Chapter 10
"Ittin balasy!"
Otabek rolled over on his back, the freezing ice seeping through the thin fabric of his T-shirt. Around him, everybody else had stopped what they were doing to stare in shock.
The session had only started fifteen minutes ago, but it had been an utter disaster from the moment Otabek stepped on the ice. It wasn't just the quad salchow. He could have handled that; he was (unfortunately) used to falling on those by now. The axel, too. It had never been the most stable of his jumps, so occasional falls were to be expected. But when he was falling on flips and freaking basic triple toe-loops...
JJ, the nearest person to him, rushed over to his side and kneeled down beside Otabek's prone body on the ice. The worry was evident in his grey-blue eyes, bringing back awful memories of the day of their collision.
"Hey, are you okay?" JJ asked softly, examining him for signs of injury. "Is it your back again? Did you hit your head? Hurt your ankle?"
Otabek shook his head, feeling bad for over-reacting and scaring JJ. The fall had hurt a little, but at most, he would probably be dealing with a bruise or two on his hip, nothing serious. "I'm fine." To prove it, he sat back up under his own volition. "Nothing broken but my stupid pride," he muttered, brushing tiny ice shards out of his hair.
"Are you sure?"
"Yeah, I'm good."
By that time, Nathalie had made her way over to them. "Otabek, what happened? Are you hurt anywhere?" she demanded to know, her face almost identical to JJ's worried expression from earlier. Without giving Otabek a chance to respond, she called to another one of the skaters nearby. "Timothy, go get Alain. He should be in the gym."
Otabek held up a hand. "No, don't. I'm fine, really," he insisted. "Just...frustrated."
He crossed his arms over his chest, hugging himself. The freezing temperature of the rink never bothered him much when he was in the middle of practice, but now that he wasn't moving, the cold chilled him down to his bones, not helped at all by his damp clothes.
Timothy looked back and forth between them, uncertain of whose orders he should follow.
"Never mind, Tim," Nathalie said with a sigh, rubbing at her forehead. "Go work on those spins. You need to get down lower if you don't want that sit spin to be invalidated in competition." In a louder voice, she added, "That goes for everybody else. Nothing more to see here, people; get back to practice!"
The other skaters, realizing that Otabek wasn't seriously hurt, returned to what they were doing before his fall – all except for JJ, who still hadn't left Otabek's side.
"JJ, that means you, too," his mother said sternly.
"But –"
"No 'but's. Go. Now."
"Yes, ma'am," JJ said, sparing one final look of concern toward Otabek before standing back up and skating away to work more on his quad lutz.
An embarrassed Otabek rose back to his feet. "I'm sorry for causing a scene again," he apologized once JJ was out of earshot. "It really was just a normal fall. I over-reacted."
Nathalie's face softened. "Come, let's get out of the way." Wrapping a motherly arm around his shoulders, she led Otabek over to the boards where his things were sitting and handed him his Team Kazakhstan jacket. Once he was zipped up – the jacket helped to fend off at least some of the cold – she made him take a drink of water before asking, "Now, what's going on? Why are you feeling so frustrated?"
"I don't know," Otabek said, swiping his arm across his mouth after taking a second sip. "Everything just feels...wrong lately."
Today's session had been, by far, the worst, but he'd been having jump troubles for a while now, at least for the past week or so – troubles that went beyond his seeming inability to master the quad salchow.
"Wrong, how? Mentally? Physically?"
"Um…" He wasn't quite sure how to explain it in English, the proper words escaping him at the moment. "Like my body isn't moving like it should? Everything feels...off. Weird." Otabek shook his head. "Sorry, I don't know the words."
"It's okay. I think I understand what you're trying to say, and I have to say, I'm not surprised you're having jump issues. I had a feeling this was coming."
A heaviness formed in the pit of his stomach, recalling what Mrs. Bychenko had said when he was getting measured for his new costumes. "Growth spurt?"
"I don't have a tape measure on me, but most likely. You are around that age."
"Dammit," Otabek swore, momentarily forgetting who he was speaking to. "Sorry. It just slipped out –"
Nathalie reached for Otabek's skate guards resting on the barrier and handed them over. "Take off your skates and do something else for a while."
Otabek's eyes widened. "You're kicking me off the ice?" Just for swearing? The Leroys generally forbade the use of profanity among their students at the rink, but "Dammit" was one of the milder swears, nowhere near as offensive as the expletive he had yelled in Kazakh when he fell.
"I'm telling you to take a break," Nathalie said. "If you keep skating like you have been, you really will end up injuring yourself."
"But I have to –"
"Trust me, okay?" She placed her hands on his shoulders, looking him directly in the eye. "I'll talk to Alain later, and we'll come up with some changes to your diet and off-ice workouts to help you make the necessary adjustments. This isn't our first rodeo, you know?"
He sighed. "Yes, ma'am."
"It's going to be okay," Nathalie said, giving him a reassuring smile as she patted his shoulder. "We'll get you through this. For now, just take the rest of the day off and try to relax."
Easier said than done, but Nathalie was right. Continuing to practice in his current mindspace would be counter-productive, likely doing more harm than good. Nodding his acceptance, Otabek skated over to the nearby gate and slipped on his skate guards before gathering the rest of his things and heading to the locker room.
Inside, he plopped down on the bench near his locker and took off his skates, muttering a string of profanities in Kazakh, Russian, and English under his breath as he untied his laces.
Fuck, why did his growth spurt have to start now, just weeks away from his first junior Grand Prix event of the season? Couldn't it have waited at least a few more months? How was he supposed to get a high enough season's best score to get an invitation to the senior circuit when he couldn't even do a fucking triple toe loop without falling on his ass?
"Dammit, dammit, dammit, DAMMIT!"
He needed to calm down.
Otabek inhaled a couple of deep breaths, then started stripping off his clothes. Thanks to being kicked off the session early, he hadn't really sweated enough to need a shower, but maybe taking one would help him cool his head.
After slipping on a pair of shower sandals and grabbing a towel and a small toiletry bag from his locker, he slung the towel over his shoulder and headed to one of the stalls located in the back of the locker room.
The steaming hot water was a welcome change from the freezing cold ice of the rink. For a long moment, Otabek simply stood underneath the shower head, head tilted back and eyes closed, and let the soothing water rain down on him…
...until a sob ripped through his throat.
Dammit.
He was being ridiculous. It was only a growth spurt. Every elite figure skater went through them at one point or another, and a lot of them adjusted just fine to their new bodies. It wasn't a huge deal, nothing to fucking cry about, yet he couldn't stop the tears from flowing, intermingling with the water droplets running down his face. He leaned forward and pressed his palms against the simple white subway tile surrounding the stall, his shoulders shaking as sobs continued to rack through his body.
"Beka?"
Otabek jumped at the sound of a door opening and his name echoing through the locker room. JJ? Was the session over already? How long had he been in the shower? Sniffling, he turned away from the shower head and swiped his hands over his face, hoping he didn't look too much of a mess.
"Beka?" JJ's voice became louder as he approached the shower area, his familiar red-and-white skate guards visible through the gap at the bottom of the curtain. "Hey, you okay in there?" he asked in a softer, more gentle tone.
Sighing, Otabek shut off the shower valve and ran a hand through his wet hair. He hadn't the chance to shampoo – or wash up at all, for that matter – but he no longer cared, his arm reaching through the side of the shower curtain for the clean towel hanging on the hook right outside the stall. "I'm fine. It's nothing," he said, quickly drying himself off.
"It doesn't sound like it," JJ said, pausing before revealing, "I heard you crying when I came in."
Damn, it had been too much to hope that the running water would be enough to muffle the sound of his sobs.
"I said, 'I'm fine,'" Otabek insisted, tying the towel around his waist before grabbing his unused toiletry bag and storming out of his stall back to the lockers.
JJ followed after him, arms crossed over his chest as he leaned back against the wall while Otabek changed into his street clothes. "Everybody has bad practices sometimes, Beka. It's not the end of the world."
Easy for him to say, Mister-Junior-World-Champion-Who-Easily-Got-Two-Spots-On-The-Grand-Prix-His-First-Senior-Season-Because-He's-Fucking-Canadian (And-Is-Actually-Just-That-Good,-Dammit).
