Of course I wasn't able to immediately see what remained of the 12th, as General Alcas insisted upon an in-person debriefing of my activities. Fortunately, he was a military man through and through, and I was able to keep things strictly concerned with the tactics and engagements involved rather than any grandiose tales. By the time it was done however, hours had passed before I was finally directed towards where the survivors of the 12th Valhallan were camped. It was perhaps the hardest thing I'd ever intentionally done, walking to the shattered remnants of the 12th. As I passed other regiments, the Guardsmen parted before me for reasons beyond my Commissarial garb. The rest of my little convoy were already spreading the rumors of my supposed miracles and sainthood, and nothing spread through an Imperial Guard camp like gossip. Most were conflicted, at least until more witnesses were brought forth. I also saw them holding the tainted water that the members of the convoy had gathered, a few Guardsmen sipping at it tentatively. I thought of ordering it spilled, but what would the point be beyond potentially tainting the soil here as well? My makeshift militia would doubtlessly take the Imperial troops to the valley soon enough, and there'd be no good reason for me to give in order to stop them from making use of a river of seemingly pure water; besides the truth of course, which I couldn't offer up.
Of course it would probably only be a matter of time before a Sanctioned Psyker or somebody more knowledgeable about such things discovered the truth, about how the water was no doubt teeming with daemonic corruption. I clutched my Aquila with a sense of dread at the thought of being exposed like that. What would become of me? I wouldn't die, at least not in the traditional sense unless the Inquisition had some means of permanently dispatching daemons that I didn't know about (1). But being trapped in the Warp, forced to let down the God-Emperor in the worst way possible? No. That was a fate worse than death. So trapped in my own morbid thoughts as I was, I would have completely passed the 12th's encampment by, if not for a shout from a familiar voice.
"Cai!" I turned, to see Divas running up to me, hand raised and waving at me. I felt such relief seeing him alive when I'd feared the worst, and in that moment realized just how much I truly did value him as a friend. Despite his ragged appearance, he was a beautiful sight to me. He looked like he hadn't slept in three weeks with the dark rings under his eyes, and smelled like he hadn't bathed in five. The latter became particularly evident when he embraced me in a hug. Perhaps it was just the fact I was so used to Jurgen's aroma, or wasn't that fresh myself, but I didn't mind the smell. Overcome with emotion, I returned the embrace, patting him firmly on the back to reassure myself that he was there. Divas pulled back, beaming at me as he held me by the shoulders. "Oh it's so good to see you!" He exclaimed, truthfulness radiating from him.
I swallowed a lump in my throat down, blinking at what must have been some dust kicked up by the passing vehicles. "It's good to see you too, Toren." It was a rare thing for me to use Divas' first name, as I needed to maintain a professional distance, but if ever its use was warranted it was at this time. I licked dry lips, unsure how to bring up what I must, so I barreled on ahead and just did so. "I… I heard what happened…" I got out, throat clenching and leaving unsaid that I'd feared for my friend's safety. Divas let go, nodding solemnly but with bitterness in his eyes as he began giving me a more in-depth explanation.
"After you were thought lost… Mosture started this long rant about how you were a coward and a deserter… None of us believed that, of course!" He said, evidently thinking my face turning pale and twisting into an expression of horror at the thought of someone finally seeing through me was a look of rage. "And he wrote you off completely, then got us a new Commissar. We never realized how damn lucky we were to have you until he came along."
I felt my stomach drop at the pure hate in Divas' voice when he mentioned this other Commissar. Throne on Terra, what had Mosture done while I was absent? I feared asking, but even my cowardice was overwhelmed by my absolute need to know. "What happened?"
"This Commissar seemed to think Chekov was the ideal Commander." Divas spat, causing me to wince as his hatred wafted in the air like the scent of seared meat with heavy spices. Any Valhallan knew that hated name, and even though I did not hail from that world I hoped that one day I could get within a room with only me and him; I would later learn though that an Eldar beat me to it, and there were many toasts raised to the Oathsworn who did the deed amongst all regiments of Valhalla once the news spread. For Divas to suggest that this Commissar actually admired that butcher… It caused my dread at what must have happened to spike. Divas continued, his anger smoldering within him. "When we got down to the planet with the first wave, we were the most intact regiment. Mosture ordered us to the front lines; when two of the junior officers questioned that decision on the account of us being artillery…" Divas steadied himself, gathering his strength to get out the next word, a word that chilled me to the bone. "Decimations."
