Lion King:Ripples in the Pond

by Mithos of the blue sky and sea

Dedicated to James Earl Jones, rest well great king. this Lion King AU fic explores the younger years of the Lion who would be Scar and his brother Mufasa, however time is like a river abd when you throw a pebble in it causes ripples, will these ripples help bridge the gap between Mufasa abd his little brother or create greater chaos?

33. Special 1:Curse of Leona Kingscholar

Special 1: Curse of Leona Kingscholar

The sun had barely risen, casting golden light across the Pride Lands, when an unusual sight caught Zumaridi's ever-vigilant eyes. She stood motionless, her emerald-green gaze locked onto a particular spot in the distance. The bespectacled lioness adjusted her glasses for the third time, her tail flicking with nervous curiosity.

A rock. A very large, very suspicious rock.

The rest of the group—Taka, Zira, Jabari, Kongo, Asani, and the others—slowly gathered around, watching in growing confusion as Zumaridi continued her intense, unblinking stare at the object.

Jabari, ever the practical one, sighed. "Zumaridi… it's just a rock."

"No," she whispered dramatically, her tone making it sound as though she had uncovered the deepest, most sinister mystery in the world. "It wasn't there yesterday."

Everyone exchanged glances.

Kongo tilted his head. "Rocks move. Maybe it fell from somewhere?"

Zumaridi finally turned to face them, her expression eerily serious. "Then tell me why it has a shiny piece on it. And why… it's humming."

Silence.

The group slowly turned their attention to the supposed rock, and indeed, a faint but steady hummmmm could be heard from it. A single, oddly metallic-looking piece gleamed in the morning light.

Taka, always eager to take charge (and make a spectacle of himself), strutted forward with the regal air of a king about to slay a dragon. "Step aside, lesser lions! I, the brilliant and fearless Prince Taka, shall solve this mystery!"

Zira let out a dreamy sigh, practically melting at his confidence. "Oh, Taka, you're so bold and strong!" She batted her eyelashes dramatically. "Please, be careful! If anything were to happen to you, I'd simply perish!"

Kongo rolled his eyes. "It's a rock, not a crocodile."

Meanwhile, Taka dramatically placed a paw on the rock and cleared his throat. "Reveal your secrets, mysterious relic of the Pale Ones!"

Nothing happened.

Taka scowled. "I said… reveal your secrets!" He pushed against it, expecting some magical reaction.

Instead, the metallic part wobbled slightly. And then—

CLICK.

Everyone froze.

The humming grew louder. The ground trembled slightly beneath their paws.

Asani took an instinctive step back. "Uh… Taka? What did you do?"

"I activated it, obviously," Taka said, trying to sound nonchalant despite the nervous flick of his tail. "Because I am a genius."

Then the rock moved.

Or rather, it opened.

A section of the stone lifted like a lid, revealing an interior full of Pale One objects—strange, crinkly bags, bizarrely shaped sticks, and something round and bouncy with faded black-and-white patches. A gust of stale air whooshed out.

Zumaridi gasped. "It's a Pale One treasure hoard!"

Jabari blinked. "Or… a forgotten pile of their junk?"

"Treasure," Zumaridi insisted.

Taka, ever the dramatic, stepped forward with his head high. "Behold! Proof that the Pale Ones revered this land! And now, by divine right, I claim their lost treasures in the name of—"

A loud BZZZZT rang out as something sparked inside the pile.

Taka leapt backward with an undignified yelp, nearly tripping over Zira, who caught him in an overly theatrical swoon. "Oh, my love, let me save you!"

Kongo burst out laughing. "So much for fearless."

Taka scowled, straightening himself. "That was merely a test. To ensure the safety of my subjects."

Jabari smirked. "Right. Very noble of you."

Asani sniffed at one of the crinkly bags, ears flicking in confusion. "What… is this?"

Zumaridi pushed her glasses up. "It says 'Chips.'"

Kongo wrinkled his nose. "Looks like dried leaves."

Zira, eager to impress Taka, grabbed the bag and tore it open with her claws. The scent of artificial cheese filled the air. She cautiously licked one of the orange-dusted objects before her eyes widened. "It's delicious!"

Taka, ever the opportunist, snatched the bag and inspected the contents. "Very well. I, Prince Taka, shall be the judge of this divine offering." He tossed a handful into his mouth—then gasped, eyes widening. "By the Great Kings… these are incredible!"

What followed was an absolutely undignified scrabble as the group lunged for the mysterious Pale One food, each trying to grab a share of the delicious "chips."

Zumaridi, however, had moved on, staring into the depths of the pile. Her sharp eyes locked onto something even stranger. "Wait. There's more."

