone quite as ferociously as she hated the Deserter, but nobody had ever been this close to tearing Sokka away from her for good. For so long she had feared, dreaded, that someone, something, would lure him away. That he'd change his mind, that he'd decide she truly was a monster, that he'd suddenly fall for someone else, that he'd choose his Tribe above her. She had failed to consider that he could be ripped away from her unwillingly, even though the threat of his death was looming, ever-present, because of the nature of their partnership and their relationship. His entire life revolved around circumstances that could easily lead to his death: he had fallen for her, for Azula, the one woman whose purity would certainly cost Sokka his life, and his line of work was in the fighting ring, where he had already faced murderous gladiators who'd been determined to kill him.

But he had always come out triumphant. Even at his worst, he had still endured every trial. And he certainly had endured them this time, too… but the panic that had festered in her heart had yet to fade away. Every moment without him seemed to reopen the poorly mended wounds across it. Every single time she saw him sleeping she had to pay attention to the rise and fall of his chest to make sure he was still breathing. It was something that had never happened to her before.

Her room felt safe, and her servants were as diligent as ever. They drew a bath for her, and she soaked in it while still battling the demons lurking in her mind. She sighed, her face between her hands, her hair framing and even hiding her eyes from the rest of the world. Her overwhelming misery and anxiety were easily masked before her father as fear of failure, but she needed to find a solution for them at haste. Her father would not stand for her to mope about this matter for long. She needed to get over it. Her birthday was coming again, that was right, she had to be in better shape for that…

But as she donned her sleeping robe and dropped on her bed heavily, she realized chances were she wouldn't feel better anytime soon. She could put up a front, pretend she was fine, smile even if she constantly felt like there was an ice-cold metal hand clasping and squeezing her heart. But she needed a solution for this problem, and she had to find it sooner than later. Maybe she could fool her father, the nobility, the soldiers, perhaps even her friends… but there was someone she couldn't fool, someone who she wouldn't even consider trying to fool at this point, not when it came to this. And just by looking upon him she would constantly remember his bleeding, broken body in that clearing…

The image blinked in her head again and she shook her head. She forced her eyes open, glared at the wall for a moment, but there it was again, in her mind's eye, and she cringed and huffed. Why? How? For how long would she have to endure this until she finally could forget it, or was it going to continue until she lost her mind for good?

There was only one solution for this problem, at least only one she knew of. She had put it into effect every night on her barge, since she'd had the chance to do so, but right now she wouldn't be able to do the same so easily. She couldn't see him until tomorrow. She couldn't believably go to his house and expect nobody to notice…

Only, her attempt at a nap had backfired for all the afternoon, and even a visit to the royal spa, to abide by her father's order, did nothing for her nerves. The masseuse had been aghast by the knots on her shoulders, and despite the older woman's best efforts were appreciated, Azula's stress didn't go anywhere. No number of royal hair combing sessions or manicures could change that, either. They were mindless activities. Her thoughts were back to square one before long.

Dinner as well was simple, lonely and quiet. She had never been one to dislike being alone, not in general, but she hated being alone right now. And it wasn't that any kind of company would suffice. She didn't want a distraction, didn't want a simple conversation: she just needed to know, for the thousandth time, if Sokka was alright.

Inviting sheets were now foreboding, arid, no longer providing the comfort they should. There would be no rest to be found on her bed, not for now. There would be no peace found in a life, in a love like this. Not when the heavy weight of death was dragging her down to her knees, leading her to beg the spirits, the universe, whatever powers there would be, for Sokka's heart to keep beating.

The images grew worse at night. They were too vivid, too shocking, even if she should have been used to them by now. Her entire body shivered uncontrollably in the middle of a warm night. She couldn't take it. She couldn't stand it. She needed to see him now. She needed to be by his side. Her reckless urge to destroy the White Lotus could go unfulfilled, but the reckless urge to see Sokka was unstoppable.

She pushed herself up to a sitting position, as good as possessed by the idea now. She needed him. He would be fine, he had to be, nothing wrong could have happened, but she needed to see him to be sure of that. She needed to pull up the carpet, and fire up the entrance to the tunnels. She needed to hold him, feel the slow and steady rise of his chest. She needed to run as fast as her legs could carry her, the tunnels well memorized. She needed to see him, to touch him, to know he was real. To know he wasn't going to disappear through her fingers, as water from a stream cupped between weak hands.

She needed him.

