In the vast Apeseed Oil Flower Fields of Kongo Bongo Island
"Come on Diddy, we need to harvest all of the seeds before sundown or we're really gonna find out while they call my dad "Cranky Kong"" said Donkey Kong.
"I'm trying DK" said Diddy Kong, wiping the evermore increasing sweat on his forehead. Both of the apes had been working hard all day at the strikingly brown Apeseed Oil Flower Fields that Cranky owned. A large gust of wind toppled the ladder onto DK, and nearly swept Diddy off of his feet.
"Wind's pickin up" said Diddy
"You don't say. Now come on, help me get this thing off of me" grunted a clearly struggling DK. Diddy heaved the ladder off of DK and helped him onto his feet. The wind blew even harder this time, knocking DK over again and subsequently the ladder onto DK.
"OH COME ON!" cried DK. Diddy once again lifted the ladder off of DK but then a gust of wind from a different direction rolled both of them and the ladder over and down into the gully that cut through the fields.
"Uh oh" said Diddy.
"WHAT NOW!" said DK. Diddy nodded his head towards where the gully was heading to.
"Oh no" gulped DK. The gully was heading towards an apeseed silo.
"Holy fucking shit DK, what are we gonna do?" cried Diddy.
"I know what to do" said DK. DK let out something akin to a cross between a whale call and a monkey holler. Within seconds of his vocalisation, an ape bigger than anything anyone had ever seen before stepped into the apeseed silo and turned the emergency manual override stop button and grabbed DK and Diddy just before they were about to get dispersed into the apeseed silo.
"Diddy, I'm going to introduce you to my long lost brother, Donkey King Kong" smiled DK.
"He's got to be at least six hundred feet tall" beamed a bamboozled Diddy as DKK put him down. DKK began to beat his chest and let out a mighty roar.
"So how he is your long lost brother?" asked Diddy.
"DK mamaps and papaps having some issues before I born. Mamaps make me with King Kong. That how I lost brother" said DKK.
"Are you kidding me?! All this time you had a six hundred foot tall ape as a brother and never bothered to tell me?!" cried Diddy.
"Diddy, it was not in my place-" DK began before being cut off by Diddy.
"No no, let's just forget about it, keep more secrets from me" Diddy said sarcastically. "Now let's figure out how to get back home with this big guy on our hands".
"Or on my hands" DKK chuckled.
In the skies of Yoshi's Island through a mysterious storm
"Almost there Boshi. But she's about to run out of fuel, and this storm doesn't look too hot" said Tropix.
"Almost where?" asked Boshi.
"Point Thunder. You didn't actually think that I was going to set you free just yet did you" smirked Tropix.
"Even after I saved your life?" said Boshi.
"After this journey's over you'll be a new man, and Yoshi will see that you've changed your ways and will release you" said Tropix. Boshi rolled his eyes in response.
"Where to now?" he asked.
"Well seeing as we are in the Plains of Paradise, we might as well stop for something to eat and drink" said Tropix.
"Plains of Paradise?" questioned a very puzzled Boshi.
"Well, beyond the Funnel of Acupor is known to behold rich lands of beauty and bountifulness, but very few have actually been here. Oh this brings me back to my rookie days" said Tropix.
"Looks like there's some fruit over there" said Boshi, pointing to a fruit stand.
"Ah yes, the brown yoshis, well known for their vast array of crop produce" said Tropix. They walked over to the vendor.
"Ooh and they have Acuporian Carrot Salt Limes" said Tropix as he bit into one" said Tropix. Boshi gagged. Tropix looked at him with a face of disarray.
"What, you don't like your vegetables sour and salty sometimes. Man up a bit blue boi" chuckled Tropix. Boshi smacked Tropix over the back of the head with a Paddle Persimmon.
"Ow jeez!" said Tropix. "Time to belly up blue boi".
"Hmm. What fruit has the most sugar to fat ratio?" asked Boshi. Tropix then smacked him over the back of the head.
"It's sir idiot!" scolded Tropix.
"Ok, what has the most sugar to fat ratio sir?" asked Boshi.
"Hmm, well that would have to be the Pudding Pineapple or the Smelly Soursop, which as you guessed provides a very distinct smell because of it fermenting fat. And call me Vendor Orooroorogulus please" said the vendor.
"Ok, erm, Orooroorogulus -" said Boshi before once again being smacked on the back of the head by Tropix.
