The first thing, he noticed when waking up again, was the missing pain. He felt lighter. Breathing was easier and as he carefully tried to swallow, it only felt odd after all this time but not uncomfortable. He moved his head and lifted his hands to his face. Cautiously, he removed some of the bandages on his right arm. He found the skin healed – scarred, but healed. His left foot wasn't broken anymore and he wiggled it free from the blanket.

He was still in his mother's bedroom, although, he noticed some tech he recognized as oceanic, cables and rods which supported a glass cover above the bed. Neri lay next to him, still sound asleep, wearing a O.R.C.A. uniform. Her skin looked healthy again, the shadows under her eyes were gone even though the traces of sorrow were still visible. He resisted the urge to stroke her face that would have woken her and instead, just watched her for a few seconds more before carefully getting out of bed.

It felt strange to move around freely, to stand and to walk as if nothing ever happened. He quietly closed the bathroom door to take a small sip of tab water. It felt normal, cool and smooth, delicious even. The removed the rest of the bandages on his arm and examined his body further. The burns on his right side were also healed. He found no bruises or swelling, felt no traces of pain or discomfort.

"H.E.L.E.N.?" he asked with a low voice.

"Yes, Jason?"

He watched his still bandaged face in the mirror. "What date is today?"

"It's the 22th of July, Tuesday."

He gasped in surprise. "I've only been back for one day?"

"For 8 hours and 48 minutes", H.E.L.E.N. replied.

"Is that glass thing above the part of some kind of healing pod?"

"I am not familiar with this technology but I am pleased to see that your vitals have significantly improved. It is good to have you back, Jason."

"Thank you, H.E.L.E.N.. It's good to be home." He took a deep breath and removed the white fabric from his face. Some part of him dreaded his own sight but he couldn't keep the bandages on forever. It wasn't as bad as he had feared. There were burn scars on his cheek and right ear, a bald spot above it where hair would never regrow but it was still him. He traced the scars with his fingertip. The nerves had been damaged. He felt the pressure but not the touch itself. His hearing and his sight were perfectly fine, though.

"H.E.L.E.N.? What time is it?"

"It's 04:23 am."

He snuck out of the apartment as quietly as he could, just grabbing a sweater on the way. His family would be all over him as soon as they would know he was awake but he wasn't sure if he was ready for it. He practically returned from the dead. If he had still trouble wrapping his head around everything, it must be worse for them.

He managed to get up to the platform without meeting anyone. It was still dark but the horizon was already brightening up. Jason leaned against the railing towards the dawn and took a deep breath of salty air. It was warm but windy. He could hear the waves hitting the boats and loose parts of the platform around him, making them rocking and bumping into each other. A moment of piece, he thought and felt guilty for it for a second. Part of him still yearned back to a time where he hadn't known who he was. Just a victim of a tragedy, not a key piece in a brewing war.

From the corner of his eye, he saw someone approaching and turned around to meet Neri's gaze. She examined his face coming closer but somehow, he couldn't tell what she thought or felt. She wore a strange stoic mask and didn't return his smile.

"Neri? Are you ok?"

"No," she spat angrily and the stoic mask melted into a furious expression. "You sent me away. You promised to come back and instead, you sent us away."

Startled, it took him a second to respond. This was definitely not how he imagined their reunion. "There was no other way… "

She shoved him – not very hard but he was so puzzled that he stumbled backwards against some stapled boxes. "I could have helped you!"

"There was no time, Neri, and I wanted you save." Even to his ears, that sounded lame.

"If I had helped you, maybe there would have been time!" She shoved him again. Getting annoyed, he caught her arms by the wrists and hold them against his chest.

"You don't know that," he replied. "And how it this different from trying to blow up the Pyramid?"

"We were together." It would be easy for her to free herself but instead she grabbed the fabric of his sweater, pulling him closer. She trembled slightly, radiating anger and pain. He loosened his grip to an affectionate hold and caressed her hands with his thumbs. This was more than just about his sole decision to enter a suicide mission. She retreated her hands and took a step back, turning her face toward the sea.

