We're back in this story with Jane, who is alone with her daughter for the first time.
Jane and Maura's House
The sun barely filtered through the bedroom curtains, casting a soft light on the crib where little Angela slept. Jane Rizzoli, sitting in the rocking chair next to her, stared at her daughter with an intensity that betrayed both love and a hint of apprehension, and above all, her doubt that she was not up to the task. It was the first time Jane had truly been alone with her daughter. Maura's vacation was over and she had to return to her job as chief medical examiner, especially since Dr. Pike, her replacement, was not the most gifted man for the job, and Vince Korsak had told Jane that he prayed every day that Maura would return as soon as possible. Angela, Jane's mother, was at work, so she couldn't come while Frankie and Nina, as well as Tommy and Susie, were also at work. For the first time since giving birth, there was no one to take over. It was just Jane and her daughter, little Angela.
Jane leaned forward, elbows on her knees, and whispered to herself,
"Okay, Rizzoli. You've faced serial killers, guns pointed at you, and even put up with Frost's jokes and the kitten videos Vince watches whenever he can. You can handle a baby."
A small whimper escaped the crib. Angela stirred, her tiny fists fluttering as if testing the air. Jane froze, her heart beating a little too fast.
Jane whispered, "Oh no, not already..."
Jane stood up quietly, approached the crib, and looked down at her daughter. Sofia's eyelids fluttered, then opened, revealing those big chocolate eyes, those eyes that Maura said were identical to all Rizzolis, and Jane said in her raspy voice, where the love for her daughter was audible, "Hi, little Rizzoli. You slept well. Oh, you're growing well."
Little Angela smiled, then a few minutes later, made a small noise, somewhere between a squeak and a cry. Jane felt a wave of panic rise in her. What if she was crying? What if she was in pain? What if she needed something Jane didn't understand? Jane reached out her hands hesitantly, then withdrew them.
"Okay, wait, wait. We'll take this step by step. You don't look hungry... do you?"
She bit her lip and said, "Your mom, Maura, said you ate two hours ago? I should have written down the time."
Jane was breastfeeding her daughter, but she and Maura were preparing bottles so Maura could nurse little Angela. Then Jane's daughter fidgeted a little more, and Jane took a deep breath.
"Okay, fine. We'll get you out of here."
Jane picked up her daughter, with the caution of a bomb disposal expert facing a bomb, and said, "Okay! Easy... easy..."
Then Jane checked to see if her daughter's diaper needed changing and saw that it didn't. Once Angela was in her arms, Jane cradled her against her shoulder, just like she had done in the maternity ward and just like she had seen Maura do dozens of times. The feel of her daughter's light weight against her made her smile. Then Jane said, "I love you, you know."
A silence fell, broken only by Angela's breathing. Jane began to walk slowly around the room with her daughter in her arms. But a small voice in her head persisted: "What if I hurt her? What if I can't manage on my own?"
She stopped by the window and looked down at Angela, who was staring back at her. "You know, my dear, this is our first day together, and I hope everything goes well." Angela blinked, and Jane felt like she was really listening. Jane sighed, a mixture of exhaustion and emotion, and said, "I don't want to disappoint you, okay? I'm telling you, it's just the two of us, but I promise you one thing: no one will love you more than me. Even if I put your diaper on wrong or put your clothes on backward. Okay, I rarely did that in the maternity ward, but this isn't the maternity ward anymore." Angela let out a little coo, and Jane laughed softly and said, "Yeah, you're right. You and I are a team now."
She went back to sit in the rocking chair, Angela still curled up against her. For the first time since Maura left, Jane felt her doubts ease a little. Not completely—she was Jane Rizzoli, after all, and doubt was part of her DNA. But enough to tell herself she could handle this. One day at a time.
The rocking chair creaked slightly under Jane's weight as she rocked Angela, whose small eyes had closed after a few minutes of rocking. The room was quiet, almost too quiet, and the silence was beginning to weigh on Jane like an old unsolved case. She placed a protective hand on Angela's back, feeling her daughter's warmth through the onesie, but her mind was racing, then whispered, glancing at the clock on the wall.
"Okay, little Angela, you're back to sleep. That's good." We survived… what, an hour and a half? I'm really looking forward to you sleeping through the night, but now what do I do? Do I put you down? What if you wake up and scream?
