Chapter 5: When He Talked With Cologne
Any feelings of doubt that Ranma had had about choosing to come into the Cat Cafe vanished the second that he was allowed to finally start digging into one of the bowls of noodles in front of him. Being in such close proximity to so much food all of a sudden really emphasized to Ranma just how famished he was. The wait had been well worth it though, as the noodles were just as tasty as Ranma had expected. He really indulged himself every time that he ate here. He may not have been crazy about his accidental engagement to Shampoo, even though he considered he to be the cutest of his three main fiances, but it couldn't be denied that the restaurant that she and Cologne had opened up produced extremely high quality food that always made him eager to come back for more.
Ranma quickly finished off his bowl in no time and sat back in delight. Although he had eaten quite a lot, it still felt as if it wasn't enough. He may not have been his usual size, but it was clear that his enormous appetite had remained unchanged. Wordlessly, Cologne placed the second of the three bowls in front of Ranma and gave him the okay to eat its contents as well. Ranma immediately gave his thanks and began to shove the noodles into his mouth as quickly as he could. Once he was finished, his stomach felt a bit more full, but he still felt as if he could fit even more in it. His eyes wandered to the third bowl, and then to Cologne who gave him a slight nod. Completely understanding the gesture, Ranma began to eat the contents of the bowl with an enormous smile on his face.
"Now I get it." he thought. "I saw the three bowls, but I originally just assumed that she wanted Shampoo to join in with all of us enjoying some dinner together. Even when it became clear that she was too busy to come upstairs, it still didn't click. But I guess that the Old Ghoul intended to give me all three bowls right from the start. She knows my eating habits so well and came fully prepared for them. If she wasn't always trying to convince me to marry Shampoo, she might not be so bad."
As Ranma ate his dinner, he answered each and every single one of Cologne's questions to give her a better picture of his circumstances and what had led to them. He spared no detail, going on and one about his fights with Ryoga which almost destroyed the Tendo Dojo, the multiple adversaries that had tried to hurt or hug him during his efforts to find the mushroom forest a few days ago, the multiple brushes with death from his battles again the once again fully grown Ryoga, and Kodachi's offer which almost led to him being kidnapped when he refused.
The entire time that Ranma spoke, Cologne sat in the seat opposite him and listened intently. She was extremely fascinated by the tale and wanted to absorb all that she could from it. She initially rested her head on top of her hands while leaning forward, but eventually switched to a more relaxed position leaning back in her seat by the time that Ranma was nearly finished telling his tale.
With one long, slurp of the last of the noodles in the third bowl, Ranma placed his hands on his stomach and leaned back in delight.
"Well, that's just about it." he said. "I'm stuffed. Thanks so much for the food. I really enjoyed it."
"Well thank you for telling me what you did." Cologne said. "You've been through quite a lot over the last few days. There are numerous means by which one's age can be reversed, either through magical artifacts or substances, though I never would've imagined that the Mushrooms of Time could possibly be involved."
"So, is there anything you can do? Do you know of some kind of alternative means of reversing the mushroom's effects or where to find them?" Ranma asked.
Cologne silently shook her head, which caused Ranma's face to fall in defeat.
"I'm sorry Son-in-Law, but no. There's nothing that I can do." Cologne answered. "While I am familiar with the Mushrooms of Time in theory, there is little to no information on their existence, and nothing that I know of mentions where to find them. The simple fact is that until you explained what happened to you, I had considered them to be nothing more than a myth. The fact that they're really out there somewhere completely boggles the mind. Leave it to the village idiot with no sense of direction to find them, walk away, and then destroy the remaining samples, even if all of it happened completely by accident."
"Okay, it's clear that I was mistaken in thinking that you could help me find a cure that way, but what you said just gave me another idea." Ranma said. "You mentioned that there are magical artifacts that you know of which reverse aging that you know exist for certain. Is the opposite true as well? Are there artifacts or substances which could age me up instead? I mean, that would also work as a potential cure, right?"
