AN: So we've had an interesting turn of events last chapter. I've got nothing to say, honestly, other than enjoy the direct continuation of these twists, along with the continuation of the roller coaster of emotions that has been the Thimble Arc. Enjoy, y'all!
Chapter 78: What I Should Have Said
A few hours after executing Dr. Stein, Gretel Kobalt laid in her bed, dressed in nothing but black-lace lingerie that clung to her athletic, but curvaceous form. A deep blush and a wistful smile adorned her lovely face as she held a framed photo in one hand while she gently stroked it with her other hand. She sighed longingly as she gazed at the photo of a young boy who was quite familiar to her.
"Ah, my adorable little brother." She whispered to herself as she stroked the frame with disturbing adoration, considering who it was a picture of. "Oh, it's been so long since we've seen each other, hasn't it? Oh, to finally see the man you've grown into, Hansel. I can't wait. Our tear-filled reunion, eight years in the making, will be upon us soon. I can feel it in my blood."
The hand stroking the photo left it, dropping dangerously close to her lower body. A knock at her door quickly broke Gretel from her thoughts. She then heard a familiar voice on the other side. It was her loyal subordinate, Giovanni Scarlatto, the 9 of Spades.
"Lady Ace, may I come in?" He asked. Gretel smiled teasingly, knowing she would get a rise out of him for this. She shifted her position so that she was resting on her side.
"Come in, Gio." She ordered. "The door is unlocked."
The door opened and Giovanni stepped inside. His eyes immediately widened when he saw his superior in such an erotic state of undress. He looked away, clearly refusing to stare.
"Lady Ace, please tell me when you're not decent. Neglecting to tell me such information defeats the purpose of knocking!" He exclaimed indignantly. Gretel laughed in amusement.
"Oh don't be such a prude, Gio," she teased, not caring about her current state in the slightest. Her expression then turned cold. "First off, the mask is off, I'm not 'Lady Ace' right now. Second, more importantly, we both know there are more important things right now. After all, you wouldn't dare interrupt my private time otherwise."
Giovanni coughed awkwardly. He saw the photo in Gretel's hand and winced, knowing who it was a picture of. Only a few in Gray Jackal knew who the Ace of Spades was under the mask. Among that few, even fewer knew of a very dark fact about Gretel Kobalt. And that fact was her downright disturbing obsession with her younger brother, Gray Jackal's nemesis: Hansel Kobalt. Those who knew were Gretel's three direct subordinates, all of whom were far too terrified to even talk about her obsessive tendencies behind her back.
"You are correct." Giovanni admitted. "First, let me just say, excellent work in execution as always, my lady. Your skills in dealing death are truly a work of art."
"Aww, so sweet." Gretel cooed. "What impressed you this time?"
Giovanni, as always, forgot being put off by his superior's disturbing obsession with her brother and smiled in awe and respect for her. He always loved watching his superior work, and knew exactly what impressed him about her this time.
"Your speed and precision, my lady." Giovanni said in awe. "Your sword moved so fast not a single drop of blood from Stein's neck stained the blade."
Gretel giggled in amusement. She moved from her more seductive pose and sat up straight in a more casual position.
"I knew you would notice." Gretel actually smiled at this. "Your perceptiveness has always been leagues ahead of Silvia and Rufus. In fact, out of all the Numbers in Gray Jackal, your sensory abilities are the best."
"Thank you, my lady." Giovanni says gratefully. "You honor me."
"Ugh, always so stiff, Giovanni. Now, what is the real reason you've chosen to interrupt my private time?" Gretel's cold expression returned. Giovanni cleared his throat.
"My lady," he began, "it has been two days since the…failure in Thimble. While the late Dr. Stein was a fool who earned his death…I cannot argue there was some merit in his attempt to capture the girl."
"Get to the point, Gio." Gretel already sounded bored.
