While it could not be truthfully said that every day of working in the employ of the Governor of Axel was peculiar, interesting, or even notable, an unexciting day was an event in and of itself. The Governor was such a busy person that there was almost always something interesting happening, when his staff was called upon.
Today was not merely a notable day, nor even an interesting day. No, today was clearly going to be a peculiar day. After all, it wasn't every day you walked into your Lord's house and got told to strip for security purposes.
"Sir, are you quite sure?" asked Faven Toleme following the strip search. According to others who'd now left the Governor's employ, Toleme had been in the employ of the Barnes Alexei family since before Alderp had been born. Risa didn't know when that was supposed to be, but he had the experience of decades on his side.
"Against this enemy," Tanya von Degurechaff said, "there is no length too great. You'll both be well compensated, if you accept the work, as this falls under the 'exceptional circumstances' section of your work contracts. If not, then would you mind-"
"I live to serve, sir. Exceptional or not, these are the wishes of you and the Lord Alexei. I shall not fail to rise to the occasion."
Risa smothered the glare she'd sent the elderly gentleman. Once, she'd been confused by the constant negging of the old coot who'd once run the household of Alderp Barnes Alexei and now served Walter Barnes Alexei and the man who'd been tasked with his former Lord's execution.
No longer. "Of course I'll accept the work, sir!" she replied, chipper.
Risa had been hired the week before Alderp had departed for the capital. She'd been nauseous the entire time he was gone, after the housekeeper Shelly had explained, in quiet, apologetic tones, why he'd given Risa such a good contract, and the only part of her employment with his killer she'd been worried about was the decrease in pay.
Most of the old staff was gone at this point, which had improved her finances and reduced her lingering worry. She might have thought it was the change in venue that was the cause, but the real problem was the unique experience of working for him.
Tanya von Degurechaff, clad in all of her adventuring gear and an intense scowl, nodded once and then looked back down at his food. It was one of those instant-meals that the Mithril Foundation made, and she almost giggled at how disgruntled Faven seemed to be that he was eating that instead of something less pedestrian, like literally anything else.
Risa had learned weeks ago that as long as she stuck around, her pay would go up and she'd also get to keep watching interesting things happen. Those who couldn't stomach the volatility, which included turning portions of the mansion into workspaces and the random detonation of their former workplace and the flying around and the constant battling and more, had left, although a few of those servants now exclusively served Walter.
She and Faven watched on as the Lord, his Lady, and their retainer ate breakfast, discussing the day. They were two of the only servants still employed by the Barnes Alexei family that were always willing to serve Tanya directly, though Shelly had complained about not getting enough-
"Sir," Faven said as a lull in the conversation emerged, "while your desire to be prepared is understandable, are you not concerned that those you meet with today may take offense…?" The question contained tones of opposing firmness and tentativeness.
She and Faven had both had to work together to convince their Lord and Lady that having the pair of them act as intermediaries was untenable. Even if they often quarreled, in ways both obvious and subtle, they were both committed to the success of their Lord.
Tanya looked up from his food. "Whatever offense they would take is immaterial compared to the preservation of lives," he responded, his prompt response suggesting he'd expected the quest. "It won't be a problem," he claimed. Through a supreme exertion of will, Risa kept her mouth closed as what he was wearing changed. One moment, he was armed to the teeth, and in the next, he was wearing more professional, respectable attire. She could only blink in shock at the sudden inexplicable change.
She blinked again, and his compatriots also no longer seemed to be dressed in their battle attire. Their retainer ran a hand down their front, her hand passing through the cloth. She merely raised an eyebrow, which Risa thought was a bit of an underreaction.
"Ah," Faven managed to say, "Very good, sir and madam." He wanted to ask more, and so did Risa, but before that…
"Sir," Risa said, taking a step forward, "should Faven not go to the market to see if there is any Manatite, to replace what you're using for that spell? You mentioned needing to get some last night."
After a moment of thought, he nodded. "Yes, thank you for the reminder. Faven?"
Risa turned to look at him, and she could read, in the beady look in his orange eyes, that he was not happy to have been volunteered. "Of course," the man replied, bowing at the waist. She resisted the urge to smirk at his retreating back – another victory for her!
It was nothing less than what the blue-haired dandy deserved. She turned back to her Lord, Lady, and retainer. "Now, I believe we need to get ready for the first meeting with the… Marriage Association?" she said, confused. What was that about?
She looked back from the wall with the whiteboard to find Tanya sighing, deeply unhappy. "Perhaps I'll let the illusion fall so they know I don't like them…" he mused aloud to himself. Lady Serebryakov protested, while their retainer nitpicked her new clothing.
Thus, the conversation began again, and Risa learned.
As they spoke, a cackle rang in her mind – so it was an illusion! Could she somehow hold the information over Faven?
He was so stuck up, but she'd stuck it out and proven him wrong. Was it wrong to want a bit of revenge?
-OxOxO-
The Association to Protect Women's Chances of Marriage was not something Tanya cared about.