---

Silence reigned in the two-story house. Only the sound of wind rattling the leaves of the trees outside seemed to echo within the wooden walls. The world slept. The world wasn't watching. They wouldn't see her even as she pushed doors open quietly, sliding through the walls with as little noise as she could.

The floorboards creaked ever so slightly. She hoped it wouldn't wake him, though. She didn't want him to wake, she just wanted to be by his side, to see that he was fine, that her foolish worries were baseless. Laying her eyes upon him, even as he slept, usually was enough to drive the nightmarish images out of her mind.

But a sound finally reached her ears just as she pushed his bedroom door open. The sound of paper, rustling softly.

Her eyes widened and met his, finding his expression was just as dumbfounded as hers. As ever, she immediately felt stupid for worrying so much.

He looked perfectly fine. He was sitting on the mattress, his back against the pillows, relaxing against the headrest of the bed. He had a book between his crossed legs, and a bowl of what looked like sizzle-crisps next to him. Azula blinked blankly, and Sokka cocked his head to the side a little.

"Azula?" he said. "What… did something happen? Why are you here all of…?"

"I… I just lost it, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have… wait, why are you standing up? No! Stay put!"

"Shh! Song's asleep!" said Sokka, as Azula rushed to his side to make sure he wouldn't climb off the bed.

She dropped her hands on his shoulders and pushed him so he wouldn't climb off the mattress. Sokka pouted, setting aside the book somewhat clumsily and looking at her inquisitively from his sitting position.

"Are you crazy, really?" Azula asked, looking at him disapprovingly. "You're supposed to be resting. Why are you even awake?"

"Why are you? It's the middle of the night. Also… I've been sleeping almost all day, so I've gotten a fair share of rest," said Sokka, looking at her in confusion. "What happened, Azula? Are you okay? You look…"

"I'm… I'm fine. I just…" she said, sitting by the edge of the mattress and averting her gaze from his. Sokka frowned slightly.

"You couldn't sleep," he concluded. She snorted and shrugged.

"I suppose you'll wonder how is it I can't seem to sleep even though my body clearly demands for it, huh?" she whispered. Sokka smiled a little, lifting a hand to cup her face.

"Not really. We're both insomniacs, seems like" he said. "Did you guess I'd be awake, or…?"

"No, I didn't expect you to be. I just… wanted to make sure you were fine" she whispered, shaking her head. "I know, I know, it's a ridiculous reason for me to show up here in the middle of the night, but…"

"Hey…" he said, his free hand reaching out to clasp hers. "You can come find me whenever you need to. And I'm sure it'll never be ridiculous."

"Huh. That's a lot of blind confidence in me, isn't it?" she said, with a weak smile. "What if I decide I need to see you just to ask whether you like eggs better fried or boiled?"

Sokka chuckled and looked at her in disbelief as she closed her eyes and turned her face into his hand. She pressed a soft kiss to his palm, breathing deeply as her anxiety was soothed slowly but surely through Sokka's presence.

"If that happens, I'll ask if you're serious because that sounds very surreal to me, mind you," he said, smiling. "But heck, whatever the result, it'll probably be entertaining if you want to cook eggs."

"Your standards for entertainment are worrisome," Azula said. Sokka laughed and shrugged.

"I'm making do while being basically bed-ridden," he said, gesturing at his book. "Been reading on cultural practices, according to some ancient Fire Nation philosopher, I guess? He talks about some really strange stuff I never knew about, from all around the world…"

"And you have snacks too?" Azula asked. Sokka grimaced and shrugged.

"They're, uh, soy sizzle-crisps," he grunted. Azula blinked blankly.

"Wait, really?" she asked. "Sizzle-crisps can be made out of soy?"

"According to Song, yes," said Sokka, sighing. "She says soy is one of the best foods for me to replenish my strength and rebuild my blood content… though she said liver was even better. I told her that if she's planning on giving me any, to at least not make it komodo rhino…"

"Huh. A wise decision," said Azula. Sokka bit his lip and smiled.

"Want to join in with reading? Could be fun. Unless you actually have something to talk about, that is… is that why you came? Did your dad react badly over what happened?"

"No, he… he didn't," Azula said, shaking her head. Sokka hummed. "Though he doesn't want me involved in any attempts to chase down the White Lotus. I guess he thinks I'm not fit for the challenge as I am."

"Well, you do need more sleep before you can chase anyone," said Sokka, with a weak smile. Azula snorted.