"Lady Gretel, I am more than happy to return to Patch Island, track down and bring in Ruby Rose myself." Giovanni promised as he bowed to Gretel. He then lifted his head, showing a determined expression. "Simply order it and it shall be-"
"No," Gretel was already lying back down on her bed, "let the girl go."
That was not the answer Giovanni was expecting to hear. He blinked in surprise. Gretel Kobalt had a tendency to act on a whim, but to outright express something that went against what the organization wanted? That was new even for her.
"But…why?" Giovanni asked in disbelief.
"Gio…what is the main 'talent' of our division, the Spade Division?" Gretel asked.
"Assassination, of course." Giovanni responded without hesitation.
"And why, pray tell, should I waste valuable resources on a retrieval mission? Resources far better served for the job they were hired for." Gretel scoffed. "That's like asking a fast food restaurant manager who rose through the ranks to return to being a fry cook. He would succeed in his task, but it would still be a waste of resources."
"But…I would succeed." Giovanni pointed out.
"As would any other lower-ranked soldier as long as they're not a goddamn idiot." Gretel explained in an uncaring tone of voice. "Do you know why I voted for Stein's execution, Gio?"
"No ma'am, I do not." Giovanni admitted.
"Because that imbecile forgot his role. He got greedy. He was a scientist, a researcher, not a fighter nor a kidnapper. If he did not try to do too much for his own personal glory, I'd have voted against his execution. That would've brought the vote to a tie, and as you know, the tiebreaker goes in favor of the accused." Gretel frowned. "He got greedy. And I absolutely detest greedy men."
"I…see." Giovanni muttered.
"Besides," Gretel continued, "trying to capture Ruby Rose is a fool's errand right now."
"It…is, ma'am?" Giovanni was now confused.
"The other higher ups see her as a potential trump card thanks to the power of her Silver Eyes." Gretel explained. "And thanks to the information we've been able to gather, it's clear that Professor Ozpin is attempting to draw out her potential himself. Ask yourself, Giovanni: why in the world should we waste our time trying to help a rose bloom in full when someone else is willing to play gardener for us?"
"...It's a waste of resources and manpower." Giovanni realized, remembering Gretel's earlier words. Gretel smiled, turning her head to look at him.
"Now you're getting it." She said with a hint of playfulness. "The next time I meet my fellow Rulers, I plan to propose leaving the girl alone until she has sufficiently grown on her own. We can bring her into the fold afterwards, and then use her power for our own gain. It's idiotic for us to try and manipulate and mold a girl like that while training her. We'd get nowhere."
"If you think that is best, I will leave the girl be." Giovanni promised. "I'm sorry to have wasted your time, Lady Gretel. If I had considered your point sooner, I wouldn't have approached you to begin with."
"It's fine, Gio, I love the fact you stress over such things." Gretel calmly brushed the matter off. "Now leave. I would like some privacy."
"...As you wish, milady." With that, Giovanni turned and shut the door behind him, leaving Gretel alone in her room with that damn photo of her little brother. Gretel then squealed with happiness as she embraced the photo to her lingerie-clad chest.
"Ah, my sweet, sweet Hansel." She giggled. "Even today, you wear your emotions and your intentions on your sleeve, little brother. We may not have seen each other for 8 years, but I still know just what you want. We're family after all. You declared war on Gray Jackal just for me, didn't you? You trained as a Huntsman just to go after me, didn't you? And you're coming for me, aren't you, Hansel? You're coming to kill me."
Gretel's smile turned downright disturbing once more as she pulled the photo from her chest and gazed longingly at the boy in the photo. Her hand was back to caressing it.
"Oh, I can't wait." She said longingly. "I can't wait to see the man you've grown into, little brother. And while I am loath to show you just how little I care for all your hard work…I also can't wait to end your short career as a Huntsman and send you into an early retirement."
