A/N- This chapter has references to physical abuse and a LOT of emotional abuse/manipulation. Please consider this when deciding to read the chapter.

This chapter was once again retroactively Beta'd by the magnanimous Dollybigmomma, please consider checking out her work. Once again, she advises me on grammar but the final decisions are mine, so don't think poorly of her based on my choices.

Thank you for reading, please consider reviewing?

Bella

Soon after moving to Phoenix, Bella's mom met Phil. He had such an open face, his smile always wide, and his eyes bright. He was so kind. He brought her toys and her mom flowers. Bella had never seen her mom smile so much. They moved in with him, and Renee and Phil got married. The young girl got to be the flower girl. She had a pretty dress, powder blue and poofy, the skirt perfect for spinning. So she spun. She spun and spun all night, only stopping to dance with Phil and her mom. She was dizzy, but she was happy. They were happy.

The pictures were still up on the wall of the living room, and Bella cursed them every day she saw them. In the photo was a young girl, dark hair in corkscrew curls, and crooked bangs she had cut herself with safety scissors. She had a missing tooth, which she showed off with a smile so big it nearly took up her whole face. She had a healthy glow, pale skin colored by spending half her life outside. Beneath her dress, her knees were surely bandaged or scabbed, having taken a beating from her outdoor adventuring. She stood between her newly married mother and stepfather, their smiles nearly as goofy and overjoyed as the young girl's.

At that point, they didn't know the kind of man Phil would turn out to be. They didn't know that those pictures would end up taunting Bella and Renee from their position on the mantle.

For several years, things continued in their new state of normalcy. Bella lived with her mother and Phil during the school year, spending all her breaks and holidays visiting her father and friends in Forks. She was always a bit more distant with her friends after that, since they knew their time was limited.

Phil changed, he got worse and worse, so slowly that Bella didn't know if he had always been evil or had become it. She used to think about it a lot. Maybe he kept up a front, letting it down over the course of years and years. Maybe he really was the nice man her mom had met and married, but he became the monster he was now.

It didn't really matter much anymore. It didn't change her reality either way. Whether born or created, Phil was what he was now, and she just needed to endure it.

Over the years, the happiness drained from their home. Sometimes, the changes were barely noticeable: smiles lasting just a millisecond less than the day before. Sometimes, it came in one big wave: a new rule put into place, or a line previously uncrossed swiftly trampled over. By the time Bella had turned seventeen, there was no joy left.

Refocusing her eyes from the family photo, Bella saw the reflection of who she had become. Bruises now took the place of the scabs. While her skin was not often broken these days, the blood vessels beneath seemed always to be in a cycle of breaking and healing. Despite living exclusively in constant sunshine, Bella had kept herself indoors to the point that her skin, always trending towards paleness, was now nearly transparent. Dark hair now limp and dull, the curved smile now straightened, long gone except for show in public to ward off rumors. True ones.

Bella had been naive back then. She'd thought the world was a warm, happy place, full of kind people and sunshine. She knew better now; she couldn't trust people. Especially men. As much as Phil hurt her, he'd taught her as well, often by example. Bella knew now that if it weren't him hurting the two of them, it would have been someone else. Maybe it would have been another man her naive mom would have fallen for. Maybe Charlie, had they stayed with him. At least Phil was honest about what he was.

Though, it still could be someone else, in addition to Phil. It was why he made sure to teach Bella to never be too polite to boys and men. He said he wanted to keep her safe from strangers who had no reason not to take it too far, but she knew he also wanted to keep what he considered his. Bella just wanted as little pain and suffering as possible, so of course, she obliged.

Phil said there was something about Bella and her mother, as if their presence invited violence from men, like they were a sort of magnet for it. Girls who were prettier, more kind, smarter…those girls got the few kind men who existed. Should a cruel man find them, he would also find a girl like them to be cruel to. Bella wasn't good enough for a man to withhold his anger and brutality, like they did with those better girls.

Still, she thought maybe it would have been nice to have somewhere safe from them. A safe place to go home to. Where the cruel men of the outside world couldn't follow. A moment of respite, even if it meant worse, though only occasional, mistreatment by strangers.

Though, it sometimes seemed hard to imagine how strangers could make it worse. It had been a particularly difficult night of lessons from Phil, and as always, it led to Bella retreating into her mind. She arrived at school and sat down in her first class just before the bell rang. She found herself floating through school, barely paying attention to what was going on around her. All she could think of was how time was counting down. Every moment was a moment closer to returning to Phil.

