Yunyun tossed and turned on her bed, her mind riddled with thoughts about her conversation with Wiz.
She clutched her blanket tightly, her face buried in her pillow as she let out a frustrated groan.
The others were downstairs enjoying the sweets Megumin had bought them, but here she was, wrapped up in her thoughts.
'Why am I like this!?'
No matter how hard she tried to calm down, her heart wouldn't stop racing.
It had started off so simple. Wiz had reassured her, told her it was okay to think about her own feelings. And in the moment, it made sense. Comforting, even.
Which was why she had been able to go with everyone to the training session.
But now?
Now she was spiraling.
Every little moment, every little glance, every single thing about Naruto suddenly felt… different.
Or maybe it had always been different and she was just now realizing it?
Yunyun groaned again, rolling over onto her stomach, her legs kicking up in frustration.
"I-it's not like I like him like that!"
She whispered fiercely to herself before pausing.
Then she turned red.
Squeezing her eyes shut, she hugged her pillow tightly.
Okay. Okay. She needed to be logical about this! Logical!
Naruto was her friend. One that called her a friend back without hesitation or teasing.
She admired him, sure. She looked up to him, of course! And yes, he was strong, dependable, and… and nice.
He had always treated her kindly.
And… he was a little handsome…
Yunyun shot up in bed, clutching her blanket as if it could physically stop her thoughts.
Shaking her head, the Crimson Demon got out of bed and stepped into her sandals. Maybe some water would help clear her thoughts.
As she descended the stairs, Yunyun noticed Megumin, Aqua, and Darkness huddled up in front of the bathroom door. Walking up to them, the timid mage opened her mouth to speak, but hesitated.
What if they were having an important conversation? Would she be interrupting? Maybe it would be best if she just-
"Oh, Yunyun! Get this! Naruto and Kazuma just went into the bathroom to talk about 'guy stuff'! Those two are up to something!"
Aqua huffed as she glared daggers at the door.
"Yeah… They've been in there for a while now, too. I wonder what they're talking about…"
Megumin trailed off, her arms crossing over her chest.
"T-they must be talking about us…! Knowing Kazuma, he's probably convincing Naruto to talk about which of us he'd rather devour first! Could this trigger something in that prudish closet pervert!?"
Darkness's cheeks burned as her mind began to wander, but she quickly averted her gaze when Megumin sent her a deadpanned look.
'I don't think Naruto would talk about that kind of thing… Nor is he a closet pervert.'
Is what Yunyun wanted to say, but didn't want to arouse anymore suspicion from her rival.
Aqua, however, had already spiraled into a far more irrational train of thought.
"No no no! This can't be happening…. After all the hard work I've done to hold back that man's awakening!"
She looked ready to kick the door down with holy judgment when it suddenly opened.
Kazuma stepped out, his entire body radiating bliss. His face was slack with absolute tranquility, and his posture was loose and relaxed. He looked like a man who had just transcended to a higher plane of existence.
Megumin and Darkness took a weary step back, the boy's demeanor creeping them out.
"…Kazuma? What… what happened to you?"
They hesitantly asked, and the boy took a deep breath.
Then, in the softest, most peaceful voice they had ever heard from him, he murmured.
"…I have ascended."
Silence.
Aqua's face scrunched up.
"What nonsense are you saying? Did the bath melt your brain? Do you need me to cast healing magic on your head?"
Before anyone could press him further, Naruto stepped out of the bathroom next, looking far less blissful than Kazuma.
"I know I was the one who suggested it… But somehow, I feel like I just lost something."
The shinobi muttered with eyes that reflected said loss.
That did nothing to ease the confusion.
"What the hell does that mean!?"
Megumin demanded, eyes darting between the two boys.
Before Naruto could explain, Kazuma suddenly pulled him to the side.
The movement was so abrupt, it only made the three girls even more suspicious.
"You absolutely cannot tell them…!"
Kazuma hissed under his breath.
"What? Why?"
Naruto asked in confusion, and the boy's grip tightened.
"If they find out what we did, I'll never hear the end of it!"
"What? That I gave you a massage-"
"SHHHHH! Don't say it out loud, you idiot!"
Earlier…
"Absolutely not."
Kazuma flatly said while putting his hand up.
