Beta-read by Pure Red Crane and Izzu
*Cha-La Head-Cha-La begins playing in the background*
SilverXSilver: Last time on Silver Ball Z!
Two years following the grand spectacle of the 23rd Paramount Marineford Martial Arts Tournament, the era of tranquility is abruptly shattered by the sudden arrival of Monkey D. Luffy's brother Shinpachi, revealing Luffy's alien heritage and intent to conquer the Grand Line. In an unexpected alliance, Luffy joins forces with Sakata Gintoki to challenge the alien threat. In the end, both sacrifice themselves to defeat Shinpachi and are sent together to the Otherworld. But the trouble is far from over, as the appearance of Takasugi and Kamui brings the Grand Line to the brink of destruction and the loss of many dear friends. But in the end, after rigorous training with King Hyo and racing across Snake-Way, Luffy and Gintoki rise to the occasion to defeat the invaders in a battle that sets off a chain of events leading to even greater challenges.
Soon after, Luffy, Gintoki, and the S-Warriors journey to Planet Wano to gather the Silver Balls to revive their fallen friends. There, they encounter Kaido, the intergalactic tyrant responsible for the destruction of the samurai, who is also seeking the Silver Balls to make himself un-immortal. They are joined by the time-traveling android samurai Momonosuke and Kin'emon, who come from the past bearing grim tidings of Kaido's looming threat.
Luffy engages Kaido in battle while Gintoki faces off against Takasugi, who unveils a terrifying new power. Meanwhile, the S-Warriors spread out across Wano in a race against time to gather the Silver Balls and bring their allies back to life, setting the stage for a climactic showdown. In an epic confrontation, Luffy transforms into a Super Pirate while Gintoki transforms into a Super Diabetic!
Can their incredible new powers secure victory against Kaido and Takasugi?
Will their comrades succeed in gathering the Silver Balls in time to fulfill their wish?
Will the S-Warriors be able to reclaim the future of Wano and the rest of the universe? Find out today!
…
…
…
Shinpachi: HOLD ON A DAMN MINUTE!
Gintoki: Eh? What's the problem, Shinpachi?
Shinpachi: What do you mean, 'What's the problem'?! What the hell is this recap?! None of this actually happened! Well, it did happen, but in a completely different anime!
Gintoki: Well, the story wasn't getting a lot of attention to begin with, so we decided to spice things up by including some small changes.
Shinpachi: Small my ass! This is a completely different story now! Besides, we already pulled this crap in the prologue for the Final Movie!
Kagura: It's fine-aru. We were basically ripping off Oda-sensei to begin with, so what's the harm? We might as well just change the story from here to make it more interesting and have the first half be the prologue.
Shinpachi: We can't do that! We certainly can't do that! It would completely destroy the narrative! What about all the newly established lore the author already added?! What about the story with you and Momonosuke-kun?!
Gintoki: Eh, it'll work itself out somehow. I'm sure he'll like being an android in the new story.
Luffy: I don't really get what's going on, but becoming a Super Pirate sounds really cool!
Shinpachi: Eh?! Luffy-san?! How did you get in here?!
Gintoki: Oh? You like the idea, do you? Being a Super Pirate means you get a cool transformation: your hair gets all spiky and golden, and you'll be able to shoot energy beams out of your hands.
Luffy: What?! That's awesome!
Shinpachi: No, Luffy-san! Don't let this guy tempt you!
Kagura: You're just mad you got the Raditz treatment-aru.
Shinpachi: That's aside the point! And why am I Raditz anyway?! Why am I the first one that gets killed?!
Gintoki: Oh, zip it already, Shinpachi. Just be glad we didn't make you Yamcha. You're lucky that spot was already taken by Zura.
Goku: Hey, don't go insulting my friend like that. Sure, he's had some bad luck in the past, but things have been really going well for him since his baseball career picked up.
Gintoki: Eh? Goku? What the hell are you doing here?
Goku: This isn't something I normally do, but I'm supposed to deliver a letter from Toei Animation saying that you guys can't do this new story. Sorry about that.
Gintoki: The hell is that supposed to mean?! This is Fanfiction, dammit! They got no authority here!
Goku: I'm just the messenger. They said that if you try to implement these changes, they will take legal action, something called 'copyright litigation.'
Luffy: What the heck is that? Do you know, Spiky Hair?
Goku: Not really, but I doubt it's anything good.
Gintoki: Tsk! Fine, dammit! We'll just go back to the original story! Are you happy now?!
Luffy: Aww, but I wanted to shoot energy beams!
To Akira Toriyama-sensei (1955-2024),
The Man Who Made Dumb and Crazy Fanfics Like This Possible
Lesson 13: Money Can't Buy Happiness, But It's More Comfortable to Cry in a Sports Car Than on a Bicycle
"Straw Hat Gentleman! Silver Haired Gentleman!"
"Hmm?" Luffy and Gintoki turned simultaneously toward the call to them. Kneeling on the floor behind them was the same old man that Luffy had helped out earlier in the day during the whole hippo incident. At present, they were at the far end of the quarry, busting up stone as part of their labor for the day.
"Old Man Hyo?!" one of the prisoners shouted in surprise when he saw the usually dignified older inmate bow his head to the two newbies.
"I must express my deepest gratitude for the heroic way that you two rescued my humble and unworthy hide!" Hyo thanked the duo.
"You really ought to just direct that thanks toward the rubber brat here. Aside from beating the crap out of that hippo, I didn't do much else." Gintoki said, nodding towards Luffy.
Luffy simply flashed a cheerful grin at the old man. "Hey, don't sweat it. I had business with that hippo anyway."
"Oh..." Hyo slowly lifted his gaze as Luffy began to approach him, extending a hand filled with meal tickets.
"Here, have these."
Hyo's jaw practically hit the floor. "Meal tickets! B-but they'll find out!"
