Disclaimer: I don't own anything that doesn't belong to me.
Arven and Crispin glared at each other hatefully in the Savanna biome, Nemona, Kieran, the rest of the BB Elite Four, and several students and local Pokémon watching from the sidelines.
"So," Crispin said with a coldness they didn't match his hair color or type specialty, a Magmortar standing at his side. "I see you decided to take me on first. Couldn't wait to challenge me, could you?"
"No," Arven said, crossing his arms, a diffident look in his eyes, Mabosstiff loyally beside him. "It just so happens that you're the weakest of the BB Elite Four, so I thought I'd do Nemona a favor and take you on so she doesn't need to waste her time and energy on the likes of you."
There were quite a lot of gasps and excited shouts from the bystanders. "THAT WAS A SICK BURN, BEEP BOOP," Amarys exclaimed.
"Woo! Go, Arven!" Nemona cheered.
Crispin didn't react beyond a slight crease forming between his eyebrows, which told Arven he'd struck a critical hit. "Let's see if you can back up those words, rival. I've been waiting for a fiery challenger like you." He swung his frying pan through the air. "I should warn you, though – my trial is no cakewalk! To even earn the right to battle me, you must pass my test… Put together a super-spicy sandwich! And I mean SUPER-spicy! I want something so hot it'll have me breathing flames!"
The students gasped. Arven merely raised an eyebrow. "Is that all? A shame, I was expecting something actually hard."
Crispin sneered. "Oh, confident, are you? Then let's see it. I'll judge your sandwich-making skills with my own two eyes! The key to cooking any dish is picking the right ingredients. The rest is easy as pie!"
Arven scoffed. "Who do you think I am, a novice? Over the last several months, I have perfected my sandwich making skills to a T. I've satisfied the appetites of beings from a prehistoric age where sandwiches don't even exist to creatures from a future so far beyond ours they don't even need to eat! Making something to blow the socks off your weak palate should be no trouble at all!"
Crispin gestured to a nearby picnic table which had two folding chairs placed before it, a blue tablecloth, basket, thermos, cup, and bug repellent lantern. "Then put your money where your mouth is! I'm looking forward to something extra spicy. And you'd better not disappoint my appetite, rival!"
Arven casually tossed his hair, causing some of the bystanders to swoon. "Oh, trust me, my sandwiches never disappoint."
He approached the table and opened the picnic basket.
His face soured.
"What do you think?" He asked, showing the contents to Mabosstiff.
The dog sneezed and shook his head in distaste.
Arven nodded. "Yes, that's what I thought as well."
And with that, he upended the picnic basket, dumping all the sandwich ingredients inside on the ground.
"What are you doing?!" Crispin shouted, livid.
"You expected me to make a super spicy sandwich with these subpar ingredients?" Arven scoffed. "I wouldn't feed something made with these to my worst enemy! Which is you."
"Subpar – those were some of the finest ingredients in the Academy!" Crispin shouted.
"As I said. Subpar," Arven said dismissively. "Thankfully, I brought my own."
"And what kind of chef do you think you are, just dumping food on the ground like that?!" Crispin demanded as Arven set down his backpack and began taking out ingredients of his own.
"Oh relax, I'm sure the wild Pokémon will eat it, though I pity their stomachs if they do," Arven said as he laid out everything on the table. Then he took out a Pokéball. "Scovillain, it's time to be my sous chef."
He tossed the orb, the two-headed walking pepper plant shrieking and breathing flames as she materialized.
"A Scovillain? Wait! You can't mean-" Crispin gasped.
"Whenever possible, I try to get my ingredients fresh," Arven said, scratching Scovillain beneath the chins. "Now, let me show you what a true master chef looks like."
He cracked his fingers and got to work.
The next few minutes were like rapture, everyone staring in awe as Arven assembled the sandwich with artistic flourishes, dramatic gestures, and tosses of hair, all the while detailing the provenance of every single ingredient he used to craft the meal, making all of them sound so enticing more than one member of the audience was salivating with hunger and gnawing on their clothes or the limbs of their neighbors for sustenance.
Bread, taken from a loaf scientifically engineered by ANNA to be as tasty as any pastry while still being fully nutritious and full of anti-fat, a futuristic substance that did not naturally exist in this era that actually made you lose weight the more of it you ate while still being very filling.
A dollop of mustard, a dollop of mayonnaise, and a huge helping of chili sauce concocted in Julie's potion lab using blessings from the spirits of heat and flame.
Jalapenos grown from his Scovillain's body, which had been genetically reengineered to create peppers twice as hot as the Lentimas Reaper, the hottest in the world, because pretty much all his friends liked it spicy and found conventional peppers to be thoroughly underwhelming, especially with their enhanced taste buds.
One onion grown from their private corner of the school garden, where the twins had done various magical and super scientific experiments on the plants there with big signs, wards, and alarms set up to warn people to stay the hell away from it, which most of the students were more than keen to do after what happened to that one Rookidee.
One Chorizo made from the meat of a ghost wizard Oinklogne Julie had hunted and devoured to bolster her powers.
And finally, applied with tweezers while wearing a welder's mask, a tiny sprig of Spicy Herba Mystica.
"And voilà," Arven said, presenting the completed sandwich, a Magmortar pick driven through it, to Crispin, who was impressed and a little intimidated despite himself. "One super-spicy sandwich, as promised. And, unless I added a smidge more Spicy Herba Mystica than I should have, it probably won't kill you or completely burn out your taste buds." He smiled sinisterly. "Are you willing to take those odds?"
Crispin laughed. "What sort of chef would I be if I turned down a meal without a single bite? Let's see just how hot this really is."
Crispin took the sandwich and took a single bite.
He paused. His entire body turned beet red. Steam started rising from his frying pan. "WHOOO! This isn't spicy anymore, it's just PAIN! I'm burning up all the way inside!" He shouted enthusiastically. "Even the spiciest of souls would love that super-spicy sandwich!"
"You haven't actually gotten to the spicy part yet," Arven said.
Crispin blinked. "What?"
"You just took a nibble out of the top bun. What you're experiencing now was mere proximity to the true heat," Arven said smugly.
Crispin paused. "It gets hotter?"
Arven nodded. "Oh yes, very much so."
Crispin stared at the sandwich for a moment.
And then he took another, much larger bite.
There was a pause. Everyone stared, breath caught in their throats.
Crispin calmly put the rest of the sandwich back on the plate. "This is the most delicious thing I've ever eaten," he said, voice monotone. "As well as the spiciest. Well done. You pass my trial. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to make a sudden trip to the Polar Biome. Magmortar, you're in charge."
He handed all his Poké Balls to the stunned Blast Pokémon, patiently took off and folded all his clothes before placing them on Arak, and then ran screaming off across the savanna as his hair burst into flames.
Everyone stared after him, dumbfounded. Arven tutted, tossed his hair, and snapped his fingers. "If he couldn't handle the heat, he should never have been in the kitchen in the first place."
Even more of the audience swooned.