Bella was making a list in her head of what she could make for dinner. Phil hadn't liked his breakfast today. His coffee had been too cold because he had woken up late, something Renee was supposed to have prevented. It wouldn't matter to him, though, the punishment would be given to whomever he wanted all the same. Maybe if she made him a meal he really liked, he wouldn't be as upset, maybe it could replace the memory of the breakfast for him. Like that would work. But she had to try. She had to at least try to find a way to ease it.

Bella was jostled by the crowd around her, and she swallowed the bile rising in her throat. Make a plan, make a plan, make a plan. They had some steaks in the freezer, but there was no way to get them thawed by the time Phil got home, let alone cooked. Maybe she could stop by the store on the way home. It was only a few blocks out of the way, maybe-

She felt a body collide with hers, and Bella's world went black.

...

Her body was stiff, despite just coming out of unconsciousness. That was the first thing Bella noticed. Not entirely unusual, as Phil sometimes left her in the living room if she couldn't make it to her room at night.

A night…which one? She couldn't remember what had happened. Her memories were a jumbled haze, and she fought hard against a wave of nausea that hit her. I was at…school? My history class had ended, and I was heading to the library to do some homework during my lunch period, but then…nothing.

The second thing she noticed was that it was bright. Way too bright. She squeezed her eyes shut as she fully returned to her body.

Bella slowly, hesitantly, opened her eyes, still squinting against the near blinding light, and saw a woman at the foot of her bed. No, not her bed, a hospital bed. The room smelled faintly of bleach. The sheets were scratchy against her legs, which…were exposed due to the gown she was in. Well…shit. At the foot of the hospital bed was a nurse who was looking down at a clipboard, her brows furrowed like some kind of puzzle was refusing to be solved.

When she noticed Bella was awake, she got a doctor to come see her. Bella was told that she had 'experienced a heightened stress response' to someone who had bumped into her in the halls. Bella had beaten them, screaming until they pushed her off, and her head had cracked against the floor.

She didn't know why it had happened. She couldn't even imagine it. While Bella had blacked out before, she had never done anything during it. She had a type of auto-pilot she could go into when things were really too much, but she was always somewhat aware, able to form memories. And beating someone… she couldn't imagine that either. Bella always stayed cold towards strangers, but she was never, ever violent, not even to push someone away. She knew violence could cause further retaliation. Another lesson from Phil.

Bella had been taken to the hospital, and they had examined her while she was passed out. She was covered in bruises, of course. Renee had visited her, but Phil had stayed away. The hospital threatened to call child protective services, since her bruises were too old, too numerous, and too well placed to be an accident. Even many accidents. Of course, there was no way to explain her behavior at the school when she had attacked someone.

They had many questions and many thinly veiled accusations, but Renee said nothing. Bella said nothing. When the two were alone, neither of them said anything. She guessed they didn't think they could get anything to stick without one of the two saying anything. Phil had trained them well. As soon as they discharged Bella, Renee took her daughter home.

At the house, the tension was so thick that Renee and Bella were scared even to breathe. Phil had never come so close to being found out before. Of course, the two never said anything, knowing that a confession from one would lead to the punishment of them both. Best-case scenario, they would end up in the hands of another man, whose violence would be unknown. Better the devil you know, and all that.

The two barely said a word as they went around the kitchen preparing dinner. Phil said nothing either, didn't even demand one of them grab him another beer. He just sat in the living room, watching a baseball game with the volume so low, Bella knew it was just so he could listen in case one of them spoke.

While they were afraid of his rage, Phil tended to keep a tighter lid on it when something like this happened, when it got too close to someone seeing the truth. It wasn't a guarantee, though, which was why the two were tiptoeing around. Occasionally, it only made him madder, and he would lash out, but it was always so controlled, so they wouldn't have yet another close call.

It always seemed so bizarre to Bella. People at the hospital couldn't really be so naive after witnessing all the things they had likely seen. So what if she got taken from Phil? They acted as though she wouldn't face similar treatment no matter where Bella went. It could happen at school, in a parking lot, at a grocery store, even in a library. So long as there were men, the chance of being hurt by them was never zero.

As they finally sat down to dinner, Phil still said nothing. The tension was rising and rising, and Bella could feel Renee growing uncomfortable. Or, more uncomfortable. Renee squirmed in her chair until she was no longer able to bear the silence, saying, "Phil, how was your day?"

Phil's answering stare could've cut glass. "Well, my day was fine, until I heard about how my useless whore of a stepdaughter attacked someone at school and then collapsed. How would you like to explain that one, Isabella?" he spat at Bella, and Renee's eyes turned apologetic quickly, before turning downward. That was why Bella had learned to not break the tension, it rarely ended well, but Renee was never good at enduring the anticipation.