Cologne started laughing at this statement, much to Ranma's confusion.
"Hey, what's so funny?" he asked.
"I'm sorry." Cologne answered. "I just find it so humorous how that mind of yours works sometimes."
"And what's that supposed to mean?" Ranma asked with a hint of annoyance.
"Ranma, can you think of a single person other than someone in the same situation as you who would ever want to become older than they currently are?" Cologne asked.
Ranma's mouth dropped open in shock. He tried to form words, but nothing came out.
"Exactly." Cologne continued. "No self-respecting magical user would even dream of creating something to make them older. Magical abilities do increase with age, but that comes more from added years of training and experience. The only scenario that I can think of it being created for is a weapon, one that is deployed a single time against an enemy and then never used again. No one wants to be old Ranma, everyone out there would rather hold onto their youth for as long as they can. Now that I know that those mushrooms are out there somewhere, I'd certainly like to get my hands on them for my own usage. There's nothing wrong with me as I am right now, but when I was younger I was quite the spring chicken. I dare to say that I was even prettier than Shampoo if you can believe it. It would be such a dream to go back to being that way once again."
Ranma shifted in his seat slightly. He was very much aware of just how pretty Cologne had been when she was younger. His little journey with the Nanban Mirror had transported him back in time during a point when Cologne was tall, slender, and gorgeous; certainly nothing like the shriveled up old hag that she was in the present day. He chuckled a bit at the thought of that younger version of herself standing next to Shampoo.
"I can imagine." he said. "If that happened, I'd probably agree to marry you of all people if the opportunity arose for me to do so."
Collagen ended up blushing a bit at this. Despite her advanced age, she was still a woman with feelings just like everyone else. She had always considered Ranma to be a very attractive young man, and sometimes wondered what may have been if he had beaten her in combat instead of Shampoo.
"To be perfectly honest though, Son-in-Law, as great as the idea of being in my late teens or early twenties would be, I honestly think that I would give anything to be in the position that you find yourself in now." she said.
Ranma stared at Cologne with a bewildered expression.
"What? Why on Earth would you want to be six years old again?" he asked. "I've only been like this for a few days and it's been absolute hell for me at every turn. What could anyone possibly have to gain in this kind of form over being or close to being an adult."
Cologne closed her eyes for a few seconds before responding.
"Childhood, Son-in-Law, childhood." she answered.
"Huh?" Ranma asked.
"Ranma, in the months since that day when you and your father first barged into our village and shook up all of our lives, I've been keeping my eyes and ears very much open." she answered. "In my many efforts to get you to marry Shampoo, I made it a point to understand you at every level. You might not be very good when it comes to properly expressing your feelings, but I've been able to glean a lot from the little that I've been able to get from you?"
"And just how is it that you'd be able to do something like that anyway?" Ranma asked.
Cologne chuckled for a few seconds.
"When you end up living as long as I have, such skills become second nature." she answered. "But that's not important right now. What is important is that based on everything that I've observed and heard about your upbringing, it's clear that your father failed to provide you with a normal childhood."
"Tell me something I don't know." Ranma scoffed. "Pops and Mr. Tendo said the exact same thing when I left the house before. You don't have to be a psycho-a…whatchamacallit to figure out how screwed up my upbringing was. The fact that I mentally become a cat if I become too scared by them is proof enough of that."
"Well, your experiences are certainly an outlier to say the least, but it's not like you're the only one who didn't have a normal childhood." Cologne continued. "For every child in the world who grew up happy and loved, there are at least two or three more out there who wound up suffering instead much like you did."
"Yeah, yeah, there are scores of people out there who had even worse upbringings than me." Ranma said. "Is there some kind of point here?"
"I was just getting to that." Cologne answered. "The point is that there are lots of people who lacked normal childhoods and grew up to become complete whackos as a result. Childhood is a precious time which normally can never be given back if it is taken away. But try to imagine a scenario where someone who had a rough experience the first time was suddenly given a second chance to get it back much in the way that you did."