Whatever discussions one wanted to have about the growth of a country and demography and societal cohesion, none of it mattered to Tanya, because he was only going to be Governor of Axel for as long as it took to defeat the Demon King. Discussions like that, which involved the long-term development of an area, was not relevant to Tanya. Moreover, he knew one of the reasons behind this so-called 'mystery of Axel' was the Succubi. Even if they weren't working for him directly anymore, he wasn't blowing their cover anytime soon, especially not for the sake of an organization he didn't care about.
Despite how little he wanted to be involved with them, they wanted to be involved with him very badly. He'd tried to find a way to have Walter take care of them, assuming he actually got a chance to leave Axel and wasn't either fighting her or recovering from the inevitable wounds, regardless of the fact that Walter didn't have any idea what the Marriage Association was. However, as much as it rankled him to admit, Tanya had been… outmaneuvered.
He'd refused outright when Sena had attempted to get him to commit to a meeting last week. She'd tried twice more before he'd thrown the book at her, content that she'd never get a meeting before he left.
He had been wrong. She'd garnered the support of the members of the Association to Protect Women's Chances of Marriage, gotten them to sign a petition, and filled out all the forms correctly, in days. He'd only been able to put it off for a whole week due to prior obligations.
On the one hand, it was a heartening sign of how much the town had improved since Alderp had been in charge. You wouldn't have gotten a meeting with him within a week without bribery or knowing friends in high places. The effort of Tanya and everyone else really was showing.
On the other hand, Tanya didn't want to talk with them and couldn't really feel that happy about it. No, Tanya wanted to be more upset, because he had other things he'd rather be doing…
However, if a measurable percentage of Axel's population had signed the petition, then he couldn't really just ignore the problem.
There was a knock on the door of the meeting room. Tanya didn't bother calling for them to come in – the servants Walter had loaned him knew their job well.
The door opened, and Toleme walked through, gesturing towards the opposite end of the table. Behind him were two cloaked figures, with Risa bringing up the rear. He nodded to them both. "Thanks for showing them in. Would you like something to drink?" Visha asked.
Both cloaked figures shook their heads, while the one who seemed to be in the lead shifted to stare at the servants. "Alright," Tanya said, trying his best not to let his exasperation with the situation show, "you two can leave, for the moment. Perhaps prepare some refreshments for after the meeting." Tanya sipped her coffee as the pair left them.
Visha followed them out to get back to work on the paperwork for the testing they hoped to do before the next Monster Rush.
The cloaked figures uncloaked, and the pair of women let out a sigh of relief. "Why all the secrecy?" asked Aloerina Vola Essex, head of the city's guard. The pair began walking down the side of the large meeting room's table.
"You never know when an enemy is watching," Tanya replied as he stood up, his answer vague. In actuality, he didn't want to be overly associated with their movement, and he had another meeting after this one. If they were recognized, that meeting might get compromised.
Sena Jemail was the police's chief prosecutor. She extended a hand, and Tanya reciprocate-
Only to complete the action quickly and then decouple, because he'd momentarily forgotten his hands appeared naked but were actually gloved, beneath his illusion. "So," he said, moving into their discussion quickly,"you two are here to meet me as representatives of the Association, then?"
He sat down behind the much smaller desk at the end of the room, behind which was a fireplace as well as some unimportant yet useful books lining the wall and giving off an air of scholarly work. Off to one side of the desk was a clear case made of crystal, inside which was a truth-telling bell. It wouldn't be useful for this meeting.
They nodded, nearly in unison. "As its President," Aloerina said, gesturing to Sena, "and its chief officer," she gestured to herself, "we think it proper we meet with you, the governor of Axel."
"Yes," Sena continued. "Speaking of proper." She took a book out of the small purse at her side and placed it on the table. Tanya's eyes widened fractionally.
"What is this?" Sena asked, an unspoken accusation ringing. It was one of the pornographic manga he'd translated weeks ago.
"Porn," he replied. They gasped at the word. Tanya raised an eyebrow in response. "Miss Jemail. I fail to see how that is relevant to the meeting we're supposed to have. I was under the impression the Association wanted support for an," he paused to take a brief look at the papers on his side of the table, "'investigation of utmost importance?'"
"How can you attach your name to something like this?!" one asked. "If the Association is ever to achieve its goals, then material like this has to go!"
"Distributing material like this is legal," Tanya replied. He'd ensured that even material like this was covered when he'd become governor, and he got some residuals each week for his help in finding and translating them on behalf of those who were selling them.
"They're marked with a label that describes what age it is appropriate for," with the upper limit being fourteen in this world because that was when you could get married, "and, as long as the bookstore you got this from was doing its job, then it was kept separate from the rest of their products. Were they not?"
"Well," Aloerina said, "no, it was kept separate. But that doesn't matter! It's immoral-"
"The law," Tanya said, taking another sip of coffee, "does not dictate what is or isn't moral, just what is legal." He looked at Sena. "I hope you're not advocating for the restriction of the freedom of speech, chief prosecutor?"
"No," she replied immediately, "but there are limits to how far that freedom can be taken when it can lead to harm. It should be banned."
"What harm?" Tanya asked. "Do you honestly think not having access to such material would stop people from…" he cleared his throat. "Well. We've clearly strayed from the topic at hand-"
"The Association," Aloerina said, resolute, "is worried that material like this is contributing to the difficulty women have with getting married."
