Chapter 1044

Thoughts

John was somewhat surprised by Claire's abrupt departure as soon as she brought the food over for Savannah and Young Allison. He actually hoped she would have stayed longer. He would have liked another view inside of her shirt when she bent over. He liked what he saw the first time. It seemed as if she submitted her personal desires for those of the 'Natural Order'.

Maybe Claire didn't want to be the 'main course', but the dessert. It was actually better. They could share all the 'sweet' without the 'sour'. It could be a sex based relationship free from all the entanglements of love. It could also turn into a love relationship without trying. They seemed to just happen.

It made him think of Future Riley. It was something which happened out of the total blue. Sure it was orchestrated, but he never saw it coming. He still believed whatever Future Riley was caught up in with Future Jesse's plan, he believed she loved him as he loved her. It was just a shame she needed to die for nothing. No matter how he tried to get around it, it always landed back on his own doorstep in his mind. He should have been a little more assertive. He wasn't. It was another person who died because of him, just because he was John Connor.

He thought back a little further than Future Riley to Cheri Westin. He remembered Cheri, he hadn't thought of her in a long time. If Future Riley hadn't come along, he would have continued to pursue Cheri. He thought she was actually prettier than Future Riley was. Future Riley took cuts in front of her. Future Riley gave him what he wanted. He didn't know what Cheri's story was, but he would have liked to have found out more.

Morris said she was 'damaged goods'. He really wondered exactly what it actually meant. He felt he was 'damaged goods' as well. He really wondered why he was thinking about Future Riley and Cheri Westin when two hot young females were sitting right in front of him. Maybe it was a reminder to him of the one who got away. Maybe it was a reminder to him of the one who didn't.

It was a cruel reminder about what could be there one minute, and gone the next just as easily as it appeared. He knew what Future Riley's fate was. He didn't know what Cheri Westin's fate was. He wondered if there was any way he could look into it without raising a bunch of red flags or creating problems about it. He knew if he asked any of the Terminators to do it, they would more than likely be questioned by Cameron at some point to find out why and who put them up to it. The finger would point back to him. He could hardly ask Savannah or Young Allison to do it for him.

Maybe the best thing to do would be to just ask Cameron if she could find out what became of some of the students they went to school with including Morris and Cheri Westin. They already knew what happened to Jordon. He still would have liked to have tried to do more, even if it wouldn't have helped. It seemed like a subject best to stay away from.

John wanted to speak with Young Allison about some of her actions regarding the recent battles they fought. Her input contributed greatly to their success. He felt she overstepped her position in the Resistance, but maybe it was a matter of perspective. She was supposed to be one of his top lieutenants in the future. Maybe the future happened a little earlier than he realized. He certainly wasn't going to admonish her for her contribution. He knew she saved lives and machines from damage or termination. He wasn't really sure where to begin.

Maybe he should start by not looking at her top. He couldn't help but look there. It's where his eyes were fixated. He knew she would look like Cameron in a very short time. He looked at her and thought how she looked exactly like Cameron but she was a little younger. Based on her actions and the reports he received from John Henry, he knew she was young in physical appearance only. He was aware she was highly intelligent, well educated, and a very quick thinker. It was clearly obvious when she 'played', she hit hard and played to win.

John thought in the time it took him to make his assessment of her, she probably did the same about him, and five other things since. He was glad Savannah was there. He felt comfortable around her. Young Allison made him nervous. He wasn't sure why. It was probably because his desire for her was incredibly strong. He wanted Savannah, and he wanted Young Allison as well. He wanted both of them now. He knew he wanted the virginity of both of them. He wanted to be their 'first'.

He couldn't help but think every time he was around them. He was sure it was because he didn't believe he was Cameron's first, even if he was as Future John. It wasn't him. He didn't think being with Savannah would upset anyone. He did think being with Young Allison would upset everyone. He was definitely going to have to watch his favorite scenes again as soon as he could. He could clearly see Young Allison was well beyond everything.

