57: Dedication/Desolation
Marie stands in shocked silence for a few moments, her face filled with pain. "d'Eon, why…" She trails off, gazing mournfully at Berserk Saber. Then, with a huff, she steels her expression, drawing up to her full height and crossing her arms over her chest. "-Chevalier d'Eon, thou findest thyself in our deepest ire. This despoiling of our lands, the butchery of our people, the treasonous alliance with those who would see our Nation destroyed! For crimes against God and the Crown - answer for thyself, immediately!"
"...Your majesty is truly too kind. To ask for an explanation first - but you wouldn't be Marie Anoinette without such forgiveness in your heart, no?" Berserk Saber gives a wet chuckle, blood leaking from her mouth. "-But, majesty, didn't you realize? I haven't betrayed you in the least. Because I love you. And because I love you, I can do what your kindness, your forgiveness won't allow you to."
What the hell is she-?
"Because, they deserve it!" d'Eon spits. "This ungrateful nation, of oathbreakers and scoundrels, who killed her Majesty and her children without a regret, deserves to perish! Don't you see, your Majesty? Kindness can only go so far! The people of France-!"
"-don't deserve this, d'Eon. I forgive them, for all of it." Marie interrupts, a bright smile filling her face. "After all, it can't be helped right? The world changes. That can't be stopped. And if France moves beyond even Louis and myself, it's still 'Vive la France', right?"
Marie continues to explain her point of view, and pink energy starts to flow out of her and into the Saber - I guess that's her Charm skill. But my attention on her words is broken by someone else's words.
["-Say, between Jeanne, Marie, and Gareth, we sure have got a lot of forgiving people in this group, huh Subaru~?"] The voice of Prelati echoes in my mind - right, we've got a contract now, haven't we? ["Come to think of it, which type are you? Personally, I'd bet you're a pretty vengeful guy - that's right, isn't it?"]
["...No, I think I'm pretty forgiving, all things considered."] I reply. I'd still be having trouble with half of the Emilia camp if I wasn't, after all.
["Haha! Well, I'll look forward to seeing it!"] He laughs. Tch, this guy…
["-That aside, keep your damn voice out of my head. It's making my brain feel oily, having you in here."] I grumble.
"-Enough!" d'Eon roars, interrupting our conversation as she blows the charm away with a sweep of her hand. "You can't say that! You can't call the Revolution 'moving on', or 'progress'! You died too soon, so you don't understand! You weren't there, so you can't possibly comprehend the hell that the French people created!"
"Ooh, here it comes." Prelati giggles. "To be honest, I'd really been wondering just how much willful blindness Marie had to the deeds of Robespierre's ilk."
"Everything! They corrupted absolutely everything! The days of the week, the names of the months, the calendar, the dates of holidays - everything they could do to erase the lives that people had lived up to that point. They abolished courtesy, abolished beauty, abolished elegance, abolished doubt, abolished faith, and then abolished the rights of all who wouldn't consent, be they man, woman, or child!" The Saber raves, blood foaming out of her mouth. With every word, Marie cringes, shrinking back more and more as the words carve themselves into her heart. "That was all the love the French people had for the White Lily of Chivalry, that they would grind it into the mud without a second thought at the mere prompting of a mad lawyer! They deserve to die! They all deserve-!"
"-Big words, from someone who didn't raise a finger against it." Mozart interrupts, and the d'Eon freezes mid-sentence. "Unless Maria has mistaken your identity, and you are in fact Cathelineau or some such?"
"-Th-that's! I had no choice in the matter! Do you not know the power those people held?" She protests. "They would have taken everything from me!"
"Which is exactly what they did in the end, no? You lost your money, your properties, and every single family heirloom, surviving only off dueling money and dying flat broke in some London gutter." The composer chuckles. "And where do you get off, trying to act like Maria's friend, you who volunteered to lead troops against her family on behalf of her killers? Really, there's not one thing that's elegant about you."
Fury fills Chevalier d'Eon's face, as her sword flashes free of its sheath and-
Suddenly, the sun goes dark.
No, that's not it - something has blotted it out. A colossal shadow, large enough to cast every person present into darkness.
An instant later, sound catches up and the sonic boom knocks me off my feet.
Suddenly, impossibly, at the worst possible time, the Evil Dragon Fafnir appears in the air above Lyon.
