LIGHTS, CAMERA, STEAM!

Written by Zack Wanzer, James Riddle and Cameron Stevens

Set during Series 9-10

Early one morning, Sir Topham Hatt addressed some of his engines at Knapford yards.

"I've been on the phone with some film producers these past few days," he announced, "and I am pleased to announce that they will be filming some scenes here on Sodor for a movie based around Ultratrain."

"Ultratrain, sir?" asked Rosie. "Who's that?"

"Ultratrain is a superhero locomotive from a comic book series," explained Sir Topham Hatt. "He is the leader of a group of engines known as the Carriages of Justice, and together, they thwart the evil plans of the nefarious Trainiac." He then showed the engines a few pages of a comic book in his hands. The illustrations depicted a heroic red and yellow locomotive with ten wheels facing off against a villainous purple locomotive with twelve wheels.

"Oh, wow," gasped Rosie, awestruck. "A superhero locomotive! I didn't know there was such a thing!"

"You'd be surprised, Rosie," chuckled Sir Topham Hatt, putting the comic book away. "Now then, the engines portraying Ultratrain and Trainiac will be arriving here within a few days, and I want you all to make them feel welcome, and try not to cause too much confusion while they film. Also keep in mind that your schedules will be adjusted in order to accommodate the production of filming."

Soon, the engines were off performing their usual duties, and none of them could stop thinking about the idea of being in the presence of engine actors.

"I remember when two of my sisters were told they were to appear in a film with Stanley Holloway in the 1950s," said Oliver. "I'm sorry to say it turned them into spoiled divas."

"One of my siblings appeared in a film too with Bernard Cribbins," said Duck, "but they were more humble about their role."

"That's Annabelle's favorite film, isn't it?" asked Oliver.

"Are trucks troublesome?" Duck joked.

"Most of them are," laughed Oliver, "but you'd be surprised at the rare chance where trucks could actually be friendly."

"Hopefully the actors are good engines to get along with, though," said Duck. "I heard they come from overseas, one of whom is American."

Soon enough, the day came for the actor engines behind the Ultratrain movie to arrive. Edward was there to greet them at Brendam docks.

"Hi there," said one of them, who was painted in red and yellow. "This must be the famous Island of Sodor."

"It is indeed," smiled Edward. "My name is Edward. And who are you two?"

"My name is Lincoln," said the red and yellow engine, "and I hail from the Milwaukee Road in the good old United States of America!"

"And I'm Hunter," said the other engine, who was painted in purple and magenta. "I'm from Queensland, Australia. Do you think you could lead us to your sheds?"

"Of course," said Edward. "In fact, I'm on my way to Tidmouth very soon." Once Lincoln and Hunter were fired up, they followed the old blue engine to Tidmouth sheds.

It wasn't long before many of the engines wanted to meet with Lincoln and Hunter at Tidmouth sheds; naturally, curiosity was through the roof.

"We're very honored to have you two as guests on our railway," said Thomas.

"Oh, it is we who should be honored!" chuckled Lincoln. "Working alongside the ever famous Thomas the Tank Engine and his friends on the North Western Railway."

"You mean you've heard about us?"

"Of course we have, Thomas," said Hunter. "I've seen lots of kids carrying toy models of you and the others on my travels back in Australia."

"And you're big in America as well!" added Lincoln. "Especially on the Indian Valley Railroad."

"Wow…" Thomas mused. "I guess we're popular even beyond the United Kingdom!"

"Are you two going to play Ultratrain and Trainiac for the movie?" asked Percy.

"Indeed we are," said Lincoln. "I shall be playing the part of Ultratain, the hero of the story!"

"And I'll be the villainous role of Trainiac," said Hunter.

"Hehe! This is exciting!" giggled Emily.

"Shh! Here comes Sir Topham Hatt!" whispered Edward. Sure enough, Sir Topham Hatt arrived to greet the two visitors.

"Ah, Lincoln and Hunter," he boomed. "I trust your trip went smoothly?"

"It did indeed, sir," said Lincoln. "Your engines have been very welcoming with such hospitality."

"I'm not so sure about that big blue one over there," murmured Hunter, eyeing Gordon at the corner of the sheds.

"Oh, don't worry too much about Gordon," soothed Edward. "He's probably just tired after a busy day with the express."

"Now then, Lincoln and Hunter," continued Sir Topham Hatt, "director Keaton Sconderkis and I had a talk and he said that you'll start with the production of your movie tomorrow. For now, you must get some rest. I'm sure you'll need it after a long journey."