Great….

Savannah wondered where the conversation was going to go. She wasn't sure how the three of them ended up there alone with no one else around. Where was Cammy? Where was Cameron? Why did Claire leave? If anything, she thought she would have stayed. She noticed how her blouse was unbuttoned almost all the way. When Claire brought their food and bent down, she was clearly able to see both of her breasts. She figured it was for John's benefit more than it was for hers. She expected Young Allison to say something, but she hadn't.

Why didn't Claire stay to 'protect' Young Allison? If anything, it seemed like she was 'sacrificed' instead. What was her end game there? Was it to show John how Young Allison was still young and Claire wasn't? John could see what promise the future held, or he could have what was available, willing, and ready now. She knew Cameron 'pushed' Claire to 'step up'. Why would she 'step back'? Maybe Claire only wanted the dessert, or to be the dessert.

She actually could understand it. It was always much simpler to be with someone for a short period of time, satisfy each other, and then move on to the next one. There was no hassle, there were no strings attached, there was just love to be shared. Besides, who didn't like getting their bell rung?

She smiled to herself to see John was uneasy because only Young Allison was with her. Maybe she would leave the two of them alone for a few minutes and see what happened. Young Allison didn't seem nervous at all. Young Allison previously mentioned she knew how to handle John with what Cameron taught her. She knew interactions with real people could become complicated very quickly. She knew Young Allison lacked experience. It made a difference when emotions and feelings started to become involved. One could know everything in the world, and still get caught up in them. Emotions and feelings seem to have a way to trump knowledge.

Maybe she should have advanced her relationship with Young Allison more than she did. The reason why she hadn't done it was because she knew it would go completely sexual within a matter of minutes. Once they started to kiss and touch each other, she wouldn't be able to restrain herself. She was pretty sure Young Alison wouldn't either. She was willing to bet on the first kiss Young Allison would touch her at the same time. It was OK too. She would match every move Young Allison made at the time. It would indicate to her what she would be allowed to do.

She didn't think it would be more than five minutes before they took things a little lower. It was definitely a powder keg, floating in a pool of nitroglycerin, waiting for 'someone' to light the fuse. The 'someone' was most likely going to be Young Allison. She was a 'cherry bomb' waiting to go off. It's all it would take for everything to explode into a wild physical relationship.

She really would like to take things a little slower if it was possible. She was aware things escalated rapidly between Young Jesse and her. They both lacked experience at the time, but it didn't stop things from moving along rapidly. They both knew what it was they wanted. They both knew what they wanted to share. They were both eager to express their love for each other in a physical way. She wanted the emotional framework to be there and solid. She believed it was.

She looked at John and at Young Allison. She realized if she didn't do something soon, Young Allison was going to bypass her and go after John. She really didn't see how he would be able to turn her down. She didn't believe any normal male would be able to do so. She knew Young Allison wouldn't take 'no' for an answer. She would push everything along, even if she needed to do it herself.

Savannah wondered what all Cameron drilled into Young Allison's head. She knew it was plenty. She figured whatever Cameron did with her growing up, she did it three times more with Young Allison. No, probably five times more. Anna was a clone of her physically and with the 'Neural Interface'. She ran Cameron's program as her base program and carried out Cameron's instructions. She was with Young Allison eighteen hours a day. She didn't know Anna was with Young Allison for an additional four hours as Young Allison slept. She fed her information and knowledge subliminally. She was still unaware Cameron also conducted The same procedure with her as well. The task was turned over to Cammy upon her creation. It was something Cameron hardwired into Cammy. Even if Cammy didn't want to do it, she was still compelled to do it anyway. Somehow they all believed it was for their own good.

Young Allison started to blink.

A rash of thoughts crossed her mind.

Young Allison watched her mother depart after she made John and them breakfast and cleaned up. She noticed her mother's shirt was unbuttoned far enough so when she bent down, her breasts were clearly visible. She saw them as well when their food was set down before them. She understood her mother did it for John's benefit. She was sure Savannah didn't mind either.