Jane's eyes flickered to the baby monitor on the table, then to the bottle, then to the pile of neatly arranged diapers. Everything was in place, but Jane felt like a puzzle piece that couldn't seem to find its place in this perfect domestic scene.
A soft noise made Angela jump, and the little girl stirred, and Jane held her breath and whispered more to herself than to her daughter.
"No, no, no, stay calm, stay calm."
Angela fell back asleep almost immediately, but Jane's heart was pounding as if she'd just been chasing a suspect. She sighed loudly.
"Seriously, Jane? You've stood up to mobsters, psychopaths, and now you're afraid of how a baby, who's your daughter, will react."
She closed her eyes for a moment, trying to compose herself, but a doubt crept into her mind like an old wound that refuses to heal, and Jane thought, "What if I'm not cut out for this?"
Jane opened her eyes again and stared at Angela, so peaceful in her arms, and whispered, "Your mother, Maura, knows everything. She's been reading books about babies since long before we decided to have you, and I'm not even talking about your nonna, who's known everything about babies since she was a young woman; this is all new to me." »
A memory came back to him: Maura, that morning, putting on her jacket with that effortless confidence, saying to him before leaving
"You're going to be perfect, Jane darling."
Perfect. Jane chuckled softly.
"Perfect, yeah, you bet. She says that because she doesn't know that I panic just thinking about being alone with you and doing something wrong."
She adjusted her grip on Angela, making sure to support her little head, but her hands were shaking slightly. She hated it—this feeling of not being in control. In the field, she knew what to do: analyze a crime scene, interview a witness, draw her weapon if necessary. But now? No manual, no teammate to cover her back. Just her and this little life that depended on her.
Angela let out a small sigh in her sleep, and Jane whispered, "You know, my little wonder, I won't let you down even when you're twenty."
Jane sighed and thought with a smile, "Twenty, if it comes down to it, I'll be captain of the BPD in twenty years."
Then she said, "Your official grandfather... well, let's not talk about it, but luckily your grandfather Vince adores you, as does your nonna."
A creak in the house—probably just the floorboards moving—startled Jane again, and she groaned. "Great, now I'm paranoid too. It's a cop's reflex, though."
Jane rubbed her temples as if she could chase away the thoughts, then looked down at Angela and whispered, "But you're here, and I don't want you to be afraid of anything. So I have to be better than my doubts."
Jane fell silent, letting silence return. Angela was still asleep, oblivious to her mother's torment. Jane gave a tired smile, and Jane began to move gently again, the motion of the rocking chair becoming almost a lullaby. Her doubts hadn't disappeared—they probably never would completely disappear. But for now, she could hold on. For Angela, she would.
Later that afternoon
Jane was quiet, she had breastfed her daughter, she had played with her daughter, and now Angela was sleeping in a crib in the living room. The quiet of the room shattered like a window pane under a bullet. Angela, until then peaceful in her crib, let out a shrill scream that pierced the silence. Jane jumped, her eyes widening in horror, and said in a panic, "Oh no, no, no, what's going on?"
Jane went to pick up her daughter and said, inspecting her red, contorted face. "Are you in pain? Are you hungry? Tell me what's wrong, my dear?"
Angela's crying intensified, each scream like a stab in Jane's chest as she paced around the room, rocking her daughter with clumsy movements.
"Okay, okay, Rizzoli, keep your cool. It's just a crying baby. You've seen worse. Like... really gory crime scenes, it's just a crying baby, it's just your crying daughter."
Jane sang a nursery rhyme her mother had used to sing to her as a child, but Angela continued to cry, her tiny fists flailing in the air. Jane placed a hand on her stomach, then her forehead, desperately searching for a clue.
"You're not hot, you don't have a fever. Maybe the diaper?"
Jane sniffed quickly and said, "No, I'm fine. So what?"
She felt a lump form in her throat and said, "I'm supposed to know, right? A good mother would." But me, why don't I understand?"
The minutes stretched, each second amplifying her feeling of helplessness and her doubts. Jane stopped by the sofa and sat down heavily, holding Angela against her.
"I'm doing everything wrong, aren't I? You're talking about a first day alone with my daughter. Maura would already be calming her down and would find a scientific explanation for this."
