Chapter 13: Honeyed Violets and Chocolate
Four years before the 74th Games,
Katniss all but ran from the kitchen to Carina's bedroom, a tub of water in her hands and borrowed towels over her shoulder. She kicked the door to Carina's bedroom open with her foot, spilling some water on the floor. Her feet slipped but she quickly caught herself, raising the tub over her head to balance herself and skipped over the spillage to land on the floor next to Carina's bed.
Pale, shivering and cold Prim lay on the bed crying and moaning in pain. Dressed in a borrowed woolen sweater and wrapped in all the blankets and covers Carina and her grandfather could find, Prim still shook violently through those covers.
"Thank you for watching Prim, Mr Semor." Katniss said, dipping the towel into the bowl of warm water and squeezing it. "I know it's a lot—"
"Nonsense." Carina's grandfather barked out and placed his hand on Prim's cold forehead.
It was heating up again despite Katniss' desperate attempt to lower Prim's temperature. If she was left alone in that creaky old hut of a house the Everdeens called home, Prim would be lucky enough to barely recover.
He drew back from Prim and stood up, his knees buckling a little. "It's not safe for you girls to be in that house when your mother's acting like that."
He shouldn't have said that but the words had escaped his mouth before he could stop himself. And once he started, he didn't know when to stop.
Katniss visibly stiffened, her face heating up red in either rage or shame. Carina didn't know but she felt for her friend. She tugged at the back of her grandfather's shirt in quiet concern.
Her grandfather ignored her, moaning about Mrs Everdeen's uselessness and how unfair it was for Prim to suffer when her mother came from a family of healers. He really didn't know when to stop once he started.
In shame, Katniss bowed her head and rigidly moved to dip cloth into the tub of cold water, squeezing it out roughly. She ignored the burning cold sensation tainting her tan skin a pale blue.
Mrs Everdeen was a touchy subject for both Katniss and Prim. Neither of them liked talking about their mother. Whenever anyone asked about their mother, Prim would just smile and carry on as normal though at times, her eyes would tear up and she would throw herself at Carina or Katniss—whoever was the closest. Sometimes, she'd hide behind Roan.
But Katniss, on the other hand, was ashamed of her mother. Ashamed and angry. She never said it out loud but Carina knew. And whenever Mrs Everdeen was mentioned, Katniss refused help, thinking she was being a burden or worse, they were pitying her.
"The weather's changing and she's…she had a nightmare…a terrible nightmare about…" Katniss trailed off.
Carina patted her back in comfort and silently told her it wasn't her fault. She was doing a good job—a job that shouldn't have been hers.
"Have you tried to speak to your mother's family?" Mr Semor tentatively asked.
Katniss looked up, her eyes trembling in silent rage and on the verge of crying. "...No." A strangled rejection. "No, we haven't. They don't want to know us."
"But you should." He barked out, shaking his head. "I could—"
"Thank you, Mr Semor but healers cost a lot of money and that's money I–we don't have."
"That's not what I meant, Katniss."
"I know what you meant Mr Semor."
Mr Semor's sighed. He rubbed his tired weary eyes and said in a soft voice. "Those folks are your family Katniss even if they act like they're not. If you tell 'em about your mother's condition then maybe—"
"Not everyone's family is as kind as Dottie." Katniss replied, staring at a silent Carina. "If they were, I'd ask them to take Prim—she'd do well with them."
Mr Semor laughed. His laughter turned to coughs before he covered his mouth with an old stained handkerchief and said. "Dottie's not as kind as you'd think. She only let Carina have a job because she needed someone to take over when she's gone."
"And Carina is good at sewing."
"Not that good." Carina sat on the creaky chair across her bed. "You should've seen great aunt Dottie, she's really good. I've never seen anyone measure, cut and sew that fast."
Katniss smiled wryly and removed the towel from Prim's head, burying the burning feeling of envy deep. She dipped the towel in the warm bowl of water and squeezed out the excess again before placing it back on Prim's head.
"I'm sure you'll get that good one day."
"Who knows?"
"Well, I'll leave you girls and go make dinner." Mr Semor turned away and headed for the door. "But first, I need to go find Roan."
"He's probably in that old shed behind the house." Carina guessed.
The shed was his place, away from his room. Somewhere, he could picture being elsewhere.
Mr Semor spared another glance at Katniss and Prim, he sighed and dragged himself out the house. Roan would no doubt hear his footsteps and spring out into the garden, acting as if he was checking on the yield—there wouldn't be much apart from the still to be ripened lemons.
Katniss kept watch over her in silence. Sometimes whenever Carina saw Katniss like that, she felt upset. Her quaking, nearly blue lips and red eyes focused on Prim as if she was her anchor to life and her puffy face—she was so smaller—smaller than Roan yet the two were the same age.
Her shoulders were heavy and she wouldn't let anyone share her burden. She didn't trust them to. The most she trusted Gale and Carina to do was look after Prim when she was sick, nothing more. Gale could never be there all the time—he had to go hunting or look after his own family, Carina had more time.
Even so, she wouldn't dare just leave Prim and go on her day. She couldn't. She wouldn't move whenever Prim got sick. And Prim mostly got sick whenever Mrs Everdeen would have her infamous fits that everyone had learned to ignore.
"You sure you don't want to—" Carina tried to bring up Mrs Everdeen again.
"No!" Katniss shot up, her eyes bloodshot and her face dripping with sweat. "No. No. I-I don't want to talk to them. I don't know those people."
Carina sighed, laying down a blanket on the floor next to her bed. She sat down on a blanket, taking over Katniss' job and placed a damp towel on Prim's forehead. "I'm just saying…they are healers. They'd do a better job than grandpa and I, and they're your mother's fam—"
With her cheeks puffed up in silent rage, Katniss shook her head. "Don't you dare finish that sentence, Carin." She breathed out and Carina patted the floor next to her.
Reluctantly, she sat down and took Prim's hand into hers. "Her hands are so cold."
"She tried to take off a towel when you went out in the back."
"Towel was too cold."
"She was burning up, Katniss."
Katniss gnawed at the bottom of her lips. "Do you think I can trade some game for medicine for Prim?"
She could. There was no doubt about it. But Carina didn't answer her immediately. She just stared at Prim and replaced the towel. Those folks from the Capitol were still there—their presence was too strong to ignore. Carina wasn't even allowed to go near any of the fences since they'd arrived—Roan too.
Roan had made his presence small and kept himself busy in that old shed. He couldn't do much stuck inside the fence anyways.
"Carin?" Katniss asked and blocked her vision with her face. "What do you think? Sun's still out bright, if I head out—I can check on my mother and I can see if I can catch a rabbit or two—maybe I'll get lucky and find a turkey or some berries. I'll stay away from those 'shrooms."