She also did it in front of her. It seemed like a challenge. It gave her a chance to size up the competition. She would deal with it later. When her mother left, she glanced out and saw her stop Cammy from coming in as she led her away. Cammy looked back twice as her mother ushered her from where they were. It was clear Cammy wanted to continue on to the commissary to be with Savannah. She didn't mention it to Savannah, besides John was right there in front of her. She really didn't think she needed any more competition right now anyway.

She knew she was jealous of her mother and John being alone. She was also aware Cameron was using her mother to accomplish her goals, even if it was outside of the 'Natural Order'. She knew Cameron would breed her mother to achieve her goals. She was aware Savannah forbade Cameron from breeding her since she was able to conceive. She understood Savannah's concern and why specifically in regards to producing children and needing to give them to someone else. She didn't think it would be too big of a problem if the mindset from the beginning was how things were going to be once they played out.

The unspoken challenge from her mother needed to be answered. She knew she was at a disadvantage in dealing with males in a sexual manner. Her mother possessed plenty of experience and knew what to do. She was well aware of everything which needed to be done and could be done. There was still no substitute for experience. She knew the apprehension level was going to be through the roof when the events actually started to occur. She would most likely be subjected to more discomfort and pain than her mother would by doing the same things. It was something she was going to need to dive head first into and just do it. How hard could it be?

Of all the options Cameron created, it was HER baby Cameron wanted for her own child with John. Cameron never said it outright to her, but she knew it. She was aware Savannah 'acted' on her own to have a child for Cameron only a few years after she was able to do so. She didn't plan to wait as long. She wanted Cameron to have what she most desired, a child. It would be Cameron's child with John, as Cameron's own. The only way it wouldn't happen, was if she spent a few years in the past. Then she would be older when she returned. She knew it was all window dressing for the others. She really didn't see what the big deal was.

Young Allison smiled to herself. She knew with temporal management, and a trip to Cameron's base, she could be back there in an hour as a late teen, ready to go. CamNet made her aware the genetic material she would need was in a lab locally, and in Australia with Camille, for Young Jesse. It's if John didn't deliver. It was if John wouldn't deliver it into her himself. She would be able to obtain what she needed, when she needed it. It was something she was in no hurry to pursue. She wouldn't mind trying all the other things, she just didn't want to take it too far in regards to herself and future.

She needed to consider some of the other players. Young Jesse was a wild card. She was outside the scope of the 'Natural Order' and clearly a 'backup' if something happened to Savannah, or her, or both of them. It was why Cameron kept her half a world away, to protect her. She thought there could be some other issues as well. There was a good chance Cameron didn't want Young Jesse and Savannah to grow too close, so she couldn't grow closer to Savannah first.

The concept of having a backup for Savannah and her wasn't a new consideration for her. It was something she wanted to take care of herself. She was sure it would be viewed as highly unorthodox, and unethical, by everyone.

She instructed Summer herself about the future and where her place would be in it, if she was ever 'unavailable' to be at John's side. The event would most likely mean she was dead. She probably would have been killed. It wasn't a pleasant thought, but she knew John needed to be protected. Summer could take her place.

She didn't know Anna visited Summer every night after visiting her. Holly and Hanna worked on Summer's education, Anna instructed Summer in her 'other' duties. All of the girls were instructed about their 'other' duties. They would have no inhibitions when it became time to perform those 'other' duties.

She waited for John to start asking her questions, but it was clear he was hesitant to do so. She knew if Savannah left the two of them alone, he was going to become very uncomfortable. She looked him over and saw he was uneasy in her presence. Cameron instructed her on how to motivate and manipulate all of them except Savannah and herself. She knew if she opened her top up like her mother did and leaned over at the same time as her mother, John would look down her top and not her mother's top. She would meet the unspoken challenge. She was trained to be competitive. It didn't matter what the competition was. It was the challenge which mattered.