"He said something similar. Funny," she said, dropping on the bed beside him. Sokka smiled and pressed his forehead to hers.

"Seems like the only thing he and I ever agree on is that you need to look after yourself when you're not feeling well," said Sokka. "I'd say, since we're the most important people in your life, you should listen to us."

"Oh, you are, huh?" Azula asked, smiling a little. "So cocky, boasting about it that way…"

"What, am I not supposed to?" he asked, smirking. "I'm sorry if you'd rather I lied about this, but I'm pretty pleased that you love me, Princess."

"Sure you are," she said, shaking her head and leaning closer to him.

His lips met hers, and more of her anxiety and grief seemed to fade as the kiss's touch appeased her. She sighed and closed her eyes, pressing her lips to his constantly, but lovingly, slowly. It wasn't like her usual wild kisses, it was far too tender in comparison: it felt as though she were treasuring the very fact that she could do this, that she could still lie beside him and claim his lips with her own. And Sokka was happy to let her do it as many times as she pleased, responding to her every kiss.

"I missed you," he whispered. She hummed and leaned closer to him, draping her arm around his chest, where he had no bandages or burns she needed to worry about.

"I missed you too," she said, keeping her forehead against his. He smiled weakly.

"Surprising of you to say it so easily, though," he said. "You usually remind me that we were together like, uh, less than a day ago, or so…"

"I guess?" she said, sighing and stroking his chest gently. "Maybe it felt like we really spent an eternity apart this time."

"Must be because we didn't kiss before parting ways," he said, pouting. She smiled. "It was bugging me all day, you know? I really had wanted to kiss you…"

"Don't you always," she whispered, her fingers trailing his collarbone and neck.

Her fingertips continued to rise, sliding over his stubble, stroking the hair on his chin ever so softly. She reached his lips, tracing their outline, and smiling whenever he kissed her fingers for what she was doing.

"You don't make it easy for me, you know, Princess," he said, his voice deeper than usual. Her heart seemed to skip a beat upon hearing it. "Maybe stop being so beautiful for a little while and I'll stop being so smitten."

"Oh? It's just my beauty, then?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.

"All your beauty, yes," he said, smiling. "Your body's, your mind's, your soul's…"

"That's beyond corny," she said, and he laughed.

"Well, maybe I am just that corny by nature," he said, kissing the tip of her nose. "Besides, you asked for it. That was a trap and there was no way I'd jump into it defenseless."

"Of course," she said, smiling weakly and closing her eyes.

Her fingers continued to trace him, slowly roaming his scars as they often did. Her caresses compelled him to relax, and to try to return the favor. His own hand rose to her cheek, knuckles grazing it softly.

"Nothing bad happened with your dad, then?" he asked. "Or was it something else bothered you…?"

"Uh, well, it might have been something else," Azula admitted, shrugging. She bit her lip lightly before sighing, her brow drawn together. "I'm just wondering if maybe I misjudged the situation, cast my vote too soon, something like that…"

"What do you mean?" Sokka inquired. "What situation?"

"The White Lotus," Azula said. "I'm going against what my father commanded, he said I was supposed to rest and forget everything about them, but I couldn't. I can't. He thought it was a good idea for me to distract myself by visiting the Head Sage and telling him about the wonderful use of gold fire…"

"Huh. And how did that go?" Sokka asked. He frowned when she tensed around him.

"Maybe I'm losing my mind," she whispered. His eyes widened. "Or maybe… maybe I am onto something by thinking he could be the reason this all happened in the first place."

"Woah. Wait a minute, what?" said Sokka, his eyes wide. Azula sighed and dropped her head on his shoulder.

"He was the one who talked about Jeong Jeong in the first place. He was his friend once. He admired him. Now he says he doesn't anymore, but what if that's a lie? What if…?"

"What if he was the spy all along, and not Iroh?" Sokka finished. Azula sighed.

"It seems extreme, but… it's not impossible, is it?"

"But… isn't that crazy?" said Sokka, swallowing hard. "A Sage? I mean, you mentioned your father doesn't get along with him, but…"

"Do you remember how the White Lotus people escaped from prison that day?" Azula asked. Sokka frowned.

"Their friends were disguised as guards, pretended they'd been ordered to move the prisoners… right?" said Sokka. Azula nodded.

