And we're back! Hope everyone enjoys the chapter.
Chapter title taken from the song of the same name by Swallow The Sun.
KEEPING SECRETS CHAPTER 35: INNOCENCE WAS LONG FORGOTTEN
Lucy awoke with a jolt, her body tensing as if bracing for an attack. Her breath came fast, her heart pounding fiercely in her chest. It took a moment for her eyes to adjust to the dim light of the lacrima overhead.
For a brief, hopeful second, she clung to the idea that the events of the day had been a nightmare- that Natsu being Zeref's brother, the prince of Alvarez, and the guild's enemy, had all been some horrible trick of the mind.
But the steady hum of the airship beneath her shattered that illusion.
She was still aboard the Alvarez command ship. Still a hostage, more or less. And Natsu... had helped Zeref invade their home, fought against Fairy Tail, and taken the First Master's body right out from under them.
The weight of those revelations crushed her all over again, pressing against her chest like an unbearable force. She curled into herself, wrapping her arms around her knees. She thought she had cried herself dry, but fresh tears welled in her eyes and spilled down her cheeks once more.
Everything about this was wrong.
The Natsu she knew- who'd laughed with her, teased her, protected her- would never have sided with Zeref or Alvarez over Fairy Tail. Would never have abandoned them. Abandoned her.
Yet here they were, lines drawn in the sand, with her and Natsu standing on opposing sides.
However, despite her continued turmoil, a creeping doubt was beginning to take root in her thoughts.
What if it was my family?
What if it was my mother?
Layla Heartfilia. The loving mother that she had never stopped missing. The woman who had shaped her into who she was today. And who, as it turned out, had once been an associate of Zeref.
Our families have known each other a long time.
Smartass. She bitterly thought as Zeref's words echoed in her mind.
But the greater implications sent a shiver down her spine.
If her mother had somehow been brought back...if Lucy had the chance to stand by her side again, to fight for her, protect her... Wouldn't she do it? Wouldn't she face Hell itself, and anyone else who would try and get in her way, for that chance? Despite it being over a decade since her mother had passed away, Lucy's love for her burned just as fiercely.
So with that feeling in mind, could she really blame Natsu for feeling that way about Zeref, despite his past?
Because from what little she had learned, before the curse, before the tragedy that destroyed their home, the two had been a happy family with their parents.
Lucy sighed. It made sense. Natsu wasn't looking at Zeref as the infamous black wizard of legend, or emperor of Alvarez- he was looking at him as his older brother. The one he had idolized, played with, fought with, cried with...
So could she say, with absolute certainty, that she wouldn't have made a similar choice, if she had been in his position?
The uncertainty made her chest ache. Guilt twisted in her stomach.
I was way too harsh.
She had let her initial emotions take over before she could even process everything. And now, the accusations she has thrown at Natsu- the question she had asked him about Igneel particularly- sat bitterly on her tongue now.
But that didn't change the fact that Natsu had kept them all in the dark. That he had chosen this path without telling them. That he had still fought against them.
It still hurts, so much.
Lucy didn't know how she sat there, crying silently into her knees. Eventually, her discomfort dulled her grief, and she forced herself to move. As she stood, her gaze flickered to a small, wall mounted mirror mounted on the wall, and she winced.
Dirt and grime clung to her skin from the battlefield. At some point, she had apparently lost the ribbon holding her hair, which now stuck out in all directions. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying.
She looked as much of a mess as she felt.
Lucy sighed. She needed to clean herself up, if only to feel slightly better. Remembering Natsu's earlier offer of sharing his private bathroom, she turned and opened the door to the hallway.
It was empty, thankfully no soldiers or crew in sight.
She slowly walked down the hall, scanning the doors for room 207. All the while her mind raced, trying to figure out what to say to Natsu when she saw him again.
She hadn't made any progress on that front by the time she reached the door marked 207. She raised a hand to knock.
Oh yeah, sorry I said all those awful things to you earlier, but I'd really like to use your bathroom now...
She grimaced. That didn't sound right. She lowered her hand.
After a moment, she thought, 'I'm sorry for what I said, Natsu. I didn't consider...' Her hand hovered over the door.
Wait, he's not innocent in this either! He yelled at me! And made me cry, and didn't even seem sorry about it! And he still fought against us and handed the First Master over to Zeref! she fumed, lowering her hand again.
But the look on his face... Now that I think about it, he probably was overwhelmed and didn't know what to do...
She raised her hand again-
But he never apologized for Jackal kidnapping me! Her hand started to drop once more-
A loud, exaggerated sigh broke the silence, and a dry, monotone voice quipped, "You gonna keep this up all day or are you just expecting the prince to read your mind and open the door?"
Lucy spun around, startled. Behind her, she found Brandish leaning against the wall, arms crossed, sly smile playing at her lips.
Despite the storm raging within her, Lucy let out a shocked gasp, stumbling back as she stammered, "Wh-wha- don't sneak up on people like that!"
Brandish's smile morphed into a smirk. "Wasn't trying to. You were just so lost in your own head you didn't notice me." She pushed herself off the wall. "So, I heard your reunion with the prince didn't go so hot."