Angela's crying seemed like it would never stop, and Jane felt a wave of panic and doubt wash over her. She placed her daughter on her lap, looking at her with a mixture of despair and frustration.
"Come on, mio tesoro , give me a clue! Tell me what's wrong."
Jane sighed and said, "I can solve complicated cases, but I can't understand my daughter." Her voice cracked on the last word, and she bit her lip, refusing to break down completely.
Just then, the front door opened with a familiar creak. Jane looked up and saw Tommy walking in, a box of donuts in his hand. He stopped dead in his tracks when he saw the scene: his niece Angela crying, and Jane, clearly on the verge of a nervous breakdown. Tommy said, "Oh, what's going on here? This looks like an interrogation gone wrong."
Jane said, "Tommy, she's been crying for ages, and I don't know what to do!"
Tommy crouched down in front of her, watching Angela continue to scream, and said, "Okay, okay, calm down, big sister. Have you tried rocking her?" »
"Yes, I tried! I tried singing, walking, checking her diaper, everything! She definitely hates me."
Tommy raised an eyebrow, a smirk appearing despite the situation.
"She doesn't hate you, Jane. You're her mother."
He held out his arms and said,
"Give her a second."
Jane hesitated, then reluctantly handed Angela over to him. Tommy took her with disarming ease, cradling her against his shoulder and gently patting her back, and Tommy said with an amused look, "You've always been terrible at asking for help, haven't you?"
Jane groaned.
"Oh, shut up."
But Jane couldn't help but stare at Tommy and Angela, hoping for a miracle. The little girl's crying didn't stop immediately, but it seemed to lessen slightly. Jane crossed her arms, feeling both relieved and a little humiliated, and said, "I'm supposed to be able to do this on my own. She's my daughter." Tommy shrugged, continuing to rock Angela. "Yeah, and I'm her uncle. We're family, Jane. You don't have to keep your fears and doubts inside, we're family, I'm telling you, and you know, even badass cops have partners." I want to do everything right, Tommy. Angela deserves better than a mother who freaks out because she's alone with her. Tommy paused for a moment, looking at her with rare gravity. "She has the best mother she could ever have. You're just... learning." It's normal, we've all been there, Frankie, Nina, Susie, me, and even Ma."
Jane smiled and said, "You bet, Ma must have some kind of internal program for taking care of babies and children."
Tommy laughed softly and said, "Even Ma went through what you're going through now, she told Susie and Nina."
Angela let out one last little sob before finally calming down, exhausted. Jane stared at her daughter, then at her brother, and said, "By the way? Why are you here? Mind you, I'm not complaining."
I wanted to spend some time with my sister and niece, and I brought some donuts from Paterello's.
Chocolate donuts?
Tommy replied with a wink.
Sure, and besides, Maura's not here, we can eat sugar in peace.
Jane laughed softly, and Tommy said,
"Here, take your little wonder back, and I'll get the donuts. You look like you could use them."
Jane picked Angela up and said,
"Oh, yes! Thanks, little brother. But if you tell Maura what happened, I'll kill you."
Tommy burst out laughing, and for the first time in hours, Jane felt a weight lift off her shoulders.
Angela was finally calm in Jane's arms, her little sobs reduced to soft sighs. Jane rocked her gently, but her shoulders remained tense, her gaze fixed on her daughter as if she expected another explosion at any moment. Tommy, sitting on the couch opposite her, grabbed a donut from the box he'd brought and then said, "You know, Jane, you're not the first one to freak out like this. I was the same way when TJ was born."
Jane looked up and said, "Really?"
Tommy laughed, taking a bite of the donut before answering.
"Oh, trust me. The first time I was alone with him, he cried for over an hour. I thought I was going crazy. After a while, I called Ma to come save me."
Tommy shook his head, a wistful smile on his lips, then said, "You're not used to it, you just learn it. That's all."
Jane groaned, adjusting Angela against her shoulder.
"I feel like a rookie who's blowing her first day in the field."
Tommy leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, his tone becoming more serious.
"Look, even Frankie was like that. Remember when Nina had to go back to work and he was alone with Abigail for the first time?"
Jane frowned, searching her memory.
"Vaguely." He told me she'd been crying, but he played the hero, as usual."
