"...you were right."

A question formed in the back of Suzaku's heart as he hopped off from a bus, unspoken but no less clear for it.

So he's going to make me say it.

"He… really did it. Prince Clovis is dead. You tried to warn me it would happen, and I completely blew you off."

…to be fair, One eventually replied, usually people would agree that NOT letting the disembodied voice in your head dictate your actions is the rational thing to do. And while he presented a possible opportunity for us to start making progress in our goals, it's not like he was anything more than just some evil rich guy to me. And we're working with Euphie now anyway, so… as much as you shutting me out back then pissed me off in the moment, it's kind of a moot point now.

Suzaku clenched a fist with one hand while using the other to readjust the canvas sack of spare clothes he'd just picked up from his old barracks. And Camelot doesn't have a base of operations set up in the Area yet either, so I guess that technically makes me homeless for the night. "Don't you get it? I'm an accessory to regicide now. And on top of that, I just betrayed Euphemia by lying to her about Lelouch and Nunnally and covering for him."

Scum like me–

A mental equivalent of a forehead flick interrupted Suzaku before he could take that thought any further.

Cut it out or I'll sue for gimmick infringement.

"Oh please," Suzaku scoffed, "I've been hating myself for far longer than I've known you."

But not for longer than I've been hating myself. Anyway, the upside is that I don't think your "role" in Clovis's death – such as it is – can reasonably be proven in court. Lelouch is still the one who broke into a G-1 Base, and it's still Lelouch who of his own will and mind pulled the trigger. Calling you an accessory when you fully believed he wouldn't do it is absurd… although Britannia at large wouldn't care. As for lying to Euphie… yeah, that sucked, but the alternative to that would have meant betraying Lulu and Nunna's trust in you by exposing their survival, so frankly the only winning move in that game was not to be caught playing it. Euphie being as Euphie is, I'm pretty sure she'll be happy to forgive you –

"Us," Suzaku corrected. "Even if she doesn't know we're two people, she likes you as much as she does me."

After a moment's thought, he amended that statement. "Actually, she might be more fond of you than she is of me, judging by her responses to your almost recklessly casual attitude."

A thick cloud of roiling emotions blossomed in Suzaku's heart as he continued his trek towards the parking garage Camelot's mobile HQ had temporarily set up in, but no further words were said. He must be having one of those moments where he wants to tell me I'm full of shit but he can't argue with the facts, Suzaku thought with a grin.

…ANYWAY, I'm pretty sure all we have to do is get Lulu and Nunna on the same page to at least tell Euphemia, then come clean with her and we should be good. Hell, Euphie in the anime was even okay with keeping Lulu's identity as Zero a secret.

Suzaku started to tell One he was missing the point, before shutting his mouth with a click as his eyes went wide with an empathetic realization. Damn, so that's what it feels like.

Suzaku let out a sigh in the cool August night air. "This afternoon, when Her Highness first wanted our input on how to deal with Sir Jeremiah… I couldn't think of anything at all. Even though she was right there, all but pleading for help…"

The newly-minted pilot stopped to lean against a long-closed storefront and stared at his hand in shame, before closing his eyes with a shake of his head. "My mind was just… blank. It was the same earlier, just before that, when I tried to stop you from taking the conversation further…"

Yeah, I noticed that too. Every canon version of you I know, you… you're pretty much a bump on a log that never really takes an initiative to chase after the things you say you want. You follow wherever life and your orders take you, and then when you don't like or agree with it, you hesitate and shit goes pear-shaped. …hell, your freakin' "hammer and anvil" speech from yesterday pretty much amounts to the same thing.

Suzaku chuckled. "If you're going to tell me I suck, then I should at least be allowed to agree with you." I wonder… is it because a part of me still hasn't accepted a will or desire to live? Or have I so thoroughly internalized the idea of being a powerless Eleven, like a weak child, that I just can't get a grip on the fact that life is changing…?

Dude… you're a natural born ace pilot. You've got superhuman athleticism. You have the strength and the ability to crush pretty much anyone who messes with you, and the kind heart to generally not do that. On top of that you've actually got great looks, and we've got three amazing ladies and counting all over you. You're a freakin' hero who saved civilians from terrorists yesterday in Shinjuku! Your suicidal tendencies and the general fucked-upness of your headspace don't make you suck; they're the only reason you're relatable instead of infuriatingly perfect.