Realization clicked in Lucy's mind and hurt flashed in her eyes as she looked at Brandish. "You knew."
Brandish didn't so much as blink. "Uh, yeah. Natsu's the prince. He's kinda a big deal throughout the empire. And, though I sometimes forget, he technically is my superior."
Lucy bristled at that. The idea of Natsu being anyone's 'superior' just didn't sound right. "You enjoy keeping me in the dark about that?"
Brandish shrugged. "Not particularly. But it doesn't matter how I feel. Orders are orders. If Invel, Grandpa August, His Majesty, or His Highness give me a command, I follow it. And I was explicitly ordered not to disclose Natsu's identity as the prince to anyone from Ishgar."
Lucy frowned. "Why?"
Brandish sighed. "Because, even after all this, Natsu wanted peace between Alvarez and Ishgar- Fiore especially. Plus, Fairy Tail knowing who the prince was would have been such a hassle. You'd all probably have tried to storm the palace to 'rescue' him. Case in point, I heard you hysterically claimed he was under some sort of brainwashing from His Majesty while you were up on the bridge."
Lucy scoffed, crossing her arms. "Well if he wanted peace, he royally screwed that up."
Brandish's eyes narrowed. "Except he didn't. It was His Majesty that blew it with your guild master, not Natsu. Or more accurately, His Majesty's curse did." She shook her head. "Natsu and His Majesty were in the Western Territories for months, handling some revolt. From what I understand, His Majesty left Natsu behind at one of their camps as some kind of prank, which is why he wasn't in the capital when His Majesty confronted Makarov."
Lucy didn't know what the strangest part of Brandish's words were. The idea of the legendary black wizard Zeref pulling a prank on someone, or the image of Natsu commanding legions of Alvarez soldiers alongside Zeref.
"Things weren't supposed to turn out this way," Brandish continued, "and then Jackal, the Empire's biggest idiot, had to go and make things even worse by dropping you in the middle of it all. But oh well. This is the situation we're in now, so we have no choice but to deal with it." She let out another sigh. "So anyway, why are you here?"
Lucy hesitated, feeling her face heat up. Why am I embarrassed? "I was going to ask to use his bathroom." She muttered.
Brandish stared at her blankly for a moment before snorting. "That's a terrible excuse."
"It's not an excuse, it's the truth!" Lucy fumed. Then, quickly, she shot back, "Why are you here?"
Brandish casually inspected her nails. "Natsu's had a rough day. Thought I'd offer to comfort him."
Lucy's face turned beet red. "W-wh-what?! Comfort ?!" She actively tried not to think too hard about what Brandish meant by that...
Brandish smirked. "Oh? You got a problem with that?" Her voice was amused, mischievous.
Lucy huffed and turned away with her arms crossed. "Of course not. I don't care what you do. I have no interest in the prince of Alvarez or Zeref's brother."
Brandish's smirk widened even more. "Well that's great news. Means he's all mine for the taking."
Lucy's stance faltered, her mind short circuiting. "Wait...wh- you mean all those passive aggressive comments about 'him' back at the Magic Council Headquarters were about Natsu ?!"
Lucy was getting annoyed with how amused Brandish looked. "Oh? So you're jealous after all?"
Desperately trying to ignore the unwanted pang of envy in her chest, she sputtered, "N-n-no!"
Brandish laughed. "My God, you're a terrible liar."
Lucy opened her mouth to argue more, but then quickly shut it, instead letting a smug expression form on her face. "You know what? Go ahead. Knock yourself out, go 'comfort' him. If you actually knew Natsu, you'd know he doesn't even remotely get romantic stuff."
To her horror, Brandish's amusement only grew. "Mhm. Well, he sure seemed to 'get' what I meant just fine when I kissed him."
Lucy really needed to stop thinking these revelations couldn't get any crazier. "Ashkfiajfuhudnvu- WHAT?!" she screeched, face heating up more than she thought was humanly possible.
Brandish laughed before shrugging. "It's such a shame though. From the way he talks, it's pretty obvious Natsu's head over heels for you."
Lucy froze. "Huh?" Just what is he saying about me?
"Oh yeah. Even talked about how if he could trust anyone in the guild about what he'd been up to this past year, it'd be you. Because you're kind. Compassionate. You understand people." Brandish's gaze sharpened. "Well, so much for that. From what I heard, you looked at him like he was the devil himself up on the bridge. And I can only guess what you had to say to him after you left. From the looks of things, you probably ripped his heart out and stomped all over it. Good job."
Lucy flinched. She bit her lip as fresh tears built up. "What was I supposed to do? What was I supposed to say?" Her voice cracked, rising in volume. "We thought he was Zeref's prisoner, not his... co-conspirator! Not his brother! Finding out the truth... it shattered my world! It's like I don't even know him anymore!"
Something was pushed into her field of vision. To her surprise, it was Brandish's hand, holding out a tissue for her. Lucy blinked in surprise.