Meanwhile, back in Thimble, after suffering his worst panic attack in years, Hansel Kobalt was finally able to recover from his fallout with his adoptive father and mentor, Professor Ozpin. He shakily rose to his feet and reached into his pocket. He did not know why. Perhaps it was instinct? Perhaps it was the fact that Hansel was technically unconscious for a period of time, and his psyche told him to check his messages when he came out of him? Either way, when Hansel retrieved his scroll from his pocket, he discovered he had one new message. It was from Qrow, and it was an address; a Patch Island address. Hansel immediately realized Qrow had come through for him. With a quick 'thank you' message, Hansel now knew where he was going.
Meanwhile, Qrow heard his scroll vibrate. He took it out and saw Hansel's thank you message. He winced, wondering if he should broach the awkward subject of Hansel and Ozpin's falling out. Qrow gazed over at Ozpin, who was discussing the situation with what was left of Thimble's able bodied Huntsmen. He saw how stiff Ozpin looked. And while the man was managing to maintain a sense of professionalism and attention, Qrow could tell that his mind was partially on his falling out with Hansel. With a sigh, Qrow came to a decision.
They need to come together on their own terms. If I try to force it, it's just gonna make things worse, especially with how Oz did something he can't take back. I mean…hitting Hansel…he's never hit him like that before. I mean, I get they were arguing, but you don't hit your kids. You just don't. Qrow concluded. He looked at Ozpin, noting how tense the man looked. He sighed. Drop the pride and admit you went too far, Oz. You and the kid have been too close for years to ruin it now…
Several hours later, with a bit of research, Hansel Kobalt found himself walking up to a small house in the middle of nowhere. He took a look down at the address Qrow had texted him and nodded in satisfaction. This location matched the address. He had found the Xiao Long-Rose household. Hansel could not help but shake his head. He had lived so close to these two as a child all this time and it never occurred to him. Hansel then took a deep breath.
"Moment of truth." He muttered, working up the courage to walk up to the front door. Taking another deep breath, he knocked and waited for a response. The door opened after a few moments, revealing a middle-aged, well-built blonde man. Just looking at him, Hansel was reminded of his most annoying student: Yang. He immediately knew who it was.
"Mr. Xiao Long?" Hansel asked curiously.
"Who wants to know?" Taiyang raised an eyebrow.
"My name is Hansel Kobalt…I'm…the combat teacher at Beacon." Hansel explained.
"I remember you," Taiyang nodded, "you're the kid who was on the ground, half-unconscious after that fight with the scorpion man. So, you're the famous Hansel Kobalt I've heard so much about. Why are you here? Should you even be up and about?"
"I'm a fast healer." Hansel said quickly. "As for why I'm here…I came to check on the kid. Is she okay?"
"I have two kids, Professor." Taiyang frowned. "You're going to have to be a bit more specific than that."
"I'm here to check on Ro…" Hansel trailed off. What was he doing, still trying to detach himself from her. He was here to check on her for crying out loud. If he was her dad, he certainly would not let someone who would not even say her name near his daughter. "...I'm here to check on Ruby."
"...I see." Taiyang nodded. "So…you're worried about her?"
"Yes sir, yes I am." Hansel said politely.
"For crying out loud, Dad, why're you still talking? If it's a solicitor, send him away, we've got way bigger problems to deal with and don't have time for-" Yang Xiao Long walked into view with a frustrated look on her face. She stopped in her tracks when she saw the familiar face in the doorway. "Teach? Is that you?"
"Hey," Hansel said simply, "I'm here to check on your sister."
"...You are?" Yang was genuinely taken aback by this.
"...How is she?" Hansel asked softly.
"Not great," Yang sighed, her expression turned distraught, "she's never been…like this before. Damn it…this was supposed to be a family vacation, Teach. Something to get away from it all, and it turned into a nightmare…"
"I know…I'm sorry." Hansel sighed.
"The hell are you sorry for?" Yang demanded. "Never mind…I don't know why you decided you needed to check on Ruby…but if you want to give it a try, be my guest. She's…kinda locked herself in her room since we got back. She won't talk to anyone."