"But what if it is?" Otabek pulled up his jeans, yanking up the zipper of his fly with more force than necessary. "This was supposed to be my season, JJ! I need to do well enough to earn a spot on the senior Grand Prix, but if this stupid growth spurt means I can't jump any more…."
"Hey, breathe." JJ pushed himself off the wall, stepping forward to take hold of Otabek by his upper arms. "This season isn't your last chance. You're only fifteen, and it's the beginning of a new quad; you still have plenty of time to prove yourself. You can stay a junior for a couple more seasons if you need to. There's no shame in that."
Well, yes, he was eligible to remain in juniors until he was nineteen… "But –"
"I get it," JJ said, cutting him off. "Growth spurts suck. I went through mine last season, and it was absolute hell."
Otabek scoffed, dropping his gaze. "Yeah, right. You won Junior Worlds."
"After bombing the Junior Grand Prix, remember?"
"Oh...right." He had forgotten about that. "You didn't make the Final…"
Letting out a bitter chuckle, JJ released his hold on Otabek's arms and plopped down on the long bench in between the two rows of lockers. "Man, I wasn't even close. Got off to a somewhat decent start with a fourth in Mexico, but by the time I competed in Poland a couple of weeks later, I had grown nearly half an inch since then, throwing me off most of my jumps. And on top of all the pressure to make the Final… 16th place!" He shook his head. "My worst result ever, by far. I...I almost quit men's skating after that."
"What?" Otabek had never heard anything about that. After pulling his T-shirt over his head, he took a seat beside JJ on the bench. "What do you mean, you almost quit?"
"I never made a public announcement or anything, but, yeah, I decided to become an ice dancer like my parents," JJ said, leaning back on his hands. "At least my height would be an asset there, instead of the hindrance it seemed to be in freestyle. I had already passed the dance tests needed to compete in junior ice dance just for kicks, so all I needed was to find a partner. Even had a couple of secret try-outs, but in the end…" He shrugged. "It just wasn't for me. I'm more of a solo act, you know? Besides, I loved jumping too much to give it up."
"I had no idea. How did you recover, then?"
"The possibility of going to the Olympics was a big motivator, I have to admit. Chan obviously had his spot in the bag, but with Reynolds having to withdraw from his two Grand Prix events due to boot problems, the second spot was up for grabs. If I beat him at Nationals, I had a chance of being named to the team, so I just listened to the advice my parents gave me and worked on adjusting to my new body. Though I didn't end up making the Olympic team, the bronze I won at my first senior Nationals was a huge confidence booster, and by the time Junior Worlds came around… Well, everything just...clicked."
"Oh." He made it sound so easy…
"Hey, you're gonna be fine." JJ wrapped an arm around Otabek's shoulders, pulling him closer. "One of these days, we're gonna share an Olympic podium together, I guarantee it. I'll be wearing the gold, of course, but you'll be right there beside me, making Kazakhstan proud."
"You really think so?" At the moment, just earning a spot on the senior Grand Prix circuit seemed like a pipe dream, much less winning an Olympic medal.
"I know so." JJ declared it with enough confidence that Otabek almost believed him.
He managed a small smile, feeling a little better. "So, you'll win the gold? Did you know that Altin actually means 'gold' in Kazakh?"
"Does it?" JJ mused, cupping Otabek's chin in his hand and turning his face toward him. "Well, Leroy means 'the king' in French, and the king always gets his gold in the end..."
"Yeah?" Otabek breathed, keenly aware of the close proximity of JJ's lips.
"Yeah..."
JJ leaned forward, bridging the small gap between them.
Just before his lips touched Otabek's, however, the door creaked open, the distinctive squeaking of someone's skate guards on the rubber flooring echoing in the quiet of the locker room. Heart in his throat, Otabek quickly broke away from JJ, never more grateful for the small privacy wall right in front of the door that blocked the locker area from immediate view.
"Hey, there you are, JJ," Timothy said as he came around the cinderblock wall. "Coach was wondering what was taking you so long. Did you find a replacement for your broken lace?"
JJ rubbed the back of his neck. "Uh, y-yeah, no. I kinda got sidetracked talking to Beka and forgot. Sorry."
Timothy gave Otabek a look of sympathy. "You okay, Otabek? That fall looked kinda bad from where I was standing."
Otabek sighed. "Yeah, I'm good. I'll live."
"Anyway, tell Maman – I mean, Coach – that I'm taking Beka home," JJ announced, which came as a surprise to Otabek.
"What?" He whipped his head around. "No, you should get back to practice. I can take the bus back to the house."
"This session is already half over anyway, and I've already done a run-through of my free. It's no big deal."
"But –"
Letting out a loud, exaggerated moan, JJ brought a hand to his forehead. "Ow, ow, ow, my head is absolutely killing me. Looks like I'm in no condition to be doing any more jumping today."
Timothy rolled his eyes, not buying the act any more than Otabek was. Still… "Fine, I'll tell Coach you have a bad headache and decided to go home with Otabek, but you owe me, JJ."
"Don't worry. A king always repays his debts," JJ said, grinning. "Thanks."
After Timothy left, Otabek turned to JJ, arching his eyebrow. "A headache, seriously?"
"Yeah, it just suddenly came on. Hurts like hell. Might be a migraine."
"Uh-huh. You're a terrible actor, you know that?"
"What are you talking about? That act was worthy of an Oscar!" JJ said with a boisterous laugh, patting Otabek on the shoulder before leaning down to untie his skate laces, which looked remarkably unbroken to Otabek's trained eye. "Whatever, put your shoes on and let's blow this joint. There's somewhere I've been wanting to take you."
"Where?" Otabek asked, standing back up and digging a pair of clean socks out of his skate bag in his locker.
"You'll just have to wait and see!"
Twenty minutes later, JJ pulled his car into the parking lot of a nondescript white building. The large sign posted near the front entrance identified it as the Loving Care Animal Shelter, the custom marquee underneath the logo reading "Will you be their fur-ever home?" in large block letters.
"An animal shelter?" Out of all the possibilities Otabek had come up with during the drive for where JJ might be taking him, he hadn't thought of that one. "You're not going to adopt a dog, are you? I thought you said your mother was allergic."
"No way. Are you kidding me? Maman would ground me for a lifetime if I tried to do something like that," JJ said, opening his driver's side door. "We're here for a different reason. Come on!"
Curious, Otabek got out of the car and followed JJ through the entrance of the shelter.
"Hey, JJ! This is a surprise. What are you doing here on a weekday?" a friendly-looking woman who was probably in her early forties asked from her seat behind the front desk. "You usually only come by on Sundays."
Smiling, JJ rested his elbows on top of the raised portion of the desk and looked down at her. "I happen to have the afternoon off from training, so I thought I would drop by and see if you needed any help."
The woman laughed. "Do you even need to ask? You know we can always use some extra hands. So, who's your friend? I don't believe we've met."
"This is Otabek," JJ said, slinging an arm around Otabek's neck. "He's the skater I told you about, the one who's staying with us."
"Oh, right! The guy from...Uzbekistan?"
"Kazakhstan, actually," Otabek corrected her. "Hello. It's nice to meet you."
"Nice to finally meet you, too, Otabek! JJ talks about you all the time. I'm Stephanie, by the way. Are you a big animal lover?"
"Beka loves cats," JJ answered for him, finally pulling his arm away. "I was thinking we could maybe play with some for a while, help socialize them?"
"Sure!" She pushed back her rolling chair and stood up. "Right this way. I'll take you two to one of our group rooms."
She led them down a long corridor, the white walls painted with cheerful murals of cats and dogs playing together, and unlocked a door near the end, showing them inside. The room was a good size, filled with cat trees, scratching posts, and litter boxes, along with a wooden bench for human visitors to sit on. Five adorable kittens, who all looked around the same age, were scattered around, engaged in their own respective activities.