Brandish's expression was unenthused as ever, but her eyes also had a rare softness to them now. "You know, I'm probably the last person who should be giving advice about personal communication after I've hated you half my life over an assumption... but, since you guys love going on about your bonds with each other so much, why don't you actually talk to him? And I mean talk - not accuse him, not cry about betrayal. Listen to him. Throw out all your preconceived bull about the empire and His Majesty, because like it or not, Natsu's one of us now, and that man is his brother. And it's pretty obvious how much he loves him. If you do that... well, I bet he'll be more willing about talking and listening to how all of this has made you feel, too. And then maybe both of you can move forward and work your lingering doubts with each other out."
Lucy clenched the tissue tightly, still sniffling. "I don't know if I can. His betrayal hurts too much." Her voice was barely above a whisper.
Brandish stared at her blankly for a moment before rolling her eyes. "Whatever. I tried. Suit yourself."
She pushed past Lucy, reaching for the door to Natsu's room.
Lucy found herself reaching out, grasping Brandish on the shoulder. "Wait..." Her voice was small, uncertain.
Brandish looked back over her shoulder at Lucy with narrowed eyes. "For what, Lucy? I'm not gonna wait forever for you to make up your mind. And honestly? Natsu won't either. Keep acting like this and I can see you convincing him to stay away from Fairy Tail forever."
Lucy's eyes widened. Through her hurt, she realized there was a part of her that still believed things with Natsu were not beyond repair.
Because the thought of him NEVER coming back to the guild, never hearing his laugh again, never seeing his big dorky smile again... almost completely broke her.
No. I refuse to let that happen.
Brandish's statement had been sobering, and she could think clearer now.
Swallowing hard, she nodded. "Alright, I'll talk to him. I'm going to try- no, I have to understand. To make this right."
Brandish turned to face her completely, giving her a small nod. "Good. That's more like it. But FYI? This is the only time I'm helping you with him. I feel like I owe you one after hating you for so long."
She turned to walk down the hall. "But make no mistake- I wasn't kidding back in Era. I'm not losing to you over him."
"Uh... got it." Lucy said, a bit bewildered. Great, a real love rival. Her face flushed again at the thought.
Brandish gave a satisfied nod, clearly enjoying Lucy's reaction. "Don't mess this up, or I will be back to comfort him properly." A smirk curled onto her lips. "Or one of the millions of women across the empire who voted him 'Alvarez's most eligible bachelor' will."
Lucy choked on her own spit. Alvarez's most eligible bachelor? NATSU?! She didn't even know why she was surprised at this point. This new world she had been dragged into was absolutely insane.
She didn't voice this, but she must have been making a face, because Brandish chuckled at her before giving a lazy wave and walking away.
As the nation destroyer walked down the hall, her smirk faded into something more thoughtful. Her mother's words from the memory she had viewed hours before echoed in her head. I think she and Lucy could be great friends.
Brandish sighed, stuffing her hands in the pockets of her coat. "Well, can't say I'm not trying mom. Might have just shot my love life in the foot to do it, though..." she muttered to herself.
She was much too far from Lucy for the Celestial mage to hear her. But even if she hadn't been, Lucy likely wouldn't have noticed, as her focus was completely on the door to Natsu's room.
Her heart pounded. The weight of the day's revelations, Brandish's words, and her own conflicted feelings settled on her shoulders. This wasn't about what Natsu had done or told them. It was about if she could face him after what she had said. If she could really understand and trust him.
Given the alternative, there is nothing else I can do.
It was time to talk to him- really talk to him.
She grasped the knob, turning it and swinging the door open.
Her eyes drifted across Natsu's room, taking in every detail. It was larger than the one she had been loaned, likely a privilege of his status.
His status.
That was still hard for her to wrap her head around. Natsu, a prince. As if discovering he was Zeref's brother wasn't insane enough.
The room was well lit by a large window on the back wall. A comfortable looking double bed sat in the room's center, facing the door. To its right, a sleek, state of the art terminal rested on a sturdy steel desk, a chair tucked neatly beneath it. Draped over the back of the chair was a black, high collared cape, the Alvarez crest embroidered in stark white.
Lucy's chest tightened as she stared at it. She had a hard time imagining Natsu- her Natsu- wearing something like that, representing Alvarez so openly.
My Natsu? That little unwanted thought dredged up more hurt in her chest. The man she had spoken to on board this airship barely felt like the friend she knew, the person she... cared for.
After all, today had done nothing but reinforce Natsu's loyalty to the Empire.
She swallowed the bitter taste in her mouth. She was here to try and understand and make amends, not stir up more resentment.
She exhaled and shook herself from her thoughts, only to realize-
The room felt empty.
As in, no Natsu.
A faint sound of running water reached her ears, drawing her gaze to a door to the right of the desk. The bathroom.
Her eyes widened. Oh my God, he's in the shower!
Heat crept up her face. Why didn't I knock?!
She had been so distracted by her conversation with Brandish that she'd completely forgotten.
Flashbacks of Natsu barging unannounced into her apartment back in Magnolia played through her mind. He's really rubbed off on me more than I thought.
Part of her told her to leave, but another part- the one afraid that if she left now, her conviction would waver and she wouldn't get another chance to come back- kept her feet rooted in place. Slowly, she closed the door behind her.