Tommy laughed and said, "Hero, my eye! He called me in a panic, said, 'Tommy, she's screaming, what do I do? Did I put her diaper on wrong or something?' He was about to break down. We've all been there, Jane. You're not alone in this."
Jane stared at him for a moment, digesting his words. She looked down at Angela, whose face had finally relaxed in sleep, and said,
"Maybe... But you and Frankie always seem to land on your feet with your kids. I don't know if I'll ever make it."
Tommy stood up, moving closer to place a light hand on his sister's shoulder.
"You've got it in you, Jane. You're the most stubborn of the three of us, and if anyone's going to master this mommy stuff, it's you. You just need to stop putting pressure on yourself like you're defusing a bomb."
Jane smiled in spite of herself and said, "Easy for you to say. Have you seen that kid? Right now she's more unpredictable than a suspect on meth. Although Angela is a calm but fidgety baby sometimes."
Tommy burst out laughing, stepping back to pick up a donut.
"That's for sure. But you've got time to learn."
He pointed a finger at her, a mischievous look in his eyes.
"And now I'm going to watch you, just to see you in action. Play it cool, okay? No yelling, no panicking. Just you and your little wonder."
Jane rolled her eyes but smiled and looked down at Sofia again, and her voice softened.
"Thanks, Tommy. Really."
Tommy said, "You're welcome. That's also why I'm here. That, and to feed you donuts until Maura comes back to save you."
He handed her the box.
"Here, have one. You need some sugar to keep you going."
Jane grabbed a donut with one hand, still holding Angela with the other, and muttered with a smile, "If Maura finds out I ate several donuts, I'll report you." »
Tommy replies with a wink.
"Deal, big sister!"
The living room was bathed in soft light on this late afternoon, and Sofia was resting in a crib in the living room, fidgeting slightly in her sleep. Jane, sitting nearby, had placed the half-eaten donut on the coffee table to keep an eye on her daughter. Tommy, sitting in an armchair opposite, arms crossed, watched the scene with a wry smile, true to his word, and said,
"See, everything's fine, you're a good mother."
Jane looked at him, smiling.
"Yeah, well, don't talk too soon. She could wake up and maybe start screaming at any moment."
She reached out to adjust the blanket around Angela, her movements cautious but more assured than before.
"And stop staring at me like I'm a suspect in an interrogation room. That Rizzoli look is reserved for me."
Tommy laughed softly, holding up his hands in innocence.
"What? I'm just watching you, and now it's okay."
Jane cracked a smile. She ran a hand through Angela's already unruly hair and whispered, "I have to succeed. She's my daughter."
Angela chose that moment to open her eyes, letting out a small groan that made Tommy laugh.
"There, she heard you. She wants to test her mother some more."
Jane sighed, but this time, she didn't panic. She gently lifted Angela with relative ease, settling her against her shoulder to pat her back, and then she sniffed discreetly and grimaced.
"Oh, great. It's diaper time. Okay, babe, let's see what you've got. Literally."
Tommy sat up, a mischievous twinkle in his eye.
"Moment of truth, huh? Go on, show me your skills."
Jane rolled her eyes and carried Angela to the changing table in the corner of the living room. She carefully set her daughter down, but her hands hesitated over the buttons of the onesie.
. Tommy approached, staying a respectful distance away so as not to invade her space.
"Relax, Jane. Remember what you did in the maternity ward. You changed diapers there, with the nurses guiding you. It'll be fine."
Yeah, but there were professionals there to tell me if I messed up.
Hey! I managed to change TJ's diapers by myself, so you can do this. It's in your blood. Go ahead, I'm watching."
Jane took a deep breath, then undid the buttons of the onesie with surgical concentration. Angela fidgeted a little, but didn't cry, which gave Jane a slight boost of confidence. Jane opened the dirty diaper, wrinkling her nose at the smell, and said, "Seriously, girl, is it my milk that's making you produce that?"
Tommy burst out laughing.
"Welcome to parenthood, sis. It's part of being a parent."
Jane managed to remove the dirty diaper, quickly balled it up, and tossed it in the trash. She grabbed a wipe and began cleaning her daughter, before grabbing a clean diaper. She unfolded it, slipped it under Angela, and closed the Velcro fasteners with almost military precision. When she was finished, she stepped back, hands on her hips, surveying her handiwork.
"There. It's perfect!"