"That's not the problem." Carina said and looked over her shoulder, her grandfather hadn't returned. "You know it's been strict around since those folks came to our district."
Katniss shifted in her seat, deflating with Carina's words. "I'll take Gale then. He said he wanted to go hunting—you don't have to come."
There was a strange flare of heat in her chest and Carina coughed, covering her mouth and turning away from Prim. Katniss tensed up. She reached over and checked Carina's forehead. Her cold hand sent a shiver down Carina's spine but she laughed and Katniss frowned.
But after a second, Katniss couldn't help it but spare her a smile. Carina's smile was the type that made anyone smile.
"You know winter's just a step away right? I think it'll snow next week." She pointed out as the laughter faded.
"All the more reason I should get out today." Katniss replied, stubborn and unmoved by Carina's attempts to keep her from the woods. "I might not find much to forage but maybe I'll find something. I can always fish."
"Aren't you tired?" Carina asked. "You've been running around all morning, even Gale's not this anxious whenever his siblings are sick."
Katniss made a sound, her head swaying to the side like it would fall any second. Carina gently pulled her towards her, laying Katniss' head down on her shoulders. She grumbled and complained under her breath but slowly, she became lighter as her worries seemed to split apart.
"Yeah, well, Gale has his mother." Katniss bit out. "And I…I'm all Prim has." She added, trying to keep the bitterness down.
But Carina saw right through her. Though, she didn't say it. Katniss didn't need to hear that.
"Gale also has us." Instead, Carina said. "It won't hurt if you leave Prim with us and take a breath. Give yourself a break."
"Says the one who's like a mother hen to Roan."
"Am not." Carina pouted. "Roan's just…Roan."
She paused and glanced over her shoulder as she heard a wooden floorboard creak. Speak of the devil and he'd walk in. She looked at her brother and hissed out his name and pointed towards the backdoor where her grandfather had left through.
Katniss momentarily lifted her head from her shoulders to look at Roan and she laughed—the first time that week. Roan rolled his eyes as he dragged a small sack in.
Little leaves and delicate stems spilled out of the sack and Carina glared at him. A sack of weeds? Really Roan? Her brother shrugged and innocently dragged the sack towards the kitchen.
Maybe there were some herbs in there. It was clear, he wasn't in that shed.
"You see what I have to deal with." Carina said plainly and her back ached, not with Katniss' head on her shoulder but rather out of the burden of what Roan was up to that day.
Katniss snorted. "Gale was right, you really are a mother hen."
"I'm not."
Katniss nodded along, acting like she believed her no matter how many times Carina denied it.
The two fell into a comfortable silence. Carina knew that Katniss liked the quiet sometimes, she barely had enough of it back home without her mother's haunted wails.
Katniss stayed still on Carina's shoulders, her eyes gently closing as if she was going to fall asleep. She opened her eyes to check on Prim and smiled, turning her head towards Carina.
In a small voice, she asked. "...What if you're not here, then? Who do I turn to?"
Taken aback, Carina let out a small laugh and shook her head. An odd question. One she'd never thought of.
"What do you mean? Where else would I be?"
"I don't know, I was just—"
"You should go to my grandfather."
"If he's not there."
Carina made a face before she said. "Roan." He was a little out there, a bit irresponsible but he had a good head on his shoulders during times when it mattered. "If he's not there then I guess I'm dead."
Katniss froze. Her brows furrowed and she peeled herself off Carina to look at her. Carina was smiling but Katniss was not. She lightly hit Carina's arm and said. "You really shouldn't joke about that."
"It's just a silly joke, Catnip."
But Katniss wasn't laughing. "It's not funny." She got up and changed the towel on Prim's head before feeding her a spoonful of warm honey lemon water that Carina's grandfather had made.
There was an odd tension that had snaked its way into the room. It hung off Katniss' shoulders like her father's hunting jacket as Carina pulled back from her, already regretting her joke.
"Katniss." Carina also got up, dusting her skirt off. "I didn't mean that. I was just joking."
"It's not funny." She repeated gruffly, turning her head away from her friend.
Guilt bubbled inside and Carina bit her lip. She really didn't mean it. That was just something she and Gale often joked about, she didn't think Katniss would take it so seriously. It was just a—
Oh.
Carina froze. She was so empty headed sometimes that maybe Roan was right and that she wasn't that smart when it came to people. She was awful at reading people. She'd forgotten that Katniss was still mourning her father.
She was mourning too but she didn't take his death so hard. She had her grandfather and her grandmother before she died not that long after her father. But her grandfather made sure she wouldn't miss her father or anyone else much.
Without him, she and Roan would be struggling even worse than Katniss and Prim.
Well, there was also great aunt Dottie, her grandma's sister but she didn't know if her grandpa wasn't there, if Dottie would've helped them. She seemed to have a soft spot for her grandpa.
"Look, I'm really sorry." Carina tried, kicking stupid self for being so thoughtless.
What was she even thinking?
Katniss didn't just lose her father, she lost her mother too.
It was nothing like Roan and her. Carina barely knew her mother, she died when she was too young enough to remember. Roan never knew her either. She was a stranger to them both.
The only people that mourned her were her father and grandfather, no one else. She couldn't understand Katniss' frustrations with her own mother. She practically never had a mother.
Katniss nodded along and stepped out of Carina's room. "Can you tell your grandfather I went to check on my mother?"
"You're going into the woods." Carina deciphered and Katniss nodded once, holding a finger to her lips. "I'd ask you to come help me forage but your grandfather—"
"He'd lose his mind if I left and there's also Prim."
"Thought you said, you could trust Roan."
"Roan's doing something right now that I don't even know." Carina said, raising her voice a little bit.
Prim flinched and her eyelids twitched, threatening to open. Carina gasped, apologizing under her breath and went over to Prim, gently rocking her back to sleep as Katniss stood behind her.
"I'm going then." Katniss said and slipped off Carina's borrowed sandals, trading them for the soft hunting boots she'd hidden away underneath a crate inside Carina's closet.
Carina tried to dissuade her. It was too dangerous. Yes, she was a little jealous that Katniss got to go into those woods when she hadn't been there in weeks but that was not why Carina was trying to stop her.
"Those Capitol folks—"
"Won't even see me." Katniss cut her off with a small smile, squeezing her shoulders and heading to the door. "Besides, I'll have Gale with me."
"And me." Roan chimed in, already dressed to go out into the woods with a satchel filled with old tools that definitely belonged to their grandfather.
Carina narrowed her eyes on Roan and let out a quiet gasp. "Is that my ax—"
"I'm borrowing it." He replied as if it was nothing. "We need a little bit more honey and I like the comb so I think I'll try to get a hive this time."
