"Casey!", Cappie's voice shakes me from my daydreams as I feel myself get alert.
He comes over to me looking both relieved to see me and extremely upset at the same time.
"Oh hey?", I'm a little confused. "I thought you were gonna text me when you were here and I'd come out?"
"I was going to yeah, until I saw what happened to your car!", He looks so upset I almost feel like I can see smoke puffing from out of his ears.
I can tell how angry he is, trying to bottle it, trying to keep it under control while talking to me.
"Yeah it's… it's nothing Cap, really it's fine—", I shrug.
"Who the fuck did that?", He looks confused, clearly not caring about swearing in this crowded coffee shop right now.
I stand up now with my purse.
I guess I hadn't really thought about it, about what he was going to say when he got here and saw that someone had tampered with my tire… I probably should've factored that into me calling him. I was just more focused on getting the tire changed, I hadn't realized he'd probably notice someone clearly stuck something in it, that it wasn't just me running over a nail or something.
"Cap!", I sigh, giving him a roll of my eyes as I stand up. He still looks upset, his tall frame standing next to two small older ladies, one with a walker who was staring at him. "Let's go outside okay?"
I grab his arm and guide him outside the door to get out of here.
Okay… now I've just found another place in Cyprus I can no longer go. The list is getting pretty long now unfortunately. Before I found out I was pregnant and before I'd started to spend more time with Cappie I could go absolutely anywhere. It was weird how things changed. I mean… the betrayal from the Omega Chis today just proved that.
"Who would do this to you Casey?", He looks upset and confused. "Do you think it's Evan? Because if so I'm gonna—"
I cut him off because the last thing I need is any more fighting. I didn't want more drama. I needed to just ignore this.
"I don't know Cap!", I throw up my hands.
"You don't know who did it?", He shakes his head, the two of standing out here on the street, no one else really out here since it was kind of cold and was dinnertime anyway. "You have no idea?"
It was twilight now, the streetlights downtown here just turning on.
"I… ", I take a long pause to sigh, looking at his concerned face like he's just begging me to know what the hell is going on. I grab my purse from off my shoulder and pull out the crumpled piece of paper and hand it to him.
He takes it, looking at me a little confused but then he smooths it out, reading it as I say nothing.
"What the fuck!", He lets out angrily, throwing the note out into the air as it breezes down the street in the wind.
"You don't have to litter", I let out quietly.
"Casey…", He looks at me sadly, his breath showing in the cold, his eyes watering from the wind. "This isn't just some little prank! This is literally criminal! We could go to the police! Or... to the campus cops at least!"
"You hate the campus cops", I scoff at him. "Seriously, I don't even want to get into it alright?"
"You're right, this is something that's between our houses. If Evan was behind this I'm gonna fucking kill him!", Cappie looks so angry, like he's going to burst, pacing up and down the sidewalk a bit.
"Cap, please, it's fine. I just want to go home, I don't care about the stupid Omega Chis! I care more about… about this baby and everything to do with that and keeping my own peace!", I yell out now, matching his level of intensity, reaching the tone of his voice.
"I care about you and the baby more than anything Casey, but—", He lets out sincerely, calming down a bit at my words but still upset.
"Please", I hold onto his arm now. "Please promise me you won't go after Evan. It'll just cause me more stress. I don't even... I don't even know if it was him or not. But I don't want him anywhere near us anyways. Leaving it just shows that we're not stooping to their level and that we don't care".
"You don't care about being called a slut?!", He huffs. "That's just harassment Casey! And its untrue! More untrue than anything!"
I always know it's serious with him when he uses my full name.
"I know…", I sigh. "I know that it's not true. And I hate that people are saying it but…"
I trail off now, starting to cry.
The tears are kind of warm against my face in the crisp air.
I watch Cappie's expression completely change. He goes from angry to complete and utter concern for me in 0.2 seconds, pulling a complete 180.