"The reason they had a chance to do it was because the man in charge of the prisoners, Captain Kuo, wasn't in the prison's premises at the time," said Azula. "He wasn't there because my father was meditating in the Temple, and Kuo had wanted to inform him of what had happened with the men he'd captured. The Head Sage didn't let him speak to my father, though. The Head Sage… if Kuo hadn't wasted all that time, he might have intercepted the White Lotus men just as they were breaking out the White Lotus agents, if not sooner. So, if you think about it, how do we know he's not the one who helped them?"

Sokka's eyes were wide, his heart beating a little faster than it should these days. He huffed and blinked blankly, rubbing his forehead with his fingertips while Azula looked at him somewhat desperately.

"I'm not going mad, am I? Whenever something happens involving the White Lotus, he's always connected, even if indirectly," she said. "What if he told Jeong Jeong we would travel to Yu Dao, once he heard of it? What if…?"

"So, you think all his approval of you is a farce?" Sokka asked. "Because Jeong Jeong… the way he spoke of you, it didn't sound like he had a favorable opinion of you at all."

"Of course he doesn't," said Azula. "Why would he? And why would the Head Sage, if you think about it?"

"You're a talented firebender. If what he cared about is fire, rather than politics…" said Sokka. Azula snorted.

"That's far too wishful. He's probably been involved in politics since long before I was born, and I'm quite sure he's still as interested in games of power as ever."

"But then what about Iroh?" said Sokka. "He was suspicious as well, very suspicious. What of his link with the White Lotus? What about how he acted around me after what happened? The way he questioned me…"

"The way he's been behaving all along," said Azula, sighing. "He's suspicious, always has been. He could have easily tipped off Jeong Jeong as well, especially since he has been writing all those letters as of late. According to Toph, anyways…"

"Heck, that's a very valid point," Sokka said, his eyes widening. "He could have done it, and he has a motive to take revenge, to a degree. If you made it so Zuko can't be Fire Lord anymore, according to him…"

"Then he'd make me lose you, since you are, on great measure, the reason why I've risen as much as I have in the last years," she said, hiding her face in the crook of his neck. "Revenge on relatively equal terms?"

"Sounds like it. Do you really think he'd be that petty?" Sokka whispered. She shrugged.

"I don't know what to think about any of this," she said. "The more I ponder it, the more I worry about a potential secret alliance between Iroh and the Head Sage. I've never understood why they never joined forces to depose my father when Iroh returned home…"

"You expected them to?" he asked. She shrugged.

"I did. My father did. Everyone did," she said. "My father had prepared for it, for the Agni Kai he knew he would have to fight… but Iroh didn't demand for the return of his birthright. He just… remained complacent. If he was White Lotus, trying to put an end to the war, to the Fire Nation's regime, why didn't he act? I've never understood it."

"And I guess it's so confusing it literally keeps you up at night, huh?" he whispered, surrounding her shoulders with an arm. She groaned.

"It's just a little trouble sleeping. It's nothing serious," she lied.

"You'll have more trouble yet if you keep thinking about this," Sokka said.

"Like I can help it. If I don't think about this…" she started, but she stopped short of finishing her sentence. She couldn't tell him what was bothering her the most. She couldn't tell him that her constant mulling over what the White Lotus had done was more than just a whim, more than just a pursuit for revenge: it was one of the only ways to keep the image of his broken, bloodied body away from the forefront of her mind.

"What, you think no one will?" Sokka guessed, trying to finish her sentence. "Azula… you need to relax. To stop worrying about there being two spies instead of one. We should just rejoice that we made it back home safely, shouldn't we?"

"Did we, really?" she muttered, but she sighed and shrugged. "If you say so…"

"Here, entertain yourself with this," he said, showing her the book he'd been reading. Azula frowned. "A long study by some old Fire Nation crook, about traditions of other nations!"

"Huh. Where did you get that?" Azula asked, reaching to take the book in her hands.

"Song found it on sale, seems like nobody wanted it," said Sokka. "And it's pretty damn old, too. Must be like a hundred-and-fifty years-old, if not older."

"Looks like," said Azula, stroking the brown cover with confusion before opening it. "Are you sure you should be handling this sort of material when you're convalescing?"

"Well, why not?" he asked, pouting. "Song changed my bandages earlier today, the wounds are well protected from the dust. I'll be fine."

"Heh, well. If you end up sick, don't say I didn't warn you," she said, turning the pages over with curiosity. "Why this book?"