Ranma's mouth fell open, though he didn't say anything. He was starting to grasp what Cologne was trying to get at, but didn't want to interrupt her prematurely.
"Ah, I see that look on your face." Cologne continued. "I take it that you're starting to see the bigger picture here?"
"Maybe, but explain it to me just in case." Ranma answered.
Cologne sighed a bit before continuing.
"One of the amazing things about childhood is how long it seems to last." she explained. "I've lived for hundreds of years, and yet from my perspective all of those years may as well have gone by in the blink of an eye. It seems like only yesterday that I came of age, when I became a mother, and when I was eventually awarded the highest status that can be bestowed in our tribe. Let me ask you, even though you spent more than a decade traveling around the world training with your father, how long did it seem to last from your perspective by the time that you settled here in Nerima with the Tendos?"
Ranma leaned back in his chair and looked up in thought.
"That's difficult to say." he answered. "It's not like we had a calendar with us or nothing. Most of the time we were so focused on simply trying to survive to the next day that the passage of time didn't seem to mean anything to either of us. I never knew anything else other than what Pop was pounding into me, so I just went along with all of it without much of a second thought. It was absolute hell, and it never seemed to end. I may as well have been on the road for a hundred or even a thousand years, but as I said, we weren't really keeping track of stuff like that. We never even bothered to celebrate either of our birthdays at any point.
Cologne blinked a few times out of shock.
"Are you serious? You're telling me that you never once had a birthday party or celebration of any kind?" she asked.
"Pop never celebrated milestones if it didn't somehow relate to me finally learning a new technique that had required months or even years of practice for me to do so." Ranma answered. "And even then, the only way we celebrated it was by him not fighting me for my rice at dinnertime, that is if we even had rice to begin with."
Ranma let out a long sigh before continuing.
"There were many times when I never even knew how old I was because that stupid old man never even once thought to tell me when my birthday was. I remember once passing by a restaurant and seeing some kids' birthday party going on inside. I ran inside and asked the birthday boy why everyone looked so happy, and he explained to me that all kids are supposed to celebrate their birthdays with their friends and loved ones each year to commemorate growing older. I asked Pop why we had never done something like that, and he nonchalantly promised to do it the next time my birthday rolled around. That time came and went at least a dozen more times after that, but he never managed to fulfil that promise. I always had to ask him how old I was, and every time I got a new number I reminded him about his promise to me. He would usually make some excuse about having done something important on that date and once again promised to remember to do it next time. Eventually, I stopped asking because I knew that it was pointless. Pop was never going to keep his word, so there was no point in even trying to celebrate my birthday whatsoever."
Cologne leaned back in her chair out of shock.
"Wow, just wow." she said. "I knew that you had it rough, Son-in-Law, but that's quite a hard pill to swallow. Birthdays are meant to be a happy time, and that rings especially true for a child. Missing out something that special for your entire life; it's simply unfathomable."
"Nah, it's fine." Ranma said. "Like I said, I'm used to it by now. I don't expect Pop to ever keep his promise, and I don't feel any urge to celebrate my birthday anymore anyway."
As Ranma said that last sentence, his face fell slightly and he felt a small twinge of pain building up in his chest. He quickly clenched his right hand into a fist and pressed it against his chest before closing his eyes and taking a deep breath. Genma's words began to echo through his head.
"That's right, bury it all deep down. Such feelings make you weak."
Ranma opened his eyes and looked down at his hand. Despite going through his usual mantra, he couldn't help but feel a few tears attempting to leak out of his eyes.
"Damn this tiny body." he thought. "Just like with my girl form, being stuck like this for such a long time is causing my emotions to boil to the surface much more easily. I'm getting soft. I already said that I don't need or want to ever celebrate my birthday, so why do I keep feeling this way whenever I think about it?"