"You wanna let him try, huh, Yang?" Taiyang eyed Hansel. Hansel winced. He probably deserved that look. Taiyang likely knew how disastrous his first day teaching was and how Ruby suffered for it. Yang nodded without hesitation.
"Teach is fine, Dad. If he wants to try, let him." Yang looked at Hansel. "Just…don't be surprised if you fail too, Teach. This is…uncharted territory for all of us. Ruby's never gotten to a point where she's shut out everyone."
Taiyang stepped aside and Hansel entered. He then looked around awkwardly.
"You have a nice home." Hansel said politely.
"I appreciate it, but please cut the pleasantries." Taiyang told him. "You're here to help Ruby, focus on that."
Hansel winced and nodded. Yang pointed behind her.
"You'll know when you see it. Zwei's basically made in front of her room his home until she comes out." Yang told him. Hansel nodded again and walked past them. Hansel slowly trudged up the stairs and soon found himself staring down a small hallway. And at the foot of one door in particular, Zwei the corgi was curled up, whimpering in concern. Hansel sighed as he approached.
"You two, huh? Are you also worried?" Zwei's ears perked up at Hansel's voice. He looked at Hansel and whimpered again, nodding. Yang's voice then came from downstairs.
"Zwei, here boy. Let's give them some space." Zwei whimpered again at the sound of Yang's voice before getting up and trotting past Hansel down the stairs. Hansel could not help but feel grateful to Yang for doing that. Zwei may have been a dog, but the idea of having any kind of audience made him nervous. Comforting someone was completely new to him. However, he had to try, for her sake. So, he walked up to the door, only to be stopped in his tracks by the shockingly harsh but utterly broken voice of Ruby Rose from behind her door.
"Go away!" She said sharply. Hansel froze at this. That voice made him actually want to cry. That voice just was not who she was at all. A part of Hansel felt like a hypocrite for daring to be upset by this, after so much time openly being against what she stood for. But, now that she was acting differently. It hurt. The way she was right now just was not Ruby Rose. And much to his own surprise, Hansel hated it.
"...I'm sorry, Kid." Hansel said to her. "But…I can't. Not when you're like this."
"I don't wanna talk about it." Ruby insisted. Hansel winced again, she was clearly crying. He could tell just from her voice.
"That's fine. I can do all the talking and still get my point across." Hansel proclaimed.
"Then I won't listen." That almost made Hansel say something biting in response. That was such a childish thing to say.
"May I come in?" Hansel patiently asked.
"I told you to go away." Ruby reminded him.
"Fine," Hansel quickly came to a decision, "I can either sit on the floor, make myself comfortable, and then talk; or I can break the door down and talk to you directly, it's your choice."
"...You wouldn't do either of those things." Ruby proclaimed.
"You've seen me break worse than doors, Kid." Hansel reminded her.
"But this is the door of someone else's house. You'd never destroy private property outside of a fight." Ruby's tone was a mixture of broken and petulant now.
"Okay, and what makes you think I won't just sit down and make myself comfy?"
"The floor's uncomfortable."
"So is leaving you like this." Hansel countered before turning around and sitting cross legged. "I'm sitting down right now, Kid."
Silence. Ruby was clearly done talking with him. Hansel sighed. It was now or never.
"Now listen, I know I'm probably the last person you should be hearing this from, but you do need to hear this." Hansel told her. "I'm…look, I'm terrible with this stuff, okay? I don't comfort people…but you need to hear this from someone outside your own family. And according to that Gardenia woman, I've gotta take responsibility and I'm…I'm worried about you, Kid. So even if I'm terrible at this. I can't walk away."
"...You should. I don't…want to hear anything from you." Ruby insisted.
"You need to though. Right now, it's not about what you want, it's about what you need." Hansel fired back. "Kid…please, let me try at least. I'll gladly do all the talking if you really don't want to say anything. Just please…please listen. Because even if I am terrible at this…I can't forgive myself if I don't try to help you work through this. I may be the only one who fully understands what you're going through right now. So please, please, listen. You don't have to talk. Just listen. Please. Please. Please. Just listen."
