Disclaimer: Don't own PJO or the Whiskered Warrior.

Lunar Phases

Mischief and Merriment

Chaos.

The spark of life, the essence of change. Opposition to Order, enemy of endurance. Mortals believe chaos to be simply a display of disorder, such as a messed room or warzone, or a show of confusion, evident when one's mind races. It is much more than that, but due to the limitations of mortal comprehension, they could only understand it on a basic level. Even the pantheons that spawned from it have difficulty understanding its more elaborate ways. For Chaos is life without rhyme or reason. Chaos is.

December 24th, 2008

"My, my, my. What a merry band of heroes to stumble through my door."

The wallpaper outside the lawyers' joint office was peeling, the stairway was rotted and covered in moldy scraped carpeting that had been put in sometime during the mid-90s. The longer they stood in the hallway the more Naruto was certain there was something wrong with this retrieval.

Its irradiated from negative emotions. The Fox murmured in horrified awe.

The building or Loptemoff?

Yes.

Naruto was glad he wasn't the only one getting bad vibes from her.

"Come in, come in." The radiant haired woman with pale blue eyes stood to the side to let them in. Her gaze somehow failed to remain on any one of them yet settled on all of them at the same time.

For a moment, Naruto considered keeping the conversation outside the offices. He also considered taking Thalia's hand, calling it a day, and leaving the two Valkyries to deal with the rotten stench that came from the smiling woman. Her fragrant perfume was overwhelmed by the unpleasant odor. She appeared pleasant at first glance, but the stench of spoiled kale wafted from her being and made his stomach flip. Despite his assaulted sense of smell, he ultimately accepted her invitation and stepped through the threshold. Immediately, the rank odor of the hall was replaced by a sweet lemon scent. The office that the well dressed woman had brought them into looked pristine, and contrasted with the rundown entryway. A sterile monochromatic color scheme and steel furniture gave off the air of calculated, modern day professionalism.

Naruto hated it.

"Ma'am, about what you said—" Samirah started, only for the woman to speak over her.

"The proper way to begin conversation is by introducing oneself." Her smile glared at the younger Valkyrie. "For example, my name is Lee Noveran Loptemoff. Now, you try."

"S-Samirah Al-Abbas."

"What a pretty name." Loptemoff's smile turned genuine. "Did your father give you that name?"

Samirah went stiff and then bristled.

"It was my mother, Ma'am." The Valkyrie muttered through her frown.

"Ah." Loptemoff's smile became wistful and she began to circle the four of them. "She must be so proud to have a Valkyrie for a daughter."

"...All due respect, ma'am, but I don't know what you're talking about."

"Of course you don't." The lawyer sighed. "You and the Captain are here to act as witness to the Greek demigod and her lover while they write up a prenup. Interesting choice for a Greek couple to be accompanied by Norse heroes, but then, the times are changing if one is to believe the whispers of the Ginnungagap. Not to mention the deals being sent out from that Crooked old scythe swinger in Frisco."

Naruto tensed alongside the Valkyrie. Thalia, who was visibly confused by the nordic term, was also on edge because of Kronos' mention. They exchanged a glance out of the corner of their eyes, silently agreeing that this week was just not their week. He apologized for getting them into this, and was grateful to see a flash of forgiveness. The gleam of expectancy was a little unsettling, but he dismissed the apprehensive feelings before he clenched his jaw and returned his full attention to Loptemoff.

The woman in front of them was either an agent of — or worse, an aspect of — Loki.

The Norse God of Mischief was currently stuck far across the Nordic cosmos, bound to a boulder by the entrails of his own sons and being tortured by the poison of a snake being drippined into his open eyes. He was believed to remain there until Ragnarok began. During Naruto's time in Hotel Valhalla – and for a few weeks after – he did his research on the god. In order to influence Midgard, what the Norse called the mortal realm, the Trickster split his divine essence and sent it to deal with or have demigods with mortals.

Lee Noveran Loptemoff...Lean over and lopt 'em off. Clever. He fought back the smirk that his Y-chromosomes demanded spread across his face at the crude joke. Alas, he forgot to account for the X-chromosomes that also found it an amusing pseudonym. His stony mask cracked with a snort.

