Huan Strongarm: A Bartfort Folktale

by Vergil Creiger

In which a simple delivery to Holfort goes horribly horribly wrong.

37. Tathal the Wanderer

The ruined Cullis Gate is still there, and was excavated by the Holfort government as I was researching for this book; the weird glass sculptures left in the wake of Leon's initial skirmish with the Grandmaster made it fairly simple to find. We were able to reactivate it by procuring a new Prism, and made contact with the civilisation on the other side: unlike Holfort they were unaffected by the Blank, and well remembered the invincible black dog that had rampaged through their lands. I did mention, after all, that they worship his statue to this day.

Not everyone he would meet would become his ally. Before the God Hound passed through it and began his Exile, before Rhukha passed through in his search for the mage Nutengov, someone else had passed through the Cullis Gate: Twin Pupils, lover of the Twin Saints, had in ages long past walked the same path that his descendant now trod. He entered this distant land, fought many terrible foes and left his own legend for Leon to discover.

Unfortunately, many of these terrible foes were still around. And they were very much not fans of the Bartfort bloodline.

Huan Strongarm: A Bartfort Folktale, by Lufas Maphaahl

Leon was spat from the other side of the Cullis Gate at running speeds, crashing hard into a stone wall. Moz made an ungodly crashing noise as he tumbled across the rocky ground, while Pietru shrieked as she was very nearly bifurcated by the freezing axe. There were a few moments of disoriented panic as everyone regained their bearings.

"What… the…"

They were in a massive cavern that stretched off into the distance, the roof supported by colossal, naturally formed stone pillars. The floor was dotted by a sea of square plinths, each one holding a statue; they were all impossibly detailed, and generated enough light to illuminate the entire cavern. On one wall was a massive, opaque glass window set into the wall, affixed with an odd telescope looking device made of a series of lenses that gradually increased in size; presumably, this was for looking through the bizarre window.

On the floor near the device was a furry, brown creature about the size of a teddy bear. It had eight limbs tipped with claws like those of a mole and floppy ears like a beagle, with a short snout tipped with a cute black nose. It had a single, massive eye that it kept firmly closed, with long black lashes that would have made Leon's sisters burn with envy.

"Wait!" The creature held up two of its paws while the other four covered its eye. "Don't come any closer!"

"What the hell is that?" Pietru demanded, flapping her wings anxiously. "Where the hell are we?"

"We're on the other side of the Cullis Gate," coughed Leon. "So who knows."

"There's no way out," the creature said. "The gate is closed."

Moz figured it out first. "You… You are the Keeper of the Gate, aren't you? It was you who turned Lord Leon into stone!" He pointed at the odd device with his sword. "You were using this to peer through the gate!"

"It's my job!" Despite his words, the Keeper looked extremely guilty. "It is my duty to guard the Gate, to defend this place from those who might plunder it."

Pietru had calmed down enough to sniff him curiously. "What are you anyway?"

"I am an Occuluncus," the creature declared. "And I would really appreciate it if you could respect my personal space. I actually don't like it when I turn people to stone."

The cavern echoed with a sibilant hiss as the remaining occupant of the cavern stirred awake; the quadrupedal green Warmother had lain unseen amongst the glowing statues, having been momentarily knocked out by the forced transfer. The crest on its head began to quiver as it groggily looked around.

Leon met its eyes, the sleepy look immediately replaced by blind panic.

The UnFae shrieked and scrambled away as the wolfdog lunged across the room, barely dodging as he crashed into and shattered the beautiful statues. "What's happening?" asked the Occuluncus shrilly. "What's going on?"

Moz snatched the freezing axe off the floor. "Help him!" He flung the weapon as hard as he could, the living weapon curving through air and embedding itself in the Warmother's flank; it screamed in pain and tumbled to the ground, allowing Leon to finally leap at it for the killing blow.

They were all surprised when the unstable ground collapsed beneath them, sending Leon, the axe and the Warmother tumbling into the abyss as Moz, Pietru and the Occuluncus screamed behind them. The wolfdog landed on an inconvenient stalagmite, shattering it beneath his weight. The mutant UnFae snarled, yanking the axe out of its side with its teeth.

This new cavern was much darker than the last, and filled with the stench of slimy living things. Leon's mind raced: he had been bombarded with one thing after another ever since the attack of the Lao-Shan Lung, and it was starting to overwhelm him. "Put down the axe," he growled.

The UnFae bared its hideous teeth in a creepily human sneer.

They both had the shit scared out of them when a new creature lunged out of the darkness; it was slightly bigger than a Fatalis, its body covered by a brown chitin exoskeleton. Its bulky thorax was dragged across the ground by six huge arms tipped by human-like hands, and below its waist a long tail extended into the shadows behind it. Its head was flat and armoured, with glowing red eyes and huge jaws lined with long, serrated teeth.

"Holy balls!" Leon yelped, barely leaping out the way as the creature's fist swung towards him; the mighty punch sundered the ground beneath their feet, and once again he found himself tumbling into the depths of the earth.

It must have been a deliberate move on the monster's part, as they had fallen directly into its nest; the floor, walls and ceiling were covered in glowing green eggs, their translucent shells offering a shadowy glimpse of the embryonic horrors within. Leon and the Warmother bared their fangs as they stared the creature down, the axe now circling anxiously overhead.

"Intruders!" Like almost every other monster or animal, Leon could understand everything it said. "Get away from my babies!"

"Sure!" Leon agreed. "Just let me go!"

The monster actually stopped and thought about it for a moment. "Hm… No!"