Suzaku perked up in shock at the sheer envy in his partner's metaphorical voice. "That's…"

And as for me, well… for all intents and purposes, I might as well just be a cognitive parasite taking up residence in your mind and mooching off of your finer qualities to coast through life. And no, Suzaku, that's not just Impostor Syndrome talking – not when I'm actually an impostor…

Suzaku frowned as he looked back on the last two days, remembering how One had thrown one reckless gambit after another when Suzaku stalled. In trying to save them from Clovis's ire; in coming up with a plan to not only get Euphemia out of danger but to establish her presence as a dominant one; in pulling Jeremiah Gottwald out of an inescapable noose and into their alliance; and in raising the possibility of a security leak or even mole to the Area's terrorists.

"You're the furthest thing I can imagine from a parasite," he began as he got up from his resting place and started moving again. "You've made tangible, positive differences in the lives of the people around us, and likely for the stability of the Area at large. …and in forcing me to confront some of my demons and limitations, you're helping me. Even if we might frustrate each other sometimes, even if we're going through some growing pains, I feel confident in the belief that we're developing…"

Suzaku needed a moment to find the proper words for what he wanted to say. "A healthy symbiosis."

Eyes, lungs, pancreas; so many snacks, so little time…

Suzaku stumbled in surprise at the unexpected comment, even as a cavalcade of memories flickered across their mind to give him context for the joke. "Sheesh… you are without a doubt," Suzaku muttered with a chuckle, "the most unrepentant nerd I have ever met. Now c'mon, it's just another block or two until we get there."

It wasn't too much longer until we strolled up to the good ol' Camelot emergency deployment truck with all our worldly possessions on our back. Fortunately, the lights in the parking garage and in the rear cabin were on; unfortunately, the comparative desolation gives me the creeps.

You're just not used to city life yet, Suzaku explains. You'll grow more accustomed to it in time.

Here's hoping, anyway. Trotting up the fold-out steps, Suzaku looks around and spots Cecile dealing with some paperwork. "Private Suzaku Kururugi reporting," he announces with a salute. "Ready for debrief."

Cecile glances up at us, clearly a little tired, and offers a small smile as she returns it. "At ease. I'm sure you must've had a long day, so if it's alright with you we could drop the ceremony for now."

Suzaku nods, and… rather than actually make an effort to relax, just hands the steering wheel to my lazy ass instead. I unfold a metal chair and plop down in it next to Cecile. "Gotcha. So how's your day been, Miss Cecile?"

The bluenette beauty shakes her head with an amused breath, before going a step further to roll some tension out of her neck. "It's been a busy day," she remarks while leaning back in a comfy-looking chair. "And it looks like the next few weeks will be more and more of the same. We've arranged a deal with the Ashford family to rent out a wing of their nearby university, and obviously it will take some doing to get moved in and set up. On top of that, we've got a new prototype weapon for the Lancelot that needs to be tested; if things go as planned, a later variant of it could even reach limited mass-production... and all of that was before your abrupt call from Shibuya earlier almost gave us a heart attack."

The teasing lilt in Cecile's voice is enough to make me confident that she's not upset about it, but all the same I still feel like an ass. Just how much extra work did we make for her? "Uh… look, I'm really sorry about that–"

"No, you shouldn't be."

A soft hand on my chin drags my gaze up from the floor to meet hers. Her eyes are just so…

"From the way everything sounds, it just might be a miracle that you bumped into Princess Euphemia when you did and were able to save her. More importantly," she continues, "you both came through alive and mostly unharmed. A little extra work on my end is a small price to pay for one of my subordinates' safety, and for their success. Please don't ever forget that."

"I, ah…"

I swallow, keenly aware of how much I must look like a love-starved twit. …wait, look like? I've never had a romantic relationship in my life and I'm used to life hanging me out to dry; I am absolutely a love-starved twit.

"I'll try to bear it in mind."

Cecile's smile takes on… I almost want to say there's sort of a spark to it, but she lets me go and stands from her seat before I can put much thought to the matter. "There's still some leftover takeout from lunch if you're hungry," she offers. "I also made some fresh tea not so long ago, although I'm afraid it's a Britannian blend..."