She reached in and pulled out a rectangle—one with a small screen and strange symbols on it. The group gathered around, eyes wide with curiosity.

Jabari sniffed it. "What is that?"

Zumaridi tilted her head, adjusting her glasses. "I… don't know."

Taka smirked. "Obviously, it is a magical relic meant for communication with the spirits of the Pale Ones!" He lifted it high, posing like a victorious warlord.

BEEP.

The rectangle lit up.

Everyone SCREAMED.

Zira immediately clung to Taka. "Oh, my king, it's cursed! Protect me!"

Kongo, meanwhile, took one look at the glowing screen and bolted. "Nope. Nope. Nope. Not dealing with that!"

Jabari was laughing so hard he could barely breathe. "You—you guys are afraid of a glowing rock?!"

Zumaridi, still staring, muttered, "I must study this."

Asani, holding up a different object—a strange, rubbery tube with a cap—pointed at it. "What do you think this is?"

Zira, still clinging to Taka, tilted her head. "I don't know, but it smells nice."

Before anyone could stop him, Kongo grabbed it and squeezed. A blob of white foam shot out, splattering across Taka's face.

Silence.

Taka blinked, his once-pristine fur now covered in strange-smelling white paste.

Kongo collapsed laughing. Jabari followed.

Zira gasped. "My love! You've been hexed!"

Taka, ever the dignified prince, wiped his face with a scowl. "You will pay for this, Kongo."

Kongo, through tears of laughter, simply grinned. "Totally worth it."

Zumaridi, still fascinated by the glowing rectangle, muttered, "This… this is the greatest discovery of our time."

As the sun continued to rise, the lions of the Pride Lands found themselves in the middle of the strangest day in their history—one filled with odd relics, inexplicable magic, and the undeniable truth that Pale Ones left behind some very weird stuff.

And somewhere, the spirits of the Great Kings were probably watching.

Laughing.

The return to the Lion Guard Lair was nothing short of triumphant. Taka led the way, strutting like he had just conquered an entire kingdom, while Kondo carried the fake rock on his back, grumbling about how heavy it was. Zumaridi trotted alongside them, eyes locked onto the strange black rectangle in her paw, glasses slipping down her nose as she muttered observations to herself.

Jabari, however, kept glancing over his shoulder, ears pinned back and tail twitching. The sight of Pale One artifacts made his stomach churn with old memories. He had been in their grasp once—trapped behind cold bars, poked and prodded by their strange appendages. He shuddered. This was not a treasure. It was a warning.

Inside the lair, the group gathered around their "discovery," placing the fake rock in the center as if it were a sacred relic.

Taka puffed out his chest. "Brothers and sisters! We stand before the greatest find in the history of the Pride Lands! A true gift from the legendary Pale Ones!"

Mufasa, who had been lounging nearby, lifted his head with a bemused look. "A gift?" He eyed the odd collection of items skeptically. "It just looks like a bunch of weird junk."

Taka scoffed. "Junk? Brother, do you not see the power contained within these relics?" He gestured grandly toward the fake rock. "This is proof of the Pale Ones' wisdom! They have left behind their knowledge for us to inherit!"

Mufasa blinked. "So… a magic rock?"

"Yes! A rock of great importance! And within it—" Taka dramatically kicked open the lid, revealing the bizarre contents inside. "—a hoard of Pale One artifacts!"

Kondo ignored the speech entirely, digging around inside until he pulled out another bag of "chips." He tore it open with his teeth and immediately started munching, tail wagging. "Best treasure ever."

Meanwhile, Asani had wandered off to inspect his own discovery—a small, white bottle with strange symbols on it. "Pale Ones must be super fast if they need this stuff to go even faster." Shrugging, he licked up a few of the tiny pellets inside.

Within seconds, his eyes dilated.

"Guys," he whispered.

Then he vanished.

The others barely had time to process what happened before Asani blurred past them, knocking over Kondo's chips, bouncing off the walls, and screaming in excitement.

"OH WOW, EVERYTHING IS SO BRIGHT—DO YOU GUYS EVER NOTICE HOW WEIRD OUR PAWS LOOK—IS THIS WHAT THE PALE ONES FEEL LIKE ALL THE TIME—OH MY STARS I CAN SEE SOUND—"

Mufasa just watched him go with an arched brow. "...What did he eat?"

Zumaridi adjusted her glasses. "Unknown substance. Possibly infused with Pale One speed magic. Fascinating."

Meanwhile, Jabari was slowly backing away from the whole thing. His fur stood on end as he stared at the artifacts like they might attack him. "I don't like this. This is Pale One stuff. We shouldn't be messing with it."