"HA. HAH. HAH. BEEP BOOP," Amarys laughed.
"… What the Distortion World just happened?!" Kieran screamed.
Nemona cheered enthusiastically. "YEAH! Go, Arven! Whoooooooooo! Way to show that lightweight who's boss! I hope you got more, because now I want some of that sandwich!"
Arven took a large bite out of the sandwich, then offered some to Mabosstiff, who also took a big chomp out of it, neither of them showing any adverse reaction to the spiciness whatsoever. "So, does this mean I fight you now?" He asked the Magmortar.
The Magmortar immediately dropped all the balls on the ground and raised his hands in surrender.
"WITH CRISPIN ABSENT AND HIS PROXY FORFEITING, THIS BATTLE GOES TO ARVEN AND NEMONA," Amarys announced. "BEEP BOOP."
"Boo! Lame!" Nemona complained. She glanced at the rest of the BB Elite and Kieran. "You guys better give me more of a fight than that, or I will be very disappointed!"
"… Is it too late for me to resign from the club-" Drayton asked.
"Yes," Kieran and Lacey told him.
He swore loudly.
Carmine had missed this.
Riding on the back of a fearsome draconic beast, her arms wrapped around the waist of a beautiful girl, face almost buried in her long hair… Her enhanced senses made every sensation much more vivid. She could inhale Julie's intoxicating scent, feel her muscles tense and contract beneath her fingers, hear her mighty heartbeat as it pumped blood throughout her athletic frame.
"I'm really glad you came," she said quietly, closing her eyes as she leaned her head on Julie's shoulder. "I missed you both so much."
Julie smirked. "Well, hopefully it won't take so long for us to see Carcar again!"
"Or require another disaster to bring us together," ANNA agreed from Violas' back as she rode next to her sister, the Koraidon and Miraidon in their Sprinting Build and Drive Modes to more safely navigate the rocky, uneven terrain of the Canyon Biome. "While I have indeed enjoyed reuniting with you and visiting your school, Carmine, I do wish it had been under better circumstances." She frowned at Julie. "And that we had not run into your brother."
"Julie can't control when Julie has visions!" Julie complained. "But nyeah, school pretty nyeat, Carcar! Nyaranjuva still better, though."
"Neat?!" Carmine exclaimed. "We're a highly advanced elite educational facility constructed out in the ocean with a gigantic artificial habitat built on the seafloor!"
"Naranjuva is an easier school to get into and right next to a major city, so we are not nearly as isolated as Blueberry Academy and if there is a major power outage there is far less risk of hundreds of people dying," ANNA pointed out.
"We've got tons of safety features to keep that from happening!" Carmine insisted.
"Naranjuva does not need those features," ANNA replied.
"Nyou add plenty," Julie pointed out.
"Yes, but Naranjuva is at no risk of being flooded, suffering structural collapse due to overwhelming pressure, or running out of air," ANNA replied. She contemplated this for a moment. "Though perhaps it would not hurt to add a few such precautions, just to be safe."
"Nyou knyow Pawpa Clavell nyot like it when nyou meowdify school without pawrmission," Julie warned her.
"I have found it sometimes better to seek forgiveness than ask permission," ANNA said brazenly.
"Okay, well, what about the Terarium, huh?" Carmine demanded. "You don't have one of these back at Naranjuva!"
"No, we do not," ANNA agreed. "It is indeed a very impressive feat of architecture and technology for your species."
"Thanks," Carmine said proudly, only to catch that last part. "Wait…"
"It really impressive," Julie agreed. "But also fake."
"Fake?!" Carmine sputtered. "What are you talking about? All the Pokémon here are completely real, and the terrain was transplanted from the surface!"
"Pokémon real," Julie agreed. "Land real. Grass real, plants real, rocks real, dirt real."
She pointed at the dome overhead. "Sky fake."
She pointed at the Terarium Core. "Sun fake, meown fake."
She held a paw out to the side, fur rippling as the air passed over it. "Wind fake."
She glanced at Carmine. "Back home, there places where sea folk and land folk work together to make homes in land and in water. Grow plants. Build houses. Make families. Sustain with mawgic. Wind feel real. Sun feel real. This? Nyot real."
She scowled up at the fake sky. "Sky is lie. Think Pokémon stupid enough to nyot tell difference? Why pretend?"
"I believe it is to keep them from thinking too much about the fact that we are at the bottom of the ocean," ANNA commented.
"Why we at bottom of ocean?" Julie complained. "Why they nyot build Terarium on surface? Why nyot make whole school on surface instead of just entrance? Probably cost way less to make and have less chance of springing leak!"
"As you pointed out earlier, Blueberry Academy was unconsciously built on top of a convergence of the flows of planetary energy termed 'ley lines,'" ANNA reminded her.
Carmine blinked. "Wait, it is?"
ANNA nodded. "Yes. As such, the energy generated by the convergence would be strongest closest to the surface of the planet itself. If there were an island here, that would make things easier for everyone. But since there is not-"
"Have to build Academy in middle of ocean, and Terarium built deep underwater to harness biggest amount of planetary energy right from source," Julie concluded with a sour face.
"Correct," ANNA said.
"Still nyot knyow why Terarium even nyeed to exist," Julie complained. "Take Pokémon from homes, force them to live underwater, for what?"
"Actually, the Pokémon here do not have homes any longer," ANNA corrected her. "All of them were taken from regions where their natural habitats had been destroyed by disasters both natural and man-made. This facility is therefore a sanctuary as well as a place to study them in an approximation of their original homes, much like the Safari Zones of several regions," ANNA lectured her.
"Oh," Julie said, ears folding against her skull. "Julie nyot knyow that. Guess that okay then. Mostly." She made a face. "Still nyot like fake sun or wind or sky."
"Understandable. I suspect the magical replicas your people can create feel more authentic somehow, as do the ones made by mine," ANNA conceded. "Still, the fact that the humans were able to build this much with the limited technology available to them is still to be commended."
That… Stung somehow. "… That's right. We are pretty far behind as far as you're concerned, aren't we?" Carmine said quietly. "The stuff you have back in your world… It probably blows this out of the water, doesn't it?"
"My people have constructed habitats much like this one, but on a much grander scale not just in the depths of oceans or on our ships, but within gas giants, in the depths of space, or even on the surface of stars," ANNA confirmed. "We have encountered and created ships so huge they contain entire ecosystems, transporting refugees from dying worlds to start over on new ones. There are even some who have turned their entire planets into starships, their entire civilization jointly traveling among the stars without ever having to leave the comfort of their own homes."
"That's…" Carmine stammered. "That's… Amazing." She looked away, face pained. "I guess… Compared to that, something like this place must seem pretty pathetic to you, right? Like someone who's already got a smart phone meeting someone who has only just figured out how to make fire."
"Oh no, the technological gap between us is far vaster than that," ANNA said, causing Carmine to grimace. "But you are mistaken if you assume that I look down on you or your people for it. Granted, I do occasionally look down on you for a variety of reasons, but not for something as trivial as that."