Ranma shook his head and slapped his cheeks a few times to calm himself down. Cologne didn't say anything, simply watching the strange scene unfold until Ranma started to recenter himself.
"Okay, so you really missed out." she said. "But surely things have changed for you by now. Haven't the Tendos tried to throw you a birthday party since you arrived?"
"Um…they haven't really had a chance to do so." Ranma answered. "I know that Pop and I have been here for quite a while, but in all that time my birthday hasn't yet rolled around."
Cologne's eyes burst open for a few seconds before narrowing. Her wrinkled lips quickly formed into a mischievous smile.
"Oh, is that right?" she asked. "And just when is it scheduled to arrive then?"
Ranma began to feel a bit nervous seeing Cologne's expression.
"Why…does that matter?" Ranma asked.
"Because this little tidbit of information opens up so many possibilities." Cologne chucked. "You've experienced things on your journey that most people wouldn't get to see for themselves if they lived for five lifetimes, and yet a simple birthday celebration is not one of them. Oh, I can already picture it now. Shampoo and I would hold it right here at the cafe. Everyone who's everyone would be invited, we wouldn't care in the slightest as long as we're the ones hosting it. We'd have everyone give out enough presents to make up for all of those years that you missed out on, and all the tasty food that you can eat."
Ranma's mouth started to water at the thought of such a meal, though he quickly wiped it away.
"And who knows, maybe it will wind up being more than a simple birthday celebration." Cologne continued.
Cologne stared off into space as the image of this scenario flashed through her mind.
Ranma and Shampoo were holding hands in the middle of the Cat Cafe. Ranma's birthday party had been a roaring success and most of the guests had already left. Ranma himself had recently finished off a massive meal that Shampoo had cooked especially for Ranma. The two stared into each other's eyes with bright smiles.
"Shampoo, thank you so much." Ranma said. "Everything today was perfect."
"Ah yah." Shampoo said. "Shampoo always so happy to make Ranma so happy."
"Shampoo, today was the best day of my life." Ranma continued. "I've never celebrated my birthday before now, but I can't ever remember being this happy."
Ranma reached into his pocket and took out a small box.
"Shampoo, until now, I was always on the fence about what I truly wanted out of life." he said. "But now, I know which path it is that I want to go down. How would you feel about making me this happy every day for the rest of our lives?"
Ranma opened the box, revealing a small ring inside. Shampoo's face turned bright red and she placed her hands on her head in shock.
"Ranma…you mean…?" she asked.
Ranma nodded.
"Shampoo, let's get married as we were always meant to. What do you say?" he asked.
Shampoo smiled brightly and leapt into Ranma's arms.
"Yes. Shampoo say yes." she answered.
All of a sudden, a series of doves surrounded the two. When they cleared, Ranma was dressed in a black tuxedo, while Shampoo was wearing a beautiful white wedding dress. Bells chimed and the sounds of a piano playing 'Wedding March' could be heard in the background. The two stared into each other's eyes and kissed. Several images suddenly flew by depicting Ranma and Shampoo leaving in a limo, flying to China for their honeymoon, and then raising multiple children in Joketsuzoku. All the while, the music continued to play and Cologne smiled brightly.
The fantasy suddenly came to an end when Ranma angrily popped the thought bubble that Cologne had conjured with his finger. Cologne blinked a few times in confusion as a fierce aura began to surround Ranma.
"Are you kidding me right now?" he asked. "First Pop and Mr. Tendo, and now you too. Geez, are my engagements all that you people ever think about?"
"Well…considering that my great-granddaughter and I moved across the world for that very thing, I would say yes." Cologne answered.
Cologne chuckled a bit at the end of that sentence, but this only caused Ranma's anger to rise further.
"Look, even if I was in the mood to have someone celebrate my birthday, which I'm not, may I point out a serious flaw in your little fantasy?"
"You may." Cologne answered.