"I can't promise to never run into the fire again," he told her gently, "but I know, you can't promise me that either. I would never leave you voluntarily. Not now, not ever. Not in any way."

"When why did you?"

They watched the first beams of sunlight dancing on the water while he searched his mind for an explanation. The answer wasn't far deep, just something he would have liked to avoid admitting.

"When I saw the bomb, part of me gave up," he finally said quietly. "I was … tired of the struggle. Every time, we win a battle, there are new ones to fight. Removing the explosives one by one … there was something soothing about it. I was at peace knowing I wouldn't make it out but you would. I felt relieved for a moment, that I wouldn't live another day to fight." He took a breath and shifted towards Neri, seeking eye contact. Her lips were tightly pressed together but the look in her eyes wasn't as hard as before. "I did leave you," he whispered. "I left you alone in this mess. I'm sorry."

Neri turned her gaze towards the rising sun again. The soft light and the beams which were reflected by the sea surface danced on her face, reminding him just how beautiful she was. A magnificent creature of ocean and wind, a force of nature.

"I felt when you remembered," she said slowly. "I had lost you and suddenly, I could feel you in my mind again. Your confusion. Your pain." Their gaze met. "Your regret waking up."

He took her hand firmly into his. "I don't regret remembering you."

"I know," she replied. "I know it was for me you that you remembered." She sighed, turned towards him and added her other hand to the bundle of fingers around each other. "I am not angry at you. I envy you."

Puzzled, but relieved Jason pulled her closer to him. She gave him the smallest of smiles. "I am tired of fighting, too. When you were gone, I felt … empty. I was nothing but still had to be everything. A sister, a daughter. A princess. A chosen one."

"I feel like I should promise you," he grinned, "that next time, we will die together."

Neri didn't return his smile. "Promise. Together or not at all."

He got serious. "Together or not at all," he promised and kissed her fingers. "You know," he said after a moment of silence, "in the hospital, they said my survival was a miracle. I was never a believer but maybe I can't die as long as you live. Because it's not you and me anymore, only we. Because it's always been, we."

"You couldn't die because we are not finished," Neri corrected him. "And you did know that."

"I was trying to be romantic," he replied with a crooked smile. "But I was also serious. I was tired because I was fighting so many battles at the same time, although some of them were unnecessary. It was just about to figure out what I want."

"What do you want?"

"I wanna go back to a time before Malakat," he admitted. "Back to the beach, after we saved the world again with the synchronium. You were in my arms, your smile was radiant. I should have kissed you right there, and I'm not talking about the pecks we had shared before. I should have told you how much I was already yours. Back then, we would have had time to figure everything out without the world exploding all around us."

Neri smiled. "We were children. We were not ready."

"Yes. I was afraid and part of me still is." Neri tilted her head while she was waiting for him to continue. "It is childish," he went on, "but just being friends – innocent – was holding on to a time, where we still had an out. Just leaving it to the grown-ups. No one would have blamed us if we had just left the responsibility to Mum, Winston, or Dad. We are still way in over our head but now, we are the ones people look to for solutions. It's silly, I know."

Neri shook her head. "It is not silly. It was your … safe place. Our relationship moving forward means more uncertainty."

"It did." Her forehead crimpled when he emphasized the past sense. "But it is our relationship which should be the safe place. And it is what I want for us. The certainty that we can look to each other, no matter what. When I woke up, I chose you. Because I chose you, I woke up."

They opened up their hands, just to hold them against each other, their fingers intertwining.

"I look to you, no matter what," Neri said quietly, but her voice firm.

"I look to you, no matter what," Jason confirmed. "You are my heart."

They held each other tightly while watching the sunrise. Somehow, it felt to him, as if a piece of a complicated puzzle finally fell into the right place. To fill out the rest of the picture was less of an obstacle now.