"Does something amuse you, boy?" Loptemoff asked, arching a delicate brow. Her eyes saw right through him and Naruto knew that the second he lied, she'd pounce like the ambush predator she was associated with. Hence, why he shrugged.

"The pseudonym is clever."

The admittance was taken for flattery and immediately appealed to the woman's ego, if the way her eyes lit up were any indication.

"Do you like it? I was tempted to go with Irene Cameron Weiner, using initials, but then that silly cartoon came about at the turn of the 'new' millennium and had a dimwitted delivery boy frozen by the joke," Loptemoff said with a sigh. She leaned against one of the desks and smirked. "I was too impressed with the mortals' wit to be upset by the theft of my first choice."

"…Do you know what she's talking about?" Naruto asked, looking at Thalia. She shrugged.

"Not a clue."

"Unfamiliar? Ah, but then, I shouldn't be too surprised." Loptemoff shook her head, smirk still in place. Her pale blue eyes locked with his. "You're the Impossible Child of The World. The boy born after a battle that never was by mortals who haven't yet seen the stars. I've wanted to meet you for a while now, my son's told me so much about you."

"Your son?" Naruto frowned. Her smirk gained a crueler edge.

"You bare his children's images on your arm, trapping that creature masquerading as a – blast, what are they called? Those funny little fox spirits from the Eastern shores of Midgard? Kit-soon?"

"Kitsu-Ne." Naruto corrected her. The woman smiled balefully at him.

"Yes, those. The giant thing pretending to be an oversized Kitsu-Ne. It needs to work on its disguises."

Pretending–?! I demand we eat this bitch's heart! The Fox sneered. Naruto's frown fell into a was the worst case scenario.

"You were speaking of Fenrir." He muttered aloud, hoping to jog the minds of the Valkyrie with him. The woman's grin grew wide with pride and Naruto's eyes narrowed. "And… if he's your son, then that makes you–"

"Loki!" The Captain of the Valkyries spat the name in disgust as her maul slammed into the floor and Samirah's axe was brandished, both had their ceremonial swords drawn in their off-hands. The confirmation had Naruto reveal his own axe while his girlfriend pulled her spear and shield out. Thalia frowned and looked at him.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but I thought Loki was a guy?"

"Male. Female. Feh! Such limiting mortal labels." Loptemoff, Loki, waved her hand and crossed her arms under her bust. She shifted through many forms, several faces Naruto had seen over the course of his life – even the guises of Greek Gods such as Poseidon, Athena, Demeter, Ares and Hephaestus – before reverting back to Loptemoff's appearance with a smirk. "Mischief can be done by both, so both are mine to do with as I please."

"Loki is The Trickster," Samirah said to Thalia. "Shapeshifting is one of the oldest tricks in the book. With it, Loki gave birth to many of the beasts that will wreak havoc during Ragnarok."

"Rag-in-a-rock?" Thalia frowned. "What's that? A party game?"

"It's pronounced Ragnarök, you uncultured brat. The biggest, most extravagant party of a year. Also, consequently, the last that will ever be held. The Twilight of the Gods." Loki sighed happily, before she brought her hands together in a single clap. She smiled at Samirah. "Darling daughter mine, won't you be a dear and kill your friends for me?"

"Ashrab mah al-bahr!" The young Valkyrie spat the curse and raised her weapons. "You have no hold over me, Father."

"No, not directly... yet. But then, I accounted for such insolence." The God of Mischief tisked and raised her hand. "Perhaps this might change your mind."

Loki snapped her fingers and the other desk, Cho's desk, twisted and warped to reveal a child's wooden bed, where a small figure slept atop a simple white sheet and pillow. Naruto's eyes zeroed on the inhabitant: a girl, no older than Annabeth when they first met, possibly even younger. Dark curls cascaded from her head, blue pajamas covered her form, and in her arms was a stuffed horse with a pink coat and bright yellow mane. Her brows were furrowed and she whimpered, while she clung to the toy in her arms.