"...Why are you picking now of all times to care like a normal person?" Hansel could tell Ruby was trying to sound harsh. He immediately realized she was still trying to push him away. The fact he was getting her to respond was progress.
"I don't know," Hansel admitted, "but I'm staying here, Kid."
"Please, Professor…please just go away."
"...I won't." Hansel said simply. After a few moments, much to Hansel's surprise, he heard the door unlock. After a few moments of sitting in a stunned stupor, he heard Ruby's voice on the other side.
"...Come in. That floor is not comfortable to sit on, and talking to a door is kinda stupid."
"...Okay." Hansel rose to his feet and opened the door. His expression turned pained when he saw the broken and distraught form of Ruby Rose in her room. She was sitting on her bed, a thousand yard stare. Her appearance was unkempt due to having not been taking care of herself since returning home. Her eyes were red from crying. "May I sit next to you?"
Ruby nodded. Hansel calmly walked forward, closing the door behind him. He took a seat next to her.
"You were right." Ruby said as soon as Hansel sat down. "You were right all along."
"Okay, what was I so right about?" Hansel asked softly.
"I wasn't ready…for any of this. My ideals…naive, and a total waste." Ruby choked out, looking like she wanted to break down in tears again. "You can…finally say I told you so."
Hansel winced. She was not entirely wrong. A part of him still truly hated her ideals. He still did believe she was not ready for what Ozpin tried to put on her shoulders.
"You're right, I can." Hansel nodded in agreement. He then sighed, his shoulders slumping. "But…right now, I don't want to."
Ruby was surprised by this kind of response. Of all the things Hansel could have said to her, that was the last thing she expected. Her face then fell. She lowered her head further.
"That's fine, you don't have to. I get it, okay? You were right and I was wrong. I wasn't ready for any of this." Ruby said to him. "I…I don't wanna be like this anymore, Professor. I just…I wanna be like you now. Numb to everyone and everything. I mean, maybe your life is tough…but at the very least, you're happy. I can live a calmer life if I just approach it like you do."
Hansel looked at Ruby in disbelief. Happy? She honestly thought he was happy in spite of everything? Was he happy? There was only one real answer he could give.
"Kid, I fucking hate my life." Hansel admitted. "Nearly everyone in the world hates me, I'm constantly fighting for my life, I'm barely functional as a human being, I mean, for Gods' sake, I had to be told to come and try to talk you off a fucking ledge. I can barely hold onto the relationships I have. I'm an absolute wreck as a person"
Ruby looked at Hansel in disbelief. She never imagined he could ever say that.
"I'm not happy, Kid. I'm miserable." Hansel admitted. "Don't ever tell me again you want to be like me. You don't want it, trust me. Hell, I'm half tempted to smack you for saying something like that."
"How could you even…" Ruby began.
"No, listen to me." Hansel sighed. "Listen to me, Kid…I don't want you or any of your classmates to turn out like me. The world doesn't even need one of me, let alone many of me."
"But…everything you said…everything you've been trying to teach us…" Ruby trailed off.
"Don't misunderstand me, Kid." Hansel shook his head. "Your ideals are naive and they open you up for a lot of agony…as you've discovered. And Ozpin told you the truth about your powers far too early. But the truth is…I was wrong in how I explained things to you and the other classmates. Kid…I'm sorry, if I had perhaps explained things better, You might've handled what happened to those kids better. But…at the very least, let me try to make things right now and say what I want to say now…what I should've said back then."
"What…you should have said?" Ruby muttered.
"Kid…Ruby," Hansel took a deep breath, "the hardest part about our job, as you've discovered, is that you can't save everyone."
"...I know that now." Ruby acknowledged.
"It's agony," Hansel admitted, "Whether you're a cop, a soldier, a fireman, a Huntsman…the fact is, people like us agonize over the fact we're compelled to try and save everyone we can, when in reality all we do is open ourselves up to pain and misery."