"You can't work on an empty stomach." Luffy insisted.
"I... I will treasure these! Thank you, sir! Thank you, sir!" The old man thanked him repeatedly as he accepted the tickets, each time bowing in gratitude as he backed away.
"What a funny guy!" Luffy laughed.
POOF!
In a sudden puff of smoke, Raizo appeared behind a pile of stone, his large head concealed behind a scarf. "Luffy-dono!"
"Raizo! What's the update?" Luffy rushed over to greet Raizo as the ninja grabbed a pickaxe and began hammering at the stone to better blend in. Gintoki stayed on his side of the pile, continuing his work without much care as he listened in.
"Forgive my lateness. I located the cuff's key, but it's under tight security," Raizo shared. "Guarded and encased in a seastone box. Fear not—I shall secure the key, though it will take time."
"Sounds good. I know you'll figure something out." Luffy said.
"I don't see how he's gonna be able to sneak in, though. The guy looks like he's only a hoverchair away from going off to destroy Captain America and the rest of the Avengers," Gintoki pointed out sarcastically. However, he was quickly silenced as a shuriken whistled past his face, barely passing by his nose as it embedded itself into the stone beside him.
"Silence, knave. This conversation does not concern you. If it weren't for the fact that your sudden death would raise too many alarms, I would strike you down here and now." Raizo sternly warned before turning his attention back to the pirate captain. "I promise you, Luffy-dono. I shall have you freed soon."
With another smoke screen, Raizo vanished once more, leaving the samurai and pirate duo to themselves.
"Seems like everyone's in a piss-poor mood with me lately," Gintoki grunted as he rubbed his nose, checking to see if everything was still there.
Luffy turned back to his work, his expression becoming unreadable again. "Well, after all that stuff you said back at the castle, what did you expect?"
"Got me there," Gintoki conceded. A quiet moment passed between them, the only sound being the clang of their tools against the rock until Luffy broke the silence.
"Hey, Permy…"
"It's Gintoki, you brat. Seriously, when are you gonna get my name right?"
"When will you?" Luffy countered.
"...What is it?" Gintoki sighed, moving the conversation along.
"Why did you say all that to Momo, anyways? All that stuff about Wano not needing him anymore? I know he can be a crybaby, but however you look at it, this country needs him more than ever."
"I was just saying it like it is. He disappears for twenty years and thinks he can waltz back in like nothing happened? Did he think everything would be forgiven just because we were classmates? Well, I hate to break it to you, but a lot did happen. I did my part and lost a lot of good buddies during the war. And I'm not the only one. You'll find plenty of bitter bastards like me all over the country who have given up on the Kozuki."
His answer was as cold-hearted as it was sound. Luffy understood that. But even so…
"Is that really it?" Luffy questioned.
"Huh?" Gintoki's eyes narrowed.
"Is that really the only reason you had for pushing him away?" Luffy didn't let up, his look stern.
There was an unsteady tension building between the two as they continued to stare each other down, waiting to see who would turn away first. However, their standoff was abruptly cut short by a creepy laugh approaching them from behind.
"Hey, boss! Kehihihi! How about sharing a ticket with me? A little dango for those in need?" They turned to see who had joined them: a tall man with dark skin and shoulder-length hair, distinguished by a greasy forelock, an elaborate beard curling upwards, and a long tongue protruding from his unsettlingly upturned mouth. His attire consisted of a long-sleeved shirt that concealed his arms, with his presence of hands indicated only by the sea-prism stone handcuffs clamped around his wrists.
Gintoki raised an eyebrow. "Who's this? And why does he look like the kind of guy that ought to be kept 50 yards from a playground?"
Luffy scowled as he recognized the inmate as the man who tried to bump off his crew and kidnap Shirahoshi. "Caribou! I'm not giving you anything. You want something, work for it!"
"Come on, boss. Don't be like that! These cuffs are supposed to let you work, but I'm practically useless here. I'll pledge my loyalty to you for some dango. Plus, I've been here way longer than you. I've got plenty of juicy intel."
The New World rookie suddenly closed the distance between himself and the duo as he rubbed up against them. "You two are trying to fly the coop, right? Come on, take me with ya! I'll do anything! If the three of us teamed up, nobody could stop us!"
Gintoki wrapped his hand around the pirate's face, trapping it in an iron grip as he lifted the now-floundering Caribou off the ground. "First of all, don't just randomly rub up against people like that. Everyone's got a bubble."
He tossed the man across the ground before staring him down with his usual dead fish eyes. "Secondly. I hate to break it to you, but there's no 'us' in this plan. Any escape that's happening is with him and him alone," Gintoki said, jabbing a thumb at Luffy.
Luffy frowned at this before turning back to Caribou. "If you wanna escape, just team up with Jaggy instead."
Caribou quickly recovered, smiling as if nothing happened as he continued his suck-up routine. "Nah, trust me, his reputation's in tatters now after he tried to take a swing at Big Mom. The guy ended up losing an arm, and the rumor is he fled in shame!"
"Rumors? Why are you wasting your time with that crap?" Luffy scoffed.
KATHUNK
"AIEEE!" Caribou screeched as the flying pickaxe embedded itself in the wall, just barely missing his face. Now approaching was Kid himself with an aggravated look on his face, having clearly overheard the conversation.
"K... K... Kid!"
"I've never tried to go after Big Mom. All I did was wound one of her generals and take what I meant to take!" Kid corrected before glancing at the stump where his left arm used to be. "And I lost my arm here in a battle with the Red-Hair Pirates before all of that."
Kid turned back to Caribou, fixing a withering glare on him. "Got any more myths you need dispelled?"
"No!" Caribou answered hastily. After holding Caribou's gaze a moment longer, Kid shifted his focus to Luffy, stepping closer with a defiant shout.