"Why not? It'll help with your soreness."
Naruto scowled. Why was this guy always so difficult?
"Because it's weird! A guy massaging another guy? Pass. If I'm getting a massage, it's going to be from a beautiful Onee-san."
The former NEET stated with a firm nod, causing the blonde to deadpan.
"Are you serious right now?"
"Yes! If I have to endure something like that, I at least want it to be enjoyable! Sue me for having standards!"
"…Are you kidding me?"
Naruto's expression shifted into one of absolute disdain, and this only seemed to irritate Kazuma further.
"D-don't look at me like that! You did this to me! I haven't been able to properly relieve my stress ever since you ruined the Naruko-chan experience at that shop! Do you have any idea how long it's been since she last healed my broken soul!?"
"Oh my god, you're still mad about that!?"
The shinobi's eye twitched in irritation.
"Yes, I am! You ruined it! And in turn, I absolutely refuse to be massaged unless it's by Naruko-chan! My Naruko-chan! Not the eldritch nightmare you created."
Kazuma sat back smugly, thinking he had won. Because there was no way that guy would go that far just to prove a point-
"I get it."
Naruto suddenly said, causing his fellow Adventurer's expression to crack.
"...Huh?"
"I want to support your growth, and if that's what it takes to make you more comfortable for the massage… then I'll do it."
"..."
Kazuma's face went pale.
Oi oi… Did this guy know what he was agreeing to? If they went through with this, then it would be a line they wouldn't be able to cross again.
"Alright, let's go to the bath. The masseuse that taught me the Massage skill said it's best to do it in a steamy room-"
"W-wait, I was just kidding! I don't want to!"
Kazuma fearfully sprang up from the couch, his sore muscles screaming at him to stay put. But Naruto grabbed onto his arm to prevent his escape.
"Why are you suddenly backing down, you scaredy cat!? Don't you want to get stronger!? I would have killed for a recovery method like this back then!"
"Why are you so eager to massage me, huh!? Is this another prank!? Are you going to pull another Toady-kun on me like last time!?"
"T-this guy…! I get why you're so suspicious, but I'm genuinely trying to help you! This is embarrassing for me too, ya know!?"
Naruto barked before forcibly calming himself. It wouldn't help getting so frustrated. So he smiled, albeit a bit strained.
"I consider you a good friend, ya know? Of course I'll do anything to help you achieve your goals."
The sheer sincerity in the blonde's words sent a shiver down his spine. Not because it was touching, but because it meant he was completely serious.
This wasn't a bluff.
This wasn't a joke.
This was happening.
…Like hell it was!
"N-no, seriously, I take it back! I don't need a massage!"
Kazuma tried again, planting his feet against the floor and leaning back like a man being dragged to his execution.
"Stop squirming! If you don't let me do this, you'll be too sore to train tomorrow!"
"Fine by me! I'd rather suffer in agony than let this happen! I'll just sleep all day until I recover! It might take a couple weeks, but so be it!"
Kazuma flailed uselessly, but Naruto's grip was firm.
"This guy…! Quit being so dramatic! It's just a massage! I promise I'll be gentle!"
"T-t-that makes it worse!"
As Kazuma's protests grew more frantic, Naruto became visibly annoyed.
"Would you just shut up and accept it!? I already told you it's gonna be fine!"
"It's not fine! There's an atmosphere, damn it! A setting! This is the kind of thing that needs careful planning! And candles! And-"
"What the hell are you even-"
"-IT HAS TO BE A WOMAN!"
The words echoed through the room, bouncing off the walls as both men froze in place.
A heavy silence followed.
Naruto's expression flatlined.
Kazuma, realizing what he had just blurted out, felt a cold sweat drip down his neck.
That had been loud.
He turned to Kiki, who was resting in the corner of the room, but she was watching their interaction with one eye open.
'Please tell me you were
'...Heh.'
This cheeky fox…!
"Oi! What the hell was that about!?"
Megumin's suspicious voice rang out from the dining room, followed by the distinct scrape of a chair being pushed back.
"Yeah, yeah! What's going on in there!? Why are you two screaming about women!?"
Aqua chimed in next, her tone dripping with disapproval.
