The burial ceremony was quick: the preparations for it were far more complicated than the rite itself. The severe food shortage would have remained everyone's priority if only they hadn't lost the youngest member of the tribe.
The baby's corpse was bundled in furs, those his mother had sewed as blankets and clothes for him while she waited for his birth. The two toys his father had bequeathed for him had been tucked inside the furs too, as well as a small dagger, meant to protect him from the dangers he might face during his passage into the Spirit World.
Three wooden ships, the ones in better shape after the dreadful blizzard had coursed over them, set sail towards a nearby island, where the Tribe often traveled to find bamboo trees they relied on for their buildings and constructions. The other reason why they would ever visit said island, though, was to bury their fallen. The ritual was old, and it hinged on easing the dead's passage into whatever awaited them in the afterlife. By burying them near the many others who had passed away, it was believed their spirits would serve to guide the newly deceased's soul into the Spirit World, or into their next life…
It was a rite meant to offer some comfort, but there was none to be found in it for Yuro and Siku, parents of the lost baby. Siku was devastated, to the point where Hakoda hadn't been certain she would be able to partake in the funerary rites, but she had climbed aboard the ship with her husband and joined those who had traveled to the funeral in saying their farewells to their still nameless child.
Most women had stayed behind, to prepare the mourning feast, but some had opted to board the ships and offer their support to the young couple in such trying times. Many men had chosen not to attend the funeral either, instead taking off on emergency hunts in hopes to find food, anything that could fill the bellies of the famished villagers and prevent another untimely death like the one they were grief-ridden by.
Sparse words were spoken during the rite. Both Siku and Yuro cried as they laid the child's body in the small tomb that they had dug for their son. As the burial was finished, Aang softly sang an elegy of his people, biding farewell to the child's spirit as it crossed into a new world.
Zuko stood beside him as he sang, and although Aang's voice was pleasant to hear, the exiled prince's heart was being clenched, squished by a cruel force. Anxiety, sadness, despair: all of them clawed at him as he tried not to be selfish. As he tried to be there for Yuro, his friend and neighbor, rather than to fear for his own family's safety.
Even after all this time, there was a part of Zuko, violent and instinctive, that would drive him to do the unthinkable, to jump into impossible quests, to devote himself to tasks that seemed doomed even before he had begun them. And that part of Zuko was speaking loudly inside him now, demanding that he take action to save his family and the whole tribe before he found himself losing the only place where he had ever felt at peace, at home.
He was silent as he boarded the ship back to the Pole, uncertain of what to do. Hunting, fishing, all of it would seem futile if he couldn't haul at least twice as much game as he had the last year. The way things had gone so far, it didn't seem likely. He couldn't help but miss the ease with which food could be found in the Fire Nation or the Earth Kingdom, where farms, crops, shops would be available nearly anywhere. If not, there were trees, fruit, so many other possibilities… but in the Water Tribe there was no easy solution. Food was something he had taken for granted for so long, even when he had been traveling to find the Avatar, as his uncle always had money somehow and could afford their expenses… but money wouldn't save them here. The punishment for failure in the Water Tribe was more extreme than any he had experienced before.
Because this time it wasn't his father, punishing him for his apparent disrespect by setting his face on fire. It wasn't Zhao, rubbing in that he would never find, let alone catch, the Avatar. It wasn't his father's military leaders, scoffing at the sight of him and denying him passage through their held territories or rivers merely because he was the exiled prince, and they expected to gain further favor with the Fire Lord by pestering his banished son.
This time it was the land itself that was unforgiving, that seemed to take pleasure in tormenting the Water Tribe. It was as though they weren't welcome in their own home, unwanted, for nature itself seemed to wish to purge the Pole from all living things. The villagers were kind, loving, ever generous and supportive of each other: how could they possibly deserve to suffer in this way, when the vile monsters of his father's court dined in luxuries every day, surely deprecating the most opulent meals out of whims, without facing any consequences for their cruelty and the harm they had brought on the entire world?
It wasn't fair. The world he had been forced to live in was a harsh, cruel place, unbalanced and unhinged. Nothing made sense. And as it was trying so very hard to kill them all, it was up to Zuko to figure out a way to fight back before he lost the community he had grown to cherish, and the family that meant everything to him now.
He didn't know what solution he'd come up with, but it pained him to think a baby's death had been the final push to force him into taking action. How he wished he had acted on their nefarious circumstances sooner, to prevent the loss of Yuro's child…
The trip to the island had taken around four hours of sailing. Their empty stomachs pained them when they were on their way back, and although they were better accustomed to periods of shortages than most people were, the hunger took a toll on anyone. Even Aang, who always ate very little, seemed gaunt today, whether because of how devastated he was over the funeral or because of how badly he needed to eat something.
"You alright?" Zuko asked him as they were disembarking on the pole again. The tribe's warriors knew their ships best, and they took to docking them while the rest of the passengers returned to the village.
"I'm… fine" Aang said, with a weak grin "Just hoping everyone else is okay. Katara, well… she was really sad about this"
"Everyone is" Zuko whispered, as the two of them followed the first group that had started the long walk to the village "This isn't… it isn't right. I know they've been through harsh winters before, but being so powerless against forces of nature? How messed up is that?"
"Nature isn't just a silent companion for human life" Aang sighed "It can't be ruled, it can't be tamed, and as much as we live alongside it, as much as some of us can bend its elements, it's much more powerful than any of us could be. Things would be easier if we lived elsewhere, no doubt, but… for as long as we're here, this will always be a risk for the Tribe"
"Then maybe the Tribe ought to relocate" Zuko grumbled. Aang raised an eyebrow.
"Where to?" he asked "I can't imagine the Tribe living anywhere else, but if you do have an idea…"
"Nah, I really don't" Zuko admitted, sighing and shaking his head "I just… I know it will sound stupid, and selfish, but I can't let the first real home I've known get wiped out mercilessly by bad weather and famine"
"Why would it be selfish?" asked Aang, with a weak grin "Your attachment to the Tribe isn't a selfish thing, Zuko. It's… it's good that you care about it. If anything, that you're so worried about keeping everyone alive and healthy is selfless"
"Well… I suppose it is, in some ways" said Zuko, biting his lip "But I guess I feel selfish for saying that since this is about much more than just me losing my home. Isn't this tribe, this lifestyle, the only thing most of them even know?"
"It is" Aang nodded "And that you've thought about that proves, again, that you're not being selfish. We all have our reasons to fight, to live, to love. Having a motivation to act doesn't make someone inherently selfish, you know"
Zuko smiled a little and nodded. Aang grinned and patted his back gently.
"Sometimes I feel like the sifu instead of you, Zuko" Aang taunted him. The grin on Zuko's face vanished as he glared at Aang, who laughed carelessly.
The ease of their smiles and conversation died out barely half an hour later. As much as talking to Aang could raise Zuko's spirits sometimes, seeing the village as downcast as it was right now, even during an outdoors feast, proved to be a devastating blow to his mood all over again; he hurried to where Suki was sitting before the fire, with Mari nestled on her lap, napping.
"You're back" Suki said, with a weak grin. Zuko nodded and knelt beside her, pressing a soft kiss to her cheek.
"Are you both alright?" he asked "Did you get something to eat?"
"Kanna made us some soup" Suki said "It was nice to have something warm to eat, and Mari felt better afterwards"
"Better enough to take a nap, I see" Zuko smiled, stroking the little girl's hair gently.
"The hunters came back" Suki said. Zuko tensed up "They didn't hunt much, but they could find dead animals, so… it's something"
"Oh. Well, yeah. That's a relief" said Zuko, sighing as he sat down next to Suki.
"Though most of them say this won't be enough" Suki admitted "It might serve for a week or two, but if things don't get any better…"
"One thing at a time?" Zuko asked. Suki smiled and nodded.
"Yeah" she said. Zuko breathed deeply.
"I'll make sure to join the next hunting party" he said "I don't know how much help I'll be, but…"
"You'll be much more help than you think, you're getting better and better at it every day. Hakoda said so" Suki smiled, though the grin faded moments later "How are Yuro and Siku?"
"As you'd expect" Zuko sighed "Devastated, sad… they need as much support as we can offer them"
"I wish there was more we could do" said Suki, dropping her head on Zuko's shoulder "They've always been such nice neighbors, and this kind of loss is… it's irreparable. I don't think I'd ever get over it if…"
"No. Don't even think it" Zuko said, squeezing her shoulder and pulling her closer "Please, Suki"
She nodded and pressed her head to his neck, the fur that lined the borders of his parka soft and even ticklish under her nose. Zuko held her gently, reassuring her with his warmth, without speaking another word, that he would never let their family suffer a loss like the one their friends had endured.