"And let me be clear! The one who gets famous for killing Kaido will be me!"
"No, it'll be me!" Luffy quickly became outraged as he, too, got up to Kid's face to make his declaration known. Caught between them was a paling Caribou and a mildly annoyed Gintoki.
"Hey, what are you four doing!? No slacking on the job! Get back to work!" The overseer, now noticing the growing group of inmates, snapped his whip overhead to get the prisoners back in line. Caribou quickly scampered off, while Kid only grunted before grabbing his pickaxe out of the wall and walking back to his part of the quarry. Gintoki and Luffy got back to work as well, their previous conversation long lost.
"Smooth move, there. I hope the rest of your crew know how to be more subtle."
"You don't have to worry about them. They can handle themselves fine. They know how to keep out of trouble."
"You knocked the soba over on purpose! Eat it! All of it!"
"Aagh! Gurgblg!"
The Straw Hats, unfortunately, now found themselves in the middle of trouble. After a quartet of Yakuza came up to Sanji's soba stand, trying to extort money from him, they made the terrible mistake of knocking over the soba into the dirt and scaring off the long line of women. From there, Sanji wasted no time in demolishing them. Even Franky and Otae joined in to help. Robin, Usopp, Tsukuyo, and Gengai now watched as Sanji forcefully fed the Yakuza boss the fallen soba while Franky yanked another thug up out from the dirt like a carrot. Otae maintained a gentle smile as she pressed her foot harder against another Yakuza's head, pinning him to the pavement.
"Y... You're going to regret this! You've made a huge mistake!" The one Yakuza member who wasn't currently ground to a pulp shouted over his shoulder as he ran away.
"So, that's settled... But, did we just stir up a hornet's nest?" Usopp pondered as he continued to slurp up his soba despite the chaos.
"Hee hee... Those might have been dangerous people to mess with..." Robin giggled, seemingly unfazed by the potential danger.
"It definitely was," Gengai confirmed grimly.
"Those guys were with Kyoshiro's gang. They aren't the kind of guys to take lightly, especially their leader." Tsukuyo added, pausing to puff on her pipe thoughtfully.
"Look. That huge line has scattered to the wind! I can just tell they're gonna call some awful guys down on us!" Usopp cried out as he looked around the now abandoned street.
"Hmm?" Franky's gaze drifted towards one of the nearby homes, where a young girl with pink hair was cautiously watching them from around a corner. Despite the tense situation, her large smile remained plastered on her face.
"Hey, that's the kid whose soba got spilled—the weird one who was laughing while she cried," Franky said. Catching sight of her, Sanji offered a warm smile and gestured for her to come closer. With hesitation fading, the girl approached as Sanji served up another portion of soba.
"Fortunately, there's enough left for another serving. Here, enjoy," Sanji offered, presenting the bowl to her as he crouched down. The girl's already wide smile expanded as she accepted the bowl with joy.
"Yaaay! Thank you! I waited all day to try this famous soba! I even missed work and used my savings! And then my bowl was knocked over! I was so upset, ha ha!" she shared, her laughter blending with her story, before eagerly tasting the noodles. Tears welled up as she savored the flavor, her smile undiminished despite her stuffed cheeks. "It's so yummy! Ha ha ha! I've never tasted such yummy soba before!"
"You make me wanna smile, too!" Sanji chuckled, appreciating her praise. "What's your name, kid?"
"It's Toko. But say it with the honorific 'O' in front!"
Franky cocked his head. "O-?"
"O-Toko." Robin said. (Otoko (男) = Man)
"Hey, I'm not a boy! Aha ha ha ha! O-Toko's just my name!" Toko laughed loudly.
"Pffft!" Franky and Usopp could barely contain themselves, joining the girl in her laughter. Even Robin found herself smiling as the infectious joyfulness of the mood spread to her. However, it seemed that it did not spread to everyone, as the three local Wanoites exchanged concerned glances.
"That girl…is she…" Otae wondered, just loud enough for only Tsukuyo and Gengai to hear.
"Yeah, I'm afraid so," Tsukuyo confirmed sadly.
"Poor thing." Gengai lamented.
"Neither of you have told them yet?" Otae asked.
"No, I haven't." Tsukuyo shook her head.
Gengai also responded with a headshake. "How do you bring something like that up to begin with?"
"If they're gonna be involved with this country, we should tell them at some point, right?"
"In time. I doubt we can keep the subject away from them for much longer." Gengai assured the cabaret girl as the three of them turned their attention back to their new friends as the girl finished up the last of her meal.
"Ahhh, that was so good! Thanks for the soba! Aha ha ha ha!" Toko beamed in gratitude towards Sanji as she handed back her empty bowl.
Sanji smiled as he accepted the bowl and patted her on the head. "You bet. Come back anytime!"
"I will!" She smiled before suddenly shouting in a panic. "Oh no, I really am late! I'm in big trouble! Aha ha ha! Oh yeah! I'll be passing through here again! Today's the Oiran's procession!"
Robin's eyes widened in surprise. "Toko, are you by chance a kamuro?"
"That's right, I am! It's already started, so I gotta hurry! Aha ha ha ha ha! Bye-bye, see ya! You should watch the procession! The Oiran's so beautiful!"
Usopp wiped a mirthful tear from his eye as his laughter began to settle. "Ahh, what a funny kid!"
"Such a bright, delightful girl," Robin remarked, her sentiment echoed by the rest of the Straw Hats.
"I suppose so," Tsukuyo commented as the locals rejoined the group.
Usopp raised an eyebrow. "Something wrong, Tsukuyo-san?"
"Not really, but there is something you ought to know about that child…" Gengai started.
"Oh yeah, she did mention something about an Oiran and a Kamuro. Can someone explain that?" Franky asked.