"If you two are discussing something depraved, I absolutely must hear all the details…!"
Darkness followed shortly after, though with a slightly more concerning tone.
Kazuma paled, pure panic settling in his chest.
Naruto had the gall to just stare at him with that unreadable look, arms crossed as if he had all the time in the world.
"We're doomed…"
Kazuma muttered, his face now drained of color.
"Oh, so now you're worried about people hearing?"
Naruto smiled bitterly.
"Shut up! I wasn't thinking!"
"Could've fooled me."
They could hear the footsteps of the girls coming into the room.
Kazuma's mind screamed at him to think of something, anything, before Aqua burst in here and made things so much worse than they already were like usual.
In a moment of absolute desperation-
"I-I'm going to the bathroom with Naruto!"
"!"
Aqua stopped in her tracks.
Megumin blinked.
Darkness gasped softly, but whether it was in shock or something far less appropriate, Kazuma refused to find out.
The realization of what he had just shouted hit him like a truck.
Naruto, meanwhile, blinked once.
Then again.
"…Did you just agree?"
"..."
Kazuma opened his mouth.
Closed it.
Opened it again.
Nothing.
He had played himself.
Naruto's face slowly morphed into a smug smirk.
"Well, alright then. Sorry, ladies. But Kazuma and I have some guy stuff to talk about."
He said, yanking his fellow male along before he could take it back.
"Wait, wait, WAIT-"
SLAM!
The bathroom door shut behind them.
Present…
Kazuma gripped his fists tightly, his entire body trembling with frustration.
The worst part of it all…
The absolute worst part…
He didn't even look at Naruko-chan once!
Not a single peek! Not even a glance!
The massage was just that good!
His mind had gone completely blank, overtaken by a sensation so blissful that even the allure of his ideal fantasy form didn't matter.
That realization haunted him more than anything.
A maxed out Massage skill was a terrifying thing.
"Alright, spill it. What were you two really doing in there?"
Megumin demanded, her eyes glowing as if to reflect her growing suspicion.
"Yeah! Kazuma looked like he had ascended, and Naruto looked like he lost something important! What exactly happened!?"
Aqua added while pointing at the two of them.
Yunyun watched the scene before her nervously. She had faith in her party member, but she was also curious as to what the two of them had been doing in the bathroom.
Naruto glanced at Kazuma, who was silently pleading with his eyes.
After a beat, the shinobi sighed and rubbed the back of his neck.
"I was just… asking Kazuma for advice."
. . .
"Bahahaha! You asked that hikiNEET for advice!?"
Aqua howled with laughter, clutching her stomach.
"Naruto, I have to tell you this. Kazuma, who lacks common sense and doesn't hold back, is not someone you should go to for wisdom… Unless you were seeking tips on how to completely and utterly defeat your opponents after you've already won…!"
Darkness's eyes widened with expectation, earning a flat look from the shinobi.
'Coming from the sheltered ojou-sama…!? Also, what do they take me for!?'
Kazuma twitched violently, but he held his tongue. If he lashed out now, it would only circle back to bite him in the ass.
Aqua wiped a tear from her eye, barely containing her giggles.
"Naruto, come on! If you needed advice, you should've come to me, the wisest member of the party!"
"Isn't your Intelligence your lowest stat?"
Naruto rebutted, causing the girl to shoot him a teary-eyed glare.
"Actually, Kazuma was surprisingly forthcoming. I wasn't expecting him to open up so much, but once we started talking, he just kept going. It was actually really interesting.""
The shinobi continued, and Kazuma froze.
…What?
Kazuma raised an eyebrow, an uneasy feeling growing in his gut. Just what was this guy going on about?
"In fact, he had a lot to say about each of you three."
"!"
The girls perked up immediately.
On the other hand, Kazuma paled.
That stupid ninja was about to get back at him, wasn't he?
"Well, first, he said that Megumin is impossibly smug for someone who still collapses after one spell."
"..."
Megumin's expression stiffened.
"And then he called Darkness 'the personification of a disaster-prone noble who should be in charge of nothing'."
"Wha-!"
Darkness balked, her face flushing red.
"Oh, and Aqua… Kazuma said, and I quote: 'Aqua is a complete and utter idiot. If she were stranded on an island and given one wish, she'd wish for a bigger island'."
