The snowball smashed into Sahara's leg.
"Ow!" She leaped back. Brushed snow off of her shin.
"Sorry."
"That's okay." She crept forward. "I love your snowman."
"Thanks." He held out his hand—snowflakes landed on his palm. "See?"
She bent over, carefully touched a snowflake, which melted almost instantly. "Beautiful." She looked up to the light. Snowflakes landed on her eyelashes and stayed there, decorating them and landing in her hair as if she were a winter queen. "Reminds me of when we'd go up to the mountains sometimes and play in the snow for hours …."
"You can return the favor if you want."
"What?"
He took the head off the snowman and offered it to her.
"No—put his head back on."
She knelt beside him; eventually enough snow fell for another snowball, and he dashed away, and she lobbed it at him. It hit his arm.
He cried out.
"Ooh! I'm sorry—"
"Worth it."
She smiled, a little sadly. "I… can't really stay down here with you."
"That's okay."
She shook her head. "I didn't figure on this— They want me to… bring you up Above. It feels like a—betrayal."
"Where?"
"To Elena's."
"I'd rather go with you than…" He didn't want to think about Kent and Gleb. Perhaps they'd disappeared, as insubstantial as snow….
At least he had his plan… and he was in better shape, since they'd fed him semi-regular meals the past few days.
Sahara glanced wistfully at the snow. "Too bad we can't stay…"
"I'm glad you're Above. They've been okay to you, right?"
"They've left me alone. I feel like a ghost… they all pretend I don't exist—but that's lightyears better than… you know." She headed slowly toward the elevator. "I really hope Elena isn't there waiting for us. I'll stay there if I can. If you want."
"As long as you're not in danger."
The elevator lifted them into warmth and light.
When the doors slid open and they stepped out, two figures were walking down the hallway toward them.
Diego's arm was slung over the teen girl's shoulder possessively. Jason's heart sank. Diego whispered something into her ear, and she lowered her head. She wore a rather skimpy outfit, and her long, dark hair was plastered against her shoulders. Diego's hair was damp as well, and he wore a purple shirt, open at the collar, and tight black jeans. As they approached, Diego winked at Jason.
"How's it going?" said Diego.
Sahara gave him a cold glance then turned away.
Jason's gaze was drawn to the girl. She looked so small overshadowed by him, bearing some of his weight. Still, she looked in better shape than before, her skin glowing, her dancer's body adroit. Though her gaze was downcast, she didn't look the wilting flower that she had.
Diego squeezed her closer. "Gemma here loves to swim. Don't you, sweet."
She glanced up and nodded.
Diego grinned. "We're still getting used to each other, aren't we." He ruffled her hair.
Disgust rippled through him. Along with disappointment. So this wasn't an ally. No one who treated someone like a slave could be. What he'd done in the Cathedral must've been an act….
"Are you alright?" Jason asked Gemma.
Her eyes darted upward. She nodded, then looked down again.
"We've been having a marvelous time together," said Diego. "It's a bit one-sided, but that's how it is…."
"You've been hurting her."
Diego's grin widened. "Just a little. As an… incentive."
There was nothing he could do now… especially since he'd eaten only scraps the past few days… but maybe he could bargain for her….
So much for that bit of hope….
"Where are you headed?" said Diego.
"Elena's."
"I wanted to discuss some things with her. I'll go with you."
They closed the short distance down the hallway.
Sahara hesitated before Elena's door. "I… wish we were going anywhere else. Like the menagerie or the gardens…"
"Maybe we can later."
Her eyes lit up. "Hopefully. If she tries anything…"
"It'd defeat the purpose of… saving you if you get hurt."
"Well—I know how to calibrate risk. Not just standing by, anyway." She pressed her hand to the door, and it opened.
Vines hung from the ceiling. The floor was moss. Trees shadowed the room. He couldn't tell if it were real or just an illusion….
Sahara stepped inside. She touched the nearest birch trunk and lifted her hand away. "It's real!"
Diego and Gemma followed them inside. Diego nodded to her subtly, and Gemma looked up at the sun that was flickering through the trees and spread out her arms, spinning, her eyes closed. Diego slid away from her, arms at his sides, head bowing a little as if a great weight had settled on him. Or been taken off…. And the hard, buoyant sparkle in his eyes melted away to reveal wounded shadows embedded in them.