The wolfdog and UnFae leapt apart as it rapidly punched with its six fists, decimating its own lair. The two quadrupeds raced away, but the creature was seemingly more interested in Leon. He caught one of its arms between his fangs, flipping it over his shoulder and biting the limb clean off. The monster screamed, disappearing into a hole dug into the cave wall.

"Woah," whispered Leon. The Warmother followed his gaze; the entire cavern was dotted with openings in the rock, leading into a warren of tunnels that surrounded the lair like a web. "Talk about giving yourself the home field advantage."

The UnFae seemed to understand him, its body language becoming cautious and wary. It barely leapt away before the monster attacked it from below, it huge tail exploding from the ground and retracting before they could attack it.

Leon met the green horror's eyes. "Stay separated. If we stand too close then we'll be sitting ducks."

The Warmother nodded reluctantly, its crest quivering as it tried to anticipate the next attack. After a few more strikes of its tail, Leon caught it between his teeth and ripped the monster out of the ground; with a muffled snarl he tore the tail clean off, the stump erupting with neon green blood that tasted weirdly of hot plastic.

"My tail!" It reared upright, clearly no longer interested in hit-and-run tactics. "I'll kill you both!" With a scream of rage it slammed its fists into the ground, rupturing the stone beneath their feet and sending both of them tumbling as their footing disappeared. The freezing axe swooped out of nowhere, carving out its left eye. "Gah! What in the dry sandy fuck was that?"

"Good one, lil buddy!" Leon grew in size, using his increased weight to keep his position stable. "I've got this!"

He leapt through the air, tearing off two of its remaining arms with one bite. Leon spat out the severed limbs as the creature shrieked in pain, shrinking slightly to make it easier to turn. "Do you think this is funny?" The monster was spitting with rage. "You arrogant, ignorant little bugs! This is nowhere near my limit!"

It plucked one of the luminescent green eggs off the wall, crushing it in its hand and guzzling the juices like a squashed fruit. Immediately its injuries healed, its eye, tail and all three of its arms growing back before their eyes.

"Oh come one!" Leon yipped with exasperation. "Cannibalism superpowers? This is the sort of crap I'd expect from you!"

The Warmother rolled its eyes, but didn't particularly argue the point. The renewed creature sneered vindictively. "Your nightmare has only begun."

The monster emitted an awful shriek that made Leon's ears flatten against his head; while the Warmother instantly tipped sideways as the noise knocked it out, Leon remained unaffected. He could tell from the monster's face that that wasn't part of the plan.

"How?" it rasped. "Why aren't you under my spell?"

Leon grew to his full height, forcing it to tilt its head back to keep meeting his gaze. "Because I'm the mothertrucking God Hound, that's why."

The creature was too surprised to escape into its hole, screaming in pain as he began tearing it apart; he was too durable for most of its attacks to have any effect, but those that did healed almost instantly. Soon it was a bleeding mess on the ground, the wolfdog's tail wagging furiously as he placed his paw victoriously on the corpse's thorax.

"Yes!" Leon barked, waking up the Warmother accidentally. "Who's the man!"

"Did you think you won?"

Leon leapt away as the corpse began to move, the stomach area wriggling as something stirred beneath the skin. With a wet, disgusting splat the monster's belly exploded, sending gooey chunks of green viscera flying in all directions.

"I'm finally free!" The new entity cackled like a madman, shaking off his predecessor's innards like… well, like Leon. "I must thank you, interlopers, for slaying the old cockroach once and for all!"

He was clearly of the same species, only shorter and skinnier, standing only a little taller than Sir Onemore. He lacked an exoskeleton, and instead his face and chest were made of ash grey flesh. His six arms were covered in reptilian scales, as was the long tail that writhed slowly behind him. Unlike his predecessor he had legs, which were clawed and reptilian like his arms. Bony protrusions jutted from his head and chin in a way that aped human hair, while his eyes were a familiar blood red.

Leon was instantly reminded of Cell and Freeza in their final forms.

The comparison was immediately justified when the newcomer attacked at dazzling speeds, punching him across the room; Leon let out a canine yelp of pain as he crashed into the opposite wall, the stone wall exploding into dust and broken rock. The creature turned on the Warmother next, causing it to freeze like a deer in the headlights. "Let me guess: you're the talkative one?"

A blast of green mucus gushed from the monster's jaws with the force of a water cutter; the UnFae flung itself out the way at the last second, the projectile carving a long rent in the floor, wall and ceiling. The Warmother screamed as the cavern collapsed on top of it.

"Pathetic," the newcomer scoffed. "If that old bastard was killed by you then he deserved it."

The dust cloud blew apart as Leon unleashed a sonic bark, blasting the monster across the cavern. "Pitiful," he scoffed; he skidded to a stop, his claws carving long rents in the cavern floor as he dug in his toes and forced himself to a stop. "You are worth less than trash-"

He howled in pain as his three left arms were suddenly torn off; Leon had shrunk himself down and rushed in, savagely tearing into the monster's side.

"Insolent mammal! How dare-" The Warmother bit him in the leg, dancing away before he could strike back. Its fanged mouth curled in a cruel grin as he began to stagger. "What… the…"

"Venomous fangs," said Leon flatly. "Of course you have venomous fangs. Why not?"

One of the nearby eggs popped like a zit, its gooey green insides floating through the air to be slurped into the monster's mouth. Almost instantly his missing arms grew back, the effects of the UnFae's venom disappearing without a trace. "Perfect," he crooned. "Now, clearly I'm going to need a little help."

With bizarre noise the creature split in two, the movement so seamless that even Leon's super senses struggled to tell who was the original and who was the duplicate. The Warmother yelped as one of them tackled it; they both screamed as they fell into one of the holes left by the initial monster, their voices slowly fading from hearing as they plummeted into the depths.