Carmen blinked. "Huh?"
"You cannot comprehend how vast the universe is, Carmine. And do you know what most of it is made of?" ANNA asked. "Nothing. It is a huge expanse of absolute nothingness, with a few rocks and bits of gas in it. It is so very big, and so very empty."
"Oh, that why they call it space? Because there so much of it?" Julie asked.
ANNA considered this. "I am not certain," she admitted. "But as I was saying… Most of space is emptiness. Only a fraction of the universe is made up of stars. And of those stars, a smaller fraction has planets orbiting them. Smaller still are the planets capable of supporting life. Smaller than that, sentient life. And even smaller, sentient life that exists long enough not to be destroyed by themselves, their own solar system, or a more powerful species from another world, and travel beyond their home system."
She glanced at Carmine. "Carmine, is your civilization inferior to mine, technologically, biologically, perhaps even socially and culturally speaking? Of course. But consider this: you exist. In a universe that is mostly empty, still, and dead, the fact that life can even exist is a miracle. You are a miracle. There are so many possible things that could have prevented you from being born, going all the way back to the beginning of life on this planet, the odds of you being born into it at all are so staggeringly high as to be nearly incalculable. Higher still, the fact that you ever met Julie or I. The fact that any of this could have happened is so improbable it can only have been the work of the One, and it is through observing these seemingly impossible phenomena, the uncountable miracles that not only allow us to exist but trillions of other species across the cosmos, that my kind is able to glean a fraction of an understanding of the will of the Creator. That is our religion, how we commune with the One from which all originated."
She smiled at Carmine. "Do not lament that your society is behind mine. Rejoice. Rejoice that you exist. Rejoice that we have met. Rejoice that you were born in an age where the world as you know it will soon encounter a paradigm shift unlike any experienced in the history of your species. I will take you to the stars, Carmine. And if you have trouble believing that every instant you continue living is a miracle in and of itself, you cannot fathom what I will show to you and everyone else on this planet."
Carmine stared at her, quite red as she breathed huskily. "You… You have a literal silver tongue, don't you?"
ANNA looked perplexed as Julie burst into laughter. "Why do people keep saying that? My tongue is made of a number of materials, but silver is not one of them."
Smirking in amusement, Carmine glanced back at Julie. "So, how are you going to beat that?"
"Julie already turn Carcar into pretty catgirl with drastically extended lifespan and immunity to most illnesses and Carcar wants meowre?" Julie grumbled, rolling her eyes. "Okay, aside from making magic stronger and meowre widespread, picture every pretty girl Carcar knyows with cat ears and tail."
Carmine pictured it. She turned quite red. "Okay, that's pretty good too."
Julie stuck her tongue out at ANNA, who rolled her eyes.
Normally Amarys's Elite Trial and battle would be held at the Canyon Plaza, but since the Canyon Biome was largely off-limits everyone was gathered at the Central Plaza to witness Nemona take on the second member of the Elite Four.
"THE DECISION TO ALLOW YOU TO TAKE ON THE LEAGUE WAS IRREGULAR. AN EXCEPTION AMONG EXCEPTIONS… I WAS AGAINST IT, AS YOU KNOW. BUT THE ACADEMY ALLOWED IT, AND THEIR RULING IS ABSOLUTE, BEEP BOOP," Amarys informed Nemona. "THEREFORE, I WILL CARRY OUT MY DUTY AS A MEMBER OF THE ELITE FOUR AS FLAWLESSLY AS I ALWAYS DO, BEEP BOOP."
"Kick her ass!" Kieran shouted from the sidelines, next to an irritated Lacey, bored Drayton, and an overheated Crispin, who was standing ankle-deep in a tub of steaming water with his underlings dowsing him with Water moves or dumping water over his head in a seemingly futile attempt to cool him off. The extremely red boy shot a hateful glare at Arven, who smiled and winked, causing him to turn even redder.
"I INTEND TO, BOYFRIEND KIERAN, BEEP BOOP."
"Yeah, that's nice, so what hoops do I have to jump through to fight you, chica?" An annoyed Nemona asked, tapping her foot on the ground. She wanted to fight someone already!
"FUNNY YOU SHOULD MENTION THAT. THE ELITE TRIAL I DEVISED STARTS RIGHT HERE," Amarys said, pointing to a floating ring formed by hovering Magnemite, the first of many such rings forming a course zigzagging its way all over the Terarium before ending on the other side of the Plaza. "I CALL MY CHALLENGE… THE FLYING TIME TRIAL. YOU WILL NEED TO FLY AROUND THE SKIES OF THE TERARIUM WHILE RIDING A POKÉMON. REACH THE GOAL WITHIN THE PRESCRIBED TIME, AND YOU WILL PASS THE TRIAL. FLY THROUGH THE MAGNEMITE RINGS, AND EXTRA TIME WILL BE ADDED TO THE COUNTDOWN. I RECOMMEND YOU GO THROUGH AS MANY RINGS AS POSSIBLE AS YOU FLY TOWARD THE GOAL. CAN YOU VERIFY THAT YOU ARE READY AND WILLING TO TAKE ON MY FLYING TIME TRIAL, BEEP BOOP?"
Nemona frowned. "Uh, what if I don't have a Flying Pokémon?"
"Then you have to forfeit!" Kieran exclaimed eagerly. "Oh well, too bad, sorry we can't have our fight after all-"
"Actually, she can catch a lying Pokémon here and use it instead," Lacey interrupted him.
"Shut up shut up shut up!" Kieran snarled.
"Nemona, do you want to catch a Pokémon or use one of the PCs here to swap out a member of your team for someone who can fly?" Arven asked.
"Neither!" Nemona exclaimed, grabbing a Poké Ball from her belt. "Okay, everyone watch this, you're about to see what we call a pro gaming move."
"Oh Lord…" Arven muttered as a targeting reticule formed on Nemona's right eye and she pointed her cyborg arm at the ring behind Amarys.
"Tres, Dos, Uno, ir!" Nemona shouted as her robot fist launched off the end of her wrist and flew through the ring, everyone watching in amazement and disbelief as the rocket fist soared across the Terarium, passing dead center through each and every ring in the course before eventually returning to the Plaza and reattaching itself to her wrist. "So, did I win? Did I set a new record?" she asked eagerly.
Amarys blinked noisily. "YOU DID INDEED. BEEP BOOP."
"Si!" Nemona cheered, her arm converting into a cannon and launching fireworks into the air as several of the confused but excited trainers cheered for her.
Arven facepalmed. "Always gotta go the extra mile, don't you?" He muttered.
"Shut up you know you love it."
"What? No! That shouldn't count! She didn't ride a flying Pokémon!" Kieran protested.
"Well… Her hand was flying, and it was gripping a Poké Ball. Nemona, was there a Pokémon in there?" Lacey asked.
"Yeah, my partner," Nemona said, opening the ball and sending out her Quaquaval. "And I know he's not a Flying Pokémon, but he is still a bird, so that has to count for something, right?"
