Painkiller, Three Days Grace

You know you need a fix when you fall down
You know you need to find a way
To get you through another day
Let me be the one to numb you out
Let me be the one to hold you
Never gonna let you get away

The shoulder you cry on
The dose that you die on

I, I can be your painkiller, killer, killer
You'll love me 'til it's all over, over
'Cause I'm the shoulder you cry on
The dose that you die on
I, I can be your painkiller, killer, killer

Dumbledore and Grindelwald- the Truth at Last?

EXCLUSIVE EXTRACT FROM THE UPCOMING BIOGRAPHY OF ALBUS DUMBLEDORE!

"The Dumbledore family, left to right: Albus; Percival, holding newborn Ariana; Kendra; and Aberforth"

…In her tell-all interview with Bathilda Bagshot,

featured in the full-length biography, The Life and Lies of

Albus Dumbledore (Available now in all reputable booksellers),

It is made irrefutably clear that the Hogwarts

headmaster himself was a supporter of Grindelwald

at the beginning of his reign of terror, but that is not

the least of it, readers. Reputable sources claim that

Grindelwald and Dumbledore were "Closer than brothers".

Would some say, lovers? Bagshot tells that the two meddling

in the dark arts caused the death of

Albus Dumbledore's younger sister, Ariana, an Obscurus…

"Oh…" Harry said.

Tom was silent, scanning the article then picking up another.

Harry Potter: "Deranged and Deadly"

SHOCK AND TERROR AT HOGWARTS SCHOOL OF WITCHCRAFT AND WIZARDRY

On the morning of June 14, Ministry officials and Aurors

were called to the school to investigate the sudden deaths

of three students, as yet unidentified to the media. While the

cause of death remains unclear, several

students claimed that an unknown

but extensive curse originated from none other

than Harry James Potter in the Great Hall.

Those students who were interviewed appeared despondent

and gravely ill as they reported they witnessed the

Boy Who Lived overwhelm the Saturday morning feast with-

Harry put that one down, feeling sick.

Potter: Murderous Fugitive or Imperioed Hostage? Whereabouts Unknown

RUMORS ABOUND AS THE BOY-WHO-LIVED STILL AT LARGE

…Some sources say that there is no way that

Harry Potter could possibly have summoned such a nasty curse,

dear readers, but as you know, I am familiar with the Chosen One.

When first I interviewed him on the eve of his trials in the

Tri-wizard Tournament, his asinine nature and slippery behaviour were

already plain. The darkness in his eyes quite nearly overwhelmed

me then, but as ever I must-

"Ugh," Harry threw it and the rest aside, pushing the clippings off the bed he'd summoned in the Room of Requirement, onto the floor, "I thought my eyes were swimming with the ghosts of my dead parents or whatever."

"…That stuff about Grindelwald and Dumbledore, do you think it's true?" Harry continued. He got up as he spoke, unable to sleep. He left the cloak in his bag as he broke curfew.

"It fits. Voldemort seemed to know…?" Tom asked in Parseltongue.

Harry thought about Nurmengard and the way the Dark Lord had spoken to Grindelwald. The things Dumbledore said about the lure of the darker arts before…

"Yeah… He seemed to know."

He walked past at least twelve masked Death Eaters without a word, and they ignored him in turn as he wandered through the castle in the dead of the night, out onto the grounds. He turned to look back at the castle and startled when he realised that Cassiopeia had been silently following him.

"Oh, don't mind me," she called when she noticed him notice her.

"I needed to talk to you anyway," Tom said, slowing his pace until she came to walk beside him.

"Escaping?" She asked.

"Would be nice," Harry said.

"Our magical core is still… I will call it unpredictable," Tom began.

"And?"

"It is not suitable to use the curse after torturing half of the student body with it. The backlash is already- it is uncomfortable. Other spellcraft is proving difficult."

"And have you been practising?"

'Good question, have we been practising?' Tom asked in their head, annoyed.

He wanted to be blasting like a supernova every minute of every day, to push the limits of their capabilities, see how far they could go, what they could do. Harry was less convinced. He still couldn't come to terms with the way the curse made him feel, bad enough that it was a necessity, worse that it was the only thing that seemed to respond readily, appropriately, predictably.

"No," Harry eventually bit out.

"And why not? What would have me do about it?"

"For starters, I'm going to need you to let the professors know that I'm not going to be doing any casting," Harry said, then Tom said, "I am going to run."

He dropped Harry's bag and took off his outer robe while Harry corrected his sleeves needlessly.

She ran alongside him, keeping his pace, nearly skipping, "Well I think that you should be working to correct whatever the hell is wrong with you as soon as possible."