Her gaze wandered around the room searching for a distraction. Anything to steady her nerves. When her gaze passed over the nightstand to the left of Natsu's bed, she noticed two picture frames.
Curiosity won out. She stepped closer to inspect them.
The first picture made her breath catch.
It was her, Natsu, and Happy, sitting at a table in the guildhall, mid laugh. Pure, unfiltered joy was etched into their features. Based on their appearances and clothes, it looked like it was taken shortly after Lucy first joined Fairy Tail.
Memories surged to the forefront of her mind, drowning Lucy in nostalgia. She traced her fingers lightly over the glass, a smile slowly forming on her face. She had seen the picture before, back in Natsu's cabin. But something about seeing it here, onboard the Alvarez command ship, felt surreal.
And... oddly touching.
A pang of sorrow interrupted her happy reminiscing.
This feels like a lifetime ago .
Before she had lost Aquarius. Before the guild had split apart. Before any of them had known about Natsu's shocking family ties, about the fact he was a prince of the world's leading superpower.
Before they had found themselves on opposing sides of a war.
She held onto the picture for a long moment, as if setting it down would make it disappear forever, along with her happy memories.
But when she finally did set it down, and her eyes landed on the second photo...
Her mind blanked.
What... on Earthland am I looking at?
It was Natsu, and Zeref.
At a bar.
Both gripping microphones.
Natsu's mouth was wide open mid-verse, eyes closed, arm slung around Zeref, looking like he was giving the performance of a lifetime.
Zeref, in contrast, looked miserable . As if he had lost all dignity and wished he could sink into the floor and never resurface.
Lucy gawked at the image before an incredulous laugh escaped her lips. Am I really looking at Natsu and Zeref... singing Karaoke? What the Hell?
She was so absorbed in the ridiculousness of the photo that she didn't hear the water in the other room shut off.
The bathroom door opened.
Lucy scrambled to set the picture back, and whirled around-
Her breath caught.
Steam swirled around Natsu as he stepped out of the bathroom. His damp hair clung to his forehead, stripped of its usual wild spikes. She had only seen it like this a handful of times, and now with what she knew... she could clearly see his resemblance to Zeref.
Color aside... They really are brothers.
Her gaze drifted downward-
And her stomach twisted.
Also new to Natsu, was a jagged scar slashed across his chest, just next to his heart.
Her pulse pounded in her ears as more of August's words replayed in her mind.
During our retrieval of Fairy Heart... His Highness was impaled by Fairy Tail's ice demon slayer.
Natsu had almost lost his life today.
So Gray did it? He killed E.N.D?!
She had celebrated that.
A wave of nausea crashed over her, remembering her own thoughts.
The relief she had initially felt at 'E.N.D's' demise felt like poison in her veins now.
"Uh...you okay?"
Natsu's voice startled her from her spiraling thoughts. And that was when she realized-
She had been silently staring at him.
While he was stark naked.
She turned away so quickly she nearly gave herself whiplash. "I-I-I'm so sorry!" She managed, face burning hotter than a fire dragon's breath.
There was a pause before Natsu's voice came again, far too calm, but also laced with amusement.
"You're sitting on my towel."
Lucy wanted to die.
With a strangled squeak, she flung the towel out from under her towards where Natsu was standing. She kept her eyes firmly shut as she heard him dry himself off and slide a fresh change of clothes on.
"I'm good." His voice came, even and seemingly devoid of emotion.
She turned hesitantly, but Natsu wasn't looking at her. His gaze was distant, as if he was lost in thought. The easygoing energy she had always known- his warmth, his carefree grin- were nowhere to be found. Instead, his gaze was haunted by a heaviness that was almost palpable.
"Bathroom's all yours, if you need it." He muttered.
Lucy shook her head, standing. "That's not why I'm here."
Natsu cocked his head, finally meeting her gaze, a curious spark taking over his own.
She took a deep breath, steeling herself. "I wanted to apologize. For what I said, about you... and your brother. And when I found out what you'd been doing this past year."
Natsu's eyes widened.
"I was shocked, and honestly, I felt betrayed... but I didn't stop to consider how any of this made you feel." Lucy admitted. "And... I said a lot of hurtful things to you without even trying to understand. So... yeah. I am sorry, Natsu. And I wanted to see if we could talk some more."
Natsu exhaled slowly before flopping backwards onto his bed, arms sprawled out. "Thanks, Luce, but you don't need to apologize. I get why you were upset. It's not like my reaction to any of what you said was any better."
Lucy bit her lip, watching him carefully. She was definitely not used to seeing Natsu like... whatever this was. Even when he was serious, Natsu carried an undeniable energy. She had never seen him subdued before. But now... it looked like something had been drained out of him. His voice was far too quiet, his eyes far too empty.
It hurt to see him like this.
"I'm still sorry that I didn't even try to understand." She pressed. "I, uh... talked with Brandish out in the hall a little, and she helped me... consider some things I hadn't before."
At the mention of the Brandish, Natsu tensed slightly, a faint hint of red appearing on his face. "Brandish, huh..."