I, Charlotte-Geneviève-Louise-Augusta-Andréa-Timothéa d'Éon de Beaumont, have known humiliation. In some sense, my entire life had been a seesawing of honor and dishonor, humiliation and elegance. From a spy in the kings good graces, to a disgraced noble in banishment. From a friend of the Queen to a penniless exile. From a champion duelist to an impoverished cripple.
I have known humiliation, but that does not mean I shall stand for it. He must die. Those who mar my elegance must die. Be they France, be they Siegfried, be they even the friends of the Queen I swore allegiance to once upon a time.
Thus, I have no choice but to slay this cur in her company - Mozart, I suppose? He matches the description. In any case, I have no choice but to kill him. Even though my next blow is certain to be my last. But, Your Majesty, please watch me - I'll make it truly beautiful!
As my blade leaps free of its sheath, a dragon appears. By far the largest of those summoned, by far the most powerful, enough to perhaps overwhelm this lot, since Siegfried is dead. An ally has arrived - if I don't push myself, I might yet survive these wounds.
But, her Majesty will die.
Of course, holding back is not an option. My sword has been drawn, and I must slay this man.
But, my Queen will die if I do.
I could even use a personal skill to draw their attention to me and prevent them from blocking the flames - and in doing so seize victory for my master.
But, Marie Antoinette will die.
A devilish voice presents itself - honor, or duty? Beauty, or love? I made my choice in life - shall I change my course in death?
The dragon opens its jaws, blue flame licking forth from therein. Before I realize it, my body is moving on its own.
My Noble Phantasm, [Fleur de Lys], can be invoked in three possible ways. The first is an anti-unit attack, which both lowers the target's parameters and deals damage to them. The second is an anti-army attack, which deals no damage, but does decrease the parameters of up to fifty targets, and potentially stuns them. The third…
The third is also an anti-army attack, but its effect spreads over everything, no matter how many spectators. Even a dragon, or fire itself will be mesmerized.
It will come at the cost of my life, dissipating all of the magical energy in my body. Lasting only an instant, simply a brief respite during which Her Majesty's allies might ready their defenses. But that instant will engrave itself upon their memory, and not a single soul who beholds that moment of beauty shall forget.
"Please, keep your eyes upon me - [Fleur de Lys]!"
I bloom magnificently.
A/N:
Been a bit, sorry for the delays.
I'm not so certain about this chapter. I'm never super confident when writing mad rambling, I'm always uncertain if it's convincing.
Also here's a twenty-two day late Christmas omake
-This is a tale of something that never happened.
To start with, there's no room for seasonal events in a story crawling by at a pace like this. And, furthermore, the tone is way off base, and the story includes several characters that have no business showing up this soon.
But, with all that said, it's that magical time of year again. The same time of the year that the Green Knight Bertiak approached the knights of the round and tricked(?) Sir Gawain into cutting his head off(?) in order to scare Guinevere to death(?) as part of a convoluted scheme by Morgan to kill Arthur's wife even though she was putting her own son in jeopardy(?).
Yeah, I don't get it either. But it did make Gawain look like a total badass and give him a neat belt and axe.
Anyway, it's Christmas time. And as anyone who's familiar with FGO will tell you, that means it's time for me, the author, to violate all the traditions and magic of the holiday season, for the sake of comedy.
Grab a glass of eggnog, huddle under a blanket, and relax, with this heartwarming(?) tale.
The Santa who Judges the Sinners, Chapter 2
-My face is cold.
"Ah, Baru, you passed out again! Wake uuuup!"
My eyes snap open. "Wait, it's this again!? I thought that was just a bad dream!"
"Wahaha!~ Baru, you dummy - we've only visited one kid tonight-" Typhon laughs.
"Tonight!? It felt like an entire year passed!"
"-did you really think Typhon would be satisfied with that? Typhon is set on milking as many chapters out of this gimmick as she can, because she knoooows she won't get an actual in-story appearance.~" The Witch of Pride says with a mocking shrug.
"Please just send me home already…" I mutter, glancing over the edge of the sleigh to see a fog-shrouded city lit by gaslamp - I can still see Big Ben, so I guess we're still in-
"Our next stop is Victorian London!" She shouts, pumping her fist in the air.
"Oi, am I supposed to yell about the fact that this thing can time travel, or the fact that we skipped the entire rest of the Clock Tower." I ask as I massage my brow. I can already feel the migraine coming on.
"Of course Santa's sleigh can time travel, how else is she going to visit every kid on the same night?~"
"So it was the first one, huh?"
Typhon pulls her list from her pocket once more. "The next person we need to visit is Little Ebenezer Holmes!~"
"Ah, we're mixing random servants with other figures this time, huh? I thought the Author said he wasn't doing GudaGuda events though…" I mutter.