"Because it's great to see what the world used to be like," said Sokka. "You know, when you become Fire Lord, some of these traditions can come back, like the ones from the Earth Kingdom. I know it won't happen right away, but heh, there used to be so many different things! The Southern Water Tribe, for instance… it's quite amazing."

"What about it?" Azula asked, turning over the pages to find whatever he was referring to.

"There used to be more than one tribe down there," Sokka said. "There were multiple ones, but they merged into a single one during the war, so we'd be able to join forces against the constant attacks from the Fire Nation. But according to this guy, they used to have yearly competitions of so many different kinds, measuring which tribe had spawned the strongest members of their newest generation. Also, he talks a little about southern waterbending, heh. Whenever I go home, I'll have to tell my sister all about it."

"You said she was the last, didn't you?" Azula asked. "There was no master for her, right?"

"No, she learned all she did by herself," said Sokka, with a fond smile until his eyebrow twitched. "And she tormented me with everything she learned, too."

"And I bet you let her get away with all of it, didn't you?" Azula asked, smiling a little. Sokka snorted and shrugged.

"Heck, she was my sister. I snapped at her, she snapped at me, but in the end, I knew she'd always get the upper hand somehow," he said. Azula smiled at him and shook her head.

"You shouldn't be so gallant," she said, sighing and setting the book down. "Well, I can't find the Water Tribe's section. Most is about the Earth Kingdom…"

"Oh, it's further back," said Sokka, taking the book and scrolling through it.

By the time he opened it fully, blue pictures were indeed drawn on it… but one glance told Azula he had gotten the wrong section after all. Large symbols for the north were on the pages, decorating the section that described what looked like important rites of passage.

"Ah, well, that's the north," Sokka said, shrugging as he eyed the traditions that Azula was intrigued by. "But we do that too, though not quite like that…"

"Which one do you mean?" she asked. Sokka gestured at the depiction of an ice house.

"This, building your own house, with your own two hands, to prove you're fit to raise a family. We'd do it with igloos in the South, though," he said. Azula bit her lip.

"Did you ever do it?" she asked. "Build one of them, I mean…"

"Uh, not quite," said Sokka, chuckling. "Didn't need to. Had nobody to make a family with"

Azula's heart seemed to race upon hearing those words. What fool she was to wish he'd say he would gladly build one of those igloos now that he'd found her…

"These guys seem to do it with waterbending mostly. Like, their buildings are all crafts of waterbending," said Sokka. "So, I guess there were more waterbenders than non-bending warriors up north, eh?"

"Possibly," said Azula, passing the page.

"The South is somewhere close by, yeah…" said Sokka, but Azula stopped on the very next page. Sokka bit his lip and smiled. "And yep, that's the wedding rite, hehe. See, they do the ritual by cutting their palms, too…"

"I see," said Azula, smiling a little. "The one I'm supposed to do with you?"

"Just if you want to…" he said, smiling enthusiastically. "Unless you changed your mind about marrying me now, eh?"

"I haven't changed my mind, though I still fear it's impossible to achieve, realistically…" Azula whispered, pressing her lips softly to his shoulder as she passed the page. A drawing on the next one caught her attention. "And how about this? Is this betrothal necklace the same for you, too?"

"The what?" Sokka asked, raising his eyebrows. "Heh, I probably missed this page, I didn't… woah. Wait, wait, what?!"

Azula blinked blankly and looked at him. His eyes were wide, fixed upon the drawing.

"I take from your surprise that this is new information for you?" she said. Sokka nodded at first, but then shook his head.

"N-not as new as you'd think," he said. "We… in the Southern Water Tribe, we don't do this. As soon as a guy finishes his igloo, he's proven himself capable of raising a family and taking a wife. Until then, he doesn't get to ask a woman to marry him at all, so I guess that's different, but I… I had seen a necklace like this before."

"Oh? Maybe it's a relic from times gone by?" Azula inquired. "It might be this tradition used to exist in the South Pole too and you didn't know it."

"Oh, no, it's not that simple," said Sokka, shaking his head. "It was no relic: I'd seen it before, on someone from the South. On my sister."

"Wait, your sister?" Azula asked, raising her eyebrows. "Is she engaged to someone, then?"

"Not at all, she got it as inheritance from my mother," said Sokka, swallowing hard. At Azula's confused stare he shook his head. "Mother got it from my grandmother, the original owner of the necklace, who, I guess, told my dad to… to give it to his bride."