Tanya snorted. "And none of them have found anything they like for sale?"
Both of them stared blankly. Tanya elaborated. "Have they actually tried to find anything they might like for sale? Have either of you looked for something that would catch your fancy?" He wasn't going to speculate about anyone's desires, but he doubted they'd be calling for the abolishment of that service if they used it.
Based on their expressions of shock, with Aloerina's being tinged with disgust, the answer was no. Fast as a flash, he thought of an example. "How would they like it if no dress could be sold that went below the knees because all the men in town thought women shouldn't dress so modestly?" he asked.
Both were affronted, even though neither of them were wearing a dress that long – their clothes were casual, though Sena's skirt was probably pushing it with how short it was. "That would be-"
"Ridiculous?" Tanya cut in. "Yes, it would."
"And you're just… okay with your name being attached to such things?" Sena asked, incredulous and concerned.
Tanya shrugged. "I didn't just translate that kind of book, you know. If anyone asked me why I translated any one book, I'd tell them the truth: I got paid for my work. I didn't care what I was translating, as long as I got paid, and I wouldn't care if I got paid to translate more."
Well, he might object if he personally disagreed with the material. If he found a copy of the bible, he would, in all likelihood, burn it, but that had less than the idea of other people reading it and becoming deluded and more to do with denying Being X followers with which he might attack her.
Both were quiet. Aloerina seemed to be working through the problem in her head, while Sena's look was… contemplative.
He squinted. Was that a blush?
Sena spoke. "We can revisit that question at a later date," she said. Tanya wasn't going to budge, not if it was just the Association trying to get it banned. A measurable percentage of Axel's population might have called themselves members and signed the petition, yes, but they were not a large percentage.
"The real problem," Aloerina said, "is with prostitution. We can't think of any other reason why dozens of women would be unable to get a husband, no matter how hard they tried."
His gut reaction to that statement was that they were uncreative to a remarkable degree. "Continue," Tanya said, keeping his thoughts to himself for the moment.
They expounded. "The city's records state that the last legal brothels and strip clubs were closed down over a decade ago. The Eris Church's records Sena saw indicated the same thing, though getting the copies we requested has taken longer due to… current events."
Sena picked up the thread, her expression pained. "What we've deduced is that the place must be operating outside of the law for a reason. Given the late Alderp Barnes Alexei's proclivities," she said, her respect for his station in the aristocracy coloring her voice despite his crimes, "our assumption is that he set up the place as a way to cater to him and clientele of his choosing, as well as a way for him to solicit both victims and the mystical, demonic power he had to influence people's minds."
"With his execution, the organization has likely been feeling the pinch recently. Perhaps the incursion of the Yatagarasu was an attempt to make contact and absorb whatever remains of Alderp's illegal resources?" Sena positied. "Regardless, we want to conduct a thorough search for such an organization."
Tanya nodded along the entire time, and he found himself surprised.
"And your proof for any of it?" he asked. They faltered, and Tanya let out a sigh.
Yes, he was surprised with what they'd said. He was surprised at how elaborate they'd managed to make their story without any proof.
"We-" Aloerina stuttered. "We know that the legal ones went out of business a decade and a half ago after several years of falling revenue. No one has even attempted to set one up in the interim-"
"Which is proof only of their closure. If he'd set something like that up, his staff would have known, even if they only found out accidentally, or it would have been in his records. While they were destroyed, I can confidently say if they existed, I would have found out."
"Then," Sena said, her expression even more pained, "perhaps another noble did it? His brother-"
"All you have," Tanya said, "is conjecture."
"Well," Aloerina said, "no one will tell us! It's clear something is going on. Why else wouldn't people want to marry?"
Tanya raised an eyebrow. "The economy?" he asked. He'd meant it to be rhetorical, but they just stared at him, uncomprehending.
He continued. "I think," he said, "that you two have made a few mistakes. Beyond what we've already discussed, your assumption seems to be that there could only possibly be one reason, and as soon as you take care of that problem, you'll get what you want."
He had his suspicions about the validity of the petition, but they'd gotten the signatures. He wasn't about to point out the possible disconnect between them and those people directly. That wouldn't serve his interests very well.
"Off the top of my head, the amount of room for a family in an urban environment, the uncertainty of the state of Axel in the future, the broad cultural norms and expectations of Axel and Belzerg, as well as their change over time, and the social expectations surrounding marriage are all likely to impact someone's decision to pursue a relationship with the expectation of marriage."
He could think of more, of course. Personality was also a factor – he vaguely recalled that Sena's husband had divorced her for some reason. The real problem, in Tanya's case, was that they were partially correct, because the Succubi did exist, which meant that the portion of the town's male population that wanted a relationship just for the sex didn't need a relationship to feel just as good. A lower supply of available men meant a higher demand for what was left and an increase in price; or, those unaware of the Succubi or who wanted a relationship regardless of the Succubi's presence could afford to be choosy.
She wasn't outing them anytime soon – they could always retaliate by revealing just how involved Tanya had gotten with them, but more than that, she just wouldn't gain that much by doing so. Instead, she had to downplay their existence and subsequent effect and play up the other possible causes, because an Association with a couple hundred members of variable commitment but a common anxiety did not spring up overnight with how long the Succubi had been here.