I'd have been happy enough to go get it myself, but she's already heading for the truck's minifridge and I don't want to get in her way. "I just ate on the way back, but Britannian tea sounds great. I'd appreciate it."

All too soon, she comes back and hands me a cup of tea, before retaking her seat. "Official orders likely won't come in for another day or two, but it seems we're going to be working closely with Princess Euphemia for a while. …and in light of that," she solemnly adds, "there's something I wanted to discuss with you."

Hoo boy, is this about my inability to stop simping?

Cecile produces a file from her desk, and within seconds I can feel a shot of dread come in from Suzaku's side of our heart. Those are… my psych records.

"As your commanding officer," Cecile begins with a sigh, "I honestly should address this immediately. The contents of this record normally would mandate that you be transferred to a minimal-risk capacity such as a janitorial position, if not discharged from service immediately on grounds of being unfit for duty. The Britannian government and military go to great lengths in providing medical benefits and services… but do not grant the same care for those suffering from poor mental health, as you know. For you to have served this long tells me that your previous superiors deliberately ignored or overlooked these concerns."

The Emperor's policy of social darwinism, Suzaku explains.

I give the woman a grin, even knowing damn well it's as fragile as a wet paper bag. When in doubt, resort to sarcasm. "Well, of course! We can't go around putting the weak and feeble-minded in positions of importance or influence, can we?"

Cecile actually scowls at me for that; lesson learned, this is the worst time to be a smartass. "My apologies, that was completely inappropriate of me."

Cecile stares at me for a long moment, before heaving a sigh. "It… wasn't the best response one might have hoped for, no. Although," she adds after a moment's further consideration, "it may actually be a good sign that you can find some humor in this."

Neither Suzaku nor I have any clue of how to address that, so… we don't, and just let her continue.

"…as an officer," Cecile says again, "I should dismiss you."

I can tell there's a but coming in. But I don't want to risk mouthing off again.

"But as a human being, Suzaku; as someone who'd like to be a friend to you…"

Cecile leans over to place a hand on my arm, kind eyes piercing through me. "...and perhaps more than a friend in time," she adds, "I consider it a higher responsibility to support you and help you overcome this. And to fulfill my duty as an officer will cripple my ability to do that."

Cecile, you…!

I, I–!

Cecile watched sadly as the young man began to shake, tears welling up in his eyes. "I promise that I'm not going to make you tell me anything," she gently told him. "But I hope someday I can earn enough trust that you'll choose to confide in… oh!"

Before she could even finish her sentence, Suzaku had thrown himself into her arms, desperately clutching at her and crying into her shoulder.

The son of old Japan's last Prime Minister, who discovered his father's suicide and spent part of the invasion as a homeless child before joining the army that destroyed his homeland… Anyone would be wounded from that kind of trauma, she thought as she hugged him close, comforting Suzaku as best she could in his moment of vulnerability.

"It's going to be okay, Suzaku. I'm here for you..."

Eyes closed, Cecile remembered the unusually high brainwave readings when they'd first recovered him, followed by the fluctuating biometric responses in the Lancelot, and even the occasional but abrupt changes in his body language and behavior.

…possibly even wounded enough to create another personality as a coping mechanism.

The pair remained like that for several moments, with Suzaku clinging onto her for dear life and Cecile whispering soothing nothings in his ear.

Eventually, he started to pull away and Cecile released him. Picking up his all-but-forgotten cup of tea, Suzaku took a few steps away and stood at a distance from her, looking pretty much anywhere but at her. "I, ah… I totally fell apart there. Sorry about that."

"Please, don't be. It takes more strength to be honest with your pain than to run or hide from it."

This… this was progress, Cecile decided. Suzaku hadn't tried to make excuses or cover anything up; while it was true he hadn't necessarily asked for help with his demons or struggles, she felt that literally jumping on her offer of such was close enough to qualify. I should probably let him gather himself for a while. "So, how's the tea?"

"It's…"

Suzaku stopped himself and took another sip, deliberately paying more attention to it with her question in mind. "It's… it's fine, I guess. I mean, it's good and warm, I don't have any real problems with it –"

He's so nervous… hmm. I wonder. "I'm glad you like it, Suzaku. …if you don't mind my asking, how much do you know about Britannian relationship norms?"