My stomach sank to the bottom of my boots. "Decimations? F-for two people having actual tactical sense and making sound suggestions?!" I whispered in utter horror. I knew that the crimson sash gave me and other Commissars a great deal of power despite being outside the chain of command in the regiments we joined, but I'd never even thought of ever using it in such a way, and while there were maniacs like that in the Commissariat, they were thankfully rare. Unfortunately, it seemed as if the 12th had gotten one of them after becoming used to my laxer style of discipline, showing them just how dangerous a Commissar could truly be. Now I knew that they'd never see me the same way again, thinking that with a snap of my fingers they'd lose a tenth of their men.
Divas nodded sadly, with a resigned expression at my reaction. "We… We were halfway through the platoons with it when the General stopped it. He said it was a waste, but he didn't try to censure the Commissar beyond that. Thus, we had to organize penal platoons out of the remainder who would have been decimated." He let out a shaky breath. "Mosture became… paranoid. He kept thinking you were always watching him, and anyone who even mentioned your name would be shot by him or his pet psychopath… Then came the first advances to the land bridge. That depot you apparently fought the Warboss in?" At this he brightened for a moment, looking at me with admiration. "Still can barely believe that you pulled that off Cai, we thought it'd take an Astartes to take him out bare minimum… Anyway, that was where he ordered us to hold out. We ran out of ammo there, and were surrounded. Mosture and the other Commissar ordered us to fix bayonets and charge in all directions, or they'd use what ammo they'd kept for themselves to shoot us all as cowards."
I was at a complete loss for words. That wasn't even a waste of lives; that was murder, murder and madness, pure and simple. "How… how'd you escape?" I asked shakily, reminded once more of how close I'd come to losing my friend. Divas shrugged, as seemingly baffled by his survival as I was.
"I still can't believe it, but the Clown Elves showed up." Divas replied. "One of them looked at me funny, and said, 'You cannot die here, Karuchi Vohra(2)'. He then shot the Colonel and his pet, and a frakton of them cleared a path for us, allowing us to fall back. One of them, the apparent leader I guess based on how he was the one giving orders, said… " The man paused for a moment, obviously dredging his memory for the exact words before repeating them carefully. "'When you see the Slavhreenur again, ask him what he thought of my customer service'. Apparently this 'Slavhreenur' is you, based on what the other Eldar that've been in and out of the camp have said. What does that word mean anyway, Cai?"
Wonderful. That damned clown that got me into this mess had apparently saved Divas for some other nefarious purpose (though once I learned WHY he was saved… I would understand). I pinched the bridge of my nose and grumbled. "Two stars." I finally declared reluctantly. Sure, he'd damned me to daemonhood with his machinations, but he'd saved a planet and my friend. That earned him at least one above the bare minimum.
"You purchased something from a Xeno, Cai?" He didn't even sound particularly shocked, just impressed. Still I felt the need to defend my actions.
"In my defense, he was wearing a hat that covered his ears. I didn't know he was a Xeno at the time." I admitted sheepishly. Divas just looked incredulous for a bit, then shrugged.
"I see… But if he was fond enough of you to save us, and considering we're not being executed for heresy for working with their kind anyways, I guess it's fine. Uhm, also, how'd that last bit happen? The Eldar working with us for a change?"
"That was… my fault." I admitted again. I'd already considered him something of a friend, and had just come to realize just how much I valued that friendship, so I'd tell him at least that much of the truth. "That Xeno gave me something that I used to… Well… Bargain with one of the Dark Gods… I ended up giving the Eldar the option of joining with the God-Emperor…"
Divas seemed quite shocked, though still impressed. "And you're fine, right? Not a heretic?"
"Would I be wearing this if I was?" I asked, holding up the Aquila. It was even the truth to some extent, since Father Anthony had said that even if I was tainted I wasn't a heretic, at least not yet and never if I could help it. My friend looked at it and nodded, seeming to fully accept that logic.
"Fair enough… So… You convinced a good portion of the Eldar to join with us in service of the God-Emperor?"
"By accident." I clarified, still embarrassed.