"Baru, breaking the fourth wall this much is a writing sin, so stop it, okay?"
"Sorry, go on."
"-Ebenezer's letter to Santa says:
'It seems I've been summoned to a rather queer singularity, and merged with another famous englishman to boot. Considering that we have already been attacked by the Ghost of Marley, Cratchit and I deduce that the rest of the Christmas Carol ghosts we encounter tonight will be hostile - with that in mind, I've decided to write a christmas wish, with the hopes that we can use it to chain-summon Saint Nicholas to our aid. Please help us, Santa Claus.
P.S. The usual "sugar" that I ask for each year would not go amiss. Ha ha!'"
"-Oi, doesn't that actually sound like a ton of trouble!? And what was that about-?"
"[White Whale, Compact Model] - descend!" She shouts with a laugh, and the sleigh screams out a curtain of fog as we dive through the choking smog.
We land with a resounding crash, smashing the cobbled street to pieces as poor White Whale-kun groans in pain again.
Slowly, I stand, rubbing my bruised tailbone. "Oi, Typhon, you've got to get better at landing this thing. I might get seriously hurt at this rate."
"Wahaha! Didn't you know, Baru? It's Christmas! And nothing bad happens on Christmas."
Of course, it's at the very moment that Typhon raises the flag, that she emerges from the fog. A beautiful woman in a black miniskirt, with poofy cotton edges and a green and red ribbon securing a black cloak around her shoulders. A black Santa hat is perched on her pale blonde hair, beneath which are her piercing yellow eyes. In one hand, she's carrying a large burlap sack, and in the other, a glowing black and red sword-
"Oh god, it's Arthur again." I groan. "…Why are you wearing a Santa costume?"
"I am the Santa of Christmas past." She says, straight-faced.
"Oh, good, here I was worried it would be for a reason that made sense." I mutter.
"Prepare yourself! [Excalibur-!" Black energy surges from her sword.
"There's nothing Santa about you! You're the exact same as ever! [E-M-M]!" I yell, grabbing Typhon and expending a Command Spell.
"...Morgaaaaan]!"
The wave of tainted mana crashes over me in a blinding torrent - but with [EMM] active, it doesn't actually touch me or Typhon.
I've faced this Noble Phantasm before, so I know. I know exactly when its torrent will end, and assuming she doesn't have a Grail powering her this time, she won't be able to fire off another quite as fast. And so, the moment it cuts off, before she has a chance to realize I avoided it-!
The blast ends, and I chuck Typhon at Arthur with all of my might.
"Waaaaah! Typhon is flyiiiing!" She yells in a childish mix of joy and fear.
"What-?" Arthur's sword hesitates for a split second.
"Ei!~" Typhon shouts as she impacts Arthur with her fist, and the King of Knights shatters into twenty or so pieces. A moment later, the Witch jumps to her feet. "Wahaha!~ Take that, sinner! How dare you attack Santa! Now all you get is Typhon's just- ehhhh? Baru, she's not puking blood, what's going oooon!?"
"Ah, come to think of it, the last time we ran into her she said she only turned evil after she was dead, so her intent aside, she hasn't actually done anything bad yet… or something like that." I say with a shrug.
"Mm.. that sounds kind of unconvincing." The witch says, stroking her fake beard.
"Kill me. I refuse to live with this humiliation." Arthur's severed head says.
"Oh, she's alive because it would be funny to carry her around with us!" Typhon slaps her fist into her palm.
"That must be it." I nod, picking up the Saber's head.
"You dare mock the pride of a Santa!? My fellow Santas will certainly avenge me!" She shouts angrily.
"It's a bold assertion that such a symbol of rampant consumerism could be said to have pride." A man's voice calls out as he emerges from the foggy night. Wearing a black overcoat, with slicked back gray hair and a pipe in one hand, he stalks forward into view, eyeing Typhon and myself. "...I suppose it was too much to hope for an actual Saint to manifest on this bizarre night. I am Ebenezer Holmes. If I were summoned normally I would say it was a pleasure to meet you, but as it is the only thing I can ask for is a profitable business relationship. Ha ha!"
"You said it anyway, just in a backhanded way!" I protest.
"An excellent deduction, though I hope you aren't planning on charging a detective fee. I can't abide a business rival." He says with a puff of his pipe. Then he yells behind him, "Cratchit, I found them! Get over here, you waste of coin!"