"You wanted help with an investigation?" he confirmed rhetorically. "I presume you wanted to look into the supposed underground brothel, but I suggest you shift focus. Instead of searching for some place whose existence you can't verify, let alone their location, start by asking people, both in and outside of your organization, why they haven't been marrying."
The best part of that kind of questioning was that no one who was going to the Succubi for dreams would actually reveal that fact because they were Demons; they'd do polling that supported Tanya's argument and nothing about a supposed strip club.
"You might not get answers you were expecting," he cautioned, "but that doesn't mean you should dismiss an answer you don't like without cause – if the reasons people are giving you diverge from the reasons for which you started the Association, trying to ignore reality will only lead to mismanagement, inefficiency, and leave the root problems unsolved."
Based on their studious, earnest faces, they really did seem like they wanted to help people, and not just for their own self-interest.
He finished up his thoughts. "Now, I obviously can't force you not to investigate things how you see fit. You're not doing this as part of the government," which meant they couldn't compel people to answer questions they didn't want to, giving people who were going to the Succubi an out. "However, if you were willing to follow my advice, give me some progress updates, help me in getting the word out about some of Axel's other projects if necessary, and perhaps investigate the other mysteries of Axel, I might be able to allocate some funding to contract the Association for this work."
Their eyes grew wide. That was more than they'd been expecting to get today, then. All the better to make them think she was firmly on their side so she could undermine them.
They conversed, quiet and quick, and then turned back to him. "We'd need to speak with the rest of the Association, but we're certainly not opposed to the idea!" Sena replied.
Tanya smiled, nodded, and stood. "Excellent. Ah, and if, in your investigations, you did actually find evidence for the illusory strip club, clue me in?" They rose as well, cloaks in hand. "I'd like to help coordinate with my own resources."
They nodded, and he led them out, past Lorelei and Visha, towards the stairs. "Now, I actually was wondering if I could have your help for an unrelated matter, in your official governmental capacities?" the words flipped a switch behind their genial smiles. "It has to do with my next meeting. But, before that, how about you have those refreshments? I'll join you as soon as I finish up some paperwork."
They nodded, and Risa guided them down the stairs to the kitchen. Tanya just smirked at their backs.
He'd be giving both Gerrard and the Succubi a heads up about their growing interest. Depending on how much information they gave her, he should be able to pass on some tips for obfusticating or delaying them.
His smirk faded into a sigh. It would be so much easier if they could operate in the open. The Succubi had obviously looked into that option decades ago. According to his meeting with them last week, after Sena had tried to ambush him with a meeting about the Association, they'd looked into pretending to be Mages that knew esoteric spells or a strip club that offered special services. Unfortunately, both options came with too much oversight and the risk of discovery.
He honestly didn't know why they wouldn't offer their services to women as well, beyond their vague assertions that it 'wasn't proper' and that they 'couldn't do it right.'
He shook his head. He didn't want to have to keep dealing with the problem, although how to actually take care of the problem for long enough that it wouldn't be a problem again until after he stepped down was a conundrum. Perhaps Sena could be promoted to a position in another town, or recalled from this one?
Sena had been acting oddly towards the end of their conversation about the pornography…
He shrugged and headed for the stairs. "You two coming, or do you want to prepare for the next one?"
"Next one," Visha said. Lorelei groaned about the never-ending paperwork, which earned a light punch on the shoulder. Tanya smiled at them and then headed downstairs.
There was another meeting to prepare for, after all.
-OxOxO-
Once again, Tanya was sitting at the head of the large table in the meeting room on the second floor of their house. As the men and women filed into the room, led by the pair of servants on loan from Walter, as well as Visha and Lorelei, he studied them. A mishmash of suits and ties and pants and the odd dress from her last life dyed curious colors met her eyes, all of it of good quality, accented by flourishes of this world in the form of pins or medallions of the symbol of the two cults, capes, headbands, rings, and piercings. Little of what the assortment of people wore would have met the regulations for proper dress in either of his lives.
He smiled. "Welcome to my home and the seat of the town's political authority. I'm sorry to say I do not recognize many faces among you, so if you wouldn't mind, please introduce yourselves – who you are, and who you represent. I'll go first."
He rattled off his name and his official position in Axel, and they began introducing themselves. From the braggards to the brownnosers to the quick to the monotonous, they introduced themselves and the men and women they represented: the heads of the guilds of and in Axel.
He paid their words little attention. By the end, the only thing he'd taken note of was of the guilds who had not sent representatives.
He looked up to find that most were sitting on the edge of their seats, leaning towards him as much as they could without moving the chair. Perhaps they were trying to create a sense of formality?
"To begin," Tanya said with false warmth, "while the missive I received was a touch vague, I gather that you all are here because of my talk with your guilds' representatives to the Greater Guild Group?"
The man sitting to his left, snow-white beard neatly trimmed to show off his smooth, youthful skin, smiled and answered for them all. "Not at all, sir!"
Tanya fought not to raise an eyebrow. "My apologies, then," he continued, mentally rolling his eyes to keep the skepticism from his face. "What then are you here to discuss?"