He had been sitting with Suki briefly when he spotted Kino: the former soldier was carrying bones and spare wood for the fire. He rushed towards them right after setting down the kindling, and only then did Zuko realize he was still covered up to his neck with several layers of outerwear.
"Zuko! It's good you're back" he said, releasing a trembling breath "Did… did everything go well?"
"As well as it could have, considering what it was" Zuko sighed "You? Caught any fish?"
"Well… just a small one" Kino sighed "I had hoped to stay behind just to make sure we could all eat, but…"
"A small one's already better than everything I've caught in the last three weeks" Zuko said.
"That's just because you like hunting better than fishing" Kino declared proudly. Zuko smiled and shook his head.
"When I said everything I've caught, I was including hunting as well as fishing" he said. Kino grimaced "So… thanks for the tiny fish, I guess"
"W-well, it's small, not tiny, there's a difference…" Kino mumbled, before glancing about himself with uncertainty "Aang's back too?"
"He's off looking for Katara" Zuko explained. Kino bit his lip.
"She's taking it the hardest" Kino said, softly.
"What, does she think she should've braved the blizzard alone and made her way to their igloo to check on the baby?" Zuko asked, raising his eyebrows.
"Uh… yeah. Pretty much" said Kino. Zuko scoffed.
"The thing is, she's saying the baby was weak and not as healthy as he should have been ever since he was born" Suki explained "So, well… she thinks if she'd worked harder to keep him healthy before the blizzard hit, she could've saved him"
"Or he might have died anyways" Zuko mumbled "I'm not trying to be a jerk, but… she can't be sure she could've helped any more than she did. It's not her fault"
"Well, maybe you should tell her that yourself" said Suki, smiling a little "Maybe hearing it from you, of all people, will finally drive the message across. But for now, she's just scurrying around every household, checking on the ill and hungry and helping them however she can"
"It's not good for her to overwork herself that way" Kino whispered "But she's not listening to reason"
"In a sense I can't blame her" Zuko sighed "If… if I thought there's anything I can do to help, I'd do it. But short of spending all my time trying to find something to eat…"
"Makes you miss the times when things were easier, huh?" said Suki, rubbing Zuko's hand gently in hers "Though I guess we've all had hardships of different kinds, but this… this one's new for the three of us, at least"
"Is it, though…?" Zuko said, frowning before glancing at Kino "Did you guys never get shortages like this while you were in the settlement?"
"Uh… you mean the regiment I used to be in?" Kino asked, blinking blankly "Well… no. If things got rough, we'd just send word to our allies back in Whaletail Island and they'd send more food or whatever we needed… well, I say we, but that's just a general, collective 'we', it was the Captain who did it, I never got to do it…"
"It's not like we can send word to Whaletail Island anyhow, no one there would help us" Suki sighed "But it makes sense that that would be the solution. Things work very differently in the Fire Nation…"
"They do" said Zuko, his frown gaining a different quality now "But… that could help us anyhow"
"What could?" said Suki, looking at him with confusion "The Fire Nation?"
"I know it sounds insane, but…" said Zuko, glancing at his wife with uncertainty "Maybe we could go to Whaletail Island. Maybe we could buy all we need, and…"
"With whose money?" asked Kino, raising an eyebrow "If things are as I remember them, they're not going to let us just… grab whatever we want freely. They'd put us in the pokey…"
"We could take up temporary jobs, daily jobs at docks or so. There are ways to make quick money" Zuko said, looking at Kino with earnest eyes "There were members of my crew who would do that if we were docked for too long. That way they didn't have to depend only on whatever my uncle paid them, and they could blow their winnings on drinks or whatever they wanted to buy"
"Huh. So… really?" said Kino, eyes widening "Do you think we could just… skip over to Whaletail Island and, well, fix things?"
"I doubt it'd be as easy as that" said Suki, sitting upright again and looking at Zuko with curiosity "It might take several trips for you to gather enough food, but if there's hunters still working hard to find food here, it wouldn't be like we'd depend only on achieving success at Whaletail Island, right?"
"And if it's done on several trips…" said Kino "Maybe more people could go on later trips, you know? And with more people working, there'd be more money and it'd be possible to buy more stuff!"
"Oh, boy. What sort of outlandish ideas are you making up now, Kino?"
The young man jumped and glanced over his shoulder at Aang, who was smiling at him fondly. Behind him stood Katara, weary and downcast like they'd never seen her before. Despite all he argued with the girl, Zuko couldn't help feeling sympathetic towards her right now.
"I-it wasn't me! It was Zuko!" Kino blurted out, nervously. Zuko rolled his eyes as Aang and Katara raised their eyes towards him now, surprised and confused.
"Is this just one of Kino's typical attempts to deflect his responsibility in nonsense, or is he telling the truth?" Katara asked. Zuko folded his arms over his chest.
"For once, he's not just joking around. I had, uh… an idea" he said, biting his lip "But I'm honestly not sure how successful I might be. If I manage to do it, I could help the tribe pull through this mess, but if I don't…"
"If you explained what you have in mind, we might be able to help, if just a bit" Aang said, grinning weakly and taking his seat next to Kino. Katara sat beside him moments later, clearly preferring to discuss whatever Zuko had in mind than talk about the tragedy that had unfolded on that very long and difficult day…
"I thought that going to Whaletail Island to find temporary jobs could help me make enough money to buy food there and bring it here" Zuko said, in a single breath. Aang and Katara stared at him in surprise "It's crazy, I guess, but… maybe it could be done, why not? The tribe's ships are pretty good at breaking the currents, so…"
"You… you're serious?" Katara asked, eyes wide "Do you think… do you think if we do this, we'll be able to feed everyone?"
"Wait, 'we'?" Zuko said, blinking blankly "Uh, I don't know about 'we'. I figured I'd go, at least for starters, but…"
"You, alone?" Katara asked, skeptical.
"No offense, Prince Zuko, but the last time you braved those waters without anyone more experienced in sailing to assist you, you wound up… uh, here" said Kino, with a sad smile. Zuko scowled.
"Like I said, the Water Tribe's ships are versatile and strong. They're better equipped to fight the currents" Zuko declared.
"So… let's see" said Aang, tapping his chin with a finger "You plan on going to an island that's become a Fire Nation colony, with a Water Tribe ship? Won't that raise a lot of suspicions?"
"Not to mention, aren't you a wanted man or something, Fire Lord's son?" Katara asked, raising an eyebrow "You say you should go, but frankly, wouldn't you stand out a lot anyhow?"
"You think you'd blend in better? Blue eyes don't pass as Fire Nation, no matter where you go" Zuko huffed.
"Alright, then not me either, but you're not exactly the greatest choice even if you did have the idea…" Katara said.
"It should be me!" Kino exclaimed, beaming. The entire group stared at him in disbelief "Hey, I've always been so inconspicuous no one even noticed me in my regiment, and I look perfectly Fire Nation, don't I?"
"He's… not wrong" said Suki, with a crooked smile.
"Maybe not, but he can't do this alone!" Zuko said, grimacing "It's Kino!"
"Hey! What does that mean?!"
"You're the same guy who ate all his igloo's provisions days before the blizzard ended" Zuko said, matter-of-factly. Kino blushed "Excuse me if I'm not giddy about entrusting an entire operation to help feed the Tribe to you alone"
"Then I could go with him" Aang suggested "I mean, I wouldn't cause any trouble, for sure. And as much as I don't look that much like I'm Fire Nation, I also don't look too different, I'd say?"
"And you'll go around the entire town calling people 'hotman', so you're definitely not going to call attention to yourself. Sure thing" Zuko said, rolling his eyes.
"Okay, then it looks like the mission's over before it even begins because we're all unfit for it, one way or another!" Katara said, with a sarcastic smile. Zuko grimaced "Really, though… this isn't a terrible idea. We might just make this work, but from what I can tell, none of us can do it alone. So… how about we all go instead?"
"Wait, all of us?" Kino asked, a slow smile spreading over his face "Like a real, awesome undercover mission of the sorts I always dreamt of?"