Fear. The Fox muttered. That child is terrified. So much so that she should have awoken by now.

So, what, is she under a spell or a curse?

No idea. Could be neither, could be both. I deal with emotions not magic.

Dammit. Naruto's scowl grew more pronounced as his white-knuckled grip tightened around his axe. I hate Magic.

"You wretched cur." Gunilla sneered. "You hide behind a child."

"I'm sorry, but were you intending to initiate combat with this child present or was I?" Loki asked, arching a brow. She scoffed and investigated her nails when the Valkyries' Captain bared her teeth. "Now, now, Thorsdottir, don't try to intimidate me. You're far too inexperienced with your silly little mallet."

"Say that again once you're counting your teeth!" Gunilla grumbled, brandishing the squeaky toy hammer that had replaced her maul. Naruto stared at it. The others stared at it. Gunilla stared at it and then scowled at the god further. "...You think this is a game, Trickster?"

"Obviously. You're just mad because I'm winning." Loki smirked. She waved her hand dismissively at the furious Valkyrie and strode across the room. "Look, Tyr made the mistake of leaving one of his in New York City unattended. And when her mother fell at the teeth of a monster, a serpent of some sort I believe...Well, needless to say I am doing him a favor by watching over the girl. After all, he helped spare my son by sacrificing his hand."

"You were quoted as calling him a fool for it." Samirah refuted with a scowl. Naruto recalled the poem, where Loki crashed a party in a mead hall that he'd not been invited to. Tyr had stood up to Loki's insults and drew him to a standstill by not flinching or responding.

"Yes, a respectable fool, but a fool nonetheless." Loki rolled her hand again. "But that was then. This is now. If you wish to rid me of this burden, by all means, do try to rouse her."

"...Samirah." Gunilla glanced at the girl over her shoulder as she sent her maul away and sheathed her sword. "Watch Loki. I will retrieve Tyrsdottir."

"Yes, Captain." Samirah nodded. Gunilla strode forward to the edge of the bed and reached for the girl. She nary touched the child before she recoiled with a yowl. Gunilla clutched her now bleeding arm, the armor over it shredded along with the deep bloody gashes that were torn into her skin. She glared at Loki and the god smiled.

"Harder than you expected? Yes, well, I had to ensure Tyr's little mongrel wouldn't interrupt any of my business."

"Release her from your curse, Loki, or are you so vile that you must find joy in a child's suffering?!" Gunilla snapped. Loki's smile turned into a frown and strode over, growing in size to match and then surpass Gunilla's impressive height.

"Listen here, Gorilla, you will watch your tone with me. You have neither your father's hammer nor his strength to back up the temper he gave you. I am still a god. Trapped, bound, tortured, yes, but I am a god nonetheless." Loki sneered back. Gunilla continued to meet the god with an unflinching glare. Loki's eyebrow quirked. "Not impressed? Very well. A demonstration then."

She reached out and tapped Gunilla on the nose. The Captain of the Valkyrie flew back and slammed into a wall. Naruto flinched at the sound of the impact, and grimaced at the layer of drywall that surrounded her embedded form. Loki strutted over, hands upon her hips, and leaned into the dazed girl's face.

"Understand now? Hm? You are an ant, whereas I am a boot." Loki smirked, leaned in and whispered in her ear just soft enough for Naruto to barely make out: "Its no wonder my son led you on so easily."

Well, there was a lot of subtext behind that taunt. It would explain the anger in her eyes whenever Gunilla looked at Samirah. Naruto felt only slightly a little bad for overhearing it.

Thorsdottir bristled, her cheeks burned bright red and she bared her teeth. Loki put a finger to her lips and shushed, before she murmured something in the Giant-Speak, a deep brassy sound that was similar to The Titans' Tongue of the Old Times. A bright glow outlined Gunilla's body before inch by inch, she was swallowed into the wall, covered by the debris her impact left, and a two-dimensional portrait of her body appeared where the wall formed. The god tapped her nose again, a simple gesture this time and not a display of power.