"WILL YOU CUT THAT OUT!" shouted Boshi. "Erm, Vendor Orooroorogulus, how much will it cost for twenty of each plus a bottle of protein chewies" said Boshi.
"About fifteen coins" said Vendor Orooroorogulus.
"Done" said Tropix as he handed Vendor Orooroorogulus the coins.
"Would you like to donate to my brother's charity fund for the sick yoshi children?" said Vendor Orooroorogulus
"Sure thing said Tropix as he handed Vendor Orooroorogulus some extra coins.
"Thanks Tropix. And you must be….. Boshi. Well I sure haven't seen you in a while. How time just flies" said Vendor Orooroorogulus.
"Always a pleasure visiting your shop" said Tropix as he loaded up the fruits into his food sack.
"Who was that?" inquired Boshi.
"That my blue buddy is Perigulus's brother" said Tropix. "Oh you've got so much catching up to do blue boi".
The two then left for Point Thunder.
"How far to Point Thunder?" asked Boshi.
"About 10 kilometres" said Tropix.
Eventually the two reached the harsh destination. It was a beach with deep black water, mile high sand dunes and intense heat. There was a storm thrashing the coast which covered the sky with green clouds.
"Ooh this storm REALLY doesn't look too good. Fuck it's hot. Aren't you sweating your ass off?" said Tropix.
"Nah I kind of like this weather, where I'm from this is nothing" said Boshi. Tropix raised an eyebrow.
"It's 35C and 75% humidity. How are you not hot" said a sweaty Tropix as he was checking his weather gauge.
"Well, at Blue Sky Bay, the name doesn't lie. It is sunny practically all year round and in summer, 35C and 75% humidity would be a lovely day for us. 50C is the norm during summer. It's because we live near the Island's Heat Exhaust" said Boshi.
"Fuck me you are one hell of a crazy motherfucker blue boi" said Tropix.
"Uh oh" Boshi gulped as he pointed towards the sea. A great, large waterspout was right in their path.
"Don't worry, I know what to do" said Tropix. He pulled out a Folding Island Satellite Dish Storm Shield from his jetbackpack and pulled up the antenna. He opened up a computer which controlled the weather and began to boot up the operating system.
"Woah, you have the Climate Computer? I thought that that stuff was legend!" said Boshi.
"Oh my blue buddy you have quite a bit of learning to do" said Tropix. "Let's see, add 50% extra charge to the lightning bolts, increase tornadic spin by 28%, vaporize the hail upon impact".
"WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU MAKE IT WORSE FOR CRYING OUT LOUD?" yelped Boshi.
"Because it's the only way that we will get out of here, I remembered that I forgot to bring the spare fuel tank. She needs a power surge to get us through to Clock Rock Mountain" said Tropix.
"But how will that work if the engine runs on petrol?" asked Boshi.
"Because we aren't flying. We're riding blue boi" said Tropix. He pulled out a great big sandboard and secured it onto the jetpack and clicked in the Climate Computer into it's mount.
"Holy cow is that a sandboard-" Boshi began.
"Yes yes it is now will ya just pipe down with the questions for one damn measly minute" said Tropix. The shield began to shake and flash with light the waterspout neared closer.
"You'd better strap on tight my blue man, cause I'm putting this baby into Shell Drive. Manual Shell Drive, so it's gonna be even rougher" said Tropix. Boshi's jaw dropped.
"What, you think that if I have a sandboarding jetpack, the shield and a climate computer I wouldn't have Shell Drive" said Tropix. Boshi buckled in the harness around Tropix and Tropix locked the harness life support belt back onto the jetpack. It was now starting to shake harder and harder, and then a burst of green sparks blew out the back as Tropix pounded his foot on the accelerator and the machine floored it into the sand dunes, firing out green exhaust flames as it traversed up and down the sand dunes.
"Havin fun my blue buddy" said Tropix as he swayed the board around bumpy dunes. Boshi looked at him with a grave look on his face and began belching and rocking backwards and forwards.
"Oh no, don't you even think about it you blue bitch-" Tropix began before Boshi vomited all over Tropix.
"OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD IT'S IN MY EYES" cried Tropix. "I CAN'T SEE" he said as he lost control of the board. The gears then began to lockup.
"WOAHOAH" the duo bellowed as they began to move aimlessly through the dunes.
"I see a red button" Boshi began.
"YES YES JUST PRESS THE BLOODY THING IT'S THE AUTOBOARD" said Tropix. Boshi pushed the button and the gears unlocked and released the pressure and the board went back to traversing at a normal level.
