Chapter 31-We'll Get Through This

It was over before anyone even knew what was happening.

The first thing Hank was aware of was the smell of smoke. He tried to open his eyes, but his head was throbbing. 'Concussion?' he thought. As he tried to sit up, the pain in his chest sent him right back down to the ground. He laid there for a little while longer. Where was he? What happened?

A few moments later, he faintly heard someone calling his name. "Sarge? Sarge? Are you ok?"

He forced his eyes open, and he saw Hailey kneeling over him.

"Sarge, can you hear me?" she asked.

"Yeah," he choked out. "What happened? Where are we?"

Hailey looked down at him, panicked. "You don't remember?"

Hank closed his eyes again, trying to remember what came before the darkness and smoke. Finally, it came back to him.

The unit rushed into an abandoned warehouse, prepared to bring members of a murderous drug ring to justice. They'd spent the last few days working extremely hard to connect the dots enough to make a plan and put it into motion. The day had come, and they were confident the execution of the plan would be flawless.

Unfortunately, the plan wasn't as flawless as they believed.

Hailey helped Hank sit up, and he immediately took in the scene around him. Half of the warehouse had been reduced to a pile of rubbish. He saw flames coming from the other side of the building, and suddenly, he was overcome with fear about the rest of his unit.

"Bomb?" he asked Hailey.

"I don't know. It kinda looks like it." She helped him to his feet, and he clutched his chest. "Are you ok?"

Hank waved her off. "Cracked ribs maybe. You?"

"Scrapes and bruises. I called it in, so hopefully we'll get some help here soon."

"Let's go find the others."

Hank and Hailey made their way around the debris, trying to locate the rest of the unit. Antonio and Al were banged up, but they appeared to be ok. They helped move debris off of Kevin and Adam, who both needed medical attention for burns and possible broken bones. While Al stayed with them to wait for the paramedics, Hank, Hailey, and Antonio went off in search of Erin, Jay, and Kim.

Afraid to enter the building without the assistance of the fire department, they made their way through the debris calling for their missing team members. Every second without a response sent fear coursing through Hank's veins. Where were they?

As they made their way around to the side of the building that was on fire without finding the others, they took a moment to prepare themselves. Their missing team members had to be inside, and if they didn't get them out soon, they wouldn't find them alive.

"I'll go in," Antonio said.

"Not by yourself," Hank said.

Hailey shook her head. "The rest of the building is going to come down. Neither of you can go in."

"We can't leave them behind, Upton!" Antonio said.

As they heard someone yell "Hey!", they looked up to see Jay and Kim running out of the building cradling an unconscious Erin. Hank was momentarily overcome with relief until he realized that she was badly injured. Kim was putting pressure on Erin's head wound, and Jay was begging Erin to stay with them. Hank, Hailey, and Antonio rushed over to help, and as Jay laid Erin down, an ambulance drove up.

"The ambo is here, Er. We're going to get you taken care of. Just hang on." Jay kissed the top of her head. "I love you, Erin. You did so good in there, but you're not done, so I need you to stay with me. Please, Erin please stay with me."

Before the paramedics reached them, Hank knelt next to Erin. "It's going to be ok, kiddo. Hang on for us, ok? We need you to fight, please. You can do this."

They all stepped back to let the paramedics work. "I'm going with her," Jay said, looking up at Hank.

"We'll meet you there," Antonio said.

As they watched Erin being loaded into the ambulance, Al put his hand on Hank's shoulder, knowing what he was feeling. "Come on. I'll drive you there. Call your wife."

As they drove, Hank pulled out his phone, his finger hovering over Jenna's name. He knew he needed to call her, but he didn't know how to say the words. If he had to say it out loud, it would make this entire catastrophe become more real. He looked over at Al.

"Will you talk to her? I don't think I can do it," he asked.

"Whatever you need, Hank."

He clicked on Jenna's name and handed the phone to Al. Al wasted no time informing Jenna of what just happened. She tearfully promised to meet them at the hospital. As Al handed the phone back to him, Hank softly said, "I don't know if I can walk into that hospital."

"Lindsay needs you. You'll do it for her."

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When they arrived at the hospital, they were all taken to exam rooms to be evaluated. Jenna arrived, and she nervously sat in the waiting room, hoping for news and praying for healing for all of them. Al wasn't specific about injuries during his phone call to her, just telling her that there were multiple injuries and she was needed at the hospital.

After what seemed like an eternity, Hailey joined her in the waiting room. Jenna immediately jumped to her feet, hugging Hailey, relieved to see that at least someone was ok. Hailey jumped, surprised by Jenna's hug.

"Sorry," Jenna said, releasing her. "I've just been scared out of my mind, and I'm glad you're ok."

"It's ok. It's good that you're here."

"Do you know anything about the others?" Jenna asked.

Hailey shrugged. "It all happened so fast that I didn't really get to take in any of the injuries. I know Adam and Kevin needed medical attention for sure. Sarge thought he might have cracked ribs, so I assume he's being x-rayed. Erin, she…Jenna, she was pretty seriously injured. I don't want to say too much because we don't know anything, but I do know that she got the worst of it."

"Oh. Ok," Jenna said, wiping at the new tears rolling down her face.

One by one, Antonio, Al, and Kim were released to the waiting room with only minor injuries, nothing requiring hospitalization. Jenna was relieved, but she desperately needed to see her husband. The wait was killing her.

Finally, Hank walked into the waiting room. Jenna ran over to him, relieved to see that he seemed to be fine. She wanted to throw herself in his arms, but she was afraid she would hurt him. She took his face in her hands, pressing her forehead against his.

"You're ok," she whispered.

Hank gently kissed her forehead. "I'm ok. Bruised ribs and some scrapes and bruises, but I'm fine."

