The fifth challenge of the season had the nineteen contestants outside the central academy building in the large expanse of grass on the upper end of campus. The skies were gray, without much sunlight to brighten things up. On both sides of this end of campus were tents. For whatever reason, Mercutio was dressed up as a Russian general, clad in a green war uniform.

"Good morning, students, and welcome to today's major. Can anyone guess what it is?"

"History?" Noah assumed.

"You're surely astute, Noah. Surely indeed."

Beside him, Cody felt himself trembling. The piercing gaze from Mercutio that came next did nothing to help him.

Confessional - Cody

"Everytime Noah opens his mouth around Mercutio, I'm terrified he's gonna say something he shouldn't. I should've just kept dodging his questions."

End of confessional

"That's Russian war general apparel, isn't it?" Matcha asked.

"Someone's educated."

She smiled, pride in herself shining through. "Took a lot of that to get my PhD."

"You have a PhD and you're, what, sixteen?" Athena remarked.

"Twenty-three."

"You must be so smart! Wow! We're lucky to have you on our team."

Mercutio forced a smile. "Thank you for your interruption, Athena. For today's challenge, we're going to be playing a game of capture the flag. Sort of. See, what we're also doing in this challenge is reenacting a famous battle from Russian history. Is anyone here familiar with the Battle of Aslanduz?"

Noah nodded. "That was a nighttime slaughter led by... Pyotr Kotlyarevsky, correct?"

"1815?" Matcha assumed. "No, no, no-1812."

"Yes, both of you."

"Nerds," Jayshawn muttered.

"Mother Russia and Iran, once called Persia, have been fighting wars against each other since the mid 17th century," Mercutio explained, pacing in front of the teams. "Religion was a central ideological justification for these wars. Additionally, each side vied for control of the Caucasus, a region in the midst of the two aforementioned countries and a few others. The Battle of Aslanduz was a surprise attack where, in the middle of the night, 2,300 Russian soldiers ambushed 30,000 Persian troops and slaughtered them. It was astounding, really, given the numbers difference. Now, this numbers difference, I think, is relevant for how this season has been going thus far. Grads, you've lost three members, while the Dropouts haven't lost one."

"Boom," Kobe mimed a mic drop.

"Because of that, the Dropouts will play the part of the Persian troops. The tent on the eastern end of the campus belongs to the Dropout squad, while the Grad squad will be tasked with ambushing the Dropouts and taking away their flag." Mercutio gazed across the crowd of contestants, noticing that Lauren appeared ready to burst at the seams, one of her arms rose high in the air. "Yes, Lauren?"

"Ooh! Do we get to mortally injure our opponents? Do we get to do finger paints with blood?"

Mercutio chuckled. "I'm sorry to disappoint you, but there will not be any killing in this challenge."

Damien let out a breath. "That's a relief. Isn't that relieving, guys?"

Lauren spooked him, popping up from behind him with her hands on his shoulders. "No!"

"But, you will be given bayonets to use during the challenge. And here's our designated supplier now." The host pointed out Tracy staggering towards them, obviously having trouble with all the bayonets he held in his arms. "Thank you, Tracy."

"Let me help you with those," Caleb offered, then uncomfortably handed out bayonets to each member of the cast with Tracy.

Confessional - Caleb

"That is a strange feeling..."

End of confessional

The majority of the cast expressed expressions of disturbance; these bayonets were genuine, the blades at the end of the guns' muzzles sharp and ready to split open flesh, just as a real bayonet would. Lauren, of course, was quite giddy to be handed hers. She leaped up and down and giggled to herself.

Confessional - Kobe

"I think Scary Girl might actually be for real about the whole bloodlust thing. Good to know."

End of confessional

"These, uh, sure aren't props," Matcha murmured.

"Perceptive girl," Mercutio commented. "Be careful with those; as Matcha has discovered, these aren't faux. They're the real deal, and you can get hurt if you use them improperly."

Lauren, exuberant, fanned herself with her eyelashes batting. "Oh, goodness... Oh, my word... Slow down."

"This chick is actually fucking insane," Holden laughed.

"I don't understand what the point of having these is if you're warning us about the danger of having them," Matcha mentioned. "Why don't we use fake ones? Or, like, sticks?"

"Did Chris McLean use bayonets?" Damien wondered.