She turned to Tommy, one eyebrow raised.
"So, coach? Verdict?"
Tommy nodded, impressed.
"Perfect. You handled it like a boss. Even Ma would have applauded." »
Jane buttoned the onesie and took Angela into her arms again, a satisfied smile on her face. She cuddled her daughter against her and added,
"Thanks, Tommy."
Tommy smiled.
"I told you, you were made for this. You just have to trust yourself and push aside your doubts. And I'm here to help you and bring you donuts."
He winked at her and said, "Now rest a little before the little wonder decides she wants another round."
Jane laughed softly, sitting back down on the couch with Angela. For the first time all day, she felt a little lighter, but not...
Jane rocked Angela gently on the couch, the little one finally calm after the diaper change. She stared at her daughter, a mixture of pride and uncertainty in her eyes, then sighed and shook her head.
"Maura would have handled this better than me. She would have known exactly what to do. I wing it like a kid playing with dolls."
Tommy, who was sitting next to Jane and her niece, said with a smile, "I doubt it. Maura, on this subject, is like any other mother. She too will doubt, and maybe even panic." We know, Nina and Susie said so when they had to take care of Abigail and Olivia alone for the first time."
Jane frowned, skeptical.
"Nina and Susie? They never told me that. They always seem so... confident."
Tommy snorted, straightening up a little.
"Confident, huh? Susie called me in a panic, like two hours before I left the construction site where I was working that day. She was completely panicking because Olivia was crying non-stop. I came as fast as I could, but when I got there, Ma was already there.
And as for Nina...
Oh, that's another story. Nina, on the first day she was alone with Abigail, called her mother to find out what to do, and Ma arrived at Frankie's shortly after."
He laughed softly.
"Ma must have sensed that her granddaughters were in trouble. She has a radar for that."
Jane laughed too and said, "That sounds just like Ma. But she's not here today."
Jane looked down at her daughter, gently stroking her small back.
"It's just you and me today."
Tommy gave her a knowing look and said, "Maybe not yet, but you can be sure Ma will come; she always does."
Before Jane could reply, a familiar sound echoed through the entryway: the slam of the front door opening, followed by the unmistakable sound of Angela's footsteps on the floor. Tommy burst out laughing, a full, booming laugh, while Jane looked up in surprise. Angela entered the living room, a shopping bag in one hand and her eternally determined expression on her face. She immediately said, placing the bag by the door,
"I'm sure my granddaughter is in trouble."
She scanned the room, her eyes immediately falling on Jane and little Angela. Jane blinked, mouth agape, still holding Angela, and asked, half in disbelief, half in admiration.
"But how do you know that, Ma?"
Angela stepped forward, a sweet but confident smile lighting up her face. She reached out to take her granddaughter, whom Jane handed over almost automatically, and Angela said as if it were obvious.
"All grandmothers know when their grandchildren are in trouble."
She rocked Angela with natural ease, glancing at Jane.
"And you, my darling daughter, you need a mother to tell you that you did a good job."
Tommy turned to Jane.
"I told you! She's got radar for that."
Jane shook her head as she watched Angela rock her daughter with infinite tenderness and said,
"But seriously, Ma, it's a little scary seeing you arrive like this. How do you do it?"
Angela shrugged, never taking her eyes off her little girl, and said,
"That's love, and you'll do the same when your daughter is older, and you're already on the right track, Jane."
She looked up at her daughter and said,
"Don't be ashamed to ask for help. Being a mother is a wonderful thing, but it's a learning process. It's normal to have doubts and even to be afraid."
Tommy said,
"I told him, Ma."
Then he grabbed another donut and handed it to Jane.
"Here, eat this and stop worrying."
Jane took the donut, a tired but genuine smile on her lips.
"Thanks, anyway. It's sometimes hard taking care of a child, and Ma, I imagine what you went through when Tommy came into the world, three children to take care of, and you, Tommy, you have two and you managed, and I doubt I can take care of just one child."
Angela and Tommy exchanged a knowing look before bursting out laughing, and Angela said,
"That's what being a parent is, Jane, but you'll see, you'll love it so much you'll want to have more children."
Jane had leaned back on the sofa, arms crossed, watching her mother rock Angela with an ease that made her almost jealous. Tommy listened to the conversation in silence. Jane sighed, then began, a little hesitantly.