"You'll make a wonderful fresco. Something Johann would make an opera of." Loki smiled sinisterly and turned to them. She clapped her hands together. "Well. There's the first attempt. Two more seems fair, does it not? Three is such a magical number."

"What happened to the girl?" Naruto asked, disregarding the god's attempt to make them dive headfirst into a trap.

"Thor's brat got too big for her oversized britches." Loki waved her hand. "Not unexpected from that oaf's children, but for a Captain of Odin's prized chicken wings? Not very becoming."

"That's not what I meant and you know it."

"Ah. Tyrsdottir." Loki drifted over to the bed and circled it, she dragged a finger along the wood of the headboard. "Honestly? No idea."

"You expect me to believe that?" Naruto frowned as the god met his gaze.

"Well, it'd be more fun if you did." He felt his lip curl and a growl rumbled from the back of his throat. Loki eyed him in amusement and arched her brow before she shrugged. "But, if you won't? Also, fine. I'm giving the lot of you three chances to wake the girl–Two now, actually. If you can recover her from her bed unharmed, then I will let you all go. If not, then you will belong to me. Simple as that."

"That's too easy." Samirah frowned. Loki glanced at her and a cold smile spread up her face.

"You know something, Sammy?" She asked as she pointed at her half-blooded child. "You're absolutely right. It is too easy."

The Trickster flicked her fingers and something shot into Samirah's thigh. She stumbled back and fell, clutching her leg and groaning. Naruto knelt at her side and looked at the knife that protruded from her leg. He pulled the blade out and examined it. It was as green as a leaf, but the edge gleamed like it was sharper than iron or steel. Another squelch had him turn to see an identical knife in Thalia's right knee.

"Argh, you b–!" Thalia's curse was cut off by the groan of agony that ripped out of her throat. Her spear fell to the ground. Her shield retracted to its bracelet form and both of her hands went to her leg. Naruto pulled the knife out and grimaced at the wound. It was already inflamed, and the smell of infection wafted into his nose. The blood that flowed from it was accompanied by pus-like substance.

"Ah, yes. That would be the poison made from mistletoe. I figured it was fitting, considering the date." Loki chuckled. Naruto glared at her while he helped his girlfriend sit up. "Here's something more challenging, Mortal. One chance. Fail, you work for me, the Valkyrie's will be turned into frescos for my office, and the Greek girl dies. It'll be tragically ironic! ...The Greeks still like that sort of thing, don't they?"

"What'll be tragic is your face when I get through with beating it into a pulp!" Thalia snapped before she clutched at her leg and groaned. "Di immortales! Why does it burn?!"

"She's got spunk. No, wait." Loki sniffed and smirked. "Huh, she smells like a virgin. Wow, given how randy her father can be, I'm shocked!"

Naruto ignored the series of puns and kept his glare locked on the god.

"When I win, you'll undo all of this?" He asked.

"If you win, but yes." Loki held a hand to her chest and smiled at him beautifully. "You have my word."

"No offense, Loki, but I can only take the word of a Trickster so far."

The air turned frigid as pale blue eyes locked with frozen oceans. Loki strode towards him, a scowl on her face. Towering over him, her features flickered, the unblemished skin becoming marred with scars the likes of which he'd never seen before. All the same, Naruto stared the god down, unimpressed and annoyed.

"Mortal, are you saying that you trust the word of that sand-crawling, silver-tongued businessman more than I?"

"Given that he helped me kill Lycaon? Yeah. I do."

"And what did he gain out of it?" Loki challenged with a smirk.

"The death of a Greek monster by the hands of a mortal he supported." Naruto wasn't raised a fool, he was aware of the game that was played over his life in the shadows. A mortal raised by the Greco-Romans and trained by the Egyptian and Norse? That was the makings of a hero's story that had never been told before. Something like that could fuel a pantheon for generations, akin to the stories of Ragnarök and Heracles.

The Trickster's smirk fell into a scowl.