"Righty-o, here I am!" A blond youth leaps out of the fog. "It's me, Flat Cratchit, at your- oooohhh, it's Pleiades! What've you been up to?"
…I really wasn't ready to deal with Flat-senpai today, but here we are.
"Uh… I got involved in saving the world. And then got abducted by a Loli Santa from another world. We just got done breaking into Professor Velvet's office and nearly killing him." I say, rubbing the back of my head.
"Eh, so you finally made your attempt at killing the Big Ben London Star, huh? Nice job, nice job!" He laughs and claps me on the back.
"Oi, that's supposed to be a bad thing, you idiot! Don't praise me for it!"
"It's fine, it's fine! Everyone in the Modern Magecraft Department tries to kill Professor Velvet at least once. It's like a rite of passage!"
"What kind of fucked up school is- wait, that's a stupid question."
"Yep!" He laughs.
"As amusing as this is, it seems our next visitor has arrived." Holmes says, puffing his pipe.
"Eh? Who is it, who is it?~" Typhon makes her hands into a little goggle shape, dropping the head of Arthur, who lets out a small yelp.
"N-now, face your doom!" The Saber says as she rolls across the street. "The Santa of Christmas Present!"
"A shame then," Standing in the lamplight as the fog clears, a green-cloaked, santa-hatted figure glances over his shoulder at us, eyes sparking. "That the only ones who receive a 'present' from me, the Santa of Monte Cristo, are the good of heart! Kuhahaha!"
"Booo! Your pun sucks! Are you even trying?" Flat yells.
Dantes ignores him, continuing his monologue. "One such as you, Ebenezer Holmes, who deconstructs Christmas beneath his cold microscope, could never hope to overcome-!"
"I've already figured you out by deconstructing you beneath my cold microscope." Holmes says as a dozen large lenses manifest, shining spotlights upon the Count, who reels backwards. "Whatever your holiday business, I'll see through it… [Humbug, My Dear]."
"-Now, while he's blinded! Get him, Tiny Jack!" Flat yells, and suddenly a young boy is standing behind Dantes, leaning on a pair of crutches.
"...This is so embarrassing," The boy mutters as he runs a hand down his face. "Why did we get summoned like this? I'm going to hold this against you for a long time, Flat."
"Eh? Why is it my fault?" The Magus protests.
"Oh come on! You're the one who made the decision back in Snowfield that got us stuck together like this!" The kid shouts in response, dodging around a blast of black flame from Dantes and jabbing him in the gut using his crutch.
"Not the crutch, use your Noble Phantasm, your Noble Phantasm!" Flat yells.
"No! It's too embarra-" The boy yells, but he's cut off when his body is reduced to ashes by a gout of black flame.
"Ah, Jack died!" Typhon says.
"Alas, poor Tiny Jack." Flat shakes his head mournfully.
"...Oi, don't make a joke out of-" I start to say, only for another young boy to emerge from the Fog and whack Dantes's shin with his crutch. "Nevermind, he's fine!?"
"Kuhaha! You think such things will affect me!?" Dantes shouts, clutching at his shin and hopping up and down, tears in his eyes. "I have a skill that suppresses pain, this won't- ow! Ow, ow, ow, stop!"
He falls over as Tiny Jack whacks his other shin, rolling back and forth. The little kid, just continues the abuse, beating the Avenger over and over.
"Ha ha! My Noble Phantasm eliminates all defenses of its target. Foolish spirit, did you think you could face Ebenezer Holmes unprepared?" Holmes boasts.
"Guh- then I'll use my own -ow! I - ow! Follow a - ow! Path beyond - ow! Love and hate - ow! [Santa Château d'If]!" The Avenger yells, and flickers out of existence, a dozen afterimages appearing in the air surrounding us. A dome of black flame begins to rain down-
"Fine, fine I'll use it if you won't!" Says Flat. "[Christmas Goose From Hell]!"
"""What.""" Holmes, Arthur, and myself all respond in the same utterly baffled manner.
"Woah!" Typhon yells in excitement. "Baru, you told Typhon you didn't get Mabeasts here!"
A giant creature manifests from nowhere - a colossal goose with three heads and six horns, fanged bills dripping with poison.
The beast roars, a shockwave repelling Dantes's Black flames, and an instant later, its fangs close on his true body, tearing him in half.
But as his torso falls to the ground - "Not yet, I'm not satisfied yet! [Attendre, Christmas]!" His body repairs itself in an instant, and he flickers forwards, hand driving towards my chest-!