"So tell me, why do you have a high power sandboard and Climate Computer in the first place. And what's with the illegal boosters" said Boshi.
"I like to play around with the weather and challenge myself riding" said Tropix.
"But then aren't you risking dying from an injury, unless you bring 1-UPs" Boshi began.
"Yes of course I bring 1-Ups. And next time you're going to throw up, do it in this bag" said Tropix as he handed Boshi a large bag.
"Thanks. Oh and I think that I can see our destination coming up" said Boshi as he pointed towards shifty rock tabletop mountains.
Meanwhile, at Tree Top Taunt, deep in the Toadwood Forest, located near the Hidden Harbour.
"So who's this "Bobby" you speak of?" asked Mario as he was on the phone to King Boo.
"I'm glad that you asked that" King Boo smiled with glee. "He is my right hand man, but not many outside of the Spectral World know of him. He is perhaps the most brilliant mind and heart I have ever seen. I recall there was one occasion where a boo called Ruffles who he would bet with at motorsport venues, and who slipped and landed on a branch while diving off a cliff at the California Mansion in the Real World, and so he gave him CPR and then hauled him all the way back to the main town centre hospital for surgery and nursed him in his home for several weeks. He then gave him 5000 coins to go on a trip to Hawaii and now they are good friends. He will definitely be able to help you with your mission to keep Waluigi safe and able to restore the Emerald of Peace. Anyway, I've got a hot date waiting for me so we'll have to wrap it up here. Toodle-oo" giggled King Boo.
A seahorn then sounded as the ferry came to the docks. The docks surrounded a beautiful yet eerily quiet ocean inlet. A large, white belly struggled to squeeze it's way out of the door. It was none other than Yoshi, and he had clearly been gaining weight. He exhaled some smoke from his mouth as he walked the jetty.
"Joint?" he said to a lonely looking Luigi sitting by the docks staring into the tranquil, clear waters of the harbour.
"No thanks I'm good. Been putting on a bit of extra padding there ay Yoshi" said Luigi.
"Do I need to show you my belly button again" said Yoshi. Luigi nodded no in fear. Yoshi climbed the vast array of treetop bridges, ladders, houses, tunnels, stairs, platforms, swings and just about every other obstacle that you can think of and finished with a flutter jump and a fart as he reached the top.
"OH MOTHER OF MUSHROOM IT STINKS!" cried Mario, wafting Yoshi's gauche gut gases away from his nose.
"Did you consult Bobby?" asked Yoshi.
"Yes, I sent him a royal decree letter-" Mario began before being cut off by Yoshi.
"Pfft a royal decree letter what you think he's just going to come here and kiss your ass like that-do you know who you are dealing with Mario?" eyebrowed Yoshi.
"Uh oh" pointed Mario. A submarine had just risen from near underneath the docks and a large boo exited the hatch.
"Is he going to?-" Mario began.
"Uh-huh" said Yoshi.
Luigi then screamed as Bobby jumped out of the water and gave Luigi an atomic wedgie and then flipped him into the water. Bobby rubbed his hands and levitated to the top of the taunt. He extended his hand to Mario and Mario shook it before yelping in pain and retracting his hand away from Bobby's hand with exceptional speed.
"Bahaha the electric shock jelly never fails" cackled Bobby. "Now Yoshi, before we begin our discussion, is he going to challenge my experience? Because I just introduced myself to Boo and he did as such" said Bobby.
"No, I've already asserted to him the importance of not doing that" said Yoshi.
"So, Mr. Mario, Ruler Yoshi, what would you like to discuss? Reconnaissance rescue missions? Extragalactic conquest assistance? Special Spectral Supply Trade?" said Bobby as he clasped his hands.
"How about how we will keep Waluigi from getting captured, what means of warfare we will use against Bowser in doing so and how we will map this out?" said Mario.
"Heh, well you see, we do not use warfare. It is the official stance that us boos maintain neutrality and peacekeeping in times of conflict. However we can prescribe you peaceful ghost sorcery charms to protect yourselves, aid you in the rescue of Kooper and we can also offer you planning to ensure that Waluigi returns the Emerald of Peace to its Surgut Stone and in preventing Bowser from thwarting Waluigi's quest" said Bobby.
"Ok, well what do you suggest then?" asked Mario.