"Damn," said Leon. "That's one deep hole. Respect."

The six armed beast seemed genuinely unsettled. "It is deep," he admitted. "I actually can't sense my copy anymore-" There was a loud clang as the axe abruptly hit him in the head, bouncing off one of his horns in a shower of sparks. "Gah! You little bastard!"

While he was distracted, Leon turned his attention to the eggs. "First rule of RPGs: the healers die first!" He barked, the sonic wave causing hundreds of eggs to burst in an enormous cone shape.

"Not so fast!" The reptilian feet braced against the floor as his hands clasped together; two were over his abdomen, two were over his chest and two were over his head. "Arise, my children!"

The remaining eggs hatched all at once, the cavern filling with the cries of newborns; they bore a creepy resemblance to human skeletons, with thin ashen skin pulled tight over their emaciated ribs. Their hands were blood red and tipped with claws, while bony tails snapped behind them. Their smooth skulls had no eyes that Leon could see, and each had a single horn at the crown of their head.

"Kill him!" The offspring howled as they attacked in a great wave, and the wolfdog snarled as he began tearing them apart. "How does it feel to be overwhelmed by a never ending army of… of…"

Luckily, this guy was to UnFae what Elodach was to actual main villains; Leon tore the skeletal creatures into confetti, their attacks never even breaking his skin. In twenty five seconds there were less than a tenth remaining, huddling around their leader's ankles for protection. The wolfdog glared, causing the six armed monstrosity to flinch with fear. "Alright," he growled. "Let's try something new."

This time the bark was different; instead of creating physical force it shattered their eardrums, causing the weaker monsters to collapse to the floor and howl as they clutched the sides of their heads. Blood gushed out of their leader's ears, and his vision swam as he stumbled in place.

"Gotcha!"

He was completely unprepared when Leon rushed in, crying out as the wolfdog grew in size and snapped him up between his fangs; the monster braced himself, his feet on Leon's lower jaws and his many arms on the roof of his mouth. His muscles screamed as he fought to keep the giant canine from cheering him up like a bone.

"You… cannot kill me…" he wheezed. "I am… I am greater than… than any mere…"

The wolfdog's greatest asset was always his infinite stamina; where any normal predator would have had to relax its jaw under the strain, Leon just bit down until he could hold on no longer. The creature screamed as his body was torn asunder, his severed head sent flying as Leon literally chewed through him with ease. The last thought to go through his mind was that he still had a chance: if he could only eat one of the newborns, he would be healed without a scratch.

Then the freezing axe swooped out of nowhere, cleaving the severed head in two.

"Blech!" Leon gagged as he spat out the remains. "Nasty!" He yelped as a chunk of rock fell from the ceiling, narrowly missing him as it caved in the floor. "Okay! That was probably a little more destructive than it should've been! Time to go!"

The wolfdog shrank in size for manoeuvrability, avoiding the falling debris and snatching up the axe between his teeth after it was trapped beneath a falling rock. As the cavern collapsed around him he spotted a sunlit opening ahead; he made a beeline for it, leaping through the air and wishing he had fingers as he clawed his way up the steep bank.

His eyes burned from the harsh sunlight as he emerged above ground, chucking the sentient axe into the air as he dragged his body out the hole. He was bombarded with intense heat, shaking the dust from his fur and squinting as his eyes adjusted.

Leon was surrounded on all sides by immense dunes of sand, an endless desert that stretched as far as the eye could see. "It was night back in Holfort," he whispered. "If it's daytime here, then… then I must be halfway around the world!"

His nose twitched as he caught a new scent; when he turned around he saw a modest shelter, with wooden beams holding up worn animal skins to create a small, blessed patch of shade. A middle aged man sat in the shelter and gave him a friendly wave. "Lord Leon!" It was the most unintentionally menacing thing that anyone had ever said to him. "You're early!"

An anxious canine whine escaped his throat. "Please tell me this isn't more future seeing bullshit."

"I could, but I would be lying." The man gestured to an empty spot, already decked out with a pile of cushions perfect for a dog to nap on. "Take a seat. Your friends are on their way."

Leon sized the guy up as he padded into the shade; he had the skin colour and proportions of a Holfort man, an unkempt beard, thinning hair and deep lines around his tired brown eyes. He was wearing a dirty brown robe that had clearly seen a great deal of use, with a patchwork of repairs the only thing keeping it from falling apart.

The man and the God Hound cringed as a gleaming armoured hand erupted from the sand, reflecting the harsh sunlight straight into their retinas. Moz dragged himself awkwardly above ground, Pietru fluttering out behind him while the Occuluncus perched precariously on his shoulder. "Confound this sand!" Onemore cursed. "I swear, if I ever find out who was behind that cave in, I'll…"

He trailed off as he saw the wolfdog waiting for him. "You'll what?"

"Nothing!"

"Why is it so bright?" Pietru complained. She floated down to the shelter and curled up at Leon's side. "Shade! Glorious shade!"

Remembering that her new species was an Ice-Type, Leon experimentally rubbed his head against her side. "Oh wow! You're so cool!"

"Stop it!" Pietru giggled. While she had occasionally nuzzled into the wolfdog's fur while riding on his back, this was the first time he had made an attempt to return the gesture; after an age of solitude and loneliness, she found herself enjoying the sign of affection immensely. "I'm not a cool pack!"

"You kind of are."

"What's going on?" The Occuluncus still had his one eye closed to avoid turning anyone to stone. "Are we outside or is this just a particularly well lit cave?"

"Perfect!" The strange man smiled at them breezily. "Now, we don't have a lot of time so we're going to have to be quick: Sir Onemore, could you please tell the God Hound what you just saw."