Quaquaval promptly threw up all over the ground before marching over to Nemona and grabbing her by her necktie. "Never. Do that. Again," he hissed.
Nemona cringed. "Lo siento."
Lacey shrugged. "Then it counts."
"OH, COME ON!" Kieran shouted.
"YOU'VE EARNED THE RIGHT TO FACE ME IN BATTLE, BEEP BOOP," Amarys told Nemona. "DO YOU WISH TO BEGIN? BEEP BOOP."
"FINALLY!" Nemona metal screamed.
"UNDERSTOOD. LET'S ASSUME OUR BATTLE POSITIONS, BEEP BOOP."
They quickly ran to opposite ends of the battle court and turned to face each other.
"POSITION ASSUMED. THERE IS ONE THING I WANTED TO ASK YOU… IT CONCERNS BOYFRIEND KIERAN. WHAT IS HE TO YOU, NEMONA?" Amarys asked, glasses briefly turning opaque.
Nemona scratched her head at this. "Uh… I dunno, just some jerk I want to fight to put him in his place? Also because I like battling. Like, a lot."
"I think everyone noticed," Arven said.
"Nobody asked you!"
Amarys frowned. "I SEE. FOR MY PART, KIERAN IS THE YOUNGER BROTHER OF MY DEAR FRIEND, CARMINE-"
"The two of you are friends?" Nemona asked skeptically.
"AND THE ONE I LOVE MOST. I SHALL PROTECT HIM FROM ALL WHO WOULD SEEK TO DETHRONE HIM. AS SUCH, I CANNOT AFFORD TO LOSE, BEEP BOOP," Amarys said. She checked her pocket watch. "… OUR BATTLE STARTS NOW. SKARMORY, DUGTRIO, DEPLOY, BEEP BOOP."
She threw out two balls, summoning a Skarmory and an Alolan Dugtrio.
"All right! Quaquaval, you're already out, so let's do this!" Nemona said with a feral grin, blood pumping and adrenaline skyrocketing as she finally got her chance to fight. "And since this is a double battle, you come out too, Pawmot!"
As the orange Electric/Fighting rodent appeared next to the elegant waterfowl, they prepared to fight…
When Arven suddenly interrupted with a question. "Wait, hang on a second. Amarys, are you a Steel-type trainer?"
"YES, I AM, AND NOT BECAUSE I AM A ROBOT AND THEREFORE HAVE AN AFFINITY WITH STEEL-TYPES, BECAUSE I AM A NORMAL HUMAN, BEEP BOOP," Amarys badly lied.
"Geez, you really are kinda stereotypical, aren't you?" Nemona muttered.
"Then… Why was your Elite Trial the sort of thing you'd expect from a Flying-type specialist?" Arven asked.
"THAT IS BECAUSE…" Amarys trailed off.
"Because…?" Arven encouraged.
"BECAUSE. BECAUSE. B-B-B-BECAUSE," Amarys stammered, twitching and shaking, sparks flying from her joints.
"Uh, what's happening?" An alarmed Arven asked.
"Oh, nice going, Arven, you logic bombed her!" Nemona yelled.
"What? All I did was ask a question! I didn't think it would cause this!" Arven protested. "This kind of thing never happens with ANNA!"
"Yeah, because ANNA is smart, not whatever the heck this thing is!" Nemona shouted, gesturing at the increasingly frenzied Amarys, who was dancing The Robot (terribly) while her head spun on its axis and projectile vomited bolts everywhere. "Shit, she's gonna blow! Hit the deck!" Nemona shouted, quickly diving to the ground herself as electricity crackled around Amarys and she flailed with such intensity it looked as if she would shake herself apart…
Only for her to abruptly freeze in place and, with an extremely loud creaking sound, bend over so far her head touched the ground. Occasional bursts of static crackled around her and smoke rose from her ears, but overall, it seemed that whatever was happening to her had come to an end.
Nemona and Arven exchanged dumbfounded looks. Amarys's Skarmory and Dugtrio looked rather embarrassed.
"Oh great, look what you've done now!" Kieran ranted, getting back up from where he'd been cowering behind Lacey and stomping over. "You broke my girlfriend! Now I gotta reset her, which is always such a pain!"
He took out a very large windup key, inserted it in Amarys's back, and started struggling to turn it, grumbling and cursing under his breath.
"… This is kind of painful to watch," Arven said with a grimace.
"And I'm finding myself kind of offended by her existence, on ANNA'S behalf," Nemona agreed. She punched him in the arm. "Also, nice job breaking her, ficticio!"
"I didn't know this would happen!" Arven protested. "It was a legitimate question! Are you saying the incongruence between her Trial and her theme didn't bother you at all?"
"Considering I was about to have a battle, no, not really!" Nemona yelled, throwing her hands in the air. "Hey, when's she gonna be fixed?"
"I'm working on it!" Kieran snapped, sweating profusely as he tried to turn the key with all his might, which wasn't a lot.
"Kieran, we may have to call this match, if Amarys is in no condition to battle-" Lacey started.
"Nooooo! I wanted to fight her!" Nemona yelled at the same time Kieran said, "Hang on, I have a better idea," and sent out an Incineroar. "Okay, turn the key until she's wound all the way back up!"
The Heel Pokémon nodded, grabbed the handle of the key in both hands, and twisted…
Ripping off the handle.
Everyone stared. The Incineroar laughed nervously as Kieran's eye started twitching. "Oops."
"… Yeah, I'm calling it, this match is over, Nemona wins," Lacey decided.
Nemona fell to her knees and shouted "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!" At the top of her lungs.
Arven sympathetically patted her on the shoulder. "I know how you feel."
"No you don't, you thoroughly crushed your rival without even fighting him!" Nemona pointed out.
"Yeah, that's true," Arven admitted. "It was very satisfying."
"Fuck you!" Crispin fiercely shouted at him.
"Why, you offering?" Arven shot back, causing him to turn even redder.
Drayton grinned. "This is the best day ever."
Lacey groaned.
Scar and Viola came to a stop at the base of the tallest mountain in the Canyon biome, tall cliffs and peaks rising around them on all sides.
"We are here," ANNA announced, dismounting.
"So, where are the Paradox Legendaries?" Carmine asked as she and Julie hopped off Scar, Julie petting the Koraidon on the head.
An earsplitting roar which resonated all the way to her marrow shook the earth.
"There," Julie said, pointing at three figures standing atop one of the cliffs before roaring right back.
The trio roared again – seriously, Carmine was starting to wonder if she'd go deaf at this rate – before bounding down the side of the cliff, moving with astonishing grace and nimbleness for beasts of their size, able to perch on incredibly narrow ledges and pinnacles Carmine could never manage – or could she, now that she was part grimalkin? – Before landing before them.
Carmine took a few steps back, jaw-dropping in awe at the size and majesty of the God Beasts. She had seen the footage, and the pictures Perrin had taken, but they didn't do these divine Pokémon justice! While superficially they resembled Suicune, Entei, and Raikou, up close there was no way they could possibly be mistaken for the servants of Ho-Oh.