"In case you completely forgot, I'm currently six years old." Ranma continued. "Are you really going to expect me to marry someone ten years older than me while I'm a child? I mean sure, Shampoo is pretty cute and all, but the very idea of a child being married to someone that much older than him is just too weird."
Cologne could've interjected something here, but she chose to remain silent for the time being. Much of what Ranma was saying made perfect sense, and she wanted to see where he was going with this.
"You know, I knew that suddenly turning into a child would be problematic, but I never expected that it would inconvenience me this much." Ranma continued. "As soon as I woke up, Pop and Mr. Tendo brought up my engagement with Akane just like you're doing now."
"Oh, and what did they say about it?" Cologne asked.
"They said that they had decided to place it on hold for the time being." Ranma answered.
Cologne's eyes shot open again, she used her sleeves to cover the large smile that was forming across her face.
"Akane and I were actually relieved about it at first, until they revealed that they still expect us to marry as soon as I change back. Whether that happens today or ten years from now, they're still holding out hopes for their stupid dojos to be joined. All that those two care about is themselves. I'm now stuck like this, and yet they all expect things to just continue on like nothing happened all to eventually fulfil their selfish desires. Who do they think they are anyway?"
"You know something, Son-in-Law? You're absolutely right." Cologne answered. "The idea of a young child being married at your age is truly unthinkable. If two children become engaged as children and then married when they come of age, it's a different story. As you are right now, it would be truly foolish of me to expect you to marry Shampoo. After all, our tribe may be primitive, but we certainly aren't barbarians. Our laws are in place for a good reason, and while they may seem extreme at times even we have our limits as to what's considered acceptable. Therefore, I Cologne, elder and matriarch of Joketsuzoku, hereby declare the kiss of marriage inflicted on Ranma Saotome temporarily nullified until you come of age once again."
Ranma nearly fell backwards upon hearing this. He blinked a few times in confusion while trying to make sense of what had just happened.
"Wait, are you serious right now?" he asked.
"Completely." Cologne answered. "Ranma, neither one of us know when it is that you'll be able to change back. It could be tomorrow, or it could be ten years from now, but in any case it's of no consequence to me. I'm in the prime of my life right now, and considering how long I've lived already, ten more years of having to wait to see Shampoo marry you is practically no time at all. Shampoo may pout at the idea at first, but I'll make her come around. If there's one thing that she knows how to do, it's how to respect any rules laid down regarding engagements."
"Oh yeah?" Ranma asked. "Well how do you know that I'll even want to marry her once that time eventually rolls around?"
Cologne gripped her staff tightly.
"The fact is that you will be engaged to her once again as soon as that time comes." she answered. "You may not feel that way right now, but a lot can happen between now and then that might change your mind."
"Yeah right." Ranma scoffed.
"I'm serious." Cologne said. "Ranma, you asked me before what my point was in mentioning the possibility of someone getting a second chance at childhood after having a rough go-around the first time. The point that I was trying to make is that having a second go-around can allow that person to experience everything that they missed out on the first time."
Ranma's anger immediately faded away as everything that Cologne was saying began to sink in.
"You said before that you missed out on everything that a kid would need to have a normal childhood." Cologne continued. "Including but not limited to, loving parents, genuine friendships, schooling, and so many other things. I know you may hate your reduced age, but try to consider it more of a blessing in disguise. Just think about it. How many people would like to be in your place and have the possibility to get a new lease of life; to correct some of the errors they had made in their lives and maybe find happiness? You're a child again without most of the responsibilities your teenage self has to deal with. Maybe you could leave your father for some better parental figures or even stay with your mother. An adult's life may pass in the blink of an eye, but a child's life from their perspective can seem to last for an eternity by comparison. With that in mind, you'll have all the time in the world to choose which new paths to travel down, and the possibilities leading to a better life are practically endless. Doesn't that sound like a good deal?"
Ranma waited for a few seconds before responding.