Lucy felt a tiny, irrational spark of jealousy flare up in her chest. She forced her voice to remain even as she said, "Look, if you'd rather talk with her, I understand-"
"No, it's not that," he cut in quickly, sitting up and running a hand through his hair. "I just..." His fingers tangled in his locks before dropping to his face, his palms pressing into his eyes. "Ugh! I just don't know what to say!"
His voice lowered as he slid his hands down, resting them against his knees. "I had to choose between the guild and my brother, Luce. I didn't want to... but I didn't have a choice."
Lucy swallowed hard, and nodded.
Natsu let out an exaggerated sigh, rubbing the back of his neck. "I really didn't know what to do for a while. But finally, someone pointed something out to me. Hard as it was... if I didn't go back to the guild, you all still had each other."
Lucy wanted to argue, to tell him there was no one, even in Fairy Tail, that could ever take his place. But she held her tongue, letting him finish.
"...but if I left Alvarez, Zeref would have no one."
The weight of his words settled heavily in between them.
Lucy almost pointed out Zeref had an entire empire backing him, but she stopped herself. That wasn't what Natsu meant.
"He wouldn't have a friend." She murmured. "A brother."
Natsu nodded. "Some of the Twelve... August, Irene, and Invel come to mind... it's obvious they care about him more than they have to. But at the end of the day, he's still their emperor. They have to do what he says. He sees them as his pawns or whatever. His curse doesn't really leave him in a position to make meaningful relationships... but, I guess I'm a special case, being his little brother and all."
He paused another moment. A small, almost self satisfied smirk tugged at his lips as he added, "Plus, I don't do what he says unless I want to."
Lucy couldn't help but smile a little at that. Now that did sound like the Natsu she knew.
There was so much she wanted to ask, but she started small. "So does that mean you voluntarily give him your scarf? I was pretty surprised, seeing him wearing it... even after finding out you two were brothers."
Natsu hummed as he reached for where his scarf usually was. His fingers instead found the locket resting against his chest."Mhm... yeah, I did let him 'borrow' it. Still feels weird. I think he wears that scarf more than I do now."
Before Lucy could point out how odd that was, he added, "But, you know, that's what Igneel and Anna made the scarf for. So Zeref and I could be a family again, as much as we could."
Lucy blinked in surprise. "Wait... Anna? As in-"
"Your ancestor? Yeah." He furrowed his brow. "Wait, how do you know?"
"Uh, long story, but Capricorn told me... wait a second, the five warriors they sent to the future... Was one of them you?"
Natsu nodded. "Yeah. You know the others too. Gajeel, Wendy, Sting, and Rogue."
Lucy's eyes widened as everything clicked into place. "The dragon slayers trained by actual dragons... that makes a lot of sense actually."
Natsu nodded. "Zeref and Anna helped too. You would have loved Anna, Luce, she was a lot like you actually..." He trailed off, his face heating up slightly as he remembered his declarations that he was gonna marry Anna when he grew up, despite her already having a husband... Yeah, he was definitely not sharing that part. "We were all supposed to come out of the gate together, but... something went wrong. I still really don't know what exactly happened, or where Anna ended up."
Lucy managed another small smile. "I see... so is that how you ended up with Igneel?"
"Kinda." Natsu said. "He was Zeref's friend, and after my... resurrection, Zeref couldn't take care of me. Probably won't surprise you to hear I wasn't a very well behaved kid, but more than that, my brother's curse just made him so unstable around me, it wasn't safe. He almost killed me right after he resurrected me... and Mard Geer, of all people, stepped in and saved me. Talk about ironic, huh?"
"I, uh, definitely didn't see that coming." Lucy said, remembering the cruel and terrifying demon who was the master of Tartaros.
Natsu let out a small chuckle. "Right? Anyway, eventually Zeref gave me to Igneel, who agreed to raise me." His fingers curled into his palms. "I still remember the day Igneel took me away. I fought and screamed bloody murder, begged for him to let me go back to Zeref... and Igneel just took it all, even went as far as to cry in front of me 'cuz he felt so bad about the whole thing."
His voice grew quieter, and heavier as he added, "And then... he promised me we'd break Zeref's curse, and kill Ankheseram together."
A bitter laugh escaped him. "Obviously, I've had some setbacks... and now he's gone. Mom and Dad are gone. And... God, as much as I love the guild, I couldn't abandon Zeref again, Lucy." His grip on his knees tightened. "I mean, not that it was my choice the first time, but still... I couldn't come back to Fairy Tail and preach about how I'd do anything for y'all while turning my back on my own brother. Y'know?"
He exhaled again, shaking his head.
"Besides... the way he is... I know he'd be all, 'I didn't do it for you, I did it for me' or some stupid shit like that if I asked him, but... when you think about it... it's my fault, that he's the way he is."
Lucy's breath caught.
She remembered his outburst in the hallway, the sheer distress on his face and in his voice when she had listed Zeref's crimes.
Lucy was starting to understand why Natsu felt so indebted to Zeref, but still, she had to say;
"Natsu..." she reached out, taking his hand in hers. "Those things aren't your fault."
To her surprise, he squeezed her hand like a lifeline- but he shook his head, sniffling softly.
"If I didn't exist, neither would 'the black wizard Zeref'."
