Scully had just finished breast-feeding the baby, when Mulder came into the room.

"Hi," she said warmly, her whole face lightening up with a smile.

"Hi," Mulder said back, awkwardly looking at the bouquet in his hands. He came close enough to put it at the foot of the bed, next to Scully's feet, but then he took a few steps back. "How are you feeling?"

"Happy," Scully said simply. She didn't care that her body ached as if she would never be able to sit again. She was filled with joy and a new purpose in life.

"Come here, Mulder," she smiled, motioning towards the baby. "She doesn't bite."

But Mulder kept his distance. "I, um, need to talk to you."

"Can't it wait?" Scully was tired, weak and completely uninterested in anything other than her baby. "Don't you want to hold her?"

"No!" he said quickly. "I mean, I can't. Not like this."

"Mulder," Scully observed him carefully. "What's wrong?"

He looked well enough to her, freshly shaved and neatly dressed. Her mother had said he was doing fine, just being his usual reckless and passionate self. Skinner had said he wasn't in trouble, though not for the lack of trying. Bill had said he was an idiot, but her brother never liked her partner anyway.

Mulder was back and that was enough. Scully was sure his daughter would heal many wounds on his soul, just as she was doing for her. He just had to stop with his nonsense and hold her at last.

"My family, my childhood was ruined with secrets, shame and regret," Mulder said, looking at the floor. "I don't want the same for her. I want her to know everything she ever wants to know about me. I don't want to hide anymore… But I don't think I know how… It's the truth, Scully, but if I don't tell you now, I don't think I ever will."

"Ok," Scully yawned and closed her eyes for a moment, starting to feel annoyed. She was tired and he wasn't making much sense, but she tried to concentrate and give him her attention. "I'm listening."

She almost fell asleep before he finally started to talk again.

"I feel like I owe you an apology," he was looking at the ceiling now.

"For what?" Scully wondered.

"For the woman I met in a bar," Mulder explained. "When you told me you were pregnant. I was… I don't know what I've felt. Shock, perhaps. I wanted to… I don't know what I've wanted. It was too much to process. I went to a bar to get drunk and… Pick up a woman."

"Mulder, that's your business. Why do you feel you should apologize for it?"

"Because… Scully, you don't understand! I took her to my bed!"

"So, how was it?" Scully asked without a hint of jealousy in her voice. She knew by now that no woman could come between her and Mulder. She'd also realized how tense and uncomfortable Mulder always looked when somebody was trying to flirt with him, and she'd found out the reason for it, so she could understand how important that stranger from a bar must have been to him. She just wanted him to win at last.

"It was… wasn't…" he looked at the wall. "It was a disaster, Scully."

"I'm sorry," she said softly, meaning it with all her heart.

"Yeah," Mulder nervously turned his head towards the other wall. Scully sensed he wasn't done with his story, so she encouraged him to continue. "What happened?"

"I, um," he looked at the window, as if he was planning to use it for an emergency exit. "I've said another woman's name. Your name."

"That's bad," Scully agreed, still showing no judgement. "Is that what you are apologizing for?"

"No… Should I?"

"Of course not! We spend so much time together that it's only natural to make a mistake like that. I recently accidentally called my brother 'Mulder' and he almost denounced me."

"Yeah," he finally managed to look at her direction, but still avoiding her eyes. It was still too much, so he shifted his gaze to the baby. "But it wasn't a mistake. I was… calling for you. Not in… passion. It was a call for help."

Scully couldn't suppress a smile. It was so sad, but sweet at the same time. "Don't ever apologize for asking for my help."

"That's not what I'm…" Mulder sighed with frustration. "I made it all about me! You just got pregnant, another life was growing inside of you, and all I could think about was me and my… problem."

"But it didn't solve your… problem, did it?"

"No…"

"Did she get mad?"

"No, the opposite, actually. She asked me who Scully was…"

"And what did you answer?" Scully asked since it seemed like Mulder forgot to continue, lost in thoughts.

"I've told her you are my partner and she became very kind and… understanding."

"Really?" Scully was finding that hard to believe.

"Yeah," Mulder confirmed. "She tried to assure me that there was nothing wrong with me and started encouraging me to, um, come out of the closet."

"To… what?!"

"She assumed you were a man and I couldn't convince her otherwise."