"What is an Oiran, you ask?!" Their discussion was suddenly interrupted by Robin's geisha mentor, who appeared with a flourish, strumming her shamisen energetically.
"Aaah! Where'd this paper lantern hag come from?!" Usopp exclaimed, taken aback.
"Who are you calling a wrinkled-up paper lantern?! I'll illuminate your hide, you little snot!" The old lady angrily stomped up to Usopp, continuing to play her instrument.
"Master!" Robin exclaimed, equally surprised.
"Old Lady Tsugaru, what are you doing here?" Tsukuyo asked the woman, slightly annoyed at the sudden interruption before they could delve into explanations.
"I've got good news for you, Orobi! I ran all over the Flower Capital looking for you!" Tsugaru declared before turning back to Franky and the others. "But first! What is an Oiran, you ask?! The Oiran is the highest-ranked courtesan and the top idol of Wano! A vision of grace admired by all!"
Franky raised a finger to his chin, his interest peaked. "Ooh!"
"At present, there's only one Oiran in the whole country: Komurasaki-sama! She's the pinnacle of beauty and grace, coveted by men and admired by women! She's like a deity among us, the epitome of femininity! That's Komurasaki-sama the Oiran!
Sanji, Usopp, and Franky took a collective gulp as they let the information sink in.
"Now that's just crazy! No woman is that perfect!" Usopp finally spoke up.
"Trust me, the old lady here isn't fibbing," the old inventor said, stroking his beard in thought.
Tsukuyo took another drag of her pipe before joining in. "Actually, it wasn't too long ago that this country had two Oirans — Komurasaki is the most recent one to take the mantle. But for a good while, the title was held by Hinowa."
"I never realized that she held such a prestigious position," Robin said in surprise.
Tsukuyo nodded in confirmation. "It's true. However, she ended up retiring a while ago due to her leg injuries, making Komurasaki the sole Oiran in Wano. After Housen was deposed, Yoshiwara fell back into the hands of the Shogun, who left Kyoshiro in charge of things. Normally, a woman with injuries like hers would be seen as a liability and tossed to the street. But Hinowa's influence on the rest of Yoshiwara was too far-reaching. So, the two worked out a deal—Kyoshiro would be in charge of handling the logistics between Yoshiwara and the Bakufu, while Hinowa would handle the concerns of the residents and other day-to-day matters. Thanks to her, the rest of the Hyakka and I were able to continue our duties of acting as security."
"And the Shogun was fine with this?" Franky questioned, raising an eyebrow.
Tsukuyo scoffed. "Orochi only cares about Komurasaki, the same way Housen only ever cared about Hinowa. As long as he has her, he couldn't care less about the rest of the district."
"Indeed, you three truly are the Pillars of Yoshiwara! Hinowa-sama, our radiant sun, spreading her warmth and comfort to all! Tsukuyo-sama, our ever-vigilant moon, whose gentle glow protects us during the long hours of the night! And Komurasaki-sama, our sparkling star, who dazzles all with her glamor!" Tsugaru praised as she strummed her shamisen.
"But don't just take my word for it! See her with your own eyes! There! You can hear it now!" She directed the group's attention further down the street. The men stretched out their ears as they listened, picking up the growing cheers of the crowd on the main street. "The buzz of anticipation and the festive atmosphere envelop her presence! Today, she heads to Orochi Castle for a banquet in honor of the Shogun! And the girl from earlier? She's a kamuro, serving the Oiran."
After her long explanation, which was made even longer no thanks to the author, Tsugaru turned back to Robin. "And Orobi, congratulations! You've been summoned to the ceremony as well!"
"What?!" Usopp shouted in surprise.
"Ooh, Orobi-chan, that's amazing!" Sanji congratulated her.
"I know how you've been hoping to meet Shogun Orochi in person!" Tsugaru grinned.
Robin smiled. "Of course! I can't wait. I shall make my way over shortly. I just wish to have another few words with my friends here and perhaps even view the Oiran's procession if time shall permit."
"Very well, but do not dally!" Tsugaru warned as she rushed off to prepare.
"Well, congratulations, Orobi. It looks like you finally got your wish," Tsukuyo said before her eyes became firm. "But don't forget my warning. There are a lot of dangerous people attending that banquet, not just Orochi."
"I understand. I will be cautious." Robin reassured her friend.
"Now, then, shall we all go and see what the excitement is about?" Otae gestured to the growing roar of the crowd further ahead.
"Lets!" Sanji agreed, the most excited out of everyone.
"All make way for the passage of Oiran Komurasaki!" the announcer declared, leading the procession. It was like a festival coming into town. Gentle music and flower petals danced through the air as the crowd parted to allow the passage of Wano's most brilliant shining star.
"It's the Oiran's procession! Here comes Komurasaki-sama!" One onlooker declared.
"Look at the turnout for her," Franky remarked, impressed by the large assembly.
"The crowd's usually bigger. Since it's a weekday, many are likely stuck at work," Gengai noted.
"Well, that just means a better view for us!" Sanji chimed in, heart-eyed with anticipation.
"What kind of beauty is about to walk down this street?" Usopp, curious, ventured closer, pulling out his goggles for a clearer view of the still-distant procession.
Tsukuyo frowned. "Look, I get why you guys are excited about all this, but there is another thing you ought to know about that woman…"
Her warning was cut short by a sword slashing dangerously close to Usopp's nose.
"YIPE!" the cowardly sniper stumbled back in surprise.
"Sorry, but I'm going to have to ask you all to stay behind the designated line," a monotone voice instructed as the group was greeted by a certain brown-haired youth in a black outfit.
"You could've just told me!" Usopp protested.
"True, but nearly getting to see you piss yourself was more fun." The youth remarked dryly as if this was obvious.
"Who is this jerk? He's wearing the same outfit as that other guy from earlier, too," Sanji wondered aloud. Meanwhile, Gengai once again ducked out of sight behind Franky's massive body.