"Who the hell is this?"

"A mysterious stranger."

"Ah." The Comet General nodded solemnly. "Been there. Anyway, I have bad news; remember that lense the Occuluncus was using to observe the Cullis Gate?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, we looked through it to see how the others were faring; unfortunately, Elodach's final UnFae managed to destroy the Prism before they escaped. We can no longer use it to return to Holfort."

"What!"

The sand rippled as his voice echoed for miles. Far to the north, an evil sorcerer paused his work on an eldritch abomination that would mould the world to do his bidding. "…What the hell was that?"

"To answer your next question, you are in Darhan," the man offered helpfully. "In the far north of the Desert of Hungry Insects."

"WHAT!" This one was so loud it made the evil sorcerer fly out of his window to track down the source of the disturbance. "We're in Fantasy Asia? In the part infested with giant insect monsters… which in retrospect explains those things that just tried to kill me! How… How the hell are we supposed to get back before…"

"I realise that you're under a lot of pressure right now," the man interrupted. "But I cannot stress enough how little time we have. Now: do you have something to give me?"

Leon blinked, most of his brain focused on freaking out as he imagined returning to find Holfort devastated by the Warspawn. "Why would I have something to give you?"

The man blinked mildly. "Did I not introduce myself?"

"No," grunted Pietru, rolling over and flapping her wings slowly. "You have provided negative context."

"How silly of me. I am known as Tathal the Wanderer."

He got blank looks. Moz remembered first. "Oh, of course!" The wolfdog and the Elder Dragon cocked their heads. "Remember Sister Bilan? She approached us right before we left Canaria Monastery; she gave us a scroll and asked us to give it to her father's disciple!"

Leon wracked his brain, but it had been a busy few days. "Vaguely."

The Comet General extracted the Nahul Scroll from the gem on his chest, offering it graciously; Tathal broke the seal and unfurled it, smiling sadly as he examined its contents. "Her father wrote down his teachings before his death," he muttered wistfully. "I gave this to Bilan before we parted ways." He stashed the Scroll in his pack. "Let me give you something in return."

After a bit of rummaging, Tathal pulled a large blue scale from his pack. Pietru leapt to her feet, her fur standing on end as she bared her tiny fangs. "Is that a Dragon Scale? Did this guy just pull out a goddamn Dragon Scale?"

"Sure is," smiled Tathal. He pressed the Blue Dragon Scale into Leon's chest; it sank into his fur, attaching firmly to his right pectoral. "It used to belong to the Emperor of Darhan, but his followers had it hidden away when Sun Hai seized power. I traded a snuff box for it, and it's brought me good luck."

He leaned back to admire his handiwork; the Blue Dragon Scale glowed briefly as a cool breeze washed over Leon's body, granting him some much needed relief from the desert sun. "Holy crap, this feels amazing!" He wagged his tail furiously. "Pietru, this thing is better than you are!"

"Is not!" The tiny Toa Tesukatora dove into his soft fur, squealing as the brutal heat abruptly disappeared. "Never mind! Is so!"

Tathal glanced nervously over his shoulder. "There are actually four such Dragon Scales scattered across Darhan. It's not common knowledge, but in the central square of the Imperial Capital is an inactive Fairy Gate. If you manage to find all four Dragon Scales you can unlock it and find a way back to Holfort; if you don't then you may need to take an airship, which could take months."

Leon gave him a long, suspicious look. "And where exactly did you get all this convenient information from again?"

"From Twin Pupils."

"Wha-"

"Bye."

Tathal pulled out a Scroll of Recall, which had the power to teleport its user to a location marked in advance. With a twist of his wrists he tore it in half, winking out of existence to reappear in a secluded room in the Holfort Cathedral. Waiting for him was none other than the Hierophant herself, Serbia Notre-Dame Paolo III.

"How did it go?"

"Hello to you too," grumbled Tathal, brushing the sand from his robe. "It went fine. I handed over the Blue Dragon Scale like you wanted, and I made sure they knew what to do with it. I still don't see why I couldn't just use the scroll to bring them back with me."

"That's because while he's there he's going to… that's not important." She called in someone from the next room; a tall, muscular black woman entered wearing the robes of a high ranking Canarian monk. She was missing an eye and had grim, weathered features with silver hair tied into tight cornrows. "This is Ahama, Master of Arms and one of the Six Masters of the Monastery that answers directly to Abbot Laurent. She will lead you to where the monks are hiding and reunite you with your master's daughter; after that you should evacuate before the final Warmother hatches."

Tathal gave her a suspicious look. "Thank you," he said grudgingly. "But I don't understand why you're going to all this trouble."

Serbia gave him a sweet, beautiful smile. "Do you value the safety of Miss Bilan?"

Tathal swallowed, a bead of sweat slowly dripping down his cheek. "Um… Yes?"

"Then you will not try to find out."

Back in the distant nation of Darhan, the various non-humans stared incredulously at the place where Tathal the Wanderer had disappeared. Only one person was unfazed. "You know Twin Pupils as well?" The Occuluncus had his tiny hands clasped over his face, apparently to help keep his eyes shut. "Sir? Did… Did he leave?"

"You too?" Leon blurted. "How the hell do you know Twin Pupils?"

"He was the one who hired me." The Occuluncus had a nasally, depressed voice that they all found extremely annoying to listen to. "He took me from the Faelands and asked me to guard the Cullis Gate; he even captured a few of the weaker monsters from the Desert of Hungry Insects to keep anyone entering from above ground."

"Those guys were weak?" Leon demanded. "I mean I've fought worse but still. Those guys got some good hits in."

"Why?" Sir Onemore asked. "Was he perhaps worried that Darhan would use the Cullis Gate to invade Holfort?"