"Well, when you put it that way, it does." he answered. "There does seem to be several benefits that can come out from me having a new childhood. Maybe I didn't take that into consideration before because it was Pops trying to persuade me."
"That's perfectly understandable." Cologne said. "Given everything that your father has ever done to you, it's only natural that you would be heavily reluctant to listen to anything he says. I know, why don't you ditch your father and simply accompany us back to China?"
"I'm sorry…what?" Ranma asked.
"You've been given an opportunity for a fresh start without all of the chaos that seems to follow you everywhere." Cologne answered. "Since Nerima is such a hotspot for all of the misery that you've had to suffer through, perhaps the solution is to get as far away from it as you possibly can. I mean sure, Shampoo and I have enjoyed our time here, but we never meant to permanently call it our home. That place is back in China, and we always intended to return there regardless of whether or not you and Shampoo tied the knot. The Amazons would gladly adopt you into the tribe if you joined us, and you would fit right in given your skills in martial arts. Our tribe has remained strong specifically because of the fact that our members marry outsiders and bring them into the fold. Plus, given how our tribe regularly engages in the trade and sale of magical artifacts from all across the world, it stands to reason that we may find something that can turn you back to normal fairly quickly. At the very least, you'll finally be able to get rid of your curse given our village's close proximity to Jusenkyo."
Ranma opened his mouth to respond, but Cologne raised her hand to indicate that she had more to say.
"Now please note that I am not going to force you to do anything." she continued. "All I ask is that you think about my offer. Shampoo and I are willing to let things play out for the time being, and the door will always be open should anything happen to change your mind. In the meantime, I promise that I won't allow any harm to come to you while you're in this state. You have my word on this, provided that you remain open to my proposal."
Ranma didn't say anything for several seconds. He was surprised over just how civil Cologne was being. Like Kodachi, she wanted Ranma to live with and be raised by her, and be granted a whole new life in the process which could dramatically reshape his future. Unlike Kodachi though, she didn't appear to have any interest in getting what she wanted by force. She simply wanted him to remain open to the concept and was otherwise willing to let bygones be bygones. She was even willing to temporarily suspend the engagement as a peace offering of sorts. Ranma wasn't buying it though. Even if he wouldn't necessarily be chained up the way that he would've been with Kodachi's offer, he would still be at the whim of whatever the Chinese Amazon tribe expected him to be. Thinking about it carefully, it was clear that his personal freedom was what truly mattered to him more than ever right now. Even if he didn't necessarily agree with the terms of this proposal, the pros of staying open to it far outweighed the cons. At the very least, it would mean fewer people trying to kill or marry him on a daily basis, and that was always a positive in his eyes. His path forward was clear.
Ranma closed his eyes and took a deep breath.
"Okay, I'll consider it." he said. "The fact that I won't have Shampoo flinging herself at me anymore is enough to leave me open to it at the very least. What about Mousse though?"
"What about him?" Cologne asked.
"Shortly after all of this nonsense with the mushrooms started, Mousse attacked both Ryoga and I right out of the blue. He didn't even know who we were since he wasn't wearing his glasses, and still he beat us up pretty badly with absolutely no provocation from either of us. Given what Ryoga was able to do to me, I'm sure that you can understand my nervousness at the thought of being ambushed by a mentally unhinged, nearsighted man who carries all sorts of weapons in his sleeves and always picks a fight with me at any chance he gets. Unless I have your guarantee that he won't do that anymore, the deal is off."
Cologne narrowed her eyes for a few seconds before taking a deep breath.
"You certainly know how to drive a hard bargain, Son-in-Law." she said. "As you know, Mousse is truly an idiot who brings nothing but disgrace and dishonor to our tribe with his antics. Trying to get through to him though is like talking to a brick wall. Nonetheless, I will do everything in my power to ensure that he learns his place and doesn't attack you again until you return to normal. I honestly had no idea that he just beat up two random children that he happened to encounter on the street. I will make sure that he gets what he deserves for that as soon as you leave."