"Yeah, I suppose" said Katara, shrugging but grinning a little too "It's just… I have joined a few hunting parties here and there, but I haven't been able to help much. None of us has been much use at helping find food, have we? So… why not try this? At the very least?"
"Well, I guess going as a group might work" said Zuko, biting his lip before glancing at Suki who had been largely quiet so far "Though… could you make the trip?"
"Me?" Suki said, raising her eyebrows "Did you already forget what happened the last time I was pregnant while on a ship?"
"W-well, yeah" Zuko said, grimacing "Damn. I had thought… it'd be better if you could come along, is all"
"I'd like to go, believe me… it might even be a nice change of pace to see some colors other than white once in a while" Suki laughed "But I shouldn't be careless when I'm pregnant, and Mari needs to be looked after, too. So… I guess that even if you convince Hakoda that this trip is worth it, I'd still have to stay behind"
"That's… I mean, it makes sense, but traveling with just these guys?" Katara asked, looking at Suki with despair in her eyes. Suki laughed while both Kino and Aang gasped in indignation.
"What's that supposed to mean?!" Kino exclaimed.
"You wouldn't want to travel with me? But you've already done it before…" Aang pouted.
"You're fine, Aang. Only you, though: Kino? Zuko? Ugh…" said Katara, rolling her eyes. Zuko smiled.
"That's okay, we feel the same way about traveling with you" he returned the jibe. Katara smirked.
"Nice to know we're on the same page on something, huh?" she answered, sarcastically.
"Wait, I'm not on the same page! I thought this would be fun! Hey!" Kino squeaked. The rest of the group laughed at his confused interjection.
It was scary, Zuko couldn't deny it. But something in his gut told him this was the right idea, even if he hated not being able to bring Suki with them. He guessed it would be a powerful motivator so he would come home as soon as possible… but he needed to make sure there'd be a trip at all, in the first place. And the only way to do that was to ask the chief for his permission, and he surely had plenty of problems to worry about without adding a trip to Whaletail Island to the list.
Zuko had hoped to speak to Hakoda alone, assuming the man would be more receptive that way… but, unsurprisingly, his three would-be traveling companions were so determined to join him on his new quest that he couldn't shake them off for the remainder of the day, let alone could he convince them to let him talk to Hakoda on his own terms. Busy as Hakoda was, though, they wouldn't have a chance to speak with him until the next day: Zuko was resigned by then to accept that he'd have to bring the whole group with him to his meeting with the chief.
Hakoda had been downcast all night, and his mood didn't improve the next morning. His daughter could only watch him with concern over breakfast: the wrinkles around his eyes seemed more prominent, and the graying hair was no longer limited to his temples. Even his trimmed beard was accentuated by some white hairs. Normally Katara could ignore the marks of age over her father's weary body, but today it seemed far more difficult to do that. This anguished, grief-ridden life was consuming him.
"Say, Dad…" Katara whispered "The boys want to talk to you about, well, something"
"The boys?" Hakoda asked, raising his eyebrows "You mean Aang, Kino and Zuko, I assume"
"Yeah, it seems Zuko has a bit of an idea… well, I'm not sure if it was Zuko alone who came up with it, really" said Katara, biting her lower lip "At any rate, do you think you can listen to them today, or…?"
"What is this about?" Hakoda asked, before setting down his bowl. It hadn't even been half-full today. He would have to try his hardest to ignore the promised churning of his stomach by midmorning, one way or another.
"The food crisis" Katara said. Hakoda sighed.
"Well, it's on all our minds, I suppose…" he admitted "I have to sharpen my spears, I can hear them out while I do that"
"Great" said Katara, smiling encouragingly "I really think it's a good idea, but I don't know if you'll agree, so…"
"You know what they want to talk about?" Hakoda asked "You ought to tell me yourself, then. Spare them the bother…"
"I don't think I'd be too convincing on my own" Katara admitted, lowering her head. Hakoda snorted.
"After all these years of fighting with me over anything and everything, now you're backing down on a challenge this easily, Katara?" he asked, amused "That's very much unlike you"
"I know, I know, but… really, it's better if they're the ones to tell you" she said, smiling "It won't feel right for me to take credit for their grand idea"
"Fine, fine…" said Hakoda, shrugging before standing up "I'll check on your grandmother, and I'll go sharpen my weapons outside afterwards"
"Great" said Katara, smiling and nodding "Thanks, Dad"
Kanna had taken to sleeping more than she used to, even if she was still strong and lively whenever she woke up. Katara hoped, deeply, that it was only a matter of how little food they were eating lately, and not the effects of decay and old age… but even if her hopes turned out to be true, there would be nothing she could do to help her grandmother for the time being. Not unless Hakoda relented in allowing them to travel to Whaletail Island, anyhow.
She didn't want to endure it again. She had already lost her brother, her mother… and the baby boy from yesterday had only been yet another scar across Katara's battered heart. She hadn't been ready to face that kind of loss either, not when she was certain she could have done something to save him. Not when she feared that Yuro and Siku would never be the same after what had happened with their son.
There was nothing she could do to fix it now, and it hurt to acknowledge that harsh truth. But if she didn't try to set at least one thing right, Katara didn't think she would ever forgive herself. She had taken up her brother's mantle once he had been taken away, turning into the leader of her tribe's warriors. If she truly wanted to consider herself a leader, she had to act the part and no bigger challenge required her to do that than this one.
Aang, Kino and Zuko had been waiting by Zuko's igloo. Katara gestured at them to follow her to her own home as soon as she caught sight of them, and they did as much without further ado, nervous expectation clear across all their faces.
"So, the way we're going to do this is…" said Kino, eyes shifting side to side.
"Leave it to Aang?" Zuko said. Aang tensed up "What? You don't want to do it?"
"I… I'm not sure I'll be convincing enough" the Avatar said, scratching the top of his head. Zuko scoffed.
"Aren't you supposed to be the Avatar, bridge between the spirits and humans, protector of balance and harmony in the entire world?" he asked.
"Have you seen me practicing those disciplines much?" Aang pouted "Yeah, didn't think so. Maybe I'm expected to be a good speaker, but…"
Hakoda's igloo came into view by then, and the chief was climbing the entrance's stairs, spears in his arms, when he noticed the four young adults coming his way. He sighed and took his seat to the side, picking up his whetstone and pressing it to the tip of his weapons. He had already gotten started with sharpening the first spear when the four of them stopped before him.
"Alright, alright, what's this big idea of yours?" he asked. The three men flinched.
"I should've mentioned I already told him you guys wanted to talk with him about an idea you had…" Katara said, with an uneasy grin.
"Might as well have told him everything, then" said Zuko, before shaking his head and stepping forward "Alright, the thing is, after talking with Kino yesterday I started thinking… maybe we could go find food elsewhere, seeing how harsh things are in the Pole right now"
"Elsewhere?" Hakoda repeated, skeptical "What exactly do you mean by 'elsewhere'?"
"I mean… in Whaletail Island" Zuko said. Hakoda dropped the whetstone only to look at him in wary disbelief.
"Are you asking for permission to assault a Fire Nation colony…?" he asked.
"No, no! I thought we could get jobs, temporary jobs!" Zuko explained, as the others stifled laughs. He scowled at them "Well, if you thought you could do a better job of explaining this, you should've done it yourselves!"
"The thing is, well, the four of us might be able to make enough money to buy food and feed the whole village" said Aang "That's what Zuko thinks, anyhow. It might be crazy, I guess… but isn't it worth a shot?"
Hakoda huffed, picking up his whetstone again and focusing on his spears.
"'The four of us', you said? You want to go too, Aang?" he asked. The Avatar blushed.
"I… do?"
"Both you and Zuko are as good as wanted criminals for the Fire Nation, aren't you?" Hakoda said "Can you be sure you won't be recognized if you reach the island?"
"I'd like to think so…" whispered Aang. Kino was the one to step forward now, to everyone's surprise.
"Maybe no one else thought of disguises yet, but I did!" he exclaimed "I still have my soldier's uniform, and I'm pretty sure some other clothes must have been left behind at the settlement somewhere. If they wear those, no one will know who they are!"
"And why would soldiers need jobs?" Hakoda sighed. Kino froze "You'll need other kinds of clothes, not uniforms. You'd need casual Fire Nation wear instead"
"I have some myself" Zuko said, frowning "From back when I first got here. Some of those clothes must still be in my packs somewhere…"
"I suppose that's better" Hakoda said "And you hope to get there… how?"