Young Allison finished her blink.

She saw Cammy and her mother walk away. She turned her attention back to John.

It seemed there were a lot of things which could cross her mind in a short amount of time.

Anna shared a good time with Summer and Jan. Even though Jan was a little older than Summer, it was clear Summer was much more intelligent. She seemed to be much more proficient at everything. She was sure it was because of the training and instruction Summer received from the Metal girls when she was awake and sleeping. Young Allison always worked with her every day as well.

They were at the swing set in the park. The last time she saw this setting, she was in the B-25 Savannah flew with Cameron. Was it really only yesterday? It was. It seemed like so much happened in such a short time. It seemed there was a lot of action the last few weeks everywhere associated with the Resistance.

It was clear Jan and Summer were the best of friends. Both girls were never around children their own age for very long. They shared a common upbringing full of the same restrictions and threat of danger. The difference was Jan didn't receive the same 'Terminator Instruction' Young Allison and Summer received. Since Jan was John's sister, her usefulness was limited for Cameron's goals. They weren't Hillbillies after all. Those goals were really Future John's goals. Future John didn't have a younger sister named Jan. It was a clear indication the future wasn't written in stone, even if it was treated as such.

Anna knew what direction Cameron wanted for Jan and Summer as they grew up. It would be another way to have an additional 'backup' reserved for John with Summer. The future is what drove Cameron, the present was only the time in between what needed to be done, sooner or later, and what was GOING to happen.

The goals were already laid down. They would be achieved no matter what was necessary to make sure it happened.

Sarah was on her run through the park. Jim was by her side. She knew it was never safe, but she did feel safer with a Terminator alongside of her. Jim was with her quite a lot over the years. She felt very comfortable in his presence. It was usually Bob or Jim who accompanied the Reese family wherever they went. Things were relatively quiet for her personally since they were at the Resistance base. She wasn't used to such a long time period without being chased by a Terminator.

She was aware she owed the current period of tranquility along those lines to Cameron and the other Terminators. She really didn't know how long it was going to last. So far her daughter hadn't needed to face any Terminators and run for her life. There were times when she wondered if Jan was overprotected. She was trained in the basics, as well as how to evade a Terminator if the event ever arose. She hadn't really been trained to fight any Terminators, or other Skynet forces.

It was clear to her both Savannah and Young Allison received extensive training. She watched Summer interact with Jan. Summer was a little bit younger than her but she sure seemed to know an awful lot about everything. Whatever she talked to Summer about or asked her anything, she knew the answer. It seemed like she knew everything.

There were a lot of things to think about. She knew Kyle wanted to give Jan a real life. She tried so hard to do it for John. It never worked out. Skynet always found them. Cameron offered them a way to have a real life for Jan. It could be done in the past. She could do it for Jan and for Kyle. She knew Kyle would like Jan to have a real life. He grew up in the Wastelands and he never wanted it for her. She understood in order to give Jan a real life in the past, she would have to leave John. So far she was unable to do it. She felt compelled to remain at his side for as long as she could. Cameron once told her Future John said she was the best fighter he ever knew. If she turned tail and ran into the past, what would it make her? She didn't think it would make her much.

It remained a continual and unresolved problem between Kyle and her about what was best for Jan. She did want a better life for her daughter, but she couldn't leave her son behind. She knew there was a Duplicate set of Cameron and the girls created through a TDE malfunction. She wondered if there was any way to replicate it and create a Duplicate of her. She knew it could just as easily result in her termination. There was another prospect, a cyborg version of her could be created.

She saw how much like the human females Ally, Sheila, Hanna, and Anna were. They obviously weren't the same since they were cyborgs. They did possess many of the characteristics of the human females they shared the 'Neural Interface' with. It was just a hard concept for her to wrap her head around based upon all of her negative interaction with Terminators in the past.