"I don't know what happened, I don't remember it happening." She kept her head down, her voice only barely more than a whisper. It was the wrong move. It would have been the wrong move to look him in the eyes, too. There was no winning.

He smacked his hand on the table, causing the silverware to clank against his plate. Renee and Bella both looked up at him. "What a convenient excuse," he nearly growled, a tone so hateful they had hardly heard it before, and only in the gravest of circumstances.

"It won't happen again," Bella said softly. It was a promise she knew she couldn't uphold, but there was nothing else she could do. Bella didn't even remember the incident, let alone have control of it.

"No, it won't," Phil announced, his tone something different now, something she couldn't quite figure out.

After a long silence Bella could feel Renee itching to break, Phil said, "I think it's time you see your father, Isabella." That made her freeze. Phil hadn't let Bella see Charlie since she was twelve.

She looked at Renee slowly, not sure what to do. If the girl was too eager, he would surely rip it away, seeing any glimmer of joy as something she was altogether unworthy of. Or maybe he was lying to Bella just to get her hopes up, with the plan to rip it away regardless. There was no telling with Phil.

"A visit? When?" Bella tried to keep her voice calm, free of any emotion that could rattle her already precarious position.

"No, not a visit, I was thinking maybe you should get out of our hair." He took a bite of his meal, leaning back in his chair casually, like he hadn't just dropped a bomb.

Electricity filled her body. She wasn't sure if it was panic, fear, suspicion, or maybe even excitement, a feeling she tried to keep at bay. Why? What did this mean? Was I going to be free of Phil? What about Renee?

Renee, as delicate as a flyswatter, said, "Are you trying to send her away?"

Phil's glare turned to her for a moment, until she looked appropriately obedient before continuing "Isabella has caused us quite a bit of trouble. She's getting people to check up on us, and she's fighting at school. I've been nice enough to let her stay with us for this long, but I'm starting to think she's incorrigible. I've tried everything I could, but none of my lessons have stuck."

Bella cringed, the word lessons meaning far more than just the things he taught her. That caught his attention, but she stayed quiet, looking at the little bit of food on her plate. Was Bella supposed to be happy? Probably, but what about Renee? If he didn't have Bella to let his frustrations out on too, would Renee get it worse?

She didn't say anything, of course she didn't, he didn't ask for her opinion, and he didn't care. His mind had been made up before he'd ever said anything.

"Renee, call Charlie. Make it happen. Soon." and that was all he said. He resumed eating and finished talking, for the night if they were lucky. Bella and Renee looked at each other nervously. There was no room to ask questions. It wasn't up for debate. Per usual, their new reality came much without warning, and without their input.

...

Bella didn't go to school for the rest of the week. She wasn't sure if that was Phil's decision or the school's. She packed slowly, still unsure if Phil would take back the order, maybe even punish her for thinking she deserved to go. He always jerked around Bella's privileges; he liked watching her get excited, then taking it away. It was one of the few cruelties she'd really gotten used to. Bella tried not to let herself get excited anymore.

Renee, for once letting the silence stay unbothered, walked around cautiously the rest of the week, practically tiptoeing so as to not be heard. Phil didn't shout, the recent scare too serious to risk it, apparently. The doctors had gotten a full view of Bella, more than they'd ever had before. She guessed that did send up more red flags than the occasional broken arm or twisted ankle, but it was nothing compared to what could happen to her.

There were only a few items Bella had that she considered precious, or even important. There was an ancient copy of The Tale of Peter Rabbit, nestled inside was a piece of paper, an old friend's home phone number, and an email scribbled in the handwriting of a child. Bella hadn't looked at it for years, but she had both memorized, not that she had used either since she was about thirteen.

Inside the book was a strip of photos of Renee and Bella, taken in the short time between moving to Arizona and meeting Phil. Her favorite was the one where Renee had pulled the young Bella onto her lap, tickling her. Bella was laughing and screaming, and the photo was taken right in that moment of pure, unfiltered joy. There were a few other photos, all from the pre-Phil era, or from the few summers Bella had gotten to spend in Forks without him. The only reason they were still intact was because they were hidden in a book, one that Phil had never caught her reading. And last, Bella had a small bracelet that she hadn't dared to wear in years, she didn't even know if it would fit anymore. It was a worn piece of leather with a small, hand-carved wooden wolf charm on it, another token from a friend long gone. Bella was sure that friend would be different now…puberty ruined boys, of course. But it was still nice to have, a reminder of a friendship unmarred by crushes and lust and selfish desires.

It had been so easy back then, with Jake. Bella had run through the woods with him and his friends, the only thing different being the color of her skin, and the frequency that she tripped. Bella wasn't a girl, and they weren't boys. Hell, she'd even taken her shirt off to swim like they had when they'd come across a lake in the woods, and the children hadn't brought their swimsuits. It made Bella queasy to imagine what it would be like now.