"Fuck… C'mere", His anger has completely vanished, his devotement for how I'm feeling being more important, it taking precedent. He hugs me close now, bringing me into his chest, my head at a level where I'm right where his heart is. "I'm so sorry they did this to you".
I react to his embrace by leaning up on the tips of my toes, putting my arms around his neck and connecting my hands at the back of his head as I hold onto him tightly.
"It's okay, they're just immature idiots Cap. I have more important things to worry about obviously", I sniffle against him with a scoff.
We pull away from each other, my heart beating a little faster at his unexpected touch.
"I'm… I'm probably just more sensitive because of hormones maybe…?", I shrug. "I don't really know when that starts".
I wipe my tears away, off my cheeks as I use the sleeve of my sweater.
I see a realization come over Cappie, like a lightbulb going off in his head. He takes his black leather jacket off then, taking it to bring around me, letting me get both my arms into it. I happily take his gesture. I feel so cold right now that I can literally feel it in my bones. When I was out earlier in the day it was much warmer. The nights were cold now in the Fall.
"Sorry", he shakes his head slightly as he lets a sigh out and I can see him finally calming down now. "I should have given you my jacket right away, you need to stay warm. I was just so unbelievably angry Case…"
"I know", I nod, letting myself give him a bit of a smile.
His jacket was warm. And it smelled like him too, the fit of it completely oversized on me.
"Well uh…", Cappie smirks slightly, still shaking himself out of his rage, but I see a glimpse of his usual self for the first time since he got here. "Let's get this tire fixed then and we can get out of here huh?"
"Yes please", I nod, giving him a bit of a giggle which makes him smile.
"Alright. You wanna wait inside the cafe while I do it or…?", He asks.
"Um…", I bite my lip and sarcastically act like I'm thinking to myself. "The same cafe where you just had a bit of an unruly outburst Cap? No, I think I'll stay here".
I give him a laugh as he looks like he's kicking himself.
"Shit, sorry, I didn't mean to—", He starts, sighing.
"It's fine, really", I touch his arm for what seems like the 10th time tonight. "It's just… it's just because you care".
Our eyes meet, his seering into mine as he nods.
I take a deep breath in now, our eye contact intense and I can't understand why I feel the urge to kiss him right now. I sure didn't want to feel that. I shouldn't. Maybe it's the whole baby thing… the hormones and the fact that he's the dad? Yeah. I'll blame it on that.
"Anyways", I let out awkwardly. "I'm fine Cap, I'm warm now so… I'll just wait out here, I can help you do it even".
I give him a smile.
He looks me up and down, from my head to my toes and then he just laughs.
"Yeah… you don't really scream mechanic to me Case", He smirks, me giving him a playful glare as I put my hands on my hips. "But you can hold my tools if you want?"
"Yeah I think I can do that", I nod, laughing.
"I'm just going to go get them from my car. You wanna pop open the trunk so I can get the new tire out?", He instructs me.
"Yeah sounds good", I nod up and down, him giving me a smile and then walking to his car parked down the street.
I let myself let out a sigh of relief.
He calmed down tonight. Calmed down for me I think. Because he knew I didn't need it. Knew I didn't need drama.
Because I really didn't. I didn't want anything to do with any of them.
Really all I wanted to do was finally get home and have some dinner with Cappie and maybe watch TV with just him or with my little brother or with some of the other KT guys if they were around.
And how insane was that?
"So uh… you said the word baby Case", Cappie looks over at me from what he's doing, on his knee working on my car. "I… haven't heard you refer to it as that very much until now".
"Well…", I sigh, leaning against the store front of a boutique that closed at 6. And it was close to 7 now. "I'm 9 weeks now so… it sort of looks like it's sticking around Cap… the baby I mean".
He looks to me, giving me a bit of a laugh as I smirk at him.
"Well what did you think it was gonna do Case?", he laughs. "Vanish if you just wished it enough?"
He's speaking sarcastically now, so I cross my arms across my chest, giving him a bit of a glare.