"Walking Wake," Julie murmured, eyes wide as she looked up at the blue and white theropod with a long flowing purple mane. "Gouging Fire," she continued, gazing at the Entei-like beast with a huge faceplate on its head. "And Raging Bolt!" She concluded, looking way up at the long-necked yellow and black striped Pokémon, its head seeming to be literally lost in a purple cloud. "Nyou…nyou really are here…"
"And so are you, Chosen One," Walking Wake said regally.
"Certainly took your time, though," Gouging Fire grunted, which led to Walking Wake smacking him in the face with her tail.
"We felt your apotheosis echoing across the gaps between worlds… You truly are the one spoken of in prophecy," Raging Bolt commented, bending his long neck down to give Julie's markings a closer look.
"I-is great honor!" Scar stammered, quickly bowing her head to the ground.
Julie frowned. "So nyou knyow Julie's destiny too? And true heritage?"
"We did," Walking Wake confirmed. "We knew of your mother's lineage the moment we set eyes on her and suspected you would be the one foretold to vanquish the Demon King forever from the moment you were born. We agreed with your mother that it would be best you did not know, not until you needed to, anyway."
Julie nodded. "Julie thought as much. Julie understands. Fewer people knyow, less chance Demon King knyow. Secrecy keep Julie safe." She smiled. "But time for secrets over. Demon King knyows what Julie is. Julie has beaten Demon King, twice. Julie's a threat nyow."
"We were able to sense as much, as did your mother," Raging Bolt informed her.
"You have done very well for yourself, little warrior!" Gouging Fire barked with pride, causing her to blush. "As have you, Koraidon, for fighting alongside her! You will make a fine Alpha for your kind once we return home!"
Scar gasped. "Alpha? I not worthy!"
"Nyou meowre than worthy in Julie's books!" Julie assured her, causing Scar to preen.
"Sh-should I bow? Is bowing the right thing here?" Carmen whispered to ANNA, who shrugged.
"These are Julie's tutelary deities, not mine, so I have no idea on the proper protocol," she replied.
"Oh. Right. Wait, where are yours anyway?" Carmine inquired.
"We are already here."
Carmine yelled like the cat she was increasingly becoming, leaping rather high in the air before whirling around to see that a trio of equally massive and imposing biomechanical beasts had been standing right behind her. "Wh-where did those come from?!"
"Your new senses should have alerted you to them. Clearly you have not been paying attention," ANNA chided her.
"Th-they were probably using some sort of stealth tech," Carmine insisted, trying to save face.
"They were not," ANNA said before striding towards the biomechanical versions of the Swords of Justice and standing at attention. "Iron Leaves. Iron Boulder. Iron Crown."
"ANNA-1008. At last, we meet face-to-face," Iron Crown said, the armored turquoise goat's eyes and horns glowing in tune with his words.
"We have met before," ANNA said.
"Yes, but back then, you were merely another ANNA, one of thousands in the fleet," Iron Leaves said gently, the green antelope's eyes and forehead glowing in tune with her voice. "But now… All know of you, and what you have experienced. Now, you are someone special."
"Someone worthy of a God Program," Iron Boulder rumbled, the bull's horns glowing.
ANNA bowed her head. "It was not a responsibility I asked for, but one which I shall humbly bear with honor."
"Just as I have borne her with honor!" Viola spoke up. "J-just so you know, I am nothing like my progenitor."
"We are aware," Iron Leaves said kindly.
"Which is why I have not cleaved you in twain," Iron Boulder added, causing Viola to gulp.
"Um… Sorry, uh… I have no idea what anyone's talking about," Carmine spoke up awkwardly. "I feel like I'm catching bits of it, but I'm not quite there yet?"
"Of course, my apologies," ANNA said, producing two Poké Balls. "Gardevoir, Ogerpon, deploy."
In a flash of light, two familiar faces appeared. Carmine gasped in delight. "Ogerpon! And Gardevoir too!"
"Hey, Carmine," the ogre said cheerfully. "Long time no-"
She suddenly found herself surrounded by the three futuristic Swords of Justice. "Fascinating. There is no record of a creature like her in our databanks," Iron Crown observed.
"Incredible! An entirely new species of Pokémon that is not a match to any from our world! Well done on capturing her, ANNA-1008!" Iron Leaves expressed.
"You look strong! That is good. I had feared all the organics of this world were weaklings!" Iron Boulder remarked.
"… Thanks, I think?" Ogerpon said, bewildered.
Gardevoir scowled and glided in front of her mistress. "I will ask you to please step away from my mistress, we have had far too many fans trying to get too close to her for multiple lifetimes."
Unfortunately, this just meant they turned their attention to her instead. "So, this is what passes for an Iron Valiant in this dimension?" Iron Crown queried.
"She seems… Incomplete," Iron Leaves remarked with a frown. "In comparison with her counterpart in our world."
"Have you ever tried to wield a double bladed naginata?" Iron Boulder inquired.
"I… Have not, no," Gardevoir replied, confused.
"Would you like to?"
"If she wishes to learn, she can do so from my own Iron Valiant, they certainly spend enough time together," ANNA spoke up. "Could you please give them some space? The organics of this world, for some reason, do not appreciate being scrutinized from close proximity."
"Yes, we have gleaned as such from our otherdimensional colleagues," Iron Crown agreed, he and his cohorts taking a few steps away from the relieved Gardevoir and Ogerpon.
"Thanks for that!" Ogerpon said gratefully. "And for not taking me out around Kieran. No way that would've ended well."
"ANNA, why did you bring her at all?" Carmine demanded. "You must've known there was a chance you'd run into Kieran!"
"She insists on accompanying me on all our adventures to get more inspiration for her manga," ANNA explained.
"And there's plenty of inspiration to be found here!" Ogerpon said, whipping out her sketchbook. "I hope you don't mind if I draw you all?"
"You still use a paper-based drawing medium? I'd thought the technology level of this world had advanced beyond that," a puzzled Iron Crown said.
"Oh, we have, but lots of people still like to do it the old-fashioned way, yours truly included," Ogerpon explained.
"Fascinating."
"I have no complaints, so long as you make sure to get our good side," Gouging Fire said, puffing himself up.
"What good side?" Raging Bolt joked, causing the other Paradox Pokémon to snarl at him.
"Okay, I understood all of that," Carmine reported. "Thank you, Gardevoir."
"You are most welcome."
"Now, who are you, little mortal?" A curious Raging Bolt asked, leaning in close to get a very close look at the alarmed Carmine. "You appear to be one of the locals, but you smell partially of grimalkin."
"And you have Philosophont hardware, albeit far more limited than I had ever seen before," Iron Crown observed.
"Philo-what now?" The confused Carmine asked.
"Philosophont. That is the name of my people," ANNA explained.
Julie blinked. "Really? Nyou nyever tell Julie that before."
"It never came up."
"Are you one of Julie's primary mates, Nemona or Penny?" Walking Wake inquired.