"I agree. Unfortunately, I am in… Two minds about it," Tom said.

"I have some news for you too. Hooch vanished the day the students arrived, and Slughorn is- well. He appears to be somewhat of a weak link. There are several issues with the staffing. Tom is busy, and he's not planning on being here. But he's asked that I tell you all these things like I'm an owl."

"What… Is wrong with him, Cassiopeia?" Tom stopped to ask, slightly breathless, "Why… He did not appreciate Harry before all of this, I know, but this is beyond that-" Tom stopped talking and rolled his eyes at the look on her face.

"Aw, everyone's least favourite boy," she said, patting him on the cheek, making Tom narrow his eyes.

"So, he's said to expect new professors. Bring your recommendations to me and I'll bring his to you," she sighed heavily as she spoke, "We may also need to replace Pomfrey, but there's the issue of distinctly lacking healers."

"What happened to Bellatrix Lestrange?" Tom asked suddenly, randomly.

Harry could seldom follow Tom's train of thought, but he was beginning to find he could hide almost none of his.

'It should be obvious why,' Tom thought.

"Oh, blergh," Cassiopeia said, dramatically gagging, "You don't remember? Oh, classic, actually. Well first," she laughed, interrupting herself, "First she got gross, I mean she was always a bit gross by any accord, but apparently when Tom lost his lizard face… Ooo boy," she cleared her throat and giggled again, "Anyway, he wasn't very… Into it. And then you show up at the manor and oh my god she goes insane. Insane? She went into your room, and you nearly killed her. We don't know what she tried to do in those few seconds while you were all messed up and unconscious, or what you did in return, but by the time we got there she was twitching on the floor, gone blue, Narcissa was screaming so loud, and you were pulling a full exorcist; foaming at the mouth," she pulled a face that Harry guessed was supposed to be imitating him, "Anyway, Tom had to send her off -shortly after we realised we could just manage the wards without her- far away from him and you."

"Oh," Harry said, while Tom was thrilled at getting an answer from her.

"Sun-up soon. I'll see you tonight for Defence," she said as she floated back across the grounds toward the castle.

Tom resumed sprinting at full speed.

'We should probably talk to Slughorn. So he doesn't get himself killed,' Harry thought.

'Fine, if you insist,' Tom replied, but he didn't stop, he kept running until they couldn't breathe before he pulled the map out to locate Slughorn.

He was in his office, and Harry chewed his tongue, debating. He collected his bag and was glad the clothing Narcissa had supplied for him were charmed to be dirt and sweat-resistant while his magic was practically useless.

'Not useless. You are being useless.'

'Shut up,' Harry thought, then, 'Wait, you said it should be obvious why I can't- Why I can't really tell what you're thinking or feeling unless you-'

'Unless I allow you?'

'Yeah.'

'You are aware that I am one of, if not the most skilled Occlumens and Legilimens alive?'

'Oh, uh, I mean people say that- you're good at it, yeah.'

'I am 'good at it,'' he threw Harry's robe on, the charms immediately cooling him off, 'I tried it on Dumbledore when I first met him. Though I had no idea what I was doing, he swatted me away like a fly.'

'Did you really?'

'Bizarre that that surprises you.'

By then they were in the castle and Harry was moving to the dungeons to warn the potions master.

'You were ten years old,' Harry thought.

'Yes. And I wanted to know what he was thinking. If what he was saying was true.'

Harry thought about it as he moved through the corridors, light starting to flood the halls. Dumbledore saw a highly skilled, distrusting orphan and… Didn't do much to help. Actively hindered and feigned indignant shock when the child became a-

'If you are about to think 'monster' I will drop you screaming to your knees right here.'

'No,' Harry swallowed and walked faster into the depths of the castle.

Unlike the last time he'd barged into the potions' quarters unannounced, it was fully locked and warded.

'Oh, should we just knock?'

Tom summoned the curse instead, engulfing his left arm, testing the wards and the door.

'Alarms, a couple of traps. Locks. None of these are very…' Tom paused to shatter the alarm wards first, '…Good. Would you stop complaining all the damn time.'

Harry had been about to complain but wasn't actively complaining yet, 'I wasn't even… And it's not like I shouldn't have a say in it-'

'You enjoy it.'

'Would you stop saying that it's not true. You enjoy it.'

'I do. So,' he broke the trap wards and brought the curse higher up his arm for no reason, up to his neck, making his heart sink, 'Do you.'

'No, it's you. Hurry up and finish the door.'