"-Take this, sinner! Hiya!" Typhon yells, and Edmond Dantes breaks into several chunks, spewing blood.
"Ah, he was actually a sinner." I note.
"Kuhaha, you think that's enough-! [Attendre, Christmas]! Edmond yells, and the chunks of his body stop bleeding - but they don't come back together, and his head flops to the ground with a thud. "Ow!"
Typhon prances up to it and lifts his head above her own, laughing. "Hey, Baru, look! The Kuhaha guy didn't die either!"
"Kuhaha guy!?" The Avenger's voice cracks a bit as he yells in protest.
"So we're gonna collect all three, huh?" I ask with a forced grin. "Who's next?"
"That would be the most menacing of the three if the pattern is anything to go by." Holmes says. "First we had the ethereal beauty, then the laughing man - and now comes the black-cloaked angel of death, the Santa of Christmas Future-!"
"Oh, do I get a peek at a future boss fight?" I ask, peering into the fog. Slowly, a black shape comes into view, and all kinds of emotions surge through my chest.
Eerily, she drifts towards us, and it clicks in my head. Of course she'd be here. Christmas is a season of giving, but it's also a season of Romance - there's no way she'd pass up the chance, is there?
Silver hair and purple eyes, visible beneath the black shroud of shadows surrounding her. A mournful look on her face as she gazes upon me, tears just barely threatening to spill forth.
Luckily, she isn't muttering words of love right now, which means…
"Ah! Hi Tella!" Typhon waves excitedly at the Girl Who is Not the Witch of Envy.
"I am… the Santa of Christmas Future." Satella whispers.
"Hmph. So you're Christmas Future." Holmes notes. "Then in that case, Spirit-"
"No, you guys don't need to fight here." I say with a sigh. "I'll handle this one. Oi, Typhon, can I..?" I ask, reaching for a certain item.
She's confused for a moment, glancing back and forth between Satella and myself, before realization dawns. "Ah! You're right, Baru - you take it! Mama gave Typhon spares."
"Thanks. I'll be back in a bit, guys. We're just going to go for a little walk." I say, walking past Satella for a few steps, and then glancing back at her. "Well? Are you coming?"
The Girl Who is Not the Witch nods once, hesitantly, and she follows me into the foggy winter night.
We walk in silence for a little bit. I've got everything and nothing to say all at once, and I'm not sure where to begin. And, well, she has her own circumstances, I'm pretty sure.
We cross a silent bridge, and a noise draws my attention to the Thames below, where small chunks of ice crunch gently against one another. Not quite able to flow freely, not quite able to freeze solid, they drift down the muddy water with a kind of lazy violence.
It's a strange sight, but somehow, it feels right, for a night like this. I glance at my companion, and see her open her mouth.
"...You don't have to speak." I say, and she closes her mouth. "It hurts you, right? To say things in that state, is painful or something. That's why you're so untalkative, limiting yourself to just what has to be said - that's right, isn't it?"
Of course, as far as her counterpart is concerned, any amount of pain is bearable, as long as she can say the words she wants to say to me.
Satella doesn't give any affirmative response, but she goes quiet. I'll take that as a yes, I guess.
"That's fine. All I'm good at is talking big, so I'll talk for both of us." I give her a small smile.
She says nothing, her sad eyes boring into me. I think, I really wish that I could change those eyes of hers. So, with a sigh as I glance down at the slushy water, I start to talk.
"This was a lot easier before. Back when I could just reject you, I mean, when I could simply say 'I don't know you' and be done with it. But after that talk in Echidna's place, I didn't want to be mean about it. And after Atlas, I'm not so sure what to think about the rest of it."
I pause for a moment, glancing at her face. For a second, it seems a bit confused to me, but maybe I'm just imagining it. "Ah, Quasar said you couldn't see me down there, so I guess you don't know what I'm talking about. It doesn't matter. I won't be going back there, no matter what Flugel had in mind. It's just not worth the hassle if I fuck up again."
When I died in Atlas, my ghost was trapped there until the world was incinerated - that was part of their defense system. The Witch hadn't been able to find me, and for a while I was worried I would be trapped forever. But when humanity was wiped out, the defense systems turned off, and I Returned By Death - is what I'm pretty sure happened. I'd really rather not think about other possibilities about my escape there, so let's ignore it for now.
"Sorry for pushing it so hard back in Fuyuki, by the way. That was mean of me. I'll try to be more considerate going forward." I sigh, and then stand up straight. "...Anyway, I haven't forgotten. About what you asked me to do, or what I promised you. I'm going to make it back, and I will definitely save you. You've got that, right?" I ask, pointing at her.
