Jun blearily woke up, someone had knocked him out during a midnight Burrito run.

"Look you, m'fing borghead! I'm telling you this isn't the Oni." came the scratchy half-digitized voice of a 'stromganger.

"But Come on man, he's got all the right implants, he's an f'ing warborg."

"Yeah so he's Kamikaze, but he ain't the Oni!"

"How the hell do you know that, f'ing lacehead?!"

"look you gotta know what they say on the streets about the Oni."

"What?"

"Some say, people involved in the war right, people who got a real good luck at him during the peace-treaty negotiations right, they say he's got a full face tattoo of his own face, on his face."

Jun blinked... What the hell?

"That's just stupid, No the Oni is easy to spot, right cause he's got experimental biomods right that sheds his 'ganic skin like a snake, so he's got no scars."

Jun started testing his restraints, these guys were just... stupid...

"No! The Oni right doesn't even have any 'ganic skin or RealSkinn they say his modskin has the same texture of a dolphin's, and that, if you turn your radio to 88,4 you can actually hear his thoughts"

Jun blinked... that was just... so goddamn stupid.

"So we can test that? just tune our internals to 88.4, and we can hear his thoughts!"

Jun finally got enough leverage that he could break the restraints... he did so exploding out of the seat and taking out the third stromer who was watching the window, by throwing him out the window.

"Hey you goddamn laceheads! I am the Oni!" he exploded towards them.

"Run! Remember what they say, the Oni can only turn North or South due to a compass implant, so go east or west!"

Jun kept after them through the stacks of the warehouse.

"He's still following us!" One of them broke off and jumped out the nearby window, well he'd catch up with him later. The other one ran up the stairs towards the office.

He stopped for a moment and asked, "I'm faster than you, stronger than you and I'm bulletproof to that peashooter you got. Stop running, you're just gonna die tired."

The Maelstromer took a loud hit of Black Lace, "If you really are the real Oni, I'm safe as houses! Some of guys who've fought him say the Oni doesn't understand stairs!"

Jun snerked, "The only people who've walked away from fighting me are Royce and Brick! Sure as shit they didn't tell you anything!" and with that he ran up the stairs and punched through the office door before tearing the gonk out of the office and throwing him down to the ground-floor three stories below.

Jun left the building muttering about how he hated Mondays...

- 2 days later, All Foods -

"I hate Mondays..." came out of the speakers...

Dum Dum looked at the vid, he looked at the f'king idiot sitting on the sofa bitching about the Oni.

Brick was expecting an answer on whether they went to war with the Claws again.

DumDum took a hit of his Lace... "It's not Him, it's a good fake, but that 'borg ain't the Oni."

"How'd you know that?" asked the Gonk.

DumDum, Brick and Royce all looked at him, and said in unison "Everybody knows The Oni likes Mondays."