"What you're gonna get is bee stings." Carina retorted and shook her head, making a move to grab the ax but her brother was faster.
Roan was already out the door, the ax slung over his shoulder, his steps light and quick. Carina let out an exasperated sigh, only for Katniss to laugh as she watched the exchange with a mischievous smile tugging at the corners of her lips.
"Getting slow, Carin." Katniss teased, arms crossing over her chest.
Carina narrowed her eyes and glared at her playfully, but the corner of her mouth twitched in amusement. "I'm just saving my strength for when I have to drag your stubborn self back here after you get caught by a Peacekeeper."
Katniss let out a snort of laughter, but before she could retort, a firm hand shot out, catching Roan by the back of his shirt.
"Hey." Gale's low, steady voice rang out as he held Roan still. "Where do you think you're running off to?" Roan squirmed with a grin, but Gale kept his grip firm. He gave him a pointed look. "Behave." He warned with mock seriousness before releasing him.
Letting Roan dash off again, Gale made his way over to Carina. His sharp eyes softened slightly as he greeted her with a familiar warmth. Katniss's gaze lingered on Gale. Her lips parted slightly, almost as if she wanted to say something.
When Carina's eyes flicked over and caught her looking, Katniss quickly glanced away. Carina's brows knit slightly, but she dismissed it and turned her attention back to Gale.
"You coming with us?" Gale asked, hopeful.
Carina's lips pressed together, her smile faltering slightly. "I can't." She shook her head. "Someone needs to look after Prim. Besides…I don't even know where my grandfather ran off to."
Gale's shoulders slumped slightly; he quickly masked it with a huff. "You never come to the woods anymore." His tone was teasing but Carina caught the underlying frustration.
She was frustrated too, she just couldn't do anything about it. She didn't want to disappoint her grandfather.
Feigning nonchalance, she said as she lightly poked his arm. "Don't pout."
His jaw clenched slightly, the corner of his mouth twitching upward, though the glint in his eyes revealed his mild annoyance.
"I'm not pouting."
She shot him a playful, knowing look. Gale exhaled sharply, giving in. With a reluctant half-smile, he tilted his head and fixed her with a look.
"When those Capitol folks finally leave, you'll come with me." It wasn't a question—it was a demand.
"You sure about that?"
"Promise me." Carina tilted her head to the side, ready to complain but Gale knew her better. He gave her a look and she sighed.
"Fine." She said, though she sounded tired, she couldn't hide the smile on her face. "But you do know that my grandpa don't want me or Roan in the woods. And if he had his way, you and Katniss would also stay out of those woods."
"Grandpa won't know." Roan's voice called out smugly from where he lingered in the yard, clearly eavesdropping. He swung the ax over his shoulder, flashing a toothy grin.
Katniss snorted, but then cocked her head. "What about Dottie's shop?"
Gale, not missing a beat, cut in smoothly. "You get a few days off, don't you?"
Carina rolled her eyes with a half-groan. "Oh, for the love of—" She waved them both off, turning back toward the house. "Just go already."
A voice, sickly sweet and off-pitch, drifted from behind them. "Where are you all going? Off to play a game? Can we join?"
Carina's shoulders stiffened. The smile slipped from her face as she turned, only to see two masked figures standing at the edge of the yard.
The Walston siblings.
Two stood in their front yard, dressed in matching thick black coats though it was quite a warm fall afternoon. Their oddly matching white porcelain mask caught the light, making the hollow eye holes look almost black.
Galeria stood just behind her brother, her mask tilted at an unnatural angle, as if she were studying them through it.
Carina pulled at her own light sweater and took a careful step back, Gale's hand unconsciously grabbed her wrist. He stood in front of her protectively as Galeria took a step forward, stepping on her own shadow.
"Can we join you?" She asked with that awful melodic Capitol accent.
Gale's jaw tightened. Katniss, who had been leaning lazily against the doorframe, straightened slightly, her hand shifting closer to the handle. Carina's throat tightened.
"Did you hear us?" Atticus pressed, his voice lilting upward with mock politeness. "We asked if we can join you."
"Think you two have the wrong house." Gale took a step forward, voice low and steady. "The mayor's house is all the way there so I think you should go over—"
"Oh, we know where we are. This is the Semor house, was it not?" Atticus cut him off sharply.
Gale's smile fell. He and Carina shared a look as the two pursed their lips. Carina studied the two doll-like siblings in front of her, their eyes glassy as the mask they wore.
A shiver went down her spine. It was haunting how she couldn't see a thing behind those masks.
Were those two even real people?
Maybe they were a set of Capitol's creations. That seemed like a sound reasoning. Those two and their eccentric father seemed too strange even for Capitol people.
She cleared her throat as she stepped out of Gale's shadow. He made an attempt to grab her and pull her back but he only managed to hook his hand around her wrist, failing to pull her back to him. She couldn't hide behind Gale forever.
"You're right. This is…" She swallowed and avoided their hollow gaze. "...the Semor House. My grandpa—grandfather isn't around so I ask that you two leave."
Atticus snorted and shook his head. There was a quiet clink as he moved which did nothing to ease her ominous feelings towards those two strange siblings.
The masked boy took a calculated step forward, avoiding to stand in front of Gale or in the sight of Katniss and landed in front of Roan. "I don't believe we asked you that." He said.
Roan raised his brow as he and Gale shared a look. Carina noticed those looks immediately, she had to step in again before those two even got a chance to speak.
"Apologies but I said it out of concern for you two." She replied, slipping her hand into Gale's. "There's really nothing left for you two to do here."
"We're bored." Atticus declared.
"Well, I'm sure you'll find something to entertain yourself at the mayor's."
Galeria giggled harshly like Carina had said something funny. Carina's ears heated up and turned a slight shade pink, she didn't like that girl at all.
Like her brother, she took a calculated step forward, swaying as she did so. "We heard you all, you're going to go out somewhere to play." Her strange melodic voice grated on. "We went to join you." She tilted her to the side like someone would if they were smiling and pleading.
But there were no lips or eyes to be seen on her face, just a porcelain mouth and hollow eyes. She only looked more out of place and unnerving.
Roan grinded his teeth but held himself back. Katniss slinked into the shadows and looked to Carina for guidance while Gale was a single step away from ripping into those two.
Her head throbbed lightly and she shut her eyes. She really hoped she didn't catch Prim's sickness. She, of all people, couldn't afford to be sick. She had so much to do and if she got sick then Gale would catch whatever she managed to get—it had always been like that.
"...Please." Galeria added like an afterthought.