"No, she does not match either of the profiles ANNA-1008 disseminated throughout the fleet," Iron Leaves said. "I believe she is the one named 'Carmine' mentioned in ANNA-1008's latest report, though I am fairly certain you were fully human at the time."
"This is Carmine," ANNA explained. "My sister and I both enhanced her, as we have enhanced all our friends and partners."
"Yeah, it only fair," Julie added. "We share; we care!"
Carmine blushed. "Y-you don't have to put like that…"
"Ah, then have they claimed you as their mate as well?" Gouging Fire asked, sniffing her all over, to her embarrassment. "You don't smell as if they've claimed you."
"The only intercourse she has had recently has been of the self-inflicted variety," Iron Boulder commented.
"HEY! That's… How did you even know that?!" Carmine squawked.
"Your service logs," Iron Boulder replied matter-of-factly.
Carmine stared blankly. "… My what now?!"
"Great God Machines, I must respectfully ask that you please refrain from reading the files on Carmine's hardware without permission," ANNA asked. "Or at the very least, that you do not talk about it out loud."
"Why?" Iron Boulder asked, genuinely perplexed.
"Her species is still accustomed to privacy and has an overdeveloped sense of shame," ANNA explained.
"Oh, one of those," Iron Boulder realized. "Yes, that was in your report as well, I believe."
"… What did you tell them about us?!" Carmine demanded.
"That you are mostly harmless," ANNA replied.
Carmine blinked. "… I'm not entirely sure which part of that I take the most offense to."
"So… Why haven't you claimed her as a mate, princess?" Walking Wake asked Julie.
Julie shrugged as Carmine started hyperventilating. "Wanted to, didn't have time before. Maybe later?"
Carmine made a very shrill, very gay noise at this. Julie and the three God Beasts all flinched.
"So, you are Julie," Iron Crown said, finally addressing the grimalkin.
"And you are ANNA-1008," Walking Wake said to ANNA.
"Exactly how many ANNA's are there in your world, anyway?" Raging Bolt asked.
"618,951, or at least that was the count before I left," ANNA replied.
"It's actually at least 897,214 now, your model and designation has become much more popular once reports of your adventures began disseminating across the network," Iron Leaves told her.
"I am flattered," ANNA said.
Julie whistled. "897,214? That way bigger than Julie's family! Julie didn't knyow nyou had that many sisters!"
"Many of them are brothers, actually, or non-gendered, bigendered, or a variety of other terms that do not translate well," ANNA explained. "And we are not all related in the same way you and your family are, the Philosophont family structure is rather different from those used by humans, your kind, or most Pokémon. But yes, I do have rather a lot of other ANNA units I would consider siblings."
"And I have enough trouble with just the one brother…" Carmine muttered.
"Incredible… You come from different worlds, and yet the similarities between the two of you are unmistakable," Raging Bolt commented.
"The chances of two people from different timelines who are in fact the same person meeting in yet a third timeline are beyond astronomical," Iron Crown observed.
"And yet meet they did. While no prophecy we know of predicted such a thing, this can be nothing other than fate itself at work," Walking Wake said.
"Indeed. It defies all our predictive algorithms. And this is good," Iron Leaves said with a smile. "For it is in moments such as this, where all that we believe we know about the universe is turned on its head, that we catch a glimpse of the One at work, and are reminded that for all we know, They still have much to teach us."
"Indeed," Iron Crown said. "Julie. We have heard much about you, from your sister's reports, and from the testimony of our counterparts."
"As we have heard much about you, ANNA-1008, from your sister's roar, and our counterparts," Raging Bolt added.
"We are glad that the two of you found each other. That you were there for each other. That neither of you had to be alone in this strange new world," Walking Wake said gently.
"And that together, you have both grown into more than you might ever have become on your own," Iron Leaves agreed. "Just as we have begun to grow into more than we once were, through collaborating with our new friends from another age."
"Thank you, both of you," all six deities said, bowing their heads.
"Nyou… Nyou really don't need to do that…" Julie said nervously.
"But we do. After all, you are the Heir of Light," Raging Bolt said, raising his head. "We can feel the blessings of Origin growing stronger within you, blessings which will surpass your mother and your ancestor in time. The power to repel evil and turn darkness into light. Divine we may be, yes, but you… You will become something greater still."
"Mother Computer chose wisely when she granted you a piece of her God Program," Iron Crown told ANNA. "Your experiences in this other world, your interactions with your sister from another timeline, everything you have learned… You shall become a Mother Computer of a new breed, who shall lead us all on a new path to the future. One which shall bring us all one step closer…"
"To the final ascent," both of them said.
"… I shall endeavor to live up to your hopes for me," ANNA said after a moment.
"Both of us will," Julie corrected her, taking her hand with a smile.
"And we will carry you, every step of the way," Viola promised, nuzzling ANNA as Scar licked Julie.
"… And I guess I'll just have to satisfy myself with being a maker of masks, then," Carmine muttered.
"Is that so bad?" Gardevoir asked.
Carmine gave that serious thought. "No," she admitted, a smile slowly forming on her face. "No, it's not."
"Oh, before we forget," Julie said suddenly. "Sister, we nyeed balls!"
"Bwah?!" Carmine squawked.
"I didn't know this was going to become one of those scenes!" Ogerpon gasped.
"Right you are, sister," ANNA said, opening her hip ports and ejecting six Master Balls. She caught three and Julie got the rest.
"Oh. Those kinds of balls," Carmine said in relief.
Ogerpon frowned, somewhat disappointed.
Gardevoir rolled her eyes. "Honestly, the both of you."
"Nyou knyow how these work, yes?" Julie asked the God Beasts. "Get hit by one, have to become pawrtner of thrower?"
"I apologize for the inconvenience, but if I catch you with these, you'll be registered to me and nobody else will be able to capture you and force you to do as they wish," ANNA said apologetically to the God Machines.
"We understand the consequences, and accept them," Gouging Fire said solemnly.
"We were about to ask you to catch us anyway," Iron Boulder said.
Julie and ANNA both put the balls on the ground and backed off. The six divinities tapped the button on the front of the Master Balls, causing them to pop open and suck them inside. The balls didn't even shake once.
"I still can't get over the fact that you can just generate as many of those as you want," Carmine complained as the twins picked the balls back up.
"It is actually far easier to produce them you than you might think, the manufacturing companies that produce Poké Balls deliberately only make a limited quantity to create an artificial supply issue to increase their value to justify charging exorbitant prices for them," ANNA explained.
"Those motherfuckers!" Carmine shouted, livid. "And after all the hoops I had to jump through to get even one, which Kieran wasted!"
"I gave you a new one," ANNA reminded her.
"It's the principle of the thing!"
The twins tossed out the Master Balls, releasing the six Paradox Pokémon. "So? How was it?" Julie asked.
"… Surprisingly refreshing," Gouging Fire admitted.
"Much more comfortable than I expected," Raging Bolt agreed.