Stephanie closed the door behind her, preventing any from escaping. "All the cats in here are roughly around six months old, as far as we can tell," she told them. "The two black ones are brothers. Jet and Onyx get along well with each other, but not so much anyone else – cat or human – so keep an eye on them. Cookie, on the other hand, loves playing with other cats, but she tends to be shy around people she doesn't know well at first. That's her, the calico playing with the mouse toy in the corner." To prove it, Cookie sprinted off to hide in a nearby cubby hole when she finally became aware of their presence.
"Over in the corner is Buster," Stephanie continued, pointing to a rotund orange cat eating from a bright red food bowl. "Believe it or not, he was just skin and bones when he was first brought here by somebody who found him roaming the streets. Now, he's thriving, but he does have a tendency to get territorial over his food, so we try to feed him separately from the others. And last, but certainly not least, is Sophie, who we call our 'princess'." She indicated the rather beautiful grey tabby laying on the window sill. "Sophie's a bit of a loner, very aloof, but she can be quite sweet if she decides she likes you. Anyway, I'll leave them all to you. If you need anything, just let me know. I'll be at my desk."
"Thanks, Stephanie," JJ said.
"So, this is where you always come after church?" Otabek asked once Stephanie left the room.
"Sometimes." JJ shrugged. "I try to make it at least once a month if I can, but there are a lot of charities I'm involved with. I have to admit, this shelter and the children's hospital are probably the ones closest to my heart, though. Madi loves coming here, too."
"Cool."
Otabek stepped further into the room, wondering which cat he should try to get to know first. The two brothers were currently chasing each other around the room, hopping up and down from the sturdy shelves attached to the walls, and Cookie had yet to emerge from her hiding place, obviously not ready to meet them yet. Otabek started to head toward Buster, but he held up his hands when the hungry cat whipped his head around and let out a loud growl.
"Okay, okay, I get the message," he said with a chuckle. No interrupting feeding time. He'd try again later, once Buster finished eating.
That just left the so-called "princess", who was staring out the window. It looked out to a fenced-in outdoor area where a couple of Golden Retreivers were playing fetch with a bright red Frisbee being tossed around by a young man wearing a similar uniform to Stephanie's. As quietly as possible as not to startle her, Otabek came up behind Sophie, placing a hand on the side of the window frame as he joined her in watching the dogs outside.
In the background, JJ took a phone call, answering in French. Though Otabek couldn't understand the majority of what was being said, judging by the number of "Maman"s he heard, he suspected JJ was getting an earful from Nathalie for skipping out in the middle of practice without her permission.
"Oh, somebody's in trouble…" Otabek trilled softly to himself, letting out a chuckle when Sophie unexpectedly meowed in reply. "You think so too, huh?"
Taking it as an opening, he held out his hand so that Sophie could get used to his smell. She ignored him at first, her tail elegantly swishing back and forth as she turned her attention back to the dogs outside, but it didn't take long for her curiosity to get the best of her, her pink nose twitching as she lifted her head to sniff at Otabek's extended fingers. After a brief investigation, she must have deemed him acceptable, for she stood up on her perch and began rubbing her head against his hand.
"Well, hello, there, Sophie," Otabek said, a faint smile crossing his lips as she allowed him to stroke the side of her face. "Or do you prefer 'Your Highness'?" She again meowed, and he let out a small laugh. "Yes, Your Highness. It's an honor to meet you, too. I'm Otabek, although some people call me Beka."
Sophie allowed him to pet her for a minute or so, nuzzling up against his hand, until she decided she had enough and turned her head away, meowing in JJ's direction. He was still on the phone, pacing around the room and trying not to get in the way of Jet and Onyx, who were now bolting across the room in streaks of black.
"Oh, that guy? That's JJ," Otabek said. "He sometimes likes to think he's royalty, too. King JJ, ruler of the ice…" He affectionately rolled his eyes. "But do you want to know a secret?"
Almost as if she understood what he was saying, Sophie looked back at Otabek and tilted her head inquisitively to the side. Otabek bent down closer to her height, bringing a hand to the side of his mouth as he whispered near her ear, "JJ's also my boyfriend."
Perhaps not quite as satisfying as revealing it to an actual person, but at least he could trust Sophie to keep their secret.
By that time, JJ had finally finished with his phone call and walked over to join them. "Hey, you two seem to be hitting it off," he said, smiling.
Otabek straightened his posture, returning the smile. "Yeah, the princess and I are becoming good friends, aren't we, Your Highness?" He resumed petting Sophie, lightly scritching her behind her ears. "So, is everything okay with your mother? She's not too mad you left, is she?"
"You could tell?"
Otabek shrugged. "It wasn't too hard to guess."
Running a hand through his uppercut, JJ sighed. "Maman's a little pissed off, but it's okay. I just have to wash all the dishes by hand tonight as punishment, no biggie."
"I'll help," he offered. After all, JJ never would have skipped out in the middle of practice if it wasn't for him.
"You don't have to. It was my idea to leave, not yours."
"I don't mind. I want – oh!"
Sophie had lifted herself up, standing on her hind legs as she placed her front paws on Otabek's shoulder and let out a loud "meeeeeooow".
"Looks like somebody wants some more attention!" JJ said, laughing.
Otabek joined in, running a hand down her back. "Are you feeling jealous, Your Highness?" he asked. "Is it okay if I pick you up?"
She meowed again, which Otabek took as a "yes", gently gathering the tabby in his arms. JJ, who had yet to put his phone back in his pocket, held it up and snapped a couple of pictures that Otabek hoped didn't turn out too terribly (although knowing his luck, he probably looked awful in them).
"You really are good with cats," JJ said with a fond look on his face.
"I don't know why, but they've always liked me." Smiling, he rubbed the underside of Sophie's chin. "Do you want to try to pet her?"
"Oh, uh, that's okay." JJ slid his phone back into his pocket, then pointed to a litter box in the corner of the room. "I noticed earlier that box is smelling a little ripe. Why don't I take care of tidying up the room while you enjoy playing with the kitties? The employees here appreciate it when volunteers take care of some of the necessary chores while they're visiting. Less work for them to do."
"Okay…"
Frowning, Otabek watched as JJ, clearly accustomed to where everything was located, grabbed a scooper and a small plastic bag from the cabinet near the door before kneeling down beside the litter box to clean it out. That was weird; Otabek thought JJ loved animals.
Carrying Sophie, who showed no sign of discomfort in his arms, he walked over to JJ. "Hey, you're not scared of cats, are you?" Otabek asked softly.
JJ glanced up. "What? No, of course not," he said, dumping a clump of litter into the plastic bag. "I admit I'm more of a dog lover, and I usually volunteer to take the dogs out on walks when I come here, but cats are great, too. I love them!" He sighed. "Unfortunately, they don't seem to love me. I don't have the magic touch like you do, I guess."
"Oh."
"Madi says it's because I come on too strong, which, yeah, I guess I can see," JJ continued, rising back to his feet and moving on to the next litter box. "I always seem to get scratched or bitten whenever I try to play with them."
"You do need to be patient at first before petting most cats, but I refuse to believe they don't like you," Otabek said. "Come on, stand up and I'll give you some tips on how to interact with them."
"Oh, no, that's okay… Really."
"JJ, come on."
"I'm busy cleaning..."
"Please? For me?"
"Okay, fine," JJ said. "Just let me finish emptying out this box…" He dumped another couple of clumps of litter into the bag, then loosely tied the top, setting the bag and scooper aside before standing back up and turning around to face Otabek. "If I get scratched or bitten, I'm blaming you," he warned. "Now, what do you want me to do?"
"First, you'll want to lower your voice," Otabek said. "Their ears are sensitive, so cats generally prefer it if you speak to them in a softer tone. If you talk too loudly, you can scare them off."
"Like this?" JJ spoke with a more gentle inflection than he had been using, his voice just barely above a whisper.
"Yeah, like that." Otabek smiled at him in encouragement. "Now, let her get used to your scent. Hold out your finger in front of her face and let her sniff you."
"O-Okay." After a moment of hesitation, he followed Otabek's instructions, his finger slightly wavering in the air.
Otabek frowned. "You really are scared, aren't you?"
"No!" JJ exclaimed, momentarily forgetting the volume of his voice.
A startled Sophie jumped out of Otabek's arms, running back over to sit on the window sill.