Taka smirked. "Afraid of a few trinkets, Jabari?" He picked up a roll of duct tape and examined it like it was a sacred relic. "What do you think this does?"

Jabari didn't answer. His breathing had quickened, memories of the past clawing at his mind. The cold of the cage. The way they had stared at him with those strange, round eyes. The noise. The artificial smells.

"I was in one of their cages," he finally muttered. "I know what they're capable of."

For once, Taka's smug expression faded.

Zira, usually preoccupied with fawning over Taka, turned toward Jabari with genuine curiosity. "You never talk about that."

Jabari swallowed hard. "Because I don't want to."

Zumaridi, still fascinated by the strange black rectangle (smartphone), tapped it with a claw. "Perhaps this holds answers."

BEEP.

A sudden bright light flashed across the screen, causing everyone to recoil.

Jabari screamed.

Taka yelped and leapt behind Zira. "The relic lives!"

Zira, ever the devoted follower, clung to him. "Oh, my king, it's angry!"

Kondo blinked. "...Can I eat it?"

Zumaridi, unfazed, pushed her glasses up and continued tapping at the screen. The device responded, shifting images in front of her. "This is remarkable. A Pale One communication stone."

Jabari, still recovering, hissed. "Put it back! Destroy it!"

Mufasa sighed. "It's just a shiny rock that makes noise."

Taka whirled on him. "How can you be so blind to the wonders before us, brother?! These relics could change everything!" He gestured wildly toward the hoard. "Think of what we could learn!"

Mufasa just rolled his eyes. "Or maybe you're just playing with Pale One garbage."

As if to emphasize his point, Asani zoomed by at lightning speed, still caught in his caffeine-induced high.

"OH WOW THE SKY LOOKS EXTRA BLUE TODAY—DO YOU THINK WE COULD DIG TO THE CENTER OF THE EARTH—DO PALE ONES LIVE UNDERGROUND—WHAT IF THEY'RE WATCHING US RIGHT NOW?!"

Taka, recovering his composure, cleared his throat. "Clearly, Asani is experiencing the power of the Pale Ones. Another gift from them."

Mufasa sighed. "This is the dumbest thing I've ever seen."

Zumaridi ignored them all, still studying the glowing rectangle. "I must unlock its secrets."

Jabari just sat in the corner, muttering to himself about cursed artifacts.

Meanwhile, Kondo found yet another bag of chips and happily continued munching.

And Asani, still vibrating at the speed of light, climbed a tree and declared himself King of the Wind.

The Pale Ones, wherever they were, probably had no idea their lost supplies had sparked an entire legend among the lions of the Pride Lands.

And the Great Kings of the Past?

They were definitely laughing.

Zira's eyes were locked onto the glowing rectangle, her ears twitching, her heart racing. Her normally sharp and composed mind was… compromised. The moment she had booted up the strange Pale One game, she had been introduced to him.

Leona Kingscholar.

A Pale One—yet not quite. A glorious mix of familiar and exotic. His dark mane, his piercing green eyes, the smug yet regal way he carried himself… He reminded her of Taka, but somehow even better.

And then he spoke.

"Women do so much work, and yet they receive so little respect. I, however, understand their value. They deserve to be heard, to be acknowledged."

Zira's breath hitched. Her tail curled.

This was a Pale One?!

A studly Pale One?

Taka—who she had adored, worshipped, and devoted her entire being to—was a magnificent lion, of course. But this Leona was like an elevated version of him. A rare, divine creature sculpted by some unknown force, a purrfect fusion of power and grace.

Jabari, watching Zira's absolute infatuation with the strange moving images, narrowed his eyes. "Zira, you've been bewitched."

Zira didn't even look up. "Silence, Jabari."

Jabari growled. "I knew these Pale One relics were cursed! First Asani starts running faster than a cheetah, now this thing has stolen your soul!"

Zumaridi, adjusting her glasses, peered over Zira's shoulder. She gave an approving nod. "He is indeed quite the beefcake."

Zira shot her a glare. "He is more than that! He is—" she dramatically clutched her chest, eyes full of longing, "—a king among Pale Ones!"

Jabari's eye twitched. "Zira, he's not real."

Zira hissed, clutching the glowing rectangle protectively. "You are not real! You don't understand!"

Jabari threw up his paws. "You've lost it."

Meanwhile, Taka had been listening with increasing irritation. He finally stepped forward, flicking his tail. "What is this nonsense about some Pale One being greater than me?"

Zira immediately turned to him, scrutinizing him with sharp, assessing eyes. "Taka…"

Taka arched a brow. "Yes?"

Zira suddenly lunged, grabbing his mane.

