Continuing the proud tradition of never actually publishing Christmas chapters near Christmas
There are bowers and halls,
All of pasty are the walls,
Of flesh, of fish, and rich meat,
The loveliest that man may eat.
Fat flakes of snow drifted down into the water of the Jade Bight, seeming to promise a white Christmas tomorrow. In theory, that would be a welcome relief from the final raid of the year, which happened to be one of those always enjoyable night missions.
Unfortunately, Friedrich wouldn't be tucking in early this Christmas Eve. Tomorrow wouldn't exactly be a festival, but there was still planning to do… at the very least, they could do it indoors. She reached the building first and waited as her sisters appeared from the snow. Luitpold's horns were already covered with a healthy dusting of snow when she arrived, while the tiniest little trail of the stuff piled up on the cigarette emerging from Kaiser's frown.
Once they were all gathered, Friedrich pushed the door open and let them inside. There was no reason to let more than one blast of freakishly cold air in, and they all rushed in quickly. Warrior women they might have been, but none of them were so masochistic as to linger in the cold on Christmas Eve.
Still, there might have been some minor silver lining to the cold: it was so terrible as to banish drowsiness almost completely. Now that the chill was starting to creep out of their bodies, it was as if sleepiness was creeping in to take its place. Luitpold seemed to tuck herself into her cape a bit… Friedrich smiled.
"What are we doing, again?" Kaiser asked.
"We're planning Christmas," Friedrich said.
"What, you're Father Christmas now?"
"If you don't want your gift, there's no reason for you to attend…"
Kaiser's interest was piqued. "My gift?"
"It's a surprise," Friedrich replied.
Kaiser squinted at her for a moment. "Is my surprise going to be a sister? Do you have a cube ready?"
"Unfortunately, no. Luitpold?"
"Fat load of nothing," Luitpold answered, frowning.
"No fourth sister for Christmas, then," Friedrich said.
"Maybe one of the Bayerns…?" Kaiser murmured.
"Excellent segue, my dear Kaiser. The important thing tomorrow is the Bayerns and their Christmas. If either of them has a cube ready, it is going to Sachsen."
"The admirals never told me anything like that."
"They haven't told me, either," Friedrich answered. "I would just prefer to give the Bayerns a chance to meet their next sister for Christmas, if possible."
Kaiser huffed, liberating a few bits of ash from the tip of her cigarette. "I suppose…" She had been antsy to see their set completed. Almost everyone had that desire, to some extent. Seydlitz didn't have to worry about it, but her position was also unenviable. The Pillau and Graudenz classes were the only complete sets, and they had never known anything else…
"Is that the only reason you're keeping us out of bed, Friedrich?"
"No. We have to plan the festivities, after all." Kaiser stood up a bit straighter in her seat, while one of Luitpold's eyebrows arched expectantly.
Friedrich and Luitpold shared a room, while Kaiser had the next one over all to herself. It occurred to Friedrich that her desire to meet their fourth sister might clash with Kaiser's deep, impassioned desire for a room of her own, but maybe Kaiser hadn't thought that far. Or maybe she'd bite the bullet and accept her sister with open arms. She had very high hopes for Kaiserin. Not in a strange way, mind. Kaiser had no interest in the typical… relations between emperor and empress, focusing more on the idea of some perfect complement to herself.
Hopefully, their poor sister wouldn't end up becoming Kaiser's full-time minder. Friedrich and Luitpold were both up and in the hall before they heard so much as a peep from Kaiser's room, and after telling Luitpold to get started on the celebrations, Friedrich went to retrieve her other sister. The darkness of the room was pierced only by the light from the hall, a bar of light highlighting a slice of one of the prints adorning the wall. It was a bit of a trick to get their hands on paintings, so Kaiser's collection consisted of clumsy prints and photographs from across the world. Germany, Germany, Kamerun, Germany, Qingdao, German soldiers, Namibia…
Speaking of impressive German sights: sometime between the wee hours of Christmas Eve and the light of early morning, Kaiser had sprawled herself across her bed terribly, turning the sheets into a horrific tangle. Honestly, Friedrich wasn't sure how someone could reach that position without deliberately trying while awake… but that didn't particularly matter. Laying a hand on her sister's shoulder, she shook her awake. "Good morning, Kaiser."
"Huh…?" Kaiser groaned. After regaining her senses, she pulled back as much as she could while in bed. "Friedrich!?" She squawked. "Get out, get out!"
"Pardon me, then." Leaving the room and closing the door behind her, she came face to face with a grinning Luitpold.
"Maybe you should take after Father Christmas, Friedrich."
"What do you have in mind, Luitpold? I don't believe I could manage a beard."
"More like… start worrying about Kaiser's dowry money. We won't be able to convince a man to take her otherwise."