"Evidently a happy one." Divas replied drily, looking back towards the camp. "Can't believe that we're friends with the knife-ears now…"
"I imagine they took offense at that." I deadpanned. Though if Illric's sense of humor was anything to judge these newly liberated Eldar by…
Divas' groan confirmed my suspicion as he glared at an Eldar standing off in the distance talking with some other Guardsmen; there was no heat in the expression though, just exasperation tinged with a growing fondness. "Worse… They started calling us 'spoon-ears' in response. One of them wondered if there were any 'fork ears' to go along with it!" I couldn't help but chuckle at that, before turning solemn once more. I'd had my tanna, now I had a duty to perform.
"Is there anywhere private I could collapse?" I asked Divas. He looked embarrassed at my question, face flushing and looking at the ground as he scuffed a boot in the dirt.
"We… We saved you a tent… In the hopes that you'd return." Divas admitted. I was genuinely touched by such a gesture, and showed it by giving him another hug. After all, as far as I knew it might be the last time I saw him, should the Emperor decide to purge me from existence as I probably deserved.
"Thank you… I'll take my leave." I replied, releasing Divas then slipping into the tent he'd pointed out. All my things were in a footlocker at the end of the bunk; they must have gone to great effort to collect it, especially if that bastard Mosture was as paranoid about me as Divas had said. They even had a thermos of Tanna waiting for me. I won't deny that a tear fell from my face. I was truly touched by their thoughtfulness as I held the thermos and drank deeply. One last additional taste of the greatest drink to ever grace the galaxy(3), and then I lay down on the bedroll and closed my eyes, trying to project myself outside of my mortal body.
After some time, I found myself staring at a thick purple haze spread across the sky, if you could call it that. After all, what was really 'sky', 'ground', or any other concepts belonging to sanity and reality in this place? I knew that I'd appear here, in the realm of Slaanesh. Thankfully, said Dark God wasn't there to approach me, though I imagine that even a renegade Daemon Prince wouldn't attract enough attention from her to stop whatever foul degeneracy she was doing at the time(4). With a thought, I reshaped myself, making myself look like my human form, purging any appearance of corruption or malign influence. Then I began to will the souls within me to be made manifest. Sure enough, small white clouds left me, each one feeling like I'd had a full meal ripped from my stomach. They began to coalesce into the forms they had taken in life, fearfully looking around. I cleared my throat, bringing these poor damned souls attention upon myself.
"Saint… where are we?" One of them in the uniform of the Perlian PDF whispered. I decided to give them a partial truth, though only a small part of one.
"We are within the realm of Slaanesh. I believe that part of my trial in guiding you to the Golden Throne is that I must cross this forsaken god's territory before reaching the God-Emperor." That seemed to comfort the dozens of souls I'd expelled somewhat, the belief that I was prepared for this. Sometimes a comforting lie is better than the truth in my experience; well, always in my experience unless I'm the one being lied to rather than the one doing the lying. I began to look around, and out of the corner of my eye, I saw it. The faintest wisps of gold mingling with the purple of the Dark Prince's realm. "Follow me." I ordered the gathered souls. In a flight of fancy, I summoned a walking staff, and set out. I could feel the souls following me, like lambs to the slaughter. That was their fate if I failed, to be slaughtered, feasted upon by daemons. And I had no intentions of letting that happen. All of my unwitting flock would stand before the true God-Emperor if I had anything to say about it. As I walked, I would occasionally feel one of them lose their way. It was only too easy to teleport behind them and guide them back into formation.
After what felt like an hour, but might as well have been an eon within the Warp, the golden barrier began to get closer and more prominent. Before I could reach it, however, I heard screams. I whipped my head around, seeing if the flock I was leading was under attack, but it wasn't one of them who was screaming. In the distance, I saw dozens of daemons racing towards what seemed to be a small bubble similar to that of Gellar Field, and slamming into the edge of it. It would flicker but hold, albeit barely. Curious, I walked towards it, bidding the souls following me to stay just a bit back for their own safety but not so far away that I couldn't protect them. As I approached, the other daemons began to notice me, and hiss in agitation.
"G-get your own!" One of them stammered, phlegm spewing from its rotting maw. In response, I drew my chainsword, purple fire leaping from it.
"No," I replied evenly, resolutely. "Leave." The putrid little thing seemed to find its courage, spitting definitely at me.