"Oh, Okita-kun." Otae recognized him, answering the blonde's question.
"Ah, Boss Lady. How's it going?" Okita nonchalantly greeted his captain's love interest.
"I'm just here to see the procession is all. Can I assume you are here to act as security?"
"You guessed it. It ain't just the Shinsengumi either. Pops called in practically the entire police force of Wano for this event. Not that I should be surprised. The old man always was a big fan of Komurasaki."
"You don't share that sentiment, it seems. Compared to everyone else, you seem to be the most calm person here." Robin observed.
"I am on duty, after all. It wouldn't really do if I was acting like the rest of these lovesick idiots. Besides, the Oiran isn't really my type, anyways."
"That's surprising to hear. From the sound of things, I figured she was everyone's type." Franky said with raised eyebrows.
"Well, there's no denying that a lady like Komurasaki is easy on the eyes, but she's always wearing that serene expression. If it were more twisted up in pain, it'd be way better." The Shinsengumi officer commented casually as if he were talking about the weather.
"Oi, this guy just casually admitted to some really atrocious stuff! He's all twisted underneath that handsome face! And this guy is supposed to be a cop?!" Usopp retorted.
"Oi, Sougo. Enough harassing the spectators already. Remain vigilant." the group suddenly found themselves joined by Hijikata.
Sanji clicked his tongue in annoyance. "Not you again."
"Oh, the soba chef from earlier. Thank you again for the meal."
"So, this is what you meant by being on duty," Tsukuyo commented.
"Hijikata-san, you're telling me not to harass the spectators, but from the sound of things, you already harassed these people by making them watch you eat your dog food."
"It's not dog food, you bastard. Mayonnaise is a divine condiment passed down by the gods themselves."
"You say that, but there aren't any actual gods around to confirm that. If you want, I could send you to heaven myself so you can go confirm."
"How about I just send you instead so you can see with your own eyes? Then again, knowing you, you may end up going in the opposite direction."
"Die, Hijikata-san."
"Die, Sougo."
"Um, are you guys actually on the same side?" Franky questioned, baffled by their banter.
"By the way, where is Yamazaki? He should be here on guard duty with us," Hijikata asked, brushing off the cyborg's question.
"Oh, him? He's over there, playing Kabaddminton." Okita pointed towards a plain-looking young man behind them, sidestepping around a group of men all carrying badminton rackets as they raised their arms in defense while repeatedly chanting 'kabaddi.'
"YAMAZAKI! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?!" Hijikata roared as he immediately took off in a sprint after his subordinate, swinging his sword around in a rage. Yamazaki noticed his oncoming superior as he tried to make a run for it but was quickly caught as Hijikata began to pummel him into the ground. Meanwhile, the Straw Hats could only watch this scene unfold in complete confusion.
"Seriously, these guys are supposed to be cops?" They all thought in unison.
However, Franky's attention was soon captured by a troubling sight: three men dressed in rags and covered in filth carrying weapons and expressions of hate, standing in the middle of the road as the Oiran's procession drew nearer.
"Komurasaki…because of you, I'm being chased out of the capital... It's all over for me!" Priest Bingo growled, his voice tinged with rage and grief.
"That witch! If I'm gonna die, I might as well take her down with me!" Lumber Dealer Bongo roared as he brandished his knife.
"I'm gonna kill that woman!" Former Arsonist Bungo exclaimed as he, too, waved his knife around in fury.
"Uh-oh, those guys look like trouble," Franky said uneasily.
"Seems like it," Sougo noted.
"Komurasaki!" The three men roared as they began to rush the Oiran, knives pointed outward.
"Hey, they're trying to kill the Oiran! Aren't you gonna do something?!" Sanji shouted at the strangely nonchalant officer.
"Against them? Nah. A bunch of weaklings like that can be handled easily enough by her personal guard."
In a sudden burst of speed, a figure clad in white rushed forward from behind the procession. With a flash of their sword, the three armed men were struck down in an instant. In the same amount of time it took for the figure to sheathe their blade, the three men hit the ground with a resounding thud.
"Men who would gang up against an unarmed woman brandishing weapons have no right to continue calling themselves men. Consider it an act of mercy that I only used the back of my blade. Cutting you down in such a manner would not be befitting of a samurai."
Standing among the three fallen aggressors stood a figure with long black hair in a ponytail dressed in a white coat over a blue kimono. His facial features were delicate but firm, showcasing a burning warrior's spirit underneath his girlish features, highlighted by the single black eyepatch covering his left eye.
"Kyu-chan!" Otae gasped.
"Wait, you know that swordsman?" Sanji asked, still shocked at the display of skill before him.
Kyubei turned at hearing his name called, catching sight of Otae in the crowd. "Tae-chan?"
"Yep, done in a flash. Just what you'd expect of the next head of the prestigious Yagyuu Clan." Sougo sighed, sounding almost disappointed that more hadn't happened.
"That doesn't excuse choosing to stay on the sidelines. That's negligence of duty." Hijikata reprimanded him as he walked up with Yamazaki under his arm in a choke-hold.
"Hijikata-san, I really don't think you're in much of a position to talk about negligence of duty right now." Sougo pointed out, Usopp and Franky nodding behind him in agreement.
"Hey, if you're gonna blame anyone, blame this fool for playing around when he was supposed to be on guard duty!"
"But Hijikata-san, I had to! This is probably the most attention my character is gonna get in this stupid fanfic, so I had to make the most of it!" Yamazaki tried to explain himself.
"Shut up! I don't care! If you want more narrative focus, then work for it by doing your damn job!" Hijikata berated him.
BANG BANG BANG
The three Shinsengumi officers were quickly silenced as three gunshots rang out, the bullets stopping just short of their feet. The Straw Hat's promptly went on the defensive, wondering just who the source of the attack was. At the same time, the other surrounding onlookers quickly scattered.