"Hmm. Well, we have little means of outreach to help Waluigi on the Islands of Magic, so first let's begin preparing for when he arrives at Freezeport in Iceland. Bowser will most likely use the most advanced and extensive means of warfare that he has in his ploy to take the emerald. First, he will most likely ambush Waluigi when he arrives at Freezeport by sending in his most elite ground troops, the Shell Squad-S and as means of a second line of defence, using snowmines" said Bobby.
"Go on" said Mario.
"So we plant a bounce along the nearest patches of coast to Freezeport. Secondly, I will send in some of my best hand plucked sorcerers to use a Kang's Charm, our most powerful repellent charm, to blow them back the moment they reach about 500 metres from the coast. Next, I will render the snow chemically unreactive to Fireblasters, the explosives he is most likely to use, and to pile up the snow and ice so that there is more for them to dig even if he bypasses both" said Bobby.
"What's a bounce?" asked Mario.
"It's sort of like a force field. Don't worry, we will have that all figured out" said Bobby. "Next, he will use Koopa Cloud Clan Satellites to determine Waluigi's location and also to alter the weather and navigation in order to cause him to become lost. We will use our Vibe Sceptor to create a power surge to wipe out their power, and in case they have a Backup Battery, to alter their sensory system. We will also infect the cyber network with viruses to block connection to ground and orbit operators".
"What about the ocean voyage to Ice Land?" asked Mario.
"Ah, I like the way you think Mario. Getting rid of the satellites will stop them from being able to communicate with each other across the ocean as satellite is the only method in those particular seas. However, as a preventative measure, Yoshi has agreed to use the Climate Computer to manipulate ocean currents to create impermissible weather and to warm the water to weaken the ship's metal" said Bobby.
"And as for the Islands of Magic?" asked Mario.
"Well, like I said, there is little I can do, but one thing is certain. The Island Bed is rumoured to have the ability to turn the islands invisible, however this can only be done once the Catcher of the Eye Emerald is collected. However, such a drastic decision could lead to dire consequences, so it is at the discretion of Barry to do this" said Bobby.
"But what if Bowser manages to overcome all of these defences my good friend" asked Yoshi.
"I'm afraid I can't help you anymore at that point, as we refuse to use means of fatal combat to intervene" said Bobby.
"Thank you for being part of the team" said Mario.
"And thank you for consulting me Mario" said Bobby.
"I'll sign and release the authorisation" sighed Peach. "Toadsworth". Toadsworth was sound asleep on his rocking chair.
"Toadsworth. Toadsworth!" Peach said as she prodded him. Peach rolled her eyes and sighed. "TOADSWORTH!".
"GAH" cried a now awakened Toadsworth.
"Princess!" Mario gasped. Peach furrowed her brows at him.
"Toadsworth, we need you to authorise some operations on behalf of myself and Bobby, a high ranking spectral special duty soldier to King Boo. Bobby is authorised to act on behalf of King Boo when the spectral king is not within his direct presence. Yoshi will send the command and you will get into contact with King Richard and Princess Daisy on behalf of myself and the kingdom" said Peach.
Mario and Luigi scratched their heads in nervousness.
"What? What have you two eggheads done now" said Peach.
"It's not what we've done. It's what he's done-" Luigi began before being cut of by a hollering screech and a sharp sound blasting from the Royal Telephone causing all of them to jump in shock. To their right was Bobby and Yoshi laughing like hyenas. Bobby had secretly set the telephone to the loudest possible volume and on speakerphone.
"Very funny butt for brains, now come on we've got a lot of work and preparing to do" said Peach.
"Bro where did you learn to pull pranks like this?" said Yoshi.
"I was raised in the mountains of California in the real world at our largest real world mansion, I met all sorts of boos there who I learnt from and engaged in pranking wars with" said Bobby.
"Ooh California I've always wanted to visit California. What's it like there?" asked Yoshi.
"It's awesome, we've got everything-Pfeiffer Big Sur, Death Valley, Mount Whitney, San Fran, LA, Fresno, Disney World" said Bobby.
"Woah you've hiked Mount Whitney? That's the highest peak in the lower 48" said Yoshi. "That must have been such a gorgeous and breathtaking adventure".
"Yeah it was good fun except I got stuck for a week after I came down with Boobonic Plague" said Bobby.
"Don't you mean "bubonic"" asked Mario.
"No I mean Boobonic. It's a type of plague exclusive to boos. I got it after a prairie dog scratched me" said Bobby.
"That must have sucked King Koopa's stinky ass" said Yoshi.
"Yeah it wasn't fun, I had to pop the buboes while I was in my tent with nothing to eat but sushi. Worst week of my life" said Bobby. Everyone cringed at the buboes part.