"A man?" Scully raised her eyebrow. She pictured a woman, a young and attractive one, lying half-naked in Mulder's bed… And him, calling out a name of his, apparently male, partner in the heat of the moment. Scully cringed at the thought, but it also made her giggle. She couldn't help it, even though laughing was painful.

Mulder chuckled as well, realizing the humor in the awkward and embarrassing situation. But then the tears came and he closed his eyes in an effort to stop them.

"I'm trying to say…" he tried to say.

"I know what you're trying to say," Scully said. "But now you know the reason of your fear. You can work on it, get help, talk to a professional…"

"I can't…" Mulder looked at the floor, "…talk about this. I don't… want help."

"Not even if it includes drilling your head?" Scully asked teasingly, trying to lighten the mood.

Mulder chuckled, but didn't answer.

"Not even mine?" she asked seriously.

He finally looked at her, showing her all the depth of his pain in his eyes. He was like an open book, a tragic and sad book, yet captivating, the book that makes you cry your heart out, but you can't put it down and you never want it to end. Scully wanted to pull him close, kiss his forehead and wipe his tears, hold him tightly enough to feel his heartbeats…

But she couldn't get up and go to him, and he still wasn't ready to come to her.

"I almost did it," he said. "Once. But only because she was a vampire and I thought she wanted to drink my blood. I was in a very bad place and being seduced by a vampire fit perfectly in my self-destructive mood. When I realized that she wasn't hungry… I freaked out and it didn't happen…"

"A vampire?" Scully raised her eyebrow. Just when she thought he couldn't surprise her anymore…

"I had proof," Mulder insisted. "But she got blown up and I was left with nothing."

"Well," Scully didn't have the strength to try to explain to him that vampires don't exist so she just went along with it. "I'm sure there's someone out there for you. One day you'll find yourself a lovely lady with grey skin and green blood who will make you happy."

"I think I already found her," Mulder said, looking at the baby. "Can I hold her?"

"I thought you'd never ask."

Finally, with his heart and soul a little lighter, Mulder was ready to meet the new woman in his life. She was so light, tiny and perfect. One of the very few things Mulder didn't believe in was love at the first sight, Scully's baby proved him wrong.

His baby as well, he reminded himself. It was a moment that made all his suffering worth it in the end.

"Does she have a name yet?" he asked Scully.

"Elizabeth," Scully said. "After your mother."

Mulder looked at the child, trying to associate her with the name.

"Well, hello, Betty," he smiled.

Not Teena, Scully noticed. She didn't say anything, but she loved his choice of a nickname.

"Elizabeth Thelma," she announced proudly. "After my grandmother."

"E. T. Scully," Mulder smiled teasingly. "How appropriate."

"Well," Scully smiled. "I was leaning more towards E. T. Mulder."

"Oh no," Mulder shook his head playfully. "I want those initials next you your name."

Scully chuckled, but then got serious again.

"I've always been daddy's girl," she said. "Every little girl should be. I wouldn't have wanted to grow up with any other name than my father's. I want the same for her. Unless… You don't want to give it to her."

"Of course I do," Mulder couldn't have agreed faster. "I'm honored and I appreciate the offer, but… It's not exactly fair, Scully. Your mother had your father's name, too. You grew up with the name of the woman who gave birth to you and raised you. I want the same for Betty."

"Mulder, I'm not taking your name."

"Then I guess I'm taking yours."

He wasn't even joking. The name of the father who wasn't even his real father didn't mean much to him.

"Fine," Scully sighed. "How about Scully Mulder, then?"

"Sounds like a fair compromise," Mulder agreed.

"Yeah," Scully smiled. "It does."

Betty started to whimper in complaint, but nobody asked her what name she wanted to get.

"You know," Mulder said out of nowhere. "I'm kind of glad she wasn't a boy, like we expected."

"Why?" Scully asked.

"I don't think I could handle another William Mulder," he explained. "Or another William Scully, for that matter."

"What makes you so sure I would've called him William?" Scully was amused. She never chose the name for the boy, not daring to fully believe in the miracle that was growing inside of her. She was too busy making sure nothing was wrong with him.

"Wouldn't you, though?" Mulder assumed.

"No…" Scully shook her head. "I don't think so."