"No Cappie", I sigh. "I meant… like miscarriage. I kind of… waited for that to maybe happen but I'm starting to get past the period where it most likely would".
His face turns completely serious now, what I'd said sobering him up as he stops working on my car for a moment.
"Oh you have?", He asks. Clearly he didn't know anything about pregnancy. I mean why would he? He's a 21 year old college guy. He just knew what I'd told him so far, that I felt like crap and that I was super tired. And he probably also knew that my boobs had gotten bigger even if he was too polite to say anything right now. "You're past the point where you'd lose it?"
"Well…", I look off for a moment and then shrug. "Usually if you're gonna miscarry then it's gonna be in the first 13 weeks… so… it's not exactly looking like anything is going to happen to it so far".
I sigh out, frowning a bit. I didn't want him to think that I was upset the that baby was doing well. I just… really didn't want to have to tell my parents. But… I also really hadn't wanted this pregnancy to change my life at school here and it ended up doing just that… and I was weirdly okay with it. So maybe it wouldn't be as bad as I thought with my parents.
"Well… uh…", He looks nervous, fiddling around with his tools a bit and then looking back up to me.
I have his jacket wrapped around me, it stopping mid thigh, the sleeves too long and the shoulders big on my smaller frame.
"That's good though right Case? The whole not miscarrying thing?", He shrugs like he's asking me how we should feel about this. Like if losing our baby, which was really just a small fetus right now, would be a good thing or a bad thing. He was sort of taking my cues right now for what to do with the baby. The problem is… I didn't have the answers. I didn't know if it was a good or bad thing that I was still pregnant, that nature didn't just take its course and realize that two college students that aren't even together have no business to have a baby right now.
"I… I don't know", I shrug. "I guess miscarrying was maybe a long shot anyways since I'm young and… haven't been drinking or doing anything like that, and have been taking my prenatals and trying to eat kind of healthy... when I'm not throwing up at least".
I realize that I'm sort of a walking contradiction. I wished for the baby to go away those first two weeks after finding out. I wished so badly that this was just all a bad dream. And yet I still took my prenatals, still read all about what to do and what not to do during the first trimester online, still kept the ultrasound photo at my bedside to stare at every night. So… I honestly didn't really understand how I felt either.
"Yeah", he nods up and down, giving me a slight smile.
"I don't know… I couldn't do the abortion but I thought maybe somehow the universe would just take care of this and I'd end up losing it but… it looks like it sticking in here", I laugh slightly, humourlessly though, mostly just because I don't know what else to do in this awkward conversation. I touch my stomach lightly, moving his jacket a bit to settle my hand across my skin tight pink tank top.
I feel Cappie's eyes settle on my still pretty flat belly and then he looks up to me, his eyes wide.
"Well you've been doing all the right things like you said… and I wouldn't ever wish for you to have to go through that Case, to lose it", He shrugs. "I don't even know what that fully entails but… its probably painful and… hard. It'll be okay with the baby, you'll be okay".
He looks serious, nodding to me, smiling a tiny bit. This is his supportive look.
That was the thing about hanging around with Cappie again. I knew him pretty well, knew what all of his expressions meant.
"How Cappie?", I let out as my voice cracks. "How will it be okay?"
I'm trying not to cry again.
He looks at me blankly for a moment, probably realizing he has absolutely no real evidence that it would be all okay.
"It will, because… because I'll be here for you through all of it… and so will Rusty and Ashleigh. And the guys at KT all love you", He says, speaking completely void of his usual joking. His comment about the KT guys makes my lips twitch up into a slight smile. "And your parents may be more supportive than you think. I… I think you probably need to tell them soon anyways Case. Since… like you said, this probably isn't going to go away".
He shrugs slightly and I sigh out loudly, sort of dramatically.
"I know that you're right Cap, it's just… hard to force myself to do it. And I don't want to go all the way back to Chicago right now in the middle of the semester to tell them... even though telling them in person would be better…", I groan. "I just know how disappointed they'll be, they already think I can't do anything right Cap. Already think that I'm just some ditzy sorority girl".
