Following the first day of the bet, Clarke watched on in a strange type of fascinating intrigue as the people around her revealed themselves to be clueless idiots. She dreads to think how this group managed to save the human race multiple times. It must have been pure luck or divine intervention because everyone here is just so blind.
Blind to the point Clarke has sworn multiple times that her friends have to be messing with them. There is no other reason as to how she and Niylah have been getting away with this for three days and no one has blinked twice at them. Never mind calling them out on it.
Instances that couldn't be simply brushed off as them just being close friends. Comments that when right over the tops of people's heads and actions that drew a few eyes but nothing else.
The whole thing leads to Clarke having a small rant in her tent with Niylah as the other woman watches on in amusement as she is slowly losing her mind. This is the start of her slow but long overdue descent into madness. It's not even about the bet anymore. She is simply worried about how oblivious everyone truly is.
"I mean Raven I can accept as she had her mind fried by an emp like me but still even before that she never realised; I was flirting with her. Octavia too. Which again I can understand. She had only just come out from the floor and her attention was on the guys, not me and it was over quickly. But HOW... How is no one seeing us? I'm pretty sure I could just kiss you in front of everyone and they would be just like oh Clarke and Niylah are practicing CPR how nice. It's driving me insane."
"I can tell." Niylah manages to reply in a somewhat steady voice as she is barely able to contain herself from bursting out laughing as Clarke paces up and down the small space of their tent. Hands moving in rapid succession to her words as she burns the restless energy residing in her.
Actions that normally Niylah finds as endearing as she does amusing but after a solid thirty spent watching Clarke wear a hole into their tent, she starts to feel a little sick. Niylah makes a mental note to make sure their bedroom in their new cabin has enough space for Clarke to be able to do this.
Or maybe a special hallway Clarke could claim to pace up and down when she gets overwhelmed with things.
After a few more minutes of Clarke's rants, Niylah finally puts an end to it having reached her limit. "Please stop pacing your starting to make me feel dizzy."
Clarke freezes instantly in her stride not even realising she was pacing to begin with. "Sorry." She mumbles in embarrassment before kneeling down on the furs next to Niylah. "But I do have a point."
Niylah silences whatever rant she was about to start upon again with a lingering kiss. "You do and I love that you're so passionate about things. But please can we go to bed now." She implores Clarke to settle down as the tiredness of the day begins to settle in.
"Right... sorry." Clarke quickly clambers under the covers as Niylah reaches up to turn their lantern off. Lying down on her back Clarke stares off into the darkness thinking about other things her friends have missed.
Like the moment when she said Niylah was extremely cute when she's drunk as she jumps from spurting all the things she loves about Clarke to clinging on to her like a kola and refusing to budge even an inch to get into bed properly. The first time she met drunk Niylah, Clarke felt her heart melt. And that feeling hasn't left in all the times afterwards. Something else she admitted but no one seemed to take in the correct context. Nor did they understand what she was saying when-
Niylah's annoyed voice peaks through the silence interrupting Clarke's continued rant in her head. "Klark..." Niylah draws out in a quiet almost defeated voice. "Please stop thinking and hold me."
Scrambling to the side she throws herself around Niylah pushing up close to her and holding her tightly. Niylah instantly relaxes into her hold letting out a small sigh of contentment.
Guilt begins to claw its way through Clarke at knowingly causing some discomfort to Niylah. "Sorry." She apologizes again pressing a kiss to Niylah's shoulder in penance for her inactions.
The two of them lay there comfortably wrapped around each other waiting for sleep to take them. Yet Clarke can't turn off her mind. It's still whizzing with more questions and new disbelief. Each one adding a new pricking to her skin as she begins to feel fidgety.
Back at the dropship, there was a hyper fixation on her and Finn. Everyone knew about them even when they weren't a thing everyone knew what was going on. Sometimes the camp knew more about what was happening then she was.
Yet here it is the opposite. It seems more like people are going out of their way to purposely ignore what is happening. Not that she wants everyone hyper fixated on her and Niylah that would be uncomfortable and invasive. But she would like their relationship to at least be acknowledged like the other ones in the camp.
She wants to be able to talk to Raven and Octavia without feeling like she's holding on to a huge secret. She wants to poke fun and Murphy and then have him turn the tables on her. Wants to sit with Miller and talk to each other about their significant halves with fear or remorse.
She doesn't want to hide the way she feels about Niylah. Which again that isn't what she's doing but with how everyone else is acting it feels like she is.
