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Chapter 10
What did I get myself into?
Tris' POV
I yawn loudly for what I could only imagine is the hundredth time in the past hour. I unlock the door to my apartment, somehow letting myself in and locking the door behind me. I feel as though I could sleepwalk at this point. I know Doctor Ortiz pointed out that exhaustion was part of the joys of pregnancy, I can only hope that it will eventually subside.
I collapse on the couch, ready to fall asleep right where I land with jeans and boots on and all. A knock on the door alerts me. I glance at the clock, it's only 8 o'clock? It feels like two in the morning. Damn pregnancy. I peel myself from the couch, walking or maybe waddling would be a better word for it, towards the door. I looked through the peephole, before realizing that it was indeed Friday night and Maggie was standing right outside my door.
Maggie and I met when I joined the ambassador team two years ago. Maggie was warm and welcoming. She had been a transfer from Erudite a few years back. Although she was more Dauntless than anything, her thirst for knowledge got her a spot in government. She didn't have any desire to be an ambassador, but just close enough to be of use.
It was Maggie that kept me sane during the hardest days of my life when Will died. While everyone was so quick to point the finger at me, failing to hear anything but what they knew. That I was the one to pull the trigger to end his life. Maggie, on the other hand, took a look at the facts.
Fact 1- I and the other Ambassadors were told that not only was my gun, but all the guns were filled with paint filled bullets.
Fast 2- The gun that I so happened to pick up was indeed the only one that had a real bullet. In a full round, there was one real live bullet.
Fact 3- that after an internal investigation was done, it was conducted that the incident that killed Will was nothing more than an accident. A tragic accident at that. Although I found it hard to believe.
But be as it may, everyone already made their mind up about what happened that day. Rumors spread like wildfire after that. Rumors that I had it out for Will. That the bullet may have been meant for Peter, but Will got in the way. Or my favorite, Will knew something about me that could take me down…. Therefore, I had no choice but to kill him.
Christina was all too quick to jump to the worst conclusion. Believing the rumors, it was obvious where she and so many of our friends stood.
"You just couldn't stand that I was happy. That Will and I were in love, and you were alone." She accused me. It was not only heartbreaking to hear her think such a thing, but it was worse when the others so easily went to her aid and shut me out.
Not Maggie though. She pushed for answers and more importantly stood up to the idiots that believed what they heard. I was grateful to her, to have a friend that knew me well enough to ignore the stupidity of others.
For a while, I just about gave up… Refusing to go anywhere other than work and small errands. I didn't want to face the judgements and the whispers. That's when Maggie started showing up on Friday nights. With some kind of entertainment and wine, we started our Friday night girls hang outs.
It took time, but eventually we began to adventure out of this apartment. It was when Maggie introduced me to "clubbing" and "going to the movies." For the first time since the tragedy of Will happened, I felt at home again.
Another round of knocking has me fiddling with the lock on the door, opening the door up for her and letting her in. My eyes fall on the random movie in her hand and the bottle of white wine.
"Girl, where have you been?" She began. "Last I heard you passed out…And ended up in a hospital in Erudite." She continued as she pushed through towards the kitchen. She places both the movie and wine on the counter as she dug into my cabinets for wine glasses. "You would not believe what happened to me today…" She says, she finally pauses as she pours one of the two glasses and passes it to me. My rejection is what pauses her, confused, I don't think she ever saw me refuse a glass of wine.
I've been drunk maybe once. I didn't like the feeling during or the aftermath. It was a lesson well learned and never to relive again. But that doesn't mean that I don't have my one glass of wine, once a week.
"You don't want a glass?" She asks, placing the bottle down before getting to the second glass. I shake my head no. Should I tell her? Are we telling people yet?
"Are you on some meds or something?" Maggie asks, wanting to know what is indeed going on with me.
"Not exactly." I answer, "Although I was given a bottle of prenatal vitamins."
"Prenatal vitamins? But that's for… That's for pregnant women?" Maggie says, still putting two and two together. I stand silently, waiting for that light bulb to go off in her head. "What? Am I missing something here… Who are you fucking?" She finally asks.
"No one," I answer, still in disbelief that I have gotten into this situation and still wound up pregnant.
"Tris. I know in Abnegation they don't usually go over certain things… But maybe we should talk about where babies come from." She begins, her face actually serious.
"Shut up." I burst out, trying to sound serious, but obviously failing as I burst out laughing.
"But…. I thought you never have had…." She says, gesturing towards the obvious issue. "So, if you are not sleeping with anyone...And your… Pregnant?" She stutters, trying to understand.
"I think you need to take a seat." I say, gesturing towards the couch. She nods, filling up the glass that was meant to be almost to the rim before walking around the counter towards the couch.
"Do you remember I had that checkup a few weeks ago?" I ask. She nods her head, confused at what that has to do with this.
"Oh my god, is Doc Ortiz the father?" She asks, jumping to the wrong conclusion.
"No," I say, disgusted by the idea. "But he is the reason why I'm pregnant." I continued, "it was a busy day, and they were short staffed… He got his patients mixed up and accidentally artificially inseminated me." I confess.
"What? What do you mean…. He accidentally inseminated you?" She asks, confused. "How the fuck did that happen?"
"I mean he took a man's sperm and injected it into me when he did my examination." I got into more detail.