Friedrich didn't laugh, but her lips may have curled up a bit. "I don't seem to recall that Christmas story."
"More of a Saint Nicholas story than a Christmas one," Luitpold conceded, shrugging her shoulders. "He apparently threw money into the house of some man who couldn't pay his daughter's dowries. Charity, or whatever."
"And the money-throwing became Christmas as we know it?"
"Sounds simpler than picking out presents, I'll say…" Luitpold said.
Eventually, Kaiser came out of her room, wearing the same sort of quasi-military clothing she wore all the time. Today's outfit was a bit nicer than her usual fare, every bit of it that could shine already buffed to a perfect sheen. She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and scowled. "Well, are we waiting for something?"
Fortunately, things were not so dire as to force them to cook themselves – men from their crew could be press-ganged into that duty since they knew the secret – but they could still dictate the menu. Not that they had a tremendous list of items to choose from. Things weren't quite as bad as the civilians had it, considering that a large portion of the nation's calories were headed the military's way, but they didn't have the makings of some grand Christmas feast either.
"Turnips? What are we, pigs?" Kaiser asked, looking at the root in her hands with horror.
"We're making do, as patriotic Germans should do," Friedrich corrected her. "And I assume it will taste better in au gratin."
"Au gratin?" Kaiser asked. "With cheese and cream?"
"With cheese and cream," Friedrich confirmed
"God, how could we… wait. How did we get that stuff?"
"You should thank Bayern and Baden. They haven't had meat or dairy for the past month."
"Why not?" Kaiser eyed the portion of cheese like she was looking for mold.
"Some sort of fasting, as I understand," Friedrich said. "Luitpold?"
"Hmm?" Luitpold had been (fairly) distracted by the amount of meat they had to eat. In addition to whatever Baden and Bayern hadn't eaten over the past month, there was a surprisingly generous portion of pork for the shipgirls as a Christmas treat, plus some game and fish from East Frisia proper. "Oh, they're doing some sort of fast for Advent. You didn't notice? They were doing it since… Martinisingen?"
"Really?" Kaiser asked. "I definitely remember Martinisingen, but weren't they eating goose the day after?"
"Martinmas was one day after Martinisingen, wasn't it?" Friederich asked, only partially paying attention as she overlooked the food. Her namesake had some interest in agriculture, inasmuch as it made a stronger state. What would her illustrious forebear have thought of the mess Prussia was in now?
"Why are Catholics celebrating Luther, anyway?" Kaiser asked.
"They weren't celebrating Luther, they were celebrating Martin of Tours," Luitpold replied.
"Two Martin days right together is a bit too much of a coincidence, isn't it?"
(Kaiser would sneak off at some point to look up Martin Luther's birthday, just to prove a point. November 10th, one day before Martinmas. Now was a fair time to have Luther on the mind, though. Four hundred years since the Reformation began… and Germany had moved beyond that sort of thing, for the most part. Sure, the Reformation played no small part in forming the Germany they knew today, but wars of religion had been superseded by wars between nations, nations who might just happen to consider a religion some small part of their grander national identity.
And if they really wanted to talk religion and national identity, Martin of Tours had his own special place in the hearts of Frenchmen… at least, those of the Third Republic.)
At the very least, they were getting the most out of what they had. They could essentially borrow some of the best chefs from every ship on base and press them into helping with this one operation. Admittedly, that might have hurt the men's Christmases a bit, but the shipgirls reserved their right to indulge. This was their very first Christmas, after all.
The coffee they drank was at best a bit more than half coffee, the bread was supplemented with potatoes, and the mashed potatoes were supplemented with turnips… but it was Christmas. Company did something to sweeten even the bitterest ersatz substitute, and they certainly weren't lacking for that. Even the black sheep of their bunch, Derfflinger, made an appearance, although it seemed like she forgot to wash the oil off of her hands before Lutzow dragged her over.
Even though the party was just shipgirls, they needed two tables end to end to sit everyone down. That was certainly proof that their numbers had ballooned since Jutland, and Seydlitz smiled at them from her place at the head of the table. (Lutzow had ceded the seat to Seydlitz so she could sit closer to Derfflinger.) No one ate until Seydlitz spoke:
"I'm glad we're all here tonight. This is an undeniably dangerous profession, and we've been quite fortunate to not suffer casualties so far…"
With the expression Derfflinger was wearing, Friedrich almost wondered if she had managed to get her hands on a lemon in the black market. Lutzow noticed her sister's discomfort and spoke up: "Lighten the mood a bit! It's Christmas!"
A few chuckles. Seydlitz cleared her throat and raised her glass of wine. "Pardon. Here's to the end of the first year of our lives, and to our victory. Gott mit uns!"