"Yes, sir!" Lincoln and Hunter said together.

"It's been a pleasure to meet you all," said Lincoln. "And who knows? Perhaps some of you might make a few cameo appearances!"

"Ahh… A chance to shine on the silver screen…" sighed James, imagining himself in the background of the movie.

"Well, we'd better get going and rest now," said Hunter. "Cheers, mates!" And they both steamed away to the goods shed to rest. The engines were very impressed, except for Gordon, who remained unusually quiet…

The following day, Lincoln was being fitted with booster rockets on each side of his streamlined skirting near his cab, with a mohawk wing on top of his smokebox. Hunter, meanwhile, had a prosthetic nose fitted on his face, and even had some makeup done to his teeth. Rosie was shunting trucks nearby. She hadn't had the opportunity to meet Lincoln and Hunter yet, so she stopped alongside the goods shed to speak to them.

"Um… h-hello…?" Rosie squeaked nervously, catching Lincoln's attention.

"Oh, hello there!" smiled Lincoln. "Who might you be?"

"I'm… Rosie. You've probably not heard of me before–"

"You're one of those S100s built for the Second World War, aren't you?"

Rosie was surprised at how quickly Lincoln recognized her basis. "Er… yes, I am," she replied. "I was one of fourteen sent to work for the United Kingdom under the Southern Railway."

"Well, I must say, you have served your country well, my dear!" smirked Lincoln. "Hey, Hunter, come and meet Rosie!"

Hunter glanced over to Lincoln. "What is it now?" he huffed. "Can't you see I'm busy getting ready for our first shooting?"

"It'll only take a minute or two," insisted Lincoln. "This is Rosie, one of many S100 tank engines built to serve railways all around the world during wartime!"

"Er… hello…" Rosie said sheepishly. "I do apologize if I'm bothering you…"

"Oh, that's quite alright, miss," sighed Hunter. "Forgive my rudeness; this prosthetic nose is just so ruddy itchy!"

"That aside, we're just getting ready for the first shooting of the movie," explained Lincoln. "It is quite exciting, yet I am nervous at the same time."

"Why?" asked Rosie. "I thought superheroes didn't get nervous."

"Even the bravest of us don't always have nerves of steel," said Lincoln. "I just hope that my performance is good and I memorize my lines well; otherwise, the slightest slip up could be most embarrassing."

Rosie's face fell with concern. "Oh… I'm sure you'll do just fine," she said, hoping to cheer Lincoln up. "And besides, even if you do make mistakes, I'm sure they're nothing to worry about." But Lincoln wasn't so sure. At that moment, the film's director, Keaton Sconderkis walked up.

"Ah, Rosie," he said. "I'm glad you've come. As director of the movie, I've spoken to Sir Topham Hatt, and he's agreed to let one of his engines help in moving the filming equipment. Would you like the honor of offering your services to us?"

Rosie's eyes widened with amazement at what she'd just heard; after all, how often was it that you got to help out in the making of a movie?

"Oh, would I!" she said eagerly. "I'd be honored to help out!"

When the other engines heard the news, they were very pleased for Rosie.

"Congratulations, Rosie!" whistled Thomas.

"Just save some of the special cameos for us!" pleaded James hopefully.

"Pah!" huffed Gordon. "It's only behind the scenes stuff. Hardly the biggest job for film production."

"Oh no, here he goes again…" muttered Henry, rolling his eyes.

"The acting, meanwhile," continued Gordon, "is seen as the most important part of the film, and is where all the action is. It's no wonder all those actors are so full of themselves!"

"Every job in film production is equally important," insisted Rosie. "Just as shunting coaches for the express is equally important in taking passengers to where they're needed. And besides," she added with a cheeky smirk, "you're in no position to say that actors are full of themselves."

The other engines laughed while Gordon groaned with resentment, before puffing away with the express.

Over the next several days, Rosie would help in any way she could while the film crews worked on the movie. On one of those days, she was surprised to see a group of four women with band instruments familiar with some of the engines.

"Rosie, is that you?" the lead musician called out. It was none other than Penny Percival.

"Penny?" Rosie gasped. "Well, this is a surprise. What are you and the rest of the Indigo Spyders doing down here?"

"We're partaking in filming for a music video to go with the movie," explained Eleanor, the band's bassist.

"I didn't know such a thing happened while filmmaking," remarked Rosie.

