Made a Monster, Society of Villains & Sam Tinnesz
You made a monster
You made a monster
Now the trouble's coming back it's gonna haunt ya
You wanted a monster
You got a monster
No I'm never gonna stop until I want to
Look at me now
I'm a monster
It didn't have to be like this
No no
But once the venom hit my lips
Oh lord
Be careful child cause what you wish
Is what you'll get from me
He hadn't slept and had sat up all night, his head still mildly aching while he alternated between panic and confusion. Before the sun rose, Tom took them back to the grounds and ran laps, something they'd been neglecting. Harry thought about the conversation with Cassiopeia as the sky turned orange, about what Tom had said about the third and fourth Horcruxes.
"How- How old were you?" He switched to inside his head when he realized he was out of breath, 'When you made the Horcruxes?'
'The ring and the diary, I was sixteen. The locket and the cup, twenty. Twenty-one, the diadem. Nagini must be recent.'
'Why would he make a living thing into a Horcrux willingly? Nagini isn't immortal.'
'I have the same question; it was never something I considered. She appears younger than she truly is, though. I am missing something.'
Harry stopped to breathe; Tom dropped them for push-ups, letting Harry inhale when he lowered to the frosted grass.
'…What did she mean when she said he wants us to break his rules?' Harry wondered.
'He expects us to behave as a Death Eater. He assumes we will fail. He wants as many reasons as he can find…'
'To what…?'
'Do you need me to say it? Or are you imaginative? I am certain you know what.'
'He wants to punish us for it.'
Tom didn't answer and focused on mechanically forcing them off the ground in repetition.
'That means we have to… Are we going to, you know… Grovel? I mean…?'
'We do not have a choice.'
Harry stopped, refused to do any more, his face pressed into the ground.
The sun had risen entirely by the time he re-entered the castle.
'I don't want to talk about it,' Harry thought pointedly as he avoided the Death Eaters and the early risers.
'…talk about what, Harry?'
His heart skipped a beat as he tried not to think about what he didn't want to discuss.
'Nothing. I don't want to talk to you about anything.'
'…Sure.'
He felt a strange, sticky magic cling to him as he walked, stopping him in his tracks.
'…Granger.' Tom whipped around in time to see her robes disappear around the corner.
'…That's the tracking charm? Is she insane?'
Tom didn't answer and sprinted to catch up with her as she rapidly walked away with Seamus and Lavender, appearing as though she hadn't noticed him yet.
"Not enough for you?" Tom called after her, and she hesitated before she turned around. Seamus had his wand drawn already; Lavender followed his lead, both radiating fury and fear.
"What are you talking about?" She tried, and Harry immediately broke the charm, lashing the curse in her direction for good measure.
Immediately, Tom retracted it, his heart racing, and Harry remembered that he didn't want him to cast it.
'…Wait… Does it… Oh.'
'Focus.'
"Stay there! Just stay there! Don't come near her!" Seamus warned, his voice breaking.
"You don't want the truth, Hermione. I mean it," Harry told her, pleading with his eyes as he backed down the corridor, willing them to say nothing more.
"You're a Death Eater? Is that it? Is that what you've done? Make it make sense!" She barked at him. As though she summoned them, three of Voldemort's followers rounded the corner behind Hermione. They'd been chatting in a friendly manner, juxtaposing their regalia, but stilled when they saw the altercation.
"Hermione, that's the least… of what—I need you to stop or... Or I can't help you anymore."
"So, you admit it! You're one of them!?" She shouted shrill.
"I didn't say that; I said I need you to stop. Can't you see you're in over your head? What are you going to do? Follow me? What will you do then? You and who? He had you, and the DA found out in five minutes. What are you going to do?"
"Someone has to do it! Someone needs to make you see sense! I-"
"No, Hermione, I need you to see sense. It's over… I couldn't stop it; I didn't stand a chance…" Harry said before Tom took over.