"Oi. Right now, all three of you bums are on thin ice. You all must really want to commit seppuku if you're willing to put Komurasaki-chan on the line like this," A coarse voice called out. A nervous sweat poured down their brows as the officers looked up to meet the eyes of their commanding officer.
Striding forward atop a gruff-looking Komadane was an equally gruff-looking old man wearing sunglasses and a similar black outfit as the officers, modified slightly with a tucked-in white scarf and a loose hanging red scarf around his shoulders. A cigarette hung loosely from his lips as he sneered at the trio, both it and his pistol still smoking.
"Matsudaira Katakuriko." Robin whispered to her still-confused crewmates. "The director of Wano Country's police force, including the Shinsengumi. He earned the nickname 'God of Destruction' since his usual method of solving problems involves blowing everything up in sight. However, he has also demonstrated sharp observational skills, so it would be wise to be cautious around him." The Straw Hats quickly settled down, not wanting to draw attention to themselves any further.
"Apologies, Pops. It won't happen again," Hijikata apologized as he, Sougo, and Yamazaki saluted their superior.
"It better not. I'd hate to sadden Kondo by having to put one between your eyes. For now, secure the area and make sure no other fools are getting any bright ideas," Matsudaira ordered.
"Yes, sir!" The three officers quickly moved out, a fire lit under their feet. Matsudaira then directed his attention to the Straw Hats and their friends, being the only people who chose to remain after the whole scene. Matsudaira raised his handgun again.
"Now then, the rest of you punks have about three seconds to step back over the spectator line. One…"
BANG BANG BANG
"What happened to two and three?!" Usopp shouted as he quickly dodged the three shots fired at his feet.
"Never heard of them. A man only needs the number one to get through life."
Franky nodded in understanding, his arms crossed in contemplation. "So true. Couldn't agree more, Pops."
"I disagree!" Usopp retorted.
CLINK
CLINK
"All make way for the passage of Oiran Komurasaki!" The announcer declared once more.
The group's attention was diverted as the sound of jangling metal alerted them back to the procession, which had now gotten closer. However, Oiran's face remained partially covered by her umbrella. Far beneath her extremely tall geta sandals, Toko waved at the group.
"Sorry about that, Komurasaki-chan. Are you okay?" Matsudaira asked, concerned.
"Yes, I'm quite alright, thanks to Kyubei-dono," Komurasaki responded graciously to Kyubei, who only nodded in acceptance. As she then lifted her umbrella, the visage of Wano's unparalleled beauty was unveiled.
Her beauty was beyond simple description. Adorned in a resplendent red kimono decorated with a peacock and floral motif, flowed elegantly as it shimmered in the sunlight. Her turquoise hair was styled meticulously and adorned with floral decorations and pins, each adding to her allure. The contrast of her red nails against the fabric of her kimono added a vibrant touch. Her striking blue eyes mesmerized those who caught her gaze. At the same time, her lips were painted a vivid fuchsia, emphasizing her refined features. As she made her appearance, the crowd quickly gathered around once more, marveling at her stunning presence.
"Eeek!"
"Look over here, Oiran-sama!"
One man had to cover his eyes from the dazzling radiance she seemingly emitted. "My eyes! I'm blind!"
"Oh, she's gorgeous." One woman sighed, feeling faint.
"Whoa...!" Franky's jaw dropped at the sight of her.
"Talk about glitzy!" Usopp adjusted his goggles for a better view.
"What a babe!" Sanji shouted as hearts practically leaped out of his eyes before promptly turning to stone.
The crowd was in an uproar, the sudden fear and apprehension from before immediately washed away by the extravagant beauty of Wano's top courtesan. Behind her, her attackers began to stir once more as they struggled to get back on their feet.
"Komurasaki... Gurr..." Bingo sobbed as he reached out a withered hand.
"You witch…how could you?!" Bungo yelled after her.
"I sacrificed everything—my home, my family, all for you! Return the wealth I gave you, you thief!" Bongo demanded in vain.
However, Komurasaki did not stop her steady progression as she continued to make her way to the palace. Without turning towards them, she finally addressed her attackers.
"Return what you gave to me? Such a request could only come from the most despicable of men. To me, a man's worth is measured solely by the wealth he brings. Without it, he means nothing." Stopping only for a moment, she finally turned, unfolding her fan as she gave the men whose lives she destroyed single-handedly a cute little wink from behind her fan.
"I have only contempt...for the poor man."
And with that, she continued onward, leaving behind the three men in a sniveling heap. While most of the onlookers, including the male Straw Hats, were too enamored to properly regard her words, some were able to pick up on them, particularly Robin, Tsukuyo, and Otae.
"So, can I assume that this is what you initially were trying to warn us about?" Robin asked her friend.
Tsukuyo sighed as she rubbed her temples. "Pretty much. This isn't the first group of men she's swindled like this. I can't say that the men she swindles didn't deserve it, though. Those three, in particular, had some particularly nasty rumors swirling around them. Even though most of the trouble she stirs up gets handled by the Kyoshiro family, there's still a lot that spills over into the rest of Yoshiwara. You wouldn't believe how many men like that I had to deal with coming in to seek revenge against Komurasaki."
Finally, the city guards arrived, surrounding the trio of men and pinning them with staves. "There's no escape for you now. In the name of Shogun Orochi, you are banished! There's no place in the Flower Capital for those who cannot buoy the economy!"
"No, please!" Bingo pleaded.
"Life outside the capital?! It's inhumane!" Bongo wailed.
"Damn you to hell, Komurasaki!" Bungo cursed her as the three men were hauled away.
"Young Master, we should make our way to the castle as well. We are also expected to arrive soon," Kyubei's retainer, a long-haired man with closed eyes, informed. Behind him followed three other men.