"Ugh, Tricksters these days. Where's the backstabbing or humiliation of a hero when you need it? ...Very well, I shall give you proof of my honor that Odin himself still believes in." Loki tilted her head in thought. "Let's see, how did it go? Ah, yes. Bear with me, it's been a while since I've done this. Ahem. I, Loki, God of Mischief, hereby do swear on the River Styx that if the mortal standing before this aspect of me can rouse Tyr's daughter from her eternal slumber, I will cure the poison inflicted unto Samirah al-Abbas and...erm–?"

Loki looked at Thalia. She stubbornly glared back and while normally Naruto would agree to not tell the Norse God of Mischief, Magic and Lies what her name is, now wasn't the time to withhold such information. Hence why when she flicked a glance at him, he nodded.

"Thalia Grace." She grumbled. Loki smiled and continued, undeterred by her attitude.

"Yes, thank you–Thalia Grace...Oh, and I suppose I will let the rude Captain of the Valkyries go free as well." The skies boomed as Loki's broken and somewhat half-hearted sounding Styxian Oath was finished. The god held her hands up in a 'what-can-you-do' manner. "She'd probably make as good a Fresco as Thor did a bride anyway."

Naruto held the God of Mischief's gaze for a second more before he turned away and strode toward the child's bed.

Okay, grab the girl, ignore the pain and I'll heal it faster than this smug bitch can see it form. The Fox instructed.

"Not going to work, beast. An injury is an injury and the God of Liars and Cheats knows when a trick takes place," Loki said, picking at her nails with a dagger as she leaned against her desk. Naruto froze and looked at the god again. "Yes, I heard it. Æsir runes on your arm, Boy. You really should decipher them sometime. I'm always up to teach new students."

"Pass." Naruto drawled with a sneer as he stopped next to the bed. He knelt down and looked at Tyr's daughter. Her face twisted in a grimace and soft whimpers left her mouth. Dried tears were visible on her cheeks.

She's cried them all out. The Fox murmured. Another earth shaking growl ripped out of Naruto's throat as he glared at The Norse's Trickster. Loki paid him no mind as she continued her barbaric manicure. The son of Artemis looked back at the child.

"I have to avoid getting hurt, right?"

"Yes."

"And I only have to wake her?"

"Are you touched in the head?" Loki sounded annoyed. "Yes! Just wake the child without getting hurt, Mortal. That's not too hard, is it?"

Naruto thought of Gunilla's shredded armor. He looked at the Norse demigod. There wasn't anything that hinted to the cause. Just the frightened, slumbering girl and her pink stuffed animal that she squeezed every now and then before she whimpered.

Hold on… He frowned as he watched her arms. The tightening of her fists and her whimpers came after her arms squeezed the toy. That seemed out of order, but it could just be a quirk of the demigod's.

"Are you going to try anything sometime today or shall we reschedule?" Loki asked. Naruto sent her a frigid glare akin to what his mother would use.

"I'm sorry, Loki, am I keeping you from something in your oh so busy day of child abuse?" He asked snidely.

"Oh, cheek! Adorable." Loki leveled him with a dull stare. "Do try to be original with the insults. You're coming off very one-dimensional, kiddo."

"This coming from the god who thought a good prank would be killing his blood-brother's heir."

"What can I say? I like mixing it up."

Stop exchanging banter with her, Boy. The Fox growled. There's something else here. Malicious Intent is coming off of the girl.

"Oho? Did the doggy sniff out a bone?"

...We can eat her, right? Please?

"The indigestion wouldn't be worth it." Naruto grumbled as he looked back at the child. Loki snorted.

"That might be the closest thing to a decent barb you've sent my way thus far. Seems there is some worthwhile grey matter in that skull of yours after all."

The muttered insult was ignored as Naruto stared at the girl's arms. Malicious Intent implied the demigod was planning or at least conscious. If that was the case–Wait.

The toy moved.

It was a microscopic shift, but Naruto was certain he saw it squeeze the girl's arm just before she let out another whimper.

That is not a little pony. The Fox muttered. A glance at Loki showed the god looked annoyed. Naruto's eyes narrowed and he leaned in towards the toy.

"Clearly." He muttered. A hair's breadth away he heard a deep sniff come from the toy's snout and he jerked back when the pony's cartoonish eye blinked. He scowled and glared at Loki. "You didn't cast anything on her."