'When you ask for it,' Tom broke one more ward, Harry knew they could be working faster, 'What do you want? What do you feel?'

'It's a distraction. I don't ask for it for any other… Reason,' Harry's heart felt like it was about to fall out, the familiar ripping pain was clouding his head and sharpening his focus all at once, blurring the edges while the centre became a razor, 'Enough, please.'

'…Liar. Don't worry,' Tom broke the rest of the wards and finally released him, 'I wouldn't tell a soul.'

Tom pushed the door open while Harry's hands shook. He was irritated with the way he kept needling about the curse.

'…I'm not lying, I hate it,' his stomach did a flip as he thought it and he wondered why.

"Professor Slughorn?" Tom called, purposefully tripping a silent alarm in the classroom.

Immediately there was yelling in the office, so Harry called out to him again. He burst through the door already in robes, over the top of his pyjamas, wand in hand and hair ridiculous.

"Oh, Harry! Don't move, Harry, there's several traps. How did you get in-"

"Professor, what do you plan to do?" Tom asked, arms crossed behind his back.

"I'm sorry?"

"What do you plan to do, now, that the Dark Lord Voldemort has taken Hogwarts and the Ministry?" Tom expanded the question, tone neutral, "Will you… Be a hero, Sir?"

"Harry? I've been meaning to talk to you, there were whispers… That you were in the castle, but I rather thought that it would be strange, for you to arrive the same day… As-"

"Are you in contact with the Order of the Phoenix, Professor Slughorn?" He asked.

"…I can- if you need someone… to reach out to them-"

"No, Horace. I think you should pack your things and leave the castle," he told him.

"…Harry?" The man looked crestfallen.

"You are not heroic, and the battle here is lost. They know you are in contact with the Order, and it is only a matter of time…"

Slughorn was already moving, ransacking his office, so they left him to escape.

'Why don't you ever summon it yourself?' Tom asked, distracting him from Herbology with the Hufflepuffs.

'What? The curse?'

'…Yes, Harry the curse.'

'I… Don't know it kind of feels like your thing now and I- hate it,' Harry knew as soon as he thought it, he'd started the argument all over again.

"Professor Sprout, I really think that Lavender and Parvatti should be excused," Hermione said, interrupting his would-be thought debate. He looked at them and realized that they were both crying, Lavender making very pointed eye contact with him.

"No, no need, professor. I'll go," Harry said, already moving toward the door. No one stopped him.

He was back inside the castle, lost in his head, beyond frustrated with himself; wanting to tear out of his skin, when he realised that Hermione had followed him at a distance with her wand drawn. He turned to face her, already agitated and aware of the two Death Eaters silently watching the altercation, guarding the door.

"Don't! Don't even say whatever you're about to say, it's all been lies for months!" She half hissed, half shouted; stepping closer to him, pointing her wand at his chest as she grasped his shirt.

"We need to go. We need to find the- we need to find our people and we need to do it today, Harry. I don't know what's wrong with you but you're the only one who can stop-" she was trying to whisper, far enough away that maybe they might not hear what she was insinuating, but close enough to be concerning.

Harry had gone still in her grip, heart beating fast as he withstood Tom's immediate rage at her drawing her wand and grabbing him.

"Hermione, we aren't going anywhere."

Tom forcefully removed her hand and stepped backward while Harry spoke, not using the curse at his request and only for that reason.

"What? Why?!"

"Go back to class, okay? It's over. It's all over."

"Why do you keep talking like he's… like he won-"

"Hermione?" Harry stepped toward one of the Dark Lord's followers, startling whoever was under the mask, "Hello mister Death Eater, here at my school; owned by your Dark Overlord Voldemort, how are you this fine morning?"

"Er, good, thanks," the Death Eater said, before the other one shushed him.

"Because he did," he'd turned away and left her then, gasping in the hallway for a very moment before she scurried back toward the greenhouse.

He'd skipped the rest of his classes, feeling more like an anomaly than he had before; uncomfortable with the thought that he was making people cry with his presence alone, annoyed with Hermione, annoyed with himself for being annoyed at Hermione. She, in a somewhat misguided way, was trying to fix his mess. She just didn't know how massive it really was. He felt like he was worlds away from Hermione and Ginny even when he was looking right at them.

He'd asked Dobby to bring him a late lunch while Tom pestered him into at least going to Defence Against the Dark Arts, held after dinner on account of the vampiric professor. There was something else on Tom's mind, but as usual, Harry only got incomprehensible glimpses, nothing solid.

'What?' He finally asked.

'I want to see the mark.'

"What? No. I don't want to- I don't want to see it."