"Good," Jenna said, gently wrapping her arms around him, desperately needing to hold him, at least for a moment. When she pulled back to look at him, she quietly asked, "Any news on Erin?"

Hank shook his head. "Come out in the hall with me." He took her hand and led her out of sight of the rest of the unit.

"What's going on?" Jenna asked.

Hank stood against the wall, leaning over and putting his hands on his knees. Jenna rubbed his back, fighting back tears. Finally, he stood back up.

"This is bringing back memories, isn't it?" Jenna asked.

Hank nodded. "Justin was in this hospital. He died in this hospital. I just…don't know that I can do this."

Jenna took him back in her arms, and they held each other for awhile. Her heart broke for him, knowing his was in a kind of pain she would never understand. He took responsibility for anything that happened with his unit, and she assumed he was probably blaming himself for whatever went wrong. He was also probably holding himself completely responsible for Erin's injuries.

Jenna was right. As Hank let himself be held by her, all he could think about was how he didn't deserve her love or comfort. While he didn't know exactly what happened or exactly where their intel went wrong, he was ultimately responsible for the mistake that led to his entire unit being injured. He could handle his own injuries, but his primary job was making sure everyone went home safely at the end of the day, and he had at least three that may not go home, including his daughter.

They were interrupted when Antonio stuck his head out of the waiting room to talk to them. "Jay and the doctors are here with an update on Erin."

Hank and Jenna immediately rushed back in.

"How is she?" Hank asked.

Jay's brother Will began the update. "Erin suffered a serious head injury. We are extremely concerned about trauma to the brain. We have detected some bleeding, so she's being prepped for surgery right now. We hope to have more information for you soon, and we'll keep you updated about her progress."

"Will you be in there with her?" Jay asked.

"Yeah, I'll be in there. She's in good hands Jay," Will said.

"Thank you," Jay said, fighting back tears.

When Jay was gone, Jenna rushed over to him, hugging him. "She's going to be fine," she whispered.

"I hope so."

"Are you ok?" she asked.

Jay nodded. "Just banged up a little. I should've…it should've been me, not her."

"Don't do that to yourself."

As Jenna comforted Jay, Hank paced the floor at the back of the room, his mind racing. Erin was hurt, worse than he imagined. How had he let this happen? Why did he let her go into that warehouse at all? When he took her into his home, he promised to look out for her, and he failed, horribly. He was immediately overwhelmed with anger, not just at himself but for whoever was responsible for the blast. While he knew there was nothing he could do to help Erin, he knew that he and the unit could figure out who did this, and once they did, he would make them pay severely for hurting his daughter.

He made his way back over to the rest of the unit. They all looked at each other uneasily, recognizing the look of rage coming over their sergeant's face.

"Ruzek and Atwater have to stay to get their injuries further evaluated, but everyone else, head back to the district now," Hank said. "We have to figure out how this happened, and we have to nail these guys. Let's go."

As he started walking away, Jenna called after him. "Hank, I don't think anyone wants to leave right now, at least not until Erin gets out of surgery. Can't work wait?"

Hank whipped his head around to face Jenna. "Exactly who do you think you are?! Huh?!"

Jenna remained silent as he glared her. She had never heard him speak like this to her, and she didn't like it at all. She knew he was hurting, but she did not appreciate him yelling at her like this.

"Are you running Intelligence?! Because I thought that was my job, and I don't need you to tell me how to do my job! So stay out of my way and let me figure out who did this!" He turned to the others. "Let's go! Now!"

Jay stood up. "Sarge, with all due respect, I'm not leaving this hospital, not until I know for sure that Erin is going to be ok."

"Halstead, I gave you a direct order, and I expect you to follow my order!" Hank yelled.

Jay shook his head. "Hank, I'm not leaving Erin."

"Then you're out of Intelligence, effective immediately!"

"Then I'm out! She's more important than any job, and I thought she was more important to you too!"

Hank looked around the room at all of them, his wife, his unit, his family, before storming out. Reluctantly the others followed him out of the hospital. They each paused at Jay and Jenna before leaving, offering their encouragement and asking to be kept updated. When they were gone, Jenna walked over to Jay, giving him another hug.

"Erin is going to be ok. We'll get through this," Jenna said.

"I hope so. It was just…it's bad, Jenna."

"I know. But she's so strong, Jay. She has so much to live for, and she's a fighter. She's going to be just fine."

Jay sighed. "I appreciate your optimism," he said as they sat down in the waiting room chairs. "Jenna, are you ok? After what just went down, very publicly, with Sarge?"

Jenna looked down, taking a breath before meeting Jay's eyes. "I don't know. I just…I knew he had that in him. People warned me, and he even warned me, but I've never seen it, and I've sure never had it directed at me. But I know he's trying to cope with what happened, and he's trying not to feel any of this."

"Still. That's no excuse for treating you that way. Don't let him get away with it. You don't deserve that," Jay said, shaking his head.

Jenna gave a tiny smile. "Oh, I guarantee that he won't get away with it. But he gets a pass for a little while until Erin is out of the woods."

Jay put his head in his hands as tears came to his eyes. "She's going to pull through this, right?"

"Jay," Jenna started.

"I can't lose her, Jenna. I just…can't."

Jenna put her hand on his shoulder, tears coming to her own eyes. "I know, Sweetie. All we can do is be here for her."

Jay nodded, wiping at his tears. "Thanks Jenna."

Jenna closed her eyes, saying a silent prayer. She was hurting, just like Hank and Jay, and if they lost Erin, she didn't know how they would recover.

Jay and Jenna sat in silence for the next few hours, waiting, hoping, praying for a miracle that they so desperately needed.