"See?" JJ's shoulders slumped in defeat. "I told you. Cats don't like me. Why don't I just leave you in here, and I'll go see if I can help out with the dogs?"
"No, don't go." Otabek reached for his hand, giving it a light squeeze. "Come on, let's sit down for a minute." He led JJ over to the bench, sitting down right next to him and resting his head against JJ's shoulder. "Just ignore them for a while and let them come to us. One of them is bound to get curious after a while."
"If you say so…" JJ said, wrapping his arm around Otabek and kissing the top of his head.
"I do." Otabek snuggled even closer against JJ, not unlike a cat himself. "Thank you, by the way."
"For what?"
"For bringing me here, even though you're afraid of cats."
"I told you, I'm not afraid –"
"Okay, fine." If that was what JJ wanted to believe, Otabek wasn't going to argue with him – even though he clearly was, at least a little. "It was still sweet of you."
"I just wanted to cheer you up," JJ said, rubbing Otabek's arm. "I hated seeing you upset like that."
Otabek sighed. "Skating means everything to me, JJ. It's as essential to my life as eating and breathing. If I don't get my jumps back…"
"Hey, no 'if'! You are going to get your jumps back. It's going to take some time, but you will."
If only he possessed some of JJ's over-the-top confidence…
Otabek's hands clenched into tight fists, his fingernails digging into the fleshy part of his palms. He wanted to believe those words more than anything, but what if he didn't? As confident as JJ was in his parents' ability to get him through his growth spurt, that was no guarantee. Months could pass with no improvement, and then what? This season was already shaping up to be a loss. His parents always said they would continue supporting his skating until he achieved his ultimate dream of competing in the Olympics, but training abroad was expensive, even with the raise his father recently received due to his promotion. How long would they give him to get his jumps back in order before deciding it was a waste of money for him to continue training in Toronto? If he had to move back to Almaty and leave JJ behind...
"Beka?" JJ lightly shook him by the shoulder. "Hey, you okay?"
Relaxing his fists, Otabek forced his melancholic thoughts to the back of his mind. JJ had brought him to the animal shelter to help take his mind off his skating woes, not to continue obsessively ruminating on them. He could worry about his jump issues later. For now, it was best just to enjoy the afternoon surrounded by his boyfriend and five very cute kittens.
"Yeah, you're right," Otabek said with a small smile, giving JJ a peck on the cheek. "I was freaking out, but – Oh!"
"What? Beka?"
He pointed to the spot on the other side of JJ. While they were talking, Cookie the calico had finally come out of hiding, slinking out of her cubby hole and jumping up to sit beside JJ on the bench. She regarded the both of them with a curious stare, letting out a small "meow" when JJ turned to the side to look at her.
"Oh!" JJ exclaimed softly. He glanced back over at Otabek. "Um...what should I do?"
"The same as before. Hold out your hand and let her get used to your scent."
"O-Okay…"
He did as Otabek said, bringing his hand a few centimeters away from her face. It didn't shake as much as before. Cookie immediately started sniffing, her nose getting closer and closer to one of his fingers until she started licking it.
JJ's eyes lit up. "She's licking me! She's licking me, Beka!" he said in an excited whisper, sounding like a little kid.
Otabek smiled. "Good! That's a great sign. Now, try petting the top of her head gently. You don't want to use too much force, especially at first."
"Like this?" He moved his hand to the spot between her ears and began lightly stroking her fur with his thumb. Obviously enjoying the attention, Cookie pushed back and rubbed her head against JJ's palm, a contented rumbling coming from her throat. "Oh, my God, is she actually purring?" JJ asked, his eyes widening in amazement. "I think she is!"
"Yeah, she's purring. That means she likes you."
"You think?" Encouraged, JJ ran a finger up and down the underside of Cookie's neck, her purrs becoming even louder. "Well, aren't you a sweet little angel?" he cooed. "Yes, you are, yes, you are…"
Otabek hid a chuckle behind his hand. He had never seen JJ look so, well, freaking adorable, a warmth burning in his chest as JJ continued murmuring lavish praise on the calico. "You know, speaking of angels, in Islam, cats are revered as the 'quintessential pet'," he revealed as Sophie, no longer frightened, hopped onto his lap.
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. They're believed to be ritually clean and thus are allowed to enter homes and mosques as they wish, so many Muslim families keep them as pets," Otabek said. "Even the food and water they drink is considered halal."
"Is that why you like them so much?"
He shrugged, gathering a meowing Sophie in his arms and scratching her behind her ears. "I wouldn't say that's really 'why' I like them, but there were always cats hanging around the mosque my family attends, so I played with them a lot when I was younger." And got in trouble for not paying attention to the imam… "I remember there was this one orange tabby cat who was especially attached to me. Everyone called him Yurik, and somehow he always managed to find me whenever I attended prayer services. A couple of the older ladies always laughed and said that I must have possessed a Yurik Beacon that called him to me whenever I was in range. I really wanted to adopt him, but the apartment where we lived at the time didn't allow pets, so somebody else eventually took him in."
He wondered what had become of Yurik. There was a chance he was still alive, although he would be quite elderly if he was. Otabek hoped his new family had taken good care of him. They had moved to Astana a few months after adopting Yurik, so it had been years since he last saw any of them.
"That's really cool," JJ said. "One day, you'll have to take me there and show me."
Otabek glanced up in surprise. "You...want to visit Almaty?"
"I mean, um…" A faint blush crossing the bridge of his nose, JJ rubbed the back of his neck. "Yeah, you know, maybe someday in the future? It would be nice to meet your family and see where you grew up."
But if he ever brought JJ home with him… Did that mean JJ was becoming more open to the idea of coming out and taking their relationship public? At the very least, it was the first time he had acknowledged the possibility of them having some kind of future together beyond simply sharing an Olympic podium.
"I'd like that," Otabek said with a soft smile.
By that time, Buster had finished eating and had come over to investigate, batting at the end of one of Otabek's shoelaces with his paw. Even Jet and Onyx had finally calmed down, although they kept their distance from the others, watching from their perches on one of the cat trees.
Otabek and JJ spent the rest of the afternoon playing with the kittens. JJ still seemed a bit wary of them at times, but he and Cookie became fast friends, the calico rarely leaving his side. Otabek, on the other hand, was in Cat Heaven, eventually even getting on the good side of the black cat brothers. He was teasing Jet and Onyx with a one of the provided cat toys – a bright rainbow-hued fish attached to a pole with string – when somebody knocked on the door. Stephanie, the receptionist, entered the room, again quick to close the door behind her.
"So sorry to interrupt, guys," she said, "but I have a prospective family who is interested in meeting the kittens. They're waiting just outside, so you two will need to wrap it up in here."
"Oh, that's okay. It's about time we start heading out anyway," JJ said, giving Cookie a couple of affectionate pats on the head before getting up from his spot on the floor, where they had been playing with an electronic mouse toy. "Beka, you ready to go?"
Not really, but it didn't seem like he had much choice in the matter. "Um, sure, I guess." Otabek walked over to the cabinet near the door to put the toy fish away, the two brothers following at his heels. "I'm sorry, but JJ and I have to go," he told them once he had placed the toy back in the box where he had found it, provoking a round of pitiful meows.
Stephanie chuckled. "Wow, I've never seen Jet and Onyx so attached to a volunteer before. Any interest in adopting them?"
"I wish I could, but Mrs. Leroy is allergic," Otabek said regretfully.
"Oh, right, I forgot you were staying with JJ's family. Well, feel free to come back for a visit whenever you'd like. We can always use more good volunteers."
"We will," JJ promised, joining Otabek by the cabinet. "Thanks for letting us play with them."
"Yes, thank you," Otabek echoed. "It was a lot of fun."
After saying their goodbyes to Stephanie and the rest of the kittens, they headed back to JJ's car. "So, feeling any better now?" JJ asked as he pulled out of the parking lot.
Otabek leaned back in his seat. "I do." His worries hadn't completely gone away, of course, but the kittens had provided him with a nice distraction, keeping his mind off skating for at least a little while. "Thanks again for taking me. I think I needed the break. Sometimes I get so obsessed with my skating that I…" He shook his head, sighing. "I don't know."
