A Sophia (Totally-Not-The-Paledrake) Interlude

It took a while, but as the party progressed, Sophia eventually came to the slow, horrifying realization that she had to be the responsible, adult one.

She didn't want to be the responsible adult one! She wanted to make money while just sitting around and reading Devilish Count novels until her brains leaked out of her ears, and maybe read the occasional dirty book by the Marchioness Sade while thinking about Katarina and her brother making beautiful children together. Like, stupidly beautiful children, any kids they made would set a new twinkling titanite standard of stupidly beautiful. And sometimes she'd think about being there as well, giving needed directorial assistance and telling those two useless know nothings how to do it properly, until she finally got exasperated and had to show them how it was done…

Sophia took a moment to dab at the blood leaking from her nose with a handkerchief.

Yes, that's what she would have wanted to do! But, alas, she had to adult, since her business partner clearly didn't want to.

Sophia could understand it coming from Mary. After all, her before- and after-Academy life wasn't all that different save for her developing a strange belief that commoners were insanely dangerous in general and Maria was extremely dangerous specifically, but to be fair, that latter view was accurate. She was still the dark and terrible Child of Manus behind the Marquis of House Hunt, and when her eldest sister rose to the rank of Marchioness, Mary would probably still be the Child of Manus behind her. She was the socialite of their generation. There wasn't much 'adulting' needed there, except for slowly adapting to her aging peers.

But Maria?

It was ironic. Maria had been declaring her non-interest and lack of romantic, let's not kid ourselves here, obsession with Katarina for as long as they had known her, and everyone had finally more-or-less accented her neutrality in Katarina matters. So why was it that she picked now to develop a weird fixation on Katarina? Or, as she kept putting it, her squire, open-parenthesis-exclamation-point-dash-exclamation-point-dash-exclamation-point-dash-exclamation-point-dash-close-parenthesis?

Was she the only one who realized the danger, of how easily 'proud of student' became 'hot for student'?

So, Sophia, to her regret, had to adult, to keep this suddenly-risky-potential-new-rival away lest she finally realize how great Lady Katarina was!

"Okay, Maria, that's enough," Sophia said, pulling her aside. Lady Selena and the Catley girl had wandered off, talking about the many shortcomings of Larna Smith, while Lalatina had taken Matthew aside to introduce her to a fellow member of the Rocks of Havel Covenant. Katarina was still talking to old people under Mary's watchful eye, and was meeting a surprising number of writers and playwrights. "This isn't all just following Lady Katarina around and grading her etiquette. You need to socialize too. Remember, this is about you making your social debut and establishing yourself."

Maria frowned. "Is this really necessary?" she said.

"I don't know, is it necessary to keep Lady Katarina away from all distractions and make sure she has perfect etiquette even though she's been doing just fine for years?" Sophia said blandly. "Look, young nobles socialize for petty distractions, gossip and judging each other. Adult nobles socialize for petty feuds, posturing, sabotaging, and more of the childish stuff but with national repercussions. Not socializing doesn't mean you're not playing, it means you have no allies besides us. And while it would be extremely interesting to see what you'd do to someone trying to destroy you, I don't think you'd want your subjects to have to go through the economic repercussions of that."

For a moment, Maria looked stubborn… then she sighed. "I suppose," she said, voice resigned. "Very well then. Do you have an suggestion as to where we begin?"

"Well, it's already clear to anyone watching that you have some sort of 'in' with our hostess and her official best friend," Sophia narrated in case Maria hadn't noticed. "And since I've been using wind magic to protect us from eavesdroppers and you haven't let your drink stay still, no one's been able to listen in on us to get much of a sense of your personality. At best, they might try lip reading, but that's not very reliable. So you're pretty much a blank slate. But as for where to start… so those ladies in the tights over my left shoulder?"

If Sophia hadn't been watching for it, she'd never have noticed Maria glance that way. "The group of four who seem unable to realize the purpose of coats is to act as a means of keeping your body heat in the cold, not be a means to frame one's blood vials?"

"Yes, those," Sophia said. Blood vials? Really? "Go over there and talk to them. Without breaking their arms if they try to make comments about you previously being a commoner, please." Not that they were likely to. People who casually fashion souls as someone else tended to be admiring—or terrified shitless—of the person they were dressing as, and while they'd done truly atrocious recolors and recuts, the sets they were wearing were still clearly attempts at reproducing the suit Maria had worn to her knighting. Which was in fact the very suit she was wearing now, come to think of it.