"Ma, I swear, it was chaos earlier. Angela was crying non-stop, I didn't know what to do. I tried rocking her, changing her, talking to her... nothing worked. I felt completely worthless."
Angela looked at Jane, a soft smile on her lips. She adjusted her little girl in her arms before answering.
"You're a good mother, Jane, and you're a good parent. You know, everything can be learned, and you and Maura are doing a good job with this little gem. You just have to pay attention to the signs your daughter is giving.
I'm not used to it, Ma. I know how to read the signs of a suspect: a nervous tic, a shifty glance, a poorly crafted lie. I've mastered that, but this..."
She gestured to her daughter.
"I'm not picking up on my daughter's signs yet. Not yet."
Angela laughed softly, a warm sound that filled the room. She rocked her granddaughter with infinite tenderness, her eyes sparkling with wisdom accumulated over the years.
"So, Jane, imagine your daughter is a mute person who asks Detective Jane Rizzoli for help. Decipher her gestures, her little noises, as if it were a case. And you'll see, it'll be fine."
Jane blinked, digesting the idea. She smiled.
"A mute person, huh? I hope so, because you would have heard her crying earlier. I thought I was going deaf."
Angela burst into a hearty laugh, a laugh that startled Tommy and made her granddaughter smile.
"Just like me when you were a baby! You were a quiet baby, but with quite a temper." And sometimes you would start screaming... My God, what vocal power! Mr. and Mrs. Alligretti would hear you cry sometimes."
Jane's eyes widened, visibly taken aback.
"But... they lived almost half a mile from us!"
Angela nodded, a mischievous twinkle in her eye.
"And yet, they heard you. In the neighborhood, you were known as the baby with the powerful voice. Some even thought you'd grow up to be an opera singer."
She looked down at little Angela, who was looking at her grandmother, a small stuffed animal in her hand.
"And your daughter inherited that. Maura wanted a mini Jane, and she got her: the hair, the chocolate eyes, the dimples, the voice, and the personality. In short, a real Jane Rizzoli."
Jane burst out laughing, a raucous, genuine laugh that made the room vibrate.
"Seriously, Ma? You're telling me my daughter takes after me? Maura's going to love it when I tell her."
Tommy, who had been listening silently until then, chimed in with a big smile.
"Oh, she'll mostly say it's genetic, and she'll find a scientific article to prove it. But yeah, Angela, she's just you in miniature."
Jane shook her head, still amused, but her eyes softened as she looked at her daughter in Angela's arms.
"A mini Jane, eh? I have to learn to deal with that, then. Because if she has my temper, it's going to be messy."
Angela gave her a knowing look, gently squeezing little Angela against her.
"You'll get there, Jane." You've outlived yourself before, and that was no easy feat, considering how daredevil you are. This girl? She's just another case. And you're the best detective I know."
Jane smiled, a real smile this time, without sarcasm or doubt.
"Thanks, Ma. But if she starts screaming from half a mile away, I'll call for backup."
Angela laughed again, and Tommy laughed too.
Jane, still sitting on the couch, glanced at Tommy, who was finishing his donut. Angela was fidgeting with amusement in her grandmother's arms, and Jane said,
"You know, Ma, Tommy really helped me today. I was this close to losing it with Angela, and he showed up at just the right moment."
Tommy said, "Hey, that's my job as a brother, right? Ease my sister's doubts and give her the benefit of my experience as a parent."
He checked his watch and suddenly sat up.
"Oh, damn, I have to go. I have to pick up TJ and Olivia from school. Susie is working a little later this evening. "
He stood up, grabbing his jacket from the back of the chair, then turned to Jane, his tone becoming more serious.
"Look, Jane, you've always been good at what you did. You're going to be good at this too. You had doubts when you started your first day as a police officer out of the academy, and this is no different. This is your first day alone with your daughter, and in my experience, you did great."
Jane stared at him for a moment and smiled.
"Thanks, Tommy. Yeah, that's exactly right. I doubted myself just as much that day. I still remember my hands shaking as I put on my uniform."
Tommy patted her gently on the shoulder, a simple but comforting brotherly gesture.
"And you ended up becoming the best cop we know. So relax, sis. You're on the right track."
