"The partially, nearly Naked Gun 3 : 'They Saved Crumpf's Brain'..."
Summary: Frank Drebbin is out of retirement and on the case when he learns the fanatical former president and loser candidate Fred Crumpf may not be quite as dead as he left him and he and/or his crazies including his family threaten the newly elected President Woodrowmina Wilson.
Of course, Nordberg is no longer on the squad because of, well, we never talk about that...
Part LI...
The hallway outside the interrogation lab...
"So, Doctor...?" Marjorie spoke into phone. "You're saying you located a nanoscale device in Mrs. Hocken's brain...And successfully removed it?"
"I'll break Morene's pretty face even if he looks like that nice Mr. Roarke and is as tough as Khan Singh." Ed noted grimly to Frank.
"And your analysis confirms it's a modified version of Victor Ludwig's control devices?" Marjorie continued.
"Interesting..." Frank noted. "Was it a turn on/off sex thing, you suppose?", to Hocken who frowned.
"Boys, please?" Marjorie, waving for quiet. "Doctor, can you tell...It wasn't? So Morene was keeping it as a just-in-case thing, you think? Oh, really...?" she told the phone, considering.
"That advanced...?" she asked.
"'Just-in-case'? You mean, she'd've...?" Ed stared.
"No, Ed." Frank placed hand on his shoulder. "It would have been Morene shooting you or me, not Edna. Or maybe his assistant giving the command."
"I never did trust that Tattoo guy..." Ed noted.
"I meant Dr. Goebbels-Banner but..." Frank began.
"Doctor...?" Marjorie, pensive. "Do you think you could deactivate the device in a way that might convince Morene it's still functioning and reimplant it? And could we receive signals coming to it?"
"Say, what?" Ed blinked.
Marjorie putting up a hand...Please...
"Reimplant it? In Edna?! No!" Ed tried.
"It's all right, Ed..." Marjorie cautioned. "Only if there's no danger to Mrs. Hocken, Doctor? Good...Ok...Well, then..."
I thought we were the good guys who don't experiment on people...Ed stared.
"...If Mrs. Hocken consents. Tell her I think it could be very helpful. I would like to speak to her, actually...And you, too, Ed." She turned from phone to Hocken.
"So would I." Ed nodded.
...
"So here it is..." Marjorie, seated in a conference room, with Ed and Frank seated by her, speakerphone on table. "The doctor believes this version of the device in Edna is a prototype, an improvement by Morene on his father's original control device to allow more sophisticated control."
"Tested on my Edna..." Ed grimly noted.
"I'm ok, Ed." Edna's voice on speaker. "Thank God he didn't use it."
"You're sure of that, Doctor?" Marjorie called to phone.
"Oh, yes. The device was only turned on briefly, probably to test that it didn't kill the subject." The reply from phone.
"What?! Then why put it back?" Ed asked.
"It might give us a way to track Morene." Marjorie noted. "But also, this version allows specialized commands...Morene intended to use it to control large numbers of people without the complexities of the brain transfers as well as the need for donors, it's all part of their scheme to rule the world. Edna was his test subject here, as well as with the test surgery, though he didn't activate. Perhaps he felt her brain had been too damaged by his and the other doctors' manipulations when developing the transplantation technique or...Perhaps he really was waiting, to use it as a last resort to deal with you and Ed, Frank." She eyed Frank.
"Have Edna blow our brains out?" Frank nodded.
"Better than having her..." Ed began.
"Ed?!" Edna's voice.
"Sorry, honey." He called.
"But, with this version, you not only have an assassin..." Marjorie noted. "You can have a spy, a compelled follower, someone who'll follow orders and report back. Is that right, Doctor?"
"Oh, yes...They'd be a perfect spy. Only the transplant could do better, in terms of an independent agent." The doctor's reply.
"We're going to need to screen all our people again." Marjorie sighed. "I take it this is even harder to detect than the transplant?"
"I'm afraid so...The device is injected into the brainstem at the spinal column. Quite easily concealed. It was only that we were continually examining Mrs. Hocken to monitor her progress that we found it."
"All right, send the details and I'm first to be examined. We can't take any risks." Marjorie eyed Ed and Frank. "But if the device is reimplanted in Mrs. Hocken, it could be altered first to conceal its deactivation and its transmissions to us? We'd know if Morene sent commands?"
"Also, quite easy." The doctor's voice.
"Ummn..." Edna's voice... "Commands? I don't know if I want..."
"Nobody'll make you do this, Edna." Ed firmly.
"Would it help?" Edna's voice. "I don't see..."
"We'd be able to track back to Morene, but also..." Marjorie paused. "If we could capture him, we could perhaps convince the others that you'd been programmed by him."
Ed and Frank staring...
...
"I know it's asking a great deal, but to have an agent inside their organization...When we don't know how far Morene's gone with their plans while he was trusted..." Marjorie noted to the others and the speakerphone.
"Edna? An agent?" Ed stared.
"Me?! An agent?!" Edna's voice, eager.
"What? No...Honey, you're still recovering from traumatic brain damage from surgery. Not even recovering perse, your brain's patched up like a Christmas tree with experimental meds." Ed noted.
"And a number of the light sets with half the bulbs burnt out..." Frank suggested.
"Well, how am I gonna get better if we don't nail these Nazis and bring em in?" Edna's voice replied. "The guys here told me all the Nazi docs in the network here who know the technique were murdered. I can't just sit and wait to go ga-ga again."
"It was more like you were a sex-crazed maniac." Frank noted, helpfully.
"Anyway, what if Morene's already escaped the US?" Ed insisted. "He'd have no reason to turn Edna on."
"Ed..." Edna's voice, a bit rueful...
"I think Ed means turn on the implant and give you orders not make you crave hot passionate sweaty adulterous sex with Morene or other men, Edna." Frank offered.
Ed eyeing him.
Well, yeah, that is what I meant.
"If he escapes he'll want information...If we catch him, we can have her claim to the others he activated her. For giving her orders, I mean." Marjorie, a bit embarrassed at end.
"And then, what?" Ed asked, eyeing Marjorie. "Wait a mo?! The others? Are you suggesting...?"
Well...Marjorie hesitated.
"Then it's Agent Edna Hocken on 'Mission: Impossible!" Edna's voice, cheery. "It'll be like that time you were on stakeout and the guy started firing as I brought you supper and I had to hide in the car with you and Frank...God, what a rush!"
"Edna?! These are Nazis! Well, some are neo-, but still! And they're out somewhere in the Pacific, on some supposedly deserted island/old Nazi base." Ed noted. "Do we even know yet where it is?" he turned to Marjorie.
"Not quite, yet. But frankly, if she were sent orders...They might include a destination." Marjorie, a bit hesitant.
"You want to use my Edna to find these Nazi bastards?!" Ed glared.
"Now, honey." Edna's voice..."Ed, I used to be an actress. There's nothing a bunch of Nazis could throw at me worse than Harvey Weinstein."
...