The young man almost choked on his tea at the question, before admirably recovering.

"...not too much, I guess. Other than that the Emperor has had over a hundred consorts, most of them at the same time."

Cecile smiled and shook her head at that last quip. "Well, I suppose the short version would be to say that open relationships are more normal than closed ones. Just because you might become intimate with someone doesn't mean that you're closed off from pursuing other relationships – although I hope you're aware that lying to one's partners and cheating on them doesn't end well for anyone," she added with a pointed frown.

"Of course," Suzaku replied with an awkward chuckle. "I know what kind of loser I am; any woman that so much as gives me a second look, I'd try to treat 'em right the best way I know how to."

If my theory proves correct, then this one is… awkward and talkative, trying to hide an almost complete lack of self-esteem behind his sense of humor. "You're not a loser, Suzaku. You're an exceptionally talented pilot, with a demonstrated instinct for helping others even if it means putting yourself at risk. And unlike the vast majority of Knights in our country," she added with a teasing smile, "you can honestly even boast that you've rescued a Princess."

As Suzaku grew redder by the second, Cecile debated on whether she dared to keep going. When he swallowed and opened his mouth as if to try and downplay or debate her points thus far, she decided to go for the kill. "...and you're handsome, too."

The young man instantly sat down and tried to hide behind his tea. "...thank you," he eventually mumbled.

And he's almost fatally weak to compliments.

Cecile had suspected going in that helping to build Suzaku up and heal emotionally would be an involved process.

But she'd never dreamed that she could have this much fun doing it…

"So–" Suzaku swallowed, most likely reconsidering his choice of words, before Cecile blinked as she watched his expression become a little more distant and weary; his posture more rigid and straight.

Could it be a personality shift?

"I imagine that this is the part where I should be honest with you and admit that Princess Euphemia also… took a personal interest in me earlier. Isn't it?"

Knight rescues Princess, Princess falls for Knight. It's just like a fairy tale… or perhaps an anime, Cecile thought as she bit the inside of her cheek. Still, this was exactly the kind of thing that needed encouragement – and with the Princess's influence, it just might be possible to get Suzaku exempted from Britannia's mental health regulations; perhaps even some actual treatment, in time. "I appreciate your bringing it up, Suzaku. …if you don't mind my asking, what do you think of our new Viceroy?"

The young man, now seeming a bit more like the pilot Cecile had remembered guiding through Shinjuku a day before, took a moment to think about it over his tea. "I think… I think her lack of experience could honestly make for a rough start in moving the Area forward," he began, "but I respect her enthusiasm and motivation to succeed. She's bright and charming, and I look forward to supporting her as best I'm able to. I genuinely believe that the world is a better place for her being in it."

Cecile almost whistled. "That's quite the praise," she whispered.

An instant later, Suzaku met her gaze before she could look away. "Of course, that last part goes just as much for you, Miss Cecile. I don't know how I can thank you enough for your consideration regarding… everything. But for whatever it may be worth, you have my gratitude all the same."

After a heartfelt declaration like that, Cecile could only imagine how flustered she herself must have looked. Oh my… "And on the subject of other women," she added, "Miss Lubie's been quite interested in you as well. Although from how things have been today, she may not be quite as willing to share as I am; what are your intentions where she's concerned?"

You can't expect life to offer you everything you want, she thought with a frown. Even on generous days, there may still come a time when you need to make a painful choice and commit to it… Hopefully you can learn that sort of lesson now, while we're still in a comparative state of calm.

Suzaku paused, taking another sip of his tea. "...she and I need to have a talk about that kind of thing. Like you and I have been doing just now."

Well, at least he's given it some thought. That's better than I had been afraid of…

"...I realize this is on very short notice," Suzaku suddenly began, "but… I don't exactly have a place to stay right now, and hotels are kind of expensive. Do you have any suggestions as to where I might be able to go for the night, until I can–?"

Cecile warmly placed a hand on his, silencing him. "We have a few cots here in the trailer," she explained. "Miss Lubie is staying with her father in the Settlement, and Earl Asplund's catching up with his old mentor. You're welcome to stay here with me until we can get set up at the University, where we'll have at least a somewhat more permanent residence in the Area."