Biting her lips she struggles to understand how this is causing her more stress than war with Trikru or the mountain. How is this the thing that is finally tipping her over the scales after she survived the end of the world. That doesn't make any sense.
They remain like that for a few more minutes until Niylah groans loudly pulling away from Clarke who whines at the sudden distance. Niylah reaches back up to turn the lantern back on pulling herself up into a sitting position and crossing her arms. "Neither of us are sleeping it seems until you've got this all out of your system." Niylah glares at her half serious half amused and lovingly. "Rant away." She says with a flick of her hand.
A wave of adoration washes over her at Niylah's understanding. It isn't the first time this has happened, but she loves that Niylah understands her enough to let her do this without growing annoyed or frustrated as others have done in the past.
"I love you." Clarke gleefully admits pressing a peck to Niylah's lips promising to make up to her another day before diving right back into her tirade with all the new points she has thought about while trying to sleep. All the while Niylah sits there watching her in endearment shaking her head.
The next day Raven had grabbed her and Octavia for some original hundred girly times as she pointed out was long overdue after the day's tasks were done and dragged her and O away from everyone out to the creak where the three of them were lounging around.
Echo's response to being excluded from this little get together was to grab Niylah and Gaia to do the same somewhere else. Emori was invited but she decided to spend the time with Murphy instead. Everyone could guess what they were up to.
Yet when she and Niylah do the same no one bats an eye. A blessing and a curse really.
She assumed Raven wanted to talk to them about something important given how she forcibly dragged her and Octavia away in a frenzy. But no all she wanted to do was lounge around and chill. Slightly dramatic in getting them here but worth it. It's been forever since the three of them just hung out with each other with that doesn't include war planning or saving humanity from alienation.
"You're an artist right Clarke," Raven asks in the middle of a totally unrelated conversation.
The question catches her off guard as she looks between Raven and O before answering. "Yeah." Art is one of the only things to help keep her mind from falling apart from everything and most people by now know when she is drawing to leave her alone. With the exception of Niylah of course.
Another point relaying the truth of their relationship which just flies over everyone's heads.
"Do you think you could design a tattoo for me?" Raven asks lying on her back and staring up at the clear blue skies.
Clarke takes back what she thought about Raven not dragging out here for something important. That wasn't what she was expecting. But for once it's a nice surprise. Who knew they existed? "I'm sure I could." She affirms growing excited at the prospect of designing a tattoo. She hasn't done that before.
She has designed a clan symbol but that was more of a panicked we need something to wave around while meeting the twelve clans for the first time as they prepared for the mountain. She didn't really expect it to stick but it did.
Looking back if she had more time, she would have done a lot of things differently but like she said it was a rushed thing, and she was trying to keep it pretty simple but still different from the other clans. Maybe she can create a logo for them now.
Oh, and put it on a flag around their settlement and have it on a banner somewhere. That would be cool. She will ask Indra if that is possible later. Something to distract her from everything else. Looking back at Raven she pushes that thought to the back of her mind for now. "Can I ask why you want a tattoo?"
"Yeah, I've never heard you talk about getting one before," Octavia adds on equally as curious as to what caused the sudden shift.
Raven casually shrugs. "I just see everyone else's and think they are cool." That's fair. She had a similar thought the first time she saw Onya's and then the other grounders. Niylah's and Lexa's specially made her think about it.
But she didn't know what she could wear that would hold such a significance to her. Both Niylah, Lexa and even every grounder she met with had them designed to mean something important to them. A trial or tribulation they had to overcome, or something meant to honour their tribes or people who have died. The closest she came up with was the number one hundred across her inner wrist to remember the hundred she came down with.
However, just the three numbers didn't seem enough to remember everyone who died. She wanted something larger. Something more meaningful to her.
Lexa's was created for her conclave. A way to remember those who fell and remind her why she does what she does. The test of strength and will she had endured before coming into her role of the commander. Her resilience to live with what happened and to move forward.
Niylah's on the other hand was a symbol of her loyalty to Trikru. The mark of her tribe. The one she had chosen to follow and believe in. Having grown up with Trikru and Azegda parents with tensions between the two clans was higher than ever she was forced to pick to stand with one of the clans.
And she picked the clan of her father and the land they lived on.
Octavia's own tattoos follow the same route as most people. Their younger friend begins to open up about her own tattoos to them. How it made her feel accepted and feel like somebody when she was accepted into Trikru. How it was like finally finding her people. The acceptance in that after spending years of hiding who she was in fear of death.