"And you do not, either. You stop, or you die. That I have warned you this many times is ludicrous," he growled, more at Harry, then he added in his head, 'I will kill her myself.'
The curse crackled from his left hand, spreading like ink in water through the few metres between them: "Do not come near me. Do not speak to me. Do not attempt to follow or stop me. I will offer you no more grace. Do you understand me? Granger? Finnegan? Brown?"
They were running, Lavender dragging Hermione, so Harry hoped they understood. The three Death Eaters remained in the corridor, staring at him silently while he caught his breath, and Tom cancelled the curse.
'So, when I cast the curse… It...' Harry began as he walked down the hallway, heading for the Great Hall once more.
Tom startled him by barking a laugh, 'Oh, you do not want to talk about it? I threaten Granger's life, and your first thought thereafter is whether you casting the curse gets me-'
'That's not… What happened… I still don't want to talk about it.'
'It does.'
'It does, what?'
'…Arouse me. Exactly like it does you.'
'No… I wish you'd stop saying that… It doesn't affect me like that,' Harry insisted, though he could barely deny it to himself, at that point, '…So, it's worse than when… You do it yourself?'
'Substantially.'
His stomach flipped at Tom's thoughts, and he was grateful to spot Ginny alone at the Gryffindor table, a wide berth between her and their housemates.
"Sorry, I needed to clear my head," he'd left her in the Room of Requirement that morning. She spent less and less time in the tower.
"No worries," she said when he sat down. There was a book open on her lap, hidden under the table. The one Tom had given her.
"Is it… A good book?"
"Excellent. Thank you. By the way, I don't think I said…"
"That's okay. It wasn't really me, you know," he focused on putting fruit on his plate and didn't look at her.
"I kind of thought so… Are you—do you find it—hmm," she stopped, frowning, and started again. I know that… Part of you is okay with this, but are you? You haven't told me…"
"How do you feel about my magic? Because I—" He realised he'd answered with a question: "I'm okay with it. Necromancy doesn't freak me out, really. You seem to like it a lot?"
"It scares me. Your magic," she whispered, "I know you said you have it under control, but… I know you can't help it. Nec- necromancy feels… I don't know. It feels like I was made for it. Like I can't- can't deny it."
"Yeah…" He could almost say he knew what she meant, "Seems like you might have been," he gave her a small smile and swallowed the guilt her fear gave him.
"I really do have it under control." He wanted to say more, but the number of students in the hall had increased.
"Do you… Do you want to skip in the Vivarium with Avalon and Eris?" She asked.
"Is that your plan for the day?" Harry thought about Buckbeak while she sheepishly nodded.
"Avalon said they pretty much do what they want, and she asked me… So," she was standing, so he followed her.
"Yeah, alright."
They walked in near silence, each becoming skilled in avoiding pointed glares.
"When you said that Grindelwald predicted Dumbledore's death and all the stuff about- how did you know that?" Ginny asked as they sat outside the glasshouse to wait for Eris and Avalon.
"I can… I can see into his head. Whenever I want, really, now. Voldemort's. Because of…" He could barely mention Tom without his insides doing cartwheels.
"And the Horcrux… Remembers things that You-Know-Who… Does?"
"He remembers everything up to…" Harry tapped his scar.
She winced and remained silent momentarily before saying, "And you're still… You still seem like you're close with it—him—sorry…"
Harry's stomach jumped, and he stared at the greenhouse instead of Ginny, who was frowning.
"We're- This will sound crazy but- but he's…" He struggled to find the appropriate word, "I mean he can be- obviously- but… He's not the same as Voldemort. Not exactly," he knew his cheeks were red, so he turned to look at the castle, "He's kept me alive so far. He's kept you alive so far, too. Hermione. Everyone… He's- got his- his own goals, but… He hasn't lied to me yet, and…" Harry stopped trying to defend himself and Tom, who was quiet in his head.