"Well, yeah," said Penny. "Lots of musicians have played songs for cinema. The Beatles, Elvis, Queen, ELO, Bowie, Elton, Prince… and unfortunately, Bryan Adams."

"Oh…" said Rosie, immediately understanding. "It's because of that song…"

"Yeah, well, thankfully, ours is nothing like it!" said Sadie, the drummer. "It's something that we've titled '(Faster Than) The Speed of Sight'."

"'Speed of Sight'?" asked Rosie, puzzled. "Don't you mean 'Speed of Light'?"

"It's already been taken," said Penny. "Sadie came up with the title while we were down at the arcade. We were at this one shooting game where you had to be as good with your eyes as you were with your shooting range. That, and Ultratrain needs a main theme."

"Ah, I see," said Rosie. If engines could move their smokeboxes, she would've nodded. "Well, I'd love to stay and listen to you play, but I've got work to do. I'll see you later, though."

With that, Rosie puffed away, leaving the Indigo Spyders to carry on practicing their song.

Meanwhile, at Maron, Lincoln and Hunter were rehearsing for a scene in the movie. They were donning their respective film characters as they did so.

"Hehehehe! You're too late, Ultratrain!" Hunter cackled as Trainiac. "Your chances of rescuing your precious passengers are about to be blown sky high!"

One of the producers was reciting the actions from the script. "'Trainiac's henchman then pushes a large red button,'" she read, "'blowing up the viaduct, leaving a large gap in the middle.'"

Lincoln, acting as Ultratrain, gasped with horror. "You dastardly fiend!"

"There's no way even you can cross that gap!" Hunter grinned, before cackling evilly once again. As Hunter laughed, Lincoln bore an expression that looked to be of despair, before becoming determined once again.

"I'll take that as a challenge!" he declared.

"'And from there,'" continued the producer, "'Ultratrain blasts his whistle and speeds towards the destroyed viaduct, his rockets firing, a steely gaze in his eyes. He approaches the end, but instead of plummeting to the abyss, he crosses the gap as if it was non-existent, landing safely on the other side!'"

"No!" Hunter gasped, a combination of shock and anger. "How is this even possible?!"

"Never underestimate the sheer will and might of Ultratrain!" Lincoln declared boldly.

"Alright, everyone!" Mr. Sconderkis declared. "I think we're just about ready to start filming."

"Mr. Sconderkis! We've got a problem!" cried one of the cameramen, running up to him. "We're out of film reels, and we need them for that particular scene!"

"Out of film reels?!" Mr. Sconderkis gasped. "Well, isn't that just peachy!"

"I'm afraid it's worse, sir," said a crewmember, holding a clipboard. "It appears that someone had forgotten to load the film reels onto the train back at Knapford!"

No one had noticed that another crew member went pale and silently and sheepishly slipped away. Mr. Sconderkis was furious!

"We've got a deadline to meet in completing filming today, and we can't risk going over time and budget thanks to someone's incompetence!" he shouted angrily. "How are we supposed to finish the movie without the reels?!"

"We could improvise, and make it an audio drama," a third crew member insisted innocently. Mr. Sconderkis merely slapped his hand to his own face before dragging it down in exasperation.

"I knew I should've signed up for the military," he muttered. "At least there, the stress would be justified…"

Rosie had arrived just in time to hear the commotion, and blew her whistle to get Mr. Sconderkis' attention.

"Excuse me, sir," she said, "but would it be too much trouble if I went back to Knapford and picked up those film reels? I'd be more than happy to rush back and get them so you can finish the movie on schedule."

"Ah, Rosie! What would we have done without you?" said Mr. Sconderkis, walking up to the lavender engine. "I'll make arrangements with Sir Topham Hatt so that you'll be able to help us without risk of being late to your own work."

Once Mr. Sconderkis had done so, Rosie was given the all clear, and she hurried away to Knapford as fast as her wheels could carry her.

"Good luck, Rosie!" called Lincoln. "We're all counting on you!"

Rosie thundered down the line as fast as her wheels could carry her, a brake van in tow.

"The film crew's counting on me!" she panted. "I can't let them down!"

However, in her haste to pick up the film reels, Rosie had forgotten to take on water, and her driver noticed the water levels getting dangerously low.

"We'll have to stop at Wellsworth to fill up your tanks," she said.

"But what about the film reels?" cried Rosie. "It could be ages before we get moving again!"

"Can't be helped, I'm afraid," said her driver.