Aqua's eyes twitched violently, a vein bulging on her forehead.
Kazuma, meanwhile, looked like he was on the verge of collapsing on the spot.
He was just about to deny everything when a horrifying realization dawned on him.
The massage.
He'd been so out of it, so utterly consumed by bliss, he had almost forgotten that Naruto had asked him a random, casual-sounding question like "What do you really think of your party members?".
Seeing the expressions on his party members, his hands balled into fists. He was already six feet under, but he had nothing to be ashamed about. Everything he said was true, after all.
"Yeah, I said it all! I just needed to vent to my friend in privacy, ya hear me!? But if you three want to hear what I have to say so badly, then I got plenty more complaints where that came from!"
"Ah!" x3
Grinning at his handiwork, Naruto left the dysfunctional party to their antics and walked around them. That was when he noticed Yunyun standing at the base of the stairs looking troubled.
"Oh, hey Yunyun. Got a minute before bed?"
"Ah, umm… S-sure!"
Yunyun hesitantly stepped into Naruto's room, her eyes darting around nervously as Naruto quietly shut the door behind her. The moonlight filtered through the open window, softly illuminating the room.
The boy seemed to have fully settled in.
A modest desk sat near the corner, cluttered with scrolls, some open with half-written notes, others rolled tight and sealed with unfamiliar markings. A few kunai and ink-stained brushes rested in a tray beside them.
Her gaze drifted to the far wall, where his vibrant orange cloak hung proudly.
A nearby shelf drew her attention next, or rather, the folded paper shaped like a toad that looked suspiciously lifelike, and a strange-looking straw. There was also a green wallet with foreign looking money stuffed in it… Perhaps these were artifacts from his home world?
She fidgeted with her sleeves, trying not to feel out of place. The room was undeniably Naruto's.
Practical, yet slightly unkempt. Just like him.
Why did he call her here at night? Why did it feel like something serious was about to happen!? Wait, was he about to confess something!?
"S-so... you wanted to talk?"
Yunyun asked, trying her best to keep her voice steady despite the growing storm of nervous energy inside her.
After lighting the lantern by the window, Naruto sat down on the edge of his bed, patting the space beside him in invitation.
Kiki, curled up in the corner of the bed, lazily cracked one eye open before letting it drift shut again, appearing to slip right back into sleep.
The timid mage swallowed so hard she nearly choked, hesitantly taking the seat. Her hands clasped together in a desperate attempt to keep from fidgeting, but her legs betrayed her as they bounced lightly in place.
"Yeah, I've just been a little worried. You've seemed kinda down since that whole thing with Wiz, and it looks like Megumin's been teasing you. I just wanted to make sure you were okay."
Naruto replied with a sheepish smile.
Yunyun's eyes widened slightly, her cheeks instantly burning at the boy's considerate words.
"I-I'm fine! Really!"
She blurted out, waving her hands frantically before realizing she probably looked extremely suspicious. She tried to rein it back in, shrinking slightly.
"I-I just... I was hoping things might go differently between you two. I thought that…"
Her words died in her throat as her embarrassment hit critical levels, to the point where steam threatened to spout from her ears.
"Don't worry about it, Yunyun. Things turned out okay… Wiz and I are good."
Naruto assured with a simple smile, oblivious to the internal meltdown occurring next to him.
"I also wanted to talk to you about something that's been making me a bit nervous."
"N-nervous...? You?"
Naruto was never nervous. He was confident, borderline reckless. For him to admit that something was making him nervous-
Wait.
Yunyun's mind skidded to a halt.
'Could he be talking about... me!?'
Did Wiz already say something weird to him!?
Was this really a confession!?
It was then she realized something. Wasn't this situation kind of amazing?
Right now, she was alone with a boy, in their room! At night!
While they had conversed back in Naruto's room at the inn, this small and enclosed space in the mansion made the moment feel so much more... intimate.
Yunyun's nervousness immediately hit a boiling point.
"It's about Claire. You remember what she said to me back in the capital, right? That declaration of courtship or whatever?"
Naruto suddenly said with an awkward chuckle, rubbing the back of his head.
"C-Claire-san?"
Yunyun repeated dumbly, her spiraling thoughts shattering like glass.