"NO! I found it! We found it! He will belong to the plaguefather, D-" I couldn't let him continue, lest my nature be exposed. I swung the blade down, and the daemon was sliced in two, each half burning away. To my shock, it turned into a cloudy mist that entered me. I nearly gagged as the taste of badly pickled fish assaulted my tongue, heavy on the garlic and beginning to ferment. The other daemons took a look at what had happened, and bolted. Now it was just me and the bubble. The screaming was much, much louder… and was young. Very young. I could see through it, and saw myself staring at a frightened young boy, tears streaming down his cheeks as he rocked back and forth. He couldn't have been more than seven. I tried to knock on the bubble to tell him it was alright, but it popped the second I put my fist on it.
Frak. I'd just unwittingly stripped the poor child of what had been protecting him.
The screams became desperate shrieks to the God-Emperor for salvation, and I tasted his racing emotions and through that, his soul. The boy was a Psyker, and from the feeling, a very, VERY powerful one. And I'd just damned him. I could not let that stand, I needed to fix this. But first I needed to at least try and calm the boy down.
"Hey, look at me." I whispered, trying to be comforting as I reached out to him. I could see where he was, an abandoned church that stank of degeneracy. "Hey, it's all right." I soothed, bleeding over into realspace in an act of will. The child was whimpering now, eyes wide in panic as he stared at me. Frak, he probably saw me for what I was, a Daemon. But I couldn't just leave him there, exposed Psykers were a danger to everyone around them. I then placed a hand on him, causing him to squirm but he was too terrified to truly try and get away. Focusing on my desire to protect this young servant of the God-Emperor, I willed my protection upon him. Sure enough, a small mark appeared on his neck (5). His hand clutched the mark, fearful. I could feel his soul become attached to me; damning, but I could feel that through that connection I could offer him some form of protection.
"Fear not, faithful servant of the God-Emperor." I began, words grand yet comforting. "For He on Terra has heard your prayer, and delivered salvation unto you."
"B-but y-y-you…" The poor lad stammered, still fearful though the panic began to fade as I failed to cause him deliberate harm.
"By my hand, I have placed you under my protection. No foul creatures of the Warp shall be able to lay a claim upon your soul." I declared, trying my best to sound like a caring preacher, like I imagined Father Anthony might when comforting a younger member of his congregation. With that, I withdrew fully back into the Warp, and saw that a purple sheen of my power had covered the renewed bubble now; similar to what I did for the ships I'd traveled upon after becoming what I was. Hopefully that helped, and I didn't just condemn a child to be burnt at the stake. The souls around me applauded and cheered, evidently having fully bought my performance and wholeheartedly approving of me 'saving' a child. I waved a hand, bringing them to silence and attention once more.
"Come, let us hurry to the Throne." I intoned, projecting a sense of concern for their souls. Sure enough, they lapped it up, just like they'd lapped up my groxshit when they were alive.
God-Emperor, I am such a piece of shit.
I led them onwards, following that golden light. It was then that, for the first time since Slawkenberg, I felt truly fatigued. I leaned on my staff, taking a moment to catch my breath; still wasn't sure if I needed to breathe or not in the Warp, but old habits die hard.
"Saint?" One of the braver souls whispered, voice full of concern for me.
"I'm fine." I lied. My palms were itching up a storm. My survival instinct was absolutely screaming at me to turn around and run… But I couldn't do that. I couldn't damn these souls because of my cowardice. So I pressed on, fighting through the fatigue. As the purple faded, and gold overtook, it became harder to take each step. Eventually I stumbled, and only barely caught myself on my walking staff.
"Saint Ciaphas!" Another of the souls exclaimed in alarm. "What's wrong!?"
Frak, what was I to do? If they lost confidence in me and abandoned my side, they'd be picked off by Warp predators. Quickly, I came up with a lie, something that would sound plausible and keep them from panicking. "I have heaped all sins you have made upon myself, so that you may all pass through to the God-Emperor with ease." I told them, smiling kindly at them as if I truly cared that much. They seemed to buy it, and we moved forward. It was then that I heard a shriek of rage, and on instinct drew my chainsword. Just in time too, as another sword slammed against it. I looked at the wielder and fought the urge either to kneel or swear. It was Saint Celestine herself, radiant in her golden armor and pure white wings. Her eyes burned with the Wrath of the God-Emperor and her fair lips (6) were parted in a snarl of anger. With a wave of her arm, I felt the souls behind me ripped from me, screaming my name as they vanished.