Birds flitted among the branches, bright snatches of color. Up ahead a sinuous form wove through the trees, gleaming orange and black…
There were perhaps other dangers. Elena might wait somewhere in the shifting shadows. He hung at the edge of the room and realized that its basic shape still held; there were couches at the edge near the wall and up ahead, beyond some of the trees, sat the kitchenette, stark and artificial amid the forest. The trees, he realized, weren't actual trees. Just an elaborate construction… for what purpose? Just because Elena spared no expense in her environment? Perhaps she missed nature… wanted to immerse in it… though it was hard for him to match anything good to her.
Gemma nearly disappeared up ahead, past a patch of artificial sunlight.
Jason took a step forward. Diego grabbed his arm.
"The tiger—" said Jason.
"She's met the tiger before, and they're friends."
"You were in here…?"
"Just once. Before Elena changed it. This'll be good for Kim."
"Kim?"
He glanced at Sahara, who was looking at him quizzically. "That's not her real name either. But she… reminds me of my sister, Kimmi."
A smile spread across Sahara's face. "I thought we caught you in a candid moment the first time." There was still doubt simmering in her eyes.
"The first time?" said Diego.
"When… the others left right after the treasure hunt."
"I'm pretty good at playing a part. But you can't keep a mask on forever, or it'll start slipping."
"So…" said Sahara. "You're… not treating her like a slave."
Anger flashed across Diego's face. "Even if I were the type to own slaves… I could never do it to my own people."
"So you're…."
"Part Lakota. I lived on a reservation as a child, until I… reinvented myself. I abandoned my sister… just like our father left the both of us earlier." He shook his head. "I was a foolish boy back then, but I can't go back…. What I can do—is get Kim out of here."
"When do you leave?"
"Just a bit more business—then we're home free." He smiled a little. "I'm lucky she's such a good actor. In my experience, most dancers are… otherwise this gamble might have fallen apart. We even have to act in my suite to some extent."
"But not here."
He shrugged. "If any place is safe to speak, it's in the tiger's den."
Kim returned with the tiger. Scratched between her ears and Enchantress lifted her head, eyes shut in bliss.
"I don't think Elena takes care of her." Sorrow flooded her face. "Can't we bring her with?"
"I'll ask."
Hope sparked in Kim's eyes. She introduced herself. "I'm not giving my real name till I'm free."
"That's a good idea," said Jason. "They didn't know it before?"
She shook her head. "They just gave me a random name…." Her breath caught. "The only thing they didn't take…."
"Not your real self, either," said Diego.
A baby's cry. It took a moment for Jason to realize the sound was above him. He looked up to see the lyrebird, Rhapsody, singing in one of the smaller trees, blossoming with white flowers. Then the bird made a cooing sound and Sahara burst out laughing.
The soft slide of a door to the right. A dark figure laced through the trees— glanced at them, then hurried deeper into the "forest". Nalika. Elliot followed, but Nalika rushed back a moment later. "False alarm."
"Bird again?"
Nalika laughed. "Yes." They headed to Jason and the others near the wall.
Kim shrank back against Diego, looking at Elliot warily.
"Hi," said Nalika. "You are new here?"
"Sort of," said Diego. "We were here a few days ago, but you must've been away."
"We were probably at Tamara's. Or at the menagerie. Kyr loves looking at the animals, even though he can't see them very well yet."
Diego introduced himself and Kim. She slid away from him a little but still looked wary until Enchantress walked up to Nalika and Nalika crouched down and ruffled her cheeks, then the tiger rubbed against Elliot's leg and sauntered back into the underbrush.
"What do you think?" said Nalika, spreading out one arm to indicate the false forest.
"Amazing," said Jason. "Why?"
Nalika shrugged. "Elena doesn't make sense…. I don't bother trying to understand what she does. But it's good for Kyr. To see what the real outside is like…."
"It's good for the tiger, too," said Kim.
"And the birds."
"I like that bird," said Kim, pointing at Rhapsody, who hopped to another branch and warbled something unintelligible.
"Me too—when he's not fooling me!" She laughed. "Hey—do you want to come over sometime? Elena's usually gone in the day. Then you can play with Alelu and Kyr."
"Who's Alelu?"
"She's a little girl. I know you're not little—but I bet she'd like to play with you. If you want."
"Sure!" She looked up at Diego. "If that's okay."
"As long as it's safe." He looked at Nalika. "When I'm away, she doesn't have much to do—our suite is pretty basic."
"Is Alelu here now?" said Kim.
Elliot nodded. "She hides anytime someone new comes in."
"Where is she?"
"She was good at hiding before. Now—she's almost impossible to find. We'll have to wait for her to come out."
"Maybe I can play hide and seek with her later. I'm good at hiding too."