"Hey." JJ reached over, patting Otabek's knee. "It really is going to be okay. This is a little bump in the road, but you're a talented skater. You're gonna get through this, stronger than ever – I just know it."
Otabek managed a weak smile. He didn't know about that, but he appreciated JJ's confidence in him all the same. "Thanks."
A couple of nights later, Otabek was in the middle of writing a paper on Islamic love poetry for his online literature class when a Facetime notification from Leo appeared in the corner of his computer screen. He clicked to connect the call, Leo's face appearing on screen a few seconds later.
"Hey, man, long time, no see!" Leo said with a friendly wave. "I thought you said you would try to be better about keeping in touch."
Otabek inwardly cringed. He had promised that, hadn't he? "Sorry," he apologized. "I've been meaning to call, but –"
"Nah, don't worry about it." Leo laughed, waving it off. "It's not like I've been any better. It's been busy these past few weeks, what with training, learning new programs, and getting measured for costumes – which reminds me. I need to thank you."
"Thank me? For what?" As far as he was aware, Otabek hadn't done anything for Leo lately worthy of gratitude.
"I finally decided on my music for the free. It's 'Taking The Long Road Home' by Reckless Abandon."
"Oh." Otabek blinked. "You're also doing a Reckless Abandon song?"
"Yeah, I was inspired by your short program," Leo said, his smile fading. "Crap, I probably should have checked in with you and asked if it was okay first, huh? Oh, man, how pissed off are you on a scale from one to ten?"
"No, it's fine. Really." The news had taken him a little by surprise at first, but it wasn't as if they were using the same song. He didn't own the band; Leo was just as big a fan of Reckless Abandon as he was, possibly even more. Besides, Leo was using their song for his free, not his short, and they had been assigned different stops on the Junior Grand Prix. Unless they both made it to the Final, the only time they would likely compete against each other this season was at Junior Worlds, and even that wasn't a guarantee for Leo thanks to how deep the field was in the U.S. "I think it's a great choice for you," Otabek said honestly. "I can't wait to see it."
"Thanks." He breathed a visible sigh of relief. "So, what's going on with you? You've been like a ghost on Instagram. Don't tell me you've been secretly training the quad loop like everybody else seems to be doing this summer."
Leaning back in his chair, Otabek let out a bitter chuckle. "I wish."
"Training not going well?"
That was putting it mildly. His hips were still sore from all the falls he had taken during today's on-ice sessions. "Growth spurt," Otabek simply said, no further explanation necessary.
"Ah, that sucks."
"Yeah." Otabek sighed. "I'm supposed to compete in Ljubljana at the end of the month, but with the way things are going lately… I might need to stay a junior for another season."
"That's not so bad, is it? I'm thinking about sticking around for another season in juniors, too. Without a quad yet, it'll be tough for me to make much of a name for myself in the senior ranks, so there's really no rush at the moment to move up, you know?"
Maybe that made sense for Leo, but Otabek had a quad...or at least he used to. Though it hadn't been his most consistent jump, he'd been making fairly good progress until his stupid body decided to betray him. What if he never got it back? What if –
"Otabek?"
He shook his head. He was doing it again, letting his mind spiral downward into doubt... "Sorry, I'm not really in the mood to talk about skating right now."
"No, that's okay," Leo said sympathetically. "I get it, but if you ever do want to talk or, you know, just bitch about the unfairness of it all… Well, I'm here."
"Thanks." Otabek forced a small smile. Leo was a good friend; he really should make more of an effort to keep in touch.
"So, what else has happened since our last chat? Things still going well with your mystery guy?"
"Yeah." Thinking of JJ, Otabek's smile became more genuine. Despite all his troubles as of late, JJ remained his bright spot, the one thing that kept him from fully falling into the depths of despair. "He's great. Amazing."
Leo laughed. "Amazing, huh? That's pretty high praise, especially coming from you. You never called me amazing while we were dating."
"Oh. I –"
"I'm just teasing. I'm happy for you, really. Okay, maybe a little jealous, too, but mostly happy. So, what's so amazing about him?"
"Everything?"
"Come on, that's such a cop-out answer. I want details. Let me live vicariously!"
"Details?"
"Yeah! Like, I know you're keeping your relationship a secret for now, but do you at least get to go out on dates?" Leo asked. "How did you even meet, anyway? No offense, but you're not exactly the most sociable guy in the world. Is it an online thing, or did you –"
"No, we met here in Toronto, and, yeah, we've gone out together a few times. Actually…"
Was it safe to tell Leo about the club? Charlie's band was only known locally as far as Otabek was aware, but Leo had a real knack for discovering great new bands online, no matter how obscure. If JJ had ever mentioned Destination Unknown on his social media, Otabek wouldn't be surprised if Leo had looked up their website. And if he was smart enough to put two and two together...
"Actually, what?" Leo prodded when Otabek hadn't continued. "Don't leave me hanging! Did something happen?"
Otabek scratched the back of his neck. "Um, well…"
As long as he didn't mention the name of the band or the club, that would be fine, right?
"I actually got to see Nick Sanderson play again the other night," he finally revealed, deciding the risk of Leo uncovering JJ's identity was minimal as long as he kept things vague.
Leo's warm brown eyes widened. "What? No way, really?"
"Yes, really."
"Details! I demand details right now, Otabek Altin!"
"Okay, okay." Otabek held up his hands in mock surrender. "It happened last week. There's this club downtown that holds a Teen Night, so my boyfriend and I decided to sneak out after curfew to see one of his favorite local bands…"
Leo listened to the rest of Otabek's story completely enraptured, his eyes growing even bigger by the second. By the time Otabek got to the part about Nick's surprise appearance onstage to perform with the band, they were nearly bulging out of his head.
"No. Freaking. Way."
"I'm telling you, it's true," Otabek said. "I didn't manage to get any video" – something he regretted in hindsight – "but they played 'Nobody Knows' together, then afterward, we got to go backstage."
"You met the Nick Sanderson? Like, for real? You actually talked to him, and everything?"
"Yeah. It was...um, what's the word? Surreal? I thought I was dreaming at first."
"Dios mío!" Leo said. "Tell me you got his autograph."
"Um, yeah, let me get it." Otabek pushed back his chair and pulled open the second drawer down the side of his desk, taking out an old notebook filled with geometry problems. Nestled between the pages was the napkin Nick had autographed. One day, Otabek wanted to have it professionally framed, but for now, at least the notebook kept the napkin flat and relatively crease-free aside from the folds he had made while putting it in his pocket. "Here." He held the napkin in front of the web camera, careful to keep the club's tiny logo hidden from view. "Can you read it?"
On screen, Leo leaned forward, squinting his eyes. "It's a little blurry, but I can mostly make it out…" After he finished reading, he leaned back in his leather desk chair, hands on his head. "Okay, it's official. I hate you."
Knowing he was joking, Otabek chuckled and placed the napkin back in the notebook for safe-keeping. Too bad JJ was in all the photos he had taken with Nick; Leo would probably die of jealousy if he ever saw those. "Sorry, I should have asked him to write one for you, too. I was too much in shock to even think about it."
"Nah, don't worry about it. I'll live. Still, that's incredible! And your boyfriend is the one who set it all up?"
"Yeah. He's friends with the members of the band we went to see, and their lead singer happens to be – I mean, he happens to actually know Nick," he said, quickly covering up his near mistake. Zach was Nick's only cousin; that kind of information would probably be easy to discover online. Fortunately, Leo didn't say anything, probably assuming it was just a language mix-up on Otabek's part. "When my boyfriend heard from the band that Nick was coming to town for a couple of days, he suggested they ask Nick to join them on stage at their next gig and play my favorite song."
"Wow… I wish I had a guy who would do something like that for me," Leo said with a dreamy sigh. "It sounds like he has it bad, man."
Otabek frowned. "'Has it bad'?" He wasn't familiar with that particular turn of phrase, which he assumed was slang. "What do you mean?"
"Ah, sorry, that's a good thing, I promise! I just meant, it seems like he really loves you."
"Oh. You think?"
"Of course!" Leo furrowed his thick eyebrows. "You guys haven't said it?"