"So…why do we do it?" Ruby asked softly.
"...Because that's who we are. We throw ourselves into the fire, knowing we'll fail and stumble along the way. And we do it because it's the right thing to do…because not trying is just as agonizing. We put ourselves through hell so that we can save as many as possible, fail along the way, and pick ourselves back up while carrying the memories of those we've failed to save in our hearts. We do our best to save everyone while simultaneously acknowledging we'll never obtain the power to save everyone." Hansel sadly admitted. "And I'm sorry, Ruby. I should've better explained that to you and to the others. If I had done that, you might've been better prepared for what happened."
"But then what's the point of having all this power then? Professor Ozpin and Uncle Qrow say I'm special. What's the point of having all this power if I can't even save some kids?" Ruby teared up. She looked up at Hansel pleadingly. "Please, tell me Professor? What's the point?"
"What's the point?" Hansel repeated. He sighed. "Only you can decide that…but let me tell you right now. I will not accept you choosing to become like me: cold, numb and miserable. The world is a cruel place, Ruby. Numbing yourself to the cruelty it brings won't fix anything. It'll just make things worse. If you want to find meaning in your life…don't become like me, instead, become what I couldn't: someone who recognizes that the world is cruel and stays true to herself. Someone who can try and try and try, and come back stronger and stronger."
"But I'm not strong! If I was…all those kids…" Ruby finally started sobbing. "I'm a failure…I couldn't save any of them…"
Hansel's eyes widened. For all his efforts in trying to encourage her, he was failing. However, when Hansel fully comprehended that Ruby said she could not save any of those orphans, he realized he had to change his tactics.
"But you did save one, remember?" Hansel asked gently. Ruby's eyes widened. "Cedric. You did save one. Or does he not matter because you couldn't save all of them?"
"What? No, that's not…" Ruby trailed off.
"Ruby…you saved Cedric." Hansel reached into his pocket and fished out Cedric's letter. "And he was so grateful that he actually wrote you this. I haven't opened it…but I just know that it's a thank you letter for saving his life. You saved him. You made a difference in his life. I know you couldn't save everyone. And make no mistake, there will be moments like that. And you should never forget those you fail…but you also can't forget those you save as well. The people you failed aren't alive, not because you couldn't save them. But the people you did save are alive because you succeeded. Never forget that."
Hansel gently placed the letter in Ruby's hand before rising to his feet. He started walking away before stopping at the door.
"I know it hurts…but if you want my advice on how to handle this pain?" Hansel looked back at her. "Never forget either. The lives you couldn't save and the lives you could save; because at the end of the day, being a Huntsman is about both. Never forget both and keep moving forward Ruby…and above all else, don't become like me. It's not a good look for you. The truth is…I like you more when you're you. And I think I'll like you as you even more once you're more mature, more worldly. And you will be both of those things as long as you keep moving forward. You will, because I'm going to be there every step of the way. If you'll still have me…I'll take responsibility as someone you look up to and continue to guide you…and do it right this time."
Ruby had no response for that. Hansel sighed, knowing that was the best he could do for Ruby now. He said everything he needed to say. Everything he could say to make things better. Now, it was on her to actually get better.
This is where you prove yourself better than me, Kid. Hansel thought to himself as he exited her bedroom. Can you choose to rise above this like I can't? Can you choose not to numb yourself like I have?
Ruby watched her teacher leave. She clutched the letter tightly as the door closed behind him. She started to shake again.
"You jerk," she muttered, "you picked now of all times to finally call me 'Ruby'?"
Hansel calmly walked through Ruby's house, intent on leaving with little to no fuss. However, upon walking out the front door, he was stopped by a man clearing his throat. He turned to see Taiyang gazing outwards at the horizon.
"Mr. Xiao Long…" Hansel said curtly.
"Leaving without saying goodbye, huh?" Taiyang noted.
"...I've never been good with such things." Hansel replied. "Though I imagine you don't plan to let me leave just yet, huh?"