"Hey—Zira!" Taka yelped as Zira started aggressively braiding his hair, trying to mimic Leona's signature look.

"You must match him! You are already halfway there! We will make you even better!"

Mufasa, who had been watching this entire debacle with an exhausted expression, finally spoke up. "Are you really letting a Pale One steal your greatest admirer, Taka?"

Taka struggled against Zira's grip, growling. "I will not be replaced by some fictional hairless lion!"

"Then sit still!" Zira ordered, tugging his mane tighter.

—

Meanwhile, in a less chaotic corner of the lair…

Kondo had found his sisters, Kuki and Biskuti, and was proudly showing them a new Pale One discovery—a bag of cookies and a box of pocky sticks.

"Look at these!" Kondo said with a wide grin, dropping the treats in front of them. "The Pale Ones must be great hunters to have made such delicacies!"

Kuki gasped. "Are these… treasures?"

Biskuti clapped her paws. "Big brother, you always find the best things!"

The cubs eagerly dug into the treats, giggling and fawning over their older brother as he basked in their admiration. It was clear they had massive big-brother complexes, cheering him on with almost comical enthusiasm.

Kondo, pleased, ruffled their ears. "Of course! Your big brother is the strongest, after all!"

—

Elsewhere, still hopped up on Pep Pills…

Asani was a blur. He was leaping across rocks, skidding down slopes, and literally running on water at one point. His mate, Sarafina, was desperately trying to catch him.

"Asani, you mad lion, GET BACK HERE!"

"I CAN'T! I'M ONE WITH THE WIND! I AM SPEED! I AM—"

He tripped over a rock.

Sarafina pounced, pinning him down. "You are done."

"But—"

"No. No more Pale One magic."

Asani pouted.

—

Back in the lair…

Taka finally managed to yank himself free from Zira's enthusiastic mane-braiding, his fur an absolute mess.

"That's enough, Zira!" he roared. "I am Taka! I don't need to look like some… some Pale One impostor!"

Zira sighed, clutching her magic rectangle. "You will never understand, Taka…" She turned back to the glowing screen, hearts practically floating around her. "Leona respects women…"

Mufasa burst out laughing. "That definitely isn't Taka, then."

Taka snarled. "Enough!"

Zumaridi, still watching from the side, just shrugged. "If you think about it… this is one of the funnier curses I've seen."

Jabari just groaned, rubbing his temples.

This entire day had been a disaster.

Taka, still fuming and trying to unbraid his mane, paced back and forth. "Enough of this Pale One nonsense! I will not have my greatest admirer distracted by some ridiculous magic rectangle!"

Zira barely heard him. She was enraptured, gazing at Leona Kingscholar's smug expression on the glowing screen. "He's so arrogant, so powerful, so so regal!"

Taka twitched. That was supposed to be ME.

Mufasa, wiping tears of laughter from his eyes, nudged his younger brother. "Looks like you have some competition, Taka."

Taka growled. "I am not competing with a fictional Pale One!"

Zumaridi, still analyzing the smartphone, muttered, "But he is very symmetrical. Good facial structure. Strong jawline."

Taka snapped his head toward her. "You too?!"

Zumaridi simply adjusted her glasses and shrugged.

Meanwhile, Jabari was still convinced Zira had been cursed.

"We have to break the spell," he insisted, pacing wildly. "This Pale One magic is too strong! She's not even looking at Taka anymore!"

Zira, not even glancing up, said dreamily, "Leona values my input."

Jabari gasped. "It's worse than I thought!"

Taka, now determined to reclaim his rightful place as Zira's one and only obsession, stomped over to the fake rock where Zumaridi had been sifting through the "Pale One treasures."

"There has to be something in here that will impress her more than this Leona!"

—

While Taka was on a mission to reclaim his title as Supreme Object of Zira's Affections, Kondo was facing an entirely different crisis.

The cookies were gone.

Kuki and Biskuti, who had been happily munching on Pale One snacks, looked up at their big brother in horror. "Kondo! They disappeared!"

Kondo gasped, his muscles tensing. "WHAT?! Who would DARE steal the Pale One treasures!?"

The answer came in the form of a blur of golden fur and caffeine-fueled madness.

"Asani."

The lion in question was still vibrating at an unnatural speed. He had devoured every last cookie, every last pocky stick, and now… his pupils were so dilated, they looked like black holes.

"I CAN SEE THE FABRIC OF REALITY," he declared.

Sarafina, panting as she caught up to him, tackled him again. "FOR THE LAST TIME—STOP MOVING."

"I HAVE TO KEEP GOING," Asani panted, squirming. "I CAN HEAR COLORS."

Sarafina, still pinning him down, sighed. "Taka is going to kill you."