"...You're such a killjoy, Mortal. I was hoping you'd at least be foolish enough to try something before you figured it out." Loki grumbled.

"That's an indirect affirmative." The mortal rubbed his eyes. "Great. Judging by the size, I'd say it's the Scandinavian subspecies. Am I right?"

"You—What kind of mortal knows about these things?!"

That's another yes. The Fox rumbled.

"Oh, just put my fun in camps, the both of you!" Loki snapped before turning away with a pout. "Couple of fun nazis…"

"Wh–what is it, Huntersson?" Samirah asked. Naruto glanced over at her before he glared at Loki.

"It's a Mare."

The Valkyrie gasped before she sent her divine parent a nastier scowl than the one she bore prior.

"Loki, you are a foul thing who is undeserving of godhood, let alone life!" Gunilla sneered, covered by brick from the waist up. Clearly unbothered by the insult, but annoyed by the tone, Loki sneered back at her.

"I will smash that wall once it finishes burying you, Gorilla. Maybe I'll send the rubble to your oafish father in a flaming bag of goat feces."

"Whiskers, what's – Frick!" Thalia hissed as another bout of pain raced through her leg. "What's a Mare?"

"It's a female horse, you dummy." Loki snipped petulantly.

"Don't be a sore loser, Loki, it doesn't suit you." The Trickster gave him a raspberry. Very mature. "It's a type of demon." Naruto sighed and rubbed his neck. He frowned at the toy, half lost in thought. "This...is going to be difficult."

"It's impossible to separate an unwilling Mare from its prey." Loki sneered at him. "You could just leave her and walk away."

"That doesn't save my girlfriend from your poison."

"Oh, I'm sure someone up at the Chrysler Building would fix it."

"Empire State."

"Whatever. Both are tall, ugly mortal constructs." Loki sniffed and scowled at a wall to the side. "Should've guided those planes into them instead of those stupid square towers…Ugh, but they were such eyesores!"

That was something Naruto had to take a second to comprehend. Did Loki just admit to–? He couldn't think about that right now. He took a deep breath and considered what he knew about the demon.

In its original folklore, The Mare fed off the suffering of sleeping mortals. It would typically sit on the chest, head or legs of its target, preferring the chest to watch the faces of its prey as they slowly suffocated. The truth of the matter was that The Mare would infect the mortal with a paralytic toxin through its claws to keep its prey from waking and moving too much before it finished feeding. With a grown adult, the demon would only need a few hours more than the average sleep cycle to get its fill, influencing their dreams with nightmares to build their fear. However, with children the toxin was too potent and would cause death. Demigod children might have a better chance at surviving.

Especially if they had the God of Mischief keeping them alive to enjoy their suffering alongside the monster.

What's the plan? The Fox asked. Rip it away? I can heal you, but not the child.

"I know." Naruto frowned. He rubbed his face once, then twice, the act stimulated his serotonin as the emotional and mental exhaustion of the day – that wasn't even over yet – threatened to seep in. An idea came to him. He'd just have to sell it. Taking a deep breath, he groaned into his hand. "Ugh, this whole thing is such a pain."

"...Excuse me?" Loki scowled.

"This! This-this 'hero' thing!" Naruto threw his hands up before he sat down beside the kid's bed. "It's exhausting! It'd be one thing if I were a demigod, but I'm not! I'm just a mortal who, just two days ago, got beaten to near death twice! I'm tired!"

"Whiskers, are you—seriously?!" Thalia glared at him. He glanced at her, keeping his exhausted facade up and pouted.

"I was planning to go skating, Tree Girl, not get into a mind game with the God of Sore Losing."

"Are–I'm sorry, are you whining?!" Loki's eye twitched. She looked insulted. Bonus. "And–Sore Losing?! Mortal, I will make you regret ever being born!"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." Naruto yawned and flopped to his back. It took all of his willpower not to sneeze at whatever dust flew into his face. "Turn me into a trout or something, I don't care. I'm just gonna…" he yawned. "Just gonna close my eyes for a second. Don't wait up."