"Daemon…" She hissed, eyes full of what seemed to be righteous fury. I might have voided my bowels at the thought of fighting what appeared to be Saint Celestine herself, but I had other things taking my attention.
"Where did you take them?!" I shouted, not wanting those souls to be on my conscience if they'd been ripped away from their journey to the Golden Throne.
"Away from you." She growled, shoving me back. I managed to steady myself as she leapt at me. Our blades continued to meet time after time, with her pushing me back a step with each blow; she was trying to push me back from the God-Emperor's realm. With speeds that would not have been possible for a mere mortal, we fought. Normally I would have submitted before one of the Emperor's most beloved Saints, but my fears were still the same. If the Great Enemy could take on The God-Emperor's form… Could they blaspheme further by impersonating Saint Celestine?! Surely the real Saint Celestine would be able to beat me with a casual flick of her wrist! This must be an impostor, sent by the Ruinous Powers to deter me and steal the souls I'd safeguarded into damnation!
"WHERE ARE THEY?!" I roared again, pushing more strength into my blows. The impostor played the trick of being the real Celestine well, flames leaping from her sword. Well, two could play that game. Purple flames leapt from mine, and I pushed. It was like I was pulling muscles in my head, as I forced those white flames back, coating her blade with my own. With a pained shriek she dropped it, and I immediately pinned her to the ephemeral ground, blazing sword at her neck. The fear in her eyes further cemented my belief that this was an impostor, for surely not only could the real Saint Celestine best me handily but what did she have to fear from me?
"Tell me where they are, Warp-Spawn, so I can send a message back to whichever of the Four Fucks you serve, two messages." I snarled, eyes blazing with righteous wrath. "Number one, never again blaspheme by taking the holy form of Saint Celestine. And for the other, do not stop my ferrying of the souls I guard to the God-Emperor."
Shocked and with a look of confusion on her face, the daemon waved her arm and the souls of those I had consumed reappeared. Satisfied, I kicked her away, and watched her fly elsewhere.
"What… What happened?" One of them stammered, justifiably shaken by the experience.
"A daemon took the form of Saint Celestine to tempt me from my path." I declared, for once being entirely truthful in my belief. "We must waste no more time." The path continued, and each step I took grew harder and harder. My clothes were the first thing to start to smolder. I tried to pat the embers out, but they burned far hotter than any normal fire. The Fires of The Emperor were upon me, and I felt happiness for it meant I was taking my charges down the right path. I felt the heat continue to grow as I kept moving forwards. I soon attempted to break out into a jog, so that I could deliver the souls following me faster. Then, after I crossed a certain threshold… the smoldering stopped.
And the flames rose.
There was no end to the agony. This must have been what the fires of damnation felt like. I could see the pillar of fire surrounding myself climbing higher and higher, as if trying to simulate the descent into damnation(7).
"SIR!" Many of my followers yelled, distraught at my pain. I couldn't explain to them that I deserved this, that as a Daemon Prince daring to enter the God-Emperor's holy realm it was only right and expected that I should burn for my transgression.
"We're almost there!" I called, taking off in a dead sprint as the fires kept getting hotter and hotter with every step I took. I grit my teeth, my very soul alight. Further within the golden realm I dashed, keeping the souls following me together with my burning body lighting their way. Finally, after what felt like an eternity, I saw it. I saw Him.
Upon the Golden Throne, I could see the God-Emperor. In the Warp, I saw no skeleton or corpse as the followers of the Ruinous Powers called Him. Rather, I saw Him in His human form, albeit with many scars from His duel with Horus. He turned to look at me, and stared. I slowly began to kneel. I knew without a doubt that this wasn't an illusion, this was Him, the Master of Mankind (and the Oathsworn Eldar too I supposed).
We had made it. I then began to push the souls I carried away from me, and towards Him. It felt like I was tearing open my skin, ripping my stomach out of my body, and squeezing it, trying to wring them out of me. Slowly but surely, however, even while I burned, I managed. They began to glide behind the Throne, to the promise of Rest. As the last of them passed beyond the Golden Throne to be fully within the Emperor's Realm, He spoke to me.