"Yeah. Ever since we got back, I've been thinking about what I should say to her. I mean, she's a great person and all, but I don't really know how to respond to something like that. What do you think I should do, Yunyun?"
Naruto sighed with a distant look in his eyes before turning to the girl.
Yunyun malfunctioned entirely.
She'd completely forgotten about Claire! How!?
Her mouth opened to speak, but all that came out was the sound of her breath.
Normally, such a question would have elated her. A friend asking for her help in the love department!
But with her mind in such a state, she nearly short-circuited on the spot. Her brain was stuck in a never-ending loop of panic, unable to properly process the situation.
Was she supposed to be encouraging him? Telling him to follow his heart? Denouncing Claire entirely?
No, no, no...
She needed to respond! Her friend was asking for help!
"I-I don't know…"
She stammered out, her face practically steaming at this point.
Why was she like this? Why couldn't she just converse normally!? If Megumin were here, she would definitely be teasing her right now.
Before she could stop herself, her frustration took the wheel.
"But I think Claire-san doesn't really know the true Naruto! N-not like we do, at least…"
"Hmm... You know, Yunyun? You're right. I think I've been overthinking this way too much."
Naruto said after some consideration, his head nodding slowly.
Yunyun blinked.
…Eh?
Just like that, all of Naruto's tension faded. He let out a relaxed laugh, stood up, and stretched as if she'd just casually given him life-changing advice.
"I think I know what I'm going to say to Claire now. Thanks for the talk."
Yunyun's mind was still catching up, running full-speed into a brick wall of realization.
What... What just happened?
Naruto walked over to the window, giving her a casual glance over his shoulder.
"Oh, by the way. Wanna go on a quest after Kazuma's training tomorrow?"
"A-a quest?"
Just like that, Yunyun's anxiety instantly washed away as she smiled brightly and nodded.
Come to think of it, when was the last time the two of them went on a quest together?
"Great! I'm gonna go do some preparations for the training. See you tomorrow then, Yunyun."
And without warning, Naruto climbed up onto the window ledge and leapt out in one smooth motion. Kiki immediately sprang from the bed to follow after the boy.
"Wha-!?"
Yunyun bolted upright, rushing to the window just in time to see the two land effortlessly and disappear into the night.
Her cheeks burned as she stepped back, clutching her heart like it might leap out of her chest.
Why did he have to leave like that!? He nearly gave her a heart attack!
She collapsed back onto the bed, burying her face into the sheets.
They were going on a quest!
'I wonder what we're going to do... Does Luna have another durian quest for us?'
As the mage pondered on their potential tasks, she started giggling to herself.
What was she getting all stressed for?
That's right, the only thing she needed to worry about now was becoming a better mage so she didn't hold Naruto back during their quests!
'I'll work hard and make Naruto proud!'
Becoming giddy at the thought of receiving the shinobi's praise, Yunyun started giggling again.
Creak...
Her giggles froze in her throat as she turned toward the door.
Standing there was Darkness, who was wearing a thin pink nightgown. She had a surprised look on her face.
Yunyun blinked.
Darkness blinked back.
A silent minute passed, neither of them moving.
Then, awkwardly, the Crusader cleared her throat.
"Sorry… I was, uh... looking for Naruto."
"..."
Yunyun stiffened, her face turning bright red. That's right… She was still in Naruto's room, wasn't she?
"W-w-wait! I-I wasn't doing anything weird!"
She blurted out frantically when Darkness started closing the door.
"Wahaaaaaah!"
Kazuma's wailing screams pierced the morning scenery, which was then followed by a loud "thunk" as the boy was hurled into the air by a Running Hawkite.
Naruto winced, signaling for Kiki to bail the poor Adventurer out.
"Oof… That looked like it hurt. Darkness, why don't you substitute for now."
"W-with pleasure!"
Darkness, who had been doing push-ups with a boulder strapped to her back, gleefully stood up and ran towards the entrance to the structure Naruto and Kiki had created with earth magic.
The arena was much smaller than what he'd originally planned. Earlier that morning, one of the guards had politely asked him to limit his construction on the plains, so he reluctantly scaled it down. What remained was a narrow, straight course, bordered by low stone walls.