"Why," said the wide smile of the woman to his right, "to discuss your attempt to defeat the Demon King. After your many exploits here in Axel, our guilds are interested in helping however we can, though some discussions have already been had about how best to provide aid."
He could have picked the words of the magenta-haired woman apart, starting with her word choice and finishing with the true meaning behind the words 'provide aid,' but he waited.
Tanya had some verbal shovels he wanted them to begin digging their metaphorical graves with, after all.
"I think I understand," he said after a moment's indecision, "and I'm glad to have their help. What rate would the loans-"
"No, no," said the man on the left, waving his right arm, which seemed to be bereft of a hand, "Favorable loans are certainly possible, but we come bearing donations to a good cause, as well as a few recommendations the guilds thinks you could take on hand to more… efficiently bring about your victory." His smile was bright like plastic, and he paused a few times throughout the speech.
Tanya kept a smile from his face. "I couldn't possibly ask such a thing of the guilds. The economy might be doing better locally than the national average, but with how badly things have been since… well, some are calling it Eris's Breaking, regardless," he said, cutting off any potential objection about that particular nomenclature, "I couldn't ask such a thing of Axel's guilds. Such money would be much better off in the hands of those most capable."
"Nonsense, my girl," said the woman, trying to wave away Tanya's concerns. "Our guilds would never besmirch your noble blood by implying they knew better than you."
"You're sure?" he asked, injecting caution into his voice. With all of his work so far, they'd never believe he was as naive as his youthful appearance might suggest, but he could always get them to lower their guard another way, and Tanya could honestly claim to have never been offered a bribe this transparent before. In that sense, he really was inexperienced.
"Of course, darling," said the woman. "The guilds want to work with you, not against you. A strong party and determination are all well and good for adventuring, but taking down the Demon King's Kingdom will require economic backing."
True, but he didn't need the guilds for that. "You don't think I have enough already?" he asked her. She opened her mouth to reply, but Tanya cut her off. "After all, I'm the governor of Axel, I have the support of Ignis Ford Dustiness, the head of a grand family, most of the nobility that inhabits or surrounds Axel, a large swath of Axel's population, and a personal friendship with Princess Iris. You don't think that's enough?"
The woman responded automatically, though Tanya could see a few of the quieter members of the sea of unfamiliar faces stare. "No expense can be spared. I've been around long enough to remember the decades of fruitless attempts, and, if you don't mind the advice, anyone trying to take that perfidious Demon King down would need all the help they could get, even you."
"Well, alright," Tanya said, "the guilds had some advice for me?"
"Indeed," said the man, the corners of his smile not quite as high as they were before. "They were wondering if it might be possible for you to rollback some of the, ah, declarations you made during your get-together with the representatives of each guild to the GGG. With how much has been made this year, they are keen on paying their taxes."
"I… don't know if that's a suggestion I can take on board," Tanya said with regret. "I'm almost positive that those proposals are going to be very popular, to say nothing of the gains in efficiency. Besides, I'm a man of my word."
"Oh, Tanya," said the man, "that's why the guilds exist! You may be 'sure' of something, but that doesn't necessarily make it so it will be. If you'd just brought your concerns to the guilds directly, everyone could have gotten their way without any harm done, and your ideas could have been debated and tested and disseminated from the top of the guild."
"Besides," said the haughty woman, "the masses are fickle. You can simply say that you managed to make an agreement with the guilds that makes everyone happy without damaging them. I highly doubt other members of the nobility will care overmuch, as long as they receive their taxes. No one has to lose their job, and everyone gets to make more money."
"Well…" he trailed off, his eyes flicking to the leather satchel that had been set on the table by the man two seats down. He looked back at the man with the white beard. "What kind of support do they want to offer? And you said something about a donation? Is it armor or materials or…"
They were all smiling once more. "Well," said the man, a low current of speculation beneath his breath, "while the banking guild declined to send a representative, once you have proven you wish to work with the guilds, they might be amenable to favorable loans or debt forgiveness, either for you, the nobility, or the Mithril Foundation, all of whom would be grateful to you. Perhaps, if you might introduce us to some of the upstanding men and women you've employed in Axel's government, we could also see that some funding allocated to the city guard and police is instead used to subsidize adventurers who meet certain criteria – to be decided at your discretion, of course. In the end," he finished, clasping his good hand over the knot of cloth that capped his stump, "I would think anything is possible."
"This all sounds good," Tanya said, slow and even. "However, I'm sure you all know how poor it will look for me to go back on my word. I'm unsure I could calm everyone down," he admitted.
"You'll probably need to give those you spoke with directly a more… personal touch – we would have to confer with our superiors what could be promised specifically, but better positions in your administration or in our organizations would certainly smooth any ruffled feathers."
"More immediately," the woman said, gesturing with a magenta fingernail to the briefcase, "To prove how much the guilds believe in both your tenure as Governor and your quest, we present to you, our collective donation."
The man who'd carried the leather satchel opened the top and slid it across the table. It stopped just short of Tanya.
Inside were Eris, mostly of the higher denominations. He doubted there were any of the ridiculous denominations inside, but gold ones were the lowest he could see.