"…Avalon said that you saw Albert?" Ginny changed the subject.
"Yeah. We went to talk to Cedrum for you. To make sure that it would be alright. They were- they were working on him. In the Transfiguration classroom."
"So, Avalon is holding that man up for… For You-Know-Who?"
"I think so," Harry said quietly.
She didn't say anything after that. Harry's hissing broke the silence as he was caught off guard by the stinging burn on his right arm, standing him bolt upright. He saw Ginny register him grasping his forearm and take in the look on his face; then she was standing, too.
"Are you okay? Is that…"
"Yeah, yeah, it is. I'm alright. I'll see you later, alright?"
He tried to appear calm as he left her there, looking as distraught as he felt, and it seemed like she wanted to follow him.
'Where are we going? Is he here?'
'Apparate without a destination,' Tom was walking them deeper into the trees, searching for the edge of the new wards, heart hammering, 'Let me do this.'
Harry didn't need to be told twice. He Apparated as he reached the edge and reappeared in front of the small cottage with the glowing green wards, nearly blinding in the sun. Tom moved them, taking uneven breaths as he pushed through the door, eyes on the floorboards. The tug of the thread in his solar plexus told them that Voldemort was in the room. A quick scan of the floor and the area surrounding the Dark Lord showed that Nagini wasn't. The Dark Lord sat at the desk, unmasked, already scowling at him, in dress robes.
"You called for me, my Lord," Tom said smoothly, just above a whisper, bowing at the middle.
"Twelve Grimmauld Place," he spat, seemingly made angrier by subservience.
"Kreacher," Tom surprised Harry by calling for the elf, who appeared with a crack.
"The traps and fail-safes at Twelve Grimmauld Place, are you able to bypass them?" Tom asked, keeping his voice low and even.
"Yes, Harry Potter."
Tom didn't say anything more, eyes still firmly on the floor as he waited.
"Regulus Black took a locket from my possession and attempted to destroy it. Is it inside the residence?" The Dark Lord asked the elf, who nodded rapidly.
"He tried to get Kreacher to participate; he was a foul blood traitor-"
"Retrieve it," Tom interrupted, "Bring it to the Dark Lord."
'But he wants to use them to kill us and-'
'Harry, do you think resisting is a better idea?' Tom didn't let him finish his thought, and Kreacher vanished with a nod and a pop.
"In four days, we storm Azkaban. You will be ready. Out."
"Yes, my Lord," Tom gave a short bow and pretended they were steady as he walked them out of the hut, then the wards, where he Disapparated.
As soon as they reappeared in the forest, Tom sat down, took a deep, shaking breath, and then entered Voldemort's head.
He disregarded what the Dark Lord was actively doing—he was still sitting at the desk in the small hut, glaring at the locket, already in his hands—and found the memory of the minutes that had just passed.
'You think he'll bend to your will but he wont he wont he cant he's me and I wouldn't I couldn't I FUCKING HATE YOU LIKE HE HATES YOU SO HE'LL STOP YOU-' The thing in his head had been flipping wildly between loathing the Boy Who Lived and lauding him. The door had opened, interrupted the voice, and Harry Potter entered, bowed low:
"You called for me, my Lord."
'No no that's not him that's you that's YOU IT'S FUCKING YOU YOU'RE LOOKING AT YOURSE-'
"Twelve Grimmauld Place," he forced out.
"Kreacher."
The thing in his head was right; he was talking to his Horcrux. The mannerisms and cadence obvious. There was certainly no fight from the Boy Who Lived, though. The elf appeared, and the Horcrux questioned it:
"The traps and fail-safes at Twelve Grimmauld Place, are you able to bypass them?"
'He already knows it's there BECAUSE HE'S IN HERE TOO IN HERE TOO WITH ME LOOKING AT YOU maybe he has it maybe he's going to destroy it DESTROY YOU-"
"Yes, Harry Potter."