"Not yet," Otabek admitted, putting his notebook back in the drawer and closing it. "I mean, we've only been dating for a few weeks, so…"
"That's true. We never really got to that point either, did we?"
"No…" He'd thought about saying it a couple of times while they were dating, but it never seemed quite...right. As much as he had truly liked Leo and enjoyed being his boyfriend, looking back, those feelings paled in comparison to what he now felt for JJ.
Leo softly smiled. "But you're already in love with him, aren't you?"
Was it that obvious? "I, um…"
A knock on the door interrupted him.
"Sorry, that's probably JJ," Otabek said. "It's getting close to dinner, so I should let you go."
"Oh, I should probably scrounge up some supper too now that you mention it. Talk to you later?"
"Yeah. This time, I really will try to remember to call more often," Otabek promised. "Bye."
"Adios!" Leo said, giving a friendly wave.
After exiting out of Facetime and closing the lid on his laptop, Otabek walked over to answer the door. As suspected, it was JJ, who grinned as soon as the door swung open.
"Hey."
"Hey," Otabek echoed, unable to stop himself from smiling in return. "Is dinner ready?"
"Not yet." JJ entered the room, his arms immediately encircling around Otabek's waist once the door had safely closed behind him. "Papa says it'll probably be another twenty minutes or so. He got a late start."
"Oh?" Otabek's arms rose up to wrap around JJ's neck. "Any ideas about what we can do until then to pass the time?"
"Mmm, I can think of one or two," JJ murmured, his lips brushing against Otabek's in a teasing kiss, "but...there's something I want to ask you first."
"Yeah? What is it?"
Instead of answering, JJ took him by the hand and led him over to the bed. "Were you on a video call just now?" JJ asked, plopping down on the mattress and patting the spot beside him. "I thought I heard voices."
"Yeah, with Leo." Brow furrowed, Otabek joined him on the bed, sitting cross-legged while facing JJ. "I was telling him about the night we went to see Charlie's band. He's so jealous I got to meet Nick Sanderson and that my 'mystery' boyfriend set it all up as a special surprise, but...do you have a problem with me talking to Leo?" JJ hadn't mentioned anything about it before, despite knowing they were still friends.
"No, no, of course not," he said, waving his hands in front of his chest. "I know there's nothing going on between you and Leo. I was just wondering, that's all, but that's not what I wanted to talk about."
"Okay…" That was a relief, although it only made Otabek even more curious. "What is it, then?"
"Well, you know how my folks are planning to take some of their junior ice dancers to that competition in Mississauga this weekend?"
"Yeah." It wasn't a big competition, just a local club event, but they wanted to get some feedback from actual judges on their students' new dances before the season started in earnest so they could make any last minute changes that might be necessary.
"With Maman gone most of the weekend, that means practices will be on the lighter side. She's asked Mitchell to take over her lessons, but he usually just keeps an eye on everyone and lets us do whatever we want since he specializes in pairs, not singles."
"Makes sense, but what about it?" Otabek asked, not understanding what that had to do with anything.
"There's really no reason to go to our Saturday practices if Maman's not there, so I was thinking… Well, do you maybe want to go camping instead?"
Otabek blinked. "Camping?"
"Yeah, camping!" JJ said enthusiastically. "You enjoy camping, right?"
"I do...but how do you know that?" He didn't remember ever mentioning his love of camping to JJ.
He shrugged. "I read it the other day on your ISU bio. It said your hobbies were listening to music, camping, and photography." He tilted his head to the side. "By the way, why didn't you tell me you were into taking pictures? I'm a great model, you know."
"Modest as ever." Otabek affectionately rolled his eyes. "You never asked me," he said in response to JJ's question. "Besides, I prefer taking photos of landscapes. I don't photograph people very often."
"Well, there are plenty of great landscapes in the Canadian wilderness. Let me show you."
Otabek arched an eyebrow. "Have you even been camping before?" Somehow, JJ didn't strike him as a "sleeping underneath the stars" type of guy.
"Define 'camping'. Does it count if me and a couple of my buddies once slept in a tent in the backyard for a night when I was about ten or so?"
"Not really."
"Whatever." JJ gave a dismissive wave of his hand. "I think it would be fun. Don't you?"
"I do, but… JJ, your parents aren't going to allow us to go camping alone," he pointed out. "Remember what happened when we asked to go see Charlie's band? And that was only for a couple of hours past curfew."
JJ wasn't about to suggest sneaking out again, was he? Something like that worked for a night, when they would only be gone for a few hours while everyone else was asleep in their beds, but there was no way they could possibly sneak away for an entire weekend. Mississauga was only a half-hour drive from Toronto, so the Leroys wouldn't be spending the night.
"Don't worry about it. I've got a good idea how we might be able to convince them."
"What kind of idea?"
"Just trust me," JJ said. "If my parents give us permission, do you want to go?"
"I don't know..."
It wasn't that Otabek didn't want to. Of course he did. Camping with JJ sounded absolutely incredible, but he had never gone on a camping trip on his own before, much less in an unfamiliar country. He wasn't sure if he was ready to handle that kind of responsibility yet. What if one of them got injured? Or a bear ate all their food?
Beyond that, it probably wasn't the greatest idea to skip a day of practice, even if the Leroys were going out of town. JJ still had some time before his first competition of the season. He was set to make his senior debut at U.S. Classic, a Challenger event taking place in mid-September, but Otabek's first assignment was only a couple of weeks away, at JGP Ljubljana Cup in Slovenia. With his current growth spurt wrecking havoc with his jumps, he really needed all the practice and ice time he could get. It wasn't the time for a romantic weekend getaway.
JJ scooted over so that he was sitting next to Otabek on the bed, bringing his mouth close to Otabek's ear. "Think about it, Beks. It'll be just the two of us for an entire weekend," he said in a low voice that sent a pleasant shiver down Otabek's spine. "No one within miles. We'll have the freedom to do whatever we want, whenever we want…"
Slowly turning his face toward JJ's, Otabek inhaled a soft breath. Their mouths were almost touching, the citrus scent of JJ's favorite body spray filling his nostrils. "Whatever?"
"Uh-huh." JJ's hand came to rest on Otabek's inner thigh, slowly inching upward.
He swallowed hard, his heart rate increasing with every centimeter JJ's fingers moved closer toward the bulge that had begun to form inside his jeans. "Like what?"
"Like this…"
Their lips met as JJ gently pressed Otabek back against the stack of pillows behind him, situating himself in between Otabek's legs.
Underneath him, Otabek let out a soft moan as JJ began grinding his hips against his, his arousal growing even stronger. JJ wasn't too hard yet, but it didn't take long for that to change, evident even through the fabric of their jeans. One of Otabek's hands slid in between their writhing bodies, blindly searching for the zipper to JJ's fly. JJ gasped as his fingers made contact with the front of his jeans, but before Otabek could finish unhooking his top button, JJ pulled his hand away and sat back up on his knees.
Otabek stared up at him in mild confusion, his chest rising and falling in heavy pants. "JJ?"
"You first," he said, reaching for Otabek's own fly and tugging down the zipper. He then leaned back over Otabek, giving him another kiss on the lips before pushing up his T-shirt and moving downward, his mouth trailing down the slope of Otabek's neck and continuing even lower.
Realizing what he planned to do, Otabek closed his eyes as JJ's mouth made its way down the center of his chest. Anticipation built with every brush of JJ's soft lips on his bared skin, his own hand reaching for the top of JJ's dark head of hair, silently guiding him even lower...
So caught up in each other, they failed to hear when somebody opened the door.
"Dinner's rea– Hey, what are you guys doing?" Philippe asked as they hurriedly broke apart and sat back up, Otabek's heart pounding so fast he thought it would literally burst inside his chest.
Shit! he thought as he pulled down his T-shirt and grabbed a nearby pillow to cover himself. How much had Philippe seen? The way they were angled on the bed, Otabek doubted he could tell exactly what they had been doing, but how would they explain why JJ was on top of him, in between his legs? How much did he even know about sex? Philippe may have only been eight, but kids weren't always as naive as they seemed. Otabek definitely had some vague idea of what sex was by that age, even if he had been a bit clueless about the actual mechanics.