Trikru gave her a sense of purpose and fulfilment and her tattoos are a mark of that. A reminder of who she is.
How her tattoos also helped her feel closer to Lincoln. That when she had them it felt like she still held on to a part of him. How they gave her the strength and courage to push forward despite all the setbacks and crises they faced. How sometimes she used to trace the ink and pretend it was him doing it as she used to do to his tattoos.
Clarke nods in agreement to that sentiment having done similar things in the past. Especially when things got tough. "I get that. Sometimes when I'm stressed or worried, I trace Niylah's. It helps soothe my mind. We both find it relaxing."
A flicker of a smile pokes at the corner of her lips at the memory of Niylah first admitting she likes it when Clarke does that. How that act seemed more intimate to the both of them then sex did.
During their time apart in the valley Clarke will admit she drew a replicate of Niylah's tattoo and when the nights were long and seemed unable to take a hold of her, she would trace the charcoal drawing in a similar manner.
It was the closest she got to Niylah without being near the woman. Niylah had laughed and called her a 'trijus' (sap) when she first admitted that. And yeah, it was pretty sappy but in her defence, the woman she loved was buried underground and hidden away from her for six years so she thinks she's allowed to be a little sappy when she missed so much.
Out of these two deep talks about tattoos and their meanings Clarke hates that she isn't surprised that the only thing Raven really lingered on was the fact that "Niylah has a tattoo." Raven asks inquisitively.
Holding back her sigh of disbelief she leans back on her hands. "Yeah, it's along her back."
Raven's head tilts in a confused manner. The way it does when she comes across a problem she can't immediately figure out. "So, you just stroke her back and she accepts." She asks with a hint of scepticism.
"I sometimes do it to help put her to sleep," Clarke admits with no sign of embarrassment over her and Niylah's actions. Why would she be? As Niylah's girlfriend, she has the right to trace her tattoo. Just Niylah would have that same right if the roles were reversed. "A win win for both of us."
"Wouldn't her shirt ruin the feeling though?" Raven asks still not seeing the obvious answer to that.
Clarke blinks once. Then again... then again for good measure.
Yet with each blink, the mystified looks on both Raven and Octavia's faces refuses to change. Swallowing her annoyance at their wilful blindness she manages to reply in a somewhat neutral tone hiding her irritation at them still not picking up on any of this. "I never said she was wearing a shirt. Most of the time she isn't when we're in bed anyways." Clarke utters waiting for them to say something. To click. Come on guys think. Why would Niylah be shirtless in their bed?
It's not a secret that both of them have laid with women before. Why would do woman who have openly talked about sleeping with other woman be in bed together without shirts on as one strokes the other's back.
Raven bites her lips thinking about something. And Clarke begins to feel hope rise in her chest. Come on Raven you're the smartest person alive. Put two and two together and you get four. Just do the simple maths. You can do it.
"I'm still not as comfortable with showing off my body as grounders are," Raven confesses looking off down the creak missing the moment Clarke's hopes and dreams shatter and burn.
"Yeah, me either." Octavia laughs also missing the moment Clarke swears she loses part of her sanity. Or what little remains of it. Her eye twitches in a way it never has before as she contemplates her very existence. "I'm a lot better than when we first landed but still nudity for them is so different to us."
And just like that the conversation moves on with Clarke internally screaming. Niylah is going to be so annoyed that she will have to endure another night of her ranting about the pure idiocy of the people they live with.
But she would like to understand how this does not resonate with anyone. It has to be a prank. It's the only logical explanation. The group is pranking the two of them and seeing which one of them will crack first. No one can possibly be this obvious.
Later on, when everyone has headed off to their tents again to rest does Clarke rant as she said she would do. Clarke raves manically about the conversation to Niylah who can barely hold back her laughter. Bursting out when Clarke told her she said to Raven and Octavia that when they go to sleep Niylah is naked in her bed and they still failed to miss what was happening.
They also failed to miss the fact they are sharing a bed. Not sharing a tent but sharing a bed. Big difference.
The sound of Niylah's highly amused laugh was the only thing to stop Clarke from out her own hair in frustration. Frustration that turns into her own confusion as Niylah then relays a somewhat similar occurrence that happened when she spent that part of the day with Gaia and Echo.
A story that makes Clarke begin to question a lot of her past interactions.