"Think of it as an impromptu parent-teacher conference." Taiyang said to him. Hansel sighed. Taiyang continued, "Besides, I think you and I have a few things we should probably say to each other before you go."
Hansel knew he was right. There were some things he needed to get off of his chest. So, he sighed and started speaking.
"Why did you let me into your house?" Hansel asked. "Why would you let me anywhere near either of your daughters? You should…you should hate me, Sir."
"...And why, pray tell, should I hate you?" Taiyang asked curiously.
"Don't bullshit me!" Hansel snapped before calming himself, remembering he was still a guest. "Come on…I know your oldest daughter's a fucking blabbermouth. There's no way in hell she didn't talk about what my first day teaching was like. I put your youngest in the infirmary, all because I lost my temper over being taken out of active duty to teach, of all things. And here you are talking to me like I didn't do any of that shit. I hurt your daughter. Why are you pretending like I didn't? Hate me! Hit me! Do literally anything but be hospitable! Please…it'd be easier for me if you did…"
Taiyang looked at Hansel. His expression however showed nothing but pity. Hansel could not help but wonder if that was even worse. Taiyang then sighed.
"I did hate you at first when I heard what happened. Hell, I almost took the next flight to Beacon so that I could snap your neck like a twig. It took Qrow talking me off a ledge to stop me." Taiyang admitted. "So, I did the next best thing. I called Ruby so that I could talk things out with her and see what she wanted to do. And she told me without hesitation that she wanted to stay and give you a chance. I asked her how she could even think of that, but then she said something that…well, it made me proud of her as her father. She said…"
"Dad, if I cut everyone out of my life for hurting me in some way…I wouldn't have Weiss or Blake as friends. Maybe it's different with him…but I don't wanna just cut him out of my life when he wants to try and make things right. I have two wonderful friends because I gave them both a second chance. So what's wrong with giving a teacher who wants to do better a second chance?"
Hansel's eyes widened as Taiyang finished quoting Ruby. He knew that Ruby had committed to giving him a second chance after that disastrous first day. But to hear just how committed she was…it almost made him cry right then and there.
"I'm so sorry I hurt your daughter." Hansel said softly. "I'm so sorry I failed her as her teacher. If I had prepared her better…she might be handling this trauma better."
"No, it's not your fault. It's no one's fault…except for the bastard who traumatized her of course." Taiyang sighed. "Ruby's her mother's daughter. And Summer…she was the same. Always stressed over every life she couldn't save. I could never blame you, not after everything I've heard about you since that first day of teaching."
"...What do you mean?"
"Now look who's playing dumb and bullshitting the other?" Taiyang smiled knowingly. "My girls are smart. Both knew it was best to keep me in the know since that first day of yours. I know everything you've done for the students at that school since…Ruby in particular."
"I…" Hansel trailed off.
"You asked why I don't hate you? It's simple. You saved my little girl's life twice now, Professor Kobalt." Taiyang smiled at him. "I won't forget that. Ever. If you're looking for condemnation–for whatever reason–I'm sorry but you won't find it here."
"I…" Hansel could only repeat. Taiyang's words had shocked him into silence.
"Don't you think you've punished yourself enough?" Taiyang gently asked him. "And not just about Ruby, but in general? Because everything I've heard from you since your first day teaching tells me you're a far better man than you clearly give yourself credit for…and the fact you came all this way just to try and comfort Ruby only confirms it."
"But…but…"
"Look, just stop, okay? Just stop." Taiyang shook his head, now looking sternly at him. "If you really want Ruby to get better, you need to lead by example too and start taking care of yourself as well. You need to start looking at yourself and acting like you deserve to be happy if you want the people you're trying to help to feel the same about themselves. Maybe that attitude flew when you fought alone this past year…but you're a teacher now, a role model to students. You don't need to just take responsibility for them, you need to take responsibility for yourself as well."
"...Why the hell do people keep telling me to take responsibility?" Hansel sighed, remembering his chat with Gardenia earlier. Taiyang smiled.