"The Tribe's ships…"
"None of you know how to sail them properly" Hakoda said.
"But maybe we could learn?" Katara said "I have some idea, and I'm sure it can't be that difficult…"
"You'll stand out immediately as invaders in Fire Nation controlled waters" Hakoda said "You can't take any of our ships if you hope to keep a low profile, and keeping a low profile will already be difficult with a Water Tribe girl, a man whose face is scarred exactly like Prince Zuko's, and another man with arrow patterns visible on his hands and forehead…"
"Well, then… we could take Appa?" Aang suggested, with a weak grin. Hakoda sighed and shook his head.
"Even worse" he said "The settlement's soldiers were relocated to Whaletail Island: if they recognize him, they'll know you're there right away"
"So, what? Are you saying it's impossible?" Katara asked, looking at him in despair "Dad, if we don't do this now…!"
"Thaw Zuko's tiny ship"
Katara's rant stopped cold upon Hakoda's sudden suggestion. Zuko's eyes widened as Aang and Kino glanced at each other, confused but pleasantly surprised all the same.
"It's of Fire Nation make" Hakoda explained "You and Aang are waterbenders, you can aid its passage through the worst of the currents. If you reach Whaletail Island in a small ship that doesn't stand out in the least, you'd have a better chance at remaining unnoticed"
"That's… brilliant" said Aang, before smiling brightly "So you're saying… we can go?"
Hakoda sighed, his eyes sullen. All four travelers were taken aback by the defeated expression their chief offered them.
"I'm not sure how many of us will survive this winter" he confessed "I am… I am willing to do whatever may be necessary to make it through. If this is a possible solution, I'm willing to try it… provided you four swear to me you won't take unnecessary risks and you'll protect yourselves properly"
"O-oh…" said Aang "Well, we will, of course. I don't think any of us want to be caught by the Fire Nation, right?"
"Absolutely not" said Zuko, frowning and trying not to imagine what might happen to his family if he was imprisoned by the Fire Nation…
"Don't worry, Dad. We'll stay safe and we'll come back as soon as we have enough food to fill that tiny boat of Zuko's" said Katara, smiling at Hakoda, who sighed and shrugged.
"Something tells me I'm having a leave of my senses" he whispered "Of all people, you four are the last ones I want undertaking these sorts of missions…"
"Because you like us best?" Kino asked, with a dorky grin. Everyone glared at him skeptically "Okay, okay, I'll shut up…"
"Because you'll be in far more danger than I want any of you in" said Hakoda, shaking his head "The worst part is… there are just as many reasons for you four not to go as there are reasons for you to be the ones to do it, if anyone should. That ship isn't well equipped to sail around these waters, so you need benders to help you sail it; you three, Aang, Kino and Zuko, are the only ones amongst the Tribe who don't look like us, so you may yet manage to go unnoticed as long as you don't bring much attention to yourselves. And Zuko and Kino are the ones who know how the Fire Nation works these days, so their knowledge on that front is definitely necessary…"
"And this could help me and Aang get a better grasp of how the Fire Nation behaves" Katara suggested "I know the plan to rescue Sokka isn't our top priority right now because of the blizzards and all, but maybe we can learn more about how to blend in at the Capital if we can blend in at Whaletail Island. Right?"
"Frankly, I hadn't even thought about that… but it's true enough" said Hakoda, sighing and nodding "Alright, then. I guess… I guess I'll give you leave to do this. I'm trusting you four not to make a mess of this opportunity… and I'm doing it because I really don't think we have any better alternatives as things stand. No other option looks promising, so… maybe you'll end up saving the Tribe with this crazy trip of yours, who knows?"
The four glanced at one another with pleased smiles now. Hakoda's agreement felt like resignation rather than approval, but it was far better than the blunt refusal they had feared they'd receive.
It took them a few days to prepare fully for their trip. By the time they had gathered the right sets of clothing – a mix of Zuko and Suki's old clothes, along with a few less formal clothes Kino had scavenged out of the empty settlement – the entire Tribe was aware of what they were doing, and there were just as many curious eyes gazing at them, as they worked to assemble what they'd need, as there were disapproving frowns. Not a lot of people saw the sense in finding any help or food in colonies that were controlled by the enemy, and most of them had already taken for granted that the four would be captured before long. Zuko was, indeed, an exiled prince and he would be a traitor in his father's eyes if it was known he was loyal to the Water Tribe now: Kino was a traitor in his own right, for he had deserted the Fire Nation army. Katara was the waterbender who had fought against the settlement for years, and Aang was the Avatar, no less. There were more than enough reasons to fear for their safety, and to think their endeavor was folly, to say the least.
Regardless of the understandable apprehension from the tribe's most cautious members, all preparations were going well enough, though Zuko's anxiety only seemed to increase because of that. Suki smiled and reassured him as much as she could the night before the trip, but the firebender was far too tense and uneasy about leaving his family for longer than a single afternoon.
"I know you won't be alone, Hakoda will check on you all the time…" Zuko sighed, sitting before their house's small fire, with Gruff's head resting on his lap "But I can't help but worry. If anything happens and I'm not here…"
"Nothing will, Zuko" Suki said, reaching out to take his hand in hers "We'll take care of ourselves, and before you know it, you'll be home, aglow with triumph…"
"Heh. With my track record, chances are I'll come home sulking in failure instead" Zuko said, with a small smile. Suki huffed.
"Really, now? As far as I can tell, ever since we started living here, things have been improving constantly for the two of us" Suki said "It's not that you shouldn't worry, love, but give yourself some credit, at the very least. We have a home that you built for us, a community that welcomes us, friends who care about us, even a dog who's stoked to see you every day when you come home from hunts or meetings or whatnot… and of course, the loveliest daughter we could have dreamt of. How is any of that a failure, huh?"
"See, that's the thing, it's all been too smooth and easy" Zuko smiled "I haven't messed up anything important in too long and that's just not normal, is it?"
"You're impossible" said Suki, smiling and kissing his cheek "Anyways, are you fully stacked up on provisions for the journey?"
"As much as I can be, yeah" Zuko said, reaching for his pack to show Suki its contents "I'm bringing my old dao swords with me, just in case… I figure maybe someone might want to hire extra protection for a day or two? I don't know…"
"That would be helpful" said Suki, smiling as Zuko opened the pack.
"So, I've got…" he started, but his eyes widened upon finding that there was one unexpected stowaway atop the few bundles of food he'd placed inside his bags.
Mari had few toys, but none quite as beloved as the poorly-stitched doll that sat inside Zuko's bag right now. His lips parted as he pulled it out, staring at it in confusion.
"I didn't put this in here, if that's what you're thinking" he told Suki, raising his eyebrows.
"Mari?" Suki called the little girl, who was in her room right now.
It took a moment for the child to emerge, her large gold eyes gleaming as she crawled over the bamboo floor. She was still wearing her parka, even if she had been indoors for a few hours now.
"Your friend here snuck into my bag" Zuko said, showing Mari the doll.
The little girl pushed herself up to her feet and ran towards her father. But instead of taking the doll possessively, as she often did whenever anyone else touched it, she pushed it to her father instead.
"Daddy puts away clothes. I put away my doll" she said, with certainty.
"I'm going on a short trip, Mari" Zuko said, turning to hug her. Gruff grunted when he shifted, his head dropping off his master's lap "That's why I was putting stuff away. You don't have to put away your toys"
"Trip? Daddy bringing food?" she asked, her head tilted sideways.
"Yeah, but not the way I usually do" Zuko explained "This time I'm not just going hunting: I'll travel across the ocean and I'll visit an island. There might be food there, and I hope to bring some here"
"Food… cookies?" Mari asked, with a wild smile. Zuko chuckled and shrugged.
"If I can make it so, yeah"
"Mari goes too!" she declared, beaming. Zuko sighed and shook his head, kissing her brow softly.
"No, dear. You have to stay here with your Mommy, or she'll be very lonely"
"Mommy goes too?"
"Mommy is pregnant and can't travel because of that" said Zuko, caressing her hair "Believe me, if I could I'd bring the both of you, I would… but it's better if you stay"
"Then… Dolly goes with you" Mari said. Zuko frowned.
"She's your favorite toy, Mari. You shouldn't…"
"Dolly is your friend" said Mari, smiling "She will make you not be lonely"
"O-oh. I see" said Zuko, with a sad grin "Then… well, as long as you promise you won't miss her too much, I'll bring her with me. But she'll miss you lots, you know that, right?"