"Gally." Atticus clicked his tongue and shook his head. "We want to play."
"Yes and being a little…nice goes a long way, Attie." Galeria said to her brother.
"They're going to run some errands." Carina lied and Atticus tilted his head to the side.
The sunlight cast ominous shadows on their faces and Carina bit the inside of her cheek to hold back a reaction. The boy was watching her with his hollow eyes while making slow and quick movements.
"Lies." He said loudly, almost yelling.
Roan jumped where he stood and looked around but there was no one there. The Semors were fortunate that their house was on the near edge of the district, the closest the merchant side but far enough that no one would venture out there unless they had a reason to.
"You're lying. Why are you lying?" He kept saying like a siren.
Carina bit down harder. The burst of pain hid her shame and suppressed her fear well enough; still she couldn't help the painful pounding in her chest. Gale squeezed her hand and slipped out of her shadow but she held him back, knowing he was a firecracker and those two gunpowder.
"She's not lying." Gale still managed to get out, much to Carina's dismay.
Atticus' head snapped towards Gale and he stumbled back a little. "I didn't ask you. I asked her," He pointed with his gloved finger at a graying Carina. "I asked Mr Semor's granddaughter, not you. We want to join in. We want to play with you. Stop lying."
"Attie." Galeria chastised with a graceful laugh that sounded a lot like a broken melody. "You're acting like a child." She said like she wasn't a complete menace in her short visit to great aunt Dottie's store.
It was clear to her now but Carina could say it to herself and maybe Gale that she was terribly afraid of them, their hollow gaze and the masks they wore. Their spoiled behavior was the least of her concerns, it was those damned masks that got to her.
Roan let out a sharp breath through his nose, clearly fed up. "We're going to the mines." His voice was blunt, a little strained and forced like he'd given up.
His words made Carina's headache grow slightly but she forced her expression to remain neutral. Beside her, Katniss barely flinched. Though Carina caught the brief glance she shot toward the house.
Katniss was worried about Prim.
Atticus' head tilted slightly. "To play?" He asked, almost mockingly.
"Sure, why not." Roan shrugged with a deliberate nonchalance. His lips twitched with the ghost of a smirk that only those four caught on while the Walston siblings didn't even pay his face any mine.
But Gale caught on quickly and played along against Carina's wishes. "Yeah, it's a good spot. Big enough to run around, plenty of room to play."
Carina's stomach twisted but she didn't speak. She willed herself to stay calm, even as her hands grew clammy. Katniss' gaze flitted back toward the house again, her steps barely perceptible as she slowly inched toward the doorway.
Galeria's head swayed, happy and almost fascinated by the idea. "Is your sister going to join you?" She asked sweetly, her porcelain face unreadable.
Before Carina could answer, Roan cut in smoothly. "Oh, later. That's when it's the best time." He answered with an easy grin. "You know, when the sun falls. The mines light up and it's easier to play. You'll want to see it then."
Galeria's head cocked slightly. "The mines light up?"
Atticus' mask turned toward Roan, his hollow eyes locked on him. "We'll come too." He said firmly.
Carina's throat dried. She took a careful breath. "Would your father even allow you to go?" She asked as politely as she could. "You know, I don't imagine Director Walston would be very happy if he found out or Serval."
Galeria's fingers twitched at the mention of their father and his young assistant. For a moment, Carina thought she saw dark clouds hanging over her head as she hesitated. "He…he didn't give us permission to go down to the mines." She murmured disappointedly. "We should ask."
Atticus' head snapped toward her, his voice sharp. "Gally—"
But she was already turning, her delicate shoes crunching lightly against the dirt. "We'll ask."
Atticus stared at her for a long moment, his mask unreadable. Then, with a stiff nod, he followed her.
Carina let out a quiet breath as they walked off, her grip on Gale's hand loosening slightly. But the knot in her stomach didn't untangle. She stared after them, feeling her heart thudding uncomfortably in her chest.
As soon as they were out of sight, Carina whipped around, yanking her hand free from Gale's. "Are you out of your mind?" she hissed, rounding on both him and Roan. "The mines? Really?"
Roan shrugged, unbothered. "They won't actually go. They're not that dumb."
Gale folded his arms, his jaw set. "And if they are?"
"Then they deserve it." Roan's voice was flat, his eyes hard.
Carina glared at him. "You don't mean that."
He didn't answer. He just turned away, his shoulders stiff.
Katniss, who had remained quiet, finally spoke. "We should go. Prim's still sick. We can't stay out too long."
Katniss glanced back toward the house, her eyes narrowing slightly. Carina caught the look but didn't comment, simply watching as Katniss moved swiftly to follow Roan.
Gale nodded, but before he left, he turned back to Carina. His hand slipped into his pocket, and he pressed something into her palm—candied violets, sweet and delicate made with the honey her grandfather had given Hazelle wrapped in paper.
His fingers lingered over hers for a brief second longer than they needed to. She looked up at him with wide eyes in protest.
Then Roan called for him before she had a chance to tell him off that she didn't need him to keep giving her sweets when he could barely afford any for himself or siblings. He'd run off after them, leaving Carina alone with the candy in her hand and the echo of his touch lingering on her skin.
Her grandfather returned not long after. He muttered that he'd been called away to check on the equipment again. His sharp eyes scanned the yard and the tree line.
"Where are Roan and Katniss?" He asked with his hands on his hips. A trace of soot and coal dust on his fingers and collars.
Carina stared at him hard. He'd been to the mines again even when wasn't scheduled to work. She pursed her lips and swallowed up the words that threatened to spill out of her month and instead said. "Out."
"Out?" He raised a brow and leaned close to his granddaughter.
Carina wiped her clammy palms on her skirt and forced a casual smile. "They went back to the Everdeen house to check on Mrs Everdeen." She lied smoothly. Then she held up the candy in her hand. "Gale came by too. He dropped this off."
Her grandfather's eyes softened slightly. "Honeyed violets?" he hummed under his breath, a knowing smile tugging at his lips.
"Want one?"
"Those are for you, Carin."
"You know I don't mind sharing."
"Oh, that poor thing." Her grandfather mumbled, shaking his head in false disappointment. "You really don't get Gale, do you Carin?" Carina cocked her head to the side and her grandfather chuckled to himself before ruffling her hair. "Don't share that one with Roan—Gale gave it to you and no one else—did he give one to Katniss?"
Carina shook her head. "I don't think he did."
"Then I hope you enjoy them before Roan comes back home." He turned away and went inside to check on Prim.
Carina slipped a piece into her mouth. It was sweet. Almost too sweet. Her face turned pink, but she smiled softly as she retreated to a small corner in the living room by the fire. She picked up her unfinished sweater and quietly knitted by the fire as the sun began to set with the honeyed violets by her side.