Ranma began to smile at this.
"Maybe the Old Ghoul isn't so bad after all." he thought.
"Okay, thanks for that. I mean it." he said. "It's getting late, so I should probably be on my way then. Thanks for the food."
Ranma hopped onto the ground from his chair and began to head for the stairs. Just before he could reach the door, he heard Cologne's voice calling out to him once again.
"Hold on a minute, Ranma." she said. "Tell me, do you have any ideas as to what you plan on doing next now that you know that you'll be stuck like this for the time being?"
"Honestly…no." Ranma shrugged. "I don't usually plan that far ahead. When I was on the road with Pop, our biggest concern was usually where we would obtain our next meal or a place to sleep for the night. For now, all I can say is that I'm going to keep searching for a way to return to normal. I don't know how I may find one, but I'm sure that I'll think of something. Heck, I usually have my best ideas while taking a walk, so maybe something will come to me on the way back to the dojo. You never know."
Cologne chuckled at this.
"Just like you, Son-in-Law." he said. "Always so focused on getting yourself out of a tough situation however you can. Don't worry about going at it alone though. I may not know of a way to reverse the effects of the mushrooms myself, but I will continue to look for one with all of the resources that I have at my never know, something miraculous may pop up when we least expect it. In any case, I'll be sure to keep you informed of any developments."
"Thanks, I appreciate it." Ranma said.
"You're very welcome." Cologne said. "Now why don't I escort you out. The last thing we need is that idiot Mousse coming after you again."
"Yeah." Ranma said.
Ranma and Cologne chuckled as she hopped down the stairs on her staff and led Ranma back through the main restaurant area. Because it was much later, the crowd had thinned out even if the place was still pretty busy. Fortunately, it seemed as if Mousse was still out on one of his deliveries and Shampoo was busy picking up orders from the kitchen. Because of this, Ranma and Cologne made it outside without any disturbances or difficulties getting in their way. Cologne opened the door for Ranma and waved him off as he began to make his way down the street.
"See you soon, Ranma." she said. "Be safe. Also, good luck with finding a cure. We'll be waiting eagerly."
"I'm sure." Ranma called out as he waved back.
Ranma turned around and immediately began to smirk.
"But don't get your hopes up too high." he muttered to himself. "Once I get back to normal, the last thing that I'll ever do is marry Shampoo. If the sky is truly the limit thanks to my newfound situation, then I'm going to forge my own path no matter what."
Just as Ranma turned a corner and disappeared from view, Shampoo suddenly appeared in the doorway.
"Did Shampoo just hear Ranma?" she asked. "Great-grandmother, why you let him leave without Shampoo getting to say goodbye to him?"
"A lot was said during our meeting, Shampoo." Cologne answered. "And a few key things were decided upon which you should probably hear about right away?"
Shampoo looked at Cologne with a confused expression.
"What you mean by that?" she asked.
Cologne spent the next few minutes explaining everything that she and Ranma had discussed. By the time that she finished, Shampoo's mouth had fallen open in shock.
"What?" she asked. "You expect Shampoo keep paws off Ranma for ten years? Shampoo refuse. Airen must experience all of Shampoo's love for him to want to marry."
"I understand your frustrations, Shampoo, but unfortunately it can't be helped right now." Cologne said. "No one would ever look on you favorably if you were to suddenly marry a small child, no matter how long he's actually been alive for. Plus, he refused to remain open to my offer to take him back with us to China unless I promised to ensure that both you and Mousse keep your hands off him for the foreseeable future. And yes, that includes both hugging and that surprise attack that you always do with your bike. Although, given how you nearly suffocated him earlier, it should've been pretty obvious that the former needed to be kept in check for sure."
Shampoo hmphed and turned away.
"Shampoo so upset right now." she said. "Great-grandmother make decisions without asking Shampoo how she feels about them."