"But?" She says.
"I know. I'm still trying to understand it myself."
"He should be fired, He should… He should… I hope you are reporting this Tris." She says, her face showing how violated she feels with the idea of this happening to me. "Do you know who the father is?" Maggie finally asks, as she has been silent for the past five minutes.
"Four," I blurt out.
"The instructor you were in love with…." She says, her mouth gaped open even wider than before.
"That's the one." I say, nodding my head.
"Isn't he married to…."
"Christina." I say.
"And wasn't she your best friend…. The one that was with…" She says, unable to finish the statement.
"Yup," I say, wishing now more than ever I could drink.
"Fuck." She says, "And you're still a virgin?"
"Yup." I answer.
"Fuck." She says. "What are you going to do?" She finally asks.
"I'm going to keep it." I answer calmly.
"Are you sure that's for the best?" She continues, " I mean… We are talking about a baby here. A baby with Four… And Christina. I mean that's gotta be messy as shit." She points out.
"I know. But I want it, Maggie. I want this baby. I know it won't be easy."
"It won't be. Christina will make sure of it." She points out. "I swear…That bitch is crazy." She jokes. I can't agree with her more.
"Yeah. I have that feeling too." I say in agreement.
"Well, if this is what you want… You know I got your back." She says, supporting me. I'm thankful once again to have her as my friend and on my side.
I wake up to the sound of knocking on the door. I just about swear under my breath as I peel myself from my bed. Last night, Maggie didn't leave until 2 am. We lost track of time talking about baby showers, nurseries and childcare. All the things I thought I would have a partner to talk over with. All things I thought I wouldn't be doing for years to come.
I wobble towards the door, the knocking getting more and more persistent. What the fuck? I unlock the door, swinging it more dramatically than I have to, to see who in the world is on the other side of the door. There she is, Christina with her hands full of bags and a large wide smile. And just like that a wave of nausea hits me harder than ever. I turn from her, cupping my mouth and running for the bathroom.
My knees crash against the cold tile floor just in time as I heave my empty stomach into the toilet. I dread every small noise that I hear in my apartment. Knowing damn well who it most likely is now that I opened the door.
What a way to wake up?
I hear the door close, lock, and footsteps slowly coming closer towards me. I close my eyes, wishing for the nausea, for the woman in my apartment, for the ache in my knees to go away.
"Oh morning sickness… The joys of pregnancy." Christina says, her voice a little too chipper to think that it's anything close to empathy. "Crackers and a little bit of ginger ale will help with that." She suggests. I hear her walk away and place her bags on my glass table.
"Bitch is crazy," Maggie's words from last night come to mind. Bringing a small smile on my face. I flush the toilet and stand carefully from the floor. Brushing my teeth and washing my hands, I join Christina in the dining room.
"Glass table?" Christina asks, taking notice of what my dining room table is made of. "You'll have to get that replaced immediately." She says.
"Bitch is crazy." The words repeat once more in my head. I swear it makes me feel slightly better.
"What is all this?" I ask, gesturing towards the bags on the table and ignoring her comment all together. I will decide what needs to be replaced or not in my home.
"These are just a few things to make your life a little easier… And better for the baby." She says. She begins to dig out item after item.
Decaffeinated teas, crackers, ginger ale, a cd player with headphones and a variety of instrumental CDs, pants, and on and on… I feel like my mind might actually explode as I see my table getting fuller and fuller with things. I tone out Christina as she describes item after item that she pulls out. The necessity behind each one, the benefits of this or that and etc.
At first, I felt grateful for the thoughtfulness and the help. But as my table gets fuller and fuller, gratitude turns quickly to anger.
"And I have been thinking…That we really should discuss what the baby will be calling us." She says, as she takes a few things towards my kitchen. "I'm thinking Momma for me and Mommy for you." She says, like it's no big deal. My blood begins to boil thinking of my baby calling her anything but her name. "Also, I think I should have a key to your apartment for emergencies and late-night feedings." What? That is not happening, you crazy Bitch!
"We should really tell your boss about the pregnancy, jumping on and off trains isn't good at all for the baby." She continues, overstepping in every inch of my life. I find myself on the verge of picking up a cast iron skillet and hitting her over the head with it.
"Um, speaking of work… Christina, I think you should go. I really need to start getting ready and head out to work," I say, handing over her purse and phone. "Thanks for coming," I say, trying to give her a hint to leave.
"Oh, but Tris we really have so much to do… And talk about." She says, trying to avoid leaving.
"And we will…. Just not right now." I say, opening the door for her. Thankfully she nods, saying her goodbyes and walks out the door. I close the door behind her, locking it and making sure it's more than secure behind her. I let out a sigh, the moment I felt the relief of silence and claiming my apartment back I got the urge to pee and badly. I push off the door and walk back towards the bathroom. There I drop my bottoms and sit down, relieving my bladder, I feel better immediately. I look down as I wipe, terror taking me over as I see the red liquid on the white toilet paper.
My baby. What have I done?
AN
Questions, comments, concerns… Do you think Tris will lose the baby?
What are your thoughts on her best friend Maggie?
What do you think about Christina's behavior? Do you think she is overstepping?
Revised by: FDFobessed
Like always, happy reading, be safe and stay healthy
Trini