"Hey!" Mercutio snapped. "This is my show now. Refrain from mentioning that hack's name." His anger quelled as he faced Matcha, while Noah stroked his chin, the moment not lost on him. "You see, Matcha, the use of real bayonets allows for a boost in our ratings, even if we're not actually going to use them."

Confessional - Noah

"Doesn't that sound just like 'he who shall not be named'? I'm onto you, Mercutio."

End of confessional

Mercutio's explanation did little to calm Matcha's nerves, but he continued anyway. "The challenge will begin by nightfall. Therefore, the rest of the day is yours; Grads, you can conspire and figure a way to plan an invasion and a taking of the flag that you can then bring to your tent on the western end of campus. Dropouts, you'll want to discuss how you defend your flag."

"So, if we start with the flag, how do we win?" asked Caleb.

"Once nightfall hits, there will begin a thirty minute timer. Dropouts, your task for this evening is to keep the Grads from taking the flag back to their tent. There will be a small hill in the center of each tent for the flag pole to be placed in. If the Grads place the pole in their hill, they win. So long as that doesn't happen within the time limit, it doesn't matter whether the pole is in the Dropouts' hill or not; they will still win the challenge."

"Is there a challenge part two we should be aware of?" Bowie asked.

"There is not, that is it. All right, teams. You have many hours until nightfall; start cooking up some plans. Grads, I'd take extra care not to waste this time; you have too few members not to. That is all. Dismissed."

Later on, still during the day, the Dropouts gathered up in a classroom within the academy building. Athena, Caleb, Holden, Jill, Iko, Lauren, Kobe, Queen and Damien sat in various seats with Matcha standing before them like a teacher might. She did a head count of everyone in the room.

"We're missing MK. Anyone seen her?"

"She so short, man, I gotta work extra hard just to see her regularly," Kobe replied.

"Let's just start without her," Holden urged. "We're in a good position now to keep taking members off the Grads' team, so long as we take the time to come up with something good. We don't need MK for that."

"But, isn't it right to wait until everyone's around?" Athena wondered, a fair bit of innocence in her tone. "That's the nice thing to do."

"Just shut up, Athena."

"Hey, man, relax, would you?" Caleb fired back. "She didn't do anything wrong."

"Fuck off, white knight. Just because you've got muscles and a jawline and all that shit doesn't mean she's instantly gonna fall for you, so why don't you give it a rest?"

He scoffed. "What are you talking about? I'm just telling you to stop being an asshole to her. It doesn't go any deeper than that."

"Sure, man, I'm sure it doesn't."

Caleb opened his mouth to say more, but Matcha stopped him. "Okay, enough. Guys, really? Let's talk strategy for the challenge or let's not talk at all."

"That in itself would be the bigger challenge for frumpy," Queen jeered.

"You're gonna be follicly challenged by the time you're in your mid 20s if you keep fucking up your hair so badly, you oompa loompa-lookin' freak," Holden shot back.

Queen's seat skidded against the ground as she practically jumped to her feet, a glare spread across her face. "You listen here, you-"

"Guys, guys, please-" Athena begged.

"Shut up, I said!" Holden snapped.

"Hey! What did I just say?" Matcha complained.

Kobe got to his feet. "I'm takin' a breather. If MK can miss the talk, so can I."

Matcha scoffed as he went. "Well, that's not how we should see it! In that case, we all might as well go do whatever we want!"

"Like violent horse play?" Lauren suggested.

"Don't let her horse play with me again," Damien begged.

As voices overlapped, arguments flowing into one another, Jill rested her face in her palms, propped up by her elbows on her desk. She glanced over to see Iko beside her, the same quiet discomfort on his face. They were each at least able to smile over that shared common ground. Then, everyone was stunned into quieting down once Matcha yelled.

"Hey! Everyone, enough! That's it, we're done! Queen, sit back down. Caleb, turn back around. Holden, either contribute to our strategy or get out of this classroom. Lauren, stop trying to touch Damien and keep your hands to yourself."

She glanced at the crowd of eight, now silent, some disgruntled, others surprised.

"Are we done? Good. Now then, let's talk battle tactics."

Confessional - Damien

"I didn't know Matcha had that in her. It was well-worth the feeling of almost peeing that it gave me."

Confessional - MK

During her confessional, MK was right up front and center with the camera, messing around with its wiring and whatnot.