"Huh. That's confusing," said Azula, biting her lip. "But wait a minute, didn't you say that your grandmother…?"

"Was from the Northern Water Tribe?" Sokka finished. Azula's eyes widened with understanding. "Yeah, and I said she ran away to avoid marriage, too. Which means… she gave away the necklace her old betrothed must have made for her. She had my dad give it to my mom, and mom to Katara, and they have no idea what it used to mean…"

"Heh. It's somewhat… cruel, I must say," said Azula, with a weak smile. "She took that necklace and gave it a whole different meaning, didn't she?"

"And what's worse is my sister and mother probably had no idea," said Sokka, chuckling. "She never explained what the necklace was! I had no idea it was a symbol of betrothal! If Katara ever went up north they'd assume she's married or engaged to someone because of it, imagine that."

"Sounds awkward," said Azula, smiling and closing her eyes. "Did your grandmother ever explain why she left? What was so wrong about the man she was supposed to marry?"

"Heh, I don't know," said Sokka, shrugging. "Maybe she just didn't love him?"

Azula smiled, leaning close and kissing his cheek softly. Sokka glanced at her, a small smile on his face too.

"And the South gave her the right man instead. Why am I not surprised?" she whispered by his ear. Sokka chuckled.

"You'd have a few things in common, heh?" he said, smiling sweetly at her. Azula stroked his cheek, tracing the still healing wound across it before letting her fingers slide to the back of his head. Sokka hummed. "You think I'll have a scar on my cheek now…?"

"I don't know," Azula admitted. "Wouldn't look bad if it did, but maybe it wasn't deep enough for one…"

"I'd rather stop collecting scars, really, but if you don't mind it so much, I won't worry," he said, smiling.

Azula's fingers trailed his scalp, brushing his short hairs gently, sliding up to his wolf's tail and undoing it. His hair fell as graciously as ever over his face, and she took to sliding her fingers through the tresses, basking in the soft touch of his straight hair.

"So, you'd get along with Gran-Gran, likely," said Sokka, smiling. "I wonder what the look on my sister's face will be when I tell her what that necklace means…"

"She might not believe it… your grandmother will have quite a story to explain, huh?" said Azula, closing her eyes and letting her head fall on his shoulder again.

"It should be a funny one, though," said Sokka, kissing the top of her head. "Getting sleepy now?"

"I guess…" Azula whispered. Sokka smiled.

"Then sleep. It's okay," he whispered.

It surprised her that he would clasp her hand in his, guiding her fingers towards his torso. She gritted her teeth, realizing what he was doing.

She had snuck into his cabin every night ever since they had started traveling back to the Fire Nation. She had left her hand on his chest each of those times, feeling his soft heartbeat under her palm. She had tried to hold back from doing it until he was asleep, but it seemed he hadn't been all that unconscious after all. He had understood what she wanted, why she needed to touch his chest, to feel his heart against her hand.

She sighed, pressing closer to him. Sokka kissed the top of her head once more, hoping she would know now that he understood what this was really about. Hoping that she wouldn't be scared anymore, that she'd know he wasn't judging her in any way… though he had no doubts appeasing Azula would take much more work than this.

"I love you," she whispered, breathlessly. His fingers squeezed hers, and his heart continued to beat underneath them.

"I love you more," he said, somewhat teasingly. Azula snorted and shook her head.

"Not possible," she whispered. He smiled and prodded her face with his nose.

"Try me."

Azula knew he was coaxing her to raise her head, but she didn't quite want to comply at first. She didn't want him to see her tearful eyes, so she didn't let him. She kept her eyes closed and moved up to kiss him, not expecting her nose to crash with his chin before their lips could find each other.

"Ow, what're you headbutting me for?" Sokka asked, chuckling. Azula groaned, rubbing her nose with her fingers at first before laughing at the ridiculousness of the situation. "That's not how you prove you love me, you know?"

"Shut up…" she said, between laughs. She did open her eyes now, not afraid of showing her tears anymore even though they were still there.

Again, he passed no judgment. He smiled and moved closer to her, kissing her lips gently. Her free hand cupped his face, compelling him to linger, to suspend and help this moment last for as long as it could.

Azula's lips stopped responding soon enough, and Sokka smiled gently. He pressed one last kiss to her brow and sighed while closing his own eyes. Indeed, they both would rest better if they were in the comfort of each other's arms.

His fingers intertwined with hers, both hands still resting atop his beating heart.