"Were you wrestling?" Philippe asked when they took too long to answer.
"Y-Yeah, we were just horsing around, goofing off," JJ said with a forced laugh. "As for you…" He got up and playfully pulled his little brother into a headlock. "How many times do we have to tell you not to barge into people's bedrooms without knocking, Pip-squeak?"
Philippe laughed as JJ rubbed the top of his head with his fist. "Sorry, sorry! I forgot!"
The two of them continued to banter as JJ led Philippe out of the room, giving Otabek a few moments to calm himself down. Thankfully, Philippe hadn't seemed too suspicious about what they had been doing. After zipping up his fly and smoothing down his mussed hair, he headed downstairs to the kitchen.
JJ and the rest of his family were already gathered around the table, laughing and piling food on their plates. Otabek quietly took his usual seat in the chair next to JJ and accepted the bowl of salad Nathalie handed to him, scooping some onto his plate.
"What's so funny?" Otabek asked after passing the bowl onto JJ, hoping his voice sounded more natural than it seemed in his head. "Did I miss something?"
"Oh, Pip was just telling us about something that happened to one of his friends at practice this afternoon," JJ said, wiping the tears from his eyes. "He and his partner were practicing the Dutch Waltz when his partner tripped on one of her edges. She tried to break the fall by grabbing onto his pants, but he'd forgotten to tie the drawstring, so of course his pants came rolling down with her and –" He started laughing again, unable to finish telling the story.
"Okay, that's enough for now, JJ," Nathalie said, despite having trouble hiding her own chuckles behind her hand. "As amusing as Pip's story is, it's not appropriate dinner conversation." She shot a look at her youngest child, a chastised Pip mumbling an apology, before turning her attention to Madeleine. "Madi, sweetie, why don't you lead us in the blessing tonight?"
The Leroys all bowed their heads and brought their hands together as Madeleine led them in reciting the usual mealtime prayer. As usual, Otabek sat in respectful silence, hands in his lap.
"So, hey, Beka and I were thinking about going camping this weekend," JJ casually announced once the blessing was completed and everybody began digging into the delicious meal of lemon chicken and sauteed green beans, one of Alain's specialties.
Otabek had yet to officially say "yes" to the idea, but after what had just happened, a weekend away without having to worry about one of JJ's younger siblings – or, worse, his parents – accidentally walking in on them again during an intimate moment sounded all the more enticing. Missing one day of practice wasn't that big a deal in the grand scheme of things; he would just have to train extra hard when they returned to the rink on Monday.
"Camping? Just the two of you?" Nathalie asked.
"Yeah, that was the plan."
At the other end of the table from her, Alain frowned. "I don't know about that, son. You don't know the first thing about camping."
"But Beka here is an experienced camper." JJ reached over and ruffled Otabek's hair, about as affectionate as he allowed himself to be toward him in front of his family. "He does it all the time. Tell them!"
Otabek swallowed the piece of chicken he had been eating and set down his fork. "Well, not all the time," he said, not wanting to give the Leroys a false impression of his level of expertise. "It's been a while since I last had the chance to go camping, but I do have some experience. My family often goes on camping trips whenever I visit back home." Thinking of his parents and little sister and all the fun they always had on those family excursions, an unexpected pang of homesickness came over Otabek. "I, um, really enjoy it."
To his surprise, Nathalie reached over and covered his hand with her own, lightly squeezing his fingers. "That sounds like a wonderful family tradition."
Otabek gave her a small, grateful smile. "It is."
"See? Beka knows what he's doing," JJ said. "It's not like we're both a couple of beginners, going off on our own."
"Going on trips with his family isn't the same as having the experience to lead a camping trip on his own, JJ," Alain pointed out, cutting off a piece of his chicken. "Have you even decided where you want to go? And what about gear? I doubt Otabek brought any camping equipment with him, and we don't own much that would be helpful, aside from some fishing polls, flashlights, and your old Superman sleeping bag that I'm sure you've long outgrown."
"I've been researching a few possible places we could go," JJ said, which was news to Otabek. Exactly how long had he been planning this trip? "I need to check which ones still have sites available this weekend, but I'm leaning toward Elora Gorge if possible. As for gear, you know Cast Wheels is always asking for content they can post on their social media. I'm sure if I ask, they wouldn't mind loaning us some equipment. It'll be good product placement."
"And I do have some things we can use, like a compass and a Swiss army knife," Otabek added. They had been handed down to him by his father, who in turn had received them from his own father, Otabek's late grandfather. The heirlooms were among his most prized possessions, so he always brought them along when he moved training facilities.
"What about practice?" Nathalie asked, her attention mostly focused on Otabek. "Your first competition is at the end of the month, and you're still having jump issues. I'm not sure it's such a great idea to miss a day."
"Come on, Maman, you're not even going to be here this weekend! How much is he really going to miss?"
Nathalie shot a look in JJ's direction. "I believe I was speaking to Otabek, JJ."
"I, um, I know I need to practice as much as I can, but I promise I'll work extra hard when we get back," Otabek assured her. "And JJ and I can still do most of our off-ice workouts while camping."
"I suppose that's true…" she admitted.
"So, if we promise to keep up with our exercises, can we go?" JJ asked. "Please?"
"Well…" Nathalie looked across the table at Alain, arching an eyebrow over her glasses. "Alain?"
Frowning, Alain sat back in his chair. "A weekend alone in the wilderness? I just don't know, boys. I really would feel better about this whole idea if you at least had some kind of adult supervision. I would offer to take you myself if we weren't already tied up with this competition in Mississauga. Perhaps some other weekend…"
"But the season is about to begin, Papa!" JJ protested. "You know how busy you and Maman get around this time. It'll be months until we all have a free weekend again. So, how about this? What if Cami went with us?"
Otabek jerked his head to the side. What the hell was JJ thinking? Was this the "plan" he had mentioned earlier? But the entire point of the trip was to have some uninterrupted alone time, not to spend it with JJ's cousin, as much as he liked her.
"Camille?"
"Yeah! She's an adult, and she used to be a Girl Guide when she was younger, so she also has some camping experience," JJ said. "She'd make the perfect chaperone."
"Except we've already asked her to babysit Madi and Pip while we're gone," Nathalie reminded him.
"Couldn't they just go with you instead? You brought me along to competitions all the time when I was younger, and you're always saying how useful it is to watch other skaters compete. I'm sure they could learn a lot by watching the competition."
"Oh, yes, can we?" Madeleine asked, her eyes lighting up. "Please, Maman? Papa?" She folded her hands together, giving her parents puppy-dog eyes. "I really want to see everybody dance in their new costumes!"
"Aw, but Cami promised she would take us to – Ow!" Philippe winced. Though Otabek couldn't see, he would bet good money Madeleine had kicked his leg underneath the table. "I mean, yeah, that would be fun," he said, changing his tune, although he sounded far less enthused than his sister. Among the Leroy siblings, Philippe was the least serious about figure skating. It wouldn't surprise Otabek in the least if one day in the future he decided to switch to hockey or speed skating instead.
Nathalie gave her daughter a sharp look. "No hitting your brother, Madeleine Thérèse," she scolded. "You know better than that."
"Sorry," Madeleine mumbled, poking a cherry tomato with her fork. "But can we please go? Pretty please? I promise we'll be on our best behavior."
Alain sighed. "JJ, call Camille after dinner and ask if she'd be willing to go camping with you two. If she says yes, and Otabek's parents also give him their permission...then, fine, I guess you can go."
"You mean it?" JJ asked, eyes widening. "We can really go?"
"That's what I said. Just be careful out there and follow Camille's lead, okay? The last thing we need is for either of you to get injured right before the season starts."
"We will. Thanks, Papa!"
After helping to clear the table and load the dishwasher, JJ and Otabek went straight up to JJ's room to start planning their trip. The weekend was fast approaching, so if they wanted to secure a reservation and be prepared in time, they needed to make some decisions quick.
"Oh, my God, I still can't believe they actually said yes!" JJ said, locking the door behind him.