Jim could see Sarah was a little distracted. He would try a simple question to see exactly what their goal was. Right now it seemed indeterminate.

"How far were you going to run today?" Jim asked.

Sarah looked over at Jim. She realized she was lost in thought. She noticed they went much further than normal.

"I really don't know." Sarah said.

Jim was a little concerned about her appearance. He handed her a water bottle.

"I would appreciate it if you drank some water, Sarah." Jim said.

Sarah could feel she was a little overheated. She drank a few sips of water. She could feel she was a little more drained than normal. The goal was to stay in shape, not hurt herself, or make herself sick.

"I think it's far enough for today." Sarah said. "We can start back now. Thank you for watching out for me, sometimes I get a little lost."

Jim understood how things could weigh on a human. They tended to be affected in different ways at different times. He wanted to ask her if she was running from the past. He knew it seemed to be something which troubled all of the humans. He didn't know she was running from the future.

Vanna really liked to be with Claire. She was a lot like Allison but much more intense and passionate. If Claire stayed at the base, she intended to see Claire a few times a week. She was with Claire and Allison before both on the same day more than a few times. She found it was better to be with Allison first. If she was with Allison after Claire, it seemed to leave a lot to be desired sexually. She might have to cut back on visiting Jesse as much. She would need to work it all in with Allison there all the time. It's if she stayed. Allison would always come first.

There was no doubt Allison was her true love and soul mate but being in an open relationship provided for a little variety. There was no shortage of Metal girls either. She really looked forward to some more time with Holly as well. She would gladly share Cam with Allison to achieve it.

The thing she most looked forward to was Allison's baby. She knew she would be the primary 'mother' to it. It was fine with her. She didn't want to see Allison overwhelmed and flustered by motherhood. She witnessed the struggle Riley went through recently. It was actually quite disturbing. Tending to Precious further proved to her it was what she wanted.

She did want her own child, but she could never ask Savannah to give up another child. She knew how deeply it hurt Savannah and how it would hurt her in the same situation. She knew it would actually hurt Savannah even more because she would be able to see the child every day and it wouldn't be hers, even if it was. No. It just wasn't something she could do to Savannah.

It made her wonder about the other versions of 'Savannah Weaver' who were out there. There were two Duplicates of her, which was still very hard for her to wrap her head around, along with Future Savannah. More than likely there were other timelines created as well since they attempted to stop Skynet. She wondered if every version of her, other than Savannah, was sterile. Maybe a Skynet future damaged every version of Savannah going forward after Judgment Day. Perhaps it was one of the reasons why Cameron pushed so hard for the girls from the present to 'take care of everything' before Judgment Day occurred. After Judgment Day they might not be able to do anything as far as reproduction went.

She really needed to think about what Savannah did for two other versions of herself who couldn't reproduce. It made her love and admire Savannah even more. She understood she was Savannah, but she was glad Savannah wasn't her.

Allison wanted Holly to go with them but Vanna was OK with the Metal girls staying behind to share with each other and her mother. She knew she wasn't anyone to judge. She wondered how she would feel if she was in the same situation and there was a daughter of hers, which was only a couple of years younger because of some temporal event. She wouldn't want her looking over her shoulder or making faces with her personal choices. Her personal choices should remain her personal choices. She knew the same thing should apply to her mother.

Whatever….

It was what it was.

She wanted to get closer to Vanna again. They clearly drifted further apart than either of them wanted. It's just how it was now. She knew who was responsible for it. It was her fault for wanting to be with her parents and sister. She couldn't blame Vanna for expanding to 'everyone'. She ended up doing the same thing too. Who didn't like getting their 'bell' rung? Now they all did it and no one seemed to have any problems or issues with it. It really was beautiful for all of them.