"Nah. Do you remember that room with all the statues where we met?"

"Yeah."

"Apparently he had some eldritch horror or another sealed away down there. I wasn't there when it happened so I couldn't tell you what exactly it was." The Occuluncus turned its head curiously as though searching for something. "Seriously though, did he leave?"

"So there was something evil sealed away down there," said Pietru slowly. "And the cave was collapsing as we left…"

There was a long, tense silence: absolutely nothing happened.

"Huh. I guess that seal was built to last."

"Honestly, I'm a little disappointed."

"Same."

"Related note: Twin Pupils must have really known what he was doing when he locked that thing away. The Shinigami from Naruto wishes he had what he had."

They all froze as they felt it: an intense, evil presence that appeared out of nowhere. It was like what they all felt around Livia, except the exact opposite. A strange man hovered in the air overhead, his dark figure a stark contrast to the sunny blue sky. Most of his body was hidden by a billowing black cloak lined with red, which only left his clawed hands and shrivelled face visible. His eyes glowed dark red, which Leon's supernatural vision could pick up even at this distance.

The man looked sickeningly familiar.

"You've gotta be kidding me," murmured Leon. "That's not the same guy. That cannot be the same guy."

"What an ominous thing to say," observed Pietru.

"Wandering knight," the sorcerer hissed. His voice was deep and raspy, and magically carried to those of them down on the ground. "Was it you? Was it you who disturbed my work?"

"He's talking about you, isn't he?" Pietru rolled her eyes. "Why did you have to be so loud?"

"I was surprised!" Leon insisted. "Twin Pupils should have been dead for a very long time!"

"Why does he think the knight is your leader?" This time it was the Occuluncus, his snout twitching stuffily. "Bipeds are so racist."

"Doesn't matter," said Moz flatly. "It's not like anyone but the boss can hear anything I say. Watch this: HEY FATASS! COME DOWN HERE AND SAY THAT TO MY FACE!"

"You dare ignore me?" The sorcerer's talons crackled with ominous red energy.

"See."

"Why don't you try cupping your hands around your mouth," suggested the Occuluncus, having realised that Onemore could talk at unknown frequencies. "As a visual aid."

The Comet General cocked his head. "That's a good idea." He cupped his hands around the part of his helmet where a mouth would have been on a human. "HEY FATASS! COME DOWN HERE AND SAY THAT TO MY FACE!"

"What?"

"At least he knows you're trying to answer now," said Leon dryly. "I swear, this guy is the spitting image of Meio from Strider."

Pietru cocked her head. "Grandmaster Meio?"

"…Yes!" Leon blinked. "How did you…"

"Back when Laurent showed us that mural," she reminded him. "One of the children was pretending to be you, and the other one was pretending to be Grandmaster Meio."

"Ah, shit!"

"You dare mock me!" Meio floated a little closer, sounding angrier and angrier with each word he said. "I can tell you aren't really…" He trailed off, having finally caught sight of the Occuluncus. "You! I know you!"

The odd creature was clearly desperate to sneak a peek, but kept his massive eye resolutely closed. "You do?"

"Twin Pupils brought you from the Faelands in aeons past! He used you as a Guardian for… for…" Meio trailed off again, having finally realised that he was right above the sealed thingumathing. "Could it be? Could it really be?"

"Sir?" Moz spoke up nervously. "Far be it from me to judge based on first impressions, but should we really let this man-"

He was interrupted as the sorcerer blasted the sand dunes apart, lances of red lightning erupting from his fingertips to carve a hole through the desert's surface. "The last laugh is mine, my ancient adversary!" Meio gloated. "I shall claim the secrets you have hidden and make them my own! I, Grandmaster Meio shall possess all under the sky, and not even you can-"

He was blown out of the sky as Leon unleashed one of his sonic barks, a magical barrier becoming visible as it shattered from the force. "How about you back the hell off."

Meio glowered, having caught himself before he could hit the ground; he now hovered only a few feet off the ground, the sand below him whipped into slow circles. "You are no mere dog," he growled suspiciously. "What are you?"

Leon grew to his maximum size, hunkering protectively over the other three. "I identify as a wolfdog."

The glow from the sorcerer's eyes intensified as his hands crackled with arcane energy. "You-"

Without warning the landscape exploded, the blast sending everyone flying. Moz managed to grab the Occuluncus in one hand and the Elder Dragon in the other, ducking behind the enormous wolfdog before they could suffocate beneath the tsunami of sand. Meio was briefly buried before teleporting himself above ground, glowering murderously as something floated from the depths.

"So," he muttered. "This is what Twin Pupils wanted hidden."

The alien construct hovered above the desert sands, its polished chrome surface glinting in the sun. It was composed of countless polished cubes that slotted together in the shape of a sphere, with harsh gold light shining from the gaps where they intersected. The Occuluncus huffed in annoyance.

"Is it big and shiny?"

Leon blinked distractedly, still focusing on the construct. "Uh… Yeah?"

"Then it's the last defence left by Twin Pupils." He began stumbling away blindly, and they realised that he was getting clear of what came next. "The thing he locked up should be inside."

Pietru flapped her wings anxiously. "Should we run?"

"Oh no, then the sorcerer would get it!" The Occuluncus plopped himself down, having evidently reached a safe distance. "You better off smashing it, then killing the Elder Dragon inside! Then no one wins!"

If Moz had eyes then they would have bugged out of his head. "There's an Elder Dragon in there?"

As if on some kind of signal the construct transformed, the countless cubes that made up its body separating and reforming in a massive pair of arms; a ruthless right hook punched the massive wolfdog across the sands, causing him to yelp painfully as he skipped across the dunes.