"Only if Camille goes with us, though," Otabek reminded him, frowning as he plopped down on JJ's bed. "Don't get me wrong, I really like your cousin, but going camping with a chaperone kind of defeats the purpose, doesn't it? Maybe we should just forget about the whole thing…" It was probably better for him to focus on practice, anyway.
"And break poor Madi's heart? We can't do that! You saw how much she wants to watch the dancers compete this weekend. Besides, this is all just part of my brilliant plan."
JJ pulled out his cell phone and started scrolling through his contacts.
"What do you mean?"
"Just wait and see…" He brought the phone to his ear, a couple of seconds passing before someone picked up the call. "Yeah, Cami? It's me. Are you busy at the moment? I need to ask you a huge, huge favor," he said, motioning for Otabek to scoot over so that he could join him on the bed. "Great! Hang on, I'm gonna put you on speaker. Beka's with me."
As Otabek sat back up, JJ tapped the Speaker icon on his screen and set the phone between them on the blanket so they could both talk and hear.
"Hey, Camille," Otabek said when JJ mouthed for him to say something. "How are you?"
"Oh, hi, Otabek. I'm good, how are you? What's going on?"
"The thing is, Beka and I want to go on a camping trip this weekend, but my folks won't allow it unless we have a responsible adult come along with us as a chaperone," JJ said, getting straight to the point. "I know it's kinda last minute, but would you be willing to be that adult?"
"This weekend?" she repeated. "But I'm supposed to –"
"Already taken care of. My parents said they'll take Madi and Pip with them to Mississauga if you agree."
"Oh, okay. But camping? I don't know, guys… I went a couple of times when I was younger with my Girl Guide troop, but it's not really my thing, to be honest. All the bugs and the dirt and the –"
"Don't worry! You don't actually have to go camping," JJ said. "As long as Maman and Papa think you're with us, that'll be good enough."
There was a long pause on the other end of the line.
"JJ."
Though they were not related by blood, Camillle's voice sounded remarkably like Nathalie's at that moment, stern and no nonsense.
JJ instinctively sat up straighter. "Yes?"
"I'm not going to lie to Tata Nathalie and Tonton Alain so you and your secret boyfriend can go hook up in the Canadian wilderness! Are you out of your freaking mind?"
Wincing at her shrill tone, JJ grabbed the phone and started pacing around the room. "H-Hook up? No, no, you've got it all wrong. Our plans are totally pure and wholesome, I promise! Beka's an amateur photographer and likes to take landscape pictures, so –"
"I wasn't born yesterday," she interrupted. "You and Otabek are having sex, aren't you? Wait, on second thought, don't answer that. Plausible deniability."
Otabek grabbed the back of JJ's T-shirt as he passed by the bed once again, lowering his voice so that Camille hopefully wouldn't overhear. "JJ, let's just forget about the whole camping thing. It's not a big deal. There are lots of other places we can go to take pic–"
"No, I want to take you camping, Beks," he insisted in an equally hushed voice, turning around and covering the speakers at the bottom of his phone with his hand. "It's important to me."
"I want to go, too, but if she's too uncomfortable with the idea –"
"JJ? Otabek? Are you still there?" Camille asked, her voice muffled.
"Um, yeah." JJ unblocked the speakers and held the phone up to his face. "Look, I know this is a big ask," he said in a far less flippant tone than he had used before. "You've already done so much in agreeing not to tell anyone about us, and I'm so, so incredibly thankful for that, more than I can say, but Beka and I… We just want a couple of days to ourselves without constantly having to hide how we feel about each other. Is that so wrong?"
"No, of course not." She let out a heavy sigh. "It's not like I don't understand. I'd like to help, really I would, but your parents trust me a lot. If they found out –"
"Please, Camille." Otabek stood up beside JJ, moving his arm to pull the phone closer to him. "I know you hate the idea of lying to your aunt and uncle. I hate it, too, but it would mean the world to us."
"I...don't know."
"You really don't have to worry about us," JJ assured her. "Beka's gone camping tons of times before with his family, so he has plenty of experience. We'll be fine on our own. All you need to do is pretend to come with us when we leave. You and Chris could even make a romantic getaway out of it for yourselves, stay at a nearby hotel while we head to the campsite? That way you'll at least be nearby if there's any trouble."
"A weekend holed up in a nice hotel room does sound pretty tempting…" Camille admitted.
"So you'll do it?"
"Okay, okay, fine, I'll cover for you," she finally agreed, JJ shaking his free fist in victory. "Just promise me you'll be...safe."
"Absolutely, of course. Thank you, thank you, thank you! I really owe you one."
"I'm holding you to that. Now, how exactly do you plan to pull this whole thing off?"
"Hold on a sec. Let me check and make sure we can get a reservation first." JJ took a seat at his desk and booted up his laptop, pulling up the website to the campground at Elora Gorge. "This is the place I was thinking we could stay at," he told Otabek. "It's only an hour and a half drive from Toronto, so not too far away, and it looks like we're in luck! They still have a few sites open for reservations this weekend. What do you think?"
Coming up behind him, Otabek rested his hands on JJ's broad shoulders as he looked over the campground's information. The website provided plenty of pictures of the area, showing off the natural beauty of the Grand River valley. "Yeah, it looks good," he said, growing more and more excited the more he saw. "Let's book it."
"Booking...and done!" JJ said, filling out the online form in record time. He then reached again for his cell phone. "Okay, we're all set, Cami. We'll be camping at Elora Gorge, arriving late Friday afternoon and leaving Sunday morning. I'm thinking we'll probably leave straight from the rink, so you can meet us there after practice and do your thing with my parents – you know, reassure them and all that jazz. Then afterwards, we can run by your place to pick up Chris and drop you two off along the way."
"Okay, sounds doable. I'll look around for hotels in the area and make a reservation, too," Camille said.
"Thanks again for agreeing to do this. Beka and I really, really appreciate it."
"Yes, thank you, Camille," Otabek said. "You have our eternal gratitude."
"'Eternal gratitude,' huh?" She chuckled. "I'll have to remember that for the future. Seriously, though, I know how tough it must be for you guys to get any real privacy. Growing up with seven brothers and sisters, believe me, I know the struggle, so I'm happy to help. Anyway, I'll see you guys Friday, so until then, bye!"
"Bye!" they chorused before JJ ended the call.
"Oh, my God, I can't believe we're really doing this," JJ said, setting his phone down beside his laptop and spinning his chair around to face Otabek. "Can you?"
Otabek shook his head. Admittedly, he had his doubts when JJ first brought up the idea, but against all odds, it actually seemed like they would be able to pull it off. "An entire weekend, all to ourselves… It's like a dream come true."
"It does, and I know exactly the first thing I want to do when we get there."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." Grinning up at Otabek, JJ reached for his hands and pulled him onto his lap. "Care for a special sneak peak?"
"You know I do...but, wait." Otabek looked back over his shoulder at the door. "Are you sure the door is locked?" The last thing they needed was for Philippe to come busting in again uninvited.
"Yeah, don't worry, we're safe. You saw me lock it when we came in."
He had, but still… "Let me check one more time."
Otabek climbed off JJ's lap and padded over to the door. Maybe he was being paranoid, but with the stakes so high, it couldn't hurt to double-check, just in case. He twisted the knob with his hand, relieved to feel the resistance that indicated the door was indeed locked.
"See, I told you," JJ said, coming up behind Otabek and pinning him up against the door when he turned back around. "Ready for that preview, now?"
Grinning, Otabek reached up and wrapped his arms around JJ's neck. "Absolutely..."
DISCLAIMER: "Yuri! On Ice" doesn't belong to me.
AUTHOR'S NOTES: I hope you enjoyed the chapter! Chapter 11 should be posted in early January. Feel free to follow me on Tumblr; my username is kaleidodreams.
Ittin balasy is Kazakh for "son of a bitch".
Fun fact, I gave real-life Canadian figure skater Nam Nguyen's junior results during the 2013-2014 season to JJ. Nam also placed 4th at JGP Mexico and 16th at JGP Poland, not qualifying for the JGP Finals before coming back strong to win Junior Worlds a few months later over none other than bronze medalist (and future Olympic gold medalist) Nathan Chen!