Lucy felt her own eyes sting. It had been so easy to look at Zeref as some great, evil threat to the world- but as it turns out, the truth was not so black and white.
As if sensing her thoughts, Natsu continued, voice quiet yet heavy with emotion, "Zeref isn't evil, Luce. He's hurt. Tortured by that damn curse."
Slowly, Lucy nodded. "I... I believe you." She admitted. She might not be ready to trust Zeref yet, but she did trust Natsu. "I do. I just wish you would have told me. Told all of us- the guild, that is." She corrected. "Maybe... we could have found another way through this."
Natsu exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair. "I wanted to. I really did. But I was actually scared, Luce." His voice dipped, laced with bitterness. "Not that you all would hate me, or reject me either... but like I said, that you wouldn't want me to save Zeref. That you'd still want me to help kill him."
Lucy didn't know what to say. She wanted to say that wasn't true, that they could have figured something out. But her own words from earlier echoed in her mind, sharp and damning.
We could have found a way to save you and still destroy Zeref.
Her stomach clenched.
Natsu's gaze met hers, raw and sorrowful. "Luce... what if, after we had beaten Phantom Lord, everyone in the guild looked at you and said, 'Great job! Now let's go finish it and take out your old man!'"
Lucy recoiled as if she had been slapped.
What her father had done- hiring Phantom Lord to kidnap her, for the purpose of bringing her home so her father could marry her off to some depraved noble for some business deal, had been despicable. But despite the anger she had felt, despite the fact she hadn't forgiven him... she hadn't wished him dead. When they awoke from their seven year sleep on Tenrou Island, she had been devastated to learn he was gone.
She almost lashed out, ready to demand why Natsu would say something like that.
And then it washed down over her like a bucket of ice cold water.
She had just suggested the same thing to Natsu about his brother hours ago.
She had looked at her best friend and expected him to agree to watching his own brother die.
Tears blurred her vision, as a deep, gut wrenching shame overwhelmed her. All I've done is prove all of his fears right.
Without thinking, she reached over and wrapped him in a tight embrace. "God, I'm so sorry Natsu." She choked out.
This time, he didn't hesitate to return her embrace.
Lucy felt a new resolve building in her chest. Despite how things had played out, despite knowing he had deliberately kept secrets from them, and fought against them... Lucy wanted things to be different.
In fact, she'd see to it.
"Natsu..." she whispered.
He pulled back, looking at her intently.
She took a steadying breath. "I hate that things happened this way. I hate that you kept me, and the rest of the guild in the dark. I hate you had to fight against us-" His face fell a bit, but she pressed on. "-but I understand."
His eyes widened.
"I understand why you want to save your brother. I understand why you thought you had to do it the way you did, even if, I'm being honest, it still hurts me. I want to believe if you had come to me, come to us before the war, we would have helped you. I know I would have helped you. But given what I said back on the bridge and in the hallway... I really do understand now, Natsu. Why you were afraid "
"Luce..." he said, his tone heavy with emotion.
She continued. "And honestly, as much as everything about your brother still terrifies me, I'm realizing, maybe things aren't so black and white regarding him. So if you're saying Fairy Heart would be safer in Alvarez than with the Council... then I trust you."
For a moment, Natsu simply stared at her, as if he were letting her words sink in. Then, he exhaled heavily, his shoulders slumping in relief. "Luce... thank you." His voice was full of sincerity.
Lucy felt the weight in her chest begin to lift. They could move forward. They could-
"But that wasn't the only reason we took Fairy Heart."
Lucy froze. The weight crashed back down.
Her voice was wary. "What do you mean?"
Natsu looked away, shaking his head. "The other reason... I...we wanted Fairy Heart..." His hand clenched into fists. "I knew no one would understand."
Lucy's breath caught. "Natsu-"
Before she could press him more, he gazed back at her with a look she had never seen from Natsu before. His usual warmth was gone. His eyes were clouded, troubled, and deeper than she'd ever known them to be.
"Luce... no matter what you think you know about me and Zeref... I know he's all quiet and serious and stuff, and I'm well, not... but personalities aside, we're actually a lot alike."
Lucy frowned. She had already assumed they had more in common than she'd ever expected... but... Why does this feel so ominous?
Her lips parted, a question forming-
The airship suddenly jolted.
She sucked in a startled breath as they touched down on solid ground, her body tensing. Her fingers gripped the sheets beneath her.
She looked up at Natsu-
And her breath caught yet again.
The grim expression on his face was something else she'd never seen on him before.
"You should stay here, Luce." He said quietly.
He stood, walking over to his desk, before turning his head to look at her again. His voice was calm.
Too calm.
"I don't think you're gonna want to see what happens next."
A chill ran down her spine.
Her heart pounded against her ribs as she stared at him. What does he mean? What's he about to do?
And why did she have the sinking feeling that, no matter how much she wanted to understand and support him... she might not be ready for whatever was coming?
Part of her wanted to listen to him now. What he had just told her- that he and Zeref were alike- no doubt had to be connected to whatever was about to happen. What exactly did he mean by that? And why doesn't he want me to see whatever this is?