Maria didn't move. "What do we talk about?" she said.

Sophia stared. Maria's face was completely impassive, bland, and still as a porcelain doll.

"Anything?" Sophia said. "I mean, what do you usually talk about with Lalatina or Matthew?"

"Knight matters, or training curriculum for Katarina," Maria said promptly.

Sophia nodded. She was getting a singling feeling, like she was entering a very big room with a single person inside it, and the doorway behind her had no door. "Okay then… what did you talk about when you first met Dame Matthew?"

"We talked about training and had a spar," Maria said. "It went on for a long time."

Sophia nodded again. "Maria, we're friends, right?"

"I like to think so," Maria said.

Sophia gave her a bland look. "Maria. We're friends."

"Yes…?"

"That was a statement. I'm explicitly telling you we're friends. So you never have to 'think' so again. Unless you don't want to be my friend for some reason?"

"No," Maria said, a bit too hastily. She shook her head. "No, Sophia, I want to be your friend."

"Then say it," Sophia said. "Say we're friends."

"We're friends."

"Mean it, Maria!" Sophia said. "We're friends!"

"We're friends," Maria said, with greater conviction.

Sophia nodded again. "Okay, as your friend, I have to ask… do you not know how to start a conversation with people?"

For a moment, Maria was silent. "In the town where I was born, after my Light Magic became public knowledge, I was ostracized by children for being a noble bastard," she said quietly. "At the academy, I was ostracized for being a commoner. It was only in the Student Council that I began to meet people seemed not to care about either, and even then, most conversation tended to be about work or…" She shrugged. "I don't have a lot of experience beginning conversations with those who aren't coworkers."

Sophia wondered how Maria had managed the minor miracle of not having fallen in love with Lady Katarina. A lonely childhood, distanced from or by others for factors outside of their control, no one to turn to? Sophia knew that character description. She knew several versions of it, in fact. They all usually ended with "and then they met Katarina Claes, and her kindness, friendliness, and energy drew them to her, until they fell in love".

Maria Campbell had not only gone through that, she'd gone through it for longer. HOW was she not the most Katarina-crazy of them all?

Not that Sophia wasn't glad she wasn't, but it challenged her very understanding of a sane universe!

Sophia found herself putting one arm around Maria in a totally-just-friends gesture. "Well, I'm glad we found something else besides work to eventually talk about," she said, then paused. "Wait, no we didn't! We STILL talk about work!"

"Yes, it's very comforting in its regularity," Maria said. "Technically, this entire conversation has been about the work-related need for me to socialize."

"Oh dead gods, it has, hasn't it?" Sophia sighed. "Ugh… all right, examine the question of whether I've really grown up or just gotten older later. You need to socialize. Follow my lead."

Argh, how did Lady Katarina do this?-! How was she just supposed to introduce Maria to a group of total strangers?

Unbidden, something came to her mind, a scene from a book she'd once read, 'How I Met Your Mothers'…

That would work.

The group of young ladies—none of them recognizable from the Academy—were all talking about the weather, trying to make it look like they hadn't been glancing at Maria as Sophia and Maria walked as if they had seen someone they knew and were just about to pass by. The group grew tense as Sophia and Maria drew even with them, then relaxed as first Sophia, then Maria passed by. Only then did they relax.

Sophia immediately turned around to face them with a grin. "Hi," she declared in her best Katarina impersonation, which wasn't much.

The group of ladies seemed to jump in surprise. One nearly stumbled on the heels she was wearing.

Grinning, Sophia gestured like she was presenting something. "Haaave you met Lady Maria?"

To Maria's credit, and unlike Sophia herself if one of her friends had just pushed her to meet a group of girls, the knight didn't just smile awkwardly, raise a book as an ineffectual barrier, and mumble something softly. Maria made a smooth knightly bow, looking impressive and dashing instead of awkward and runny. Only someone who didn't know her would have noticed she was stiff and nervous. The stiffness was mostly in her neck, shoulders, and other non-moving parts. Sophia supposed it was conditioning or something, not letting nervousness affect her mobility.