Suzaku's entire face lit up, and once again Cecile felt she was speaking with the awkward, vulnerable young man from earlier. "Thanks, Cecile. I… I really appreciate it."

Shibuya Settlement, Lubie Estate...

"It's been quite some time," Lloyd remarked as he watched a disgruntled Mariel walk up to her dad, kneel to hug him tight for a solid ten seconds, and then stalk off to her room. "...hasn't it, old boy?"

"It certainly has," came the distracted reply. "Do you know what's gotten into her?"

Baron Leonard Lubie had retired from a successful career of scientific innovation and engineering in the wake of an accident that had left him with a bad leg. Although only approaching the end of his forties, years of regret over the carnage wrought by his original work in developing the Knightmare Frame had seemingly aged him another decade beyond that.

Lloyd Asplund, of course, had little understanding of such concepts as guilt or remorse. "Boy trouble, as I understand it. She and Cecile seem to be in a tizzy over our new devicer, a strapping young Eleven… and to the lad's cre–"

"Japanese," Leonard cut in with a sigh. "You know better than that in my own home, Lloyd."

Lloyd recalled how Mariel had consistently been correcting him in a similar manner even at work, and shrugged. "Of course. I'll make more of an effort to keep the political compliance at work."

Limping with a cane into his kitchen, Leonard shook his head. "I can see that my daughter's love life isn't what you're bursting to tell me about, and I'm certain she'll be more talkative in the morning. Come out with it."

If facial expressions could project physical force, then Lloyd's grin would have shaken the entire world.

As it was, the words out of his mouth still made Leonard's blood run cold.

"After coming up empty for the last decade, I believe I've finally found a subject. Your old theories can finally be vindica–"

"I told you to leave that research dead and buried. I know it's worse than pulling teeth for you to connect with other people as human beings, but have you even once considered the damage you could cause from opening that Pandora's B– ah?"

In his panic and haste, Leonard had attempted to turn back to better chastise Lloyd and succeeded more in losing his balance than anything else… only to find that Lloyd had stepped forward to catch him almost immediately.

"Be careful there, now. Mariel isn't the only one who'd feel it if something happened to you."

Leonard stared at his protege in naked shock, even as Lloyd helped him limp to a seat. "...Lloyd, those were the most human words I've ever heard out of your mouth. Are you unwell?"

"Of course I'm sick," Lloyd quipped. "A sudden and severe case of sentimentality. We can only pray that I recover from it quickly."

Leonard snorted as he eased onto a comfy sofa. "Hmph, that sounds more like you. …all jokes aside, I have to insist that you abandon whatever plans you've made regarding that research. The world we live in can't be trusted to make anything worthwhile from it."

"...you once told me," Lloyd began, "that ignorance was the root of chaos and discord; that the discovery and dissemination of knowledge was our first and best torch for lighting a path through the dark universe, and therefore that the advancement of science could only be a good thing. You ask me now what consequences might arise from opening Pandora's Box…"

Lloyd paused for a moment, adjusting his glasses as they ominously reflected the dim light. "Let me ask instead how much worse it would be if someone truly ignorant should stumble onto it in my place. At the very least, you can trust I'll be cautious enough to ensure that I can keep advancing science afterward."

Leonard sighed into his hand, a decade's grief weighing down on him. "I was young and naive in those days. …although I'm not sure why you're trying to justify yourself to me when you've never cared about things like moral consequences."

"Of course not," Lloyd agreed as he made for the kitchen. "But Mariel cares – and playing along with her has tended to get better results in the long term. You still take your tea the same way as always, I presume?"

Leonard offered a quiet sound of agreement, digesting the revelation that his former student was apparently trying to make use of whatever warped thing passed for his conscience by outsourcing it. "Can you at least promise me that you're keeping Mariel out of this?"

"Of course!"

Leonard stared at the kitchen in surprise, hearing Lloyd actually sound genuinely offended.

"The integrity of the experiment demands that I restrict as many variables as possible," Lloyd explained… to his mentor's chagrin. "Not a soul in Camelot has any idea it's even taking place."