I roll my eyes now. My parents were sort of a sore spot for me. And to be honest…. they were for Cappie too. I knew that from being with him freshman year.
Neither one of us had the easiest relationships with our parents.
Just another strike in us likely being able to be good parents ourselves.
"You're definitely not just a ditzy sorority girl", He speak to me strongly, eyes low, I can tell him wanting me to take him seriously, wanting me to fully believe him. Then he breaks out into a smirk. "Seriously, take it from someone who has seen a lot of ditzy sorority girls Case… you're not one of them".
I narrow my eyes at him playfully as we both smirk at each other, him eyeing me happily, liking teasing me.
I'm pursing my lips closed, trying not to let him know I'm on the verge of smiling.
"Wow, great Cappie, talking about the girls you've screwed while we're having a conversation about our baby", I roll my eyes at him jokingly and then give him a playful cross of my arms until I finally cave and laugh at the way he reacts to me.
He grins bigger than ever before, blue eyes alive with mischief. They shine underneath the street light we're under.
"What?", I keep my arms crossed, wanting to know what had him smirking like crazy.
"Nothing", he shakes his head and then gets up from where he was kneeling beside the tire. He brushes off the dirt that's on the knees of his jeans. He's probably freezing but he doesn't say anything about it. Instead he just stands straight in front of me now, a few beads of sweat on his forehead from working. He gives me a shrug, cracking his hands. "Just… I don't think I've heard you refer to it as 'our baby'… ever".
He looks like he's trying not to smile but it's not exactly working.
I can tell he's looking to me for a response.
He wipes at at his forehead, messing up his scruffy cocoa colored hair a bit, in a way that makes me smile.
"Oh um", I shrug like it's no big deal in response to him. "Well it technically is our baby Cap".
I say like it's in scientific terms, my expression void of emotions.
"Technically?", He chuckles, eyebrow raised as he moves closer to me.
Him moving closer and closer to me just makes me more nervous.
More nervous, but more excited too.
And right now the excitement was winning out over the nerves.
"Yes okay", I roll my eyes a little too dramatically, throwing my head back so he can see my annoyance of him. "It is our baby Cappie, yours and mine. And it doesn't seem to be going anywhere and I don't… I don't know exactly what to do about it or how to feel about it".
I sigh in frustration, looking to the ground for a moment and when I look up he's even closer, just an arms length away.
"Mostly right now I just want to get out of here and get something to eat. I'm starving", I groan.
"Well the tires done, so I think I can make that happen Case", He grins devilishly.
I just stand in confusion.
"It's done? You just finished it?", I ask him.
"I was finished back when I told you I'd noticed you'd been referring to the baby as a baby recently", He confesses, giving me an awkward look.
"What?! Cap!", I open my mouth wide, letting out a squeaking noise as I swat his arm.
I'm annoyed with him but still the two of us can't help but laugh.
"We could've been out of here like, 10 minutes ago!", I argue, throwing my arms up. "I mean aren't you freezing?!"
"Yeah I am", He nods, shrugging, his warm breath still showing in the air, the night having taking over now as it's a bit darker than when he had first gotten here. It gets darker much earlier these days. "But… talking to you about the baby is important and… you're kind of in a position where you're held hostage with me right now. Any other time we don't… we don't really get to talk like this".
I narrow my gaze at him.
"I know I've probably made you mad but—", he starts but I stop him, having softened my expression, realizing that he only did this because he cares. Because he wants to be in the know, wants this pregnancy to be ours and not just mine. And to be honest… I probably hadn't been including him as much as I should've since we found out, hadn't given him enough credit for doing all the right things since we found out.
"I'm not mad Cap", I let him know, interrupting him, watching his worried expression turn lighter knowing that he hasn't upset me. "I'm actually… I'm more just sorry that we had to do it out here tonight because we were being forced to spend time together due to this whole tire situation".
I giggle now as Cappie nods, his usual smirk on his face.
