24 February

Lost and Found. -n. 1. a room in a public place for items left behind and from which owners may retrieve them

Rogue sat at her desk in her room, pouring over one of the overly lengthy passages assigned in her English class as homework. Losing herself in her schoolwork was preferred to other things. It also kept her away from the others, though she had no doubt she'd inevitably have to find Hank for his input on something. Rogue had enough with relying on other people, and after Veronica's persistence at Rogue hitting it up with Hank, she felt like she needed to double down on her resolve of independence.

She'd gone over one paragraph a minimum of three times before a polite knock sounded at her open door. Grunting in mild frustration, Rogue dropped the book and stared at the intruder with an impetuous glare.

To her surprise, Warren stepped past the threshold. He rustled his wings before pulling them in tighter. "We're going out to the club Ali's performing in tonight. Do you want to join us?"

"Who's we?" Rogue asked curtly.

"Scott and Jean are coming, and Hank said he'd go. There's room for you in the car, too."

"You want me ta go to Ali's show – who hates me, by the way – ta hang out in a crowd that Ah can't touch an' have ta stay on guard around the entire time Ah'm out just in case someone accidentally does touch me. An' for what? So Hank ain't fifth wheelin' it?"

Warren brought his hands up in front of him defensively. "I thought I'd invite you to help take your mind off things," he said. "I really wasn't trying to hook you up with Hank."

"Ah'll pass," Rogue scoffed. "Ah've got homework to do."

"Then what will you do? When you run out of homework as a distraction?"

"Ah dunno!" Rogue slammed the book onto the desk, jumping to her feet in a flare of anger. "Ah guess Ah'll climb in mah bed an' continue cryin' mah eyes out. Is that what ya wanna hear?"

His wings quivered, and Rogue thought for a second she'd scared him with her outburst. But then his hands curled into fists and his nose wrinkled as his lips pulled into a thin line, betraying the real emotion he tried and failed to hold back. "No! Keep pushing everyone away, Rogue. Lash out to everyone that's trying to extend a hand. See where that gets you." Warren turned sharply and disappeared into the hallway, his wings trailing after him.

Rogue stood in place, staring after him in the empty hall. She wasn't sure what she felt. The fury was hot and quick, but it wasn't what resonated within her. Her breathing no longer seemed sustaining enough and she opened her mouth to better pull in the oxygen. Tears sprang to her eyes against her will, and deep overwhelming despair filled him from the chest out.

She was cursed. Everyone would leave her eventually, whether or not she pushed them away. She'd done everything Remy asked of her as she learned what a relationship meant, and he left her anyway.

How many other people only talked to Rogue because they felt obligated?

Ororo was her team leader. She had a responsibility to interact with Rogue so that the team could use her. But Rogue continued to fail them. She was weak and her power was far from offensive or long range. Her fighting skills were still subpar even after nearly two months of training. Rogue knew that her team despised her for holding them back. Ali was simply the only one that wore it on her sleeve.

Kurt stuck around only because Ororo asked him to. The two of them were close. Kurt spent a lot of his time with Ororo, so it made sense that Ororo assigned Kurt as the best one to teach Rogue how to fight. But did Kurt ever seek Rogue out? They weren't friends, but friendly acquaintances. Rogue spent his time for him and nothing else.

Hank helped her with her homework, almost daily sometimes when the training scheduling wasn't too tight. He obliged her with time outside of the mansion, but Rogue was beginning to understand that it wasn't necessarily because he wanted to. He was a nice guy with boundary issues. He wasn't going to say no if it hurt her feelings. But that's all their relationship was.

Scott drove Rogue to and from school and kept things strictly business. Interactions with him were borne of convenience. He was the third team leader, after all. He drove her because he was duty-bound to ensure she received her education.

Talking with Betsy more often lately was coincidental. She humored Rogue with every exchanged word, but Rogue had an inkling that she dipped inside Rogue's head to make sure each of those words were honey coated. Knowing what Rogue wanted to hear was half the battle.

No one was actually friends with Rogue. Rogue didn't know how to make friends. And the one friend that Rogue thought she had made on her own, Veronica, she only stuck around because she was the school's gossip and Rogue was a ripe source. Rogue knew the hottest guys from each year. Rogue alone could bring her juicy details that kept her imagination roaring. But it wasn't because of who Rogue was.

Rogue was a nobody. She could disappear and no one would bat an eye.

She fell to the floor with a racking sob. That was why Remy manipulated her. Because maybe it was fun to see how far he could push things before he broke her. Rogue was a game that could easily be stuffed back away.

She'd lost herself, trying to fit in. Thinking she did fit in. She became what everyone around her seemed to want her to be. Now she had to figure out who she was on her own. She wasn't going to be a burden.