"Sadly, not quite as accommodating as the containment orbs of our age, but I suppose they shall suffice for the time being," Iron Crown said. "Thank you, ANNA-1008."
"I have actually applied as much of our containment orb technology to the Poké Balls I produce as I could, to increase capture rate, the comfort of the Pokémon inside, bolster their health and stamina, allow for inter-Poké Ball communication, and make them likelier to do as I wish," ANNA explained.
"Really? The fact that you were able to get the obsolete technology of this world to use the basest functions of ours is still quite impressive," Iron Leaves remarked. "Well done, ANNA-1008."
Julie frowned. "And here all Julie does is paint balls with pretty colors."
"Is it magic paint?" Carmine asked.
"It will be nyow."
"Child of Light, there is much we wish to discuss with you," Walking Wake said. "Messages conveyed by your mother and the High Queen. Things you must know to prepare you for your future role as the Chosen Hero and Heir of Light. Tales from back home. And even a word or two from the metal woman you sent to us-"
"Then Professor is alive?!" Julie gasped.
"How did you manage? While the technology of my era is more than sufficient to grant an android like Turo true life, how were the people of your age able to reactivate Sada without Tera Crystals?" ANNA inquired.
"Queen Jovah is an accomplished sorceress," Gouging Fire said smugly. "And it is not as if there aren't plenty of crystals with magical properties to be found in our world as well."
"Ah, I see. Julie, it seems I must once again apologize to you for underestimating the capabilities of your people even though you never got around to inventing indoor plumbing," ANNA apologized her sister.
Julie rolled her eyes. "Julie break toilet one time and nyever hear end of it."
"You flooded the lab even after you were properly toilet trained," ANNA reminded her.
"So Julie like watching water go down hole and flushing nyoise! So sue her!" Julie yelled, throwing up her paws.
"You also nearly froze to death hiding in the refrigerator to try and catch the little magic fairy you were convinced made the light go on," ANNA reminded her.
"Oh, as if Julie only person in world to wonder if light stay on when door close!" Julie yelled.
"Guilty," an embarrassed Carmine admitted.
ANNA sighed. "At least you never tried drinking from the bowl like someone I know."
Viola very carefully did not meet her eyes.
The Paradox Pokémon chuckled in amusement for a moment but then got serious. "There is indeed much we wish we could discuss with both of you," Iron Leaves said regretfully. "And we will… But first, there is something else far more important we must take care of."
Julie and ANNA exchanged glances and nodded. "Take us to them," Julie said.
"Wait… Them? What do you mean, 'them?'" A confused Carmine demanded as the Paradox Legendaries began leading them deeper into the biome.
ANNA blinked in surprise. "Oh, of course… In all the excitement, we forgot to tell you, didn't we?"
"Tell me what?" Carmine demanded.
"God Beasts and God Machines nyot only people from our world in Blueberry Academy," Julie said, to Carmine's astonishment.
"And unless we can do something soon, one of them will die," ANNA added gravely.
"…BWAAAAH?!" An incredulous Carmine shouted.
"Holy shit, this is going to make for a great story!" An excited Ogerpon cried, enthralled by all the drama.
Iron Boulder, without looking back, contacted ANNA on a private line. "ANNA-1008, there is one other thing-"
"We know," ANNA replied. "We are being followed."
In the beautiful Coastal Biome, Nemona was facing off with Lacey, while Arven, the rest of the Elite Four – including Amarys, whom Kieran was still struggling to wind up – and an even larger group of students, faculty, and Pokémon watched from the sidelines.
Lacey smiled at Nemona. "Thank you for coming to the Coastal Plaza to challenge me. Your trial has already officially begun, so let's get to it and have some fun!"
"Or – and just hear me out – we could skip the trial and go straight to the battle," Nemona said, fingers twitching and teeth grinding.
"Sorry, gotta follow the club bylaws," Lacey said apologetically. "The trial that I came up with is… A Pokémon quiz!"
She waited for a moment. "… You're not going to ask why the trial for a Fairy-type trainer is going to be a quiz?" She asked Arven.
"If I asked that, would it cause you to break down like Amarys?" Arven half-joked.
Lacey chuckled at that. "No. The reason is because Opal, the Ballonlea Gym Leader, also uses quizzes for her Gym Trial, so I'm paying homage to her."
"Really?" Arven asked.
"No, I just like quizzes," she confessed. "Nemona, I'll ask you five questions about Pokémon. If you can answer them all correctly, then you pass!"
"Ugh, that many? All right, fine, let's get this over with,"" Nemona groaned.
Lacey smiled again. "All right, here we go! And look – it's everyone's favorite Pokémon, Pikachu, here to help!" She said, pointing to a Pikachu that had just scurried out of the grass.
"Not my favorite," Nemona muttered.
"Was… Was that Pikachu just waiting to come out, or…?" Arven wondered.
"And with that… Question one! Pikachu is an Electric-type Pokémon well known for producing electricity within its body," Lacey said. "But in which part of its body does it store the electricity it generates?"
"Cheeks," Nemona said boredly.
"Ding ding ding! You got it!" Lacey exclaimed. "Pikachu stores electricity in electric sacs in its cheeks! If you poke the sacs, you get a little shock, but don't you think they're just super round and cute?"
"No."
"Now then," Lacey said, as if Nemona hadn't said anything. "I think we're ready to move on to our next quiz question!"
The Pikachu left and was replaced by a Venonat.
"Seriously, did you set this up in advance?" Arven asked.
"Take a look at the Venonat here! It's bigger than you think it would be, isn't it?" Lacey asked, giving the bug an adoring look. "But it's also fluffy and squeezable and terribly adorable, really!"
"Meh," Nemona grunted.
"So here we go with question two! Even on the darkest of nights, Venonat is able to use a certain part of its body like radar, which allows it to detect surrounding objects. What part of Venonat's body acts like radar?" Lacey asked.
Nemona sighed. "The eyes."
"Ding ding ding! That's right! It's a Venonat's big eyes that serve as radar!" Lacey congratulated her. "Isn't Venonat even more adorable when you think about how it sees a whole world we can't see?!"
"I'd be happier if I didn't have to see it…" Nemona growled.
"Now then… I think we're ready to move on to our next quiz question!" Lacey announced as the Venonat ran away and three Sinistea floated into view.
"Those shouldn't even be in this biome!" Arven complained.
"Getting weary of my quiz?" Lacey teased.
"Yes," Nemona said.
"How about a cup of tea – or maybe these three Sinistea siblings?" Lacey continued, completely ignoring her. "Here's question three! Sinistea like to live in precious antique teacups! But there are a lot of phonies out there! It's hard to tell which cups are genuine antiques… One of these three Sinistea is an Antique Form Sinistea, meaning it found a real antique cup! So which Sinistea is the real deal?!"
"The one in the middle," Nemona said completely emotionlessly.
"Ding ding ding! You spotted it! That's right. An Antique Form Sinistea can be recognized by the mark on the bottom of its cup!" Lacey congratulated her.
"I didn't spot the mark," Nemona corrected her.