But the stronger, more determined part of her, refused to be left behind, refused to let Natsu shoulder everything alone anymore. She'd already come this far, learned the truth about his past, his brother, everything. If she truly wanted to understand him... then she couldn't turn back now.
She stood. "I'm coming with you." Her voice was firm, unwavering.
Natsu pressed his lips into a thin line before he exhaled heavily. "Suit yourself. Don't say I didn't warn ya." He grabbed the cape draped over his chair, fastening it around his neck before heading for the door.
Lucy blinked, momentarily thrown off. It was a little strange seeing him wear something like that- another stark reminder that he was more than just her goofy teammate, more than just a Fairy Tail mage. He was a prince. And honestly... she thought he pulled the look off well. Heat crept up her face again.
Oh, brilliant thinking Lucy. Great time to be focusing on that. She internally scolded herself as she quickly followed him while they moved through the airship's corridors. Natsu walked with intent, his movements purposeful. Whatever he was about to do, she could tell he was completely set on it.
Eventually they rounded a corner and were met with a blast of hot, dry air as the ship's massive ramp stretched down into the sands below. Descending the ramp, Lucy saw, standing just out from the ship, a handful of the Spriggan 12- Invel, Irene, God Serena, Brandish, Jackal, Rusty, as well as two she didn't recognize. One was a well-built man in a black suit with a large forehead, a skull tattooed in the center.
But it was the second man who truly caught her attention. He also had a tattoo, of a white cross, in the middle of his forehead, but... what really struck her was his blonde hair- its distinct shade an unmistakable match for the First Master.
As they approached, Lucy saw the young man smirk, amusement flickering in his orange eyes. He opened his mouth-
"Not a word, Larcade." Natsu cut in, his tone sharp.
Larcade's smirk was wiped off his face, as if an invisible force had just slammed his mouth shut. He shot Natsu an incredulous, offended look.
Ignoring him, Natsu strode toward Zeref, who stood a few paces ahead. Zeref looked over his shoulder, his dark eyes gleaming with amusement as he saw them approach. An unsettling smile slipped onto his face.
"Well, well, well." His voice was smooth, almost teasing. "I take it this means you two have worked out your problems?"
Something about the way he looked at them made Lucy's stomach twist. Even with all she had learned, it was hard to wrap her head around the fact that this really was Natsu's older brother.
However, Natsu's next words to him caught Lucy completely off guard.
"We started to." Natsu clarified. "But you need to wipe that creepy-ass smile off your face or we're gonna have even more problems."
Zeref's smile vanished instantly, his lips settling into a thin line as he shot Natsu an irritated glance.
Despite the tension and anxiety she felt, Lucy almost laughed.
That's really how they treat each other?
She was still trying to accept there was more to Zeref Dragneel- that combination of words still sounded weird, even in her thoughts- than just being the black mage, a legendary harbinger of destruction. And then there was Natsu, still struggling to accept her friend was the black mage's little brother, ultimate etherious, and prince of a world superpower.
But right now they just sounded like two normal siblings picking at each other. It was almost absurd.
Before Lucy's mind could dwell on the subject any further, a strong gust of wind whipped her hair into her face. Pushing it back, she finally took a good look at their surroundings.
A vast desert spread in every direction. Sand dunes rippled beneath an ominous sky, heavy with dark clouds.
A growing unease settled in her stomach. "Wait... why are we in the middle of a desert?"
Natsu exhaled. "The spell we're about to do is massive. It needs a ton of space."
Lucy's brow furrowed. "Wait, what spell?"
Before Natsu could answer, Rusty stepped forward, his expression alight with excitement. "You should be honored, little fairy," He proclaimed, spreading his arm as his jacket billowed dramatically behind him. "For today, you're about to witness what it truly means to live in the ultimate magic world!"
Lucy stiffened. The ultimate magic world- that phrase triggered a distant memory. Her blood ran cold as realization struck.
"You... you were with Grimoire Heart!" She exclaimed.
Rusty smirked. "Ah, you do remember. I'm flattered."
While Lucy had never met this particular dark mage, she remembered Evergreen mentioning something about fighting a 'drama club reject' during their guilds' clash on Tenrou Island. This had to be him.
She crossed her arms. "Guess you didn't learn your lesson after Tenrou Island."
Rusty chuckled, completely unbothered. "On the contrary," He said smoothly, "I admit, weeks ago, your words would have enraged me. But no longer." His smile grew, and his eyes gleamed with pride. "I have since cast aside Hades and his lies! I've embraced His Majesty's true ultimate magic world! One where magic has no limits, no restrictions, yet mages and non-mages work together for the betterment of society!"
Lucy looked surprised. That wasn't what she had expected to hear.
Rusty nodded toward Natsu. "And it's all thanks to His Highness my eyes have been opened to the truth."
Her eyes snapped to Natsu, startled.
Natsu groaned, rolling his eyes and rubbing the back of his neck. "Look Luce, Rusty's being dramatic as Hell, but I meant what I said earlier. The way magic is handled in Alvarez is way better than the Council's rules."
Before Lucy could respond, another voice interrupted.