CIAPHAS. WHY ARE YOU HERE? The God-Emperor asked with… concern(8)?
Head bowed as I knelt, I asked the question that had haunted me since I'd spoken with Father Anthony and been reminded that the God-Emperor didn't simply just speak to His followers, let alone an abomination such as me. "M-My Emperor… Mulenz and Grear… Are… Are they…?"
The response was immediate, and filled my heart with joy. I TOOK THEM FROM YOU.
I let loose a heaving sob of relief at the knowledge I hadn't surrendered those two to damnation, even as the Emperor continued to speak.
THAT DOES NOT ANSWER MY QUESTION. WHY ARE YOU HERE, IN A REALM THAT ACTIVELY WANTS YOU UNMADE?
Burning and in unbearable pain, I gritted out an answer, trying to explain myself to my Eternal Liege. "I… I couldn't be sure that those around me… t-those who were damned by my presence… would be able to get here… I couldn't risk anything preventing them from reaching You." I babbled out, tongue nearly tripping over my own words. He just stared down at me from upon the Throne, eyes considering.
SO YOU MARCHED THROUGH THE WARP TO THE ONE PLACE WITHIN IT WHERE DAEMONS BURN. YOU… YOU ARE AWARE THAT YOU'RE ON FIRE, RIGHT?
I nodded, keeping my head bowed as the flames licked away at my regenerating flesh. "I am… But it's a price I am willing to pay, my Lord. I… I swore to bring the faithful unto You no matter the risk or challenge… Even as Daemons took the form of Saint Celestine…"
He spoke, causing me to halt my rambling explanation. UMMM… THAT… THAT WAS SAINT CELESTINE.
"...What?" I squeaked in shock, fearing that surely I had finally taken the step into outright heresy by having opposed one of His actual Saints. "I- I assure you my Emperor that had I known…"
Deep, booming laughter echoed through the massive chamber, the force threatening to blow me to pieces.
ARE YOU TRYING TO ONE-UP SANGUINIUS? The Emperor asked me(9).
"W-what?" I got out, blinking in honest confusion as the flames still burned me. His Most Holy Majesty explained, as if I deserved anything from Him, let alone an explanation!
I MEAN IN REGARDS TO SACRIFICING YOURSELF FOR ME, BECAUSE YOU'RE SERIOUSLY GETTING THERE.
"I… I could never compare to one of your Loyal Sons…" I gasped out. Then, a thought occurred to me as my hair caught alight. "My Lord… I… I encountered a being that called himself… Mag'Ladroth…"
There was a long sigh. AND WHAT DOES THE CANID IN A DRAGON'S BODY WANT?
Yet again, I was left befuddled by the words emanating from Him. "I… what?"
The Emperor went on, though Throne save me it still didn't make much sense to me. IF YOU'RE WORRIED IF HE'S A THREAT, HE'S NOT… UNLESS YOU STOP RUBBING HIS BELLY, THEN THE PUPPY EYES REALLY GET TO YOU. FRAK… I'D TELL YOU THE REST OF THE STORY, BUT YOU'RE STILL ON FIRE AND I REALLY DON'T WANT YOU TO DIE. SO TO BE CLEAR; HE'S NOT A THREAT, HE IS AN ALLY. AN UNPREDICTABLE ONE, BUT AN ALLY.
I nodded, accepting His word yet with another question. "And… and what of the Eldar?"
The Emperor gave a smile, actually beaming at me, and I'd have withstood the fires consuming me for an eternity in order to see that smile of genuine happiness on His holy face.
YOU PROVIDED ME WITH A GREAT SERVICE, CIAPHAS, IN YOUR TYING THEM TO ME. THAT IS ALL YOU NEED TO KNOW. NOW, FOR YOUR OWN WELL-BEING… I COMMAND YOU LEAVE FOR NOW.
I didn't want to leave. I wanted to stay there, burning until there was nothing left, bowing before The Emperor, basking in the presence of my God. But He had ordered otherwise, and I strove to be a faithful servant. With intense longing, I stood and bowed once more before the Golden Throne and He who sat upon it, before turning and reluctantly walking away. I dragged myself away, each step going far quicker and further than the march into this golden place; evidently His realm was pushing me out, rejecting me. I wept bitter tears at leaving, but I also cried in joy.