While yesterday's training had been designed to test Kazuma's resourcefulness, today was all about head-on combat.
Naruto recaptured the Hawkite with a Scroll Ball before it could circle back to finish off its opponent. Releasing the monster on the other side to face off against Darkness, the shinobi swapped places with Kiki as he hopped down to check on his friend.
"What happened, Kazuma? You were doing so good. Are you tired again?"
"Damn… Huff…! Huff…! Damn my low stats!"
Kazuma groaned from his comfortable spot on the grass.
While his soreness was nonexistent thanks to the event that would not be mentioned, his only weakness right now was just that… His weakness.
It seemed two fights was his limit before he would start getting really tired. While they had brought stamina potions to help him recover, the human body could only drink so much in a certain period of time.
It wasn't like a video game where you could just drink potion after potion to get out of a sticky situation. Even now, his stomach was hurting from the third stamina brew he'd drank before his fight with the Hawkite.
"Ah, it's fine. Building up your stamina is easy enough, you just gotta run everyday. But fighting while tired like that is the most crucial part of your training. It'll prepare you for the real thing when you're fighting for your life, down to the last breath!"
Naruto cheerfully explained while reaching down to help the guy up.
Kazuma groaned again, but accepted the offered hand.
"I get what you're saying, but do you even understand what it's like to have a stat sheet that sucks this much? You were probably born with ridiculous numbers! I, on the other hand, have had to suffer coming to this world with zero combat potential and no cheat-like abilities in the form of Aqua!"
"Actually… I really was dead last in my class. I didn't really go into too much detail when I was telling Iris those stories back at the capital, but yeah. I started out weaker than my peers with no talent. But I worked my ass off everyday because there was this one guy that I just couldn't lose to no matter what."
Naruto's expression grew wistful as he spoke, almost regretful.
Kazuma wanted to ask who this person was, but before he could, a loud cry echoed across the training grounds.
"Stop dodging and hit me already!"
The boys turned just in time to see Darkness swinging wildly, trying to land a blow on the Running Hawkite, which jumped over her effortlessly. The bird-like monster charged at her multiple times, only to leap at the last second, narrowly avoiding impact and leaving her standing there, completely unharmed and increasingly frustrated.
"Fight me properly, you cowardly beast!"
She declared, lifting her sword high above her head and bringing it down in a powerful strike,
but the Hawkite had already sidestepped, causing her attack to miss completely.
It ran at her again, wings tucked in, its full speed behind the charge. But once again, it jumped over her at the last second.
"WHY!?"
Darkness cried, spinning around, her eyes tearing up with frustration.
Naruto smiled bitterly. He almost forgot about that monster's natural instinct to run towards hard objects before avoiding them at the last second. Just her luck to face off against another opponent that would avoid her two days in a row.
Or maybe it was his luck that was preventing the girl from getting what she wanted? Oh well.
Darkness stomped a foot down, her entire body trembling with sheer indignation.
"Why was it fine hitting Kazuma, but not me!?"
"Because I'm squishy and pathetic, while you're hard and dependable. At least in the tanking department."
Kazuma stated bluntly, and both Naruto and Kiki both nodded in silent agreement.
'Mine master's creativity is most impressive. This one would have never thought to use nature and earth magic like this.'
'Heh… They don't call me unpredictable for nothing!'
Naruto boasted with his nose held high.
'If mine master approves, could this one be in charge of tomorrow's training?'
Kiki asked while looking up at the blonde eagerly.
"Really? Sure, I'd love to see what you can come up with!"
Naruto grinned, and the Kitsune nodded her head before scampering off towards the forest.
"What was that about?"
Kazuma asked as he watched the fleeting fox with narrowed eyes.
"Hehe… You'll find out tomorrow."
The shinobi responded with a chuckle.
'...Why do I feel like I should just stay home tomorrow?'
Kazuma thought as they went back to watching Darkness's pitiful battle with the Hawkite.
Meanwhile, at the top of the nearest hill, Megumin, Yunyun and Aqua sat on their tarp while eating today's snacks.
Aqua, beaming with pride, pulled out a small container and held it up like a priceless artifact.
"Behold! Mayonnaise!"
"Uh… okay?"