"You know, I'm curious now, Lucy." Zeref's smooth voice came, addressing her with a soft smile on his face. "What do you think of the ultimate magic world Rusty described? Dramatics aside, his assessment is accurate of how the empire operates."
Lucy hesitated. She hadn't expected to be asked her opinion-especially not by Zeref. And stranger still, he didn't seem to be mocking or taunting her. He seemed genuinely curious.
She glanced at Natsu briefly, and then answered, "Honestly... it doesn't sound bad. The Council does go overboard far too often for my liking." She crossed her arms. "But no rules on magic at all? That just seems like a disaster waiting to happen."
To her surprise, Zeref nodded. "That's a fair answer. I would agree."
Lucy blinked, surprise evident. "Wait... you do?"
"As do I."
Lucy spun on her heel at the new voice. At the base of the airship's massive ramp stood August. Her breath caught. Not because of him, but who he had with him.
First Master!
Mavis Vermillion lay unconscious, floating next to the wizard king, who had clearly cast a levitation spell on her. She was wrapped in a white blanket, her golden hair spilling behind her like liquid sunlight. As August stepped forward, Mavis's body floated with him.
"Magic is a tool," August continued, "but tools require responsibility. Some spells are simply too dangerous, too powerful to be left unchecked."
Passing Lucy, he came to stand beside Rusty, and only then did Lucy process what she was seeing. Mavis was actually breathing. Slow, steady, quiet- but unmistakably alive.
Wait... they were actually able to wake her from the coma Zeref's curse put her in?
"That said," August went on, turning to face them, "we have exercised extreme caution leading to this moment."
Before Lucy could interject further, Rusty exhaled and stretched, then turned to address the two Dragneel brothers; "Now, Your Highness, Your Majesty, before we can proceed, I'll need to peer into one of your memories. Since you designed the spell," He said, nodding at Zeref, before shifting his gaze to Natsu, "and you saw it up close, either one of you should suffice."
Zeref turned to his brother, a knowing smile tugging at his lips. "You know, Natsu, I never did get to see the version of the spell you witnessed before it was destroyed. Care to indulge your big brother's curiosity?"
Natsu narrowed his eyes. "I think you're lazy and just don't wanna walk over there. But sure, whatever."
With an irritated huff, Natsu stormed over to Rusty, August, and Mavis. Rusty reached out, touching a palm to Natsu's forehead, closing his eyes and his features tightening in intense concentration. The air between them pulsed with unseen energy.
Minutes passed. Then, abruptly, Rusty's eyes snapped open. A smirk slowly spread across his face.
"I have it."
Natsu exhaled sharply and made his way back over to Lucy and Zeref.
Lucy's unease continued to deepen. No one had answered her question. No one has told her what spell they were about to cast.
"Natsu..." she tried again, her voice laced with growing anxiety, "what spell is this?"
Natsu hesitated a moment before sighing. "Look Luce, I know you're not gonna like this. But... just try and understand where we're coming from."
Before she could press him further on what 'this' was, the magic in the air noticeably shifted.
A tidal wave of pure magic energy surged around them, thick and electric, drowning the desert in an ocean of raw power. Looking up, she saw August had placed a hand on Rusty's shoulder, magic rippling between them in an eerie, white glow. The ex-Grimoire Heart mage's smile was feverish, his grin stretched wide in anticipation.
Realization struck Lucy like lightning.
They're using Fairy Heart! But why-
Rustyrose spread his arms dramatically, as magic crackled around them like a living storm. "NOW!" His voice reverberated across the desert. "WITNESS THE APEX OF THE ULTIMATE MAGIC WORLD! WHERE EVEN DEATH BOWS BEFORE OUR WILL!"
His declaration sent a chill down Lucy's spine.
The magic around them surged to a crescendo, spiraling into a frenzy of light and force.
"ARC OF EMBODIMENT!" Rusty declared. "TOWER OF HEAVEN!" He leaned forward, then slammed his palms to the ground.
The world convulsed.
A blinding explosion of light erupted from the desert floor, engulfing Rusty, August, and Mavis. Lucy flinched, turning away as wind and raw magic tore through the air. It twisted, stretched, and climbed, clawing towards the Heavens like something alive.
When the wind finally died down and the light faded, Lucy lowered her arms and dared to look upon whatever they had conjured.
She wished she hadn't.
She had misheard, hadn't she?
She prayed she had.
But the monstrous structure before her left no room for doubt.
A twisted amalgamation of steel and shadow. A monument to suffering. A nightmare she thought they had rid the world of forever, rebuilt in an instant .
She had seen it before. The day they stormed its cursed halls to save Erza. The day they had destroyed it.
But now, impossibly, it stood again.
The R System. The Tower Of Heaven.
Risen once more.
Oh man, and things had been going so much better...muhahaha.
I've not written a word of the next chapter, but my outline for it is pretty in depth. So if no new chapter next week, there should be one the week after.
Special thanks to Valeska001 for beta reading again!
I'll see y'all next time for chapter 36, The Grand Conjuration!
Also don't forget to check out the spinoff, Keeping More Secrets, if you haven't already! CoolCarnage over on AO3 has come up with some hilarious scenarios!