He had indeed come to me to save those two. They were not damned. As I left His realm, I collapsed in the realm of Slaanesh, forcing myself to absorb the power of the Warp to regain strength.
"~Why hello, Ciaphas.~" A familiar voice whispered in a lover's drawl. Shakily, I turned my head to see… Her. "~You seem to be quite… Pained. Would you like me to… Help soothe your pain? I promise… You will enjoy every second of it.~"
In response, I immediately forced myself out of the Warp and back into my body despite the fact that I wasn't fully recovered. By The Emperor, did everything hurt! It was like I was recovering from a flamer attack! Jurgen was there in the tent, staring at me.
"Sir? You were quite out of it." He said mildly. He was staring above me. "Did the Shy Eldar do something to you again?"
"What… what happened?" I whispered. My aide shrugged and replied, giving me a full yet confusing report.
"Well, that Shy Eldar was inviting you to a tea party and saying that 'Mr. Whiskers' would be happy to let you snuggle with him…"
From the Book of Cain, Chapter 8:
Thus did the Prophet deliver his flock unto the God-Emperor's realm, his faith a burning torch to light the way. And all who saw beyond the material realm beheld the glory of the Prophet's blazing faith. So great was it, that even his very soul could scarce contain it. Yet on the Prophet pressed, dutiful in the task given to him, to safeguard the souls of the faithful unto the God-Emperor's divine realm. And once the souls within his care had been given unto the Most Holy Emperor, the Prophet prostrated himself before the Golden Throne, beholding He On Terra in all His eternal glory.
Yet the Prophet stood once more and departed, doing as he was bid. For though he had seen paradise, the Prophet's duty was not done. Though he longed to remain before the God-Emperor, he still had labors to undergo in His most holy name. And so he turned away from that holy place and returned once more to the mortal realm, that he may continue to serve the Emperor. And though steadfast and faithful, the Prophet wept bitter tears, for it pained him to leave.(10)
1: Before Ciaphas and his ability to consume other daemons for us, we didn't have that option; at least as far as I've been allowed to know.
2: This roughly translates to 'Ender of suffering'. It is usually used in reference to a healer, but Saint Divas' title comes from a different reason, as we all know.
3: Only if you ask a Valhallan.
4: Jurgen has informed me that one of Slaanesh's favorite pastimes is tea parties; and not posh ones, but the types that a very young juvie would partake in, complete with imaginary food and drink. This is despite the fact that Jurgen claims she is a fully grown if somewhat awkward adult Eldar to his eyes. Words cannot describe the shock that was felt in the Ordo Malleus that day when he shared this fact.
5: This is the first recorded Mark of Cain, a symbol that declares someone to be under Cain's protection in the eyes of the Warp. What makes this incredibly useful is that Slaanesh apparently honors Ciaphas' claims, and orders her minions to treat it as if it was her own. And yes, this individual is indeed the younger Arydel Kyrus, who is, as we all know, an Alpha Psyker of great renown within the Astra Militarum and the Imperium as a whole. He is seen as an example of both the value of Psykers and of their need for protection, control, and training.
6: …Dammit Ciaphas, did you really have to try and make me jealous of a Saint?! WHICH I'M NOT!
7: This part of Cain's journey is where he got the informal name of 'The Emperor's Lighthouse'. As a daemon of immense power, the fires of The Emperor have lots of fuel to burn, so they grow hotter and brighter. This brightness is able to be seen by Astropaths, Navigators, and Psykers nearby. Souls lost in the Warp can also see it, and will go towards it. In fact, I have heard from Saint Celestine herself that Cain's immolation has actually saved far more souls than he has personally ferried to the Golden Throne by several orders of magnitude.
8: Words cannot possibly describe my jealousy at this very moment.
9: It is not right to be jealous of those who The God Emperor rewards. It is not right to be jealous of those who The God Emperor rewards. It is not right to be jealous of those who The God Emperor rewards. It is not right to be jealous of those who The God Emperor rewards…
10: In Cainitie traditions, this passage is known as the "Tenant of Duty". Sermons using it focus upon doing one's duty for the Imperium and the God-Emperor, no matter what it costs oneself, and upholds Ciaphas as an example of putting one's duty before their own interests. Amongst some regiments, particularly those from Shrine Worlds dedicated to Cain, it is included in the oaths all Guardsmen take when they pledge their service to the Astra Militarum.