"Come on guys, we need to get ready. Bowser will stop at nothing to foil Waluigi's plans" said Peach.
Meanwhile, on a "peacefully calm sandy shore"
"Where are we?" asked Waluigi.
"The sundial must have sent us to the next island. This is the Island of Weird Weather and Wildlife" said Admiral Bobbery as he looked at the map.
"Doesn't seem so weird to me, it's balmy and the sea couldn't be calmer-" Waluigi began before being cut off by Admiral Bobbery.
"DON'T SAY IT MATEY" Bobbery boomed but it was too late. The sea turned from calm and clear to dark and wavy, the air turned cold and windy and the sky turned dark and cloudy and started snowing as it blasted thunder.
"SNOW? ON A TROPICAL ISLAND? WHAT IS THIS FOR CRYING OUT LOUD" wailed Waluigi.
"I tried to warn ye" said Admiral Bobbery.
We'd better take cover
"Right you are Retainus. Quick, I see a hut over there about 500 yards away" said Waluigi. They dashed for the hut but by the time they arrived the door was locked. Just as they arrived they tried opening the door but it was locked.
"Come on please somebody help us let us in" said Waluigi as he banged on the door continually. Just as they were about to lose hope, the door whipped open and a hand yanked the three of them inside.
In the Wind Flower Fields
"Whew, we've been looking for food all day. When are we going to find something" said a sweating and sunburnt Jeff. Then something caught his eye. "What's that?".
"It looks like a Wind Chicken trying to feed her hatchlings with some Orange Bananas" said Hal as he looked up at a ginormous tree.
"But how will we get it down from there?" asked Jeff.
"Allow me" said Hal. He stuck his hands out and began applying his powers from using the wind flower to suck the bird, it's nest and the bananas towards him. He then peacefully put it out of it's misery.
"Nice" said Jeff. "But what are we going to do with the eggs? The hatchlings have already hatched" .
"We're going to make balut" said Hal. Jeff gagged.
"No but seriously it tastes so good-" Hal began.
"THAT'S ENOUGH" said Jeff
"After we've bellied up there's something that we need to do. And I think that you know what it is" said Hal. Jeff nodded.
Through the deep, thick rainforests of Kongo Bongo Island
"Well, how are we going to get him back to papaps. He will really live up to the name Cranky Kong when he reacts to the predicament that we are in" said Diddy Kong.
"Well we're just gonna have to improvise" said Donkey Kong.
"DKK have idea" said DKK.
"Go on" said DK.
"Diddy go to papaps while me and brother DK go to the temple. Then you bring papaps and he meets uis there" said DKK.
"Good thinking DKK" said DK.
At the spinning tabletops of the Clock Rock Mountains
"Wow this place really gives me vertigo" said Boshi.
"Well get used to it, because you have a lot of training ahead of you. Let's start with some simple exercises. How about a spinning wham kick?" said Tropix as he attached a boxing bag to the top of a rope connected to the branch hanging from the overarching cliff above.
Boshi rolled his eyes. "And you really think that that's a simple exercised?" Boshi asked sarcastically. Tropix then smacked him over the back of the head.
"OW! Will you stop bloody doing that!" said Boshi, rubbing his head.
"Are you left or right legged and handed?" asked Tropix.
"Right" said Boshi.
"Good. Then start by putting the weight on your left heel, then spinning around and using the back of your right foot to kick the bag. I won't let you stop until it's broken off" said Tropix. Boshi tried kicking the bag off of the rope but the first go was unsuccessful.
The second attempt wasn't much better. He ended up stretching his leg quite painfully. "I can't do this" he said. Tropix them proceeded to slap him in the face.
"Try harder" said Tropix. Boshi kicked the bag for a third time and this time he broke it off of the cliff.
"I did it. I FUCKING DID IT!" cried Boshi happily.
"I knew you had it in ya kid. Now let's move onto the next task" said Tropix as he poined above. Boshi looked up and gulped. Up above him was a tree branch course, and one wrong slip could mean dire consequences.
"You're gonna swing like a monkey all the way to the top" said Tropix.
"Come on Boshi, you can do this" muttered Boshi. He flung his way carefully with immense strength until his foot slipped as the rock wall crumbled causing the tree branch to collapse and fall off. Boshi scrambled with every inch of his lifeforce that he could, managing to reach the top. He saw a rainbow road, with a dispensary box that had power pops in it.