Before Rosie could argue more, they heard a familiar whistle as James pulled in light engine.

"What are you doing down here, Rosie?" he asked. "Shouldn't you be watching the film crews or something?"

"I'm helping to pick up some film reels." And then Rosie quickly explained what had happened. "…but I don't know if my tanks will be filled up in time so I can get to Knapford. If you don't have any other jobs at the moment, could you please go and pick them up for me?"

"Sure thing," promised James. "Leave it to me!" With a sharp blow of his whistle, James raced off down the line.

At Knapford yards, Sir Topham Hatt was waiting for Rosie to pick up the film reels, now safely packed in a spare van. He was most surprised, instead, to see James puffing into the yards.

"James? What are you doing here?" he asked. "I thought Rosie was coming to bring the film reels back to Maron!"

"She was low on water, so she asked me to bring them over to her," James explained.

"I see," said Sir Topham Hatt. "Well, in any case, well done for helping to deliver them on time, James. I'll be sure to congratulate Rosie by the time she arrives."

As soon as James was coupled up to the van, he raced off as quickly, but carefully, as he could.

By the time James arrived back at Wellsworth, Rosie had just finished filling her tanks.

"Thanks again, James," said Rosie as the van was coupled up to her.

"No problem, Rosie," said James. "Have fun with your little movie cameo."

As James carried on his way, Rosie looked on as the red engine puffed into the distance. She was surprised that not once had he asked what would be in it for him. Before she could say anything, the guard's whistle sounded, and Rosie puffed away. But as she left, an idea flew into her smokebox.

Back at Maron, Lincoln, Hunter and the film crew were still waiting for Rosie to return.

"We may as well pack it in," Mr. Sconderkis sighed. "At this rate, we'll never get the film finished on time!" Suddenly, everyone heard a familiar whistle.

"Wait, that whistle," exclaimed Hunter. "Could it be…?"

"It is!" cried out Lincoln. He then looked ahead and beamed. "It's Rosie!"

Sure enough, Rosie came hurrying around the bend with all the film reels safely packed into the van, tired, but triumphant.

"Sorry I'm late!" panted Rosie. "I brought you the film reels you wanted!"

Mr. Sconderkis looked inside the van, and was overjoyed and relieved, as were the film crew members, Lincoln and Hunter.

"It looks like filming is back on!" declared Mr. Sconderkis. "Thank you so much for delivering them, Rosie. You are a clever engine!"

"Well done, Rosie!" whistled Lincoln. "I knew you could do it!"

"Yes, well done, indeed," added Hunter.

"Ah, well…" smiled Rosie modestly. "I had a little help along the way. I asked James to help me pick up the film reels while I was filling up on water. I only finished what I had started."

"Well, the important thing is that you made it back," said Mr. Sconderkis. "Now we can finish filming on schedule."

And they did too. After setting up their cameras to take several angles, including one attached to Harold the helicopter, filming got underway for the scene in which Ultratrain jumped the destroyed viaduct. A prop bomb was placed in the middle of the viaduct, and after a shot of it close to being ignited was filmed, the cameramen afterwards filmed Lincoln racing towards the viaduct, as if he was jumping the gap.

"But what about the actual explosion itself?" asked Rosie.

"We'll soon be filming that in a studio with scale models," explained Mr. Sconderkis. "The same thing will be done when Ultratrain makes his leap of faith."

"Us engines aren't expendable, Rosie," added Lincoln. "That's why they make dummy engines so that we don't get severely damaged while filming. I met an engine from the Sierra Railroad who's been in many movies, and in one of them, her character was driven to near-bursting point pushing a time-traveling car up to 88 miles an hour before flying off an unfinished trestle bridge!"

"Ouch!" cried Rosie, shocked with what had just been described to her. "I can only imagine how painful that could've been."

"Don't worry, she's still alive and kicking," assured Lincoln. "And she's probably got a couple of more movies left in her if another studio comes knocking at the door."

"On the subject of movies," Rosie spoke up, "I was wondering if there was a request I could make in regards to this one…"

After a few more days, the film crew left Sodor, as did Lincoln and Hunter, and everyone's lives continued as if no filming had ever taken place to begin with. However, several months later, Keaton Sconderkis and some of the film crew returned to Sodor with the finished cut of Ultratrain: The Movie. Some of the engines – Rosie being among them – were gathered at Knapford station to watch the film from a projector, and amongst the other people showing up at the premiere were the Indigo Spyders, as well as the rest of Penny's family.