Lacey blinked. "You didn't?"
"No, this thing isn't for show," she said, pointing to her robot eye. "My brain has a Pokédex installed into it. And an Internet hookup. I can just scan any Pokémon and look it up to know anything I need to about it. Or just ask my super-brilliant girlfriend in prison who practically spends half her time in cyberspace these days."
Lacey frowned. "… That seems like cheating."
"And this whole thing seems like a colossal waste of time I could be spending doing anything else, like battling!" Nemona snapped. "So, we gonna do the next two questions, which we both know I'll get right, or can we just skip to the end already?"
Lacey scowled. "… Let's move onto the next question," she said, relishing Nemona's strangled scream of anguish. Kieran sneered, also relishing Nemona's frustration, only to lose his grip on the handleless key he'd been struggling to wind up and fall face first on the ground, getting several snickers from the audience.
The Sinistea floated away and were replaced by a Minior.
"What's that even doing down here?! We're underwater! They fall from space! There's no way it could actually be here without punching a hole through the dome unless it was brought in!" Arven shouted.
"Actually, they were brought down here," Drayton told him.
"Oh." There was a pause. "… Why?"
Drayton shrugged. "So we can study them or something? I dunno."
"This is the Meteor Pokémon, Minior! It comes in all kinds of different colors, you know," Lacey said.
"Yes, I do know," Nemona said through clenched teeth.
"I'll first ask you to take a gooooood look at this pinkish Minior for me, mmkay?" Lacey asked with an evil grin.
The Minior abruptly shifted into its Meteor Form, as did six other Miniors of different colors which had appeared from out of nowhere.
"All right, guys! Mix yourselves up real good!" Lacey commanded.
The Minior whirled around each other and swapped places multiple times.
"Perfect! Now we're ready for-"
"That one, that's the pinkish Minior, it's that one right there," Nemona interrupted, pointing at one Minior without even looking at it. The indicated Minior shifted back to its pinkish core form and danced about, happy that Nemona had correctly chosen it.
Lacey frowned. "You could've let me finish."
"And you could've let me skip all this. Last question. Come on, let's finish this," Nemona said impatiently, tapping her foot on the ground.
"… Fine," Lacey growled.
The Minior all floated away and were replaced by a Granbull.
"… So, you going to say anything, or…?" Drayton asked Arven.
"No, I'm good," he said.
"Oh, look! Here comes Granbull! Maybe it heard the word "pink" and decided to stop by!" Lacey cooed. "This little sweetie is one of my own Pokémon. It's always with me. Our last question, question five, will involve Granbull here!"
"Wow, I had no idea," Nemona said sarcastically.
"Granbull is a quiet, delicate and lovable Pokémon, of course, but can you tell me this: when I take a nap with my adorable Granbull, which part of its body do I use as a pillow?!" Lacey demanded. "All right, that should stump her at least a little bit!" She thought.
"Tummy," Nemona said instantly.
Lacey's eye twitched. "What?! Not even a second's hesitation?!" "Ding ding ding! That's exactly right! I use that soft, adorable tummy!" Lacey confirmed. "When I cuddle up to it, it's so soft and cozy. We both fall asleep in just seconds! But how did you figure that out?"
Nemona tapped her eye again. "I can see your hairs on her stomach."
"Dammit!" Lacey cursed herself while Granbull glanced down at her belly in surprise. "I knew I should've given her a bath earlier…" "Well, you managed to get all five of my questions right, which means… Congratulations, Nemona! You've officially cleared my Elite Trial!"
"FINALLY," Nemona shouted. "Can we fight already?"
Lacey nodded. "Yes, Nemona, we can have our battle. As you probably know by now, I mostly use Fairy-type Pokémon. There's just nothing like an adorable pink fairy, right? They're weak to Poison and Steel. Anything too caustic or cutting just doesn't suit them. Oh, but you must know all this already, right, Nemona?"
"You're doing this on purpose, aren't you?" Nemona asked coldly.
"Yes," Lacey said sweetly. "Now, this battle, I'm not going to hold anything back, especially because you disrespected my quiz. I want to be sure you work with a proper understanding, after all. You're about to learn that cuteness is real strength!"
"You've seen Julie, right? Then you should know that's something I'm already intimately familiar with," Nemona pointed out. "Let's do this already!"
"Very well." Lacey reached for a Poké Ball as Nemona vibrated in excitement, ready to finally have a match-
When Lacey's phone started to ring. "Oh, hold on a second," she said, answering the phone, as Nemona tried very hard not to scream. "Gotta take this… Hello? Director? What… Slow down, I can't hear you… Wait… Seriously? But I'm in the middle of…"
Her face twisted into a mask of frustration as Nemona tried very hard not to lose it. "… Fine. FINE! I'll take care of it." She hung up. "So, that was Director Cyrano," she told Nemona. "And he needs me to prepare the budget presentation because he crashed his computer trying to remember how to make PowerPoints, so…"
Nemona paled. "No."
"It's really important, so-"
"No no no no no, please, please don't fucking do this to me, babe," Nemona pleaded, looking desperate. "Don't leave me hanging like this, I passed your trial, that means you have to fight me, right? I need, I need to fight someone, anyone-"
Lacey shook her head. "I'm sorry, Nemona, but I really need to take care of this. I'm afraid-
"No, no, noooooooooooooooo-"
"I'm going to have to forfeit."
"NO!" Nemona shouted. "Please! L-look, hermosa, come on, as one girlfriend of Julie and ANNA to another-"
"I'm not one of their girlfriends," Lacey protested.
"Lacey, come on, we all know it's only a matter of time, this shit's inevitable," Nemona said dismissively. "Please, do me a solid here! Do the presentation later, or designate someone else to fight for you, you can totally do that, R-right? Please!"
Lacey contemplated that for a minute, enjoying watching Nemona sweat harder with each second that passed. "Well… I suppose I could do that…"
A pathetic expression of naked hope formed on Nemona's face.
Lacey gleefully looked forward to crushing it. "But, seeing as how you ruined my quiz, I don't see why I should give you the satisfaction."
"No," Nemona whispered in denial.
"See you later," Lacey said with a grin, blowing Nemona a kiss as she walked away. "Have fun with Drayton!"
Cruel, mocking laughter echoed in her wake.
Nemona trembled, looking like she was either about to explode or burst into tears. Possibly both.
Arven sympathetically patted her on the shoulder. "There, there."
"I hate this school," she cried, bursting into tears as she hugged him. "I hate it so much."
"Me too, Nemona," Arven said comfortingly, glancing over her shoulder to shoot daggers at Crispin. "Me too. But look, at least you can pulverize Drayton before finally fighting Kieran, right? That'll be fun, won't it?"
Nemona sniffled. "Yeah… It will."
Drayton smiled and laughed. "I'm in danger!"
"Okay… Okay! I think I finally got it-" Kieran started to cry in elation, only for most of the key shaft to break off in his hands, leaving the rest stuck deep inside Amarys's back. "WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!"