"HE'LL HAVE TO CATCH ME FIRST."

—

Taka had just about had it.

He rummaged through the Pale One relics with increasing frustration. What was all of this nonsense?!

Zumaridi was still staring at the smartphone, muttering to herself. "How does this tiny rock store so much knowledge? The Pale Ones must have brains the size of elephants."

Jabari was drawing battle plans to "free" Zira from her "curse."

Kondo was mourning his lost snacks.

And Zira? She was sitting, smiling softly at the glowing rectangle, blushing.

Taka snapped.

"ENOUGH!" he roared, slamming his paw onto the fake rock's surface.

The smartphone suddenly switched apps.

Zira's eyes widened. "NOOOO, YOU'VE ERASED HIM FROM EXISTENCE!"

But instead of Twisted Wonderland, a different image appeared.

A video.

It was of a Pale One. A real one. A documentarian.

Zumaridi's eyes narrowed as the video played. "Fascinating… The Pale One is… talking."

Everyone crowded around, eyes wide.

The screen flickered, and the Pale One—a tall, thin creature wearing strange coverings—spoke in a deep, thoughtful tone:

"Day 43. The lions continue to exhibit fascinating behaviors. I have placed another observational camera in a camouflaged rock to further document their social interactions. I suspect they are intelligent enough to recognize its presence. It is only a matter of time before they interact with it."

Silence.

Then, very slowly, every lion turned their heads toward Zumaridi.

Zumaridi adjusted her glasses. "I knew that rock was suspicious."

Jabari? He lost it.

"THE PALE ONES ARE WATCHING US."

Taka paled. "They—what?"

Jabari grabbed his head. "IT'S NOT JUST THEIR TREASURES—THEY'RE STUDYING US!"

Kondo gasped. "Like how we study beetles!?"

Kuki and Biskuti clutched each other. "What if they're planning to steal us?!"

Asani, still vibrating, suddenly froze. His pupils shrank. His entire caffeinated world shattered.

"…This is how it begins."

Sarafina sighed. "Oh great, now he's having an existential crisis."

Taka, shaking his head violently, refused to accept this. "No. NO! We are lions! We are at the top of the food chain! The Pale Ones cannot possibly—"

The smartphone screen flickered again.

"Day 44. I am certain now. The lions are aware of my presence. I must proceed with caution."

Jabari screamed.

Taka's arrogance shattered like a gazelle's femur.

Zira?

She only had one thing to say.

"…Does this mean Leona Kingscholar is real?"

Taka let out a primal scream of frustration.

Taka had faced many trials in his life.

His arrogant older brother.

His mother's impossibly high expectations.

His slow-burning existential crisis over whether or not he was a bad person.

But this?

This was too much.

The Pale Ones were studying them.

And worse… Zira was still simping over that ridiculous "Leona Kingscholar."

Jabari was on the verge of a nervous breakdown. "We have to hide! We have to move! We have to destroy all the Pale One artifacts before it's too late!"

Taka, still reeling, pointed an accusing paw at Zumaridi. "You're the one who found the cursed rock! You brought this doom upon us!"

Zumaridi blinked. "It was humming. And it had a shiny bit."

"That does not justify it!"

Zira, still clutching the smartphone, let out a relieved sigh. "Well, if the Pale Ones are watching, that must mean Leona is real somewhere." She gazed at the screen wistfully. "Maybe… maybe he's watching me right now."

Taka's soul left his body.

Mufasa, laughing himself sick, patted his brother's shoulder. "I don't know, Taka, I think he might be a better king than you."

"I WILL KILL YOU."

—

Meanwhile, The Great Caffeine Crash

Asani's existential crisis was in full effect.

The caffeine-fueled god of speed had now become the caffeine-deprived god of despair.

His eyes were bloodshot. His tail twitched sporadically. His mate, Sarafina, had finally caught him—but now she was deeply regretting it.

"I can feel time passing," Asani muttered darkly. "I can feel every second. It's agonizing."

Sarafina rubbed her temples. "I told you not to eat those weird Pale One beans."

"They gave me the gift of speed. And then they took it away." His eyes narrowed. "Like a cruel and vengeful god."

Kondo, still mourning his snacks, tilted his head. "Wait… so Pale Ones are faster than you?"

Silence.

A deep, horrifying realization settled over Asani. His entire identity was built on being the fastest.

And the Pale Ones had made beans that were faster than him.

Asani curled into a ball. "I am nothing."

Sarafina sighed. "For the love of—will someone please slap him?"

Kuki, the ever-enthusiastic cub, happily obliged.

SMACK.

Asani blinked. "Huh. I needed that."

Sarafina sighed in relief. "Thank the stars."

