Author's note:
The Yeerk infesting the main character is the same Tarash five-one-four from some of my other works. This story takes place before she infests the Emily in these works. It isn't necessary to read them in order to understand this, but if you feel inclined to read "Nightmares and Friendship," you'll find her to be much the same character.
Oh, and this story takes place before she becomes the head of the Pennsylvania division of the invasion, so she's a sub-Visser in this story.
If you don't fight, your next Yeerk won't hurt you* my soon to be former Yeerk, Nillet six-five-six, told me. After a brief pause, he added, *Probably.*
I didn't answer. Not in words, anyway. I had been an involuntary Controller for just under a year, and all this time, to the same Yeerk.
Nillet was what I assumed was a typical Yeerk to an involuntary host. He saw me as a body for his use, and the fact that my mind remained alive was just an inconvenience for him. Or, at least, the fact that it was still present and VERY much did not want him there.
Call me selfish, but I wanted to keep control over my own body, and not have an alien slug invade my privacy. Even if I took him at his word that he couldn't just not hear my thoughts, he could choose not to open my memories. And he did so, regularly.
At least, he tried to avoid ones that were painful or embarrassing. I knew this was better than how most Yeerks treated an involuntary host, from what I'd heard in the cages.
Yes, cages. I got my body back for about three hours every two and a half days, but like other involuntary hosts, I would have run and not stopped until reaching the next state (and before my infestation, I never ran, joking that the wicked run when no one is chasing them--look it up in a Bible!). So, as soon as the slug leaves our ears, the Hork-Bajir guards escort the willing slaves to a cushy room, and throw us normal people into a cage. There's room enough for ten adults, but sometimes it's more, if there are kids.
We need hosts, Becca* Nillet told me. *And you'll be happier if you don't resist your next Yeerk. Not all of them are as kind as me.*
Kind?* I shot back. *Oh, excuse me. I didn't realize I should be so grateful.*
He sighed. *Compared to many, I am. You've heard enough stories about those who resist.*
This was true. I also knew that my soon to be former Yeerk had had mostly voluntary hosts before me--a Gedd, a Taxxon, a Hork-Bajir (the sole involuntary before me), and a human. His new assistant was sort of a promotion, or that's how he saw it, because it was a slightly older voluntary host. Oh, and this person had already had two Yeerks, so they obviously knew what they were getting into.
I didn't blame voluntary hosts. Not many people in the cages did. I mean, if they're going to infest you regardless, why not cooperate if you can negotiate to protect your family or a friend or spouse? Rumor has it, that's what the vice principal over at Roosevelt Junior High did. And they say his daughter is still free, even though both of her parents are infested. And, honestly, it doesn't matter. Unless the Andalites win, we're all going to be infested, and then no one will remember who signed up and who was kicking and screaming.
Anyway, there wasn't much more time to talk. Nillet was moving my body towards one of the rooms around the Yeerk Pool, although not the pool itself. I wouldn't have a few hours in a cage after he left my head. They'd just hold me down and stick a new Yeerk in. Then, he'd be transported to the pool, feed, and infest his new host and forget all about his horrible year with me, the awful involuntary.
Well, fine. I wasn't crying about losing him.
Even if I did feel sort of uneasy about who my new one would be.
Like I said. You'll be happier if you don't resist* he told me, his tone strangely gentle.
Screw you* I shot back.
Then, my head was hovering over the container, and Nillet was starting to disengage. I felt panicky, all of the sudden, and very, very guilty.
Not just for almost swearing.
Nillet* I began.
It's all right, Becca* he reassured me. After a pause, he added, *Take care.*
Control returned to me, and I felt a lump in my throat. But before I could think of doing anything, one of the human Controllers held my head down with way more force than was necessary. My neck slammed against the glass container, already starting to hurt. But that would be my new Yeerk's problem before long.
Speaking of which, I felt the new slug's slimy body on my ear. Even after almost a year, even knowing that the Yeerks always numbed my ear canal, I flinched in anticipation. There was always the small amount of pain between the moment it started to climb inside and when the painkiller set in.
Then, the usual feeling of losing control, little by little. As if losing control this way wasn't bad enough, it was always totally random. I didn't think they did it on purpose, though. Probably, if the Yeerks had their way, it would happen all at once.
I remained still, partly because at 5'4 and roughly 120 pounds, I didn't stand a chance against three other human Controllers with Dracon beams. But also because a part of me just wanted to get this over with. I wanted to bite the bullet, so to speak, and find out what kind of slug I'd be dealing with until they moved on from a college student.
It didn't take long to lose control completely, to be metaphorically shoved into a corner of my mind. I could feel some emotions from my new Yeerk, though, and they were neither the elation of a Yeerk getting a human for the first time, nor the arrogance and spite of a Yeerk determined to crush a host who dared not to be voluntary.
I tried to be brave, but even though I couldn't really feel my stomach, it felt like it hurt. You know the feeling you get before a really hard test, or when you were caught doing something wrong and just waiting to be punished? Or face to face with a bully? Well, all of that was how I felt.
I won't hurt you.*
The voice sounded like a female one, not that I had much experience, and was more gentle than Nillet's usually was. Had been.
She moved my hand in some sort of sign, and immediately, the hands gripping my head released me.
The Yeerk straightened in a slow, almost peremptory manner, and I had the mental image of wearing a crown. Or my Yeerk, anyway. To my surprise, she giggled.
Not quite* she said, just as gentle. *I am a sub-Visser, but not a queen. Although, we do have an emperor...*
Out loud, she said, in a haughty manner I never used, "There is a difference, Melcor eight-six-five, between securing the head and doing damage to it. I shall be in pain for at least a day, thanks to your actions."
A taller female, with skin so pale as to be nearly translucent, and short red hair, gave a slight inclination of her head as she backed away a few steps.
"I apologize, sub-Visser," she murmured.
My new Yeerk rolled my eyes. "Just don't do it again. I won't have my host body damaged, even if she is involuntary for now."
For now?* I asked.
Or thought. When you're a host, there's no real difference between the two.
She didn't answer, not in words, but I could feel her uncertainty.
After she dismissed the other Controllers, she left the room, and then addressed me.
My name is Tarash five-one-four, Rebecca.* After a slight pause, she added, *I hope that we can become friends.*
A/N: If you've read my other fics, you can probably guess how this one will turn out. At least a little. All the same, I hope you stick along for the ride.
Oh, and please leave feedback. Please?