A baby's cry echoed through the forest. Nalika startled and raced to the back of the room. Elliot excused himself to prepare a bottle in the kitchen.
"I'd probably better go," said Diego.
"No—we just got here!" said Kim.
"You can stay."
"I want you here."
He smiled. "Oh, all right."
A scream rang out above the trees.
Elliot's scream.
Jason's heart stopped.
It felt as if he were falling—
A strong arm grasped his.
Sahara beside him, a solid form amidst the mist. "Jason—are you alright?"
"I—" He gasped for breath.
"Just sit down. I'll get you something to eat and drink." She helped him to the mossy carpet adorned with flowers and raced away toward the kitchen.
A moment later, she returned with a water bottle, a carton of strawberries, and a piece of bread. "I snatched up the first things I saw."
"This—is good." His heart was pounding hard and tiny rainbows flickered at the edge of his vision, like what he'd seen during the baby shower. Just thinking about that day flooded phantom sparks over his skin. The dull snap of pain, the violent blankness of thought, that only shocks could cause.
He sipped the water and the world began to solidify again, become less faded and washed out. In the distance, Diego and Kim were walking among the trees, angling vaguely toward the glint of orange and black almost subsumed by the dancing shadows.
Nalika and Elliot were talking and laughing, their voices a warbling murmur.
Sahara leaned against the wall beside him, her arms wrapped around her folded knees. She glanced at him, a worried crease in her brow.
"I'm okay," he reassured her.
She frowned, eyes narrowed. "They've done something to you."
"Nothing unusual. Shocks… almost rape… nothing out of the ordinary."
She raised an eyebrow. "Rape?"
He wondered why he'd said that. "Ali rescued me. Again. Brought me clothes…."
Suspicion burned in her eyes. "Watch out. I don't trust him."
"Me either."
She pursed her lips. "These are some good clothes… I should've known Elena didn't give these to you. Maybe… he isn't so bad. You never know, though."
Jason nodded. "I'll take what I can get. Without giving them anything."
She flashed a smile. "That's the spirit."
Nalika and Elliot came back over, Nalika holding the baby in her arms as he drank contentedly from the bottle. Elliot glowed with affection, not taking his eyes off of his son.
They all settled down together on the moss.
The bird screamed again.
Horror flooded through Jason—but he was more prepared for it this time. Elliot hung his head. "Sorry about that."
"Not your fault," said Jason.
"Well—if I wouldn't have screamed so much—"
"That was… her fault."
"Rhapsody hasn't been screaming lately… I thought he'd stopped."
"Probably the commotion today," said Nalika.
"Maybe we should give the bird something it'll like better," said Sahara.
"Like what?" said Elliot.
"A song." Sahara closed her eyes and began to sing. A beautiful, haunting melody.
Her voice thrummed into Jason's soul. Bright threads of light bound to it, strengthening it.
A slight figure emerged from the shadows.
Alelu. She crept forward and sat down a few yards away, blue eyes burning bright.
"That was beautiful," said Jason.
"Thanks," said Sahara, beaming. "I… wasn't going to sing in this place… but worth it if that bird stops screaming."
Sahara began "Amazing Grace" which Jason knew, so he joined in, and it was wonderful to sing—he hadn't realized he'd missed it until now. The music vibrated through him, burning through his soul and fusing bright shards of soldered steel to it
Alelu crept closer. Soon she was huddled near him, her wild blond curls tangled with flowers and remnants of vines.
The door opened.
Alelu vanished like a wounded dove.
Tamara approached; she wore a dark silver suit, sheened by the indirect sunlight. Her heels thudded subtly against the floor.
"Hi," she said, hanging back a little. She slid one strand of light brown hair behind her ear. "I'm here for Alelu."
"You just missed her," said Jason.
"Hiding again?"
He nodded.
"I'd let her stay here— but she doesn't like it when Elena comes back—she'd hide all night and that would be pleasant for no one."
Jason's heart flopped hard at Elena's name. "Is she—"
"She'll be back in about half an hour."
He took a breath. He still had some time…
"By the way, Jason— you are supposed to take a bath before she arrives. Sahara—you were supposed to tell him."
"I… forgot."
"You have to remember every detail, or..."
"I—I'll do better next time."
"We don't want to have to take you off of liaison duty." Her eyes softened. "You want to be able to see him, I know."
Sahara hesitated, then nodded.
"I suppose she's deep in the forest again. I have some more cat videos to show her today."
A little face popped up out from behind a bush. "Cat videos?"