"I should've been including you more in everything and I'm sorry Cappie", I let him know, looking at him softly. "I think it's just that… it took me this long to fully trust you again and realize that you actually do care and want to help".
"Honestly Case…", He let's out out a breath. "It's pretty much the only thing I care about right now. You and the baby".
"Okay", I look down, nodding and I can't help but smile, a blush coming over me too. I don't exactly want him to see but when I look back up at him I can tell he knows the impact his words have had on me. "I… I'm sorry and I'll let you in more so that we don't have to have conversations on the sidewalk in the cold… while it's getting pitch dark out and we're both starving".
Both of us laugh now.
"Cool, yeah", he nods quickly. "I would really like that. Y'know, I just… wanna be in the loop about the baby and about how you're feeling about it. So I can help in any way that I can".
"Thank you", I smile. "And… spending time with you actually isn't the worst thing ever anyways".
I jokingly shrug, reverting back to our usual playful interacting.
"Oh really? Because honestly you're kind of annoying with your stupid cheesy movies, your constant cravings for ice cream... not to mention drinking all the soda in our fridge and not telling anyone we're out. But…", he groans jokingly. "I'm willing to look past it".
"Cappie!", I laugh as I scold him, hitting my hand against his chest as he chuckles, loving to mess with me. "One, you liked the movie last night! Two, sorry ice cream is all I want to eat right now! And three, I'm only drinking soda because you got me pregnant and I can't drink anything else!"
I fire back, knowing I'm being fiery with him but also knowing that he likes it.
"Okay…", He takes a long sigh, still smirking cockily. "You're right, it mostly comes back to me getting you pregnant, so I can really only blame myself".
He shakes his head, still playing along.
"Exactly", I giggle. "One hundred percent your fault. But… I'll look past it".
I giggle some more, seeing him lick his pink lips, his whole expression mischievous.
"You will?", He grins, coming closer to me.
I feel the butterflies in my stomach going crazy at his closeness, feeling buzzy all over my skin.
"Mmm hmm", I nod up and down, being a bit more serious now. "I mean… last night wasn't absolutely horrible so…"
I shrug.
"Really?", He fakes surprise. "Well that's a pretty decent step for us right?"
I nod up and down slowly, trying to stifle in my laugh but it's no use.
"I thought us spending a night alone together would either end up with us trying to kill each other or….", I trail off as a naughty smile comes over my lips.
"Or fuck each other?", He speaks in a low growly whisper that makes me feel like that second option, the not killing each other option, is becoming more and more likely by the day.
But fuck! It shouldn't. It definitely shouldn't. Not with this baby to think about now.
Jesus. I certainly could see now how Cappie pulled so many girls in. He was good at it, the best I've met at getting you to give in to him. And I wasn't going to fall for it like the other girls. I couldn't now with the baby between us.
But we should be friends. I know we should. That's what would be good for the baby.
Right?
"Yeah…", I look up to his eyes, breathing out sharply, his closeness and what we're talking about making it hard to breathe right now. "That".
I nod up and down as I smirk at him.
"Funny how those are the only two options", He says with a laugh, making me give him a sheepish look.
"Well… after last night I realized there's a third option with us Cap. And… it's what would actually be best for the baby", I say more seriously now.
He nods, seeming all ears.
"Us being friends", I put it out there. "I think we can do that right?"
He looks me up and down for a moment, making my heart skip a beat, feeling warm with his coat wrapped around me.
"Yeah", He says finally, settling on it. "We can be whatever you want to be princess".
He grins mischievously again, his seriousness gone now.
"I told you not to call me princess", I narrow my eyes at him.
"Sorry, noted", He grins. "How about I take you somewhere fun to make up for it?"
My brows furrows in complete confusion.
"Go where? We both have to drive our cars home Cap?", I shake my head.
"Eh", Cappie shrugs and looks over to his car parked a little further down the street. "You said it yourself, my cars a piece of shit. I'll come back and get it tomorrow, no one's gonna try to steal it or anything. That is…"
He thinks to himself, I think coming up with one of his jokes. And… I'd like to say I wasn't enticed but… I'm all ears.