He raised his eyebrows, fighting to keep a grin from his face – though they wouldn't blame him if he did smile. It was a lot of money, after all. "This is all for me?"
The man smiled. "Indeed, for you to use at your discretion, while placating the people who took to heart you premature words, or in whatever tasks you must accomplish while preparing to fight the Demon King."
Finally, finally, he let himself smile. The expression crawled across his face as satisfaction suffused his mind. "If that is true, I must thank you all for clearing up this misunderstanding," he said. The concerned looks finally broke into the open, but he ignored them like he'd ignored their names.
"I thought getting the guilds in line might take months. Instead, you've helped ensure they'll be taken care of in weeks. Thank you all very much!" he declared.
The wall behind him slid up into the ceiling, an illusion like his clothing. He looked back over his shoulder. Now revealed to the rest of the room was Sena, Lorelei, and a small table with paper and ink scattered atop it. Lorelei looked exhausted from taking notes, but Sena looked furious.
"You're all under arrest for attempting to bribe an elected official!" she shouted. Out of the door at the front of the room, Visha and Aloerina appeared, clad in the cloaks Aloerina and Sena had worn on their way into the building.
Sound erupted, but police began to file into the room after Visha and Aloerina, and Tanya sighed in satisfaction. With these fools apprehended, their bosses and compatriots were likely to follow them. With any luck, most of the remaining rot would be removed, those left wouldn't try anything dangerous, and the guilds would transition from being a monopoly to regular businesses.
Regular businesses who would do what she said with a smile on their face and government contracts in their pockets. Whether they were the guilds wearing new faces or young blood springing up from former employees or refugees, businesses would be happy to take her money and provide her with her weapons.
He let out another satisfied sigh and turned to Lorelei. "Don't you love it when a plan goes well?"
"Maybe if my hand didn't hurt so much," she griped. Tanya snorted at that, and he moved to help Lorelei pass out the notes she'd taken to the police, who were wrangling the uncooperative crinimals.
-OxOxO-
"Is he really that anal about how you dress?"
"Lorelei!"
"What? You know what that word means, and what I meant. Don't even try to harp on my language." She paused. "And if you do anyway, don't expect me to call you names over it, Lalatina."
"DON'T-"
The Crusader, sans armor and fighting regalia and instead clad in a sweater, coat, dress, and hat for the cold gust that was ripping through Axel today, cleared her throat. "Don't call me that, Lorelei. I am Darkness! Do you hear me? Darkness!"
She picked at the cabbage in her salad. "Why'd you even pick that name, anyway?"
She looked down, blushing and mumbling, and Lorelei, clad in even heavier coats, clothing, and armor, couldn't tell if this was her being Darkness or her being actually embarrassed. She squinted, trying to make the call.
She sniffed, imperious, as her head tilted up so she could look down it. "For your information, we are both rather conscious of how I dress. It is only proper that I, heir of the Dustiness family, a grand family of Belzerg, Sword of the Kingdom and Shield of the Royal Family, am shown to be a proper prim lady befitting of my station as one of His Highness's most trusted allies."
Lorelei raised an eyebrow. "First of all, I'm shocked your manservants or whatever don't know about your… you-ness, if they still think of you as a 'proper prim lady.' I doubt it. Second, for saying all of that," Lorelei said, "instead of just going, 'oh, I care how I look and he does too,' I'm calling you Lalatina again-"
"LORELEI!"
Lorelei snickered underneath Darkness's light punch, and Darkness huffed, exasperated but happy. They turned back to their food. They weren't at Darkness's house like Lorelei had suggested because her father would want her to dress her best, even if she was entertaining a friend. They weren't anywhere too fancy, because Lorelei insisted on paying her fair share. They'd settled here, which Darkness had come two with her Thief friend, back before she'd been aware she was a terrorist bent on killing Tanya.
This break was exactly what she needed. No more writing, no looking over her shoulder for a threat that might not come that would murder her and grind whatever was left into paste, if this Mary Sioux was half as scary as those two made her out to be.
"Anyway," Darkness said, moving the conversation back to where it had been before their tangent, "What are they doing now?"
Lorelei shrugged, biting a bit of carrot in her salad. "They said they were meeting with Mitsurugi's teammates, eh…" she trailed off, then shrugged and ate another bit of salad. "I can't remember their names. Anyway, they're seeing how he's doing and figuring out what to do with him while they try to get him off the hook. I got tired of watching them talk."
More than getting tired of the talking, though, she'd wanted to get out of that house. She could feel their paranoia leaching into the air, and even if they managed to forget for a time, the specter of the Bloody Valkyrie kept sneaking up on them. It kept her more wired than coffee.
"Ah," she added, taking another bite to make sure her mouth had some food in it while she was talking, "that does depend on if they finished with the criminals. I don't think it'll take too long to confirm their guilt, though."
Darkness's thoughtful expression faded into a smile. "That's good to hear. While there is very little violent crime in Belzerg, it does seem like consensual crimes have been plaguing Axel to an unacceptable degree. I'm glad to see it gone… and how methodical Tanya is being with it."