"I see," murmured Meio. "That must be its weakness." A floating red sphere hovered between the mechanical arms; in modern fantasy, most golems and automata had cores that acted as power sources and convenient weak points. His logic checked out. "Die, Guardian!"

The golem turned back into a sphere as red lightning erupted from Meio's fingertips, dissipating harmlessly against its exterior. It morphed itself into a golden bird with wide wings and multiple tails, forcing the sorcerer to flee as it swooped after him; as they dove dizzyingly through the air he spotted the core now clutched between its talons, preparing himself for another blast.

The shot went wide as Moz beaned him in the back of the head with his shield, having thrown it Captain America style. "Not today, asshole!"

Meio squawked with fury, narrowly dodging the golden bird's talons. "Impudent human!" He began magically levitating the shield in place. "Know your place!"

He threw the shield back, but it never reached him: it vanished in a shimmer of blue light, reappearing in the Comet General's hands as he threw it again. Meio was caught completely off guard as it hit him in the gut, stunning him long enough for the golden bird to tackle him out of the sky.

"I miss being helpful," said Pietru sadly. "I wish I was big again."

The sorcerer snarled as the bird pinned him to the ground, a hasty barrier the only thing between him and its snapping beak. "Twin Pupils!" Meio howled. "Even from beyond the grave you get in my way!" The bird screeched as he zapped its core, retreating into the shape of a sphere; the sorcerer floated upright and blasted Moz in the chest, sending him flying with a scream only Leon could hear. "At least these newcomers are not on your level!"

The construct plopped onto the ground as if it were made of liquid, flattening into a puddle before reforming into a new shape; a thick neck rose off the ground with a draconic head at the end, the glowing red core now hovering above its forehead. With a roar it grabbed Meio between its teeth, which would have been the end of him if not for his magical shield.

"Confound you! You dare resist the mighty-" Meio cut himself off as he spotted Leon charging back into the fray, teleporting away just as his teeth fastened around the dragon's head.

The construct thrashed and roared, but its attempts to reform itself only allowed the wolfdog to get a firm grip on its core; the power source didn't stand a chance against the God Hound's fangs, shattering like glass and detonating like a bomb. The blast kicked off a localised sandstorm, causing Meio and Pietru to cry out and shield their eyes from the whipping sand. The Occuluncus smugly kept his back turned, while Moz didn't have eyes and simply placed himself protectively between Pietru and the blast site.

Leon's snout was vaporised by the blast, but it happened so suddenly that he barely felt it. More concerning was the fact that his eyes had been cooked in their sockets, rendering him temporarily blind; his tail wagged impatiently as his eyes and face regenerated, and soon the massive creature sealed away by his ancestor swam into view.

The Elder Dragon was as big as Leon at his maximum size, its body covered in bony grey plates. Its massive forelimbs were armed with powerful claws, and its chest pulsated with orange veins. Behind it swung a long, plated tail tipped with a five pointed club, and a bony fan grew from its chest to extend over its shoulders and back like false wings. Its face was narrow and canine, with bony facial armour and horns like huge antlers. Its eyes glinted as the veins on its chest began to glow.

"Guys, run!" Leon barked. "It's about to-"

A blast of concentrated, liquid fire erupted from its mouth instantly burning off three of Leon's legs; the creature turned its head and swept the blaze across the landscape, causing immense destruction and melting the sand into glass. Meio teleported away while Moz threw himself protectively over the tiny Toa, the glass forming elaborate walls around them as the sand was frozen mid-explosion.

Leon knew what this was. This came from the same place as Pietru's new form, and was on the same power level as Gogmazios.

"The Blazing Peak Dragon," he whispered. "Keoaruboru."

The Elder Dragon leapt through the air, reaching an incredible height before falling to the ground like a meteor; the landscape of glass shattered all at once from the impact, the ground rupturing beneath its weight as a dome of air pressure blasted the glass shard away like shrapnel. Leon was forced to tank the blow head on, his missing limbs preventing him from escaping.

The Keoaruboru was actually far inferior to the Fatalis and even the Lao in terms of strength and weight, so the wolfdog was left mostly unharmed by the cartoonish attack. When it picked him up in its jaws and flung him across the glass desert, it bought him enough time to regrow his missing limbs and regain his footing.

The two kaiju slowly circled one another with their hackles raised; Moz and Pietru got some distance, while Meio observed the battle from the sky above.

With a deafening roar, the titans clashed.

"Dude," the Keoaruboru muttered in his ear. "Act natural."

Leon froze in surprise - mostly from how painfully the Elder Dragon's voice reminded him of Nicks - which allowed the Keoaruboru to whack him with its paw. "What?"

"Play along!" The behemoth's voice was male, and more than a little panicked. "Don't let Meio know we're talking!"

They battled back and forth, taking advantage of their immense durability to make the fight violent and believable. "So you know that old guy?"

"Yeah, and I do not wanna be captured by him!" The Keoaruboru gored him in the chest with his antlers and flipped him over his shoulder. He waited until they were face to face again before he continued the conversation. "I need you to kill me."

Leon shrank himself down and then abruptly grew again under his opponent's body, launching him into the air. "That seems a little drastic," he remarked. "Just putting this out there: I really don't enjoy killing innocent people."

"I wouldn't really be dead!" The Keoaruboru roared, and this time Leon leapt over the fiery stream with ease. "If I die I just come back as an egg in like… like five minutes, tops! I'm like a Digimon!"

Leon actually tripped and fell over with surprise. "Holy balls! Do you have memories of your past life too?"

The Keoaruboru gasped excitedly. "Oh my god, does that mean you also-" He cut himself off as a thought occurred to him. "Quick! How did One Piece end?"