"Prost!" Almost everyone was having wine. Even Bayern and Baden had been allowed a few token sips of the stuff, although they were being carefully watched by Luitpold and Friedrich respectively. Both of their faces scrunched up when they had their first sip, and Friedrich chuckled. They were too sweet.
Really, Friedrich was surrounded by big eaters. Baden to her left, Bayern across from her, and Kaiser on her right. Only two of those people had the excuse of just coming off of a fast and being – possibly – growing girls. Gratin, mashed potatoes, and enough birds to fill a small aviary just… disappeared in front of them.
Friedrich ate her fill and still managed to have a bit of bird sitting before her. It had been stuffed with… nuts and grain? It was certainly fancier than the typical fare she got on her ship, but she couldn't bring herself to finish. Some part of it was probably lacking appetite – although hers failed before Kaiser's, like the woman didn't smoke – but the rest was probably noticing the way Bayern seemed to be seriously considering licking her plate clean.
Looking at it for a second, Friedrich made a rough estimate and started cutting the meat into three pieces. Two ended up roughly the same size, but one was a bit smaller than she had hoped… no matter. One of the bigger pieces went to… "Here you are, Baden."
"Thank you, ma'am."
The second, of course, went to Bayern. "Thank you, Freddie!" She chirped, digging in immediately.
Unfortunately, Kaiser got the smallest piece. She had intended equal portions, really… Kaiser frowned as it was placed on her plate, narrowing her eyes at Friedrich. With a scowl, she sawed the meat into two pieces and leaned over Friedrich to give Baden and Bayern a bit extra.
"Thank you, Kaiser!" They chorused. Her sister smiled.
The snow had stopped coming down, although it still crunched under their feet when they walked about. Bayern was playing in the snow, while Kaiser and Friedrich's breath formed a fog in front of them as they walked.
"... Thank you for earlier, Friedrich."
"Thank you, Kaiser." Her sister's cheeks colored above the collar of her coat.
Both of them were walking back to their room, leaving Luitpold and a few of the others to drinking that was a bit more… intense. Regensburg and Graudenz seemed very confident, and it was looking like they'd get themselves decently drunk before they started hitting the real swill. Hopefully, they wouldn't be able to taste it by that point.
They got inside, kicked some of the snow off their boots, and hung up their coats… but not before Friedrich slipped something out of her pocket and offered it to her sister. "Merry Christmas, Kaiser."
Gingerly, Kaiser took the pipe that Friedrich offered her. "Thank you, Friedrich… I, ah, I don't know how to smoke this thing."
"I figure one of your crew might know. And here's a jar of tobacco for you."
"Your gift is in my room," Kaiser said. "Come on."
She followed her sister, and got a look at her room with lighting this time. It seemed like she had acquired a few prints since the last time she had taken a good look – Friedrich certainly didn't remember her namesake glowering at her from the corner last time.
Kaiser went up the bed and climbed to the top bunk, the one she never used. Cautiously, she lifted up a heavy wooden box and turned to Friedrich. "Can you grab it? I don't want to climb down with this."
"Certainly."
Friedrich took it, and Kaiser smiled. "Merry Christmas. Set it down, and maybe we can play…?"
Looking down at the box, she could see a grid on its top, surrounded by rough carvings of a woodland scene. An eight-by-eight grid. Setting it down and looking inside, she was faced with her namesake again. The wooden bust was a little rough around the edges, but it was inarguably Fredrick the Great, the king of this chess set.
"Thank you, Kaiser."
"Would you like to play?"
"I believe I have time for a game."
What followed was… not the most spectacular showing on Kaiser's part. Happily, she didn't seem to get too upset about that. Instead, they talked. The origins of the chess set at first – a few members of her crew she convinced to do some carving – and then Christmas, and then the origin of the holiday. The origin of everything, depending on what you believed.
Kaiser fiddled with one of Friedrich's bishops as she contemplated her next move. "What do you think about it, Friedrich?"
"I… I suppose it does seem as if we've been furnished a fitting stage for our performance… but doesn't it seem that we've been left to compose our own part for ourselves?"
Epigraph sourced from CELT, the Corpus of Electronic Texts, which has a collection of digital Hibernian texts in Irish, Latin, English, etc. After wrassling with the first of the Kildare poems, I found a few lines I could sort of comprehend if I squinted. It's like Chaucer but I wrote most of the chapter and the epigraph before finding the translation. (I may be stupid.) The poem itself speaks of Cockaigne: a mythical land of plenty - almost like the Big Rock Candy Mountains, to cite an American folk song - where the shingles are cake and the pegs are sausage, etc. But it's also a parody about the behavior of monks at the time so the latter verses get a bit more ribald.
I hope my research re: Martinmas and Martinisingen was right.