Allison didn't know how best to get closer to Vanna again. She hoped the baby would help, but it might drive them further apart. She could see the situation between Derek and Riley didn't seem to get closer with the arrival of Precious. If anything she saw it drive them further apart as Riley struggled with both her pregnancy and being a mother. She saw Vanna was a natural with Precious and would clearly be a better mother than she could ever be. She knew she would need the help and reassurance Vanna would provide. Vanna was always there for her when she needed her.

She wondered if maybe it was time Vanna and her put all the others aside, maybe even Cam and Holly too, and entered into a committed relationship. It would be the two of them and her baby, THEIR baby. They could have a family like they always talked about. It started not too long after Vanna first 'took' her. She loved Vanna dearly then and still did. It just seemed so many things happened in between and a whole lot of other people. She wasn't even sure how many females she was with in the future. It was more than a few. Vanna was with two or three times as many. She was pretty sure Vanna was with every female who wasn't in a committed relationship with a male at some point in the future. She didn't want to take it away from Vanna. She was pretty sure Vanna needed to be with 'everyone' so she could escape from her past. Maybe it was best to let things remain as they were and not worry about it. They would probably be tied up enough dealing with their own baby once it arrived.

Maybe it was time to become submissive again to Vanna. It's when their relationship always seemed to work best and they concentrated on each other. She was afraid she became too independent now for it. It seemed Cameron encouraged her to find her own voice and freedom. She wished she would have listened to Cameron when she wanted to make her more like Future Allison. After she met Future Allison, she wished she was like her. She wasn't. Future Allison was clearly a superior individual to her. Young Allison was clearly a superior individual to her as well.

Now it was time to do what Vanna wanted. She needed to readjust to the way it was. She needed to move backward to move forward. She didn't mind so much as she thought she would.

In their relationship Vanna was always dominant. Maybe it was because Vanna was older and she was young when Vanna first 'took' her. It was what she wanted. She could tell Savannah was different. Savannah wanted to be the same as Young Allison and went out of her way to make sure Young Allison would always have a choice and a voice. Sometimes it was strange how with everything the 'same', it could still be so different.

Allison and Savannah established a love relationship when Savannah returned from the future. Savannah established one with Future Allison too in Cameron's future.

One time Allison noticed Savannah seemed a little down when they made love together. She finally got Savannah to tell her what was bothering her. Savannah wanted to know something, but was very embarrassed to ask about it. She thought she was most qualified to know. She was with Vanna thousands of times. Savannah wanted to know if after having two children if she was 'stretched out' down there. Savannah thought she might be a little after she asked the question, but maybe it was all in her head. She didn't want to ask the Metal girls or anyone else. She didn't want it to get back to Cameron. Savannah was worried John might not be satisfied with her if she wasn't as 'tight' as she could have been.

Allison did notice there was a sight difference in some of the things they did. It was noticeable to her at first, but seemed to have lessened over time. She didn't want Savannah to worry about it. It was a natural part of life. She told Savannah everything was the same to her. For the things they shared, it didn't make any difference whatsoever.

Everyone knew Cameron wanted a baby of her own from Young Allison and John. She also decided to suggest to Cameron she harvest the genetic material from Young Allison and let her mother carry the child she would want from Young Allison. If the method was used from the start, it would be less like 'taking' her child from her. It would leave Young Allison in her 'original condition'. It would leave her with a tight and firm young body until she was ready for a child of her own. She was sure John would probably appreciate it more than Young Allison actually would.

Allison touched her belly. Would this baby stick? She doubted it. It really made her wonder how many of her children Skynet was able to kill retroactively, or was it proactively. She really hated Skynet.

Closing monologue by Cameron:

Thoughts

Many believe it begins in the heart
It's actually all in the mind
The answers are there
That one must seek to find

To find the correct answer
One must ask the right question
If things take a wrong turn
It will create a bad impression

Through everyone's mind
Many things are mulled
It remains to be seen
What can actually be culled

It seems many things
Can start out as a wish
One begins the search
As they hunt and fish

One's insides may soon
Be twisted in knots
The sad part about it all is
It stems from one's own thoughts

Nobody