Megumin looked at the jar and raised an eyebrow.
"I brought this because I knew you'd all be eating these plain, boring rice balls just themselves. As a responsible goddess, I simply couldn't let that stand."
She scooped a generous glob onto her rice ball and took a very exaggerated bite, nodding sagely.
"I don't know, Aqua. That looks a little… much. I know this is rich coming from me, but maybe watch how much mayo you're putting on those rice balls."
Megumin gave her a skeptical glance.
Aqua gasped, dramatically clutching her chest as if she had been mortally wounded.
"Listen here, Megumin. True connoisseurs know that mayonnaise goes with everything. Rice balls, sandwiches, fried food, pudding-"
"Pudding…?"
Megumin recoiled at the thought of mixing two completely incompatible things.
"You just don't understand high class cuisine."
Aqua scoffed, waving a hand dismissively.
Megumin rolled her eyes, glancing down at the training grounds where Kazuma was still recovering from his latest defeat.
"Kazuma's still getting tossed around, huh? But it's almost like his endurance improved overnight. I was expecting him to complain about being sore all day."
"Serves him right after all those things he said about us. But yeah, it's weird… NEETs aren't supposed to have such a low recovery time."
Aqua muttered, licking mayonnaise off her fingers.
Megumin hummed before standing up. Her eyes flashed bright red as she pointed her staff towards the training grounds.
"It is a tragic fate to see such a structure reduced to a mere fraction of its former glory. However… Perhaps that is poetic in itself. To be born, to serve, and then to be obliterated in an instant by a mighty force. Yes… that is the way of all battlefields. The way of Explosion."
"There she goes again… You're just excited to blow it up later, aren't you?"
Aqua smiled wryly, and her party member silently lowered the rice ball while mumbling a silent "yes" under her breath.
Yunyun barely registered their conversation as she was lost in her own thoughts.
'Darkness must think I'm so weird after last night…'
She groaned internally, remembering the awkward encounter. Darkness had just been standing there, looking at her.
Had she been silently judging her? The Crusader didn't say anything on their way here…
Yunyun wanted to dig a hole and disappear forever.
'Although… Darkness said she was looking for Naruto.'
She wondered what the older girl wanted-
"Yunyun."
The timid mage flinched, jerking out of her thoughts to see Aqua staring at her.
"You were spacing out. What, feeling guilty about bad-mouthing Kazuma behind his back? Well, you shouldn't. I'm sure that hikiNEET had nothing good to say about you either."
"N-no! I-I wasn't! Also, K-Kazuma-san has been very kind to me!"
Yunyun adamantly defended the boy who allowed her the opportunity to spend so much time with her friends.
Wait, were the others her friends? Did they view their relationship like that? Maybe it was better to refer to them as acquaintances for now… Just in case they didn't see it that way.
"Yunyun was probably thinking about some weird things again. She's been sending Naruto longful glances lately."
Megumin casually said as she nibbled on a rice ball, causing her fellow clansman to nearly choke on her drink.
"I knew it! You almost fooled me with your shy archetype, but you're just a filthy homewrecker! No mayonnaise for you!"
Aqua held the jar close to her torso as if to protect it.
"W-wait, Aqua-san! It's not like that! I-I mean, it's true that I was thinking about Naruto just now… B-but only because we're going on a quest later!"
Yunyun's face burned as the other two eyed her suspiciously.
"Aqua, are you giving my party member a hard time again? Do I need to take your snacks away?"
Naruto asked as he walked up to the trio, with Kazuma and a very disappointed looking Darkness in tow.
Aqua's eyes widened fearfully, but seeing as their supply was already low, she exhaled a sigh of relief.
"Naruto! Your party member is suspicious! Now that the Lich is no longer a threat, she's planning to seduce you and make Eddy-chan cry!"
Aqua spouted such nonsense while pointing an accusing finger towards Yunyun.
'...Huh?'
Naruto deadpanned. What in the world were these three talking about?
"S-s-she's mistaken, Naruto! P-please, Aqua-san! Stop calling me a homewrecker! Rather, I really want to know more about this Eddy person I keep hearing about!"
Yunyun stammered while flailing her arms frantically.
"Very well! I shall tell you all about our cute and adorable Eddy-chan while we go on that quest."