Cologne quickly slammed her staff onto the ground, causing Shampoo to jump a bit out of surprise.
"Calm down." Cologne said. "I know that it may be frustrating, but rules are rules. Besides, not all hope is lost."
Shampoo began to smile.
"Oh, so Great-grandmother have plan then?" she asked.
"I do indeed." Cologne said.
All of a sudden, a bell could be heard dinging twice from inside the cafe.
"Two orders to tables #5 and #8." a male voice called out.
"But first, go and take care of those orders." Collagen said. "We don't want our customers getting frustrated after all. I'll tell you everything once we lock up for the night."
"On it." Shampoo said with a nod.
Shampoo turned around and ran back into the cafe to grab the orders. As she did, Cologne closed the door and began to smile devilishly.
"That Son-in-Law thinks that he's so smart by making me agree to those terms." she thought. "I can make it so Shampoo won't make any moves on him for the time being, but there are many other things that she can do to try and win his heart. The worst case scenario is that we have to wait ten years, but I know for a fact that it won't be that long. Ranma rarely puts effort or thought into anything that doesn't involve martial arts, but when he does he always manages to find a way to succeed at his ambitions. Right now, given that all he wants to do is find a way to cure his condition, I know for certain that he will eventually succeed in finding a means to do so."
Cologne glanced at Shampoo who used some of her martial arts skills to deliver the bowls to both tables simultaneously. The people sitting at each table applauded at her efforts and she bowed towards all of them.
"Regardless of how long it takes, as I said to him before, a lot can happen in all of that time. Just you wait, Ranma. By the time that my plan is complete, you'll be begging to come along with us to China so you can marry Shampoo. I just know it."
All of a sudden, the back door flung open and Mousse stepped through. He began to smile upon seeing Shampoo and started to run towards her.
"Oh my darling Shampoo, how I've missed you so much." he cried out.
Before he could get too far, Cologne leapt towards Mousse and pulled him down by the ear. He cried out in pain as her feet landed on the floor.
"Not so fast there Mr. Part-time." she said. "Come with me right now, there are some things that I need to try and get through that thick skull of yours."
Mousse continued to cry out as Cologne pulled him back towards the kitchen and up the stairs. The door slammed shut behind them, with the sound echoing throughout the entire restaurant.
End of Chapter 5
3/28/2025
Special thanks to my biggest supporters: Homura VanRoyen, sudowiki
Hi Everyone. After a two month hiatus, here is the fifth chapter of the story. Sorry for the long unexpected delay, but a lot has happened in my life. I mainly realized that I was unable to focus on two stories at once and decided to pivot back to The Oyama Project. Then I had to put that story on hiatus as well due to some issues with my career getting in the way of me writing. I ultimately decided to come back to this though as I have missed working on it and needed a way to clear my head after several recent hardships.
The reason that this chapter took so long to write was due to the nature of what was included within. I pride myself on dialogue and banter between characters, but I find it hard to write for Ranma characters sometimes due to their style of speaking clashing with my preference for their sentences being grammatically correct. I also found myself going off on multiple tangents at points, with certain questions being asked that wouldn't be answered until several additional pages had passed due to the conversation changing topic frequently. I am happy with how it turned out though, as I find that prolonged conversations in real life go very much the same way.
I previously said that Ranma would leave Nerima in this chapter, though I decided to push it to the next chapter since his conversation with Cologne turned out much longer than I expected. It will work out better this way anyway, as the multifaced nature of Chapter 6 will finally introduce the basic crossover elements and setting before diving into it full force in Chapter 7. I hope to get it out soon, so stay tuned.
Please be sure to like and comment on this chapter as any feedback you give me is extremely helpful to me as an aspiring writer.
If you enjoy what you've seen so far and you're interested in seeing more, consider checking out my other stories.
I'd like to thank you all for your encouraging likes, follows, and comments, and stay tuned for Chapter 6, coming soon.