"I wish to speak with Tae-chan first. I will rejoin you soon, Toujou. For now, stay with Komurasaki and protect her. While unlikely, we must be wary of further threats."
"Of course, Young Master," The four agreed, if not somewhat reluctantly.
"Kyu-chan. It's good to see you." Otae smiled as Kyubei approached.
"Same here, Tae-chan. I apologize for not being able to visit lately. Things have been quite hectic." Kyubei smiled warmly.
"I didn't expect you, of all people, to be a part of the Oiran's procession," Tsukuyo commented.
"The Yagyuu family has been connected to the Bakufu for generations. It's…a requirement for us to attend these banquets," Kyubei explained, her tone reflecting a measure of discomfort.
"If you don't mind me asking, what is your relationship with Otae-chan?" Sanji asked somewhat jealously, not liking the way the one-eyed samurai looked at her.
"I believe that should be my question for you." Kyubei frowned, just now noticing the grimacing soba chef.
"Oh, these are my friends!" Otae quickly answered to defuse the tension. "This is Sangoro, Usohachi, Franosuke, and Orobi. They all arrived at the Flower Capital just recently to start their businesses, so I've been helping to show them around."
"I see. Well, any friend of Tae-chan's is a friend of mine."
"You're so cute, Kyu-chan," Otae giggled.
"Tae-chan…" Kyubei blushed slightly.
"Come on, Otae-san. No guy likes to hear being called cute like that," Usopp jokingly chided.
"If anything, you should be stuff like how SUPER he looked taking down those guys earlier," Franky shouted as he posed.
"I'll admit, that really was some amazing swordsmanship." Sanji begrudgingly complimented.
"Well, you see, that's where you're wrong," Tsukuyo said.
"What do you mean, Tsukuyo-chan?"
"Well, we mean that Kyu-chan is actually a girl." Otae clarified.
"...Eh?"
Sanji quickly approached Kyubei, now taking in all her features with a more discerning eye, much to her discomfort. After a thorough analysis, he found Otae's words to ring true as the samurai before him was indeed a lady, and a rather pretty one at that. In a flash, he immediately switched into lover-boy mode as he spun in place before taking a graceful knee and taking her hand into his.
"Apologies, my dear. It appears that my senses must be off if I made the egregious error of not recognizing a beautiful woman before my—"
"UUWAAAAH!" Kyubei suddenly yelled. In a sudden show of force, Kyubei locked onto Sanji's hand before spinning around in place and launching the love-sick soba chef through the wall of the nearest building.
"I suppose I also should have mentioned she has a bit of an issue being touched by men," Otae explained with a smile to Usopp and Franky, who currently had their jaws on the floor.
"That is good to know. Thank you." Robin smiled back.
Kyubei panted as she worked to regain control over her nerves. "I'm sorry about that. I hope your friend isn't too hurt."
"Oh, don't worry about him! He's taken way worse hits than that and gotten right back up without a grudge, especially if it involves a lady!" Usopp quickly answered as he backed away slowly.
"Yeah, it's true," Franky laughed. "He's pretty forgiving under those circumstances."
"...I see. Well, tell him I apologize regardless. I'm afraid I must be going now." Kyubei bowed before turning to catch up with the procession.
"Oi, hold on just a second!" Tsukuyo called out before pushing Robin forward. "Take her with you. She's a geisha who's been training hard to attend today's party, and she finally got the invite today. However, as I've been telling her, there are a lot of dangerous people who attend this party as well, so I would appreciate it if you could keep an eye on her."
"I'm with Tsukuyo-san. We'd feel much better knowing that there was someone at the banquet who could keep her safe in case the worst happens." Otae joined in.
The three women shared a look with each other before Kyubei nodded in agreement. "I understand. If she is a friend of Tae-chan's, then she is a friend of mine as well. I promise to protect her with my life."
"Thank you, Kyubei-dono. I will be in your care." Orobi bowed.
"We should get going now." Kyubei turned to leave, with Robin following in tow. Before she left, she gave one last knowing nod to her crewmates, her mission clear. They returned it in kind as Robin made her way down the street. Once they were far enough, Sanji finally extracted himself from the wall and made his way back to his friends.
"What did I miss? Where is Orobi-chan and Kyubei-chan?" Sanji looked around, a noticeable welt forming on the top of his head.
"They just left. Kyubei-san promised to help protect her in case anything happens," Tsukuyo answered, sweatdropping at the sight of the chef acting fine as if he hadn't just been catapulted through a building.
Otae frowned slightly. "I feel bad about not telling Kyu-chan the whole truth."
"It's probably best if you didn't. She said so herself that her family is deeply connected to the Bakufu. There's no telling what her reaction would be if you told her about the rebellion." Usopp reasoned.
"Even so, we're sorry we had to put you in that kind of position." Gengai apologized, finally emerging from his hiding spot with the Shinsengumi gone.
Otae shook her head. "No, Usohachi is right. I just hope she'll be able to forgive us when the time comes."
Tsukuyo put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "I'm sure she will. You know how she feels about you, after all."
"I know. That just makes me feel worse." Otae frowned deeper as she looked toward Orochi Castle.
"Open the gates! Komurasaki-sama has arrived!" Kondo called out from the front of the massive Tori Gates leading into the castle. With a mighty groan, the gates slowly swung open. Komurasaki and her procession made their way inside with the Yagyuu family in tow. Kondo shared a brief greeting nod with Kyubei as they passed each other, with an unknown geisha following alongside her. As the gates slowly began to close themselves once more, Matsudaira rode over to the Shinsengumi chief.
"Oi, Kondo, just what the hell have you been teaching your men? We almost had an incident back in town, and I find them goofing around like a bunch of preschoolers. This ain't field trip day, y'know?"