"Move on out of the way, Brook. Hey, viewing world. Not here to confess; never gonna happen-but I am here to see about using this thing to my advantage. You can't see it, but there's a whole mess of cords and other random things that I'm gonna use like so: got this here phone that I stole from little miss tea leaf. If I'm right, I should be able to input the confessional feed into this phone, which is gonna make things a lot more interesting. Everything anyone says here will all be fed directly to me."

MK kept messing around with wiring, then she found a chip from within the camera that she inputted into the phone.

"You know, hacking into someone's phone isn't really as hard as you might guess. Just takes a little know-how..."

She did more configuring with the camera and the phone, until finally the phone lit up, turning on. Soon enough, MK was able to bring up confessionals at will. "Check this out." She held up a folder with frozen images of the other contestants in their confessionals. Skimming through it, she murmured, "Who should we check in with first? Hmm... How about psychopathic ol' Scary Girl?"

MK clicked one of the videos in the folder, full-screening a clip of Lauren in the confessional, saying in her squeaky voice, "Goodness, me... If Damien continues to scream like that... Oh, excuse me. I'm- I'm a little worked up all of the sudden, excuse me."

An amused smile crept up onto MK's face. "I'm starting to think that there isn't a screening process to get on this show. Let's do another one."

She browsed through the library, eventually clicking on a confessional of Iko's. "A girl willing to help out her fellow girl? Now, that's what I'm talking about. Man, that Jill just seems so cool. So cool..."

"Oh, Iko. Crushing, mister? Ooh, this is gonna be fun!"

End of confessionals

Kobe stepped out the front doors of the academy, taking a breath and stretching as he felt the sunlight hit his skin. Judging from the clouds they experienced earlier, he figured it wouldn't last long. He drew a comb from a shirt pocket and brushed it through his afro, satisfied with the bounce back his hair gave him. Not far off, Bowie was leaned up on the academy, wearing heart-shaped shades as he relaxed with a knee propped up and his hands in his pockets. Kobe crossed the pavement to join him.

"Heya."

"S'up, homie? You look comfortable."

"Yep. Just taking a minute to chill before I have to deal with my team. Blech," Bowie mocked gagging.

"Heh, you too, huh? My team's something else, man."

"Oh, yeah?" Bowie let his shades dip down his nose.

Kobe chuckled. "That's a good look for you."

Bowie tried to keep from blushing, his eyes averting Kobe's gaze as he murmured back, "Thank you. So, do tell. What's your team like?"

He shrugged. "Well, let's see. There's my psychotic teammate Lauren. She's pretty cool."

"That a fact?"

"Yeah, man, I love chicks that can get down with funky-ass clown makeup and shit. A lot of the time there isn't much drama on my team, but Holden and Queen fight all the time, so there's that. Holden doesn't seem like he likes Athena that much, but she's just awkward, she doesn't mean to be. I notice she's getting close with Caleb, the dude who looks like he belongs on a yacht or something."

"He looks like he belongs on a date with me."

Kobe chuckled. "Ay, man, I probably shouldn't even be telling you all this."

"Oh, piddlefiff, I'm not gonna do anything schemy with it. Guess I'm just curious about... about you."

This seemed to amuse Kobe. "Yeah? Me, huh? Dawg, I'm just a bro with a fro. Ain't too much to see here."

"So you say, but people are almost always more interesting than they appear, right? So long as there's a brain in their skull."

"Not everybody fits that criteria. Look, man, I should probably get back to my team, but-"

"No, no, I won't keep you. Good luck tonight."

On his way back into the academy, Kobe momentarily turned around to reply, "You too, but just know you're not touchin' my flag."

"Whatever you say, Kobe."

"Later."

Confessional - Bowie

"You know, I was so distracted by Kobe that I forgot to take mental notes on his teammates' characteristics. That's not really like me... But, there's still plenty of time to learn all about them."

End of confessional

Following his confessional, Bowie stepped out of the library and headed down the hall for the academy's exit. Watching with a satisfied grin on her face, MK's stolen phone vibrated, then she clicked the screen, opening up a video of Bowie. "You know, I was so distracted by Kobe that I forgot to take mental notes on his teammates' characteristics."

"Aren't you just so chatty, Bowie?" MK murmured, then snickered.

Confessional - MK

MK thumbed through the confessional folder on the stolen phone. "Seems a little strange, but I'm not seeing a single confessional from Stephen. That guy must have the same strategy as me. Speaking of which... what the fuck am I doing here right now?"