"Well, maybe it's because we know better?" He chuckled. "But in all seriousness…if two or more people tell you that maybe you need to work on something for your benefit…don't you think you should at least consider it?"
"I…don't know." Hansel admitted before taking a deep breath. "But…I do know that I don't ever want to see your daughter like that again, Sir."
Taiyang smiled at Hansel's words. Hansel took a deep breath before continuing.
"I…can't stand her ideals. I think they're hopelessly naive. The idea of saving this fucked up world is just…it's never gonna happen." Hansel proclaimed. "However…I also don't want her to give up on it either because it's a part of who she is. Instead…I just want her to mature into being able to handle the disappointments that come with her lofty ambitions…and have the strength to get back up after every failure. I just…hope that if there's one good thing to come out of all of this…she now understands how to handle these kinds of trauma. Because the life she wants to lead…she's going to get hurt more."
"I know," Taiyang admitted, "but we both know that the pain that comes with life is not an excuse to not live it. I think that's a lesson you need to learn too."
"...Have a nice rest of your day, Mr. Xiao Long." Hansel said, finally dismissing himself from the conversation.
"Sure I can't convince you to stay for a drink or something?" Taiyang asked kindly.
"No, I've intruded enough." Hansel shook his head as he walked away. Taiyang sighed.
Guess I owe you a drink, Qrow. You were right about him after all. He's a good kid. He just needs help. A lot of it. At that moment, Yang stepped out of the door.
"Did Teach seriously walk out?" Yang could not believe it.
"It's fine, Yang." Taiyang assured her. "I know he had a nice chat with Ruby, just as we had a nice chat afterwards. And I'm sure whatever he had to say…it was what she needed to hear."
"...I hope your optimism is well-placed, Dad. I hate seeing her like this."
"Me too, Pumpkin." Taiyang sighed. "What were you up to while we were chatting?"
"Sending some messages. Maybe it's rude to expect our friends to drop everything for her sake…but they deserve to know that Ruby's going through stuff and could use some support." Yang replied. Meanwhile, Hansel continued his journey away from the Xiao Long-Rose household. He found his gaze drifting to his sword.
Take responsibility huh? Both for my sake and for the sake of my students too, huh? Hansel thought to himself. But if I do…will I still be a warrior? Will I still be the Huntsman I need to be? What…what am I? What am I becoming? What am I meant to be?
Huntsmen? Demon? Or Teacher?
AN: Okay. A lot to unpack here. So first off, it's best to get this out of the way and make it as clear as possible: Gretel Kobalt is batshit insane. She's basically Camilla from Fire Emblem Fates if Camilla's obsession with Corrin wasn't played for laughs. This nutcase was in her underwear, stroking a picture of her younger brother when he was around 9 or 10 years old. God, just typing it makes me shudder. There are moments when this story earns its M-rating. That scene in the beginning was one of them, just because you're left wondering just how much would Gretel have done had Giovanni not entered her room to talk business.
Meanwhile, we've an extremely character focused chapter on our main protagonist (Ruby Rose) and our deuteragonist (Hansel Kobalt). You would not believe the difficulties of writing that chapter. I had to find the right balance of Hansel trying to comfort and encourage Ruby in a way that felt in character while also showcasing his growth as a person after nearly 80 chapters of content. Also, I had to balance that with the goal of keeping Ruby who she is, but also as a girl who is forced to rapidly mature and become more worldly with her ideals. Hopefully the end-product was good.
And to top it all off, we have Taiyang showcasing some damn fine grace in forgiving Hansel for his past transgressions while simultaneously offering him probably some of the best life advice he has had in years.
There's a reason I call Wild Hunt a story of healing, first and foremost. I don't consider it an "edgelord fantasy" or anything of the sort. It's a story of healing. Yeah, sure it's the darkest story I've put on FF yet. But that doesn't make it any less a story of healing.
So, I hope everyone enjoyed this chapter. I'll see you all next time.