"Toshi and the others? Sorry about that. I'll be sure to reprimand them later." Kondo bowed in apology.
"Eh, enough of that. Raise your head already, you idiot. The problem's already been taken care of. Though consider yourself lucky that it was just the Oiran. Had it been my daughter out there, I'd have already put a bullet through all your heads. She may be at that age where she no longer wants to do her laundry at the same time as me, but she's my treasure nonetheless. Now, let's go. We got more business to take care of."
"Eh? I was under the impression our primary duty today was ensuring Komurasaki-sama's safety."
"That was only the first thing. Now tell me, what do you know about Udon Prison?"
"So, you got a little sister, Momo-kun?" Tamako asked. Having nearly fully recovered, she now sat atop a ledge next to Kagura, watching Momonosuke train with Shinpachi.
Momo looked up at Tamako and Kagura incredulously. "That is a rude form of address, Tamako! Who do you think I am?!"
"Momo-kun." Tamako and Kagura answered simultaneously.
Momo shook his head. "Forget it...Yes, I have a sister! If alive, she would be 26 years old now."
"So then wouldn't that make you the little brother then-aru?" Kagura questioned.
"Technically, yes, due to the fact that he time traveled here to the future and still remains only eight years old. But chronologically, he would still be the older of the two," Shinpachi explained.
"Oh! I get it now." Tamako said.
"That's our exposition glasses for you," Kagura stated.
"Oi, don't act as if that's my only role! And at least make me an exposition human!" Shinpachi retorted.
"Enough already!" Momo interrupted the rather pointless argument. "The point is, while my mother's demise has been confirmed, there's been no confirmation of Hiyori's death. I hold onto hope that she's out there somewhere, alive!"
"Hm. Well, I hope you two get to reunite soon," Tamako replied.
"I will not," Momo responded, much to the others' surprise. "If Hiyori's identity were to be exposed, Orochi would target her. I cannot seek her out until the battle is won!"
With his conviction set, he turned back to Shinpachi, his shinai at the ready. "Now, Shinpachi-san, come! If we are to win the battle, I must become stronger, even if by a little!"
Shinpachi nodded in understanding, preparing his own shinai. "Very well, Momonosuke-kun. As the first son of Kodokan Dojo and a licensed practitioner of the Tendou Mushin sword style, I promise to train you to the best of my abilities. Now, prepare yourself!"
"Yes!"
From there, the two exchanged a series of blows. For every strike Momo would launch, Shinpachi would deftly parry, instructing the young heir on his form and technique, what to focus on and improve. However, most of these instructions went through one ear and out the other. While it was clear that Momo was taking the training seriously, it was equally clear that his mind was elsewhere. And it didn't take a detective to figure out just what, or more accurately who, was bothering him.
After nearly an hour of training, Momonosuke was barely standing. His breathing was heavy and labored, and each swing showed his growing frustration. But through it all, he refused to sit even once. "Again, Shinpachi-san!"
Shinpachi nodded, maintaining a calm demeanor. "Understood, Momonosuke-kun. Remember to focus on your stance. It's not just about strength."
The clashing continued, each strike releasing Momonosuke's pent-up emotions. However, these same emotions led to more slip-ups and more easily exploitable mistakes.
After taking Tamako back inside for a nap, Kagura leaned against a nearby tree, watching the two spar. "You're really going at it, huh? Wanna break or something-aru?"
Momonosuke paused for a moment, catching his breath. "No, I must keep going. I... I must become stronger!"
With that, he rushed forward, his shinai raised, the image of the silver-haired man he once called his friend flashing through his vision. In a swift, instinctive response, Shinpachi dodged the descending training sword and countered. The impact was such that Momonosuke's shinai broke, simultaneously splitting Momonosuke's weapon and forcefully swinging his own intact weapon into the young heir, propelling him across the ground.
"Momonosuke-kun!" Shinpachi yelled as he rushed to check on him. He had only barely managed to pull back a bit of the force behind his swing, but even then, it must have hurt the boy considerably.
"Dang, Shinpachi. Kiku-chan is not gonna be happy about this-aru." Kagura warned.
"Don't remind me!" Shinpachi momentarily panicked. Slowly but surely, Momo got back up to his feet. He coughed, and his eyes struggled to focus through the tears. He was clearly in a lot of pain, but his samurai pride, along with a mix of anger and frustration at everything that's happened over the last few days, would not allow him to show it as he forced it down and stared down Shinpachi.
"I'm..fine…" Momonosuke coughed. "Just…get me another sword…We'll start again."
Shinpachi frowned as he shook his head, finally deciding to put his foot down. "Momonosuke-kun, it's important to rest too. You say you're fine, but you really will injure yourself at this rate."
"I can't!" Momonosuke shouted, his emotions boiling over. "I have to keep pushing! I have to get stronger! As the rightful Shogun of Wano, I will save my people, with or without Gintoki!"
The Yorozuya employees shared a frown with each other. They knew what the young heir had been feeling this whole time, but there was nothing they could do about it until he was ready to talk. There was already an incredible amount of pressure on the boy as-is. After the absolute rejection of help from Gintoki and later Ashura, they knew he was one step away from a total breakdown.
"Momonosuke-kun…" Shinpachi began. However, before he could say anything further, a blue-clad figure approached the group. It was Zenzou, with an uncharacteristically serious expression.
"Excuse me, I don't mean to interrupt, but could I have a word with you, Momonosuke-kun?"
Sorry for the wait on this one. Just a heads up, but I may be starting a new job soon, so the following chapters may take even longer.
Besides that, I hope everyone liked the introduction. I'm also planning a Dragon Ball crossover one-shot, which I hope to share with you soon. It's a project I'm eager to undertake to highlight the significant influence Toriyama-sensei has had on the industry and the world as a whole.
I look forward to sharing it with you and hope you find it enjoyable. Happy Easter!