"Dolly wants to be with Daddy. I asked" Mari declared, casually, as though the doll's wishes were factual rather than a matter of make-belief. Zuko smiled and shrugged.
"Alright, then. Alright" he said, shaking his head and hugging her gently "You're a wonderful little girl, you know?"
Mari giggled as she was swept into her father's embrace. She waved at Suki, as though to beckon her to join them, even though Suki couldn't quite do so, with her large belly in the way. She smiled warmly at the sight of them, though, ever delighted to see the bond between her husband and daughter was tighter every day.
Everything was set for their journey to begin on the next day. Katara and Aang had taken off ahead of Zuko to thaw the ship, and Kino had tagged along with them. They had said their goodbyes to Hakoda and Kanna already, leaving Zuko to do as much by himself in the morning.
"Please… take care of yourself, and those three" Hakoda nearly pleaded with him, and Zuko smiled sympathetically "I know it's quite a lot to ask, but you know why I'm asking…"
"I'd be too embarrassed to let Aang wander Whaletail Island calling everyone 'hotman', so don't worry, I'll do my best to keep them in check" he said "I know this is a pretty crazy idea, and there are a lot of things that could go wrong… but we'll do our best to return safely, with all the food we can carry"
"That would be wonderful, but the safe return must be the first priority" Kanna said, smiling at Zuko. She had woken earlier today to see her granddaughter off, and she sat by her house's small fire, gazing at the firebender "You are all valuable members of this Tribe, after all. Even if you failed to achieve what you set out to do, you would still be welcome and loved as you always have been"
"You're all too generous and forgiving if that's so" Zuko said "But I guess that shouldn't surprise me anymore. Not after I've been here for over two years now, huh?"
"Yeah. You should be used to it" said Hakoda, clapping Zuko's shoulder gently "Go, then. Protect the Tribe in your own way, Zuko"
He nodded and offered his hand to Hakoda, who clasped his forearm in the respectful gesture of the Water Tribe. The two men exchanged one more grin before Zuko ducked out of the igloo, making his way to the village wall.
Suki, Mari and Gruff were waiting there, Zuko's pack sitting at their feet. He smiled upon reaching them, and he leaned down to caress Mari's hair as she latched onto his leg with a tight hug.
"Good luck, Daddy" she said. Zuko knelt and kissed her cheek, with one last embrace for the time being.
"Be good to your mom, Mari. And to the baby, and to Gruff" he smiled "I'm sure you can do it if you make up your mind…"
"I'll try…" Mari said, with an unusually shy grin. Zuko smiled and stroked her hair gently once more before moving to the next one in line.
"Alright, Gruff. You're tasked with keeping discipline in this house while I'm gone" Zuko declared. Gruff sat before him, his chest puffed out proudly, tail twitching with hardly repressed joy upon being addressed by his master "And of course, you'll have to protect both Suki and Mari, alright?"
Gruff whimpered a little, as though desperate for some affection. Zuko chuckled and reached out to stroke the dog's fur, scratching him behind the ears.
"You're always a good boy, that you are. Take care of them, and of yourself too, of course" he added, with a small smile before pushing himself up to his full height once more.
Despite she had seemed so resolute about all this before, Suki was uneasy by now. She was smiling, but it seemed the realization that Zuko would be away for a week at best was starting to dawn upon her.
"Don't take too long if you can help it" said Suki, with a sad smile "And… don't lose your patience even if those three are a handful. If I could go with you, I'd probably manage to keep you all contained, but…"
"I'll try to behave myself" Zuko smirked "Though if Aang starts blurting out his outdated slang, and Kino says ridiculous things, and Katara picks fights with me…"
"Even so, you're to be the bigger person here and not rise up to their ridiculousness" Suki smiled. Zuko sighed.
"Well, I can't see why it should be me. Technically, Aang is the oldest amongst us. How old is he now, one-hundred and twenty-seven? Or is it twenty-eight? I've lost track at this point…"
Suki laughed and shook her head, leaning in for a gentle hug. Zuko didn't joke often, she had learned that long ago, but the happier he became, the likelier he was to try his hand at goofing around. Ever since Mari was born, he had started doing it more often. It was ever a sign that their family was the brightest thing in his life, and that he was finding purpose and joy with them, just as Suki had.
"I love you, Zuko" she said. His hold around her tightened briefly, and soon he lifted her chin to kiss her lips softly.
"I'll be back before you know it" Zuko said, with a reassuring grin "Stay strong and healthy while I'm gone, okay?"
"I'll try" Suki said, her brow against his.
"I love you too" he sighed "The next time I travel to Whaletail Island like this, you'll be coming with me"
"Curses, I hope so" said Suki, with a soft laugh before Zuko kissed her once more, with far more intensity this time.
It was over too soon for Suki, though, for her husband picked up his bag after a few moments and walked away, waving at them as his silhouette faded in the horizon. Her chest hurt upon watching him leave: knowing she'd sleep alone for several nights was, somehow, terrifying. Her panic attacks had grown infrequent by now, but Zuko's presence always helped her feel safer. His absence would be tolerable, she knew as much… but she also knew she wasn't going to enjoy their distance, not in the least.
She glanced down at Mari, who was still waving at her father's shrinking shape. With a sad smile, Suki knelt down carefully and hugged her to her chest, knowing full well that the little girl wouldn't understand her mother's plights or inner struggles… but the warmth and light that emanated from her was sure to chase away Suki's darkest shadows, just as Zuko's own always did.
Thawing the ship wasn't difficult, especially with Aang's help. Within moments, Katara, Kino and the Avatar had already placed their packs inside the cabin and were in the process of warming up the extremely cold contraption, with Aang lighting up the engine and using his firebending to chase away the frost that clung to the inside of the ship.
"It's on the small side, it can't be denied… but that should make it easier for the two of us to boost it with our bending" Aang said, studying the ship carefully. Katara nodded and smiled at Aang.
"This may just be a quick mission, but if we succeed at it, Dad might be more encouraged to go forward with our other actual mission" said Katara. Aang blinked and glanced at her "We had to stop all our planning because of the blizzards, but things were moving along in the right direction for it"
"Yeah" said Aang, nodding "I doubt Hakoda will be eager to let us take off to the Fire Nation Capital until the Tribe is in better shape, though"
"That's just further motivation to pull this off, isn't it?" said Katara, smiling proudly "I don't know about you, Aang… but I have a pretty great feeling about Whaletail Island"
"I'm glad you do" said Aang, grinning too "I'm starting to feel the same way"
By the time Zuko appeared, the ship was as good as ready to go. Kino waved at him as Zuko jumped aboard, relieved to find the vessel hadn't been damaged permanently despite it had been frozen in the water for over two years.
"Alright then" he said, stepping inside the cabin to find the engine was already running "It's time to go. You guys ready?"
Katara and Aang nodded and stepped outside. As he was the only one who had sailed this ship before, even if not too successfully, Zuko was tasked with steering. Kino would be their navigator, even if he didn't seem too confident about fulfilling such an important role, and Aang and Katara would take on the heavier duties of using their bending to bolster the ship's progress across the strong currents and dangers of the ocean.
Pushing their ship all the way to Whaletail Island was an exhausting undertaking, beyond any of their expectations. As they were nearly out of coal, Zuko eventually found himself firebending directly into the engine to generate the combustion needed to power the ship. Katara and Aang were bending tirelessly: at times both worked at parting the waters and at other times Katara had to handle the currents alone while Aang bent the powerful winds away from the small ship.
At the first sight of land, they docked and took a well-deserved break, only to take to the water again within the hour. The islands where Air Nomads had once lived would have been far more fascinating to look at, had they not been in a rush to reach Whaletail Island as quickly as possible. Time was vital for the Tribe's survival: they had to avoid wasting any of it.
It was by dusk of the third day that Zuko finally recognized the island. He released a relieved breath and eased on his bending, knowing the waters near Whaletail Island weren't as unforgiving as the ones they'd braved further down south.
"That's it, you guys!" Kino exclaimed, shaking the map in his hand "We've made it!"
Katara nearly collapsed of exhaustion, her chest heaving as she finally lowered her worn-out arms. Spending three days bending almost without rest wasn't remotely as fun as she might have dreamt it could be. Aang wasn't in much better shape, but at least he had it in him to rejoice at the sight of land too.