He turned to his mother, who was sitting on the playmat watching little Angela. Her mother gave her a loving look, and Angela said,
"Give TJ, Olivia, and Susie a kiss for us. And drive carefully!"
Tommy kissed his niece on the cheek, and she giggled. He ran his hand through her hair and said,
"Hi, little Jane! Be good to your mama!"
Then he gave his sister and mother a little wave, then disappeared through the front door, leaving behind a gentle silence, broken only by the faint sound of little Angela's breathing. Jane stared at the door for a moment, then turned to Angela, who was looking at her with tenderness mixed with pride.
Angela spoke first, her voice calm but assured.
"I had my doubts too, you know. When you came into the world, and later Frankie and Tommy... I was always wondering if I was going to make it, and I did, and you will too. Get those doubts out of your head, Jane. You put yourself through the wringer, but look at you now, you're a wonderful mother, you're strong, you're smart, and you have a heart this big. This little wonder is lucky to have you."
She paused, then added with a wink, "And you have a mother, brothers, sisters-in-law, and most importantly, an incredible wife to help you out."
Jane laughed again and said, "Yeah, right. I've got you all."
She reached out to Angela and said to her mother, "Come on, Ma, give her a hand." "I miss her." Angela entrusted little Angela to her with a knowing look, and Jane tucked her daughter against her, whispering, "Okay, mini-me, we'll get there. But do me a favor, my treasure: no screaming from half a mile away tonight, okay?"
Angela spoke first, her voice calm but assured.
"I had my doubts too, you know. When you came into the world, and later Frankie and Tommy... I was always wondering if I was going to make it, and I did, and you will too. Get those doubts out of your head, Jane. You put yourself through the wringer, but look at you now, you're a wonderful mother, you're strong, you're smart, and you have a heart this big. This little wonder is lucky to have you."
She paused, then added with a wink, "And you have a mother, brothers, sisters-in-law, and most importantly, an incredible wife to help you out."
Jane laughed again and said,
"Yeah, right. I've got you all."
She reached out to Angela and said to her mother,
"Come on, Ma, give her a hand. I miss her."
Angela entrusted little Angela to her with a knowing look, and Jane tucked her daughter against her, whispering,
"Okay, mini-me, we'll get there. But do me a favor, mio tesoro : no screaming from half a mile away tonight, okay?"
Angela laughed heartily, and the living room filled once again with that Rizzoli warmth—a mixture of love and joy.
Early Evening
The evening light filtered through the living room windows, bathing the room in an orange hue. Angela slept in her crib next to the sofa where Jane sat, her legs tucked under her, a mug of coffee in her hand. Angela had left an hour earlier, leaving behind a full meal and words of encouragement still fresh in Jane's mind. The sound of the key in the lock announced Maura's arrival, and Jane looked up, a mixture of relief and love in her eyes.
Maura came in, her bag slung over her shoulder, and she set her things by the door and walked over to Jane, a soft but curious smile on her face. Once seated next to Jane, Maura said,
"Good evening, love. So, how was your day with our little gem?" »
Jane sighed, placing her mug on the coffee table before turning to Maura.
"Oh, Maura, where to begin? Let's just say it was... intense. At first, it was okay, then in the afternoon, Angela cried as if she wanted to alert the whole neighborhood. I panicked, doubted everything, and thought I was going to go deaf or crazy—maybe both. Tommy showed up with some donuts. Yes, I ate them."
Maura said.
"Are these the ones from Paterello's?
Yes, amore mio.
They're made with natural ingredients, they're fine by me, and I eat them too."
So, Tommy managed to calm Angela down and managed to calm me down. I was able to calmly change our daughter's diaper, and then Ma magically arrived. She told me I was a good mother, but honestly, I felt like a total loser all day."
Maura listened attentively, her gaze fixed on Jane with infinite patience. When Jane finished, she placed a hand on hers, gently squeezing it, and kissed her tenderly. She said, "Jane, everything you're describing is perfectly normal. First times alone with a baby are always chaotic, even for the most prepared parents. The crying, the doubts, the feeling of not being good enough... it's a universal learning curve."
Jane raised an eyebrow, half skeptical, half amused.
"Universal, huh? You have a scientific article on this in your pocket?"
Maura smiled, a mischievous twinkle in her eye.