"This is so exciting!" said Percy. "We get to be the first ones to see this movie before it's released in theaters!"

Everyone hushed up as the projector was turned on, and the movie began. As many cheered at many of the wondrous and exciting shots, the engines began to notice something even more interesting.

"Hey, that's me!" James gasped quietly as the red tender engine appeared in a shot.

"And there's me as well!" cried Gordon as he too appeared in another shot.

"I was also here for that shot!" Emily exclaimed at another point. Sure enough, several other engines found themselves being cameoed in the film as well.

"I may have made a few suggestions to the producers," Rosie explained innocently. "And besides, Gordon, I'm sure another famous engine like you would want to see his brother have his share of the spotlight on the big screen." Gordon couldn't help but beam at this.

Before long, almost two hours since the movie started, the end credits began to scroll, accompanied by "(Faster Than) The Speed of Sight" by the Indigo Spyders. Driven by the keyboards and electric guitar, according to Penny, the lyrics talked about never being afraid to take risks and diving into the unknown.

After the movie ended, Mr. Sconderkis addressed the crowd, who, by now, were applauding.

"Thank you, thank you," he said. "A lot of effort was put into making this movie the best it could be. There were a few near misses, which were thankfully averted thanks to some very quick thinking engines." He acknowledged Rosie and James, who beamed proudly.

"We look forward to what future films we may consider," Mr. Sconderkis continued. "And rest assured, Sir Topham Hatt and the North Western Railway are always welcome to make guest appearances in our works."

"Did you hear that, everyone?" grinned Thomas. "Looks like we could be appearing in a sequel!" Everyone just laughed.

"I guess we'll have to see what the box office says," said Rosie.

Sure enough, everyone was satisfied with the movie, despite feeling a bit disappointed that Lincoln and Hunter couldn't attend. Especially Rosie.

A few weeks later, however, Rosie was shunting coaches for the Main Line Local when James, who was to take it, called out to her.

"Hey, Rosie! Take a look at this!"

Rosie looked over across the platform and gasped! There, nailed to the wall, was a poster of Ultratrain: The Movie with Lincoln and Hunter as their respective characters. And there, in the corner of the poster was none other than…

"That's… that's me!" gasped Rosie. "I'm actually on the poster!"

"It gets better!" grinned James. "Driver took his family out to see the movie and he says that it's become a box office hit! Probably due to the fact that some of us made cameo appearances."

Thomas was at another platform with Annie and Clarabel, and heard everything. "Looks like you got your wish after all," he smiled. "I think you should become a movie star."

Rosie blushed. "Yes, well… not too late, you know," she smiled modestly. "Perhaps they'll make a movie about us Sudrian engines one day, and that'll do well too!"

Eventually, there was a movie made about Thomas and his friends, but it wouldn't be quite what they were expecting… But that's a story for another day.

THE END

Author's Comments

This story took quite a while to write up, especially since me, James and Cameron got stuck at various points in coming up with ideas, but eventually, we managed to get it done! The characters of Ultratrain and Trainiac are both canon foreigners from the All Engines Go episode Super Screen Cleaners, and neither appeared to be based on a real-life engine. For Ultratrain (real life actor, Lincoln), I based him off of a Milwaukee Road Class A, with the mindset that people would usually expect the hero to be an American, and also because of my nostalgic love for I Love Toy Trains, which features models of the Class A in several episodes. I imagine Lincoln/Ultratrain sounding a lot like Dwayne Johnson. And as for Trainiac (real life actor, Hunter), since there are no 0-4-8s in existence, I went with a 4-8-0 instead, choosing the Queensland Railways C17 Class, and with his voice being that of Jemaine Clement; once again, going for the idea that a Brit (or in his case, an Aussie) is cast as the bad guy in cinema because they sound out of place. Finally, there's the director of Ultratrain: The Movie, Keaton Sconderkis, and I took inspiration from the fictitious director of This is Spinal Tap, Marty DiBergi, with his name being a portmanteau of four directors - Buster Keaton, Tony Scott, Wes Anderson and Robert Zemeckis, all of whom used trains in their films at one point. (See if you can guess why.) Of course, I had to make Rosie the lead character, as I wanted to do a bit more with her pre-Series 21, so this is before she gets repainted into red.

Upcoming stories:

- The Railway Dog

- Daisy and the Watermill

- The Boxcab and the Jester

- The Devil's Railway