When the sun had set and the violets had finished, she'd only noticed that the sweater was also done. With a sigh, she got up and made her way to check on her grandfather and Prim.
Her grandfather was lightly asleep on a rocking chair near Prim's bed. His head lolled slightly, and his hands were loosely clasped over his stomach. The soft rise and fall of Prim's breathing was the only sound in the room.
Her grandfather stirred awake when Carina came in. He blinked groggily and rubbed his eyes. "Are Roan and Katniss back yet?"
Carina shook her head. "No," She said softly. "I'm going to prepare dinner."
Before she could head to the kitchen, she heard the door creak open. Katniss stepped inside, dirt on her boots and wind in her hair. Roan was right behind her, a faint grin tugging at the corners of his lips.
Carina greeted them at the door with her arms crossed. "You're late." She said dryly.
Katniss gave a small, tired smile. "I managed to find some rabbits. Took a little longer than I thought."
Mr. Semor appeared from Carina's room, his sharp eyes instantly clocking the dirt on their clothes and the faint scratches on Roan's hands. He knew.
Without a word, he stared at them for a moment. Then, he simply told them to freshen up before turning his attention to Gale, who had just walked in behind them.
Once Roan and Katniss had disappeared into the other room, Mr. Semor's gaze settled firmly on Gale. His voice was quiet but pointed. "I'm going to say this again, Gale. Don't go beyond the fence." His tone was firm but not unkind. "You're the oldest with Carin. It's time you remember that."
Gale's jaw clenched slightly. His hands curled into loose fists at his sides. "I don't have a choice."
Her grandfather's face softened slightly. He studied Gale for a moment, then sighed. "I know," He said, quieter now. "But I worry about you. About Carin. She follows you, you know and if anything were to happen to you..."
Gale's eyes flickered with a mix of frustration and guilt but Carina's grandfather didn't press further. Instead, he offered a small, weary smile. "Come have dinner with us."
"Can't. My mother wanted us home tonight."
Her grandfather nodded in understanding. Without another word, he headed into the kitchen to see what Katniss had brought and began preparing dinner.
Gale stood there for a moment, his eyes on Carina. She turned her back to him and went back to her corner. Before returning to him and handing him the sweater she had been knitting. The wool was soft and sturdy despite it coming from great aunt Dottie's scrap wool.
"For the violets." She said, knowing the sweater was a greater gift than those candied violets.
Gale blinked in surprise before taking the sweater in his hands. He let out a laugh in disbelief, unfurling the sweater and holding it up to the light. He couldn't believe his eyes.
After a moment, he pulled her into a hug, taking her by surprise. He held her tightly as she buried her face into his chest. "I can't accept this." He murmured against her hair. "The violets were nothing compared to this."
Carina pulled back slightly, her brows knitting together. "Y'know you've been wearing the same old sweater since we were nine." She pointed out softly, brushing her fingers over the worn fabric of his sleeve.
"It's a good sweater." He said, still holding tightly to the sweater she made with one hand while the other was wrapped around her waist.
"It has enough holes in it for the rabbits to burrow for the winter, Gale."
He snorted and buried his head in the crook of her neck. His warm breath tickled her and she elbowed him, only to make him laugh harder.
He only pulled back to make a single protest. "You know my mother was going to fix up my father's sweaters for me."
Carina's eyes darkened slightly and her lips pressed into a firm line.
Seeing her upset, he exhaled sharply and gave in, reluctantly accepting the gift. "Fine, I'll take this but I'm giving you something back in exchange. It'll be even better than a sweater."
"I'm sure it will." She said with a smile, rolling her eyes.
Carina's smile softened, but before Gale could turn to leave, she lowered her gaze slightly, feeling the heat return to her cheeks. "Thanks…for the candied violets," She mumbled, her voice barely above a whisper.
Gale's eyes brightened. His grin widened slightly, catching the pink in her cheeks. "Did you finish them all?" he asked, tilting his head playfully.
Carina, still a little flustered, nodded. "I did," She admitted softly.
His smile grew warmer. Without hesitation, he asked. "Can I hug you?"
Carina blinked, momentarily confused by the sudden request. "You already did."
"Can I do it again?" She narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "I promise I'm not up to something."
Lightly, she punched him and said. "You better not put something like a lizard or a spider in my sweater."
Gale laughed and she nodded, taking a step further and before she could fully register it, he pulled her into another hug. This one was gentler, warmer and lingered a little longer. She rested her cheek against his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart.
When he finally pulled back, he gave her a small, lingering smile. "I'll see you tomorrow." He promised before turning and heading out the door.
Carina stood by the door, watching him leave. The cool evening air slipped in but she barely noticed. Her eyes remained on him until he disappeared down the path.
"I think Gale likes you."
She startled slightly and turned to see Roan leaning against the doorway, a smug grin plastered across his face.
She frowned and brushed past him to gather her knitting needles and yarn, tossing them into a canvas bag. "We're friends, of course he likes me. I like him too even if he is the most annoying boy in our district."
Roan snorted. "That's not what I meant."
She rolled her eyes and threw a pillow nearby. He caught it with ease and threw it back at her, the pillow landed perfectly in the armchair she'd been sitting in through the afternoon. She glared at her brother who laughed at her and made a move to grab another pillow, putting down the sack he'd dragged in earlier that morning.
Her brow furrowed. "You're still carrying that around?" She asked, eyeing it curiously. "What is it this time?"
Roan shifted the sack slightly, his smirk faltering. "It's not weeds," he muttered. "It's herbs. Medicinal plants."
"Where did you get those?" Carina's brow furrowed further.
"I sto—burrowed them."
"From who, Roan?"
Roan shrugged. "Don't worry about it, they won't even miss it. I saw they had a lot of these."
"Do you even know anything about herbs?" She asked, her voice laced with confusion.
Roan gave her a pointed look, clearly unwilling to explain further. "I know enough that this helps with colds and fevers—I heard the healer's son say that."
Before she could press him, he turned and walked toward the back of the house. "I'll be in the back, sorting out the comb and honey. I need honey for the medicine. Grandpa's busy in the kitchen and I don't want him breathing down my neck."
Roan went out the back door and she let out a tired sigh, her body shaking with the tiredness. It was the second day of Prim's sickness and the fever showed no signs of coming down. Katniss and her had stayed the night along with Gale and his siblings before at the insistence of Carina's grandfather while Mrs Hawthorne had kept Mrs Everdeen company.
With a light stretch, she cleared the living room and tossed a few logs into the fire before setting the table for five. Even if Prim was sick, it wouldn't hurt to set an extra seat at the table. Then she locked the front door and went to check on her grandfather.