End of confessional

Bowie entered the auditorium to greet his teammates, the seven others readying up to discuss the challenge. Jayshawn was sprawled out in a relaxed sitting position in Mercutio's usual spot during diploma ceremonies. Londyn sat in Fish's lap while he nuzzled his face against her neck, delighting her to no end. Zee slurped down a soda.

"I'm back, and o-kay, Londyn and Fish."

Cody prodded Zee's side. "Hey, man, where'd you get that drink?"

Zee stared at it with his eyes wide and frightened. "I don't know..." [1]

"Fish, can you unlatch from Londyn's neck?" Bowie prompted.

"Maybe if you can unlatch from my ass, but only maybe."

"Noah, you seemed to be the most knowledgeable about Mercutio's little history lesson. Do you have any ideas about how we do this challenge?"

The bookworm cleared his throat. "As a matter of fact, yeah, but I'm gonna need to brush up on my knowledge. Bowie, head to the library and find me The Art of War by Sun Zi, Cody, find On War by Carl von Clausewitz, and Londyn, find me Strategy: A History by Lawrence Freedman."

As Bowie and Cody headed out, Londyn removed herself from Fish's lap with heavy pouting. She muttered, "A 'please' would be really cool," as she strutted off.

"Damn, check out her ass jiggle as she walks away," Fish remarked, eyeing her down with a grin.

"Fish, is it even conceptually possible you'd stop being who you are?" Noah grumbled.

Fish's eyes wandered from Noah, Stephen, Zee, and Jayshawn's as he responded. "You know, she's the only girl on the team anymore. Hmm..."

"Whatchu thinkin'?" Jayshawn asked.

"As an amorphous blob once said: fellas, I may not have a brain, but I have an idea."

"Oh, no!" Zee cried. "Does this mean we're gonna have to learn about periods and ovaries and the fallopian deferens? We've gotta make her feel like we're in the know, right?"

"Hey, she ever asks," Fish started, raising his hands up, "you didn't hear this from me, but it's possible that we could maybe... remind her of that fact, if ever we need someone to, uhm, do something for us, you could say."

"The hell are you implying?" Noah retorted.

"Nothing, nothing! I'm not 'implying' anything. If anything, I'm more insinuating that she could become an asset to the team if she were to be reminded of her place as the lone female among several males. You know, a girl as hot as her, they learn to be afraid of guys from a young age. Now, all I'm suggesting is that we could, you know... show her what there is to be afraid of. If ever we needed to."

Zee tilted his head, feeling gears turning in his mind. "Wait. Yo. Yo... That's, like, not cool, man."

"Come on, Zee, like you've never thought about it," Fish chuckled, prodding him.

"Nah, brah, never. I love women, and I love it when a woman feels safe, yo, and that's on gang gang."

"Homeboy," Jayshawn pressed his face in his palms. "Dawg. If even I have to tell you not to be a prick, you know you got some fuckin' problems."

"Probably should've left that one on the cutting room floor, eh, Fish?" Noah retorted.

"Yeah, what exactly is that supposed to imply?" Fish questioned.

Noah let a sly grin show. "Oh, nothing, nothing, I'm not implying anything-I'm more insinuating that you're a misogynist."

"Piss off, Noah. Stephen? Come on, back me up, Stevie."

Stephen stared right through him, not saying a word, the lone dark eye you could see through his bangs empty. Fish scoffed and crossed his arms. "Tough crowd, I guess."

[1] - Technically a stolen joke, but it's one of my favorite Zee moments in the reboot

Dropouts: Caleb, Damien, MK, Scary Girl, Athena, Holden, Iko, Jill, Kobe, Matcha, Queen

Grads: Cody, Noah, Bowie, Zee, Fish, Jayshawn, Londyn, Stephen

Some quick OC descriptions:

Athena: orangey-blonde, orange contacts, black and white dress

Holden: long, scraggly hair, heavyset, short, leather jacket

Iko: slim-fat, short, stylish overcoat and vest

Jill: athletic build, red hair, tan skin, emerald green eyes

Kobe: tall, big afro

Matcha: brunette, business casual

Queen: purple hair

Fish: typical influencer look

Jayshawn: fit, muscular, dreads, gym tank/shorts

Londyn: brunette, face tattoos, gorgeous features

Stephen: early 2000s emo look

Mercutio: chiseled face, suit, wide-framed

Tracy: slim, suspenders/bowler hat

Brook: silver hair, oversized cardigan