"Oh?" Lorelei said, snacking down on her salad. She'd been hoping to get a bit of a rise out of Darkness for the unseemly habit of Lorelei's, but it seemed she'd given up on 'instructing her on proper manners' like she'd promised back during the trip to the Crimson Demon Village.
Darkness's nod was emphatic. "Indeed. My father can often be either erratic or bullish and headstrong in how he goes about enforcing the law."
Lorelei hummed. "Huh. That's about what I'd expect, honestly – my hometown was small enough that the only government was the blacksmith who'd volunteer as a judge and the carpenter who acted as the mayor. With how few of us there were, those jobs mostly just existed on paper."
Darkness hummed back, and they faded back into comfortable silence. Home…
"What'll happen to them after they get convicted?" Lorelei asked to take her mind off of her hometown.
Darkness shrugged. "Well, I suppose those who are able could get sent to the front, if they preferred that to jail time. You said they're testifying?" she asked. Lorelei nodded. "Then they might get off with just a mark on their record, if they help apprehend someone important enough… or, I suppose, if they have connections."
"Really?" Lorelei asked. Darkness sighed. "Unfortunately. There aren't enough people that those who could be doing something useful can be allowed to sit in jail too long, even if the tasks they do afterward are menial or dead-end."
She frowned as she spoke, sighing as she finished. Lorelei let the silence hang for a moment so she could actually dig into her salad – the last thing she wanted was for a gust to blow through and spirit her food away. "Wish things were different?"
She blinked. "Huh? Oh, no, I was just thinking of Kazuma." She shook her head. "I can't believe he's become even more of a shut-in! That much laying around can't be healthy. I know he's his own person and that he's stubborn as a mule," she ranted, "but he is part of my party! Is he even going to be capable of keeping up with us when spring rolls around?"
"Could he keep up with you before?" Lorelei asked. Darkness opened her mouth to answer, but Lorelei continued. "Besides, I wouldn't blame you. It sounds like you care about him a lot." Her tone was the perfect picture of innocuous innocence.
Darkness's response faltered into a glare and a raised eyebrow. "And what is that supposed to mean?"
Lorelei's shrug was exaggerated. "Nothin'. It just seems like you care about him a lot, and he seems to be your type, is all." The second part of her sentence came out in a rush.
This time, Darkness's blush was from horniness. "No way! Even if he does berate me and abuse me and… leave me to be ravaged by enemies… oh that forest had so many strong monsters… why must father…"
Lorelei just rolled her eyes and snapped a finger in front of her friend's face. "Don't make me bring out the 'L' word."
She recoiled, ecstatic. "Lewdness?!"
"Lalatina," was Lorelei's flat reply.
"That's IT!" she cried, sending part of her meal off of her plate. "What are your tastes? If you're going to tease me with my name, give me that much at least!"
Lorelei snorted at her tone, then settled into quiet as she mulled over the question. Darkness was about to say something, maybe about not meaning the question, when Lorelei answered. "Well, I'm… not really sure I have any," she admitted. Darkness raised an eyebrow, confused.
"I mean, I definitely didn't have any weirdo fetishes like yours," she explained, pointing a fork at the blonde Crusader, as predictable as the moon with how she blushed, "before I became a Monsume. After though… I just don't really feel it anymore."
She quieted for a moment. "It wasn't what I was expecting… not that I had many expectations for what happened to me." She muttered the last part.
She'd tried a number of times, when the shock and dread of the first few weeks had faded into grudging acceptance, and again one lonely night with one of Tanya's translated books, but nothing really seemed to do it for her anymore. She could do it, but it wasn't really… enjoyable anymore.
"Any proof?" Darkness asked, still speculative. Lorelei shrugged her shoulders. "My boyfriend," before she'd been dumped for getting fused with a rabbit, "had mauve hair and bright-white eyes. He was five six, average physique, and…"
She sniffled, looking down at her food. "He used to flip his hair over his face and pretend to be a zombie. Said I'd complained about him not being a morning person one too many times."
She shook the memory away. She already had enough going on without bittersweet memories distracting her.
A flash of guilt passed over Darkness's face when she looked back up at her. "Ah, so, pretty average?"
Lorelei nodded, but she couldn't say that about him aloud.
"I'm over it," Lorelei said, focusing back on the present by biting into another piece of vegetable. "How are things at the church? I haven't been able to come in as often as I like."
She still managed to make it on Sundays, but things were very tense during morning service, and the only things being read were the broadest scriptures and quotes both sides of the Break could agree on.
"The disagreement's being kept out of the church's premises, officially," Darkness said. She leaned forward, "but unofficially, people are starting to take sides. I'm glad there's been no fighting yet at least-"
"What? Yeah there has," Lorelei contradicted.
Darkness waved a hand. "Other than on the first day-"
"Even then," Lorelei continued. "It's being kept quiet, but I know there's been some fighting. Tanya had to talk to the police about it."
Darkness blinked owlishly. "But I thought…"
She shook her head. "Well, then there hasn't been enough that people aren't fighting in the streets over whether Eris is…"
She gulped. "Dead?" Lorelei finished, voice quiet as a mouse. Darkness's nod was slow. "Yes, whether Eris is that and she gave birth to twins, one of whom falsely claims to still be Eris, or whether Eris did not die and another bit of her has become misguided."