Bella wrapped those precious items in a hoodie, and placed them in the very bottom of the bag. She had somehow managed to keep some things from Phil after all these years, and if he saw her interact with them, he would surely know how important they were to her, and he would take them. She didn't feel safe until the hoodie with her personal items was buried underneath piles of other clothes that Bella was sure would be too cold for Washington.

She loaded her backpack with the books she cared less about, but wanted them under her protection all the same. Bella wasn't sure if Charlie was the kind to destroy items, but she knew Phil would if Bella did something to upset him enough, and he didn't get all his anger out on Renee.

Just then, Phil appeared in the girl's doorway. Without looking up, she felt his looming form blocking her only escape. Phil didn't say anything, he just gave Bella a calm, cruel stare before closing the door behind him.

Phil stepped closer to her, and said he needed to have a talk with Bella before she left for Forks. She slowly stood up and faced him, her eyes glued to his chin, too afraid to meet his eyes. He reminded her about all the rules and lessons he had drilled into her over the past years, with new and updated ones to fit her new living situation, as he called it.

Any and all punishments Bella would deserve would be given to Renee in her absence. Bella would get them all the next time she came to visit, which she would have to do on every available holiday.

Bella was told to 'stay good'. That meant constant check-ins and updates. It also meant she had to follow all of Charlie's rules as well, and that Phil and Renee would be checking with him to make sure Bella wasn't lying with her updates.

Phil's voice shifted from his vague warning, more procedural tone to one of direct threats of violence. "Remember, though, Isabella, I can see right through you, I can see your lies and deception, so don't even try it, or another lesson will be waiting for you here." The feeling of his eyes boring into her nearly made her cower, but she knew he would see it as an invitation to really make her cower, so she forced herself to remain still. "I know you'll be around all your old friends, but don't think it'll be safe. They changed, and so did you. They'll see what you are now, and they'll see the same target on your back that all men do. I will know if you get too comfortable, and if they don't teach you better, I will." He brushed a piece of Bella's hair behind her ear and put a finger under her chin, making her lock eyes with him.

"Do you understand, Isabella?" Phil's breath smelled like stale beer, like usual. Bella nodded, and he smiled, adding, "Good girl," before leaving the room. Her breath, which seemed to perpetually be strangled in his presence, escaped in a ragged, almost relieved exhale. Almost.

Besides that warning, he didn't lay a hand on her for the rest of the week, something she was grateful for, even if it was only so her body would be a blank slate for the next violent man to come along.

Probably a welcoming gift for Charlie she thought to herself.

At the end of the week, Bella grabbed her bags and put them in the car, Phil ready to take her to the airport. There was silence once again as he drove the three of them, the tension so thick even Bella had a hard time not cutting through it.

She didn't have much in the way of possessions, which at least made the airport easier. She only had a small duffle bag, bulging at the seams with her warmest clothes, and a backpack full of books. It was better that way. She wasn't sure if Phil would have been willing to pay if she'd had more bags anyway.

Bella hugged Renee, closing her eyes to take in the sensation. Renee's was the only touch she'd had in a long time that didn't lead to pain. Their relationship had changed as Phil had changed. Renee, who had once been Bella's protective and loving - though flighty - mother, had turned into more of a peer. When Phil turned his violent attention to Bella, and her mother had stopped deterring him, her 'mom' had become Renee. Despite this, Bella still loved her. She was still scared for Renee's fate once she got on that plane and left her alone with Phil.

"I'm sorry," Bella whispered in Renee's ear, finding herself near tears. The feelings she had been keeping at bay flooded her all at once. She only had to keep them in check for a few minutes more. Soon, Bella could cry in the plane's bathroom. Phil didn't like to see their tears, not when he thought they weren't earned, and Bella didn't want to be the reason he turned on Renee so soon. Though she doubted either of them could really prevent it. He had been holding back for too long, and he would surely snap the moment he and Renee arrived home, if not earlier.

The two women pulled out of their hug, and they looked at each other, Renee's eyes also shining with unshed tears. "Oh honey, don't you worry. I'll be okay, and we'll see each other again soon. Thanksgiving will be here before you know it." Renee wiped her face quickly and backed up, standing next to Phil, who raised a single hand to Bella, a wave.

"You be good to your dad, Isabella." His words were innocent enough to the strangers around them, but Bella knew what he meant. He was reminding her that her actions had consequences, and now she would be receiving those consequences from Charlie, however he saw fit.

Bella nodded before turning, heading towards the plane that would take her to her new life.