Then Asani frowned again. "Wait… but what if Pale Ones have even stronger beans?"

Sarafina let out a long, suffering groan.

—

The Situation Deteriorates Further

Taka had officially hit his breaking point.

He pointed a dramatic paw at Zira, who was still staring at the magic rectangle.

"I refuse to be replaced by some fictional Pale One prince!"

Zira, not looking up, said, "Leona respects women."

Taka gasped in absolute betrayal. "I RESPECT YOU—"

"No, you command me," Zira corrected, eyes still glued to the screen. "Leona values my opinion."

Taka's jaw dropped. "I—"

Mufasa, snickering, patted his brother's back. "You might want to start taking notes."

Taka hissed.

Jabari, still hyperventilating, was trying to devise ways to "defend" the Pride Lands from Pale One interference.

"We need to cover ourselves in mud!" he declared. "It will mask our body heat!"

Kondo blinked. "Do Pale Ones eat us?"

Jabari shuddered. "I DON'T KNOW WHAT THEY WANT, BUT I REFUSE TO BE A SCIENCE EXPERIMENT."

Zumaridi, as usual, was the only calm one. She adjusted her glasses. "If they were planning to attack, they would have done so already."

"Unless," Kuki whispered dramatically, "they're waiting for us to let our guard down."

Biskuti gasped. "Like we do when hunting gazelles?"

Kondo freaked out. "WE'RE THE GAZELLES IN THIS SCENARIO?!"

Chaos erupted.

Jabari was preparing a mud camouflage plan.

Kondo was on the verge of a full-blown identity crisis.

Asani was plotting how to obtain stronger Pale One beans.

Zira was still simping.

Mufasa was having the time of his life watching his little brother absolutely lose his mind.

And Taka?

Taka was plotting.

He was not about to let some fictional Pale One prince steal his most loyal follower.

With a deep breath, he flipped his mane dramatically and turned to Zira.

"…Zira."

Zira, still holding the smartphone, glanced up. "Hmm?"

Taka smirked. "I challenge this Leona Kingscholar to a duel."

Silence.

Mufasa nearly fell over laughing.

Zumaridi sighed. "Taka. He's not real."

"He exists in her heart," Taka argued. "Therefore, he is real enough."

Zira looked thoughtful. "You're willing to fight for my honor?"

Taka struck a pose. "I always fight for your honor, my dear Zira."

Mufasa wiped a tear from his eye. "This is the funniest thing I have ever witnessed."

Zira pursed her lips. "Hmm. If you really want to impress me…"

Taka straightened up. "Yes?"

Zira smiled sweetly.

"Try braiding your mane again."

Taka face pawed at Zira's words.

Taka had faced many humiliations in his life.

But this?

This was new.

"I refuse to braid my mane!" Taka roared. "I am a lion, not some decorated court jester!"

Zira, utterly unfazed, continued scrolling through Twisted Wonderland on the magical Pale One rectangle.

"But Leona's mane is braided," she murmured. "And he is still a king."

Taka's eye twitched. "He's not a real king, Zira. He's not even a real person."

Zira sighed dramatically. "Taka, Taka, Taka. That's what a loser would say."

Mufasa, already crying from laughter, nearly choked.

Taka whirled on him. "SHUT UP, MUFASA."

Mufasa smirked. "Hey, I'm just saying—Leona does have a regal air about him."

Taka growled. "He's a cartoon!"

Zira smirked. "A handsome cartoon."

Taka hissed.

—

Meanwhile, Jabari was still in full panic mode.

"The Pale Ones are watching," he whispered. "They see everything."

Kondo, who was only half-listening, frowned as he stared at an empty bag of Pale One snacks. "Yeah, yeah, terrifying. But can we talk about how amazing those 'chips' were?"

Jabari ignored him. "We need a plan. We need to fight back."

Kuki, eyes wide, gasped. "Are we going to war?!"

Biskuti clapped her paws together excitedly. "Oooh, I wanna ride into battle on Uncle Taka's back!"

Jabari, gritting his teeth, grabbed a pawful of mud and smeared it across his face.

"Their technology sees heat," he muttered. "If we coat ourselves in mud, we become invisible."

Zumaridi adjusted her glasses. "That… that is not how it works."

Jabari, already rolling in the dirt, ignored her.

Kondo shrugged. "Eh. Can't hurt."

He promptly smeared mud all over himself.

Kuki and Biskuti joined in immediately.

Within minutes, half the group was covered in mud.

Zumaridi sighed. "You all look ridiculous."

Asani, still in post-caffeine despair, groaned. "You guys realize that if the Pale Ones wanted to attack, they'd have done it already, right?"

Jabari froze.