"It's already too late to get started today" Zuko announced "But that's fine. We'll rest for tonight and start looking for jobs tomorrow"
"You said we might find jobs at the docks, right?" Aang asked. Zuko nodded.
"There are two ports in Whaletail Island, too" he said "If, by any chance, either port is full up, we can go to the other one"
"This one's probably better" said Kino, shrugging "The northern one is open for commerce with the colonies and the Fire Nation, so it might be the southern port isn't as well-attended, right? We'll stand out less here…"
"Or maybe the excess of activity in the northern one makes it a better option for finding jobs? I wouldn't know" Zuko said, shaking his head "At any rate, we'll have to get ready for tomorrow. Though I think… I know you guys won't like it, but I think it might be better if Kino and I go first while Aang and Katara wait on the ship"
"What? Why?" Aang asked, raising his eyebrows. Zuko grimaced.
"Because I'd rather do some scouting first" he said "To figure out what jobs might be safest for you to undertake, where you might be less likely to be discovered as the Avatar"
"The same goes for you, for that matter" said Katara, raising her eyebrows "I suppose it's unlikely people will assume outright that you're Prince Zuko, but there's a chance they might think you're him, what with your scar and all…"
"And yet that's not less worrisome than arrows tattooed on someone's whole body" said Zuko.
"We could go check if there are any wanted posters" Kino suggested "I know Zuko's been real treasonous and all, but do we know for a fact that the Fire Lord's trying to capture him?"
"Actually… no" said Zuko.
"Then we'll check if there are posters!" Kino declared, smiling "And we can figure out what are the places with the most soldiers. I already have some idea on where they might be patrolling, but I don't know for sure… anyways, once we do figure that out, we'll know how to move across town and what places might be safe for us to look for jobs at"
"Exactly" said Zuko, nodding promptly "That's the best plan I can think of right now, if anything"
"Well, fine" Katara said, surprising the three men with her compliance "What? I can't come up with a safer plan anyhow, so you might as well do that. If Zuko does get caught though, you're the one who's going to answer to Suki for it, alright, Kino?"
"I… yeah. I suppose" he said, with an awkward grin.
"But for now…" Aang said, stretching and yawning "We should just dock in, and call it a day"
The others nodded in agreement, and together they got back to work, guiding the ship further towards the southern port of Whaletail Island. Not many ships were traveling around these waters, and as Kino had predicted, there wasn't much activity in the southern port. Once they found an empty pier, Kino took to tying up the ship securely before all four of them spread out their sleeping bags and rested as much as they could, in preparation for the next day.
The town appeared placid from where they had docked, but it was more active than it often was. In particular, the northern port was bustling with activity, preemptively so. News had reached the island a week ago about the visit of a very important guest, and the appointed authorities of the island's colony were frantic and eager to ensure their small city provided the Crown Princess with the glorious welcome she deserved.
The Barge was still around half a day away from Whaletail Island, even if its passage through the southern waters was smooth and steady. Their arrival had been scheduled for one day before the Blue Wolf's appointed fight against the Mist, and as they'd had no setbacks so far, it appeared everything would go according to plan.
It wouldn't be a long visit to the island, for Azula had very little time to spare these days. She had left the Enforcers in good shape, and the slavery laws had been finalized and would be issued out through the Fire Nation in the coming days… soon enough they would be making sure that the citizens would abide by the laws indeed. The first official operations of the Enforcers would be crucial… which was why Azula had decided to keep them on hold for the next month. It would offer one more month of preparation and training for their newly assembled forces, and a month to allow the citizens to readjust their lives with the new regulations. If they failed to adjust at all, the Enforcers would strike. That was the plan, and Azula was certain it would work perfectly.
She felt unexpectedly confident about a complicated, massive endeavor such as enforcing the new slavery laws… yet her heart had been heavy, and her nerves twisted with every traveled league that brought them closer to Whaletail Island. She knew she had no right to complain, she had agreed to this trip after all… but she couldn't imagine any possible favorable outcome for this venture, at least, not for herself.
For, if the Mist wasn't Katara, Sokka would be devastated. She doubted he was truly over what had happened with the executed slaves, and setting himself up for yet another massive disappointment was a terrible idea, as far as Azula could tell. But Sokka's self-preservation skills hadn't improved in the least, it appeared, and he was ever ready to be hurt and brokenhearted. Sometimes Azula wondered whether that was inherent to his nature or if it was learned behavior. She genuinely hoped the latter was the truth, for he could unlearn a bad habit just the same… but whenever she saw his anxious, nervous smiles, she dreaded it was the former. He couldn't help but hope, even if he had been let down so many times so far. And if he had to sacrifice himself for a cause he considered worthy, be it whatever it might be, he would do it without fail.
Of course, finding his sister was a worthy cause. What's more, Azula wasn't sure what she dreaded most: a failure or a success. For if it was Katara…
She wanted to believe Sokka's promises, she always had wanted to, but she never had been able to, not completely: every time he had claimed he would choose her over anyone else, Azula had always assumed his Tribe wasn't part of that equation. His fear of having disappointed and displeased his father had kept him from running away from Azula ever since they first started working together, but if his father were willing to welcome him with open arms, why wouldn't he want to run right back to his people? As much as he loved Azula, she knew he loved his Tribe too. He loved his family. And it wasn't her place to keep him from them, no matter how badly she wished to remain by Sokka's side.
Her mind kept racing to the worst possibilities: to imagining a life without him. He would be happy with his people, she was sure of it… and she was horribly busy lately, that couldn't be denied. This trip on her Barge had been their first opportunity to spend proper time together in over a month, and yet Azula felt distant from him anyhow, knowing even as they sparred on deck that his thoughts were elsewhere, just like hers, imagining every possible outcome for his fight with the Mist. It wasn't often that she felt something coming between them, not these days at least. Their conflicts had driven them apart in the past, but this time it was something subtler, something she knew she had no right to fight against. Something she feared might steal away the partnership she had grown to cherish above all else over the last few years.
The distance, she knew, was there because she had erected it in the first place. Because she had wanted Sokka to focus only on his future, to think only of his family, to not worry about pleasing her or reassuring her that he'd stay by her side. Whenever they spoke about the matter Azula had successfully kept her reservations and concerns hidden, only ever warning Sokka to not hope too much, to keep in mind that the Mist might not be who he hoped she was. Outside of that, she had been as supportive as she knew he needed her to be. She had sabotaged more than enough things in his life in the past, and if this truly were his sister, Azula was determined not to get in the way this time, no matter if the idea of him choosing to go back to his family was absolutely depressing.
It was dark at night when she spotted the first lights, far in the horizon. She had been sitting in her room, pondering how to schedule the raids she would launch with the Enforcers upon returning to the Fire Nation, but a glance through the window told her they had reached their destination.
She shivered involuntarily, and not merely because the weather was chilly compared to the Fire Nation's. She gritted her teeth, the schedule forgotten as she left it on her desk and walked to the nearest window. It was a small glimmer in the horizon, no doubt… but they were too close to Whaletail Island for it to be anything else by now.
How she had wished to never undergo the same plight Ty Lee had over Haru back in the Earth Kingdom. She knew, just so, that Sokka might stay true to all his promises, that he might surprise her the same way Haru had surprised Ty Lee… but just as it was better for Sokka to be prepared in case the Mist turned out to be someone other than his sister, it was better for Azula to consider that maybe she would have to let him go. That even the greatest of partnerships couldn't possibly last forever…
She stood there for a few moments, regulating her breathing quite consciously, to prevent herself from overreacting to her dark thoughts. Just as she was in the middle of doing that, there was a knock on her door.
She cast a wary glance towards her cabin's entrance, her heart racing despite her best efforts to remain calm. Of course it was him, it wasn't like it could be anyone else, not at such late hour… and yet she wasn't sure about crossing the room and welcoming him as she ever did. The constant, morbid thoughts that this trip might be some of their last shared moments had a paralyzing effect on her. It wasn't about her, she knew, not this time. It wasn't her place to act out, to make demands from him… so why was she so inconsolable? Why couldn't she just be selfless? The more this went on, the more unworthy she felt of him. The more she grew convinced that leaving might wind up being for the best for Sokka…
"Hey… you still working?"
His voice drifted from the other side of the door, so soft she nearly missed it, but the sounds of the ocean weren't loud enough in the top level of her Barge's tower to muffle out his words.