"You are not curious? He did not use the usual incantation for the Dark Mark, you know," Tom whispered in Parseltongue, already creeping his sleeve up.

"I- no- what did he use? What does that mean?"

"I don't know," he lifted Harry's arm and sucked in a breath at the sight of it; the serpent squeezing through the skull. His face was strangely hot.

Tom summoned the curse without warning, snaking up his arm toward the mark until Harry sat up, cancelled it, and yanked his sleeve back down.

"What is wrong with you?" He hissed, heart hammering.

Tom didn't answer him, instead, he was suddenly, bizarrely, openly thinking about Cho Chang.

"What?" Harry repeated.

"Why did you not pursue things with her?" Tom asked, once again giving Harry whiplash.

"I- what… Well, we didn't… I don't know."

"And no one else, since, because?"

"Uhh- I don't know, I guess I've been… Busy. Now you're in my head so it's not really feeling all that- possible." Harry said in English.

Tom said nothing more on the subject, leaving Harry baffled.

He'd arrived late to Defence on purpose, there were few other students out at the near curfew hour, and everyone in his class was already sitting and listening to Cassiopeia introduce herself when he entered. She was in her bright crimson robes, making Tom amused.

'So dramatic,' he thought.

'Bit like you,' Harry thought at him.

"Oh wow, so nice of you to grace us with your presence, Harry," she said as he sat down, avoiding her gaze, "As I was saying, your education has been absolutely dismal in Defence Against the Dark Arts. It was unfortunately on purpose. But now, we have an opportunity to move forward and not be awful at magic together. Some of you little Slitherlings know me already, those of you who don't will soon find I believe physical combat is foundational to duelling. Most wizards and witches are standing stock still while they engage, you will not be. We will spend twenty minutes on theory, then we will go outside. Any questions?"

"Outside?" Hermione immediately asked.

Cassiopeia smiled wide at her, fangs bared, not reaching her eyes, "Outside?" She repeated, parroting Hermione's tone, "Yes. Outside of the castle."

Hermione didn't say anything more, ducking her head. Harry could tell the Slytherins were excited, Pansy kept looking at Harry and bouncing in her seat. Tom felt the same way, infecting Harry with his energy.

'It's not like we can fight,' Harry thought.

'Not when we are not practising. Your protesting is…' the thought trailed off, followed by another that Harry had often caught a metaphorical glimpse of. Incomprehensible.

'Mind your business,' Tom said in his head while Harry chased the thought.

He didn't get anything else out of Tom. Cassiopeia led them to the grounds before Harry even managed to open his books. Cassiopeia talked the Gryffindors and the Slytherins briefly through what she expected of them -brutal exertion- then she split them into groups -Slytherin vs. Gryffindor- and had them fight each other on the lawn in an all-out, no-holds-barred spar, while she had Harry run laps too far from the action to even watch.

'She is punishing us for not working on our magic, you know,' Tom said, bitter.

'I don't even really care, so there's that,' Harry lied.

Cassiopeia approached him while the students blasted each other with curses, so he stopped sprinting. Though Harry couldn't see them well, he could tell that Malfoy and Zabini in particular were laying waste to Slytherin and Gryffindor alike. He was hit by a wave of jealousy on Tom's behalf that he decided he shared.

'So let me practice.'

"Well, Slughorn vanished this morning, directly after I mentioned to you that he might need replacing, that's funny. I don't suppose you had a Potions Master in mind?" Cassiopeia asked as she reached him, interrupting Tom's complaining.

"They're going to notice you talking to me," Harry said.

"They're going to notice you're not casting or participating, either, just like they noticed you're a killer. Hey, hey, hey, relax, alright? Some of us just are. Who's to say I didn't come over here to taunt the Boy Who Lived?"

"Isn't that what you're doing?" Harry asked through gritted teeth.

"You wanted involvement, here it is. Slughorn gone, think please."

"Mulciber?" Tom asked.

"Captured, Azkaban. That's a problem for another day."

"Yaxley?"

"Dealing with… Ministry things."

"Cassiopeia..."

"I can't do it I'm teaching Defence," she grinned, put her hands up in surrender, "Dolohov is free, but he knows nothing about potions. The Carrows but, yes, exactly, far too insane. I think we need to think bigger than the inner circle, anyway," she watched Tom thinking, then said, "Oh, no, he had the same idea, and I'm genuinely not teaching Potions."

Tom did have that idea, that Dolohov take her position while she take Slughorn's.

"Think on it. I've got to go and end that sad massacre," she nodded at the students, duelling less enthusiastically, in lower numbers, mostly collapsed.