He closed his eyes, steadied his breathing, and waited.

Gunilla called him a few unsavory names in an attempt to rouse him while Samirah kept shouting the name Odin had bestowed upon him. Thalia was either quietly writhing in pain – which was bad – or seething and plotting his imminent demise – which was worse. But, more importantly: the bedding shifted.

The daughter of Tyr stopped whimpering as a weight settled onto Naruto's chest. He felt the claws try to pierce his shirt only to come up short. His hands snapped up and grabbed The Mare's head and his eyes snapped open. He looked it over. It was a small, tarish-colored thing. It almost looked like an orangutan with an equine-like head. The sunken, empty eye sockets seemed to stare back at him in bewilderment.

He smirked at it.

"Got'cha."

"Don't you da–" Loki's warning was drowned out when Naruto twisted his arms and a snap rang out. The Mare's head was turned a full one-hundred and eighty degrees before it started to turn to dust. "Oh, you impertinent, little–!"

"Well," he got back to his feet and dusted himself off. On top of the unneeded monster residue, the floor was not as clean as it appeared. Actually, the whole office was starting to look more like the rest of the apartment. Naruto looked it over before he crossed his arms and looked at the god of mischief. "I think it's safe to say I won our little wager. Not a scratch on me, and not a scratch on the girl."

"You…You!" Loki looked like she wanted to strangle him. Her eyes shone with unrestrained power and the room trembled. Naruto narrowed his eyes.

"What's wrong, Loki? Upset that your little pet got bested by a mere mortal?"

"Do not tempt me to go back on my word–!"

"You really want to risk breaking that oath you made? Have you no honor?"

The air in the room went still before pressure exploded into existence. Naruto felt his bones creak and his muscles wail in protest, but did not allow himself to show any weakness. He held the Trickster's infuriated glare with one of unimpressed, unafraid annoyance.

"…I will remember this, Huntersson." Loki hissed as she strode up to tower over him again. "You may have won this game, but you've made a very, very powerful enemy this day. You will regret sticking your nose where it doesn't belong!"

"Note how much I care." Naruto fired back at her, his glare as cold as the lands the god before him hailed from. "Cure the poison and get Gunilla out of the wall. Do it fast enough and I'll give you a two second head start before I tell The Thunderer he's got an infestation problem."

"You dare–?!"

"I do." He narrowed his eyes. "You're a sad excuse of a god, Loki. Once the right hand of Odin, reduced to a joke that must torture defenseless children to gain an audience. How far the mighty have fallen."

"Fallen? Oh, no, Mortal. I've only just started my climb." Loki smirked as her form flickered, betraying just how upset she was. She lifted her hand and snapped her fingers. A green mist flew from the wounds in Thalia and Samirah's legs to gather around the god's hand. The wall that had nearly encased Gunilla crumbled away. Loki cast the poison at the ground and the building shuddered, but she leaned in, her face inches from his own. "A day will come when my binds are broken, and on the cusp of Ragnarök, I will find you. Maybe then you will learn a proper understanding of respect."

"Bring it, Jötun." Naruto growled, not bothering to quell the deep rumble that emitted from his chest. "I'll be waiting."

"...Killing you will be so satisfying. I'll have to make sure Fenrir doesn't do it first." Loki sneered before her form and the rest of the pristine office faded away. They were left in a ruined, dusty and cobweb covered apartment.

Naruto kept glaring at the spot the god had stood. He didn't hate many things, but he hated the God of Mischief. Yes, he was ...uncomfortable around reptiles, and yes, he didn't care for those of his birth sex and he preferred the platonic company of females, but that was different. Hate was a feeling that he felt for only one creature before, and he buried his axe in that thing's skull.

"Momma!" The demigod of Tyr shot upright with a wail. "M-Momma!?"

…Hey, didn't that bitch say something about her mother being dead? The Fox asked. Naruto closed his eyes and sighed as a new form of exhaustion fell on him.

Great.

AN: Loki has come and gone.

For now.

Like a rotten toothache, Loki will be back!