She says nothing, and it clicks.
"Ah, I get it. You can't hear me in the first place, can you?" I ask, chuckling a bit. "I guess that's what happens when you're in a seal a world away, huh?"
More silence.
"Then I'll skip to the point, I guess." Stepping forward, I reach towards her, and plant Typhon's Santa hat squarely atop her head. For a moment, I think I see the corners of her lips twitch in amusement, but maybe that's wishful thinking.
"Smile, Santella. It's Christmas, after all, so I'll give you this at the very least. I know you already said I gave you stuff, but I don't remember anything like that - so I'll give you this, at the very least. Not to thank you for your gift, but just because I want you to have it. I'm sure, that's how it was for the other guy too."
"I love you." She murmurs.
"...Sorry, I still don't know the right answer for that." I sigh, stepping back. "...But I'll figure it out, someday. For now, though - Merry Christmas, Santella! Keep your eyes on me - I'm sure I'm going to need your help a lot more before this is all over - but I'll see it through."
And so, with a wave, I walk forward into the foggy night, with the Girl Who is Not the Witch staring after me.
Eventually, after getting lost once or twice, I find my way back to where White Whale-kun and the rest of everyone is. The Christmas Goose From Hell is gone, and it seems that Typhon already got started on the gifts - Tiny Jack is leafing through what looks to be some kind of police dossier, Dantes is staring vacantly into the night sky, and Arthur's disembodied head, while still as obviously miserable as before, now has a plush lion leaning against her cheek.
"...I didn't take you for the type to enjoy stuffed animals." I note.
"I do not. This gift is insulting. I am not a child." She grumbles, eyes never leaving it.
"...Do you want me to take it away?"
"No!" She shouts, voice cracking. "A-ahem. That is, I shall not allow one such as you to take me possessions."
"I see." I nod. So she likes it after all, huh?
"Ah, Baru! Welcome back!" Typhon shouts. "How did it go with Tella?"
"About as well as could be expected, I guess." I shrug. "She liked the hat, I think. What about you guys?"
"Things have resolved quite nicely. Some time after you left with Christmas Future, the spirits of Scrooge and Cratchit returned to the throne, so now all that's left is myself and Mister Escardos." Holmes says, puffing his pipe. "On that note, since I couldn't say it before - a very merry christmas to you both."
"Merry Christmas, little Ebenezer!" Typhon says as she throws a bag of sugar at him, knocking him off balance.
Holmes staggers a bit. "N-no, like I said, I'm just Sherlock now - ah, this is just cane sugar. Tch."
"Let's not talk about what you actually wanted, Mister Rathbone!" Flat laughs. "Anyway, what did you bring me, huh? Huh?"
"I really am Sherlock Holmes, though, not the actor who played him in the 1940s…" Holmes mutters.
"Typhon already gave a present to little Jack, though?" Typhon tilts her head. What was the deal between the two of them anyway? It seemed like Flat used Jack's Noble Phantasm, right?
"Oh come on, he's Jack! I'm Flat! We're two totally different people." Flat gives a totally half assed argument, but…
"Hmmm… that does make sense to Typhon! Okay!" The literal child is obviously completely fooled by it. "Here, you can have this Steam key for the hit Video Game, 'Re:ZERO -Starting Life in Another World- The Prophecy of the Throne'!"
"Amazing! I hear it has a story written by Nagatsuki Tappei and illustrations by Shinichirou Otsuka!" Flat shills flawlessly.
"Hey, is this level of blatant advertising really okay!?" I ask.
"Hm, if I were him, I would have preferred 'Melty Blood: Type Lumina'." Holmes says, setting his bag of sugar on the ground.
"We're not getting paid for these blatant advertisements, you know!" I continue to protest.
"Alright, Baru, are you ready to go? We need to hurry to the next stop!" Typhon says, running back to [White Whale - Compact Model].
"Ugh, there's more!? I was hoping we'd end this series here!"
"The spirit of Christmas ne~ver ends, Baru! Kuhahaha!~" She laughs.
"...Hey, wasn't that different from your normal laugh?"
"Typhon took it from the Kuhaha guy!" The Witch boasts proudly.
"Speaking of which, what did you give that guy? He looks totally out of it." I ask.
"Oh, Typhon gave him some hashish."
"Even though we've been sidestepping Holmes's drug issue this entire time!?"