"I'm asking because I saw your lights, so… I figured I'd drop by to make sure you're not going overboard. It's past midnight, Azula"
She sighed, unable to hold back a small smile. Maybe that wasn't the only reason he'd come, but it was a reason true to his character either way. He never seemed to stop worrying about her, looking after her with more care than anyone else who had been part of her life so far. At times like these, it wasn't all that difficult to grasp why she was so selfish, why she was so hung up on staying with him: she could always be at her best whenever he stood beside her.
He didn't jump on her as soon as she opened the door, though Azula hadn't quite expected him to. He merely looked at her with that gentle smile of his, eyebrows raised as he studied her with uncertainty.
"I wasn't trying to go overboard with work, let alone trying to worry you" she said, with a shrug. Sokka chuckled.
"And yet it appears you succeeded at both things, huh?" he said playfully. Azula smirked.
"That's the burden of being me. I'm awfully efficient at stuff, even when I don't intend to be" she said, stepping out of the way so he could come inside "I wasn't expecting you tonight, honestly. I figured Renkai might be patrolling…"
"Rui Shi said he traded patrols with him, so the way was clear for me to sneak up to your cabin" Sokka smiled "And amongst other stuff Rui Shi told me earlier, well… he says we'll arrive at Whaletail at some point tonight, huh?"
"If you must know…" Azula said, gesturing at her window.
Sokka glanced in the direction she pointed at, and his eyes widened when he saw the lights. His mouth ran dry, and a sudden shiver rushed through his body. His reaction was visible, yet not quite as euphoric as Azula had expected it to be.
"Something wrong?" she asked, as he made his way to the window, his feet slow.
"I… guess not. Not really" he whispered "At least, not aside from the fact that I… that I should be more prepared for this than I am, right? But I guess I overestimated myself, or something"
"What's that supposed to mean?" Azula asked, with a crooked grin.
Sokka sighed and walked backwards, taking his seat on her bed and burying his face in his hands. Azula stopped beside him, studying him intently.
"You remember how I… how I didn't want to go home because I thought they'd think I was a traitor and all that stuff?"
"Yeah?" said Azula.
"S-so, well, if it really were my sister, don't you think maybe…?"
Azula sighed and shook her head before sitting beside him. Sokka leaned forward, his hands over the back of his neck now, anxiety eating away at him.
"You should know by now that overthinking is my area of expertise, and of all my vices, that's one of the worst you could've picked up" Azula said, leering at him. Sokka glanced at her, pouting a little.
"Not like I haven't done my own share of overthinking since we met" he mumbled.
"None as bad as I have" said Azula, smiling a little "Either way, Sokka… there's a chance it's not your sister. There's a chance that, if it is her, she's just desperate to know if you're okay, and that might be the true reason behind the challenge. There are more than enough valid and plausible possibilities, therefore, there are many potential outcomes for this crazy fight we've signed up for"
"It is crazy, though" said Sokka, releasing a trembling breath "I keep thinking now that… that I'm not ready. That maybe I should've waited a little longer, or… or not done it at all"
"And you would've forgiven yourself for that?"
"There's plenty of stuff I won't forgive myself for as it is. What's one more?" Sokka said, groaning and dropping on the mattress now "Besides… you had plenty of stuff to do in the Fire Nation. Dragging you away from it all, well… it's really wrong of me to have done that, isn't it?"
"I adjusted my plans so that this trip could happen without any real cost to the slavery laws" Azula said, turning on the bed to look at him "You know I did. The laws will be in place for a whole month before the Enforcers strike their first blow, as intended"
"Yeah, well… I still think it's shitty that the crimes committed before the laws were issued out will just go unpunished" Sokka muttered "But I know it's the best you could do so far. I can't complain, all in all"
"You can complain all you want" Azula said, with a playful smile "I'm afraid I can't do anything but listen, though. I pushed my father's council as hard as I could, after all"
"Either way, it's all so delicate and serious… I'm sure you'd rather deal with that than, well, sail halfway across the world just for a gladiator fight" Sokka mumbled again, his voice shrinking with every new word he said. Azula smiled fondly at him and dropped beside him on the bed.
"Sounds like you underestimate just how much I missed spending time with you, even if we haven't spent that much time together anyhow" she said "Still, at least we sparred a lot through this trip. I did miss setting you on fire…"
"Heh. Always so funny" Sokka smirked as Azula laughed softly "I figured with how busy we've both been with the Enforcers, we hardly had time to even miss each other…"
"By the time the laws are fully functional and everything's working, we'll have to…" Azula started, but she stopped halfway through the sentence. Sokka raised his eyebrows.
"We'll have to… what?" he asked, noticing the sudden, vacant expression on her eyes. Azula jumped at the sound of his voice.
"Just… take a proper break and spend time together as we want to. In fact, heh, your birthday is looming closer by now" Azula said, with a nervous smile "Not going to botch it up this time, absolutely not…"
"Ah, you'll be hosting that parade, then, won't you?" Sokka taunted her. Azula raised her eyebrows.
"Is that a challenge I hear in your voice? Because I could do it, you know, I really could…"
"Please, don't" Sokka laughed, rolling onto his side and wrapping an arm around her waist. Azula smiled and caressed his cheek.
"The play, then. I'm sure you want to see that" she teased him. His laughter only grew stronger, but he shook his head before long.
"I don't think anyone should ever even try to enact the kind of stuff we do to each other in bed, thank you very much" he smiled, kissing her brow softly. Azula smiled.
"Admittedly, it must be a lot more disturbing to watch it rather than to be involved in it" she said. Sokka chuckled "Oh, well. I guess the feast it is, then"
"That I have no reservations towards. Please do" Sokka said "And the singing lessons. From the best teacher, of course"
"Hmm. For the peasant you are, you sure have annoying high standards" Azula sighed "I'll have to look through music academies, then, and…"
"Don't be silly" Sokka smiled, hugging her tighter "I mean you, Azula"
"Oh, you only say that because you haven't heard proper music in your life" Azula smiled "All you know about is drums and dancing by jumping around as though you'd eaten too many fire flakes while walking on red-hot coals…"
"Hey, now, who's the one who kept up with me the last time I danced like that, eh?" Sokka asked, smirking "That's right, it's you. A very dignified Princess you are, dancing on par with the goofy Water Tribe savage, huh?"
"Perhaps there's more dignity to goofy Water Tribe savages than we thought" Azula said "Or… there's less of it to pretentious Princesses like myself. Who knows which it is?"
Sokka laughed again and shook his head, kissing her lips softly now. Azula's fingertips trailed over his cheek and the soft hairs on his chin, acutely aware of the warmth of his skin. By the time he pulled away, she wanted nothing but to kiss him anew.
"What are you really planning, huh?" he asked, prodding her nose with his own. Azula smiled enigmatically: with how hectic things had been with the Enforcers so far, she hadn't had much time to plan for Sokka's birthday yet. But she intended to. This time around, she absolutely intended to. Still, she'd do best not to reveal that to her lover:
"Well… what are you willing to do to find out?" she teased him, biting her lip. He raised his eyebrows knowingly.
"Now, now… are you implying what I think you're implying?" he smirked. Azula blinked innocently.
"Why, I wouldn't know whatever you mean. I'm only saying, that kind of classified information might come at a price…" she said, shrugging. Sokka laughed and shook his head, rolling over on the bed until he was atop her, still smiling warmly.
"You're far too clever for your own good" he whispered.
"Am I?" Azula smiled "As far as I can tell, you mainly come up here for one thing, so… how do I know you didn't just manipulate me through the whole conversation to guide us to this exact point?"
"Oh, because I'm supposed to be that much of a mastermind, huh?" Sokka asked, skeptical. Azula shrugged.
"If we have similar levels of dignity, or lack thereof…" she said, prompting him to laugh "Maybe we also have similar levels of intellect, despite it kills my pride to admit it"
"Heh. I was so sure I was an idiot" Sokka smirked "You never do tire of reminding me that I am one…"
"Ah, but I mean it affectionately, not genuinely" Azula declared, patting his cheek gently "Though in truth, you're just… smart for some things, quite daft for others"
"Am I, now, Lady Overthinker?" Sokka taunted her. Azula chuckled "So, I take it the same statement applies to you?"
"Maybe so, who knows?" she said evasively. Sokka shook his head and smirked.
"Daft, you say… well, this daft jerk manipulated you into wanting to fuck him, apparently, because he's just that daft" he whispered into a kiss. Azula couldn't seem to stop laughing "Here I figured you'd have higher standards than being with someone who's 'daft', but I guess you're just lowering them these days, eh?"