"Maybe we can also look at catteries. To see what kind of kitten you want."
"Okay!" Alelu bounded over the underbrush and knelt beside Nalika to kiss Kyr on the forehead. Nalika lifted the bottle away and the baby looked intently up at her, waving his little hands as if trying to get as close to her as possible. She kissed the top of his head and then skipped toward Tamara.
Tamara held out her hand—but Alelu avoided it and headed toward the door, leaving Tamara looking crestfallen.
"It'll take time," said Jason. "You've done wonders with her already."
Tamara seemed to allow herself a small tight smile. She caught Jason's eyes for a moment—then turned away and opened the door for her foster daughter.
Elliot lifted his son from Nalika's arms and brought him over between Jason and Sahara. They admired the baby as he cooed, a sweet, soft sound that tugged painfully at Jason's heart. Nalika went over to the kitchen to prepare supper.
"I… hate to say this," said Sahara. "But… for both our sakes…"
"I know," said Jason. "I've got to think of it for me, not for her. It's true I haven't washed in days… you've probably noticed."
She shook her head. "You'll feel better. Especially if you don't have to rush."
He trudged to Elena's room, which was decorated with fruit trees that looked enticingly real. Apples and cherries hung from twisting branches. There were peach trees and—what was that? A tree near the bed had dark brown fruit. He picked one and tasted it—it was chocolate!
She can build any fantasy she wants …. He felt the urge to throw the chocolate down but thought the better of it. Why not indulge? I'll actually taste it when she's not here….
He gathered a couple chocolates and ate them near the golden shimmering pool just beyond the bed. Fish flickered silver against the gold; a fountain poured into it. There was a little garden on the far side of the room with pumpkins, squash, mushrooms… on closer inspection he could see they were transplanted, probably from the actual gardens. The room smelled like spring, like damp soil and new sap, which was incongruous with the snow and the cold from the Cellar.
He ventured a glance at the bed; beyond the gauzy green curtains, insubstantial as mist, was a moss-green bedspread, flowers scattered across it….
He turned from it, and, chewing the last chocolate (caramel inside), he stepped into the bathroom.
The shower was gone. Just a massive golden tub in the middle of the room. There was a showerhead over it, but without a curtain or shower stall, it looked too exposed and cold. So he drew a bath.
He shivered, looking down into the shimmering gold, psyching himself up to step into it.
Worse than the Gold Room—an actual pool…
She probably did that on purpose.
Which is why I need to deny its power.
Control my mind— that's the only real power I have.
It's the only way I'll get out of this intact.
He stepped into the water.
It was lukewarm—he'd drawn it too cold and waited too long. He drew some more hot water and spilled some bubble bath into it. He wouldn't have, because it was too—Elena, but he feared he had waited too long and without any way to tell time… if she stepped in, he'd at least have something to shield him from her gaze with.
He washed quickly, then let himself relax, lying back against the pool. Its color disappeared, and water lapped soothingly against his chest, the tiny sound of bubbles popping sinking him into a deep calm. He took measured, steady breaths, just immersing in the moment of peace.
Beautiful images etched the edges of his mind…. brimming with tantalizing realness…. His family…. his home… normalcy just beyond reach….
A knock at the door.
He jumped— slipped and plunged beneath the water. Emerged, coughing.
He cleared his throat. "Who is it?"
"Me," said Sahara. "Elena's here. Distracted by Diego, thankfully. But she'll be in soon."
"Oh—thanks." His heart thumped hard. He slid out of the bathtub, grateful beyond words for Sahara's looking out for him, and for Diego waylaying Elena. If only he'd keep her away forever…
He dried quickly, and, still mostly damp, his hair dripping, he pulled on his clothes.
Snug and secure inside of the fabric that seemed tailored for him, he felt himself again.
Until he looked in the mirror. His eyes were hollow… the blue irises unnaturally bright, the whites bloodshot, the pupils dilated. He looked haggard and worn… his hair shaggy and unkempt, the beard sprouting rather scraggily over his chin. His collarbone was sharply defined, a rib showing subtly just beneath it.
He looked away, feeling out of step with himself, but at the same time felt oddly comforted.
Perhaps she won't be attracted to me in this form.
Diego, with his blazing vibrance, smooth good looks… he might draw her away.
But he doesn't deserve that. Especially if he doesn't want it.
Something seriously wrong with only wanting the people who reject you… feeling like you have to possess everyone… because no one in their right mind would ever want anyone else…
He stepped out into the bedroom.
His heart stopped.
Elena was there, waiting for him.