"If the Omega Chis don't leave a note calling me a slut on it by morning", he shrugs, making me giggle as we laugh together.
How is it that somehow only Cappie could make me feel better about what the Omega Chis did to me?
I feel my face hurt from all the laughing and smiling I'd been doing with him tonight.
"I mean, with me at least it would be kind of warranted because they'd be right", He continues to joke.
"Mmm", I shrug my shoulders, trying not to laugh as I want to play into the banter with him. "True. Although I think 'manwhore' might be the correct term to use for you Cap".
"Ooh", Cappie laughs, holding his hand against his chest. "Damn Case, you really know how to go for the jugular".
"Sorry", I hear myself giggle like a little kid. "It's sort of just the truth".
"Well", He purses his lips together, eyes bright. "Practice does make perfect, right?"
Fuck… he was right about that… Not that I've had much experience to relate it to at all. But being with Cappie in that way again a few weeks ago during that night, well I can see why he has his reputation on this campus for being the person girls chose to sleep with.
He leans into me, grinning, his expression, his words tonight, the way he'd helped me… just him. All of it was all too familiar and... dangerous. I didn't want to like him but I did. I really did. And soon I'd start getting a bump and soon I'd find out it's gender, and feel it move…. And I knew I'd only be feeling more and more for him.
"Let's just… go to wherever you want to take me", I narrow my eyes at him cooly, letting him know that this wasn't going to be happening tonight. Letting him know that yes, he was charming and charismatic and, fine, looked pretty hot right now. But he'd have to do a lot more to get me to consider giving him another chance. I wasn't like the other girls that were probably his usual prey.
I was too scared of him and me getting into a relationship period. But even more so now with the baby in the equation.
Things hadn't worked out before… so if we started something up again we'd probably end up breaking up and it wouldn't just send me into a depression like it did the first time in freshman year… it would affect the baby too. And… I had a responsibility to not let that happen to her or him.
"Okay, let's go, let's take your car now that it'll drive again", He grins, nodding and turning to go the few steps to my car.
"Wait! Cappie", I let out and he turns around to give me his attention.
"Yeah?"
"This surprise excursion you have planned… it better involve food of some sorts. Because if it doesn't I think I might actually throw a full on temper tantrum", I put my hands on my hips, giving him a look that says I'm totally serious.
"Don't worry, the excursion, as you put it, revolves around food. You need to eat and I haven't had dinner yet either", He nods, speaking seriously.
"Okay good", I nod. "Thank god".
I walk to the car now too.
"You know you're really starting to sound like a stereotypical pregnant woman Case", Cappie chuckles, teasing me.
"Don't say that, I'm just hungry!", I shoot him a glare.
"Okay", He puts up his hands with a laugh, letting me know he's certainly not going to argue with me and my slightly moody self right now. "Want me to drive?"
He offers.
"No it's okay, it's my car, I don't want you driving a million miles per hour in it like you usually do Cap", I give him a know it all look and then open my car door.
"I wouldn't ever do that with you in the car, don't worry. Who told you I do that?", He laughs.
"Rusty", I give him a smile meant to annoy him. "He said he thought he was going to literally die on your trip to buy groceries at Costco… mostly because your backseats have no seatbelts, but also because you drive like a complete maniac Cap".
"Dammit", Cappie shakes his head jokingly. "I'm going to have to have a serious talk with him about loyalty and allegiance to his brothers".
"Well I'm his sister so", I cross my arms happily, getting comfortable in my seat.
"Alright... you win", Cappie gives me a smirk and then walks around to the passenger side of the car.
I always win with you, I feel like saying. Because I couldn't really even think of a time when he'd ever said no to me.
"So…", I take a breath in, Cappie now in the car beside me, buckling his seatbelt. "Where to Cap?"
Author's Note:
Sorry this chapter was a tad short but I hope you enjoyed!!