"…Or they're waiting."

Kondo gasped. "LIKE WE DO WITH GAZELLES?!"

Chaos erupted again.

—

Back at the Lion Guard's lair, Taka was suffering.

Zira was winning.

She had convinced him.

"Just… a small braid," she said, voice dripping with false innocence. "It's not like I'm asking you to change your whole look."

Taka grumbled. "I am doing this under great protest."

Zira grinned, claws gently running through his dark mane.

"I know, darling."

Taka, cheeks burning, allowed the humiliation.

It was fine.

He would endure.

And then Mufasa walked in.

And died laughing.

"OH STARS," Mufasa howled, collapsing to the floor. "YOU LOOK—YOU LOOK LIKE A CUB WHO GOT ATTACKED BY BIRDS!"

Taka, seething, tried to shake the braid loose.

But Zira held firm.

"NO."

Taka froze.

Zira's eyes were glowing with the fury of a thousand suns.

"…Leave the braid," she whispered.

Taka gulped. "Yes, dear."

Mufasa was now wheezing. "I CAN'T—Taka, I swear, if Father sees you like this—"

Taka's ears flattened. "If you breathe a word of this to him, I will personally ensure that you trip over a warthog every morning for the rest of your life."

Zira, still admiring her handiwork, sighed dreamily.

"Ah, if only you had swagger like Leona…"

Taka screamed once again.

Taka sat stiffly, his pride and dignity in shambles.

Zira was admiring her work—his new "Pale One Warrior Look," complete with a beaded necklace and a black leather vest that smelled vaguely of something rotten.

"Oh Stars, it even fits you perfectly!" Zira gushed.

Taka twitched. "I feel like I belong in a traveling circus."

Zira ignored him, fully enthralled in her new obsession.

"You know, Leona Kingscholar isn't just strong, he's also a brilliant tactician!" she purred, scrolling through her magic Pale One rectangle. "And he's a master at chess!"

Taka scoffed. "I play chess! In fact, I play with you all the time!"

Zira hummed. "Yes, but Leona doesn't throw a fit when he loses."

Taka froze.

Mufasa grinned.

"Oh? You mean our dear little brother isn't gracious in defeat?" Mufasa drawled, eyes twinkling with amusement.

Zira sighed. "Leona's also a wonderful uncle to his adorable fluffy nephew, Cheka."

Taka groaned. "I'd be a wonderful uncle! A super supportive uncle, even! If—" He gestured vaguely at Mufasa. "If he ever had a son."

A heavy silence filled the air.

Mufasa's golden eyes narrowed.

"…What's that supposed to mean?"

Taka, realizing his mistake, immediately backpedaled.

"N-Nothing! I just mean—uh—you know—someday! Maybe! No pressure! Hahaha—"

Mufasa's glare intensified.

Zira, ignoring the tension, went back to admiring Leona.

—

Meanwhile, Kondo, Jabari, Kuki, and Biskuti were in full battle mode.

Jabari had constructed a war map using sticks and leaves.

"This is where the Pale Ones are watching," he whispered, pointing to a random rock.

Kondo nodded. "Strategic position."

Kuki bounced excitedly. "Can I be a general?"

Biskuti gasped. "No fair! I wanna be a general!"

Jabari, completely serious, handed them both blades of grass.

"You are now my second-in-commands."

Kuki and Biskuti giggled in delight.

Zumaridi, watching the madness, adjusted her glasses.

"This is… deeply stupid."

—

On the other side of the den, Asani was suffering.

His legs twitched. His paws shook. His ears flicked erratically.

Sarafina, having had enough, wrapped him in a thick pelt and cradled him like a sick cub.

"Shhh," she whispered, gently patting his head.

Asani whimpered. "I can hear colors."

Sarafina sighed. "I told you not to eat strange things."

Asani whined pitifully.

"I miss… speed."

Sarafina rolled her eyes. "You need water and sleep."

"But… the thrill."

She bonked him on the head.

Asani passed out.

—

Back at the main group, Taka had finally snapped.

"THAT'S IT."

Everyone paused.

Taka, still wearing the beaded necklace and leather vest, stormed to the center.

"I AM NOT SOME—SOME—PALE ONE LOOKALIKE!" he roared. "I am PRINCE TAKA! Future KING! And I REFUSE to be compared to some fictional man in a magic rock!"

Zira stared at him.

Then… she smirked.

"…That's exactly what Leona would say."

Taka screamed into the heavens in agony!

Taka stormed off to sulk dramatically on a rock, muttering darkly about how ungrateful everyone was.

Zira, however, was utterly unbothered and continued scrolling through her magic Pale One rectangle, sighing dreamily every time Leona Kingscholar smirked on screen.