In the kitchen, her grandfather stood by the stove. There was a small pile of carrots and potatoes in the sink bowl. Her grandfather stirred the simmering pot and barely glanced up to look at her.
"Oh, good you're here. I take it Gale went home." Carina nodded. "Good timing too, haven't finished peeling the carrots and potatoes." He said and craned his neck forward to look out the window at the sky. "Think there's a storm rolling in. I'm gonna need to finish the stew soon. I was going to save some for their mother but with this weather…"
"Do you think she'll be fine alone in this weather?"
Her grandfather shook his head. "Of course not. I'm going to try and bring her over. I'd ask Dottie but…" He trailed off, already knowing the answer. "Hazelle can't stay another night at the Everdeen house either, her little one's not good with storms and Gale can only do so much. It's not fair for her either." He sighed. "I could ask the mayor's wife." He mumbled under his breath but seemed to brush the idea off. "I'll go check on Katniss, think Gale left the medicine he and Katniss traded with her."
"I'll stay here, I guess."
"Make sure to stir the pot every few minutes, I don't want the stock to stick to the sides. That's wasted food and we can't afford that." He said and made his way to Carina's room.
She took a knife and began peeling the vegetables. Her mind drifted to the Walston siblings and their earlier visit. She felt a twinge of worry at the thought of them possibly going down into the mines. She couldn't help but think that Gale and Roan had made a mistake.
When she was done peeling, she roughly chopped the vegetables and tossed them into a bowl before stirring the stock like her grandfather had told her to. She checked the pantry and found some stale bread.
With a sigh, she soaked it in water, then tossed it in the oven for a while to soften it. Then she turned back to the window and she froze. For a split second, she thought she saw something—a flicker of movement but when she lept towards the window and pressed herself against the counter to check; it was gone.
Instead, the sky crackled with distant thunder. Her stomach tightened.
"Roan!" She quickly called out to Roan, her voice carrying through the house. "Get back inside! It's going to rain!"
Roan groaned but dragged himself back inside, carrying a jar of medicinal herbs and only two jars of honey. His hair was damp from the drizzle that had started to fall.
"Managed to get eight jars out of what I found in the woods." He said, holding the jars up triumphantly. "Put the rest in the shed."
Carina arched her brow but didn't comment. Instead, she pointed to the kitchen. "Stay in here and put away the honey."
He scowled. "I need to finish the medicine. It has to boil."
"Use the stove." She said firmly, already turning away. She made her way to Prim's room to let Katniss and her grandfather know about the weather.
"Grandpa!" She called out, keeping her voice level. "The weather's getting worse."
Her grandfather turned to look at her and placed a single finger on his lips. Prim was still fast asleep, still and almost lifeless.
Her face scrunched into a feverish frown. By her side was Katniss, still dressed in her hunting jacket and boots with a single rabbit tied to her waist. She hastily untied it and propped it on the floor with a quick apology to the Semors.
"I can help skin and prep the rabbit, I just need a little time—" Katniss began and Carina's grandfather cut her off.
"Carin can do it, you should take a bath and head to the table." He said, patting her shoulder in comfort. "I've already heated the water and set it aside for you—you can come back while Roan keeps watch—Roan!" He yelled out to his grandson.
"The medicine." Katniss mumbled out and took out a small pouch from the insides of her jacket and passed it to Carina's grandfather. "This should be enough, right?"
Both Semors in the room said nothing but Carina offered a small comforting smile. Her grandfather turned the pouch in his hands though he had a frown on his face as he measured the weight of it in his hands.
"You should stay another night." He said to Katniss.
"My mother—"
"I'll bring her here. We have a spare room."
Katniss didn't even have the energy to argue and she simply nodded. He signaled to Carina to follow him and she followed him obediently into the kitchen. He stopped in the center of the kitchen, circling around for a moment before stopping by the stove to stir the pot.
There was another pot on the stove with herbs simmering lightly. She could smell notes of honey and lemon along with other earthy scents. Roan's concoction. But he was nowhere to be found. She could hear his voice travel lightly from her room, she picked up pieces of his conversation with Katniss as she dragged herself out of Carina's room and into the shared bathroom.
Carina threw down the rabbit Katniss had brought and butchered it over the sink, carefully dividing it into pieces. She placed two portions of it away, tying them up with twine before wrapping them up in paper and slipping it into their refrigerator. They used it almost like an extra cabinet since power in Twelve was a luxury. The fridge was practically useless, just another piece of furniture.
"The little one's not gonna make it through the night at this rate." Her grandfather said grimly, voice barely above a whisper. He had his hands on his hips as glanced over at the hall that led to her and Roan's bedroom. He shook his head.
"You shouldn't say that." Carina clicked her tongue and lightly peppered the chunks of rabbit before tossing them into the boiling pot. "Dinner should be done soon. I found some bread to go along with the stew so that should be enough, right?"
"Carin…" He shook his head. That grim look didn't leave his face at all. "Look, I appreciate you trying to look on the bright side but I need you to be realistic…like me."
"Prim will be fine."
"She really won't. She needs medicine or some sorta treatment."
"Katniss got her some." Her grandfather shook his head. "And she's looking after Prim, she'll be right as rain by sunrise."
"Or she'll be gone by then." Chimed in Roan. He trudged into the kitchen and checked on his concoction.
"Roan!" Carina and her grandfather hissed out at the same time and Roan looked away, pretending to stir the pot. "That's not the right thing to say." Their grandfather said and Roan shrugged.
"You were thinking about it, anyway."
Their grandfather pressed the bridge of his nose between his fingers and let out a sigh. "I'm saying that because the medicine Katniss got might not be the right one. Prim needs to see a healer."
Carina nodded and craned her head to look out the window. "The weather's getting pretty bad."
Their grandfather let out a heavy breath. "I'll bring Mrs Everdeen here. She'll know what to do, she's their mother and even in her current state—I'm sure she's got some sense in her to help her youngest." He said, grabbing his coat. "Roan, keep an eye on Prim. Carin, finish the dinner and set the table."
With that, he left, pulling the door closed behind him. Carina and Roan exchanged a glance before silently splitting up. Roan headed for the back door to check the locks while locking all the windows in the house.
Carina remained by the stove, diligently stirring the pot and glancing at Roan's concoction to ensure it didn't boil over.
A knock suddenly echoed from the front door, breaking the quiet. Carina's head snapped up, expecting her grandfather. But when she opened the door, she blinked in surprise.
Serval.
"Evening." He greeted smoothly with a small smile. "Is your grandfather around?"
Carina hesitated but kept her voice steady. "He's out."