"Sorry. I don't follow One Piece."

The Elder Dragon howled in sudden rage, lunging at him with murderous fury. "YOU MOTHERFUCKER! I'LL KILL YOU!"

Leon yelped, genuinely intimidated by the sudden assault. "I was joking! I was joking!"

"NO EXCUSES!"

The Keoaruboru balled up one of his huge paws, the veins on its chest glowing as his fist was wreathed in flames; with a mighty roar he punched the wolfdog into the ground, the fire making the attack far more deadly and painful. He began to emanate a fiery aura as he began to overheat, causing parts of Leon's fur to catch alight as the air burned in his lungs.

Then Pietru was there, spewing icy breath onto the Keoaruboru's glowing chest; he roared and backed off as the orange glow subsided, the fiery aura dying down before disappearing completely. "Huan! Are you okay? Can you still fight?" She hovered anxiously around his face, crooning frantically.

"I'm fine," he coughed. "Thanks for getting me some breathing-"

Leon slapped her away with his snout just before the Elder Dragon clubbed him with his tail, sending him crashing painfully into a block of glass. Sir Onemore grabbed his tail and held it in place.

"People say my only advantage is my durability!" Moz snarled. "But that's because my real strength is in… my grip!"

He squeezed his arms around the Keoaruboru's tail, and with a final, manly battlecry the bony armour shattered; the fragments scattered across the landscape and embedded into the ground, glowing with familiar orange light. One by one they exploded, filling the air with a cloud of sand, smoke, bone dust and microscopic fragments of glass.

The battlefield fell silent as the cloud of debris hid the participants from view. Meio cautiously hovered closer, trying to figure out if they were dead.

An enormous claw lunged from the smoke, snatching the startled sorcerer out of the sky. "Gotcha!" The Keoaruboru slammed him into the ground, his chest glowing as an ungodly amount of heat began to leak from his jaws. "Everybody run!"

"Shiiiiiiiiit!" Leon fled with a yelp, Moz and Pietru already clinging to his fur. The Keoaruboru blasted Meio at point blank range, an enormous mushroom cloud erupting upwards and concealing the Elder Dragon from view. A blast of hot wind rippled outward across the sands, while the wolfdog dove behind a dune and shielded his friends from the blast.

They raised their heads as the light, heat and sound subsided, watching nervously as the smoke cleared. After a while the Keoaruboru came back into view, wagging his damaged tail happily. "I think we got him!"

He screamed in pain as a lance of red lightning hit him in the neck, fastening in place like a collar. Meio floated ominously out of the smoke, his barrier having kept him shielded and spotless. "Not bad," he sneered. "You will make an adequate attack dog."

It was then that the Occuluncus pulled himself out of a heap of sand and broken glass, blinking groggily. "What… What on earth just…"

The moment he looked at them, Meio and the Keoaruboru were turned to stone; the sorcerer plummeted anticlimactically to the ground, while the Elder Dragon immediately tried to escape. He roared as the stone around his head shattered, but his body remained firmly encased.

The Occuluncus slapped his tiny hands over his eye. "I am so sorry!"

"Dude!" Leon immediately knew he was talking to him. "Kill me! Do it now!"

"But-"

"Quickly! Before he escapes!"

Out of sheer panic he barked, narrowing the sonic blast into a concentrated point; with a wet, disgusting splat the Keoaruboru's head exploded, smearing the petrified sorcerer with gooey chunks. A headless stone statue was all that remained, the stump bleeding slowly onto the sand.

For an awful moment, Leon wondered if the Keoaruboru had lied about coming back as an egg to make him do it.

Then the headless statue began to glow, dissipating into motes of light; they gathered into an egg the size of Pietru's new, shrunken form, which floated slowly to the ground. Leon, Moz and Pietru ran to check on it, leaving the Occuluncus to rock back and forth muttering to himself.

"Woah!" The Comet General caught the egg before it could land on the destroyed ground, cradling it protectively to his chest. "So, I'm guessing the two of you came to an understanding at some point."

"Yeah," gasped Leon, his heart pounding as the adrenaline drained from his body. "He didn't want to be captured, and said he would come back as an egg anyway."

Sir Onemore cradled the egg to his chest. "Thank you for saving my master," he whispered.

"What about him?" Pietru nodded at the frozen sorcerer. "Is he still alive?"

Leon slammed his paw down and smashed the statue into dust. "Doesn't look like there's a body in there. I'm guessing he teleported out."

"You guess correctly." At some point Meio had appeared behind them; he was holding the Occuluncus by the scruff of his neck, his face pointed firmly away from him. "While the loss of the Elder Dragon is unfortunate, taking the Guardian chosen personally by Twin Pupils shall be a welcome consolation prize. I look forward to dissecting your secrets."

Realising that hadn't heard them talking, Moz discreetly hid the egg behind his back.

The freezing axe flew out of goddamn nowhere, swooping murderously for the back of Meio's head; it froze in place as he telekinetically grabbed it, bringing it around to his face so he could examine it. "A sapient axe?" He blinked with bemusement. "Sure, why not?"

Leon lunged at him, but he teleported away. "Asshole!" Pietru snarled. "Who the hell was that guy anyway?"

"Well, he called himself Grandmaster Meio and you two clearly recognised the name. Maybe work backwards from that." Moz pulled the egg out from behind his back, holding it like one would a baby.

"The Wolf wasn't the only thing the monks saw in my future," said Leon slowly. "Do you remember the mural?"

"Of course I do," nodded Pietru. "The monsters in it turned out to be the Warspawn that attacked us outside the Blood Barrier."