"Good day you to, ladies," Maria said in a confident yet distant voice that, Sophia was surprised to realize, sounded very similar in tone to Nicol's voice when he was greeting new people. The voice that had people hot, bothered, aroused and fainting. "I hope you have been enjoying the party so far?"

So, not completely lacking in things to say, Sophia observed. Just nervous and not confident, in her own particular Maria idiom.

None of the four ladies were blushing, though they did look surprised.

"H-how do you do, Lady Maria?" one of them said, wearing an imitation suit in cream fabric with yellow accents. There was only the slightest hitch in her voice. "Lady Maria Campbell, I believe?"

Maria nodded, one hand behind her, another on her chest, on her cravat. Sophia leaned back slightly, glanced. Yep, shoulders till stiff, and the hand behind her was clenched in a fist with index finger slack, as if she wanted to hold a gu—gehrman. "Indeed, your ladyship. I am Lady Maria Campbell, knight, and this is my friend and business partner, Lady Sophia Ascart. I am surprised you've heard of me."

Said the woman who'd been causing absurd stories about her since the end of first year.

"Who hasn't heard of the Wandering Knight?" the one wearing cream said. "I am Lady Vivenna, daughter of Viscount Idris. May I introduce my friends; the Lady Amanda, daughter of Baron Marcone: the Lady Anastasia, daughter of Baroness Cisarovna; and the Lady Lara, daughter of Marquis Wraithcroft."

"Non-inheriting, I assure you," Lady Lara said quickly. "The title is going to my brother Tomoss, so I'm not going to become a Marchioness in future." Her friends patted her reassuringly.

Sophia blinked, her worldview's flame fading slightly as she had to adjust for the fact it contained some who was glad they weren't going to become a Marchioness. Even Mary was merely apathetic to not getting to inherit the title, not actually glad. Most people up for the title fought tooth, nail, dagger, sword, gossip and rumor to become a Marchioness. Crazy bitches.

Maria, however, went very still. Then she nodded to Lady Lara. "So noted, Lady Lara. Though I am sure you would have bought true honor and nobility to the title."

Aaaaand there was the first blush. "You flatter me, Lady Campbell," Lady Lara said. "Besides, bringing true honor and nobility to being a Marchioness is a short jump to cross."

"Yeah, most are pretty nasty," Lady Amanda said, nodding. "Father deals with them all the time, and he always comes back looking like he's just managed to avoid getting involved in a plot to usurp the throne."

"Wouldn't be surprised," Sophia said, and there were knowing—and in Lady Lara's case, resigned—nods.

"If I may inquire, Lady Campbell," Lady Anastacia said, "where did you have your clothing set made? It looks so… different!"

Maria glanced down at herself. "There is an accomplished tailor in my lands," she said, "in the town of Raven's Nest. He does very fine work."

"A tailor? Not a seamstress?"

Maria shook her head. "No, seamstresses seldom have experience in making trousers."

They all looked at her trousers, which managed to perfectly emphasize the shape of her legs while granting her freedom of movement. Then they looked down at their own, which looked like it had been painted on. Sophia wondered how much they were sweating under there. At least a skirt had pockets of air.

"A tailor, you say?" Lady Vivenna said. "And he did your trousers?"

"Yes, Master Hebert," Maria said. "A very excellent tailor. I go to him for all my clothing needs that don't need armor or leather."

"Could you perhaps arrange an introduction for us…?"

Sophia softly faded back as the five began discussing clothing—Maria Campbell! Talking about fashion!—gently letting her spell to protect them from eavesdropping go and noting there were at least six spells ready to take advantage of her absence. Quashing the urge to whistle, she went looking for Lady Katarina…

Maria Formal Suit Set
Among the first-years, all students of the Academy, was the commoner Light Magic wielder Maria.

This was her formal suit, crafted originally in Estus and modified by Maria, plain garb without decorative embroidery or hardened leather protective layers.

Maria suspects she is related to Katarina Claes, and has grown greatly fond of the younger woman, unaware of Katarina's curious mania with her own dreadful fate.

Wanderer's Elevation Set
Trousers, shirt and coat worn in imitation of the Wandering Knight on the occasion of her elevation to knighthood.

It is weak garb, with too much decoration and embroidery. A hunter would not normally employ garbed in this, ineffectual against the strength of the beasts as it is, but it's better than nothing.

Fine clothes are nice, but not if they engender passivity.