He nodded, his eyes drifting toward the side of their house. "I noticed some of the plants in your garden. I couldn't help but take a look—what are they?"
Frowning slightly, Carina stepped onto the porch and followed him. Her eyes narrowed at the patch of root vegetables he gestured toward and then the lemon tree.
She forced a casual shrug. "Not sure. I know that one is the lemon tree my grandparents planted. The rest…my grandmother planted those. She and my grandpa used to run a makeup and perfume store before I was born."
"Yeah? What happened to it?"
"It shut down a long time ago," Carina answered simply. "No one can afford that kind of stuff anymore."
"Shame." Serval's tone was falsely sympathetic. "You still take orders?"
"No." She said honestly, hoping he'd get the message and leave. "Shop's been boarded up for a while."
He smiled faintly, as if buying her excuse. "Too bad." His eyes lingered on her a little too long. "Where's your grandfather, exactly?"
"Out." She repeated but her attention flicked toward the window where Roan's face appeared briefly.
Serval caught the movement too. He chuckled. "Your brother doesn't like me much."
Carina forced a polite smile. "He's just careful around strangers."
The wind howled as another crack of lightning illuminated the sky. Carina's fingers twitched at her sides, but she forced herself to stand her ground.
Serval watched her carefully, that faint smile never quite fading. He took a half step closer, lowering his voice slightly. "You're really not curious why I'm here?"
"I'm not a very curious girl."
He chuckled, shaking his head. "That so? You don't even want to know why the Walston kids suddenly got it in their heads to play in the mines?"
Her stomach tightened. She exhaled slowly, controlling her reaction. "They wanted to follow us on some errands. Not our fault. We tried to tell them we weren't playing games, but Atticus and Galeria thought we were lying."
"And were you?" Serval tilted his head, mismatched eyes gleaming in the dim light of the moon.
She blinked and shook her head. "No." She denied. "The food on our tables doesn't appear out of nowhere, Serval. Someone's gotta go get 'em and it just so happened that those two caught my brother and my friends on their way to an errand. It's not our fault."
"Didn't say it was." Serval's eyes glimmered with false understanding. "Director Walston spoils those too much—I would know, I have to deal with them."
Lightning split the sky again, and the wind carried the scent of rain. Serval looked up at the darkening clouds before turning back to her.
"Now they've got it in their heads that there's something fun to look at down in the mines."
Carina frowned. "Why are you telling me this?"
His smile deepened. "Consider it a warning. Those two are going to be a handful. You might want to be careful next time you come across those two again."
"I appreciate the warning and I'll make sure those two don't wander off if I see them around." She said and tried to run back inside but he wouldn't let the conversation die.
"Of course." His gaze lingered, drifting over her face. "But you're not going to invite me in? The weather's awful."
"It's late."
He hummed, glancing past her toward the window. "You have friends over?"
Carina stiffened. "What?"
His smirk widened slightly. "Gale."
She nodded, her eyes darting over to the window where her brother's face had vanished. "It's late for me to have friends over."
"Is it just you and your brother, then?" Serval leaned against the porch railing like he wasn't there uninvited—she didn't like that, she had the urge to push him off those rails that her grandfather had put in and wipe the traces of Serval clean.
He didn't seem to sense her unease and carried on. "That's dangerous, you know. Your house is a little too far from the rest of the district."
He took a slow step closer. Carina instinctively shifted back, her breath catching as his gaze locked onto hers. He didn't just look at her—he studied her, his mismatched eyes glinting with something unreadable. The way his gaze lingered on hers sent a chill down her spine.
"You have interesting eyes," he murmured, tilting his head. "The way the black seeps into the brown… It's striking."
"Yours are more striking. Blue in one eye and black in another—I think I've only seen dogs and cats with eyes like that." Carina bit back through clenched teeth and watched him hold back his fury over the insult. "I should go inside."
But he didn't move. Instead, he reached up, fingers lifting toward her face. Her skin crawled, and she stepped back sharply, barely stopping herself from flinching outright.
Serval's smile didn't falter, but his hand stilled midair before he slowly lowered it. "Relax," He said smoothly, "just curious."
She pushed him back and glared at him, dropping all pretenses of being polite. Her grandfather's words be damned, Serval was crossing the line. "Well, too much curiosity isn't a good thing mister."
"Mister?" He echoed incredulously and combed his fingers through his hair. "I'm only five years older than you."
She turned away from him, almost hurrying towards the flickering light spilling out of the front door. She refused to stay one more minute with Serval.
"You should come back later when my grandfather's here." She said and stopped at the door, only to jump back.
Serval was right there behind her.
Lightning cracked again and draped him in its fleeting light, scaring her. She bit her bottom lip to suppress a scream and alarming Katniss and Roan inside. The last thing she wanted was for him to see either of them.
Seeing her face, he laughed and she narrowed her eyes. As much as she didn't like the Walstons siblings, she hated Serval more. His smug face and the way he carried himself like he knew everything about everyone, he hated it.
She watched him carefully from the safety of the entrance, refusing to cross the threshold again. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small wrapped square. "Here."
She frowned at the unfamiliar packaging. "What is it?"
"Chocolate." His grin returned. "It's…sweet and soft." He held up the silvery bar in the air. "I figured you might never have had it, but it's good. It's my way of thanking you for putting up with those spoiled Walstons and my uninvited visit."
"So you know you're uninvited?" She said to herself but he heard like she wanted him to.
He chuckled. "I like you. You've got some nerve—more than that grandfather of yours."
"The feeling's not mutual." She fired back without a care. Even if she was afraid of him being from the Capitol, he was getting on her nerves and like Roan, she didn't have a lot of patience. "I don't know you and I hope you don't come around anymore."
Though, she'd regret the words spilling out of her mouth in the morning after but they needed to be said. Serval and the Walstons, even if they were from the Capitol, were pushing her and her family around.
She didn't like how her grandfather had to drag himself out of his bed and go back down to those mines that took her father. She didn't like the spoiled brats who thought she and Roan were their playthings and she despised Serval for thinking he was above them all. And she hated the way he studied everyone around him and the way he said Gale's name.
She hated him.
Serval watched her for a long moment before extending the chocolate again. "Take it."
"No
"Why not?"
"I don't like sweet things." She lied. She just didn't want a thing from him or anyone from the Capitol.
He arched a brow, amused. "You've never even tried it." He said and tried to hand the bar to her.
He grabbed her wrist and placed it in her hand, closing her fingers over it. His gloved hands were too cold. The leather dragged against finger and she felt a shiver go down her spine before she tossed him the bar back. He caught it with ease and looked displeased.
She met his gaze, her voice sharp. "I'll be fine never trying it."