"You don't need one, even though I could give you a dozen. But seriously, even I know I'll have doubts too when it's my turn to be alone with her. It's an experience, not just a theory." »
Maura paused, gently stroking Jane's hand.
"And you know what? You did great. Angela is asleep and you're doing great. That's a victory."
Ma told me I was the same as a baby—a 'big vocal powerhouse,' she said. Apparently, Angela takes after me."
Maura laughed softly, her eyes lighting up.
"Oh, I'm not surprised at all. She's a mini Jane, with your voice, your hair, and let's be honest—your tenacity and character. I always knew she'd be a mini you."
She leaned down to kiss Jane on the temple, a tender gesture that melted away the last of the day's tension.
Jane finally relaxed, letting her head rest against Maura's shoulder.
"Are you sure you didn't give her your obsession with perfect things? Because that kid can be demanding sometimes, I swear."
Maura giggled, wrapping an arm around Jane to pull her close.
"Maybe a little of both." But what matters is that we learn together. And today, you did a hell of a job, Detective Rizzoli."
Jane closed her eyes for a moment, savoring Maura's warmth and the newfound tranquility.
"Yeah, well, I hope tomorrow will be easier, but with you here, I already feel a little less lost."
Maura whispered, a smile in her voice, "Always there for you and for our daughter. We're a team, remember."
The silence fell, comfortable and soothing, as the two women watched their daughter sleep, an invisible bond uniting them in this new adventure they were discovering step by step. Later that evening, Jane's phone vibrated on the coffee table, displaying an incoming call from Angela. Jane answered, putting it on speakerphone so Maura could hear.
"Yes, Ma?"
Angela's voice, lively and full of energy, echoed through the room.
"I just wanted to know how things went with my little wonder today. Have you told Maura everything?"
Jane glanced at Maura, who nodded with an amused smile.
"Your little wonder is fast asleep, and I told Maura everything: the crying, the panic, Tommy, you... the whole mess."
Angela laughed softly on the other end of the line.
"And what did Maura say?"
Maura leaned toward the phone and said, "That it's perfectly normal to have doubts and feel overwhelmed the first time you're alone with a baby. A universal experience, even for the most prepared parents."
Angela laughed, satisfied.
"You see, Jane? Maura is saying exactly the same thing I'm saying. You'll see, tomorrow everything will be perfect, and you won't even need any help from Tommy, Frankie, Susie, Nina, or me."
Jane smiled, squeezing Maura's hand in hers. She looked down for a moment, then answered, her voice softer than usual.
"I'll always need you, Ma."
A tender silence followed, then Angela answered, a smile audible in her voice.
"I know, darling. I know." »
She paused, then added,
"I'll always be there for my children and grandchildren. Rest well, both of you. Kisses to Angela from her Nonna. Good night, Jane, good night, Maura."
"I promise, Ma. Good night."
Maura said.
"I promise, Angela, good night!"
Jane hung up, setting the phone down with a sigh. She turned to Maura, who was watching her with obvious affection, and Jane said, "She's right, isn't she?"
Maura nodded affirmatively. "As usual. Tomorrow will be a new day, and you'll be even more comfortable."
And Angela was right. The next day went perfectly. Angela woke with a soft gurgle, and Jane, though cautious at first, found a rhythm. She breastfed her daughter, changed a diaper without hesitation, played with her, and rocked Sofia to a peaceful, carefree nap. With each step, she felt another doubt dissipate, replaced by a growing confidence.
When Maura and Angela returned home late that afternoon, Jane greeted them with a tired but proud smile. Angela was asleep in her arms, and Jane watched them enter, happy to see them take over. Maura leaned forward to kiss Jane on the lips, while Angela kissed Jane on the cheek and said, "So, Janie, I told you you'd make it!"
Jane laughed softly, passing her daughter to Maura with effortless care.
"Yeah, Ma, you were right. And you too, Maura. But I swear, I wouldn't trade being a mother for anything. Even with the crying, the diapers, and all."
Maura hugged her daughter, exchanging a knowing look with Angela, and said with a big smile, "And we wouldn't trade you for anything either."
Angela stepped forward, placing a hand on Jane's shoulder.
"A true Rizzoli, through and through. And a hell of a mom."
She sat down on the bench with her wife and mother, her daughter nestled between them, and Jane felt another hint of doubt disappear.
The end