"Hmm. This could give me the energy to complete this run" speculated Boshi. He was then hit in the head by a bag of coins that Tropix tossed up to him. Boshi put the coins in the machine and ate his power pops, then began running gracefully along the track. He was beginning the pick up speed, leaping from floating rock to floating rock, and the finish line was in sights.
"Come on Boshi, you're almost there, you can do this! You're the fastest man on the island!" said Tropix as Boshi began sprinting. He just made it over the finish line before tripping over a rock, then slip sliding all the way to the edge. He gulped as he stopped just in time to secure safety.
"Didn't think you had it in you kid, but after today, you've proved yourself to be pretty adept at this sort of thing. I think you have a real knack for athletics" said Tropix.
"You don't say" smirked Boshi.
Meanwhile, in the hut
"Who are you?" asked Waluigi.
"I am Grand Gooper Blooper, the greatest blooper to ever roam the special seas. I know your friend Retainus here from early school days" said this unusually large striped blooper. "And I think that I have what you need".
"And what would that be?" Waluigi said with a raising eyebrow. Gooper reached into the chest with his tentacles and pulled out an emerald.
"This, my dear lads, is the Emerald of Wild" said Gooper. Waluigi leaned in to grab it but Gooper slapped his hand away and tucked it away in the chest.
"Uh uh uh. You must play a game first" said Gooper.
"Ok. What is it that this game is?" asked Waluigi. Gooper pulled out a puzzle board and a sack of puzzle pieces.
"If you can find out what these pieces make, I'll give you the emerald" said Gooper. Waluigi looked closely at the pieces.
"Hmm" he pondered. Then he saw that they were glowing. "Ah I know what this is. It's a Glow Jelly" said Waluigi as he put the pieces together. It was, in fact, a Glow Jelly.
"Wha-what. There is no way that you could have gotten that right. Two for three?" said Gooper.
"Be my guest" said Waluigi. Gooper then pulled out a word jumble. It read "yin km snp ik". He then smelt a lovely smell of sea poppies.
"My ink is pink…..?" said Waluigi as he pieced the letters together.
"Rats! Ok you must pass one final challenge" said Gooper. "If you can beat me in an arm wrestle, no cheating, then I will relinquish the emerald" said Gooper.
Waluigi got his arm ready and held Gooper's tentacle. Initially he was sure that he would lose, but he powered back with incredible strength. The two were going at it for a solid two hours, until Gooper began showing signs of tiredness.
"Must, not, lose" said a sweating Gooper before finally being defeated by Waluigi.
"No" he slammed his hand onto the table. "No one ever beats me at armwrestling. Alright, here's your emerald" he said as he pulled out a white emerald, but it was so shiny and bright that you couldn't see the actual emerald.
"Pleasure playing with you" said Waluigi.
"Likewise. Enjoy your day, goodbye friends of Retainus" said Gooper.
At the Temple of Bananas
"So how's life been treating you big guy" said DK.
"Eh, not too bad. Mamaps make me banana pudding and hot cocoa when she read me stories" said DKK.
"Mmm I love banana pudding and hot cocoa" said DK.
"What in god's name are you two doing out here at the temple" barked Cranky Kong.
"Well, it's a long story" DK began before being cut off by Cranky.
"Silence! That's enough! Young Diddy Kong told me everything.
"So what is it that we must do with him?" asked DK.
"Well, he would make an excellent protector for guarding the Crystal Coconut. The temple complex is big enough to fit him and there is TV and food. What do you say DKK-does that sound good?" said Cranky. DKK nodded.
In a very large, very deep turquoise lake.
"So what's in this island in the middle of this lake?" asked Waluigi.
"Legend has it that vicious vicunas inhabit this island inside an island, and that there is a jacket made of their fur that will protect you from any level of cold and blizzard. However, they're bloody vicious creatures they are and will stop at nuthin to tear ye to shreds" said Admiral Bobbery.
"Well that boat has a rifle in it" said Waluigi as he pointed at a raft.
"Better be careful that the flying crocs don't roll us over matey" said Admiral Bobbery. Waluigi navigated the boat to the island, but felt something rocking it from beneath.
"No no dis isn't how I wanted to die me purple boy" cried Admiral Bobbery.
"We're not going to die said Waluigi, who had just strapped on a weapons vest. Just as the crocodile was about to devour them Waluigi threw a grenade into it's jaws of which it had just opened. The crocodile's head exploded and flew so far from it's body that it blew the rest of it's body back to dry land. Waluigi then parked the boat onto the smaller island. He looked around, before hearing a Giant Ear Screamer Bat that was flying right in his direction. He ducked before pulling a knife from out of a tree hollow as it had been used by previous tribes for hunting, and slew the bat in one go.