Aqua stated with a firm nod.
"Eh?"
Yunyun blinked. Aqua was coming along with them now?
"Why are you coming along? Not that I mind, but I figured you'd head back to the mansion for your usual afternoon nap or something."
Naruto stated bluntly, causing the goddess to fume.
"Even I like to go on a quest every once in a while! Besides, I need to make sure that homewrecker doesn't do anything suspicious!"
The bluenette huffed with her arms crossed over her chest.
"A-Aqua… You can't just invite yourself. I'm sure Yunyun was looking forward to going on a quest with Naruto as party members."
Darkness tried to reason with the girl, but Aqua turned her dubious eyes on her.
"Oh? What's this? Is Susness feeling left out? I bet you want to go on this quest too, huh? Well you can't! Like that awkward mage, you've been suspicious too! As kindred spirits, surely you've noticed that girl's suspicious behaviors. Which is why it'll just be the three of us."
"W-well…"
The Crusader averted her gaze, causing Yunyun's face to turn redder than her eyes.
Oblivious to their awkward exchange, Naruto let out a sigh.
"This is getting nowhere, and we have a quest to do. Sorry, Aqua. But if you're going to be accusing my party member the entire time, then you can't come."
"What!?"
Aqua balked, clearly taken by complete surprise at the turn of events.
'What did she expect? Causing all this trouble…'
Kazuma thought while shaking his head. Rather than watch all of this rom-com BS, he just wanted to go back home and sleep.
"A-actually, it's okay if Aqua-san comes…"
Yunyun suddenly spoke up, and the attention of everyone immediately shifted to her, making her cheeks flush with embarrassment.
"Are you sure? You don't need to let that girl have her way, ya know? I'll just threaten to take her snacks away again."
Naruto asked, prompting the goddess to flinch and hide the last rice ball behind her back.
"O-of course! I'd be happy to adventure with everyone!"
The timid mage assured with a smile. While she had actually been looking forward to questing with her party member specifically, this would be a good opportunity to clear the air with the Arch Priest.
Also, she really wanted to ask more about Eddy. Did Naruto and Aqua really have a child that ascended to godhood? The boy always found a way to avoid the topic.
Not entirely convinced, the shinobi reluctantly nodded his head.
"If you say so… Then, Megumin. If you would do the honors."
"Very well! I will begin my preparations!"
As if she had been waiting all morning for this very moment, Megumin ran to the highest vantage point she could find.
Now standing atop the tallest hill, her crimson cloak fluttered dramatically in the breeze.
She raised her staff high, her ruby eyes gleaming with exhilaration.
"This training ground has served its purpose… It has witnessed struggles, defeats, and the unwavering determination of a great underdog forging himself through humiliating defeat after defeat-"
"Oi."
Kazuma muttered darkly, but Megumin ignored him.
"And yet, just as all things are destined to fade, so too must this field meet its grand and inevitable demise… A battlefield that has outlived its war is nothing but a hollow relic of the past, waiting to be claimed by the sands of time. But I shall not let it wither in obscurity!"
She slammed the butt of her staff into the ground.
"I am Megumin! The most powerful wizard in the town of Axel! No, my friends, this course shall not simply fade! It shall not crumble, nor be dismantled by mere hands! It shall not fall to erosion nor be reclaimed by the earth like some forgotten ruin!"
She spread her arms, eyes ablaze with unhinged glee.
"D-declaring yourself as the greatest wizard in Axel in front of your rival…! You're too sly, Megumin! I can destroy that structure with my magic too!"
Yunyun, her competitive side flaring, stormed over to her fellow mage.
"For it shall be-h-hey, stay back! You're ruining the moment! Honored in the only way that befits a warrior's grave! It shall be purged in fireshatteredinbrillianceandreducedtonaughtbuta magnificentcrater! Shoot forth! EXPLOOOOOSION!"
Megumin hastily fired off her spell before Yunyun could reach her.
A/N: Quest time! But what are they going to do? Hm…
Anyways, as some of you may have noticed, there is a new poll on my profile: "Which Omake would you like to see?" There's five titles to choose from, so pick whichever one sounds like the most fun!
As always, review and let me know what you thought of the chapter~!
Spirit out.