"I have lowered nothing" Azula declared, undoing his ponytail and smiling "I had no need to after I met you"
Sokka was startled by her earnest response, the color rushing to his cheeks. But her trademark smirk came back to her lips before long.
"A handsome, daft warrior? That's just what I've been looking for all my life, no doubt" she declared. Sokka growled before jumping in for a spree of kisses, amidst Azula's relentless laughter.
For most the trip they had been worrying about their own problems, their conversations often versing over the upcoming fight against the Mist and whatever might happen whether she was Katara or not. Azula herself had chosen to erect some distance with Sokka upon realizing most their exchanges would be related to that topic, for she was unwilling to let him see just how uneasy she was about the matter, how badly she dreaded that he might not stay true to his many promises. Tonight she had wanted no conflicts, no arguments… she only wanted this. She only wished to bask in his playful teasing, where his hands and lips provided her with no end of pleasure and bliss, his words often coaxing out further laughter from her.
Her fears would not be dispelled until the moment of truth arrived. Until Sokka proved he wouldn't turn his back on her upon finding an opportunity to go back to his family. If those fears turned out to be baseless, she didn't want to risk angering him for not having trusted him, when the truth was quite the opposite: she understood just how much his family meant to him. She would never begrudge him for it, let alone would she assume he did not love her at all, if he eventually chose them over her. As it was, her heart belonged to him, no matter what his decisions might be. All she truly wanted was for him to be happy, and if it seemed that his family might make him happier than she did, what right would she have to keep him locked down, held back, by her side?
If that were the case… if he truly did leave, she wanted to be prepared. She wanted to ease herself into an imminent separation, whether a permanent or a temporary one. That was the purpose, truly, of the distance she had intended to raise between them these days.
And yet, in a single night, he had pulled her back inside that whirlwind of blissful joy she had only ever experienced with him: all the banter, the affection, the burst of gold fire in her chest, everything seemed to indicate that he was the only man she would ever come to love this deeply, that she belonged with him, just as much as he belonged with her. How could she distance herself, willingly, from the greatest thing that had ever happened to her? How could she walk away from a relationship that seemed to be as essential to her very identity as her bending was, or her bond with her dragon? She couldn't imagine a life without him anymore, even if she might be forced to live in such a way in the future. He had changed her world, just as she had changed his.
Every high and low they'd shared had been essential in bringing them this far. Every moment spent together had colored a dour, bleak world where she had found no true happiness until she met him. He had opened her eyes, taught her more than any lessons her father had sought to impart on her, let alone than those she'd learned from Lo and Li or the Royal Academy for Girls. He had brought her to life in ways no one else had, and there was nothing she could ever do to thank him for it.
Just so, he gave himself to her once more, through a night that saw them reaching a destination that might change their lives for good. Was it the last time? How she dreaded that it might be. He thrusted into her: her nails would dig into his naked back while she kissed him heartily, her moans desperate for reasons other than pleasure. So high she was in her arousal, and yet all she could think was that he didn't know just how much she loved him. No, even now, he had no idea just how deeply those feelings ran through her. He couldn't possibly understand it, she was sure of it… for no words, no gestures, not even the countless nights of lovemaking, could account for how overpowering her feelings were. A lifetime of showering him with love might not prove enough, even… and perhaps that was what love was meant to be about, wasn't it? An overwhelming, uncontrollable rush of joy that seemed ever-growing and ever evolving, birthed from cherishing the other person for everything they were… from wanting to help them find and experience that same rush of joy, by whatever means possible.
Sacrifices might need to be made, Azula knew it… but a broken heart was meaningless if she could help her soulmate find every bit of happiness she knew he deserved. And as she reached the cusp with him, both climaxing together amidst desperate kisses, she knew she would do anything to provide him that. He had given her more joy than anyone could ever ask for: it was only right for her to return that favor.
Sokka was panting heavily atop her, eyes closed as he depleted himself inside her. His lips curled into a smile when he felt her kisses covering his face, the nails over his back relenting only to be replaced by gentle touches.
"I love you…" she said, her voice fragile. He opened his eyes to look at her, hoping the reasoning behind the trembling of her voice was merely excitement…
And yet there were tears streaming down her eyes, tears she seemed unaware of as she carried on kissing and embracing him. He frowned a little before intercepting her lips with his own, hoping to ease her as he had in the past… but the soft sob that shook her shoulders spoke for itself.
"Azula…" he said, looking at her now, but she merely hugged him tightly and pressed her face to his neck.
"I love you" she repeated, clinging to him, unwilling to let him see her tears anymore.
Making her cry wasn't quite what he'd had in mind for tonight, that was for certain. He sighed softly and rolled onto his side, but he continued to hold her tightly all the same, hoping she'd understand he had no intentions of letting her go either way. Perhaps by then she'd calm down, he guessed…
… For, as daft as she seemed to think him, he wasn't as stupid as to not understand what she had been doing as of late. What she had been doing ever since she caved in to his pleading and accepted that challenge. Her warnings and her voice of reason had been loud and clear about how deeply she was pondering the possible outcomes for his fight against the Mist, and yet she'd kept quiet, unwilling to admit what was it that worried her most. In a sense, he'd always known she didn't believe him completely when he promised he wouldn't leave her. Perhaps within a couple of days she'd finally understand that he had meant it.
"I love you too" Sokka whispered, kissing the top of her head "More than you can imagine, Princess"
Another gentle sob shook her, but to his relief, she nodded. It seemed she believed him when it came to that, if nothing else.
He smiled a little: on some levels Azula hadn't changed much ever since the early days of their partnership. She only had known of extremes, for that was all she had been used to: either people admired her or they feared her, and until she had heard the words from him, it seemed no one had loved her for good. He hadn't forgotten her reactions to his reckless affection back in Ember Island, as though no one had ever given her any reason to think she could be cherished for who she was until he had done it. She had felt abandoned by so many people she had cared about, even people whom she loved despite never wanting to admit it, such as her mother. The fear of losing Sokka was ever-present inside her, he knew as much, and there were plenty of reasons for that… but it broke his heart all the same to realize that she had been hurt so many times that, even after all these years, she feared he might just walk away from her as soon as a better offer came along. As though there was such thing as a better offer than her, to begin with.
She repeated her three words quite a few times over the night, and Sokka welcomed them each time, responding with his own. By the time the tears and sobs had stopped, Sokka assumed she was fast asleep… and yet it seemed she wasn't as unconscious as it appeared:
"Stay…" she whispered.
"I can't stay all the way until morning, Princess" he teased her "What will the cooks say if they have to send my breakfast up here, huh?"
"S-stay…" she repeated. Sokka sighed, assuming she was as good as sleep-talking by now, closer to asleep than awake.
"I've always said I would, silly" he whispered, kissing her brow "Do you really think you're the only one who can't live without the other anymore, huh?"
She sighed and pressed against him. He smiled, running a hand over her flowing hair, brushing it gently with his fingers.
"I'm daft, you're silly. What a pair we make, eh, Princess?" he said softly, before kissing her brow one more time "I'll always stay with you. Always, Azula. That's not a promise I intend to break"
He didn't expect her to have heard him, but it hardly mattered to him if she had or hadn't. For now, all he wanted was to hold her close, comforting her as he found comfort through her just the same. He'd head downstairs before long, surely, right before the Barge docked at Whaletail Island's port, so that he might avoid the working sailors… but for now, he wanted nothing but to remain by his Princess's side, hoping that one day she'd finally understand that even if so many others had turned their backs on her, he had no intentions of making a mistake of that magnitude. Hoping that maybe she'd realize she was more than worthy of the unconditional love they had nurtured through their partnership over all these years. Perhaps it'd take a few more years for her to see it. A couple of decades, maybe… or centuries. Or millennia, perhaps. As it was, he was sure their souls would seek each other out for eternity, ever returning to one another in any new form they took, and he'd prove his love to her each time, without fail, in hopes one day she'd finally understand how deep and strong his feelings were.
Nothing would tear them apart, he was sure of it. Not even if Katara truly was somewhere on Whaletail Island would he allow anyone, or anything, to pull him away from his Princess's side. Their lives might not have been meant to be so entwined all along, but the two of them had chosen to weave their destinies together, and as far as Sokka was concerned, that was how they would remain in the future.
And if that would make him an unforgivable traitor in his family's eyes, so be it.