The wind picked up, and they both shivered.
"Yes, they can't both be telling the truth," Darkness continued. That hadn't been a problem when it was Eris and Aqua arguing, because that was just something they did. Now it was a problem. "I wish they'd just contact their faithful and clear up the confusion," Darkness sighed. "Are… you considering…"
Lorelei's face screwed up in concentration. "With-" she sighed. "When I became a monsume, I asked a bunch of Priests what that meant. They could all quote the same scripture, but what it actually meant to them changed." She scowled. "And that was only if they gave me the time of day." A number she'd tried to talk to hadn't 'dared' speak with her, for fear of becoming just as unlucky as she obviously was.
She sighed again. "I'm not sure which to pick."
Darkness's head gained a slight tilt. "'Pick?' Eris is Eris, isn't she?"
The conversation petered off for a moment. Well, that probably answered their mutual question for each other, then.
Lorelei licked her lips. "In the end," Lorelei said, "We'll just have to wait and see, and… I hope that if we do pick… differently, we'll still be friends."
Darkness scoffed. "But of course. I've remained in Kazuma's party despite Aqua, have I not?"
Lorelei nodded. Eris, or Chris? Which would she pick? Eris or…
Lorelei frowned. Where had she heard that name before? And what did it mean? Was it just a play on the name Eris, or was it because Eris was known for liking a flower by the same name?
Her frown deepened into a scowl. She could swear she'd heard the name Chris somewhere-
BOOOOM
Her head twisted towards the distant explosion. It seemed bigger today. "Oh, there's-"
She was cut off by Darkness's cursing. Lorelei raised an eyebrow, and Darkness hurried to explain as she rose. "There's no way Megumin convinced him to go with her, which means it's either Yunyun or Aqua with her. If it is Aqua…"
Her hurried expression gained a shade of giddy eagerness. "Then there's no doubt, with how bad their Luck is, that they'll get into trouble. I have to go save them!"
"Without any armor?" Darkness nodded once.
Lorelei's gaze narrowed. "Are you hoping they woke the hibernating Giant Frogs?" Darkness nodded several times, emphatic, and Lorelei sighed. "Well, you better hope Yunyun isn't with her. She might kill them before they get big enough to-"
"SEE YOU!"
Lorelei just shook her head, waving at her as she left… until she remembered Tanya had asked her to talk with Darkness if she wound up meeting with her.
Cursing under her breath and shoving a handful of money onto the table, Lorelei muttered, "Hurrying Hare!"
She bolted off, catching up with Darkness in twenty strides. Darkness did not stop running, so Lorelei didn't either. "Hey!" she shouted. "Tanya wants you to test the cultivation technique!"
"What?" Darkness asked, confused.
Lorelei grumbled while grabbing a balled wad of paper from her pocket. She cleared her throat and read from the page.
"In the effort to destroy the Demon King, Tanya von Degurechaff, Governor of Axel, has issued the following quest: monsters brought back to Axel instead of killed will be paid out at three times the normal rate."
Darkness's eyebrows shot up, though she wasn't looking at Lorelei. She had to keep staring forward to make sure she knew where she was going. Lorelei was just following her direction, with the occasional glance and adjustment thanks to Hare-Trigger Senses.
"It'll go up on Monday, with the Monster Rush in mind. She wants to test the efficacy of the Level-Reset potions beforehand-"
Darkness stopped on a dime, and Lorelei had to scramble back to where Darkness was standing ramrod straight, staring unerringly into Lorelei's eyes. "He's going to… to give me…"
Lorelei gave her a short nod. "Once or twice. He wants you to actually try to kill a few things, just to make sure you gain Skill Points at a constant rate once your level goes down."
She giggled, but not in the way she usually laughed. No, she sounded positively Tanya-like. She began to mutter under her breath… when her gaze snapped up to Lorelei.
"Hey. It had to have hurt for you to become a Monsume, right?"
Lorelei gave the woman a flat stare and a groan of disgust. "Darkness," she admonished.
Carefully, she did not actually say that it had. Partially, she didn't say anything because she wasn't sure she could do the feeling justice. More than that, however, she didn't say anything because she wasn't sure Darkness wouldn't try it, damn the consequences of becoming a monsume.
Darkness pouted, but then she was off again, leaving Lorelei scrambling in her dust once more. She was still muttering under her breath, fantasizing about having her level reduced. "By the time I became a Crusader, I already had so many levels I wasn't encumbered by weaker enemies. How much more will the gut of a Giant Frog sting? How deep will the piercing blow of bamboo go?" She was panting heavily by the time they reached the front gate, and Lorelei could only shake her head at the passing comments about Darkness 'overworking' herself.
Lorelei tried her best to ignore it, wondering what she'd done to deserve such a hectic life… and such good friends.
-OxOxO-
A/N 1: If you'd like to donate to support me monetarily and read chapters a week ahead of time, search for Sugarcane Soldier on the website of the Patrons.
Thank you to WarmasterOku, Theewizzz, Afforess, UNSC_Kawakaze, Vee, malenkaya, and Saito Tachibana for supporting this story and everything else I write. Make sure to vote if you haven't yet!