"WATCH OUT MATEY" yelped Admiral Bobbery. Waluigi felt something prick his foot and jumped up in a fright. It was a Pincher Wincher Crab, known for pinching and winching out the flesh from whomever it's unsuspecting victim was, which snapped it's claws around like a ninja. There were now hordes of them arising from the ground surrounding Waluigi. Retainus sunk into the ground and the ground began to heat up as he breathed fire, causing the crabs to scuttle away.
"Yeesh that was close" said Waluigi.
You tell me
The trio hiked for a bit and trodded through the mangroves, until they heard something following them. It was a Tropical Bear, and it did not look happy.
"Uh oh" Waluigi said nervously. The bear lunged at them, and although Admiral Bobbery and Retainus moved out the way in time, Waluigi was not so lucky. The bear pinned him to the ground and slashed his chest with it's claws.
"Get… of… me… you… fucker" he heaved as he wrestled the bear off of him. He struck the bear with a knockout blow, putting the bear to sleep for some time. After that they left, but Waluigi began to feel sick.
"Ugh. I don't feel… so good" said Waluigi. Retainus looked through him and saw that his ribs were developing black blotches and emitting an unpleasant odor, and his esophagus was glowing green and his heart was beginning to give out.
You have an infection that is eating away at your ribs that has spread to your heart and esophagus. You will die in a matter of an hour if you do not treat it. Tropical Bears are known for harbouring some deadly pathogens. I can disinfect the wound but you will need a piece of the Regeneration Fruit to heal the wounds
"Ok. Go ahead" said Waluigi. Retainus licked his wounds and then pulled a Regeneration Fruit from Waluigi's rucksack and fed it to him slowly.
"But what about the pain?" Waluigi asked.
I'll give you some Opium. The Morphine and Codeine in it will take away the pain. I will also give you some Refreshroom, a 1-UP and a Life Mushroom to get you back on your feet.
Admiral Bobbery fished through the rucksack to pull out the ingredients needed. He made them into a potion and poured it into a cup. Waluigi drunk it slowly. Eventually, after a day, he was completely healed. However their journey was still far from over. The weather was beginning to heat up, and Admiral Bobbery saw smoke coming from the volcano at the centre of the island. The volcano began to spit and sputter lava.
"Argh, looks like there's a fire. Conditions are just right for it. Volcano is shootin out lava" said Admiral Bobbery. "Legend has it that at the top of the volcano there's a deck with a dresser there. I suspect that that's where we'll find the Vicious Vicuna Fur Snowsuit"
But there was still a river to cross. They took a boat, but the Fleshstrippers of the Tropics were beginning to peel away the foundation of the boat. It looked like all hope was lost, until Waluigi saw two ropes poking out of the storage box in the boat. He lassoed it onto a tree, then lassoed it onto the other one, and they climbed on the rope to safety as the fatal fish devoured the boat.
The trio then did some more hiking, until they reached a bluff. There was a ledge that could take them to the top of the volcano, however it appeared that the only way for them to reach it was to scramble across the face of the bluff. Retainus let them hope on his back and he slithered across the volcanotops until they reached a shonky looking . They crossed the drawbridge but it broke in half before they reached the end.
"BOBBERY" yelled Waluigi. Luckily for Admiral Bobbery, Retainus swayed his tail just in time to save the sea captain. They reached the stone tabletop before hearing growling and seeing red eyes appear from from all directions. The Vicious Vicunas had trailed them and then started frolicking around them until they had them woozy and tired, and then surrounding them like the pack of wild animals that they were. Retainus and Admiral Bobbery had no idea how Waluigi was going to get them out of this one. But Waluigi had an idea.
"As these creatures hone, volcano stone, you must break like scone" chanted Waluigi. The ground beneath them began to shake violently and eventually the out rim of the tabletop crumbled into the lava, causing the vicious vicunas to fall into a fiery demise into the lava.
"Blimey that's some bloody good magic ye've got there" said Admiral Bobbery. They then reached the dresser and looked through it.
"Argh let's see, ammo, bandages, pink panties argh here we are the Vicious Vicuna Fur Snowsuit" said Admiral Bobbery as he was fishing through the belongings in the dresser.
"Well that other stuff would actually come in handy as well" said Waluigi.