"Right. And in the same room, one of the kids was playing around and pretending to be Grandmaster Meio. If you add in the three dreams that the Abbot, the Prioress and the Chamberlain told us about, that makes five things they saw happen to me in my future. Five things I'm guaranteed to go through before the Wolf punches my ticket. Five ticks to midnight."

"Four, at this point," said Moz dryly. "What's your point?"

"My point is this little skirmish wouldn't even register with those kids compared to the other crap they must have seen me do!" Leon insisted. "That means it's pretty much guaranteed that I'm going to bump into that guy again, and I am really, really not a fan of letting it happen on his terms."

Pietru's tail began to wag eagerly. "So you want to go after him? Right now?"

"Yep." A low growl rumbled in Leon's chest, the Blue Dragon Scale glowing softly. "I say we go north to Nahul, kick down his door and beat on him until he cries like a little girl."

"Seconded!" Moz declared.

"Then we rescue the axe, and I guess also that other guy, and track down the Dragon Scales that Tathal told us about. Then we go to the Imperial Capital, open the Fairy Gate, cruise on back to Holfort and bite Elodach's head off! Cake!"

"Yeah!" Pietru squealed. "An adventure! A real adventure! I… What's that?"

Leon blinked and followed her gaze; far off in the horizon, an immense black cloud was rising from the desert and covering the sky. And heading their way.

"That would be the reason they call this the Desert of Hungry Insects!" Leon said shrilly. "We should run!"

"But-"

"Run!"

Moz leapt onto Leon's back, holding Pietru and the egg in place as he fled across the sand at top speeds.

Far below, the Warmother finally dug itself from the rubble. It chewed up and swallowed the arm still clutched in its jaws, which was all that remained of the cone that had tackled it into the depths. Its crest quivered with glee when it spotted the massive clutch of luminescent eggs, squirreled away by the bizarre creature it had fought alongside the wolfdog. It began to make loud, disgusting noises as it guzzled itself on the helpless young.

With each egg it devoured, a new, four legged creature sprouted from its back like a tumour and rolled across the cavern floor.

Its mission was clear: establish an army of Warspawn, then use them to prevent the God Hound's return to Holfort.

No matter the cost.

Side Quest: Tathal the Wanderer

Summary: a side quest from Summoner, acquired in Iona Monastery. The quest is given by Sister Bilan, who Leon first met back in Chapter 18. As you may remember, the job is to deliver the Nahul Scroll to Tathal, a disciple of her father; it is actually impossible to complete the quest until arriving in Orenia (essentially the setting's Wutai) whereupon Tathal is encountered randomly in the desert.

If you ever play this game, you should know that there are three random encounters in the desert worth looking at: the first is Tathal, whose reward (the Blue Dragon Scale) is needed to complete a late game side quest. The second contains the Summoner's Necklace, which I never use but which can technically be considered to be part of Joseph's ultimate equipment. Finally is a merchant, who sells the Debasser.

I cannot emphasise enough how much I love this weapon. Even though you can get it so early I tend to make it the final weapon for Jekhar, and occasionally Joseph when I forget the Sword of the Summoners.

The place where Leon arrives is the first location of Chapter 4 of Chains of Satinav, where Geron meets the Occuluncus for the first time. I mentioned back in Chapter 31 that this was in a fairy gate; unlike Leon, Geron really did end up in the Faelands.

The creatures that attack them come from an excellent webtoon called Moon Slayer, which has some of the best monster designs I've seen in a while. Expect to see it come up again. The first creature first appears in Chapter 28, but isn't properly introduced until Chapter 33.

The name of the desert is actually original, but the general idea came from the Insect Planet from Iron Ladies. If you want an early peek at what's lurking out there, it first appears in Chapter 16.

Grandmaster Meio is the main villain of Strider, as mentioned by Leon. The automaton he unleashes is the Angelic Golem from Bayonetta, while the Keoaruboru is from Monster Hunter Frontier. That makes it the second Elder Dragon from Frontier to make an appearance, after Pietru's new form as a Toa Tesukatora.

Now, an explanation.

The reason this chapter took such a long time to come out was because when I reviewed my notes for Part 4, I decided it was boring. Part 3 was essentially one protracted fetch quest, but I still had fun writing it because it had most of the story's character development crammed into it. It's quite fitting that the first time someone declared they had a favourite chapter they chose Chapter 7, which is basically just Leon, Julius and Jilk (and Caesar) hanging out.

The problem was that Leon is the only one of the main trio present for the Exile; after spending Part 1 establishing a personality for the main character, Part 2 was about developing the relationship between Leon and Livia. Because she initially hid the fact that she could talk to animals, Part 3 was about Angie and Livia. Because the latter was captured by Elodach, this meant I could spend Part 5 focusing on Angie and Leon while Part 4 was left as filler.

Turns out I really hate filler.

I brought this up to a friend, and they pointed me to an obscure fanfiction that was essentially a crossover between Re:Monster and Highschool DxD; the author of this story essentially takes the Nemesis system from the Shadow of Mordor and uses it to make a Villain Gallery for his main character to fight.

Honestly, I really liked this idea. Especially the idea of having the entire Villain Gallery team up Sinister Six style at the end of the arc. At the very least, this should give Holfort enough time to be properly decimated by the time he gets back. It also gave me what I desperately needed: an overarching theme for the arc.

As I mentioned earlier, the theme for Part 1 was establishing Leon as a character, while 2, 3 and 5 were each dedicated to two of the main trio. Part 4 shall henceforth be focused on giving Leon transferable skills - not power or abilities, but skills - that will still be useful when he inevitably turns back into a human.

None supernatural skills that are as useful for a dog as they are to a human are in surprisingly short supply. Can you guess what I went with?