Instead of looking offended, he smirked. "Fine." He reached into his pocket again, this time pulling out a few crisp bills. "How about this instead?"
Her eyes narrowed in disgust. "Get out."
With a sarcastic bow, he turned around and disappeared into the night. Lightning struck again as the wind howled. Carina took backward steps before she slammed the door.
The lock clicked into place but the tension in Carina's shoulders didn't ease. If anything, it coiled tighter, like a rope pulled too taut. She turned on her heel, pulse hammering. She still felt his gaze on her, that knowing smirk curling at the edges of his mouth, the way his mismatched eyes had pinned her in place like a moth under glass.
"Who was that?"
Carina jerked her head up to see Katniss standing a few feet away, her damp hair clinging to her shoulders, brows knit in concern.
"No one." The answer came too quick, too sharp.
She pushed past her, barely aware of the way her own hands were trembling. Serval was gone, but he had left something behind, something she couldn't shake. The way he had looked at her. The way he had gotten too close. The sick feeling in her gut churned stronger.
Katniss wasn't convinced. "Carin—"
She ignored her, heading straight for the kitchen.
She needed to wash her hands. Needed to get rid of that crawling sensation Serval had left behind when he'd touched her. The cold leather of his gloves, the press of his fingers against her wrist—it made her skin feel wrong, like she'd been marked somehow.
The moment she reached the sink, she turned the faucet on full blast, thrusting her hands under the icy water. She scrubbed them roughly, her nails scraping against her palms, the sting barely registering.
"Carin?" Roan's voice cut through the rush of water.
She didn't turn but she felt him lingering in the doorway, felt his sharp gaze flick over her hunched shoulders, over the way her fingers were turning red under the relentless scrubbing.
"What happened?"
The words scraped at her. Her grip on the soap tightened, her knuckles going white. How was she supposed to explain that nothing had happened—nothing she could point to, nothing Serval had actually done—but that she still felt like she had to claw her way out of her own skin?
Katniss stepped closer, voice gentler now. "Are you okay?"
Carina forced herself to still and straightened her back. She dried her hands with sharp, jerking movements, ignoring how raw they felt.
"I'm fine."
Roan didn't look convinced. His arms crossed tightly over his chest, the way they always did when he was trying to rein in his temper. "Who was that?"
Carina exhaled sharply, finally turning to face them. "That Capitol Director—Director Walston's assistant, Serval." Her eyes found Roan's, her words pointed. "And he asked about the mines."
Roan scoffed. "Of course he did."
"Because you and Gale talked about it—you two made it seem like it was a playground to those two…brats." She vomited out, her chest heaving with burning pain. "What were you thinking, Roan?"
"Keep it down." Katniss' said with a quiet sigh. "Prim's still sleeping."
Carina swallowed the lump in her throat, but the anger in her chest refused to settle. Her fingers twitched at her sides, itching to scrub her hands again.
Katniss glanced between them, still wary. "Did they go down there?"
Carina shook her head. "No. Serval came to warn us."
Roan let out a sharp breath, his arms still crossed over his chest. "Then they're idiots if they try. If they go down there thinking it's some game, that's on them. Not on me. Not on Gale."
Carina's jaw clenched but she said nothing.
Katniss exhaled. "He's right." She said and crossed her arms, water dripping down her head as she moved, leaving damp spots on her borrowed blouse. "And it's not really our job to look after them—it's their father's or that assistant of his that came to bother you this time of the night."
Carina's stomach twisted. She didn't want to admit it but she knew they weren't wrong. It wasn't their job to look after those two. Still, she couldn't help but feel a gnawing sense of fear. She was afraid that those two would follow through and step into the mines.
Then something would go wrong and somehow, she would blame herself.
"Still," Katniss went on. "you should've called us. You didn't have to deal with that man alone."
"He's nineteen." Carina corrected. "We're not that far apart in age. Only five years." She echoed back to his words and stopped herself.
Katniss frowned. "Why does that matter?"
Carina wished she hadn't said it.
The moment the words left her mouth, she could feel Katniss latching onto them, the gears turning in her head. She knew that look—sharp, calculating, like a hunter sizing up her prey. Carina's skin prickled with unease under her gaze.
"Did he say something to you?" Katniss asked carefully.
Carina kept her hands moving, grabbing a cloth to dry them off, pretending not to hear. "I didn't want him to see you." She said instead, ignoring Katniss' question.
That made Katniss pause. Her arms tightened around herself, the damp fabric of her blouse clinging to her skin. "Why? What would he have done."
Carina exhaled slowly through her nose. She didn't want to talk about this. Didn't want to think about it. But the words spilled out before she could stop them. "He was snooping around our garden."
She expected Katniss to say something or react but her eyes wandered out the window, confused and in search of something. While Roan stiffened. His whole body went rigid, like a coiled spring ready to snap.
"What?" He breathed out as the color drained from his face. He was already turning away and moving towards the backdoor, about to run the shed.
Quickly, Carina grabbed his arm and held him there in the kitchen. "But I handled it."
She could feel Katniss staring at her, feeling the weight of her growing unease pressing against the space between them. "What do you mean you handled it?" She asked, voice laced with something close to frustration.
Carina squared her shoulders. "It means I handled it."
But the way Katniss and Roan looked at her made her feel exposed, like they could see straight through the cracks she was trying to hold together.
"No, you didn't."
Carina clenched her jaw, willing herself to stay still and masking her thoughts. "Look, I'm older than both of you," She steeled her voice and kept her face blank, pushing down the waves of fear and loathing. "I know what I'm doing."
But did she?
The second the words left her mouth, they felt brittle, like they might crumble if Katniss or Roan pressed any harder. A poor shield against the truth gnawing at the edges of her thoughts—that she didn't know what she was doing, that she'd let Serval get too close, that she still felt his presence lingering on her skin like a stain she couldn't scrub off.
She wasn't her grandfather or great aunt Dottie. She was still young and didn't know but she had to keep Roan safe. Serval wasn't safe. She had to keep Katniss and Prim safe.
But Katniss didn't look convinced. Her lips parted like she wanted to argue but Carina moved before she could. She grabbed a towel and tossed it at Katniss, forcing a smile and said. "Dry your hair or you'll catch a cold."
Katniss caught it without thinking, blinking at her like she wasn't sure whether to be annoyed or worried. Carina didn't give her the chance to decide.
She turned her back on them both, heading for the table, her fingers curling around the plates and bowls with a little too much force. She set them down carefully and slowly, almost fussing over the placements—it was the only thing she could control.
Maybe if she kept her hands busy, she wouldn't have to think about the way Serval had looked at her.
Maybe if she didn't stop moving, she could pretend she wasn't still shaking.