"Regulus Black took a locket from my possession and attempted to destroy it. Is it inside the residence?" The Dark Lord asked, releasing his tongue from his teeth.
"He tried to get Kreacher to participate; he was a foul blood traitor-"
"Retrieve it," the Horcrux told the elf, "Bring it to the Dark Lord."
'NO NO NO YOU WON'T YOU'VE POISONED EVERYTHING-'
"In four days, we storm Azkaban. You will be ready. Out."
"Yes, my Lord," he bowed and ducked out of the room as the elf reappeared, dropped the locket on the desk, and vanished again.
Tom retreated from the Dark Lord's head, and Harry felt his rapid thoughts.
'He didn't seem to know about your plan with Nagini,' Harry said in his head.
'No. The Horcrux seems to know what he has in mind.'
There was a long silence, during which Harry struggled to make sense of it and devise a plan in the face of yet another seemingly insurmountable hurdle, while Tom did the same.
'…Well, we didn't get Crucioed,' Harry thought.
'…Maybe next time.'
Harry frowned but ignored the comment, 'Four days?'
'Yes.'
'…And you just gave him the Horcrux. That you didn't tell me was in Sirius' house.'
'Mm. It was not relevant. It was not ours. Resisting him would have only slowed him down and earned us…'
'Okay, I think you're pretty shit at choosing what's relevant.'
He decided to find Ginny, adrenaline still shredding him from the inside. He wanted a distraction. She'd be relieved to know he was mostly fine, and maybe he'd find Buckbeak.
He hesitated marginally at the entrance to the Vivarium, hands still shaking from the leftover panic before he entered. He spotted them immediately, sitting in a group in the sun near the edge of the trees.
"Harry!" Ginny called.
He jogged over, sat beside her, and nodded at Eris and Avalon, still not trusting his words.
"Good morning, Harry," Avalon said, peeling an apple manually with a tiny switchblade.
"Are you okay?" Ginny asked, and he nodded at high speed.
"I was just telling Ginny that Cedrum wants her to test her limits tonight; we are going on a field trip," Avalon continued as though Harry had answered her, "I can't wait to see."
"Er, yeah. You'll come, right, Harry?" Ginny said, frowning deeply at him.
"Yeah, I'll go with you. Have you- have you seen Buckbeak?"
"Not this morning," Ginny said, scanning the sky as she spoke.
"I love how warm it is in here, non?" She dropped her apple in the grass, half peeled. She laid back, star-fished and staring at the smattering of clouds.
"So do I," Tom said.
He'd stayed with Ginny, Eris, and Avalon all day, at first in the Vivarium —not spotting Buckbeak in the hours they spent there— then wandering the grounds and castle while Ginny and Avalon chattered, Eris and Harry both silent, Ginny shooting him concerned looks.
They'd gone to the Great Hall for dinner, something he hadn't done all year. Almost as soon as they'd sat down, Zabini slammed a copy of the Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore on the Gryffindor table in front of Harry.
"I was wondering if you could show me that section about Grindelwald's hookah; I can't seem to find it, silly me," he laughed without humour.
"Oh, of course, Blaise," Tom said.
He picked up the book, tossed it into the air above their heads, and then tore it into shreds in the same instant with the curse. He'd snaked it over them and earned several screams and yelps from the students in the hall, some choosing to run. He burned the pieces as they fell, coating the table and the food in ash and embers.
"I hope that clears things up for you," Tom said warmly.
Zabini glared, nostrils flaring, before he stormed out of the hall.
"I can't read this," Eris said, "I can't eat it either." He shot Harry a blank look and stood up; Avalon and Ginny followed him, Harry hesitating for a moment longer.
'You shouldn't have used the curse in the hall.'
'You should not have told me to lie.'
'You shouldn't have said anything about the hookah or the mark to begin with!'
Tom was silent at that, and Harry stood up feeling somewhat victorious.