Jabari, still on high alert for a Pale One invasion, snarled. "You've been bewitched, Zira."

Zumaridi adjusted her glasses. "Or she just has bad taste."

Zira gasped like she had been mortally wounded.

"How dare you!" she shrieked, holding the magic rectangle to her chest. "Leona is a perfect specimen! A tactical genius! He deeply respects lionesses and values their input! He even says that they're the true rulers of the kingdom!"

Zumaridi shrugged. "Sounds made up."

Jabari narrowed his eyes. "It's a trap. The Pale Ones planted this… sorcery."

Zira rolled her eyes. "Just say you don't have taste and move on."

Meanwhile, Kondo was rooting through the mysterious Pale One container they found earlier.

"Where's the good food?" he complained. "All I found was this weird tube."

Zumaridi peered over.

"That's… toothpaste."

Kondo sniffed it.

"Smells minty."

Kuki and Biskuti gasped.

"Maybe it's Pale One battle paint!" Kuki said, her eyes sparkling.

Biskuti grabbed it. "We should try it!"

—

Sarafina, meanwhile, was still dealing with Asani.

She had wrapped him up completely like a little cub, rocking him back and forth as he groaned dramatically.

"I feel weak," he whispered. "Like a mere mortal."

Sarafina sighed. "You are a mere mortal."

Asani's eyes fluttered open.

"…I see. So this is how it ends."

Sarafina bonked him on the head again.

He passed out.

—

Taka was still sulking when Mufasa sauntered over, looking entirely too smug.

"I see your loyal followers have… diverted their attention."

Taka's eye twitched.

"Zira is temporarily delusional, the others are idiots, and I am still clearly the superior brother," he snapped.

Mufasa chuckled. "Zira braided your mane."

Taka's entire body stiffened.

Slowly, realization dawned.

His paw shot up.

He felt it.

The tiny, delicate braids.

"…No."

Mufasa grinned.

Taka screamed.

The chaos spread through the den like wildfire.

Jabari was frantically throwing dirt over the magic rectangle, convinced burying it would "break the Pale One curse."

Kondo was trying to eat the magic rectangle, because, in his words: "If I eat it, they can't watch us."

Kuki and Biskuti were spinning in terrified circles, screaming, "WE'RE BEING WATCHED! THE PALE ONES SEE EVERYTHING!"

Asani, still wrapped in a pelt and recovering from his caffeine overdose, weakly muttered, "…Tell them I regret nothing."

Meanwhile, Taka, utterly exasperated, was watching Zira continue to gaze lovingly at the image of Leona Kingscholar.

"I cannot believe you," Taka muttered.

Zira, not looking up: "Believe in what, my love?"

Taka seethed. "Me! I am right here and you are drooling over—" He gestured wildly at the screen. "—a Pale One ghost prince!"

Zira sighed dreamily. "Oh, if only."

Taka looked personally offended.

—

Zumaridi clapped her paws together. "Alright. Enough panic. We are going to open the magic rectangle and see how it works."

Jabari froze. "What?"

You can't just open it," Kondo snorted. "It's not food."

Kuki, whispering in terror: "…But what if it is?"

Everyone paused.

Taka groaned. "It is not food, you absolute buffoons—"

But before anyone could stop her, Zumaridi smashed the rectangle open on a rock.

Everyone screamed.

A small spark flickered from the broken device. The screen shattered.

Silence.

"…Did we just kill a Pale One?" Kuki whispered.

Biskuti burst into tears. "We're murderers!"

Jabari fell to the ground. "They're going to retaliate."

Kondo grabbed the remains of the rectangle. "I'LL HIDE THE BODY!"

Taka rubbed his temples. "…I hate all of you."

—

The magic rectangle was ceremoniously buried in a shallow grave.

Kondo gave a heartfelt eulogy about "the fallen Pale One warrior."

Jabari stood vigil, keeping watch for "signs of revenge."

Kuki and Biskuti promised to "live pure lives" so the Pale Ones would forgive them.

Asani, now fully recovered, merely nodded and said, "I saw things. I have no regrets."

Zira?

She was already searching for another magic rectangle.

Taka?

Taka was praying for patience. And also plotting to "accidentally" destroy every single one of those cursed Leona Kingscholar images before Zira's obsession got any worse.

Because if anyone deserved to be worshiped, it was him, not some fictional Pale One prince.

And so, the Pale One Madness came to an end… for now.

End of Special

(For those who don't know, Twisted Wonderland is an app game and upcoming anime with anime boys based on Disney characters Leona Kingscholar is based on Scar so it's all a giant meta-joke.)(Happy April Fools Day!)