"Argh you're right. Let's take it" said Admiral Bobbery.
"Well that was quite an interesting and fruitful three days" said Waluigi. Retainus smiled.
In the Wind Flower Field (which to Hal and Jeff's surprise also had patches of 1-UP Fields in it)
"Mmm, this actually isn't as bad as I thought it was going to be" said Jeff as he ate some balut.
"Told ya" said Hal. Then suddenly a boo appeared in front of them.
"Who are you?" asked Hal.
"The name's Bobby. I have come to help you rescue Kooper, and I've brung some friends to help us" said Bobby as he shook Hal's hand. Then three other boos appeared.
"Cornelius Milo" said the largest of the three.
"Crescent" said the second largest.
"Max" said the smallest.
"How on earth did you manage to find us?" asked Jeff.
"Honestly I don't even know, don't ask me how I managed to pull it off, just follow me" said Bobby. He led the group to a patch of grass which was secretly acting as a tarp to hide a portal.
"Well boys. Here we go" said Crescent. Bobby lifted up the tent and they jumped into the portal. It took them directly to Kamek's laboratory. Cornelius Milo then noticed many tiny bottles of red serum scattered around the desk with maps of the Islands of Magic laid out.
"Oh no" said Max. "He must have given him "the antidote""
"Well well well. Look who came back" laughed an oh-so familiar voice who then began to clap. They turned to see Kamek mocking them.
"You" growled Crescent. Hal made a beeline to subdue him but Kamek was putting up a good fight. Before Hal overpowered him, he pulled out a walkie talkie and alerted Bowser to their presence.
"BOWSER! THEY'RE BACK! HAL AND JEFF! AND FOUR BOOS ARE DOWN HERE AS WELL" Kamek shouted into the walkie talkie.
"WHAT! I'll send my best hand-plucked guards down there to stop them" said Bowser. They dashed into the hallway before being stopped by guards on both ends. Bobby then boblated and the guards were trapped inside orbs and blown away. They then made their way to the staircase but the stairs turned into a slide and they were trapped in the dungeons with Kooper.
"Ah, I see you've returned Jeff" chuckled Bowser. "All I must know is. Why? Why did you betray me?" said Bowser.
"Well, for starters, you tried to execute me for something that I didn't do" said Jeff.
"And then tortured Kooper" said Hal. "Also he didn't kill me. Wart pushed me into the pipe"
"I wasn't aware of your innocence" said Bowser. "Now, enough chit chat, time to die".
Bowser attempted to stomp them to death, but he then noticed that someone was missing.
"Hold on, there were six of you" said Bowser as he scratched his chin. "Where's the other one". A shadow appeared on the ceiling and then a big wet sloppy poo landed on Bowser's head and seeped into his eye's, obstructing his view.
"AH WHAT IS THIS! IS THIS SHIT! IT'S IN MY EYES!" screamed Bowser.
"Haha, get pooped on" said Bobby as he floated through the ceiling. He then found a switchboard and used Kamek's walkie talkie that he brung with them.
"Quick, put him over the trapdoor" said Bobby. Crescent and Max pulled Bowser over to the centre of the room and Bobby pulled a lever that opened a trapdoor which Bowser then fell into.
"Quick get Kooper and get onto the platform now" said Bobby. Hal ungagged and untied Kooper and pulled him over to the corner of the room where the other four were standing. Bobby pushed a button and the tiles that there were standing on then turned into a platform and lifted them up the throne room. However, there was an army of guards waiting for them.
"Nice try. Now time to die" laughed a guard. Then Bobby spotted something. It was an open window. He used his powers to levitate the other six through the window and out of the castle. They snuck past the windows to the koopalings' rooms and found a jet parked outside Larry's room. In their escape route was a balcony with Lemmy, Iggy and Larry having a morning tea and watching cartoons on Larry's tablet. They caught the koopalings' attention as they rushed past in the jet that they had stolen.
"What in King Dad's name was that?" said Iggy.
"Hey! THEY STOLE MY FIGHTER JET! NOOOOOOOOOO" bellowed a heartbroken Larry.
"So where do we go now?" asked Jeff.
"For now, I think that the station that I worked in with Cornelius Milo here, aka The Infinity Boo, in Turbulent City, would be a good hiding place from Bowser" said Bobby.
Well I really expanded on certain character arcs and storylines in this chapter and I also introduced some new characters like Donkey King Kong. I am about to write a Bobby backstory. Thanks for reading :)